


In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)

by SpicyPepper_SweetSugar



Series: The Blink Series [1]
Category: The Walking Dead - All Media Types
Genre: AU - Beth Lives, AU twist, Angst, Beth Greene Lives, Coda fix-it, F/M, I'll wait for Beth, Nothing too explicit, Potential Spoilers, Romance, Slow Burn, Team Delusional, bethyl, falling in love all over again, future smut scenes, mostly Bethyl but I couldn't help hinting at some, post 5x08
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-04
Updated: 2015-08-17
Packaged: 2018-02-28 04:33:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 27
Words: 223,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2718905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpicyPepper_SweetSugar/pseuds/SpicyPepper_SweetSugar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post 5x08 "Coda". The group deals with the loss of Beth and Daryl is slowly distancing himself. Then one day, the strangest thing happens and his world is turned upside-down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey you peeps! This is my first ever Walking Dead fic! I'm a Bethyl shipper and as you can all guess, I was very upset with how the mid-season finale ended, so I decided to contribute with my own story of what happened after it. Hopefully, you'll like it enough to comment, but please be kind if the characters seem a little OOC (remember it's my first time writing them!).  
> Oh and this has the potential of becoming a longer fic, but I'd appreciate it if you told me if you want me to continue with it, even though I have a lot of things going on at the moment and probably won't be able to write it within the next week or so.  
> :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Grady, Daryl has a hard time dealing with what happened. Seven months later, the group crosses paths with a familiar face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: I went back and edited this chapter a bit, fixing minor mistakes and some other issues. Nothing major has been changed which could effect the story somehow. I'm going to keep fixing the other chapters up as soon as I have time. This chapter was edited April 13, 2016.

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 1

 

He kept seeing it happen.

He kept seeing it, every single night that he went to bed and tried to fall asleep.

He heard the gunshot, saw the bullet exit through the back of her head, her falling as her blood sprayed and covered Rick's face.

He saw himself reacting, shooting the woman who shot her –  _ Dawn  _ – point blank, no questions asked, no more chances given. He saw himself, chin trembling, tears welling over, showing weakness in front of everyone in that damned hallway, as he knelt on the floor next to her and cried over her dead body.

He saw it every time he closed his eyes.

Saw her walking toward him after they had already traded Carol back. He still remembered the way his hand lingered on her shoulder as he pushed her back toward their group, never taking his eyes off the enemy as he did it. He kept  _ feeling _ how warm she was and he remembered how he had allowed himself one moment of happiness at finally finding her and bringing her back.

But that moment was usually fleeting, because he then remembered how she had fallen and he felt sick once again.

It didn’t matter that he still saw her late at night; that the memory of her death still plagued him in his nightmares. Sometimes, he was glad that he actually got to see her, just because he missed her, but the nightmares continuously reminded him of the fact that he hadn't been able to save her; another innocent that he failed to protect.

It didn’t matter, because Beth Greene was still dead and Daryl knew there was nothing he could do to change that.

* * *

Maggie cried constantly after Atlanta.

Daryl understood that she was upset about her sister's death, because they all were, but he at times he wished that the woman would just  _ shut up _ about it all and stop reminding him of Beth all the time.

After they buried the blonde that he knew he would never be able to forget, Maggie's eyes never seemed to dry and Glenn could do nothing but helplessly watch her as he tried to comfort her.

To be quite honest, no one seemed to know what to do next or how to function properly after what had happened, but they stuck together, like always, and began making their way through the state, looking for another safe place where they might be able to find a sanctuary, for a while at least. Abraham, Rosita, Eugene and Tara officially became a part of their family and Father Gabriel tagged along as well, even though Daryl didn’t trust trust him very much.

Michonne had expressed her worries about the reverend when she had told Rick and Daryl about how the man's stupidity had lead to the downfall of the church they had been staying at before they had gone off to Atlanta. Daryl had almost gone livid when he had understood that the man had lead a bunch of walkers straight to the church where the Little Asskicker and Carl were at, and he had been ready to throw him out of the group right that second. Rick, however, had decided that they needed to give the priest another chance, because apparently, that was what Beth would have wanted.

At the mention of the blonde's name, Daryl had drawn back and left the others standing, not wanting to hear another word.

* * *

The other addition to their family, Noah, started following Daryl around about a week after they had buried Beth.

The younger man had still been a bit wary of the others, but he trusted both Daryl and Carol since they had been the first ones that he had encountered out of them all. Daryl was almost one hundred percent sure that Carol had put Noah up to the task of not letting Daryl have a single moment alone, and it annoyed him to no end.

He still couldn't stand Maggie's crying and he couldn't stand people looking at him like he had changed.

He knew he had, but he didn't need people constantly pointing it out for him.

All he wanted then was to be left alone; to mourn the girl he had grown to care for so much during the time that they had been by themselves. He wanted to mourn, forget and move on, but Noah was a constant reminder of what had happened and the kid didn't help much by casually mentioning Beth before breaking down in tears in front of Daryl, who would always end up patting him on the back, telling him that things would be okay eventually, deep down knowing that they never would be.

* * *

They never stopped moving.

For three months straight, they were on the roads, scavenging whatever they could find along the way, killing as many walkers as they could, never resting.

Daryl found himself another motorcycle, similar to the one he once had, and he distracted himself by tinkering on it every chance he got. He kept watch during most nights, needing the silence that surrounded them every night and the darkness, to cover up the fact that tears still slipped from his eyes every now and then, more often than he would ever like to admit even to himself. Beth still consumed him and every breath he took was a reminder of the breaths that she would never be able to take.

She wasn't there, but she was everywhere.

And it  _ hurt. _

* * *

He was keeping watch one night, six months after  _ it _ had happened when Carol approached him.

Her injuries had healed and she was quicker on her feet again, but Daryl could still see the change in her. Before she was run over and taken to that hospital, his friend had been close to falling off the deep end. She had changed so much that she barely recognized herself anymore and back then, Daryl had tried to tell her that she was just going through something and that she would come back from it.

Seeing Beth killed so suddenly, tragically and supposedly  _ accidentally _ , seemed to have brought back the Carol he had once known. The woman had found her place in the group again, knowing that she would never be able to leave them to go through that kind of grief, that kind of loss, alone. She needed them as much as they needed her, so she stayed and never tried to leave again.

Daryl suspected it also had something to do with him.

Carol had been his friend ever since the day he had gone out to look for Sophia and since then, she had always been there for him. Not romantically, but as family. The woman was the person he considered to be the mother of their group and he knew that whatever feelings he had for her were platonic and that she felt the same.

Carol had taken Noah under her wing, which had been a little bit surprising since she had almost shot him that time when he had stolen their weapons from them in Atlanta. She had been teaching him how to defend himself and how to kill walkers more efficiently and deep down, Daryl knew that that too was a way for her to move forward from everything that they had lived through; to try to move on from the loss of Beth.

"You can't keep doing this, Daryl," the woman said as she sat down next to him. They were sitting by the small fire they had put up in a small clearing in the woods. The others were already fast asleep and Daryl had offered to take the first watch since he couldn't sleep anyway; too many painful memories resurfacing every time he closed his eyes.

"I ain't doin' nothin'," Daryl muttered, glaring into the small fire. He refused to look at Carol, who he knew was staring at him, mostly because he doesn't want to break down in front of her, like he had done at the hospital when he had cradled Beth's lifeless body against his chest.

"You're distancing yourself," she told him, her voice not wavering. "If you keep going like this, you're going to get yourself killed, or worse."

"Haven't died yet, so..." he trailed off, still not looking at her.

She reached over and touched his arm, "You can't keep doing this." He looked up at her then, because she sounded broken and he didn't want to hurt others just because he was hurting himself. He shook his head, but clasped her hand, still not saying anything.

They sat together, watching the fire burn out in front of them as the sun slowly rose above the horizon, coloring the sky in a light pink and orange.

_ ‘Don't you think that's beautiful?’ _

Daryl swallowed down his tears as Beth's words circled around inside his head for the thousandth time since she had disappeared from his life.

* * *

Exactly a month after Carol had tried to talk to him, Rick seemed to finally have had enough of his behavior.

This time, they had found a bar in a practically abandoned town. They cleaned it out and secured the doors and windows, making sure that no light from the inside could be seen outside in case any walkers passed through the street at night.

Carol had gone to put Judith to bed and Carl too has already fallen asleep in the adjoining room that seemed to have been an office before. Michonne and Noah were still securing the back door with Abraham and Rosita, so only Glenn, Maggie, Tara, Eugene, Daryl and Rick were in the main room of the bar since Father Gabriel too decided to go to bed earlier. Sasha and Tyreese had been gone for half an hour, checking the perimeter from the roof, trying to get a better look at possible threats.

"Daryl, I need you back," Rick told him, his voice lowered so that the others in the room wouldn't hear him. "I need you back, brother."

Daryl turned away from the front door that he had been staring at and looked at Rick, whose eyes never wavered "What are ya talkin' 'bout? I'm here, aren't I?" he asked, crossing his arms.

"You haven't been with us for seven months, Daryl," Rick tried again, but Daryl only scoffed, pushing his way past the other man as he rounded the bar and reached for the abandoned whiskey that Tara had found a little earlier when she had looked through the shelves in the back.

He made a show of wiping one of the glasses with his red rag before putting it on the table, almost slamming it down. The noise caught the attention of Maggie and Glenn, who had been sitting huddled up close together, Glenn always whispering words of comfort to Maggie who had finally stopped crying.

Daryl poured himself a glass and the action took him back to that time in the abandoned moonshine shack where he had poured Beth her first drink. His throat felt thick all of the sudden, but he hid it by downing the entire glass, putting it back on the table, before filling it up again.

"Ya want one?" he asked Rick, pushing the newly filled glass toward the other man who only narrowed his eyes at him.

"You can't keep doing this," Rick told him again, much like Carol had a month ago. "Beth wouldn't want you to do this-"

Daryl slammed his hand down against the bar, the sound vibrating through the room and suddenly he was well aware of the danger he was putting everyone in by being so loud. Rick only stared at him and Daryl lowered his voice as he spoke so that he wouldn't draw any more attention from the dead that were probably wandering outside on the street, "Don't tell me what  _ she _ would'a wanted me to do. None of ya know what she would'a wanted me to do!"

He decided that he was done being sad; done being upset. Now, he was just pissed off at everyone and everything; the world and  _ himself _ .

Rick didn't back down as he took another step toward him and somewhere in his peripheral view Daryl saw Maggie, Glenn and the others stand up, as if they were afraid that he and Rick would start throwing punches at each other any moment.

"We all loved her, Daryl!" Rick snapped at him and Daryl felt himself faltering.

He glared at Rick, staring him down, "No,  _ ya don't get it _ !" His exclamation was loud enough to draw the others closer, but not loud enough for the walkers outside to hear them.

Daryl felt the tears stinging in his eyes as he remembered how Beth had once spoken the same words to him. He didn’t look away and he didn’t move his eyes away from Rick's, trying to make him  _ see. _

Rick finally paused and took a small step back, appraising him from afar. Daryl noticed how the man's eyes moved from Daryl's tear filled eyes, to his balled up fists that remained resting on the bar counter and back up to his trembling chin.

Realization was there and suddenly Rick seemed to  _ finally _ put the missing pieces together.

Daryl wasn't just mourning his friend or a part of his family, like Rick and the others were. Daryl was mourning someone who meant a lot more to him than they ever would have been able to guess.

Rick didn’t tell him that his own mind traveled back to the time that he lost himself after Lori's death and how Daryl's behavior was so clear to him in that moment, that he didn’t understand how he could have missed it before.

Rick ran a hand through his dirty hair, sighing loudly as his hand fell to his beard covered chin as he once again took Daryl in. "What happened when you two were separated from us, man?" he asked and Daryl could see in Rick's eyes that he truly wanted to know, while also not wanting to impose. "Something changed, Daryl. You can't deny that," Rick paused for a beat. "So what changed?"

Daryl blinked at him a few times, willing his tears away as he shook his head and finally looked down at the drink in front of him, "Everythin' changed."

* * *

The rest of the people in their group stopped asking questions after that night in the bar; stopped trying to get him to open up and talk.

They all knew that he would come around sooner or later and Daryl was happy that he finally got some peace and quiet, focusing solely on keeping everyone safe and killing as many walkers as he could.

At night, he still didn't sleep much. He was always seeing Beth's cerulean eyes looking at him as she walked toward him in that hallway in the hospital. He always saw the way she had looked at him that night at the funeral home, right before he had gone to open the door.

During daytime, Maggie came up to talk to him at least once, always around the same time. Thankfully, she never mentioned Beth or asked him what had actually happened between him and her younger sister, but Daryl knew enough to understand that Maggie had gained some kind of feeling of responsibility toward him. He would never really understand  _ why  _ though, because everyone knew that Daryl didn't need a babysitter, but he humored the woman, telling himself that if it kept her from breaking down and crying again, he could live with it.

* * *

They found a small gas-station and hoped that there would be something there that could be useful for them. They disposed of the three walkers inside without drawing any attention to themselves. Not that it would have made a difference though, since the gas-station was in the middle of nowhere, but neither of them wanted to risk making too much noise if a herd of walkers had been walking through the woods surrounding them.

"Look what I found!" Carl grinned, holding out a pack of smokes toward Daryl, who pocketed them immediately. He ruffled the kid's hair, silently thanking him, knowing that Carl had used the cigarettes to try and lighten the mood.

Michonne was walking around the store with Judith in her hands, looking for anything that the baby in her arms might like. Rick found two bags of chips in the back and threw them at Carl, who happily took them out to Carol and the others who were waiting outside.

They had decided to take turns going in, everyone looking for things of their own liking so that nothing would be missed.

As Daryl was crouching down behind the counter to see if there's any weapon hidden there they heard an awfully familiar noise.

A truck was approaching outside.

Daryl was alert in less than a second, and raised his crossbow as he jumped over the counter, following Rick out of the shop. Rick gave Michonne strict orders to stay inside with Judith and Daryl made sure to push Carl inside the station, even though he knew the kid could hold his own outside. He nodded at Noah and Carol, who went inside as well, taking Father Gabriel with them, leaving Sasha, Tyreese, Tara, Glenn, Maggie, the former DC-crew (minus Eugene who also scurried inside), Rick and Daryl outside.

It was just a single, old orange pickup-truck though, but they stayed to see to it that whoever it was that was inside the truck didn't get any ideas of threatening them. The man inside the truck parked on the other side of the street and stepped out of the car, his hands already in the air.

Daryl's finger itched to release the bolt he had nocked on his crossbow, although he waited for any sign that Rick might give him.

"Hey!" the man who approaches them called out. "Rick Grimes? That you?"

Daryl could only stare as Rick slowly lowered his gun, squinting at the man who walked toward them, hands still in the air.

"You know this guy?" Daryl whispered to Rick, who took a step forward, trying to get a better look.

"Morgan?" Rick finally asked, making the other man chuckle.

"Bet ya didn't think you'd see me again!" the man replied, stepping toward Rick.

"It's okay," Rick told them and they all lowered their weapons and watched as the man–  _ Morgan _ – embraced Rick.

Daryl remembered the story Michonne told him about the crazy man that had saved Rick's life when he had gotten out of the hospital and wondered whether this was the same Morgan that she had talked about. He didn't seem too crazy, but Daryl wasn't willing to take any chances with him.

He kept his finger on the trigger, even though his crossbow remained lowered.

"You're still alive then," Morgan laughed, hands on Rick's shoulders as he took the rest of them in, whistling softly. "And you seem to have quite a big group goin' too! You got a camp set up somewhere?"

"Nah," Rick shook his head. "Still looking for a safe place."

Daryl felt the urge to tell Rick to shut up and not reveal too much to the man, but he refrained from saying anything. There was always a risk with people that they used to know. One could get blinded for a moment and miss the threats that might still be around them.

"You got anything set up somewhere?" Rick asked Morgan, who nodded.

"It's a farm," he said. "Been there for a few months now. Repaired most of the fences myself and so far I've only come across a few walkers, but they were all on their own, so I took care of 'em."

"A farm?" Maggie repeated, stepping forward. Behind her, Glenn looked down and Daryl immediately knew that he too was thinking back to the Greene farm where they had once been quite happy. "You're all alone there?"

Morgan considered Maggie's question for a while, before finally shaking his head. "Not alone," he answered. "Just me and Lady though, so there's plenty of room, if you're interested." He looked back to Rick, who seemed to genuinely be contemplating it.

Behind Daryl, the doors opened and Michonne stepped outside, her sword still by her side as she walked toward them. She recognized Morgan, it seems, because she looked over at Daryl and gave him a look that told him to be wary.

"More people!" Morgan exclaimed happily. "Strength in numbers, Rick Grimes. You should all come with me."

"Then what?" Daryl sneered. "Ya turn out to be a liar an' we risk our lives for nothin'? No thank you."

"Daryl," Rick said calmly. "We need to consider this."

"There's nothin' to consider, Rick," Daryl protested. "Ya told me 'bout this man when we were at the prison. Ya told me that he'd gone shit crazy in isolation."

"I'm better," Morgan said calmly, not looking the least offended by what Daryl had said. "I'll admit I fell off the wagon for a while, but Lady made me better."

Daryl shook his head again, despite what Morgan had said.

"We should vote," Tara piped up. "It's the fairest thing."

So they did.

Daryl voted no, along with Maggie who didn't want to leave him behind and Glenn who didn't want to leave Maggie behind. Michonne also joined them, telling Rick that it's too big of a risk and that they shouldn't risk Carl and Judith like that. Rick tried to tell her that they still had strength in numbers and that if anything seemed off, they would be able to get the kids out of there safely.

When Morgan suggested that a few of them come along with him to check the place out for themselves while the others waited at the station, they refused his offer, not wanting to get separated.

In the end, the decision was made and they got in their respective vehicles that they had acquired along the way and allowed Morgan to lead the way with his pick-up.

They arrived right before nightfall. Judith was already sound asleep in Rick's arms and Carl's head had dropped to Michonne's shoulder. The adults were all awake though and as they parked their cars in front of the house, Daryl looked at the big house that stood before them.

It would definitively have enough room for all of them, but he still wasn't too open on trusting this Morgan fellow.

"It's like we've gone back in time," Carol mused beside him and he agreed with a nod. The house looked almost like an exact copy of the Greene house, and the barn further away looked similar too. There was a big field around them, but the field itself was surrounded by a forest.

It felt as if they were back on Hershel's farm and it was painful to see, because it once again brought back all the memories of the older man and his youngest daughter.

"We should head inside," Morgan told them, leaving the keys inside the truck. "I always do that. In case something ever goes wrong you know, and I need to get myself and Lady out. It was her idea actually."

Daryl once again resisted the urge to tell Rick that the man that had brought them to the farm was crazy if he had been keeping a dog alive all this time as his only company and had been having conversations with the mutt. Although, he didn't say anything, but he followed the rest of his group inside the house.

It was quiet, but it looked homey.

There were a couple of pairs of shoes on the floor next to the door and Daryl swallowed as he saw a pair of  _ Converse _ sneakers that he knew Beth would have loved to wear. Tearing his eyes away from the shoes, Rick signaled for him and the others to come with him to check out the living room.

"I should probably bring Lady downstairs so that you can all meet her," Morgan said thoughtfully as the more tired part of the group settled down on the sofa which was surprisingly clean and soft. Daryl stayed in his corner, eyes still narrowed suspiciously at Morgan.

The man walked over to the stairs on the other side of the room and called out, "Hey Lady! I brought some people back with me! Why don't you come down and meet them?"

_ The man is insane _ , Daryl thought, almost chuckling to himself at Rick's stupidity for convincing everyone else that Morgan was well enough to trust after having just one conversation with him.

Daryl expected the sound of pads to come from upstairs, but the sound that followed Morgan's call was not from an animal. The footsteps were human and Daryl's hand rested on his crossbow, just in case.

Whoever it was, the person descended the stairs slowly, or perhaps it was just time that slowed down around them?

First, the sock-clad feet came into view; a bright pink color that Daryl hadn't seen in a long time in this dark world. Then, the thin, but strong legs that were covered in jean-fabric followed. The light pink top came into view and Daryl could see the lean, pale arms that seemed to have at least a little muscle in them before his eyes fall on the blonde tresses cascading down the back of the girl who was stepping into their view as she came to stand at the end of the stairs, next to Morgan, looking over at them, almost shyly.

Daryl's breath caught in his throat and he wondered if he had gone crazy or if it was just another dream.

His ears were suddenly ringing, but he heard someone cry out and he immediately knows that it was Maggie. The woman in question stood from the couch and took a step forward, but she didn't get any further before she fell into unconsciousness, her husband barely having time to catch her.

Daryl stepped away from the wall he had been leaning against and stared open mouthed at the girl who suddenly looked frightened. Her blue eyes flickered across their faces before she turned her head toward Morgan, who looked confused at what was happening before him.

It seemed like the silence has been stretched out for years before Rick finally took a step forward and spoke. "Beth?" His voice was as shaky as Daryl felt, because he couldn't believe his eyes.

Beth was standing in front of him and he wasn't the only one who was seeing her, so it couldn't be a dream.

Beth was standing next to Morgan,  _ alive _ and  _ breathing _ .

There were two scars on her face and Daryl recalled the marks he had seen on her face in the hospital right before she had been  _ killed _ in front of him.

But she hadn't been killed, because she was standing in front of him now.

"How is this possible?" Carol asked, breaking down into tears as she rushed over to the blonde who looked taken aback as the older woman embraced her, peppering kisses all over the younger girl's forehead while cupping her cheeks. Carol's body wracked with sobs and Daryl couldn't exactly blame her because he felt like crying himself.

Finally, Beth pushed Carol away slightly and frowned at her.

Daryl knew what was coming, because he couldn't very well be  _ that damn lucky _ to have this girl back in his life again, after apparently cheating a most certain death. He braced himself for it as he watched Beth take a tentative step back from Carol, looking confused and maybe even a little scared.

"Who are you?" Beth asked, her voice sounding hoarse, and Daryl's world immediately fell to pieces because of her, yet again.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was dark and cold when the girl's eyes finally fluttered open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey again! :) The response on this fic has been AMAZING you guys! Thank you so much for encouraging me to keep writing it! I know I said that I wouldn't post in about a week or so, but since I already had this chapter finished, I figured I might as well! ^^  
> Thank you to those of you who commented and to those who have bookmarked, subscribed and pressed the little kudos-button at the end! Please enjoy this little chapter that I hope will explain a little more of what Beth has been going through! ;)  
> Oh, and btw, so that you aren't confused: this chapter starts seven months prior and works its way to the day that she is reunited with her family! Not a lot of Bethyl there yet, but we'll get to it soon enough...I think... It's a slow burn process! ^^

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 2

_Seven months ago_

It was dark and cold when the girl's eyes finally fluttered open.

At first, she didn't move much, because her body felt as if it had been frozen over. She tried to recall what had happened to her and how she had gotten to the place that she was in, but when she tried to think back, there was a black veil covering her vision and the only thing she remembered was a sound; the sound of a gun being fired.

Painfully, she lifted her right hand, but winced when she felt a sting inside of it.

_Was she injured?_

She tried to open her eyes again, but was yet again met with complete darkness. When she took a breath, she suddenly became aware of how difficult it was to breathe and panic began setting in as she lifted her left hand instead and came in contact with nothing but hard wood.

She was breathing a lot heavier suddenly and her head was pounding as she tried to sit up, but there was too little room to actually do so. Opening her mouth, she tried to scream for help, but no words came out. She coughed and pounded on the wood, feeling it move a little above her. She scraped against it, feeling her fingernails chip and blood run down her hands as she tried her hardest to claw herself out of her confinement.

Out of her coffin.

When she realized that she had been buried alive, a small part of her told her to try to calm down and assess the situation the best she could in the darkness. She had no way of knowing just how long she had been caught inside of the casket, but since the air was still breathable, it couldn't have been _that_ long.

Unless of course her body had shut itself down to heal from whatever injury she had gotten that had made people believe that she was dead that is, but even she knew that it couldn't have shut off the need for oxygen.

Perhaps she was suffering from brain damage already? Maybe that was why she couldn't talk?

But how was she able to _think_ then?

It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered in that moment was that she had to get out of the grave she had woken up inside of.

Some kind of instinct took over and the girl managed to wiggle out of the sweater she was wearing, slowly pressing it against her mouth with her _clearly_ already injured, right hand. She pushed lightly against the wood again with her left hand and tried to wiggle her legs up so that her knees were touching her stomach, her feet planted on the roof of the casket.

Whoever it was that had buried her had wanted her body to be comfortable despite the fact that they had thought that she was dead. She figured this because the casket was a little bigger than her, which she had only noticed after calming herself down after the initial shock of being buried alive had settled.

She pushed her legs up while simultaneously pressing against the lid with her good hand. She could feel it moving up a little and she heard small pebbles and bits of dirt fall into the coffin. As she pushed and pushed, she tried to make as much noise as possible, hoping that someone would be walking by and hear her.

The lid moved again and she pushed even harder, the adrenaline finally kicking in. She got the casket open, just enough so that she could stick out her left hand, using her legs to keep the small opening intact so that she could try to dig out more space for herself.

Her legs started slipping, but she pushed her right hand up, ignoring the pain in it as she pushed the lid up again, securing her legs against it once again. She continued digging upwards, trying to get more room for the lid to move so that she would be able to climb out of there, but it was taking too long.

Her lungs were screaming in protest due to the lack of oxygen, put she kept digging and eventually, the lid lifted a little bit more. She breathed heavily, but thanks to the fact that she had her mouth covered, she could calm herself more efficiently, thus calm her own breathing as she focused on trying to get out.

She dug and she dug and she honestly doesn't even remember how she managed it, but after a while, there was enough room for her to wiggle the upper half of her body out of the coffin. She kept digging upwards and she used both of her hands now, the lid still painfully digging into her hips since her legs were still inside of the coffin. Somehow, she managed to move upward, slipping more and more out of the grave, closer to the fresh air.

She could almost feel it on her fingertips, and she tried once again to make a noise, but there was no place to move, much less for her to get a good enough breath to finally scream like she had wanted to do since she had woken up.

Finally, a miracle, as her index finger moved across the final layer of soil and she touched coldness. She wiggled her fingers and tried to get a grip of anything that would help her haul herself up. Grasping some tufts of grass, she continued her climb, which honestly felt a lot longer than six feet and just as she started feeling her muscles give in, she got her head out of the ground and breathed fresh air for the first time since who knows how long.

* * *

The girl laid on the ground, breathing heavily, muscles screaming in protest at every move she made. She pulled away the sweater she had been pressing to her mouth and inhaled sharply through her nose, letting out a strangled giggle into the cold night air.

 _I made it_ , she thought to herself and briefly, that black veil that had been in front of her eyes when she had woken up lifted. She saw herself, screaming at someone, blaming them for thinking of her as another dead girl, telling the person that she had made it, against all odds.

_Oh, the irony._

As quickly as the flash had come, it disappeared and the girl was left with more questions than she had answers, but she decided that she could dwell on that later, after she got herself to safety somehow.

She looked around, not recognizing anything around her and she sat up when she heard some muffled sounds somewhere behind her.

Quickly, she scrambled to her feet upon seeing two people stagger out of the woods, coming toward her slowly. Squinting her eyes, she tried to make them out better, but there was no way to see through the darkness, despite the moon shining above her.

She took a step toward them, but staggered, her exhaustion getting the better of her. She held up her hand toward them, hoping that they could help her somehow, but chills rose on her arms when she realized that they were moaning and hissing at her instead of trying to speak to her.

As they came closer, she realized with horror that the man's head was hanging at a strange angle and the woman's clothes were both ripped and bloodied. Their eyes were hollow and they moved toward her with their hands stretched out in front of them, clearly wanting to grasp her.

She scrambled back, tripping over her own feet, desperately trying to get away from them, but they moved in quicker.

It all happened so fast.

One second, the man, or whatever he was, loomed over her, mouth open as he tried to take a bite out of her arm, and the next, someone had thrown an axe and embedded it inside of his head and the monster had fallen limp on top of her.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw another man move in, embedding a small knife into the temple of the woman, making her fall limp to the ground. The man turned toward the girl, dagger still in hand as he stalked over to her, raising it above his head.

The girl panicked, raising her hands in the air and a moment later, the man's eyes seemed to soften as he watched her. She was breathing heavily, not knowing what to expect next and finally, the man pulled the monster that was still on top of her off of her body.

“You all right, Kid?” the man gruffly asked. The girl opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out yet again. Instead, she shook her head a firm 'no', making the man raise an eyebrow at her. “Are you a mute or something?”

The girl's only reply was to shrug and put her hand on her throat. She trailed her fingers there for a moment, finally feeling something a little off to the side, underneath her chin. Tracing the puckered skin, she pointed at it and the man moved a little closer, squinting his eyes as if to see better in the darkness.

“You've got yourself a scar there,” he told her. “Or at least one in the making. The wound seems to have been closed and it's healing. Looks like a gunshot wound.”

The girl felt her body tremble, feeling both exhaustion and fear take over. She blinked a few times, willing the black spots that appeared in her vision away, but in the end, it was of no use, because the world faded into nothingness.

* * *

Morgan had been making his way toward Washington DC when he had heard the familiar sounds of the wandering dead.

At first, he had listened to try and pinpoint how many of them there was, but when he realized there were only two, he decided that they weren't even worth dealing with. Then he had heard how their growls picked up and he had realized that they must have found something to attack. If it was an animal, he could capture it himself and then eat it, so he decided to follow the sounds.

When he had come out in the small clearing, he had seen the two walkers attack the poor girl, who didn't even seem to know what she was doing and Morgan reacted quickly, disposing of the two dead ones before turning to the girl, prepared to kill her too if she had been bitten.

He had seen the fear in her eyes and looked her over once, seeing no blood whatsoever on her body. Instead, he noticed the cuts on her cheek and forehead and the way she was covered in dirt. His eyes traveled behind her and he saw the place in the ground where the soil had been freshly dug up and instantly realized that the girl must have climbed out of her own grave.

She didn't speak when he addressed her, but it seemed like she at least understood him. When the girl tilted her chin up, he saw the marks of another wound that someone had stitched together, despite clearly thinking that she had been dead.

That someone must have really cared about her, if they had bothered to put clean clothes on her body and stitch her up before they buried her. But the girl was alive and breathing, so how had they not noticed that she hadn't been dead before they had tried to put her body at rest?

The girl fainted and Morgan watched her helplessly, wondering what he should do.

He had been on his way to DC, following in the steps of Rick Grimes, but it was taking him a while considering that he was on foot. Finding this girl like this, he knew that he couldn't just leave her in the clearing because that would most certainly end with her becoming walker food. Although, she was injured too, so he was aware of the risk it would probably bring if he took her with him since she would most likely just slow him down.

Still, he couldn't just leave her.

Morgan groaned at himself, looking around the clearing before looking down at the unconscious girl again. She couldn't be older than seventeen, from what he could see. What would it say about him if he just left her behind?

He recalled seeing a small cabin about a mile back and when he looked her over again, he made his decision.

Securing the knife into his belt, he gently lifted the girl so that he wouldn't by any chance injure her more. He began walking back the path that he had come from, making the decision to at least give the kid a chance to survive.

If she did, he might even take her with him.

* * *

The girl didn't come to until half a day later.

She had been exhausted and gravely injured still and after the adrenaline had worn off, she could feel the pain all over her body.

“Hey, lil' Lady,” the man who had saved her said and she looked up at him from the small cot she was laying in. She didn't recognize her surroundings and for a moment she panicked, wanting to sit up, but the man gently pushed her back on the bed. “Whoa there. You have to rest,” he told her. “I noticed that your wrist was hurt so I bandaged it up again and I've cleaned the cuts on your face and your fingers.”

The girl touched the wound on her cheek and stared at him with wide eyes as she looked down at her chipped nails that were now clean of the blood that had spilled when she had tried to scratch her way out of her grave. She wanted to thank him, but no words came out of her mouth yet again. It was frustrating because somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that she was able to speak, but still, the words refused to form, no matter how hard she tried.

“I think you might have hurt your vocal cords when you were shot,” the man said. “I suggest you don't try to speak for a while and maybe they'll recover on their own.” He shrugged, clearly not knowing for sure if she would ever be able to recover and get her voice back, but the girl didn't want to dwell on it until it actually became a problem.

She managed to make a noise in the back of her throat that sounded like a groan and the man looked up at her. Reaching for his hand, she took it and gently squeezed, nodding once to show him her gratitude.

“No biggie,” the man replied, a small smile playing on his lips. “Wouldn't have been right to just leave you there. Name's Morgan, by the way,” he added, almost thoughtfully.

 _Morgan_ , she though, committing the name to her memory. He had saved her life twice now; once from those people who had attacked her and a second time by not leaving her in the woods.

“You're weak, lil' Lady,” Morgan told her after a moment. “I was on my way to DC when I came across you. Pure luck that I found you, I tell you. Would have been dead for sure if I hadn't stepped in.” He watched her quietly for another moment before reaching over to grab a flask. He held it up for her to take, “Water?”

She nodded gratefully and immediately gulped down some of it, almost choking as she did. He gently patted her back as she coughed and shook his head at her, “I suppose you have a name, even if you can't say it right now, don't you?”

The girl watched him and finally shrugged. He narrowed his eyes at her. “Do you have a name?” he repeated, but the girl could only shrug again.

She tried to remember, she really did, but no name came to her mind.

“Don't you remember your name?” Morgan asked and the girl shook her head as a reply. “Do you remember anything before waking up in that grave?”

Yet again, she shook her head.

Morgan sighed exasperatedly, running a hand over his bald head, “I guess I'll just keep calling you lil' Lady then. That okay, kid?”

The girl nodded, looking at him questionably. She patted the cot she was laying in and looked around the cabin before moving her eyes back to him.

“You want to know if we're gonna be staying here?” Morgan clarified, the girl nodding. “I figured I might as well help you get better. I have all the time in the world considering that the world has gone to shit since dead have started walking and all that...” he trailed off when he saw the fear in the girl's eyes. “You don't remember the turn?”

The girl only stared at him, knowing that that would be answer enough. Morgan sighed again and then began explaining to her what had been going on in the world for a few years now.

When he was done with his story, he pointed at the scars on her face, “That's a sign that you must have been a fighter, Lady. You dug yourself out of that grave with all the injuries you have and that is the only reason that I stayed here.” The girl shot him another questioning look. “You have the will to fight and live inside of you. Even if you don't remember who you were, you made it out and if you get strong enough after I help you heal, I might even take you with me to DC. If you'd like that, that is?”

The girl nodded immediately, knowing that she wouldn't be able to make it in this new world alone, even if she had survived her own supposed death. She wondered if she had had a family before, if they had been the ones to bury her. Morgan had told her how someone had stitched up both the back of her head and the place where the bullet had entered and how he assumed that her body had given itself time to recover by itself, lowering her heart rate enough so that the people she had been with assumed that she was dead.

It hurt to think that everyone she might have once known thought that she was dead, but there was no way of going back.

Now all she had was Morgan, and she intended to stick with him until she died for real.

* * *

Two months passed and they walked from one small town to another. The girl's throat began feeling better about a month after she had woken up, but her other injuries were still there. Morgan still made the decision that they needed to start moving if they were going to get to DC any time in the near future, so they had started walking.

The weather had gotten colder and Morgan had given the girl his own jacket, acquiring another one for himself. The girl had wanted to laugh when she realized that they were matching, but since she still couldn't make a sound without sounding as if she was choking, she had just pointed between the two of them and turned her lips up in a smile.

Morgan had only stared at her for a moment and turned around, but the girl could have sworn that she had seen the corner of his mouth twitching.

* * *

It was three months after she had woken up again that she spoke for the first time.

She and Morgan had gone into a small store when suddenly loud banging could be heard from the main door. Eleven walkers stood outside, trying to get in to get to them and the girl looked over at Morgan. He seemed calm enough at first, but when he realized that there was no backdoor, he too began to look a little worried.

They tried to barricade the door, but it was of no use, because when the first walker broke through, the others quickly followed.

The girl had no experience in killing the things so far, because usually it was only one or two that crossed their path and Morgan took care of them since she was still injured.

Morgan pushed her behind him, protecting her the best he could as he started taking down the walkers one by one, but they were too many for him to handle alone. She reacted purely on instinct when she took out the knife that Morgan had gifted her and stabbed one of the walkers that had been close to biting Morgan straight through its temple.

Morgan looked at her shocked for only a moment when she kicked back one of the walkers to earn them more time and then killed two more easily. Soon, the dead ones had been dealt with and the girl dropped her knife, panting as she turned to look at Morgan.

“Where the hell did you learn to fight like that, lil' Lady?” Morgan wondered and she shrugged. “Are you okay?” he asked concerned, putting his hand on her shoulder as she tried to catch her breath.

The fight had exhausted her and her head hurt a little, but she was fine. The black veil that seemed to stand between her and her memories fluttered slightly and for a moment, she saw herself holding a gun, shooting at walkers as they swarmed whatever place it had been that she had once lived in.

“Yes,” she rasped as a reply and then her eyes widened when she realized that she had spoken. She grinned at Morgan who was finally smiling at her and she opened her mouth again, “Yes, I'm fine.”

Her voice sounded almost robotic considering how hoarse it was, but Morgan laughed, telling her that it would hopefully get back to normal sooner or later. After all, she had suffered from a grave injury and it took time to recover from a gunshot wound like that, especially considering that they had no real medication that could help her progress along.

“Don't strain yourself, Lady,” Morgan told her. “Talk only when it's necessary, but it sure is nice to hear your voice.”

They grabbed some cans of food that they figured could be good enough to eat and then walked out of the store together. Morgan put his hand on her shoulder blade, gently pushing her along.

“Now, if you don't mind, I've decided that we can work a little on improving your fighting technique even more,” he told her, making her smile.

* * *

A month later, they sit next to each other around the small fire she had built them. Morgan had watched her intently as she had gathered the sticks and set them on fire, using a small mirror she had found alone the way.

It seemed that he had been right about her, because some of the things she did, normal girls shouldn't know unless they had become accustomed to surviving in this new world that they lived in. Whoever it was that she had been with before, had taught her things to survive and even though she couldn't remember much about her personal life, it seemed like her brain had allowed her to at least keep her knowledge.

They were watching the small flame together, keeping quiet in case any walkers were wandering the woods around them when the girl found herself getting lost in her own thoughts.

 _Beth_.

She frowned at herself and the name that had suddenly popped up in her brain, repeating it once again in her thoughts. Soon enough, her own voice changed into a deeper one.

A man was yelling the name, over and over again.

She closed her eyes, trying to focus; trying to recognize the voice that she knew she _should_ recognize.

A flash of something, pain in the back of her head. She opened her eyes a little and saw the silhouette of a man running after her.

_Beth! Beth! Beth!_

“Lady!”

The girl jumped, startled out of the dream that had seemed more like a memory. She stared at Morgan, who was looking at her worriedly.

“You okay?” he asked and she realized that she was breathing heavily.

“Beth,” she mumbled, more to herself than as a reply to him.

“What?”

“Beth,” she repeated, this time a little louder as she brushed away a stray piece of blonde hair that had fallen over her eyes when Morgan had shaken her awake. “I think my name is Beth.”

Morgan watched her intently, “You remembered?”

“I remembered my name,” she clarified. “And a man, calling after me. Nothing else.”

Her voice was stronger than it had been before, but there was still a rasp there.

“Beth,” Morgan said, deep in thought. “Maybe it's coming back to you, kid? Maybe you'll start remembering more and more?”

Beth shrugged, “I don't know.”

“Well, I'll still call you lil' Lady, if that's fine with you?” Morgan raised his eyebrow. “Feels weird to call you anything but that.”

Beth laughed, and for the first time in God knows how long, it sounded like a real laugh.

She had a name now and maybe, just maybe, she would remember again.

* * *

They found the farm a week later and they decide to stay there a little while, since the winter was harsh.

Morgan repaired some of the fences and Beth did her best to help put up warning bells in case any walkers wander by, but the farm was in a quite remote place and for some reason, it seemed like almost no walkers came around those parts.

They didn't get too comfortable at first, knowing that they would eventually have to move on, but there was something inside of Beth, some kind of itchy feeling that she just couldn't seem to let go of, that made her want to stick around.

One evening when they are eating dinner; a rabbit that Beth somehow caught when she went tracking in the woods nearby, (Morgan doesn't ask anymore where she learned to set traps and track, because it's clear that she doesn't remember.) Beth decided to speak her mind.

“I don't want to go to DC,” she told Morgan, who looked up from the book Beth had forced him to read, telling him that he needed a distraction from the crazy world they were living in. “I wanna stay here.”

Morgan swallowed down the bite he had in his mouth and lowered his fork to the table, closing the book as he looked at her. “How come?” he asked.

“I don't know,” Beth shrugged. “I just feel like this is a good place to stop.”

“The people I've been following are heading to DC, Beth,” Morgan sighed, saying her name, which usually meant that he was tired and wanted her to see his way and agree with him.

But Beth didn't back down.

“And what do you think we'll find in DC?” she inquired. “More walkers, more death and more despair. This place seems safe enough and maybe we can actually live here for a while, or maybe even permanently.”

“Why do you think that?” Morgan frowned. “Because no walker herd has passed us so far? We're not safe anywhere, Beth!”

The blonde only shook her head, “It's not that, Morgan. I just have a feelin' about this place. I think it can be good.”

“Is that so...” Morgan trailed off, not looking convinced at all.

“Look,” Beth sighed, “I've been havin' dreams lately, about a farmhouse similar to this one. I think I might have lived on a farm once and I think it's good for me to stay here. Maybe I'll remember again if I do.”

“So you want to stay because you think you _might_ remember something else?” Morgan snorted. “It's too much of a long shot, kid.”

“You can leave,” Beth finally said, still determined not to back down. “I'm thankful for your help and everything you've done for me, but I really can't keep going anymore. I need this place, Morgan.” Her voice broke and she cleared her throat, feeling how sore it was getting. If she talked too much, it would usually strain and hurt like it had done a couple of months ago when she hadn't been able to speak at all and Beth didn't want to risk losing her voice again. “I need to have hope that I'll remember somethin' again, Morgan. I need somethin' to hold onto and I think I can find that here,” she told him.

Morgan watched her for what felt like a million years before reaching into his pocket. He took out a bracelet with white beads, a metallic cross that had darkened slightly hanging off of it. He put it on the table, motioning for her to take it.

Tentatively, she reached for it and took it in her hand.

“You hold onto that,” he told her, standing up from the table as he started putting away the dishes. Beth could only watch him and wonder what he had meant.

Hold on to her faith?

Hold on to hope?

“What are you going to do?” Beth finally asked and Morgan shrugged.

“I'm not leaving you behind, Lady,” he said, a crooked grin on his face. “If you think that we can have a life here and that it'll be good for you to stay here, I'm staying too. DC can screw itself for all that I care; everyone's probably dead anyway.”

“You don't know that, Morgan,” Beth said thoughtfully, already regretting that she had put the thought in his head. “Who knows? Maybe you'll cross paths with them again? Miracles do happen.” She put the bracelet on and it wrapped around her left wrist nicely. The scar that she had there, possibly from a suicide attempt, was visible, but it felt good to have that cross hanging off that particular wrist.

It was another reminder that she was a survivor and now, the cross was there to remind her to hold on, like Morgan had told her to do.

* * *

Months passed yet again and Beth was upstairs in her small bedroom, alone for the first time in a week.

She and Morgan had gotten so accustomed to each other, that they didn't even need to speak anymore, which Beth was a little thankful for to be honest, since it meant that she could save her voice for rainy days.

Winter had passed, but every now and then the wind would still pick up cold, since it still wasn't spring. Morgan had found an old pickup-truck a month ago and he had used that one to travel around on the roads, scavenging anything that they could use.

Together, they had gotten the farm cleaned up nicely and Beth had personalized her bedroom with the things that she had found and brought back during one of her many trips with Morgan. She liked staying back mostly though, when Morgan went out. She liked the peace and quiet and it gave her a moment to think.

No memories had come back to her yet, but sometimes, at night, she would dream about faceless people who talked to her. She would never see their faces and their voices sounded blended together, but she knew that they had once been a part of her life; now, a part of her past.

Morgan had been away the entire day and Beth had saved him a portion of squirrel stew that she had made with the critters that she had caught during the day.

Beth was laying in her bed when she heard the old pickup-truck pull up outside, but she was surprised to hear more than one engine. Frowning, she stood up from her bed, leaving the small journal that she kept as she tried to sort out the things she remembered and the things she knew, trying to make a time line of what exactly had happened to her before she met Morgan. She walked over to the window and looked outside and saw some shadows moving toward the house.

She panicked at first, wondering if Morgan had been attacked and forced to take the people there, but when she heard the door unlock and Morgan call out to her that everything was fine, she calmed down a bit, smoothing out her shirt before slowly making her way down the stairs.

When she finally stepped out and looked at the people in the living room, she only had a moment to prepare for what happened next.

One of the younger women, who still looked a little older than Beth herself, cried out, almost painfully as she stood from the sofa. She began moving toward Beth, but her eyes rolled back into her head and she fell over before she had the chance to take any more steps in her direction. Beth could only stare as the man who had been next to her– _the Asian_ , Beth noted as she cataloged all of them in her mind– reached for the woman and caught her just in time before her head connected with the floor. The other people in the room seemed just as shaken for some reason and Beth looked worriedly at Morgan who seemed to be just as clueless as her as to what was going on.

The man with the long beard took a step forward and whispered in a broken voice, “Beth?”

Beth's eyes flickered over them and out of the corner of her eye, she saw the man who had been leaning against the wall for support was now staring at her with wide eyes, just as all the others were too.

Beth swallowed thickly when the woman, who seemed to be the oldest female in the group, practically ran up to her and embraced her with all her might. The woman peppered Beth's face with kisses, squeezing her, muttering and whispering things like “You're alive, I can't believe it!” while Beth remained frozen in her spot.

Her mind was going a thousand miles an hour as she tried to make sense of what was happening. Beth wasn't stupid, so it didn't take long for her to realize that these people had _obviously_ known her before, once upon a time. She tried to recognize them or remember them, but she just _couldn't_ and it only served to make her even more frustrated.

She pushed the woman away from herself gently and gave her a puzzled look, pushing the fear she suddenly felt away, “Who are you?”

The woman blinked a couple of times, but remained in her place in front of Beth. Her chin trembled and she let out a gut-wrenching sob, her entire frame shaking as she took a step back from Beth, turning around to face her group again. Beth looked at them as well, but they seemed just as shaken as they had been a moment ago, and now, they looked absolutely _miserable_ as well.

The man who had been leaning against the wall looked down at the floor and Beth noticed that his hands was shaking. She resisted the urge she felt to take a step toward him to give him some kind of comfort, because no matter if she had known these people once, she didn't know them now.

Her eyes moved back to the woman who had fainted, who was now being placed on the couch, looking a little pale and for some reason, her heart seemed to ache for her too.

“She doesn't remember,” the older woman sobbed into the shoulder of the man with the beard, who seemed to have his own tears flowing from his eyes.

Beth felt guilty and scared as she took the group in as a whole again, and yet, somewhere in the back of her mind, that black veil fluttered slightly as she recognized the woman's voice as one of the shadows who had been haunting her dreams.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments are always appreciated! :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is shocked to have found Beth alive, but horrified to find out that she doesn't remember them. Beth doesn't know how to act with the newcomers, but when she sees one of them, she tries to be as welcoming as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people!  
> Thank you so much to everyone who has commented on this fic so far! It's very much appreciated and I love all of you! Now that I've finished my final exam, I can finally focus a bit on my writing- so expect more chapters to come! ;)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 3

Daryl kept looking at the floor even after Carol had spoken what they had all already understood.

Beth was alive, yes, but she didn't remember them.

Internally, Daryl cursed everything and everyone who had had a part in creating this cruel world where he had somehow miraculously gotten the blonde back into his life, and yet still lost her.

Carol stepped away from Rick's embrace and walked over to Daryl instead, flinging her arms around his middle. He held her closely, way past the awkwardness that had been there in the beginning of their friendship, as she cried into his chest and he decided that he needed to remain strong for her and the others.

He looked over at Rick, who wiped his face, probably from shedding tears of his own and Daryl congratulated himself on managing to keep it together. His eyes fell on Beth again, who was shifting nervously from one foot to the other, looking at them all, her eyes filled with both worry and guilt.

“Guys, we need to check on Maggie,” Glenn suddenly spoke from where he was kneeling next to his wife, who was still laying unconscious on the couch.

Daryl didn't blame Maggie for reacting the way she had. Honestly, he felt like he needed to lay down himself.

“We have to try to get her to wake up,” Sasha said, her voice sounding thick and Daryl noticed that she too had tears in her eyes.

“Uh, I can get her some water,” a soft voice spoke and Daryl closed his eyes, looking down again. Hearing Beth's voice, no matter how raspy in sounded, was like music to his ears. His heart was beating hard in his chest and he had to hold Carol a little tighter, willing himself not to break down in front of everyone.

“Yeah,” Morgan said, looking down at Beth still looked a little unsure. “You get her some water, lil' Lady.”

Daryl looked up just in time to see Beth pass by him, out into the other room where the kitchen obviously was. As she walked by him, their eyes connected and he heard himself let out a breath upon seeing her beautiful, blue eyes, awake and alive. A pink tint appeared on Beth's cheeks as she walked off and Daryl felt something strange bubble inside of him that he didn't want to think about at the moment, with so many questions roaming inside of his mind.

“How do you know Beth?” Morgan asked once the blonde wasn't in the room anymore. He was looking at Rick, clearly as shocked as them because of this unexpected turn of events.

“She's a part of our family,” Rick replied, his voice still thick with emotion.

Morgan nodded thoughtfully as Beth hurried back into the room, a glass filled with water and a clean rag in her hands. She hesitantly walked over to Glenn and offered the items to him, which he took, his breath catching in his throat as their fingers brushed.

Daryl wondered then what if felt like to touch her.

Glenn had clearly yet again been taken aback by the fact that his sister-in-law was actually alive and for a moment, he only stared at Beth with wide eyes, not doing anything to try and rouse Maggie. Carol took a step away from Daryl and walked over to Glenn, putting her hand on his shoulder while easing the rag from his grip.

“I've got this,” she mumbled, her eyes flickering from Maggie, to Beth and back to Maggie again. Glenn swallowed and nodded, standing up and walking to stand behind the couch, running a hand through his dark hair.

“We clearly need to talk,” Morgan said, breaking the silence that had once again fallen upon them. He motioned for Beth to come to him and Daryl was surprised when the blonde hurried to his side, looking nervous as ever. “Why don't you go upstairs and get some rest, lil' Lady? You've had enough excitement for tonight and Rick and I need to have a conversation.”

Beth nodded, and Daryl couldn't help but notice the relief on her face at being excused. He couldn't even begin to fathom what she must be feeling, but he was pretty sure that confusion was the biggest one of the emotions on that list.

“Okay,” Beth replied, beginning to move toward the stairs.

“No, wait!” Carl suddenly explained and Daryl's eyes snapped to the young boy who he had just now noticed had been awake all this time. “Please stay, Beth. Please?”

Just as everyone else, the boy had tears in his eyes upon seeing Beth and for the first time in so long, Daryl saw the child inside of Carl that had been lost ever since his friend had been killed.

Beth looked at Carl with uncertain eyes, shifting from one foot to the other. It was evident that she didn't know what to do in this situation. She wanted to get away from them, Daryl noted, mostly because she didn't know them and until they all decided on how to deal with her memory loss, he wanted her out of there too; if only to protect her from having a mental break down.

“What's your name?” Beth wondered, finally facing Carl.

“Carl,” the boy choked out, a tear slipping from his eye.

A look of sympathy appeared on Beth's face and she nodded slowly, “How 'bout I show you to one of the rooms, so that you can get some rest, Carl? I'm guessin' that you're tired after travelin' for so long.”

Daryl's chest tightened a little, because in that second, he saw the old Beth Greene; the one who cared about Carl and Judith as if they had been her own. Her eyes flickered over to him and he realized that he must have let out a sigh or something to draw her attention, but then, he noticed that no one else had looked at him, which meant that Beth must have felt the urge to look at him all by herself.

Their eyes met yet again and momentarily, everything that had been wrong these past seven months faded away, and all he could see was Beth.

The moment passed quickly though, when Beth broke eye contact with him to look over at Rick, who had agreed that Carl should head off to sleep along with Judith.

“I'll show you guys to the bedrooms,” Beth said, beckoning Carl forward with her hand. The boy didn't even hesitate as he walked up to her and took her hand. Beth smiled lightly at him and Daryl watched as Michonne rose and walked over with a sleeping Judith in her hands.

“Do you mind if I come with you and put the baby to bed too?” Michonne asked Beth, who looked wary, but finally shook her head.

“Not at all,” she replied, giving Michonne a crooked smile. “I think I actually found an old crib in one of the rooms when Morgan and I cleaned it up, but we put it in the closet upstairs. Maybe you could use that for...” she trailed off, looking at the sleeping baby in Michonne's arms.

“Judith,” Michonne filled in and Beth once again nodded.

“You can just follow me, I guess,” she said, sending one last glance toward the other people in the room before walking upstairs, pulling Carl with her. Michonne turned and gave Rick a small nod before following the petite blonde up the stairs and out of their view.

It was a little easier to breathe now that Beth wasn't there anymore. Daryl had been in such a shock that he seemed to have forgotten how to work his lungs properly, but now, he was craving a cigarette to calm himself and to clear his head. His fingers itched to reach for the pack he had in his back pocket, but he knew he needed to stick around for the conversation with Morgan.

“Abraham,” Rick said, turning around to face the man who stood stoically in the other corner of the room. “Do you mind taking Glenn and Tyreese with you to bring our things inside?”

“Not at all,” Abraham replied. “Just tell me where to put the stuff when we get in.”

Rick nodded, turning to Tara, “Can you take Rosita and Eugene upstairs and look how many rooms are available and set up some sort of sleeping arrangements?”

“You think there's enough room for all of us?” Rosita inquired, a frown on her face.

“There are enough rooms,” Morgan told them. “The farmhouse is big. Probably belonged to one of the richer families. Not that the money did them any good in the end...”

Daryl resisted the urge to snort, recalling that time that he and Beth had set fire to the moonshine shack using a wad of cash. Now the memory just felt a little bittersweet, knowing that he was the only one out of the two of them that actually remembered.

“I'll divide the rooms fairly for all of us,” Eugene said. “It's the least I can do.”

“I can help if anything needs cleaning up,” Father Gabriel said. “It's clear that we all need to come together at this happy time.”

“Happy time?” Daryl raised an eyebrow at him. “Ain't nothin' happy 'bout it. We buried the girl alive an' she had to claw her way outta her own grave.”

His statement made it all much more real and the guilt of what they had done suddenly washed over him. He couldn't imagine the fear Beth must have felt when she had woken up inside that coffin. Feeling horrible about it didn't do any good now though, and he knew that he would let himself think more on it later, when Morgan told them exactly how much they had missed in Beth's life since they buried her.

Carol and Sasha began tending to Maggie and Noah, who hadn't spoken a word since they had seen Beth, stuck around to assist them while the others moved on to their own tasks that had been appointed to them.

“Let's go to the kitchen,” Morgan suggested to Rick, who gave him a curt nod. As he passed Daryl, he motioned for him to follow and Daryl didn't even hesitate to go after them.

They sat down around the small dinner table, Rick and Daryl in front of Morgan, who clasped his hands together and put them on the table.

“Where do we even begin?” Rick asked, burying his head in his hands as he let out a sigh. “How the hell is she alive?”

Daryl looked over at Morgan, expecting him to have the answer to the question that he had been asking himself ever since he had laid eyes on Beth tonight, but the older man simply shrugged.

“You tell me,” he said. “I found her after she had somehow dug herself out of her grave. Two walkers had her cornered and she didn't know what the hell she was doing, much less what they were.”

“Was she awake when ya found her?” Daryl questioned, making Morgan look over at him.

“You dense or somethin'?” Morgan frowned. “I just told you that the girl had dug herself out of her own grave. Of course she was awake. But she was also exhausted and heavily injured.”

Daryl shot the man a glare, “She say anythin' to ya?”

“She fainted from exhaustion, poor thing,” Morgan told them. “For a moment, I didn't know if I should take her with me. I was following in your steps, heading for DC,” he pointed at Rick.

“DC's a bust,” Daryl put in. “We were headin' there for a cure, but it was bullshit.”

“Beth said something similar,” Morgan smirked. “When she convinced me to stay here on the farm. She thought it looked familiar and that it might somehow jog her memories.”

“What _does_ she remember?” Daryl asked, desperately wanting to know. He was trying not to think of the possibility that Beth had somehow remembered the farm she had grown up on because he wasn't ready to get his hopes up; he would never be lucky like that.

Morgan seemed to hesitate, “Just her name. It took her months to remember that alone. Sometimes I think she remembers a thing or two, but she keeps it to herself. Probably just small fragments, but she sort of gets a little dazed when it happens. Her breathing picks up.”

Frustration settled over Daryl and he let out a harsh breath, running his fingers through his hair. “She doesn't remember anythin' about us? Her family?”

“Unfortunately not,” Morgan replied. “And before you ask, I have no idea how she survived either. I've seen the wound and concluded that the bullet somehow must've missed the important parts of her brain. The fact that you lot stitched her up saved her life, I think. Gave her body a chance to recover on its own.”

“Doesn' change the fact that we buried her alive,” Daryl muttered, more to himself than anything.

After he had carried the blonde he had thought to be dead out of the hospital, he hadn't let go of her until they had found the place that they wanted to put her to rest in. He had insisted that they sew together the head wound, both in the back and under her chin where the bullet had entered, if only so that the girl would look like the angel that she had been.

Tara and Rosita had taken the task of doing so, since it was a bit easier on them since they had never actually known her and when they helped clean her body up Daryl had gone out of his mind to look for a coffin, not wanting the girl to be buried without one. Maggie had just cried, day in and day out, until they finally buried her, Daryl digging the grave himself, not letting anyone else do it.

He had lowered Beth into that coffin.

He had been the one to close it for the final time, silently crying over her dead body and the smile that he would never be able to see again.

Everyone else had known that it was his way of dealing with things and they had allowed him to grieve, even with them present. They didn't leave her grave until two days later, when they decided that they needed to keep moving along and Daryl had looked back one last time, wishing that Beth was standing beside him, telling him to flip the world off for being wicked.

“I helped the lil' Lady to get back up on her feet,” Morgan continued, “and she helped me work my way back to sanity. I know I lost if for a while, Rick, but Beth gave me someone to take care of again. Gave me someone to protect.”

The older man glanced at Daryl for some reason, and suddenly, Daryl felt as if he was being inspected.

“Why do you keep callin' her that? Lil' Lady?” Rick wondered.

Morgan chuckled, “After all that and that's the question you're gonna ask? I told you she didn't know her own name and she couldn't even speak the first few months, so I called her that and I guess it just stuck.”

Daryl continued to stare at him, not knowing what to say. Instead, he placed his elbows on the table and covered his face with his hands. “I don' understand,” he finally admitted, his tone dripping with both confusion and frustration, “how is she alive?”

Daryl felt Rick put his hand on his back and he heard how Morgan stood up from his seat. Curious, Daryl looked up only to see Morgan take out a bottle of scotch from one of the cabinets, along with three glasses. He poured them each a drink and pushed it toward Daryl, looking hm in the eyes as he spoke, “Don't matter. She's alive and you should all just be thankful for that.”

Daryl looked over at Rick, who was eying the beverage, deep in thought. Even though he wanted to know how the girl had survived the wound that they had thought to be fatal, he knew that Morgan was right.

Beth was alive and that was all that mattered.

But was she really Beth if she didn't remember who she had once been?

From what Daryl had seen so far the girl reminded him of how she had been when they had been residing on the Greene Farm. She had been shy and awkward around them all before they had disposed of the walkers in the barn, and after that, she had been on the edge before she had made the decision to stay alive.

While they had been staying at the prison, Daryl had begun seeing another part of her. She had been more open to the others, bonding with both Michonne and Carol, forming some kind of mother-daughter relationship with the older woman and a strong friendship with the other. Sasha had taught her how to fire a rifle properly, but Beth had never believed in violence; only when it came to killing walkers did she think differently.

The first time he had noticed just how much she had grown up since they had first met, was around the time that she had gotten together with Zach. The boy had been falling head over heels in love with her, but Daryl had seen that Beth didn't allow herself to get too emotionally attached. At first he had thought that she was just playing hard to get, because that day when they had been going on a run, he had seen her kiss the younger man and flirt almost like a professional. He had buried the thoughts deep inside though and when he had come back to tell her that Zach had been killed, she had proven herself more mature than he had ever thought of her before.

Well, either mature, or very damaged.

He wasn't sure what behavior was supposed to be expected of them in the world they lived in now. If he were to travel back a few years, to the time before the turn, he was sure that all of them would be certified as crazy people.

Which brought the question: what was Beth now?

If she had woken up, not remembering that the dead were roaming the streets nowadays, without any memories of her past... Did that mean that she was the most sane one out of them all? That she was once again innocent and uncorrupted?

Daryl recalled the time the two of them had spent alone. Those few weeks they had spent in solitude, with only each other as company, had been life changing for Daryl. He hadn't even realized it until that night in the funeral home, that he had come across her playing the piano. She had looked so innocent, yet so grown up and his chest had filled with some kind of emotion that he had been completely unfamiliar with. The following night, he had basically admitted to her that she had changed his mind about people, but he hadn't had a chance to explain any further before the place had been swamped with walkers.

He had promised himself that the next time he saw Beth alive, he would tell her what he had wanted to say to her that night. The only problem was, that even he didn't know what it was.

When he thought about it, he knew that he had had words on the tip of his tongue, but in the blur that had followed, the words had been lost to him. Yet, he still swore that he would tell her, as soon as he figured it out for himself.

After they had buried her, he once again tried to force his mind into remembering, but the only thing that seemed to be recorded in his brain, was the image of Beth falling to the floor; dead before even hitting it.

He knew that he cared about her deeply, but he had a feeling that there was more to it as well. It was to late though, because the girl was gone and she would never hear him admit it, even if he only admitted it to himself.

Now, she was alive and he still had no clue what he had wanted to say to her that night during their last supper together.

It gnawed at him from the inside, but what would he be able to do now? She didn't even know him anymore, even though she had ended up becoming the person who knew him the best. It was all in the past now because he was a stranger. Once again, he had driven up on his motorcycle on the farm she resided in and she had no idea who he was or what he was capable of.

She had no idea what he would do for her.

And to be honest, Daryl didn't know if he should feel happy about that.

* * *

Beth led the woman with the sword up the stairs, dragging Carl along with her. The young boy didn't seem to be able to tear his eyes off of her and she wondered for a moment how they had known each other before she had been lost.

She refused to refer to herself as having died. Obviously, she understood that the had thought her to be dead, but she hadn't been, so why should she say that she had been?

“Carl,” she said thoughtfully, opening the door to the room opposite hers. “This is one of the smaller rooms with a single bed. If you'd like to, you can sleep in here.”

“I would like to sleep in the same room as Judy and Dad, if that's okay?” Carl requested, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks.

“Your father...?” Beth wondered, trailing off as she looked at the woman.

“Rick,” she told Beth. “The man that would be a perfect Santa Clause if his beard had been white.”

Beth couldn't help but grin at the comparison the woman had made, “I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name earlier...?”

“Michonne,” the woman introduced herself, still cradling the baby in her arms so she couldn't shake Beth's hand.

“Michonne,” Beth repeated, trying the name out, hoping that it might trigger a memory or something. The same wave of annoyance hit her when she realized that the veil was still there, not lifting the slightest at the name. “Do you want to sleep in the same room as them? The master bedroom has a pullout couch too, so you can probably all fit in there.”

“I'll talk to Rick and the others about the sleeping arrangements later,” Michonne replied.

“Don't be like that, Michonne,” Carl said, bumping her lightly with his shoulder. “Ya can sleep with us. Judith likes you.”

Michonne raised an eyebrow at the boy, who only grinned. “I thought you and I were best friends?” she asked him and Carl shrugged.

“If you teach me how to fight with that sword, we might be,” he bargained, but the woman only shook her head.

Beth watched their interactions and noted how easy and open their relationship seemed to be. She wondered if she had been that close to them once, and it hurt her to know that she might have been.

Out of all the people in the world, Morgan had to have come across the people who were supposedly her family; the people who he had no memory of, whatsoever. While she wanted to get to know them, she was afraid that she might learn something about herself that she wouldn't like.

The possibility of her being different from what they remembered was way too high and she was scared that if they got to know the person she had become these last seven months, they wouldn't like her, and leave her behind again.

A small voice in the back of her head tried to reassure her that the reactions she had seen tonight was proof enough that these people had cared about her, and that they still did, meaning that they wouldn't leave her behind again.

Although, she also knew that if they _did_ leave her, she would still have Morgan, who had stayed with her for seven months, even if he hadn't known her at all in the beginning.

“Beth?”

Carl's voice forced her out of her thoughts and Beth winced, feeling a head ache coming up.

“Yeah?” she asked, looking at him.

“The crib you mentioned earlier? Do you think it'll fit in the room?” the boy asked, making Beth snap into action. She walked into the master bedroom and pushed the couch all by herself to the far corner, leaving one corner open by the window, far from the door, open for the crib.

“I just need to get the crib,” Beth told them, already walking to the adjoining closet which had been big enough to fit the crib without a problem. She and Morgan had thrown out all the moth-eaten clothes that had been in there and Morgan had only kept the few things that he would be able to wear. Some clothes they had put in plastic bags that they had found downstairs and then put them downstairs in another closet that they barely used. Perhaps some of the clothes would fit these newcomers, so Beth reminded herself to take them out first thing tomorrow morning for them to look through.

“I'll help you,” Carl offered, but Beth quickly shook her head.

“It's fine.”

“But I want to help,” Carl insisted. “Don't strain yourself.”

“I said it's _fine_ ,” Beth said, the words coming out a little harsher than she had meant for them to. A surprised look covered Carl's face and Beth immediately knew that he wasn't used to her snapping at him like that.

Pushing down the guilt she felt, she walked over to the closet and pulled the crib out. The air around them felt awkward and Beth knew that she needed to change the conversation up a little. “So, Carl. Before, when we knew each other; were we friends?”

“Yeah,” Carl replied, looking happy to let the uncomfortable moment pass. “We were. Honestly, I had a small crush on you for a while, but you were nice about it,” he admitted, a blush once again dusting his cheeks.

“Oh?” Beth grinned, finding the young boy cute to admit something like that. “You're not still crushing on me, are you?” she said, trying to tease him a bit to test the waters.

Carl didn't seem bothered by it, which meant that she indeed  _had_ had a close friendship with him, once upon a time. “ Nah,” he drawled, shaking his head. “You became more of a big sister to me. You even yelled at me once when I disrespected my Mom...”

Beth saw the way Carl's smile immediately fell as he mentioned his mother. She glanced over at Michonne who shook her head, confirming what Beth already suspected.

“I'm sure your mother loved you very much,” Beth softly said, not knowing what else to say.

Carl only shrugged, “I guess. It's been almost two years now. She died when she gave birth to Judith, and I think her birthday is coming up in a few months.”

“We can throw Judith a party,” Beth told him. “And have a nice quiet dinner to remember your mother. Maybe it'll even bring back some of my memories.”

Carl looked over at Michonne for a moment before turning back to Beth, “That would be nice. We don't really celebrate birthdays anymore, but I think Judy would like it.”

Beth nodded, “Help me carry the crib.” She figured that she owed the boy the change of subject, noting that everything related to his mother was a painful subject. “Hey, do either of you know how old I am?” she wondered, looking at them expectantly as she got to changing the sheets on the beds.

“You should be around nineteen,” Carl told her. “Last time I saw you, you were eighteen, but that was before you were–”

“Shot?” Beth filled in the gap and Carl nodded. Both he and Michonne seemed to have questions, but Beth knew she had no real answers, only speculations that she had decided to leave behind. “I don't know how I survived,” she told them. Lifting her chin, she showed them the scar she now sported due to the gunshot that had made them believe that she was dead, “I woke up with this and no memories whatsoever. No clue to how I'm still alive, so don't bother asking or trying to figure it out.”

“You're here, Beth,” Michonne spoke after having been quiet for so long. Beth had a feeling that the woman didn't speak much in general. “That's all that matters.”

Beth gave her an appreciative nod before putting the final pillow inside the crib. Michonne lowered the baby, who was still sleeping soundly and for a moment, Beth itched to lift her up and cradle her.

_What strange urge_ , she thought, looking down at the sleeping child.

“I'll leave you guys to get ready,” she told them. “My room is the one down the hall, across from the small bedroom I showed you guys earlier. If you need anything, Morgan usually sleeps downstairs on the couch, but I'm here too.” She cleared her throat, feeling it strain a little and was happy to see that both Michonne and Carl nodded in understanding. “I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow then. Uh, good night.” She excused herself and started for the door, but there was one more question burning in her mind that she needed the answer to. “Michonne,” she said, turning back around in the doorway.

The woman looked up at her and silently asked what she needed. Beth took a deep breath, not knowing how to ask without sounding as if she was completely clueless; which she actually was in this case.

“That woman downstairs,” she said. “The one who fainted... Who is she?”

Michonne hesitated, clearly not knowing if she should tell Beth the truth. “Are you sure it's good for you to just get all the answers like this? It might be better if you feel around us first, maybe trigger your own memory?”

“Please, Michonne,” Beth said. “I did get a feeling about her, and even though I might not recognize her face or know her name, I need a place to start. I need something to go on and then I'll take one day at a time, I promise.”

“I just don't want you to damage your brain or something,” Michonne said. “I'm not sure how it even works considering that you were shot through it, but I suppose I can give you this.” She looked at Beth for another moment before saying, “The woman's name is Maggie. She's your sister.”

Beth inhaled sharply, staring at Michonne with wide eyes.

She had a sister.

_A sister_ .

A real, living blood relative– _that she didn't even remember_.

She swallowed thickly, “And the Asian guy? The one who caught her when she fell. He's...?”

“Her husband,” Michonne answered.

Beth could only nod, her mouth clamped shut as the thoughts inside of her head swirled around. She mumbled a thank you and a final good night before walking out of the room, closing the door behind her.  She walked straight over to her room, not looking back even once, breathing in and out to calm herself.

She felt horrible.

Horrible for not remembering, not knowing who they were; almost dying.

She wanted to know the details, but she knew she was far from ready to hear anything that they had to say. However, she had a good feeling about Michonne, who had been honest and told her that she didn't believe that Beth was ready to just hear it all, black and white, straight and honest. She needed time to heal mentally  _and_ physically, since her vocal cords were still healing and she got those massive head aches from time to time.

Then there was Maggie; her  _sister_ .

Beth  _wanted_ to get to know her, but she wasn't sure if Maggie would be ready to deal with her considering the state her mind was in. What if Maggie couldn't accept the fact that Beth no longer was the person she had once been? What if she didn't understand the pain and suffering that Beth went through as she recovered from her injuries?

What if she didn't understand that Beth was far from oka y, not taking her memory loss into the calculation?

Beth put on her pajamas; a pair of red flannel pants that Morgan had found her and a short-sleeved dark gray t-shirt with  an arrow on it. Morgan had found it funny after they had discovered that Beth apparently knew how to use a crossbow, when she had found a toy one that she had played around with around the house, releasing a bold straight into Morgan's glass of water that she had been aiming for. He had told her they would eventually try to find her a real one, but they were difficult to come by, so it had just never happened.

The man who had been leaning against the wall had a crossbow, Beth remembered. Maybe he had been the one who had taught her?

She laid down on her bed and curled under the covers, already feeling her exhaustion set in. Her room was one of the smaller ones at the end of the hallway, but she didn't mind because she found it quite cozy. It had a window that showed her the front lawn so that she would be able to spot any walkers coming by from afar, or any humans that might be a threat. It was effective and Beth loved every part of it.

Another positive thing with it being so small, was that no one else would be able to sleep there. There were plenty of rooms for the newcomers and Beth was glad that she would be able to keep her sanctuary. She needed privacy to deal with the turn of events and she needed sleep, because she was exhausted.

Closing her eyes, she tried to listen to what was going on downstairs, but it didn't take long for her dreams to consume her and for her to slip from the world, in a deep sleep.

* * *

“We get everythin' settled?” Daryl asked Glenn as he walked toward the living room again.

“Yeah, the rooms have been divided, so Abraham's gang and Tara will be staying downstairs with Sasha and Tyreese while the rest of us sleep upstairs,” Glenn explained. “Morgan prefers the couch here in the living room, so as soon as Maggie wakes up, she and I'll head upstairs.”

“Michonne an' Rick?” Daryl wondered, looking over at Rick who was catching up with Morgan, listening to the way Beth had clawed her way back to the surface and done the impossible by cheating death.

“Beth showed us to the master bedroom,” Michonne replied behind him, almost making him jump out of his shoes.

“Damn it, ya gotta show yourself 'fore ya scare the shit outta me,” Daryl glared, but Michonne's lips only quirked up.

“What's with you?” she wondered. “I figured you'd be over the moon by now.”

“Ya can't expect any of us to know how to deal with all of this,” Daryl shook his head. “I'm glad she's alive, but she don't know us. It's like she's still gone.”

Michonne contemplated him for a moment, “I just talked to her earlier. She seems a little different, but deep down, I could still see our Beth there. She just needs time... We all do.”

Daryl didn't know what to say to that, so he just shrugge d. He wanted to know what Beth and Michonne had talked about and he wanted to talk to Beth, but he didn't dare to do it yet. He didn't want to overwhelm her and he most certainly didn't want to overwhelm  _himself_ , which he knew he would be doing if he even chances a glance at her.

The few times their eyes had connected tonight, he felt that feeling again, that he just couldn't name. It felt as if years had passed since he had last seen her, but at the same time it felt as if no time had passed at all.

Everything he had felt before was still there and he knew that it wouldn't go away just because Beth had lost her memories.

The girl had gotten a second chance at life and all Daryl wanted for her was to be safe and happy. If he could only help her with one of those, he would give his life to keep her shielded from all the evils of the world. He would keep an eye on her, but only from a distance, because he didn't want to scare her away. If she ever decided to come to him, to get to know him all over again, he wouldn't refuse her, but he would not push her to do so either.

It needed to be her choice and whatever it turned out to be, he would respect it.

“Beth,” Maggie mumbled half-dazed from the couch. “Was it a dream? Please tell me it wasn't a dream.”

Glenn hurried over to his wife and took her hand, smiling down at her with tears in his eyes. “It wasn't a dream, Mags. Beth is here. She's  _alive_ !”

Maggie's lip trembled and tears sprung from her eyes again as she sat up and hugged Glenn tightly.  The older Greene sibling looked at him from over Glenn's shoulder and smiled, happiness and relief all over her face.

Daryl knew that someone needed to tell her about Beth and figured that it might as well come from him. “There's more,” he told Maggie, who pulled away from Glenn, looking over at hi expectantly.

Glenn shook his head, “Daryl, we can tell her tomorrow–”

“She'll find out tomorrow' on her own, Glenn!” Daryl snapped. “It's better she hear it from us.”

“What?” Maggie asked. “What's wrong?”

“Beth doesn't remember anythin' from before she woke up,” Daryl told her. “She don't know anythin' 'bout us. Her friends, her family. She doesn't remember.”

Maggie's eyes glazed over for a moment and she looked deep in thought. Daryl wasn't sure how the woman was going to take it considering the hell she had gone through since Beth's supposed demise. Daryl himself had been on the verge of losing it a few times, so on some level, he knew that Maggie had been going through some hard shit herself.

“Don't matter,” Maggie finally said. “I don't care if she remembers me or not. She's _alive_ , Daryl and I wanna stay here with her. If she ever decides she wants to leave, I'll be going with her. I'm not leaving her again.”

Carol who was standing on the side next to Tyreese and Sasha nodded, “It's settled then.”

“Beth stays, we stay,” Sasha agreed and another affirmative nod came from Tyreese.

“In that case,” Morgan spoke from behind Daryl, “why don't you all get yourself some sleep? The lil' Lady hasn't been planning on leaving this joint behind any time soon, so you might as well get settled.”

“I'll keep first watch,” Daryl said, reaching for his crossbow.

“Daryl, you need sleep,” Rick said, his hand on Daryl's shoulder stopping him from moving any further. “You've been keeping watch almost every night for the past seven months. I think you deserve all the rest you can get.”

“There's a room with a single bed at the end of the hallway,” Michonne told him. “You can get your rest there and all the privacy you want.”

“Eugene said he put up post-its on all the bedrooms with the names of the people sleeping there, so we'll know where to find each other,” Rick informed. “Michonne, you'll be staying with me and the kids in the master bedroom, if that's fine with you.”

“I'll help with Judith if you need it,” was all Michonne said. Rick gave her an appreciative smile and a curt nod before turning to Carol.

“You and Noah will be sharing, if that's okay? Abraham already showed him the room before he and Rosita went to bed, so he should already be settled in,” he said and Carol nodded, reaching for her backpack.

“I'll keep watch tonight,” Morgan told them. “But it's rarely needed here. Not sure why, but the walkers almost never seem to come this way.”

“We're not takin' any chances,” Daryl said. “Since we're all settled then, I'm off.” He grabbed his crossbow and the bag he carried with him, slinging it over his shoulder. “G'night.”

“We'll look around tomorrow,” Rick called after him. “Maybe divide some chores or somethin'.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Daryl muttered dismissively, walking up the stairs. He passed the other rooms with post its on them, their names scribbled on Eugene's messy handwriting along with a note on the door that apparently lead to the bathroom. Daryl walked down the hallway until he reached the door with his name on it and opened it.

The room was small, but not necessarily smaller than the cells they had had in the prison. The bed looked comfortable enough and Daryl snorted when he saw the pink sheets. He didn't really care about the color, but it had been unexpected and he wondered briefly whether Beth had been the one to put them there.

It seemed like something the old her would do, but he wasn't so sure about the new one.

Daryl shrugged off his stuff, putting them on the floor and lit the flashlight he always had with him. He wasn't sure whether there were any lamps around that wouldn't need electricity, but for tonight he would be good. Rick and he would figure out the rest with Morgan tomorrow, probably.

When he walked over to close his door though, he froze for a moment, flashlight in his mouth. On the door across from his, just a meter and a half away actually, there was a bright yellow post-it.

_Beth_ .

Daryl read her name over and over again, wondering momentarily if Michonne had somehow instructed him to get this room on purpose. The woman was infuriating and she, along with everyone else in their group, had come to the conclusion that Beth had meant something to Daryl; that she had been someone  _important_ .

Yet, none of them would ever understand just how important, mostly because Daryl hadn't figured it out himself yet.

And now the girl who meant so much to him was sleeping in the room across from his.

Daryl swallowed, reading her name again, taking the flashlight out of his mouth as he stepped into the hallway again. He moved toward the door, wanting and  _needing_ to see her one last time before he fell asleep, just to make sure that she really, truly was there.

His hand hovered on the door knob and he brushed the gold-painted hold with his fingers once before finally pulling his hand away with another sigh.

If he opened that door, and she wasn't there, he would die all over again inside and there would be no coming back from it ever again.

He had seen her, Michonne had talked to her and her name was on the door. That had to be enough for him right now.

Gently, he put his hand on the white-painted door, closing his eyes as he imagined her sleeping soundly in a soft bed on the other side. Her eyes closed and her lips slightly parted, her cheeks pink, like they had been during those nights he had stayed awake all night, keeping her safe while keeping watch, when they had been alone in the woods after the fall of the prison.

That had been before he had realized how amazing she truly was; before the shack and before the funeral home. Daryl could still remember the way her blush had deepened one morning when she had woken up to find that he had placed his angel-winged vest around her, after she had started shivering, since they couldn't light a fire and risk getting found by walkers.

She had thanked him and he hadn't said anything, only glared at the ground as he began packing their things up again, ready to move to their next location.

Finally, Daryl pulled away from the door and walked back into his room. He shrugged off his vest and hung it on one of the hooks on the wall. He laid down on the bed and tried to get used to the softness now that he had slept on the ground for the better of these last seven months.

T wisting and turning, he finally settled on his back, putting his arm over his eyes to keep out the moonlight that shone in through the window. Before he fell asleep, he wondered whether Beth had the same view from her room as he had from his, and reminded himself to ask Morgan for some damn sheets that didn't make him feel like he was sleeping inside the house of a Barbie doll.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, the chapters from now on will be mixed with Daryl and Beth's point of views. I might even have another character in focus after a while, if you want... Oh an it's kinda difficult to keep track of all the characters in this fic, so as the story processes, I might overlook some of them a little, but remember: they're still there in the background, but not in focus! I'm not ready to start killing them off...yet... ;)  
> Thank you for reading! Don't forget to show your support! :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth's first day with the newcomers who are supposedly her family doesn't go quite as anyone would have hoped. Meanwhile, Daryl goes on a run and Michonne gives some insight on the situation of his feelings...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 9k people! 9k! I can't believe that this chapter is over 9k long!
> 
> Okay, back to business! ;) I promised an update for Christmas Eve, so here ya go! Early Christmas present! ;) Thank you for all the support and love you've given on this story! All the comments/kudos/subscriptions are highly appreciated!
> 
> Now, I hope you enjoy this one! ;)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 4

Beth laid on her back and stared up at the ceiling in her room. It was still early since the sun hadn't even properly gone up yet and she suspected that she and Morgan might be the only people awake in the house.

She didn't know the people who had come into their home last night, which meant that she didn't know their sleeping patterns. They had clearly been on the road for far too long and Beth had to rethink her previous suspicion, since she realized that they were probably less used to sleeping in than she and Morgan were.

Despite the safety they had in the farmhouse, she and Morgan had always made a point of waking up earlier, checking the perimeters together, ensuring that the fences had held during the night. On rare occasions, Beth woke up before Morgan did and checked the barriers herself before returning to heat up some soup for the older man. Now, she didn't know what to expect when she went downstairs.

Would it be her and Morgan alone in the early mornings, or would the newcomers have already invaded their daily routine and added their own to it?

Beth didn't know what to think, so she just laid there, on her bed and stared up at the ceiling.

After about ten minutes of staring, she got inpatient and finally stood up. Quickly, she pulled out her jeans from her drawer, checking the small tear that she had on her right knee. It was fringing, but it wasn't too bad yet. It was warm outside which meant she could still use them and once winter came around, she could sew them up or just use the ones she had used last winter, if they still fit her.

She had been loosing weight over the summer, due to sweating and running around in the woods; exploring and hunting with Morgan. The man wasn't a natural like she apparently was, but he knew enough to survive. At other times, he taught her how to fight properly and how to win and Beth did her best to regain physical wellness and become even stronger than Morgan believed she was.

The scars were still there though; on her face, under her chin, on her wrist. The physical evidence of what she had been through at some point in her life, but that she couldn't remember at all. When she had showed Morgan the cut on her wrist, he had told her about his wife and son; the people he had loved the most and failed to protect. He told her about a man named Rick Grimes, that he had acted like a crazy man toward and the regret he felt about not going with him instantly.

Morgan had told her that they were going to look for Rick and his family and join up with them, wherever they were. He had said that their chance for survival would become much bigger if they found the Grimes family, since Morgan had seen that they were survivors.

When Beth had agreed to accompany Morgan, she never would have believed that she had once belonged to Rick Grimes' group. For Morgan to randomly come across them and convince them to come with him had been such a small probability, and yet, they were now under the same roof as her.

Beth swallowed down the lump in her throat as she finally pulled on her jeans and grabbed her short-sleeved black t-shirt which she put on over the light pink tank top she had worn the night before. Folding her pajamas, she put them underneath her pillow and made her bed before untangling her unruly curls, pulling them up in a high ponytail.

She looked herself in the mirror and nodded lightly, grabbing her toothbrush and the paste that she had insisted Morgan bring back several packs of during one of his latest runs. Hesitating only for a moment, she put her hand on the door handle, thinking about who she might risk running into in the hallway.

It wasn't that she wasn't partially excited to meet the people she had once known, it really wasn't. Her only doubt laid in disappointing them for being different than what they remembered. She knew that she would never be the person she had once been and it horrified her that they- _her family_ , wouldn't accept her.

Gathering the courage she had, she opened the door and stepped into the hallway. The first thing that she noticed, was a post-it on the door opposite hers; the small room that she had shown Carl last night had apparently been claimed by someone named Daryl. She remained there, staring at the scribble before blinking a few times, pursing her lips together. Turning, she looked at her own door and found that that one too had a sticker on it with her name written there.

It would make sense for them all to do something like that, until they all got used to the house and learned which door lead to which room. Shaking her head, Beth walked down the hall toward the bathroom, reading every post-it on every door that she passed. She almost came to a stop again outside of the room that now apparently belonged to Maggie and someone called Glenn. It was probably not a wild guess, but she assumed that Glenn was the Asian, who was also Maggie's husband, and if Maggie really was her sister, then Glenn was also her brother-in-law.

She pushed the door to the bathroom open and quickly stepped inside, happy that she hadn't been forced to talk to anyone this early. Her voice was usually well-rested in the morning and most days, Beth would enjoy being quiet while Morgan did all the talking and she listened. She liked saving her voice for when it was really needed and the mornings were the only times that her throat didn't feel sore.

After she finished in the bathroom, she returned her toothbrush to her room and then headed downstairs, trying to make as little noise as possible. She needed to talk to Morgan and ask him what he had planned for the day and also, she needed to know what they would be doing with all these people that were now with them.

When she arrived in the living room, where Morgan usually slept on the couch, she was surprised to see Rick and Morgan standing by the window, discussing something while Rick held little Judith in his hands, bouncing her every now and then, making the baby laugh.

“I talked to Daryl before he left,” Rick told Morgan. “He'll have no problem huntin' after we start building a stronger fence. We're not lazy, Morgan. We're used to hard work.”

“You're probably the only people I'd ever open this house to, Rick,” Morgan replied. “I don't worry about you not pulling your weight, but I do worry about how this'll effect the lil' Lady upstairs.”

Beth took a few steps up the stairs again and then descended, making sure that her footsteps would be heard as she practically stomped down. Both men looked up at her as she stepped out in front of them, wringing her hands together as she looked from one to the other.

“Good mornin',” she said, nodding curtly at Rick, who looked a little dazed. It was clear that he still hadn't gotten used to seeing her alive, but she couldn't exactly blame him since it had only been one night since he had first seen her.

“Mornin' Beth,” Rick nodded back, shifting Judith in his arms, holding the baby against his shoulder. “How are you?”

“Good,” Beth replied, feeling a little awkward. “Did you guys sleep well?” She might as well be polite since they'd be staying there with her and Morgan from now on.

“Well enough,” Rick said. “Judy here was a little fussy, but we handled it. Thank you for putting that crib up for her.”

“It's nothin',” Beth said quickly. “I'm glad I could help.”

Rick nodded thoughtfully, his eyes looking her over as if to yet again make sure that he wasn't hallucinating.

“Were you guys discussin' somethin' before I got here?” Beth questioned, walking a little closer to them, but toward Morgan, since she actually knew him.

“Rick here was just telling me that he sent some of his people out on a quick run,” Morgan explained. “They want to build a stronger fence against the walkers.”

“We've been here for months and the fences have held,” Beth frowned. “Do you think somethin' will happen?”

Rick watched her again before looking out the window briefly and then back at her, “Can't do us any bad to just make the barriers between us and _them_ a little stronger, can it?”

Beth looked at the baby in the man's hands and thought about the young boy, whose hand she had held onto last night as she had led him upstairs while he had silently cried. Two children that needed protecting and a big group, who had been on the road for too long, watching their back with every step they took.

“I suppose not,” Beth agreed, her eyes not wavering from the little girl who was laughing in her father's arms. She remembered the birthday party she had promised Carl and she silently swore to herself that she would find the things she needed to make it happen, whenever they decided that it was Judith's birthday. “I'll help you if you need it,” she told Rick, still referring to the fences.

“Michonne and Daryl went out with Abraham, Rosita, Sasha and Tyreese to look for any kind of wood that can be used to build the walls,” Rick explained and Beth couldn't help but give him a look. The man seemed to catch his own mistake and Beth watched as the corner of his mouth twitched, almost bitterly. “Right, ya don't know them,” he said, mostly reminding himself.

“I know who Michonne is, at least,” Beth shrugged, trying not to make a big deal out of it even though she felt sick to her stomach knowing that she should recognize the names.

“Don't,” Rick said quickly. For a moment Beth wondered what he was saying, but then he continued, “You have nothin' to feel bad for.”

She took a small breath and stared at the man, who had been able to read her face. It proved to her that he had indeed once known her and if he could still recognize her tells, maybe there was still hope for her being the person she had once been; the Beth they had known and maybe even loved.

“You never officially met Abraham's group,” Rick explained, “so there's nothin' for ya to remember there. Sasha and Tyreese were with us before... They're siblings. You'll get to know them again, when you feel like it.” He gave her a pointed look, “No one here is going to pressure you into anythin', Beth. You take your time and deal with this however you want to, and we'll respect your choices.”

Beth could only nod and smile lightly at the man, who had lifted at least one of the weights that she had had on her shoulders since she had woken up. “Thank you, Rick,” she said, smiling warmly at him before turning to Morgan, raising an eyebrow at him.

He immediately understood her silent question and nodded at the door, “The rest of them are already outside. The only one still asleep is Rick's boy, Carl. The poor kid was exhausted.”

“Not that it would have stopped him,” Rick informed them. “I had to threaten to tie him to the bed so that he wouldn't run out. Told him he needed to rest up and he disagreed, right up until he fell asleep again, which was a second after I pushed him down on the bed again.”

Rick had spoken with such seriousness and the image that he painted in Beth's mind brought out a giggle from her. The man looked down at her and she blushed, but when she saw that Rick too was smiling, it felt a little easier again.

Rick and Michonne were clearly not bad people. Judith was a baby and Carl was just a kid, so she wasn't expecting it to be difficult to get along with them either. Still, the rest of the group remained and Beth wasn't sure how they would act toward her. When she thought about it, she recalled the older woman who had peppered her face with kisses and sobbed against her when she had recognized her but it didn't take long until her mind drifted to the man who had been leaning against the wall, a crossbow near him.

The nagging feeling that she should know him was even more prominent than it was with the other newcomers, and Beth honestly didn't know what to think about that. The rugged man had barely been able to meet her eyes, but when she had passed him on her way to the kitchen, he had looked up at her and his intense blue eyes had bored into hers, almost taking her breath away.

The pain she had seen there had been mixed with confusion and anger. There had been a storm raging inside of his eyes and she had wondered if the man was as explosive as he seemed to be.

But she would not be judging anyone until she personally talked to them. She had originally been a little frightened of Rick and so far, he had proven himself to be harmless to her.

Finally, Beth decided to excuse herself and walk outside, into the sun. She needed the fresh air and she wanted to meet the others so that she could slowly start getting to know them again.

Though, it didn't remove the fear she felt about her being rejected, now that she had changed.

* * *

Daryl pulled the planks into Morgan's pickup that they had borrowed for the run while Michonne put the bags with the tools and the nails in the back seat of Tyreese's jeep.

They had found a hardwood store a couple of miles from the farmhouse, in a small, almost completely abandoned town. There had been a couple of walkers there, but due to the clear lack of food, the other dead ones had most likely wandered off to a new destination.

_Like damn animals,_ Daryl thought bitterly to himself as he pulled out a cigarette and stuck it between his lips, not lighting it just yet. He continued helping Abraham and Tyreese lift the planks onto the pickup and load some of them to the roof of the jeep while Rosita and Sasha kept watch; sniper rifles with silencers in their hands.

“Lookin' good, ladies,” Abraham casually commented, sending a wink Rosita's way as he did. The younger woman flipped him off before turning her back on him, continuing her watch while Sasha snickered next to her.

It was good to see Sasha smile again. Daryl might not have been the closest to her when they had been in the prison, but the woman had been a part of the council and he had high respect for her strength. After Bob's death, quickly followed by Beth's, she had lost her way a bit, not much unlike Daryl. She had begun pulling away from the group until finally a scare with Tyreese had led to her getting her grip together. It was clear that she didn't want to lose her brother at any cost and when that damn walker had been close to biting him because he had been watching her back instead of his own, she had put herself together once again.

“How long do ya think we'll stay at the farmhouse?” Abraham asked, turning to Daryl, who leaned against the pickup as he finally lit his cigarette.

He took a long drag of it before answering, “As long 's Beth stays there.” It was his guess, but also his own decision. There was no way that he would be leaving the girl behind now that they'd gotten her back. Maggie had been right the night before and it seemed like everyone else in their group agreed to it. Yet, Daryl understood Abraham's doubts, but since Washington was a no-go, they might as well stay where they were, since it seemed to be safe enough.

“At least it's safer than travelin' on the roads,” Abraham shrugged. “Ya got one for me?” he wondered, nodding toward Daryl's cigarette.

“No,” Daryl smirked, flicking some ash on the ground.

“Come on ya dirty old redneck,” Abraham chuckled. “Let's celebrate that ya got ya girl back.”

His choice of words made Daryl freeze, the cigarette hanging loosely from his fingertips. He glanced over at Sasha and Rosita, wondering whether they had heard what Abraham had said and then tried to pinpoint where Michonne had gone to. No one other than him seemed to have heard the other man's words and he shot said man a glare before putting the cigarette back in his mouth.

“Beth ain't my girl,” Daryl told him sternly and he was surprised to see Abraham's eyebrow quirk up.

“I didn' say that,” the older man clarified. “I mean that she's ya group's girl.”

Daryl felt his face heat up a little at his own mistake, but Abraham didn't seem to want to say anything about his mishap. Instead of saying anything stupid again, Daryl dug his cigarette pack out of his back pocket and offered one to Abraham, who gratefully took it from him.

They stood there and smoked in silence for a bit before Abraham decided to keep working. He hollered at Rosita to come with him and the girl rolled her eyes before telling him to keep his voice down, just before they entered the store again.

“I'll take a small look around the back,” Sasha told him and he nodded at her. “You coming with me, Ty?” she asked her brother, who instantly dropped the boards he had been securing.

“Don' take too long,” Daryl told them, “We need to be headin' back 'fore nightfall.”

Sasha gave him an affirmative nod and he watched silently as the siblings walked off. Dropping the cigarette to the ground, he stomped it out before walking over to the jeep to finish what Tyreese had started.

“So?” Michonne said, suddenly next to him. He wanted to yell at her for being sneaky again, but this time, he had actually been paying attention to his surroundings, so he had no problem in identifying her footsteps as she had approached him.

“What?” he grunted, lifting the planks onto the jeep, tying them with the rope they had found inside.

“What are we going to do with Beth?” Michonne clarified, standing next to him so that he was forced to look at her.

“There ain't nothin' we can do,” he told her, the bitterness seeping into his tone again.

Michonne narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head, “Do I need to remind you that I was there when you carried Beth out of that hospital?” Daryl only stared at her before reaching into his back pocket again to pull out another cigarette. He needed it to calm his nerves if they were going to have this conversation. “I watched you, Daryl,” Michonne told him. “I saw the way you held her body to your chest, refusing to let her go as we drove to get her body out of that retched city.”

“Well, I clearly didn' hold 'er tight enough, 'cause I sure as hell didn' feel her heartbeat,” Daryl pointed out, dragging the smoke in from the cigarette.

“Don't beat yourself up about it,” Michonne said. “We all thought she was dead.”

“I shoulda know better,” he told the woman. “Beth's a fighter. 'Course she woulda survived a goddamn gunshot wound to the head.”

Michonne only shook her head at him. “My point still stands,” she repeated. “I saw the way you were after her and I'm calling it now, saying that you won't be able to stay away from her.”

Deep down, he knew that Michonne was right, but he would never admit it to her or to anyone else. He had already felt the urge to step inside Beth's room the night before, if only to see her breathing one more time before he went to bed, and this morning, he had found himself sitting on the floor in the hallway, his back against his own door as he read her name over and over again on the post-it that was stuck on the white frame.

“I'm not goin' near her,” Daryl tried again. “The girl's been through enough. I ain't gonna force her to get to know me 'til she's ready to start acceptin' us into her life again.”

“Doubt it,” Michonne said, a teasing tone in her voice. “After all, she already has you marked,” she added, giving him a pointed look.

“What're ya goin' on about now?” he asked, looking at her questioningly. His heart beat wildly in his chest as he watched Michonne's eyes travel to _that place_ , right beneath his collarbone, a little over his heart.

“I haven't told anyone about it, if that's what you're really asking,” Michonne said. “The two of us are the only that know your little secret Dixon and it should probably stay that way. For now at least.”

Daryl's hand moved off its own accord, touching the place that Michonne's eyes had been trained at earlier. “You don' know what you're talkin' 'bout,” he mumbled, narrowing his eyes at her.

“I'm not judging you,” Michonne told him sternly. “I'm just sayin' that I'd understand if you wouldn't be able to keep yourself from wanting to check on her. That doesn't mean that you won't respect her wishes, just that it'll eat you up from the inside to keep her out of arms reach.”

Daryl eyed her before shooting her a glare, knowing that there was no way of convincing the woman that her suspicions about him weren't true. “You're too damn observant for your own good,” he muttered before throwing his cigarette on the ground, covering it with his boot.

* * *

Usually when Beth walked outside in the morning, she would enjoy herself by breathing in the quiet morning air as she walked around the a couple of times, making sure that the barbed wire was intact and the make-shift fence Morgan had built hadn't crumbled. She'd enjoy the silence and allow herself to think back, try to clear her head and maybe remember something from her past, even though it normally didn't do her any good, since it all seemed to have been erased.

Sometimes though, she got the strangest flash of something; usually a shadow that she could never see the face of, who spoke to her, voice disoriented, no matter how hard she tried to focus on hearing it clearer. After that a deep frustration usually set in and Morgan always noticed the change in her, so he kept quiet and let her get herself together for a few hours until she was ready to speak with him. She never told him much about what she saw in the small flashes that returned to her because she could never really be too sure that they had actually occurred. Her memories, no matter how brief, were her own and Morgan respected that enough not to ask her about it. He knew that she was hurting over not remembering her old life; that she was mourning the loss of the people she would never remember knowing or caring about, and that was enough for him to give her space whenever he saw that she was deep in thoughts.

This morning though, was _very_ different.

Beth stepped outside of the house, only to be greeted by the sight of the newcomers checking the barriers that she had been about to check. They were talking about improvements; a man with a mullet telling a girl about how they could build walls more effectively and organize their runs more properly. They didn't seem to see her for a moment, but finally, the Asian man, Glenn, looked up from where he was standing next to his wife and stared at her.

The others seemed to notice that his attention had drifted elsewhere and they also turned around to look at her. Beth swallowed thickly when she met her sister's eyes and she didn't know what she was supposed to do.

Maggie began walking toward her, Glenn instantly falling into step behind her while the others stayed back, probably deciding that it was better to give them some privacy. Beth felt as if the walls were closing in on her as Maggie came closer and closer and panic instantly began bubbling inside of her.

What was she going to say?

What was she going to do?

She could only stare at the woman who was apparently her sister as the brunette came to a halt just a couple of feet away from her. Beth stared at her, blinking a few times before glancing at Glenn, who seemed equally confused as to what they should do.

“Maggie,” Beth finally said, clearing her throat. It was when Maggie's eyes lit up with hope that Beth realized her mistake of addressing the woman with her first name. Maggie had no idea that Michonne had told her her name and she had probably misunderstood Beth's knowledge of her name as Beth remembering her. “Michonne told me your name last night,” Beth clarified, feeling horrible when she saw the flicker of hope diminish. “You must be Glenn,” Beth continued, holding her hand out to the man, who glanced at Maggie before taking it and shaking it lightly.

“Did you sleep well?” Beth wondered, sensing that neither her sister nor her brother-in-law were going to say anything.

“Yeah,” Maggie finally drawled, still looking at her with something that looked like a mix of both hurt and awe. “You?”

“Yeah,” Beth echoed, not being able to look away from her sister. She tried to see anything that resembled her in her sister's face, but there weren't many similarities there.

“What else did Michonne tell you?” Maggie finally asked, after a long moment of silence.

“Not much,” Beth admitted. “She thought it would be better if I tried remembering you all by myself. I asked her about you though and she told me you're my sister.”

Maggie's eyes seemed to water and the woman clenched her jaw, nodding a little. Beth watched her silently, wondering what else she could say. If Michonne had mentioned Maggie being her sister, she most likely would have told her if she had had other relatives. Since she didn't, Beth assumed that Maggie was the only one that was alive and deep down, Beth wanted to know what had happened to the others.

But perhaps another time.

“Well,” Beth finally said, looking down at the ground, “I need to go look for some clothes that Morgan and I put away in the closet.”

Maggie only nodded and Beth could literally feel how the awkwardness and the tension of the situation only rose. She felt suffocated again and she needed to get out of there.

“I'll see you later then,” Beth mumbled, turning her back to her sister and walked straight into the house again, closing the door firmly. She looked out through the small window and saw how Maggie had slung her arms around Glenn and how the man was trying to comfort his wife the best he could, but it was clear that nothing would ease Maggie's heartache.

It made Beth wonder if she herself had ever had anyone who had looked after her the way that Glenn was looking after Maggie and once again, it cut her deep knowing that she would probably never remember.

* * *

Beth was going through the clothes in the bags when she heard someone approach her from behind. She turned around and saw the woman who had been talking to the man with the mullet peering down at her curiously, “What are you doing?”

The woman was around Maggie's age, probably, and Beth shrugged, continuing to fold the sweaters that had been too big for her, but would probably fit the other woman who had joined the household. “I'm takin' out the clothes we put away when we cleaned this place up,” Beth explained. “Winter will be comin' 'round soon enough and you lot might need the extra layers.”

“That's kind of you,” the woman said. “Would you like some help folding?”

Beth hesitated before she finally nodded and scooted over a bit as the woman sat down on the floor next to her.

“I'm sorry I don't know your name,” Beth said after a minute of silence.

“Tara,” the woman introduced herself. “Don't worry about it though. The two of us never officially met. I was new to the group and when I finally got the chance to meet you, you were already...”

“Dead?” Beth suggested, looking up at Tara with a quirked eyebrow.

“Yeah,” Tara drawled, but continued folding the long sleeved shirts without looking at Beth. “For what it's worth, it was pretty obvious that your family cared a great deal about you. They still do.”

“I guess,” Beth shrugged, “but that doesn't mean that I haven't spent the last seven months wondering how much they cared if they didn't even notice I was alive before they buried me.”

Her bluntness seemed to take Tara aback, but she didn't stay anything on the matter. Beth decided that so far, she actually liked this woman. She was kind enough to try to talk to her, despite not knowing her, and had even tried to reassure Beth of her family's love for her. Even when Beth had turned the conversation around and made it sour, the woman had had the decency not to say anything else on the matter.

By saying those words to Tara, Beth had made it clear that she would need time to work things out and she was glad that Tara understood enough to give her space.

A couple of hours later, Beth was still folding clothes with Tara and the two of them had fallen into an easy conversation about everything and anything that wasn't related in any way to Beth's past that she had no memories of.

“I swear, my dad was more nervous about meeting my first real girlfriend than she was about meeting him,” Tara grinned, putting a pair of jeans aside for herself. She had joked with Beth about having first pick since she was helping her clean out the closet and Beth had agreed to let her choose whatever she wanted. Tara had then started telling her stories from her own past, from before the turn, and Beth had found herself laughing and giggling over the silliest things.

It felt nice to have someone new to talk to; it was refreshing.

And it all seemed to be going well until the door opened and the people who had been on the run returned home.

Beth had been mid-laugh when the door had opened, and she had turned around, smile still on her face as her eyes had met with the man who had frozen in the doorway. Her breath hitched and her smile fell as his blue eyes flashed with something she couldn't remember ever seeing in anyone's eyes before she had met him and for a mere second, she wanted to reach out for him with her hand.

However, the man seemed to be shaken out of his daze when a much taller and much louder man told him to get out of the way. Beth couldn't help but notice the slightly red tint that covered the man's cheeks when he finally moved away and she felt her own face heat up when he walked right past her and Tara, without saying another word.

“Don't worry about him,” Tara spoke, shaking Beth out of her thoughts and back to reality. “Daryl is just gonna need some time to adjust to having you alive again.”

“ _Daryl_ ,” Beth repeated his name, trying it out as she willed her brain to try and remember him. It wasn't a surprise when she didn't find any memory whatsoever of him and she turned to look at Tara again. “I think everyone is gonna need some time,” she told the other woman, who could only nod her head in agreement.

* * *

Daryl had never felt more awkward in his entire life than he had felt when Carol had announced that they would all be eating together that evening.

She and Maggie had apparently worked together with Glenn to find a table that would be big enough to set in the living room and they had all worked together to make some homemade meals for them all to share when dinner came around. They had set the plates and everything, but all Daryl wanted was to get the hell out of the room, because he felt as if her couldn't breathe.

When the announcement had been made about dinner, Daryl had been outside, working on unloading the wooden boards that they had acquired on their run and if that hadn't been awkward enough, Beth had just walked out on the porch together with Morgan and her eyes had been set on him the instant Carol had spoken.

Since he had walked into the farmhouse when he had gotten back, he had tried his best to avoid Beth. The brief encounter when he had entered the house after getting back had clearly made her uncomfortable and that was the least of what he wanted to make her feel. It was just that when he had walked in, and seen the bright smile on her face and heard the giggles escaping her, his mind had gone back to their time in the funeral home, where he had been the one to make her laugh.

The memories had flooded him so suddenly, because since her death he had tried his best not to think of them, and he had frozen in the doorway, blocking the way of Abraham and everyone else. When Abraham had finally lost his temper and pushed him forward, Daryl had snapped out of the daze and embarrassment had flooded through him.

From that moment, he had made sure to not step into the same room as Beth, avoiding her as if she was some disease that he didn't want to catch.

And now, he was sitting at the same table as her, eating dinner; as if it was the most normal of occurrences in the world.

She was sitting with Morgan on one side of her and Carl on the other, but she wasn't looking at any of them as she picked at her food with her fork. Daryl himself was sitting securely on the other end of the table, as far away from her as possible. If he had been allowed a choice (which accordingly to Carol he didn't) he wouldn't be sitting there at all. Instead, he would probably be laying in his room, or sleeping in a tent outside, just so that he wouldn't be near the blonde that had consumed his entire mind since she had turned out to be alive.

He understood that Beth was uncomfortable. Especially considering that Maggie was sitting down in front of her, staring at her all the time, while no one spoke a single word as they ate.

After a couple of minutes of silence, apart from Judith's gurgling as Rick fed her, Carol finally broke it, “Have you made up a plan on the fence building?”

“Yeah,” Abraham said, glancing around the table, “we'll start buildin' it tomorrow.”

“Maybe we can dig some pits by the forest?” Tyreese suggested. “If any stray walkers pass, they'll fall in before they even start making their way to the fence.”

“Makes sense,” Sasha immediately agreed. “It'll work as a first defense.”

“Mhm...” Rick agreed, not looking up from where he was feeding Judith with a spoon of mashed potatoes that they had made from the potato powder Beth had shown Carl when the boy had told her that he wasn't sure Judith would like rabbit stew.

“I can draw some blueprints for the fence,” Eugene said. Daryl rolled his eyes and Michonne must have noticed, because she elbowed him in his side, covering a snicker with a cough.

Ever since Eugene had turned out to be a liar and Abraham had beat him half to death, the fake scientist had tried to help out as much as he could by being the one to organize their works and runs. He never went on them himself, but neither of them could deny that the man was smart, whether he was a scientist or not. He had a knack for drawing blueprints and making suggestions on how to do some vital things, like filter water and such, so in the end, he actually proved to be useful, even if they had forced him to pull his weight by rationing their food and keeping his eyes on the map that they used to pinpoint where they were.

Still, once a liar, forever a liar, so Daryl had tasked Noah with keeping an eye on him and to report back to him if he ever did anything suspicious. So far, Noah hadn't noticed Eugene doing anything strange, and since seven months had passed since he had given the task, Daryl had accepted that maybe the man really was being honest. It didn't hurt to keep him under watch though.

When Daryl focused in on the conversation again, it had apparently already ended and silence had filled the room again.

“What were you up to these seven months, Beth?”

Maggie's question hung in the air and Daryl snapped his eyes toward the brunette. She was watching her younger sister expectantly and when Daryl turned his attention to the younger Greene sister, he noticed that the girl had frozen in her seat, not looking up at Maggie or anyone else in the room.

She was breathing through her nose, taking deep breaths as if she was trying to calm herself, and Daryl noticed how Morgan put his fork on the table before his hand disappeared under it, clearly taking the hand Beth was resting on her lap in his. The older man was looking at the girl with something that Daryl had only seen in Hershel's eyes: fatherly concern.

Daryl remembered what Morgan had told him and Rick about Beth having memory flashes and not talking about them. How she would sometimes daze off and then come back as if nothing was wrong, but still talk as if something inside of her had changed.

When Beth finally looked up at Maggie, it was the first time that night that Daryl had really taken time to look at the young girl. There was a frown etched on her face as she stared her older sister down and evident anger and confusion in her eyes.

“I was recovering from a gunshot, where the bullet passed through my head from under my chin,” Beth bluntly replied. Daryl watched as Maggie leaned back a little in her chair, obviously not expecting that kind of answer. “I was trying to remember my own name for over three months and tried to remember the people I might have known before I was presumed dead and _buried_ _alive_.”

“Lady,” Morgan said, in an almost warning tone next to her, and Beth snapped her head in his direction, standing up from her seat. There was a mix of emotions playing on her face, only some of which that Daryl recognized. He had seen that broken look when they had been at the country club where she had finally gotten her hands on a bottle of Peach Schnapps; when she had fulfilled one mission only to see that it had been for nothing, because her father was still dead and her sister and the rest of their family was missing too.

“Excuse me,” Beth bit out as she walked off and hurried to the stairs, practically running up the stairs and away from them all. They heard a door slam shut loudly and then, absolute silence.

Maggie covered her face with her hands and put her elbows on the table, clearly upset by what had just transpired between her and her sister. “I should have just kept my mouth shut,” she cried into her hands.

“It's alright,” Morgan tried to assure her. “The lil' Lady is just used to it just being the two of us. She's just gonna need some time before she starts opening up about what she's been through since she woke up.”

“We buried her alive,” Maggie said, looking up at the man. Glenn rubbed his hand on Maggie's back and looked around the table helplessly. “We _buried_ her, Morgan. How is she ever gonna forgive us for that? I can't imagine what she must've felt like when she woke up.”

“She just needs _time_ ,” Morgan insisted again. “She might be different from what you remember, I can't say since I didn't know her back then, but remember that she's still Beth. Deep inside, she's still your sister, but you gotta see that this is just as difficult for her as it is for you.”

“Morgan is right,” Carol said. “I watched her today. She was uncomfortable with us, but I think it's mostly because she doesn't know how to act around us.”

“I spent hours folding clothes with her,” Tara piped up, raising her hand to get their attention. “She was perfectly fine then, but it probably has to do with her knowing that she didn't know me before. It was like she was trying to get to know me for the first time, and she was very nice.”

“Beth is nice,” Carl pointed out. “I don't think she's that much different. I mean, sure, she doesn't remember us, but she was nice to me and Michonne last night, right Mich?”

The woman nodded, “I told you yesterday what I thought.” She gave Rick and Daryl a pointed look and Rick shifted Judith in his lap before he looked over at Maggie.

“We need to stop pressuring her,” he told her. “She'll come to us when she's ready and 'til then, I suggest none of us bring up what she's been up to these past seven months.”

Everyone around the table nodded their agreement, Daryl included, but he couldn't shake the feeling that someone needed to go and check on the blonde upstairs.

As if he had read his mind, Morgan stood up from his seat, wiping his mouth with a napkin, “I'll check on the lil' Lady and talk to her. I'll try to convince her to be a little more open to you guys, since I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt her on purpose.”

Next to Daryl, Rick gave the a curt nod and they watched as Morgan walked off, up the stairs where Beth had gone.

“Well,” Carol said after a while, standing up with her plate in her hands, “I think we're all just about done eating.”

Daryl couldn't agree more.

* * *

Beth didn't know what had come over her during dinner; all she had known was that she needed to get away from them all.

The entire day she had been able to feel her sister's eyes on her. Maggie seemed to always be watching her from a distance along with the woman who had embraced her the previous night when they had been reunited. Nevertheless, Beth had tried her best to ignore them and keep doing what she had to do.

Tara had tried to teach her the names of everyone while they had folded the clothes they had found in the closet, but to be honest, none of the names rang a bell for Beth. Still, she figured that she needed to keep giving herself time, but that wouldn't exactly be happening if Maggie and everyone else continued to ask questions that only brought back painful memories.

“Lil' Lady?” Morgan called out from the other side of her door, knocking softly. “Can we talk?”

“I'm done talkin' for tonight, Morgan,” Beth told him, but the man opened the door anyway. She rolled her eyes and pushed herself back a little on her bed; her legs up close to her body as she hugged them and rested her chin on her knees.

What she had said was true. She didn't want to talk about anything, especially not the newcomers, but deep down, she knew that her internal issues with having them around needed to be dealt with. They had only been there for a day, and she hadn't exactly given herself any time to actually get to know them all. So far she had only had a normal conversation with Tara, Michonne and Carl, but those encounters had all been brief. She didn't know the others and even though they were supposed to be family, Beth couldn't help the small drop of bitterness that had weaved its way into her heart when Maggie had asked her what she had been up to these seven months that she had been awake.

“Beth,” Morgan began softly, sitting down on the bed where she had made room for him. “You can't be like that toward them. I understand that it must be difficult for you, but you gotta see that Rick's gang are good people and it would be better for us to have them here.”

“There aren't any good people left in the world,” Beth argued, narrowing her eyes at him. She didn't want to believe what she was saying, but her hatred for the situation made her speak like that. “The good people are all gone, Morgan.”

“You don't believe that,” he told her sternly, putting his hand on her arm. “I know you, lil' Lady, and you haven't for one second thought such a silly thing.”

Beth desperately wanted to yell at him; to throw a fit in rage and confusion, but she knew that Morgan knew her better than anyone else. The newcomers didn't know the person she was now; they only knew the memory of the old girl they had once known. Beth didn't know if there was still a part of her that resembled that one, which only made it more difficult for her to accept the way things around the farm would change now.

“I was outta line talkin' to my sister like that, wasn't I?” Beth whispered. She didn't look at Morgan when she felt tears stinging in her eyes.

If there was one thing Beth was certain of, it was the fact that she absolutely _detested_ crying.

It had happened a few times since she had woken up, and the first time, it had been when Morgan had been there. He had been a bit awkward about it because they had only been with each other for a month and Beth's cries had sounded more like choked gasps, but there had been no mistaking the tears streaming down her face.

Since that time, she only cried when she was alone and Morgan was on a run, although it made her feel weak, which was why she hated it so much. If Morgan ever heard her crying out in the garden, he certainly never spoke about it, mostly because he seemed to understand enough to know that she didn't want him to say anything, or give her comfort.

“A little,” Morgan agreed, “but I know it's not easy for you.”

Beth shook her head and brushed her cheeks, “It's just so _frustrating,_ Morgan. I'm supposed to know these people and yet I don't remember a single thing about them!”

“I know, I know,” Morgan said, lightly brushing her arm. “I know you want to remember, but you just gotta have a little faith and it'll all work out in the end.”

“Have a little faith?” Beth scoffed. “It hasn't done me any good so far if my family thought I was dead and buried me alive.” Somewhere in the back of her head another conversation started playing, but the voices were yet again muffled. She closed her eyes, trying to clear her mind, but finally ended up just shaking her head, knowing that it was of no use.

“How could they not know that I was still alive?” she asked. “How is it possible to have mistaken me for being dead? They _buried_ me, Morgan! What does _that_ say about my strength?”

“Don't talk like that, Beth,” Morgan berated her. “If there's one thing I know for sure in this world, that's that you're one hell of a survivor.”

“That doesn't change what happened,” Beth insisted quietly, feeling her chest tighten.

It pained her to know that the people she had once loved had buried her alive, thinking that she was dead. Sure, from what Morgan could tell, she had been shot through the head, and the survival rate for that probably wasn't very high even under normal circumstances.

It didn't change the fact that she _had_ survived though. She was still alive and fighting every day to stay alive. Those months that Maggie had asked about had been painful in every way, except for a moment or two of happiness along the road of recovery. The farmhouse they were staying in now was the first place that Beth had finally felt at peace in, which had been one of the reasons that she wanted to stick around.

“I know you're still struggling,” Morgan sighed, “and it'll take some time until you recover fully. You went through some traumatic stuff and I know it sounds like I'm repeating myself all the time, but you gotta give yourself time to heal.” He brushed a stray lock of blonde hair from her face and smiled softly at her. “You need to keep an open mind when it comes to your family. I know they seem scary, but you've only just met them. Being a part of a larger group increases our chances of survival,” he tried to explain.

“It also increases the risk of losing people,” Beth retorted. “Every single time they'll go on a run, they're gonna risk the farm if walkers follow them. Even if I don't remember them, I don't think I could handle losing them.”

Her admission made Morgan's eyes soften and she turned to face the window, looking out at the night sky.

“That only proves that you care, Beth,” Morgan said. “You care about them.”

Beth continued to look out the window, her gaze moving to the ground below. She saw the way the light from the candles in the hallway lit up the outside just a little as the door opened. Next, she watched curiously as someone walked outside and stood on the grass, lighting a cigarette in the dark.

The small glow from the lighter illuminated the man's face just long enough for Beth to see his face and recognize it. She watched the man who Tara had told her was called Daryl as he smoked his cigarette in the dark and she couldn't help but wonder.

Not necessarily and specifically about _him_ but rather about all the newcomers. It just suddenly hit her that Daryl was so far the only one who she had had eye-contact with that hadn't tried to approach her. The small moment downstairs in the hallway where he had just frozen on spot when seeing her and the way her eyes had drifted to connect with his when she had passed him the night before on the way to the kitchen, made her stomach turn in a funny way that she hadn't felt since she had woken up.

She just couldn't shake the feeling she had about him and to be honest, it was a little embarrassing. It also made her curious to know if the two of them had been friends before everything had happened but Daryl seemed to be more withdrawn than the rest of the group, so she couldn't just walk up to him and ask, could she?

Maybe she could?

Beth watched as Daryl threw the cigarette on the ground, lighting another one immediately. He seemed to be agitated and maybe even a little nervous, considering how he kept taking a step back and forth from the house. It almost looked like he wanted to run away from there.

She watched him as he finally stopped moving, flicking the ash off of his cigarette, taking another deep drag and blowing the smoke out. There was something about him that was...almost mesmerizing.

Beth turned around to look at Morgan who hadn't said a word. Maybe he was right? Maybe she did care about them deep down, which was the reason that she wanted to push them away? What if her subconscious was telling her that it would just end badly for them and that it was better to not get attached?

Morgan met her gaze and waited for her to say something. She could tell that his eyes were searching hers for confirmation that she wouldn't just give up on everything now; not when she had fought so hard for seven months to regain her memories.

Not when she finally might have a chance to get them back.

“Okay.”

Her voice had been so low when she had finally spoken, but it seemed to startle Morgan just the same.

“Okay?” he inquired, raising his eyebrow at her.

“I'll keep an open mind,” she told him. “I'll try to get to know them, but I'm not ready to tell them about... _everything_.” She swallowed thickly and Morgan nodded, understanding perfectly well what it was that she meant.

“It's gonna be alright, lil' Lady,” Morgan said, moving closer so that he could embrace her. She held him back just as tightly, her eyes traveling to the window again. Over Morgan's shoulder, she looked down at the front lawn, but Daryl was nowhere to be seen.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

She would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I just want to mention that as you all know, this is mainly a Bethyl story, but I'm a sucker for slow burn so the two of them won't actually interact one-on-one until chapter 7! I hope that's okay with you, but until then, there will be more awkward "half meetings" as I like to call them and the two of them will be watching each other from afar! ;)
> 
> Also, this story's plot is based on Beth's recovery and how she'll slowly remember things. I'm not entirely sure that she'll remember everything in the end of it, but there will be some memories coming back. I will be having small "confrontations" in the future with other characters and probably a walker attack of two, but they WILL be staying on this farm in this story, as far as I can tell now. There are a few chapters planned in another location, but it's all in that area, so I hope you guys are okay with that! :)
> 
> Once again, thank you for all the support and I'll try my best to write and update again before New Years, but I can't make any promises! I am continuing this story and right now, I have like 19 chapters planned, but more in my mind... This will be a long one, I think... Oh, and do tell me if you'd like me to kick the rating up a notch because there will be some swearing in here and maybe, just maybe, *clears throat* other situations... *wink wink*
> 
> Thank you for reading and don't forget to comment! :) Happy Holidays to ya'll!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A week has passed and Daryl is working alongside the others to build a better wall around the farm. Noah and Carol both have a word with him, while Beth finally decides to take a step to get to know the newcomers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the wonderful response on this fic! :)
> 
> A guest who reviewed on fanfiction mentioned that I don't update very fast, I'm sorry about that, but writing takes time and I don't want it to seem very forced, but I'm doing my best! I sincerely hope you understand. :)
> 
> Now, please enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 5

“Pass me the hammer, will ya?” Abraham's voice rang out in the garden. Daryl rolled his eyes but lifted the second hammer out of the toolbox that Morgan had brought with him when he had joined them in the garden earlier that morning.

“Don't see why ya can't just get it ya'self,” Daryl called out as he threw the hammer toward Abraham, low enough so that it wouldn't hit the man, who was prepared enough to catch it. “Ya lazy ass,” he added under his breath.

“What did ya just call me?” Abraham laughed, but Daryl just shook his head as he continued to nail the new boards to the fence.

They had been working on making the fence around the farm land stronger for almost an entire week now. It was taking time since they needed to go on runs every other day to get more wooden boards and nails in order to cover all parts of the old fence, since they were trying to build something more similar to a wall to keep the walkers out.

Daryl had busied himself with working on the fence instead of actually going on the runs, since they knew that the small towns that were relatively close to the farmhouse were pretty much emptied of walkers who had moved on to other places.

It helped Daryl to work all day to the point of almost exhausting himself, since sleep came easier that way. Rick had set up a watch schedule for them and Daryl had so far only needed to keep watch a couple of hours around midnight, which meant that he had time to sleep a little beforehand.

From what he could tell, Morgan had been right about the farm. There hadn't been many walkers passing through during the week that had passed since they got there and it seemed like the amount of walkers in the area had decreased for some reason. Daryl still wasn't ready to let his guard down around the farm, so he always kept his crossbow close. He knew he wasn't the only one since everyone else also seemed to carry at least one weapon on their body, even when they were inside the fences. If they were going to stay on the farm, they might as well be ready at all times. They had learned from their mistake on the Greene Farm and no one wanted a repeat of that.

Daryl put two nails between his lips as he brought the hammer down on the one he was holding between his fingers. He pushed at the board to make sure that it was secured safely before waving at Noah to bring him another one.

The kid and Glenn were working hard on sawing through the larger boards in order to make them all the same size to build the wall properly and as soon as Daryl had given him his signal, the boy hurried over with one of them under his arm. Noah held it against the old fence as Daryl hammered in the first couple of nails that would keep the board in place.

“Thanks, kid,” Daryl muttered. “Hand me some of those nails.” He pointed at the box that was laying a couple of feet away from him and Noah quickly fetched them for him. For a moment, Daryl was so in sync with working on the fence that he completely forgot about everyone else that was outside.

Until, of course, he heard someone laugh, in a tone so light and genuine that it made him warm on the inside. Lifting his gaze from the wood in front of him, he spotted Beth talking to Tara about something with a huge smile on her face. Tara's hands were moving around animatedly and Beth continued to giggle at whatever it was that the other woman was saying. Finally, Beth said something to Tara, who nodded and squeezed Beth's shoulder, as the blonde retreated inside the farm house again.

Daryl watched intently as the door to the house closed and finally he released a low sigh, turning back to work on the fence.

A week had passed since they had been reunited with Beth and he had still not completely comprehended the fact that she was alive and with them again. He had gone out of his way to avoid her, all just so that he would keep her safe from himself. It wasn't that he would ever intentionally hurt Beth, but it still plagued him to know that he had been the reason that she had been lost in the first place. Over the seven months that he had been alone with his group, when they had thought that Beth was dead, he had done nothing but blame himself for the blonde's demise.

Every single time that he had thought about her, he had wondered what he could have done differently, so that they wouldn't have been separated. His memories of the funeral home had come to him when they had silently walked along the highway toward unknown destinations. He had wondered if there had been something he could have done differently. When those walkers had pushed their way through the door, all he had been able to think about was getting Beth out of there and he had told her to run and wait for him by the road. If she had stayed behind, she wouldn't have been able to fight because of her hurt ankle, but maybe he would have been able to keep her safe with him?

No, he had been outnumbered himself and it had been pure luck and a hell of a lot of adrenaline that had made him survive that night. If Beth had been there, they would surely both have ended up dead.

He thought about the last meal they had eaten together before she had been taken from him. The things he had been feeling that night; had he been imagining it all? Maybe it was wrong for him to think about such a young girl like that, but then again, he couldn't ignore the way that panic had crept up inside of him when she had asked him what had changed his mind about people.

His palms had gotten sweaty and his heart had beat a thousand times faster than it normally would. He had looked over at her and it had all made so much sense at the time, as he watched the smile on her lips be illuminated by the candle lights. She had been so bright and so young and so _innocent_. He was a ragged old, white trash, redneck that would be absolutely no good for her in any other way than as a protector of sorts. Hell, he knew that if she had the choice, she would probably have picked anyone else from the prison to be there with her instead.

But then he remembered the way that she had looked when she realized what he wasn't saying. There hadn't been any disgust on her face when he had silently watched her, trying to tell her everything he couldn't put into words in one single look. The only thing he had seen was realization and then something akin to surprise, confusion and awe all mixed together.

_Oh._

He didn't want to think about what might have happened if he hadn't gotten up to get the door. If he had stayed, he knew that he would have done something incredibly stupid that would have ruined whatever it was that they had built over the few weeks they had been together after the prison had fallen. He knew that she would have wanted to talk about it; whatever  _it_ was, and he wouldn't have been able to do so without making a complete fool out of himself.

If he had told her that he cared about her that night, things might have been different. Deep inside Daryl knew that it would have been an understatement to say that though, because the pain he had felt after she had died in front of him had been much worse than the pain he had felt for anyone he had cared about before.

He hadn't understood the extent of how much his feelings for the girl had grown until she had been laying dead by his feet and he had lost her forever. The  excruciating pain  in his chest that made it feel like his heart had exploded had crumbled him and he had knelt down and cradled Beth's body without even thinking about the people who were watching him.

He hadn't just cared about her.

But now that she was back, he couldn't help but think that maybe it was better that he had never gotten to tell her anything about how he had really grown to feel about her. Perhaps things would have been different, or maybe they wouldn't have changed anything at all? Beth might still have ended up dead, or presumed to be dead, or he might have lost her for real.

It might be better that she didn't remember him or anything that they had gone through together. If she remembered, she would surely have confronted him about his feelings and what would he say then? He was barely comfortable talking about anything relating to himself as it was, and he knew that if Beth ever asked him about what he felt for her, he would try to push her away even more than he already was doing now.

She deserved better and if he ever told her how he felt, she would most likely end up dead for real; just like all the other people he had ever cared about.

“I wish she would remember us,” Noah said as he sat down on the grass next to Daryl, who had been so deep in thought that he hadn't even noticed that the kid had stayed there next to him.

“I ain't getting' my hopes up,” Daryl muttered, going back to hammering.

“Why do you think like that? Because she was shot through the head?” Noah wondered. “Morgan told us that she sometimes remembers small things and that her muscle memory seems to work well. Why wouldn't she remember more?”

Daryl didn't reply. Instead, he continued to work on the fence, deciding to ignore the kid again. Noah had gotten used to Daryl keeping quiet as soon as Beth was mentioned, so he didn't pull back. There had been several times along these last seven months that Noah had talked about the blonde they had thought they had lost with Daryl and Daryl had always proceeded to give him the silent treatment. The only times Daryl had spoken had been rare, and mostly they had been words of comfort when Noah had broken down.

“I miss talking to her,” Noah admitted. “I miss my friend.”

Daryl grunted, lowering his hammer as he turned toward the kid, “Ain't nothin' stoppin' you from talkin' to her.” Noah looked down and started pulling on the grass nervously. Daryl put the hammer on the ground and reached over to put his hand on Noah's shoulder. “Hey,” he said, earning the attention of the kid once more. “Ya can have a conversation with her,” he told him, squeezing his shoulder lightly. “Nobody's gonna stop ya from talkin' to her.”

Noah watched him for a moment before his lips quirked up a little. The kid turned away from him and stared at the wall they were building. “You know, the same thing applies to you,” he told him.

Daryl's hand fell from Noah's shoulder and he stared the kid down, but the younger man couldn't be bothered because he wasn't even looking at Daryl as he spoke.

“You've been avoiding her like she has the plague or something,” Noah continued. “If I talk to her, I think you should too. I know you were close before...”

“If I ever decide to talk to Beth, that's my business,” Daryl snapped, turning back to working on the wall again.

“I didn't want to upset you,” Noah said. “I'm just saying that no one would be blaming you if you wanted to talk to her. Everyone else is trying to get a moment in, so why shouldn't you?”

Noah stood up from the place he had been sitting and walked away. Daryl knew that the kid had a point, but he just couldn't bring himself to talk to Beth. He wasn't sure that he would be able to handle it.

He wouldn't be able to handle her talking to him as if he was a stranger, because he knew that that would be what finally broke him.

* * *

“How are you doing with everything?” Tyreese asked Carol as they worked together behind the house. Tyreese had helped Carol put up a clothing line for their newly washed clothes that Beth had gotten them to dry. Carol had been washing sheets and clothes all day long together with Father Gabriel and now she was doing the hanging together with Tyreese.

“I know you took it hard when Beth...” Tyreese trailed off, clearing his throat. “I mean, I know it wasn't easy for you. What happened all those months ago.”

Carol picked up one of the larger sheets, folding it over the middle before hanging it up. “It was hard for all of us,” she pointed out. “But I guess I felt guilty, in a way.”

“Guilty?” Tyreese questioned. “Why would you feel guilty? What happened wasn't your fault.”

“I felt guilty because both she and I were in that hospital and I was the only one who made it out alive,” Carol explained. “Beth was always like...a daughter to me, I guess. In some weird dysfunctional family kind of way.” Tyreese chuckled at that, but didn't oppose. “When she died, I couldn't believe it. I'm much older than her and I was sick at the time, still recovering from my injuries. She was young and healthy and if someone had told me that only one of us would be getting out of that hospital, I would have bet my money on it being her.”

“You would have collected your winnings then,” Tyreese pointed out.

“Seven, almost eight months later,” Carol bitterly agreed. “When I saw her fall and then Daryl just... _break down_ like that. I knew I couldn't fall apart too. If anything, I needed to be stronger and survive because I knew that he wouldn't be able to lose someone else. Then he retreated into his old silent self and I knew I needed to keep my eye on him.”

“You felt responsible,” Tyreese acknowledged with a curt nod.

“I felt like somehow Beth had died so that I could live,” Carol blinked a few times. “Noah talked to me one night and I realized that he felt the same way, but about himself. He thought that Beth might have gone after Dawn on purpose, knowing that there was a risk she might not make it, only so that Noah would get to leave with us.”

“That's why you took him under your wing?”

“Mhm...” Carol hummed. “I asked him to help me keep an eye on Daryl too, when I wasn't around. It was good for him to have something to do.”

“Can't argue with that,” Tyreese said. “But Carol, you do know that no one actually blames you for what happened, right?”

Carol held the sweatshirt she had been about to hang up in her hands, wringing the material out a little. She looked up at Tyreese wordlessly, the silence speaking what she really thought.

He sighed deeply, “Stop blaming yourself. What happened to Beth was a tragedy but the nightmare is over now. I talked to Sasha yesterday while we were on the run and even she thinks that Daryl is opening up more again, so you don't have to worry about him. Things will be good, eventually.”

Once again, Carol didn't speak, but she did send him a wary smile which he returned. They continued hanging the clothes, liking the silence that filled the space between them. Carol liked that she and Tyreese didn't have to speak much nowadays, but that they still understood each other fine. The time that they had spent alone with Judith, Mika and Lizzie had given them a chance to bond and when he had forgiven her for what she had done to Karen and David, the two of them had become something akin to friends.

Now, she couldn't imagine her life without either one of the people in their group, but she and Tyreese always seemed to have some kind of an understanding, a little different from what she and Daryl had. The feelings she had for Daryl ran as deep as any mother's feeling would run for their child. It was perhaps a little strange and at times these last few months he had tried to push her away, but she had stubbornly remained by his side and kept an eye on him.

Carol thought back to the hospital again; to when Beth had been shot through the head right in front of them and Daryl hadn't hesitated even a second before retaliating, killing Dawn before the woman could even say that she hadn't meant to shoot the blonde girl. The thing was that Carol had been there for Daryl when he had returned after Merle had died. He might not have said anything to her directly, or anyone else for that matter, but they had all understood what had probably gone down in the end. Even when that had happened, Carol hadn't seen Daryl act the way he had acted when Beth had been shot.

Not only that, but even after he had carried her out of the hospital and Maggie had collapsed, Daryl had _refused_ to let go of her body until they had gotten somewhere remotely safe and he had told them that they needed to clean her up and patch her up so that she could be buried properly. Carol remembered that she had had a small conversation with Glenn and Tyreese regarding Daryl's _need_ to find Beth a coffin and then his insistence on digging her grave himself. She hadn't completely comprehended the extent of Daryl's feelings for the young girl then, but as the month's passed, it was pretty obvious how much Daryl had cared abut her, which only made Carol feel guiltier for surviving.

The back door to the house opened and Carol glanced back over her shoulder, only to see Beth standing on the small steps. For a moment Carol froze and looked over at Tyreese who didn't speak either when he looked back at Beth. Then he continued putting up the clothes for drying and Carol turned back to her work as well.

Behind her, she heard Beth move on the steps before sitting down. Carol could feel the young girl's eyes boring into her neck, but she understood what Tyreese had silently told her. They needed to wait for Beth to come to them, just like Rick had instructed them to do. It wasn't worth risking to push her away by scaring her. They had all seen Beth's reaction a couple of nights ago when Maggie had asked her what she had been doing while she had been alone with Morgan. As far as Carol knew, Beth still wasn't talking to Maggie and Maggie herself had not dared to approach her younger sister again. However, it seemed like Beth had formed an easy friendship with Tara but the brunette was yet to give some insight in what Beth was actually thinking. Carol understood that it couldn't be easy for Beth to just accept them all and when she thought back at her own reaction that first night that they had seen Beth alive, she knew that she had probably scared the poor girl.

It didn't change the fact that Carol loved just seeing Beth alive again. Every time she saw the young girl smiling, it felt as if the hope that had once seemed so lost had been returned to her once again. The only thing she could hope for now was that time would heal all wounds and that Beth would approach them herself when she was ready for it.

Carol looked back again, at Beth who was still sitting on the steps silently watching her and Tyreese and she couldn't help but feel that glimmer of hope once again flutter up inside of her.

* * *

Beth watched the woman who had embraced her that first night hang the clothes up for drying together with the man who, as far as she knew, was named Tyreese. She had been picking up on names these past few days and Tara had been helpful with describing the way the newcomers looked so that she could try and connect the names to the people.

The woman, who Beth was sure was named Carol, kept glancing back at her from time to time, but Beth knew that she was feeling just as awkward as Beth was.

Beth had spent the day with Tara once again, finding it easy to communicate with the young woman who knew what questions to ask and what topics to avoid. They had been walking the perimeter of the face furthest away from the house and Beth had confessed that she didn't know how to begin a conversation with anyone other that Tara, Michonne, Rick or Carl. So far, those four were the only people she had been able to talk to without getting angry at herself for not remembering, or getting angry at the other person for no apparent reason at all.

It was all bottled up inside of her, the anger, and she didn't know what to do about it. Tara had suggested that she take her time and get to know everyone slowly, one at a time and to Beth, that suggestion seemed to make the most sense.

“You don't have to start with Maggie,” Tara had told her. “She's gonna give you time to come to her yourself. She won't be pushing you, unless you show her that you want to be pushed.”

So Beth had decided to take Tara's advice to heart and slowly approach the newcomers, one at a time. She hadn't thought much about the woman who had embraced her so tightly when she had first met the group, but she knew that if there was one place she should begin, it was with Carol. There was just something about the older woman– how she had kissed all over Beth's face when she had seen her– that made it clear that she had cared a lot about Beth before. Sure, everyone who had been a part of her family had cared about her, if their reactions to seeing her alive were any indication, but Carol had seemed so utterly destroyed when she had realized that Beth didn't remember them.

Beth watched Carol and Tyreese hang clothes for drying and decided to finally speak.

“What's your name?” she asked, even though she already knew their names. It was better to start fresh; better to turn a blank page and build relationships from scratch instead of always thinking about disappointing them because she wasn't the same.

She watched as Carol froze with a sheet in her hands, clearly having not expected Beth to actually say something to them. The older woman turned her head in Beth's direction and Beth's eyes zeroed in on how Carol seemed to clutch the sheet just a little tighter.

Tyreese was the first one to reply though. He let go of the sweater he had been holding and slowly approached Beth, sticking his hand out for her to shake, “Tyreese, but some in our group call me Ty. Tyreese is fine though.”

“Tyreese,” Beth repeated, nodding slightly as she shook his hand firmly. “It's nice to meet you officially. Tara had told me a little about you and your sister... Uh, Sasha, right?”

“Yeah,” Tyreese chuckled lightly. “Sasha's my baby sister, even if she acts like she's so much older than me.”

Again, Beth nodded, but didn't reply. She looked over at Carol, who was still holding on to the sheet tightly. The older woman seemed to be avoiding to look into her eyes, but after a few moments, she finally met Beth's gaze. Much like Tyreese, she put the sheet down in the basket again and walked toward Beth, a little more hesitantly than Tyreese had.

Beth watched as Carol swallowed before holding her hand out too. “I'm Carol,” she introduced herself, her voice sounding a little thick. Beth gently shook Carol's hand, causing Carol to inhale sharply and look away. “I'm sorry,” Carol said. “I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but it's just...” she trailed off.

“It's difficult to comprehend that I'm alive,” Beth clarified softly. “I get that.”

“I don't want to make you uncomfortable,” Carol said, finally looking back at her. There were tears in the woman's eyes and Beth wondered how long it had been since she had properly cried, if one didn't count that night that they had been reunited. “I'm sorry if I am,” Carol continued and this time, her eyes remained on Beth.

Beth took a small breath, mentally preparing herself to be strong, like Morgan had told her several times that she was. “That's actually why I'm here,” she explained. “I wanted to apologize for the way I've been actin'.” She cleared her throat a little, glancing down at the ground between them before looking back up again, at both of them this time. “I pushed you away that first night because I got scared and I can only imagine what that must've been like for you. You've been here for a few days now and I haven't even tried talkin' to ya yet, and I'm sorry for that.”

“Beth, you have nothing to be sorry for,” Carol said, but Beth only shook her head.

“I want to get to know you guys,” she admitted. “All of you,” she said, giving a pointed look at Tyreese as well. “I just didn't know where to begin and then I realized that there really isn't a good place to start. If I keep waiting for a good opportunity to come, I'll be waitin' forever and I don't want to lose more time than we've already lost. I want to get to know you.”

Her throat was dry and she desperately needed a glass of water, but she just swallowed a bit so that it wouldn't get too hoarse later. “I'm just gonna ask you to be patient with me, please?” she finally asked.

It felt like years passed before Carol and Tyreese looked at each other and smiled lightly. Tyreese looked back at Beth and nodded, “No pressure, Beth. Take all the time you need.”

“We'll get to know each other more and more as time passes,” Carol agreed, a smile on her lips as well. “Just... Is it okay if I... If I hug you?” Instantly Beth saw the worry on Carol's face. The older woman clearly thought that she might have overstepped her boundaries so Beth did the only thing that felt right to do.

She took a step forward and wrapped her arms around Carol's form. Immediately, Carol returned the embrace, her hands resting on Beth's shoulder blades as she pulled Beth in a little closer. The sense of security surprised Beth a little, but she quickly realized that  the touch was  _familiar_ too. She tightened her grip a little and closed her eyes, burying her face in the crook of Carol's shoulder, trying to will her brain to cooperate with her for once.

She  _wanted_ to remember and when nothing came to her, she felt the disappointment set in. Carol must have sensed the way her body had tensed a little, because she pulled away ever so slowly and smiled down at Beth.

“It's okay,” the older woman told her, touching her cheek softly. “I understand.”

_I understand that you don't know me._

_I understand that you want to._

_I understand that you need time and I will give it to you._

Those were the things that Beth picked up on as she looked into Carol's eyes and found herself bowing her head down in a small, perhaps a little awkward, nod.

“I'll see you later,” Beth said softly. She looked over at Tyreese, who seemed happy for the way the conversation that they had been having had turned out. Offering him the same nod as she had given Carol, Beth finally turned around and began walking back to the house again.

Before she entered, she looked back one last time, only to see Tyreese smiling down at Carol who was freely crying, despite the smile that was painted on her face as well.

It made Beth feel a little better than she had before.

* * *

Daryl sat outside on the porch, crossbow next to him, his last cigarette between his fingertips, still unlit. He stared ahead, at what he didn't know, but it was a calm night, much like every night had been since they had gotten to the farmhouse.

He still couldn't believe that a week had already passed and he had been able to avoid interacting with Beth completely. There had been no run-ins in the hallways, despite the two of them sleeping in room opposite each other, no conversations, no times when she needed help or he needed to know where something was.

The only thing that there had been plenty of, had been _glances_.

Usually, he was the one who sneaked one or two her way when he saw her walk out of the house together with Tara, or when she stood talking to Morgan about something in hushed tones. Sometimes, he could swear that he felt her eyes on him too, but when he looked her way, she was always looking at something else, which only made him feel pathetic and maybe even a little crazy. Was he really imagining things or was Beth just better at being stealthy than him?

The thought made him chuckle bitterly and he shook his head at himself for the way he was acting. He was a grown ass man that shouldn't be wondering whether a teenage girl (She was still a teenager right? As far as he knew, she should be about nineteen now, considering that she'd been eighteen when they had been separated.) was watching him in secret like he was watching her.

He felt almost like a creep when he thought about it like that, and considering that Beth didn't even know him now, it made it all that much creepier.

For a moment, he allowed himself to think about what would have been different if Beth had never actually forgotten him and the others. If she had been waiting for them to cross her path again and be reunited with them. Would she have embraced him, like he had wanted to do so desperately, but never had a chance to do at the hospital? Would she have told him that she had missed him and ask him if he had missed her?

(He had. So much that he was still actually missing her.)

The door behind him opened and he froze on the spot, wondering who it was that had come out of the house. The others had been inside, eating a late dinner together like civilized people and he had told them all that he would sit outside and keep watch, even though no one really thought they needed it.

The week that had been so quiet after all, but he wasn't willing to take any risks and when Rick had met his gaze, he knew that his brother in everything but blood felt the same way.

Beth didn't eat dinner with the rest of them; she hadn't been doing it since that second night when Maggie had asked her about what she had been doing during their time apart. The young blonde always ate dinner alone, holed up in her bedroom, or together with Tara, who was the only person other than Morgan who seemed to be allowed into Beth's room so far.

Sure, Carl and Michonne seemed to be allowed inside too, but the latter had never gotten around to it, too busy going on runs during the day and too tired to do so in the night, while Carl generally just spoke to Beth while they were outside and the two of them had a moment to spare from their own assignments.

Beth was always walking around, checking the perimeter, even though they all did it every day without being told to do so. She would say good morning to Rick every morning, let Carl hug her and then proceed to spend the rest of her time alternating between talking to Tara and discussing things with Morgan. He wondered if she would ever be as close to him as they had started to become before they had been separated.

“Hey,” Carol said, sitting down next to him on the porch. There was a plate in her hand and she gestured for him to take it. “Brought you some. Figured that since you've decided to exile yourself out here, you might have gotten hungry.”

“I ain't exilin' myself,” Daryl muttered, but he took the plate anyway. “Ya don't need to take care of me.”

“Are you sure that I don't?” Carol asked, giving him a pointed look. “You've been very quiet this week and I'm worried.”

“Worryin' won't do ya no good,” Daryl said, taking a bite from the deer meat she had brought him. “I'm fine.”

Carol shot him one of her looks that told him just how much she didn't believe what he was saying. He just looked at her as blankly as he could before proceeding to stare ahead, much like had been doing before she had joined him on the porch.

They sat in silence while Daryl ate and Daryl found his mind once again drifting to the blonde that was probably upstairs in her room already. Before he could think any further and wonder what she was doing there, Carol spoke.

“You should try talking to Beth,” she told him.

He froze with a piece of meat halfway into his mouth. Slowly, he lowered it to the plate again and looked at the woman sitting next to him, cleaning his fingers by licking them.

“No point of doin' that,” he bit out. “She don't remember me, or any of us.”

“I talked to her today,” Carol said, narrowing her eyes at him. He knew that Carol could tell that he was putting up the walls around himself faster than ever before. “Tyreese and I talked about letting her come to us instead, like Rick told us all to and it worked. She told me she wants to get to know us.”

“Good for you,” he replied, turning away from her.

“Daryl, you shouldn't do this to yourself,” Carol sighed. “We all know that you care about her, just as much as we all do... Maybe even _more_.”

_She ain't got no clue, does she, lil' brother? Tha way ya been stalkin' the lil' girl with ya pervy lil' eyes?_

It had been a while since Daryl had heard Merle's voice inside his head. Since what had happened in the hospital, it was usually Beth's voice echoing in there, so he was surprised to hear Merle  speaking to him now.

Daryl decided that it was better not to reply to Carol and instead tried to ignore her completely. It proved very difficult though, especially since Carol practically tore the plate from his hands to get his attention. When he met her eyes, he could see her anger shining through and he tried to remember the last time she had looked at him like that.

Probably never.

But now, she was and Daryl honestly couldn't put his finger on what it was that had made her react so angrily toward him.

“I wasn't done with tha',” he said, pointing at the food.

Carol's eyes narrowed, “I'm telling you that you should try to talk to Beth.”

“Ya ain't my goddamn keeper, Carol,” Daryl snapped at her, but his voice was low so that the people inside wouldn't hear them. Now he was the one staring her down, but she didn't falter under his gaze. “I don't need ya to fuckin' watch me like I'm some kid. I can do whatever the hell I want an' I don't _want_ to talk to Beth.”

“That's a lie and we both know it,” Carol said. “Whatever it is that is wearing you down, that is keeping you from going to her... You have to do something for you too sometimes, but more importantly, you need to give her a chance to get to know you again. We all owe her that much.”

“All she knows 'bout us is that we buried her,” Daryl glared. “Ya heard her that night, how upset she was. She called Maggie out on her stupid ass question an' she sure as hell showed that she won't be wantin' to talk to any of us about anything any time soon!”

“She talked to me and Tyreese today and told us she wants to get to know us, Daryl! Or did you not hear me when I told you so before?” Carol asked him.

“I heard ya perfectly fine, I just think it's her tryin' to be nice,” Daryl sneered. “I wouldn' be surprised if she hates us for what we did.”

“We thought she was dead,” Carol tried to defend their actions but Daryl only shook his head.

“Doesn't change anythin',” he said. “She wasn't an' now she's prob'ly permanently damaged or somethin'... _Would be just my luck_...”

The last part he had mumbled so low that he wasn't sure Carol had heard him. It seemed like he was finally able to get through to her though, because she shoved the plate back into his hands and stood up.

“As far as I could tell, Beth seemed perfectly fine, considering everything,” Carol told him as she brushed her pants with her hands. “You're just being stubborn and hurting yourself in the process while trying to avoid her. Don't think that she won't come to you just because you act like she's a damn walker or something that you don't want to get close to.” She began walking back to the front door, but paused and turned back to look at him again. “And I might not be your keeper, Daryl, but I _am_ your friend, and as your friend, I'll always be there to remind you that you're making a mistake when I see that your are.”

With that final word Carol walked inside again and left Daryl alone on the porch. He glared down at his plate and the small piece of food that was left on it and suddenly didn't feel very hungry anymore.

Carol was wrong, he tried to tell himself. It was better that he gave Beth space and didn't ruin her life by somehow getting all tangled up in whatever it was that he was feeling for her. She would be better off without having to deal with him and he sure as hell would be better off not having to confront the things he was feeling for the girl... Things that Carol, Rick and Michonne and maybe everyone else had already picked up on.

He sighed as he put the plate to the side and picked up his last cigarette again, watching it silently, knowing that he might need it more on a rainy day when his nerves finally get the better of him.

Yet, he lit it and put it between his lips, dragging in the deadly smoke as he once again bitterly imagined how things would have been different, if Beth would only remember what she meant to him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in this chapter we got some more insight on how Carol feels too. I might have some scenes like that where I go to other characters to get their point of view, even though the main part of the story will be about Beth and Daryl and their views on everything.
> 
> Oh, and I almost forgot! Another guest reviewer on fanfiction caught a small detail I had in the previous chapter, regarding something that Michonne knew about Daryl. I'm a little surprised that people didn't ask about it, but I'll just say that it's a clue to a future chapter! :)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and I really hope that you comment! Kind words are what drive me to keep writing and motivate me to get to the good parts sooner! ;)
> 
> Many hugs!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of Beth's surprising new skills are shown while Daryl goes on a run and finally snaps at someone who only means well. Beth makes a decision regarding the man that seems to be avoiding her at all costs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people! Due to the wonderful response and amount of comments I got on the previous chapter, I got the motivation to finish this one quicker and post it just as quick! Normally, I keep the chapter with me for at least five days before I post it, but since I promised a chapter if the comments were good, I couldn't go back on that! :)
> 
> I enjoyed writing this one and I hope you guys think it's okay too. It shows some of Beth's skills (that she might not have had on the show, but she's gonna have it in my fic because I can honestly see her being that BAMF) and I hope you'll like it! :)
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who has read, commented, given kudos and subscribed so far!
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 6

Beth gently stirred the pot of porridge above the wood-driven stove, listening to the conversation that was going on around the dinner table.

“I really hope they get all the things they need,” Tara told Carl as she leaned back on her chair. “I can't wait for them to get the water running in this house so I can get a proper shower!”

“Yeah, you just wait until they come back and find out we decided to be lazy all day and not work anything outside,” Sasha grinned at the other woman. “Ty is gonna be so pissed that he decided to go along on this run.”

“You lot all deserve a break,” Morgan told them from his seat at the head of the table. “You've been working your asses off to get those pits dug and the wall up. Rick and the others can always take a break tomorrow.”

“Yeah, I don't think that's gonna happen,” Michonne muttered, shifting Judith on her lap. The toddler giggled and grabbed some of her hair, pulling it, but it only made Michonne smile down at her.

Beth smiled to herself as she continued to stir the pot.

This morning had been one of those rare ones where Morgan had been forced to come and wake her up because she had decided to sleep in a bit. He had told her that Rick had taken most of the men with him on a run because Eugene, the man with the mullet had figured out a way to get the generator in the basement repaired and started and also fix the pipelines from the farm's own water reservoir. Eugene had apparently come to Morgan the previous night and asked for permission to repair the things, after having explained that he had spent most of the week downstairs, figuring out how the generator worked. Morgan had talked to Rick about it and they had both agreed that having running water in the house would be a good thing before winter came along.

Beth for one couldn't wait.

Because of her condition she hadn't been able to contribute at all when it came to fixing the generator, although she was fairly sure that she hadn't known anything about generators before she lost her memories either. Morgan was handy when it came to stuff around the house, but as soon as electricity or something mechanic needed tinkering, he only knew the basics. That naturally meant that when they had gotten to the farm house and made sure that it was clean of both walkers and dust, they had both decided that they didn't need the running water or the electricity, especially not considering that the house had a back-up stove that was run purely on wood.

This morning the news of the possibility to have running water had thrilled Beth more than anything, so she had gotten up and insisted that she help Carol make breakfast to the rest of the household. Usually, she and Morgan would just fill up buckets of water from the well in the backyard and have them stocked in the bathroom upstairs, which was the only one they used. However, now that there were so many people in the house, they would need to clean the bathroom downstairs as well and maybe even the small one that barely fit one person in the basement. Running water would surely be a savior to them all.

“Noah, will you help with the plates?” Carol asked and Beth glanced at the boy who was surely about her age as he stood from the table where he had been sitting next to Carl.

“Yeah Noah, help with the plates,” the younger boy snickered.

Carol shot him a look, “And you, Carl, can go ahead and help him.” Carl's smirk fell, but he stood up without protest and helped Noah.

Two days had passed since Beth had approached Carol about getting to know them all and they had all been taking it fairly slow so far. Noah had introduced himself to Beth yesterday, but there was just something about him that seemed so familiar that she had been able to start an easy conversation about nothing in particular with him.

“How's it going, Beth?” Carl asked, looking down at the porridge she was stirring.

“Should be done soon,” she told him, a small smile on her lips.

“I never thought I would miss somethin' like porridge,” Noah confessed, inhaling through his nose. “God, that smells good!”

“Lucky for you guys, lil' Lady was the one who basically ordered me to take several bags of it with me on one of our runs,” Morgan spoke from the table. “She insisted, especially since the truck could carry it.”

“Well done, Beth,” Carl praised as he took a deep breath himself, licking his lips at the wonderful aroma.

Beth blushed, not really knowing what to say, and thankfully, Carol stepped in, telling the boys to sit down again. “There's some leftover meat from two days ago that needs to be eaten unless we want it to go bad,” Carol told them.

“I don't mind some meat,” Carl replied, standing up to get himself a fork and a knife in addition to the spoon that Noah had set out. When he sat down again, he began twisting and turning the knife in his hand, almost absentmindedly.

Michonne held Judith a little closer to her and shot Carl a look, “Carl, don't play knife thrower when Judith is around. Accidents happen.”

Carl instantly put the knife on the table, without asking any questions whatsoever and Beth wondered just how much they all must have been through together for Carl to have such respect for Michonne.

Beth had been observing them all these last few days and as far as she could tell, Michonne and Rick were close, so maybe that too had been passed on to Carl? Sometimes, she could see Rick linger in the background when Michonne walked away from him, but the man still wore his wedding band, so perhaps he just wasn't ready to let go of the woman who had been his wife, Lori.

Carl had told her about Lori and from what Beth gathered, she had been fairly close with her once. Not remembering her, pained her, but at the same time, she felt a little relieved that she didn't have all the deaths that had occurred hanging over her head and sticking into her heart.

“Speaking of knife throwing,” Morgan said, causing Beth to look up at him, a little startled. He smiled at her gently and she narrowed her eyes at him, wondering what he was doing. “You should start trainin' again, lil' Lady.”

There was a beat of silence before Beth cleared her throat. “Uh, yeah, maybe a little later,” she agreed, already feeling the blush creeping up on her cheeks again. “I'll get the knives out of my closet.”

“Wait a second,” Sasha said, leaning over the table to get a better look at Beth. “You know how to throw knives?”

“No. Fucking. Way!” Carl said, staring wide eyes at Beth. Everyone in the room seemed to have turned their attention to her now and she bit her lip, glancing down at her feet. She didn't exactly like the extra attention Morgan's comment had gotten her, mostly because she had enjoyed just standing there quietly, observing them.

“ _Carl_...” Michonne warned, looking at the boy.

“I mean: No _fricking_ way!” Carl corrected himself quickly.

“Better,” Michonne smiled.

“And to answer your question, yes. The lil' Lady here sure is a natural at it too,” Morgan said, which made everyone turn to him instead. “When she got a bit better physically, we found some real throwing knives in a case along the way toward DC, maybe a month or so before we found this place,” he explained. “We took 'em with us, not really knowing anything about them. I mean, I had thrown a knife or two once, but I wasn't the very best at it. Used to play darts back home sometimes and I figured it couldn't be much different. When we started playfully throwing in the woods, a walked stumbled out and the lil' lady reacted on instinct and threw one of the knives. Got it right in the left eye,” Morgan told them.

Beth remembered that day as if it had been yesterday. She had panicked a little at first when the walker had come out of nowhere, mainly because she was afraid that there might be a herd coming or something. She had thrown the knife and gotten her smaller one that she always had in her belt out, prepared to fight off more of them, but none had come. When she had faced Morgan, he had been looking at her in awe as he walked over to the walker and looked at the found, pointing out to her that she had hit it on the first try. After that, Morgan had set up some targets and she had tried aiming and throwing, but it was almost like the more she aimed, the less she hit. Morgan figured it had to do with the pressure she felt at hitting the target, so he suggested she just close her eyes and throw. When she did that, she hit the can in the middle and after that, she just continued to work on instinct. Morgan taught her what little he knew about it and she became quite good at it, using a strength that she hadn't even known was there in the beginning.

“She hasn't been trainin' for a while so she's probably a bit rusty now, aren't you, lil' Lady?” Morgan teased.

Beth turned to look at him and smirked, “Instincts don't just go away, Morgan.”

“She's got that right,” Michonne agreed.

“Although, it would be awesome to see,” Carl pointed out, looking over at Beth again. “What do ya say, Beth? You up for the challenge?”

“Yeah, show us those skills that Morgan's telling us about,” Noah said.

Beth shrugged, “I don't see why not. Since Morgan thinks I need to train again, I might as well.”

She was a little surprised to see Carl and Noah's faces light up like they did, but they really seemed to be genuinely excited to see what she got when it came to knife throwing.

“Maybe you can teach us something?” Carl wondered.

“Maybe,” Beth nodded, “after breakfast.”

“That's right,” Carol said. “You have to eat before you can do anything and I think it'll do you good to be prepared in any way possible. We don't want to get soft and be unprepared if anything were to happen, even if we are safe for the time being.”

There was a murmur of agreements around the table and Beth finally put out the fire, picking up the pot of porridge. She turned around to the people she was slowly getting to know and smiled happily, “Who's hungry?”

* * *

Daryl closed the door to the truck as quietly as possible before loading his crossbow. He looked over at Rick, who had been driving and watched as he signaled for the others who had driven in Tyreese's jeep to be equally quiet. The engine to the car was cut off and Tyreese stepped out of the driver's seat, taking his rifle out of the car. Abraham and Glenn stepped out next with Eugene in a tow. Daryl turned back around and looked suspiciously down the parking lot, assessing the mall that they had arrived at.

Eugene had found it on one of his maps that he had scavenged during their many months on the road. Daryl had never really cared much for the maps that the fake scientist kept in his backpack, and as long as he pulled his own weight, Daryl had always thought that he could take a whole printer with him if he wanted to as well. Just as long as Daryl didn't have to carry his useless crap around.

But naturally, even though Eugene might have been a fake _scientist_ it didn't mean that the man wasn't clever. The maps were once again proving to be useful because they used them frequently now that they had a place that they would return to. Mapping out the runs they went on was good, especially considering how difficult gas was to come around nowadays. They could make sure that their vehicles had enough to travel the entire way to their destination and back to the farmhouse. Along the way, they would stop if they thought it was safe and try to gather up gas from any abandoned cars  they crossed paths with.

A  loud  _slam_ behind him caused Daryl to swirl around with his bow raised and his eyes immediately tried to seek out the potential threat. It seemed like the others in his group had the same idea, because they were all respectively pointing their weapons at Eugene, who was holding his hands up in surrender.

It seemed like the mullet-man had slammed the door a little too loudly since he clearly didn't remember that being silent was one of the main rules they had established when it came to going on runs.

“Sorry,” he said, giving them all a sheepish look and Daryl couldn't help but roll his eyes as he turned back around to face the mall.

“There's a sign there that lists all the stores in the mall,” Glenn said as the group gather closer to each other. “Never thought those were very useful until now...”

“There's a hardware store on the first floor,” Eugene pointed out.

“Which means we gotta stay as quiet as possible,” Abraham nodded. “There's no tellin' how many walkers might be in there.”

“Aren't we gonna try an' lure them out here?” Eugene frowned.

“Maybe that's a better idea,” Daryl agreed.

“Still no way of knowing how many are in there,” Glenn said. “What if there are too many? We can't just shoot them all since it'll draw more attention to us.”

“How 'bout Abraham an' I go in with Eugene,” Daryl suggested. “Glenn, Rick and Tyreese, you watch our backs and Eugene shows us everythin' he needs for the pipes. We kill all the walkers tha' get in our way, an' try to get the things out as fast as we can.”

I t wasn't the best plan in the world, but if would have to do since the others nodded in agreement. Daryl looked over at Eugene who looked a little pale.

“Ya ain't got nothin' to worry 'bout,” he told him. “Ya got your knife an' we all got your back in there.”

“Y-Yeah,” Eugene stuttered in agreement before raising his head. “ _Yes_ ,” he said, with a little more conviction than before. Daryl turned toward the mall again and sighed. This would be a long day, but at least looking for material while keeping everyone safe would keep his mind off of the blonde he had dreamed so vividly about the previous night.

* * *

“Okay, how are we gonna go about this?” Noah asked, clapping his hands together. Beth looked at him curiously before smiling and shaking her head.

She, Carl and Noah had gone out in the backyard with Morgan who was putting up a board for Beth to practice on. Carol and the other women had stayed behind in the house to clean up a little but had told them that they too would very much like to see Beth throw knives.

“No particular way to go about it,” Morgan told the younger man. “You boys just stand back and let the lil' Lady awe you with her skills, while I make sure that the technique I showed her is still good.”

“I thought you said she threw on instinct?” Carl frowned.

“I do,” Beth nodded as she opened her box of throwing knives. It was almost a complete set, with only three bigger knives missing, which left seven perfectly usable knives behind for her. “Morgan just likes to think that he was the one who taught me everything I know.”

“I never claimed such a thing, lil' Lady! Stop making me look bad in front of the new people,” Morgan said, but there was a hint of amusement in his tone.

Beth smiled, picking up one of the smaller knives, feeling the weight in her hand, “I'm just joking. Morgan has taught me quite a few useful things, but knife throwing sort of came too easily to me.” She turned around and faced Noah and Carl. “I always thought it might be something I could do before I got shot... So, did I?”

“Did you what?” Carl asked for clarification.

“Know how to throw knives?” Beth said.

“No, not that I know,” Carl admitted, a small frown on his lips. Beth could tell that there were some things floating around in the young boy's mind, but she didn't want to pry. If he thought it was important, he would tell her, she figured.

“But you did have good aim,” Noah informed her. “You saved my life once. All you had was a gun, but you got a head shot in on every single walker that came at you.”

Beth tried searching for the memory inside her head, but it seemed like the black veil didn't feel like moving at all today. She looked over at Morgan and met his gaze. He could clearly tell what she had been trying to do and offered her a small smile of consolation. Seven months of only being with each other would certainly give one the time to get to know the other person's tells and Beth knew that Morgan had become somewhat of an expert when it came to telling that she had tried to remember something and failed.

“So you _did_ have good aim before then,” he teased, trying to lighten the mood a little. “Damn, now I certainly can't take credit.”

“There are other things you _can_ take credit for,” Beth told him. “Like saving my life.”

“You saved yourself, lil' Lady,” Morgan told her, this time a little more serious. “Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.”

A beat passed and no one spoke. Beth could feel both Noah and Carl watching her and Morgan after their little exchange and she tried not to pay any attention to it. She held the knife in her hand and turned toward the board where Morgan had made a mark in the middle with a circle. Taking out two more of her knives, she turned to face the board and Morgan moved out of the way wordlessly. Without saying anything, Beth drew one of her hands back and threw one of the knives toward the tree, letting it fly through the air before embedding itself inside the circle that Morgan had drawn with a small _thunk_. It wasn't perfectly in the middle, but it was close and she heard Carl let out an awed whistle.

She smirked to herself before throwing the other two, hitting a bit closer to the middle with one of them, while the other one hit the line of the circle. Frowning, she tilted her head sideways and inspected her hits from afar. If it had been a human she was trying to hit, she definitely would have ended up injuring them with her hits, but a walker might still be able to get away if she didn't hit them in the head with the knives. This frustrated her to no end, but she shrugged either way when she turned to look at Morgan again.

“You know you can do better than that,” he told her. She walked over to her case again and took out the remaining four throwing knives. The blades were sharper on these four, but at the same time a little thinner. They were lighter to hold as well and Beth liked them more than the first three she had used that were a little bigger in size.

She held three of the knives in her left hand, preferring her right when it came to throwing and looked at the board. Inhaling deeply, she began throwing.

_Thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk._

The four knives were all inside the circle, much closer to the middle than the previous three and Beth couldn't help but grin in satisfaction.

“Woah!” Carl exclaimed, clapping his hands. Noah clapped too and it was first when Beth turned around that she noticed that the others had come out to watch too.

Michonne, Tara and Sasha all looked impressed at her while baby Judith seemed to follow her brother's example, clapping happily without even knowing what they were clapping for. Beside Tara, Rosita, the woman who was always hanging around with Abraham stood, and even she nodded curtly at Beth with a grin.

“I wouldn't mind having you by my side if we ever got attacked,” she told Beth, who could only smile back.

“You're very good with those,” Carol agreed. “Amazing, really.”

Beth was about to thank them when the back door opened.  They all turned around and stared at Maggie who stood on the steps, looking from Beth, to the tree where the knives were embedded in the board that Morgan had hung up and back to Beth.

Beth swallowed tightly and stared at her older sister. She still hadn't spoken to her after that disastrous dinner over a week ago and so far, Maggie had been avoiding her as much as Beth had been avoiding Maggie.

Maggie had been upstairs in her room all morning. Beth had asked Morgan whether her sister had gone on the run as well, but apparently, Maggie had wanted to stay behind today. It seemed like Maggie had decided on finally trying to approach Beth again, but now when she stood there in front of her, her older sister didn't speak a single word.

Beth wanted to do something to break the awful tension that suddenly seemed to be everywhere around them. She shifted a little and looked over at the knives and then back at her sister.

“Hi,” she finally breathed out.

Maggie, along with everyone else around them, seemed to freeze and hesitate a little. “Hi,” Maggie spoke, tilting her head a little as if to get a better look at Beth, clearly searching her face.

“Are you any good at knife throwing?” Beth asked, almost smacking herself in the head afterward. Out of all the things she could have said to try and ease the tension, she had to go with that. She felt so silly suddenly and she worried how Maggie would react.

Her sister though, didn't seem to find the question the least bit silly. Or at least, Beth didn't think so, because Maggie closed her eyes and let out a harsh breath. When she opened her eyes again, Beth could see that she was desperately trying not to cry, but there was a smile on her lips.

“No,” Maggie shook her head, her voice a little thicker than before. “I've always preferred using my gun.”

Her sister's reply was so simple, without a hint of animosity, that Beth couldn't help but slowly smile back at her.

“You wanna watch?” she asked, walking toward the knives, pulling them out of the board. She turned back to Maggie, who nodded, sitting down on the steps next to Michonne and Judith. The smile, albeit still a little sad, was still on her face. Maggie put her elbows on her knees and rested her chin in her hands, looking intently at Beth.

“Yeah,” she replied. “I'd like that.”

At Maggie's words and Beth's calm nature, everyone else around them seemed to relax again. Beth looked at the ground, not only knowing that she could no longer avoid her sister, but also knowing that she  _didn't want to_ avoid her sister anymore. She had been angry that night when she had retaliated in such a way when Maggie had asked her what she had been up to, but she had had time to work on things and process having them, her family, close again. Sure, it was going to take a little time, but if she was ready to move forward with everyone else, then why not try to speak with her sister too?

Beth glanced up at Maggie again, smiled and then swiftly turned, throwing one of the lighter knives.  She leaned back and looked at the knife. The smile that was already on her lips only widened when she saw that the knife was embedded perfectly in the middle of the circle.

* * *

Apparently, someone had already cleaned out the mall before them. Or at least someone had left a door open so that the walkers than had probably been inside had been able to walk out and wander off somewhere.

Daryl released his bolt and the seventh walker he had seen since entering the mall fell, the arrow embedded in its left eye.  He walked over to it, used to the bad smell that always surrounded the dead and pulled out the bold, wiping the arrow-head on his pants. He turned around and motioned for Eugene and Rick to walk closer.

“There ain't many walkers in here,” he pointed out, knowing that the rest of them had already made the same assessment. “We should call back Glenn and the others.”

“You're right,” Rick nodded. “There's no point in splittin' up if there aren't that many walkers 'round.”

“Or you could always send them to the other stores to check for other supplies,” Eugene said.

“We can do that together once we get all the things we need,” Rick told him. “Daryl, do you mind getting' them?”

Daryl nodded curtly before loading his crossbow as a precaution.  He walked out of the hardware store.  He could see Glenn, Tyreese and Abraham standing by the escalators that were no longer working. Glenn looked up when he saw him approaching, so Daryl lifted his hand and motioned for them to come with two fingers.

“Ya see any walkers?” Daryl asked, but they all shook their heads.

“Killed two that stumbled out of the other store,” Abraham pointed at two bodies a little further away. “Haven't seen any other than them.”

“Good,” Daryl nodded. “We stick together in the hardware store 'til we get what we need. Then we can check the other shops.” Then nodded and followed him into the store again. “We better stay quiet just in case. Tyreese and Abraham, you go to the left and Glenn and I'll go right. Eugene and Rick are already inside somewhere, so don't go shootin' them on accident.”

“Don't worry,” Abraham snorted. “We all want a hot shower.” He and Tyreese moved out, weapons ready and Daryl simply shook his head at them before turning to Glenn, who was watching him almost expectantly.

“Let's go,” he grunted, stepping around the younger man, who followed.

A t first he didn't think much of Glenn's strange behavior. They found Rick, Eugene, Abraham and Tyreese in the middle of the store where Eugene was going over his list and pointing at things for them to grab. When they carried out the things they would need, he felt Glenn's eyes burning holes into the back of his neck but he chose to ignore it either way.

They got almost everything they needed from the hardware store that their cars could carry, along with some dry food that wasn't too expired and could still be edible.  Tyreese's jeep was full of both material and other stuff that they had found, so on the way back home, Glenn, who was the smallest in size, would have to squeeze into Morgan's truck together with Rick and Daryl.

“I'm just gonna get one quick look at the map, in case there are any smaller stores on the way back,” Rick told Daryl and Glenn before walking off to the jeep. Daryl put his crossbow inside and turned back around to look at Glenn, who was biting his lip and looking at him nervously.

“What?” Daryl bit out, narrowing his eyes at his friend. “Why do ya keep lookin' at me like that?”

“Uh, well, you see... Maggie and I talked last night,” Glenn mumbled. “She thought that I should see if you were doing alright... Considering.”

“Considerin' _what_?” Daryl frowned. He didn't particularly like the idea that Maggie and Glenn had been talking about him but he already had an idea on what their conversation had been about.

“You're avoiding Beth, man,” Glenn finally sighed. “I didn't wanna say anything, but–”

“Then ya probably shouldn't,” Daryl snapped. “It ain't any of your concern and I'm fuckin' tired of everyone tellin' me what to do!”

Glenn looked a little taken aback by his sudden outburst, but it had been eating up inside of him ever since Carol had talked to him that night and told him that he should try to approach Beth.

“Everythin' alright here?” Rick asked as he walked back to them, eyebrow raised. Apparently, Daryl had raised his voice a little too much toward the end because he had gotten the attention of the other men as well.

“We're _peachy_ ,” Daryl bit out, walking around the truck. “I'm drivin'.” He got into the car without another word and stared ahead, wishing he had had a cigarette to calm his nerves.

* * *

Beth walked alongside Maggie on the outside of the fence. The two of them hadn't spoken much yet, but Beth had been the one to suggest that they take a walk together. She wanted to clear the air between herself and her sister because she hated knowing that she had been the one to push her away, all because she had been upset and hadn't known how to act around her and the others.

“You're not tired, are you?” Beth asked suddenly and Maggie looked up, a little startled.

“No,” she shook her head. “Why do ya ask?”

“Do you feel like maybe comin' with me to a place? It's not very far from here,” Beth explained. “It's a cabin I came across one day when I was huntin'.”

“You know how to hunt?” Maggie wondered, her eyes widening a little in surprise.

“Yeah,” Beth nodded, feeling her cheeks heat up a little. “I... Uh, didn't I do that before?” she asked nervously.

Maggie looked deep in thought for a moment. Beth could almost see the wheels turning inside of her sister's head. It certainly didn't do anything to calm Beth's own nerves.

“Didn't Morgan teach you?” Maggie asked curiously.

“He knew how to track a bit, but I could do it myself just fine,” Beth admitted. “He always missed somethin' until I pointed it out to him. Then I sort of took over huntin'...” She trailed off at Maggie's wondrous expression. Her sister looked almost like someone had just dropped a stone on her head and she had finally understood something.

“Why don't you show me the cabin? Before it gets too dark?” Maggie suggested, clearly trying to avoid the subject on whether or not Beth had known how to hunt before she was shot. Beth would let it slide for now though, because she wanted to be civil with her sister and she had a few things that she wanted to say anyway, so she wouldn't risk saying anything that would make Maggie pull back.

Once again, they walked quietly through the woods. Beth followed the trail that she had left behind the times that she had gone up to the small cabin to check on it as well as take some time to clear her head. After about an hour or so of walking, they reached the cabin and Maggie looked around, panting a little.

“You'd think I'd be in better condition considerin' how much we used to walk,” her sister chuckled, looking at the wooden house. “You found this you said?”

“Yeah,” Beth nodded. “I come here when I need to clear my head... It's safe. Morgan and I locked it up tightly so that we could have it as a backup in case the farm got attacked or overrun by walkers.”

“Smart,” Maggie acknowledged.

“So you wanna look inside or head back?” Beth asked.

“We should probably head back if we're gonna make it back before dark,” Maggie said. Beth looked in the direction Maggie was looking in and indeed, the sun was already coloring the sky a pinkish orange, indicating that it was setting.

“Okay,” Beth said as the two of them began walking again.

Half an hour passed and Beth glanced over at Maggie. She knew she wanted to deal with it before they reached the farmhouse again and everyone was around them, but she didn't even know where to begin. There were so many things that she wanted to know, so many things that she was afraid of asking. What had happened to the rest of their family?  Had they been happy once?

_Had she ever been in love?_

It was a silly question to ask in the world that they were now living in, but it was something that Beth had thought about a lot when things got hard for her during the seven and something months that she had been alone with Morgan. It had actually been Morgan who had overheard her crying one night and then proceeded the next morning to tell her about all the things he thought she might have done before she had lost her memories. She hadn't been able to speak at that time, but the man had gone on and on about how she was so pretty that she probably had boys lining up around every block to ask her out and how she had most likely been the fiercest warrior in some amazonian tribe or something close to that.

Naturally, Beth hadn't looked anything like any amazonian woman she had seen in the comic books they had found along the way, but since she hadn't been able to speak, she had kept that all to herself. Then, when she got her voice back and got a moment alone from time to time, she thought about all the things that Morgan had gone on about and tried to imagine what her boyfriend might have looked like.

One night, when she had been sitting alone in her room in the farmhouse, probably a month or so before Rick's group had found them, there had been a small moment when Beth remembered sitting at a table with candles on the table. She couldn't remember what she had been wearing, where she was nor who it was that was sitting by the table with her.  The only thing she had been able to remember, were the candles and a fluttering feeling in her stomach.  She had been able to recall her mouth moving, smiling, feeling happy for the first time in forever, but couldn't recall a single word she had spoken or what the other person had told her. But in that moment, things had been  _good_ and she had to believe that it couldn't have been with just anyone that she had felt that way.

Then again, she didn't want to know whether she had lost that person too, although perhaps it was better to at least know that she had had someone who had been that close to her, at least at some point in her life.

“Maggie...” Beth began slowly, earning her sister's attention.

“Hm?” Maggie hummed, looking over at Beth.

“I, uh... I wanted to apologize for the way I acted at dinner that night,” Beth said. “I was outta line and I really shouldn't have snapped the way I did.”

“Beth,” Maggie sighed. “I was the one who was out of line. I should have thought before I spoke and for that _I'm_ sorry.”

“Can we please just start over?” Beth asked. “I remember how I felt when Michonne told me you were my sister. I was so happy and so _scared_ at disappointing you, I think... Please understand that I might be different from what you remember.”

“I think you might have changed even before you got separated from us,” Maggie mumbled distantly, but then a smile bloomed on her face. “Although, I would very much like to start over. To get to know you again... Be _real_ sisters again.”

“Good,” Beth bit her lip. “Would it... Would if be okay if I hugged you? I feel like I should hug you.”

This time Maggie didn't even bother to try and hide her tears. She nodded as one slid down her cheek. “Yes, that would be okay,” she said, opening her arms in the same moment that Beth stepped into them.

Beth clung to her sister, her nose buried in Maggie's neck as she inhaled deeply. There was something so familiar about hugging Maggie, that it startled her a little at first.  The scent that Beth inhaled, underneath the small hint of sweat from working hard and trekking through the woods with Beth for over two hours so far... It was something that Beth recognized. Before Beth could stop it, tears began slipping from her own eyes, but Maggie didn't say anything. Instead, she just held Beth tighter, as if letting her go would cause her to slip away into non-existence again. Beth buried her face in the crook of Maggie's neck and allowed herself to just  _cry_ silently . She felt safer than she ever had before  and she knew it in her heart that Maggie would never use her tears against her, or mention them to anyone. This moment was between them and for the first time since her family had found her, Beth knew it in her heart that eventually things were going to be alright between them.

* * *

T hey arrived at the farmhouse just an hour or so after nightfall. Morgan, Maggie, Sasha, Michonne, Carol and Noah were sitting outside on the porch, talking in hushed tones and Abraham called them over to help carry out the things they had brought back with them.

Daryl could once again feel Glenn's eyes at him but he ignored it, knowing that he had already snapped at the man enough earlier. It wasn't necessarily Glenn's fault though, because Daryl understood that the people in his group and family would be talking about him behind his back the  _second_ he had seen Beth alive. He knew that the chance of them just letting him be and not bringing up the way he had been after he had lost Beth was slim to none, but he had never expected any of them to just be so goddamn blunt about it either. Had they not learned anything about him from the years that they had been together? How could they not know that he would rather that no one bothered him about Beth, and instead just let him take his own time with approaching her, or even  _choosing_ whether he would  _ever_ approach her? It wasn't their choice to make and it certainly wasn't any of their business.

While he was busy trying to ignore Glenn, something else entirely caught his attention: Maggie was  _smiling_ . Actually, she was beaming as she approached her husband and kissed his cheek, causing Daryl to shy away from them for a moment. They were still close enough so that he could head them talking though.

“I _talked_ to her, Glenn,” Maggie said happily. “I actually talked to Beth today and we took a walk together and we were _good_.”

“I'm happy for you, Mags,” Glenn told his wife. “I told you it would all work out.”

“I'm so happy. It feels like we've finally taken a step in the right direction,” Maggie continued, and that was when Daryl decided to stop listening to them.

H e was happy, for Maggie's sake, he really was... But that didn't change that he was also a little pissed at the woman for past mistakes, the first of which being that she hadn't spared a minute to actually go and search for her younger sister after Daryl had told her that Beth was alive somewhere. Then again, maybe he shouldn't dwell on things from the past? However, how much had Maggie actually told Beth? Had she told her  _anything at all_ ?

“Are ya movin' the shit or just standin' there?” Abraham asked beside him suddenly. Daryl shot the man a glare before grabbing some of the bags from the bed of the pickup truck, carrying them toward the house.

“Everything go okay?” Carol asked him and he replied with a curt nod and a grunt. The woman rolled her eyes at him, but said nothing else. Michonne sent him an amused look before walking over to Rick, telling him that she had made Carl watch his baby sister and put her to bed as well since she thought it was good for them all to have time with Judith. Rick smiled at Michonne and thanked her for once again looking out for his children and the woman proceeded to squeeze his arm and smile lightly at him.

Daryl snorted, shaking his head. Michonne and everyone else sure made sure to hound him regarding Beth, but no one looked at their own behavior or more importantly, no one ever talked about how close Rick and Michonne had gotten since the fall of the prison. But Daryl wasn't like the others, so he would never be the one to point it out to them. Instead, he would do what he did best: observe in silence and tease when the right time came.

Before he knew it, they had gotten all the things inside and Daryl took the task of parking Morgan's pickup truck in its designated spot. As he walked back toward the house, he could see Glenn approaching him slowly.

“Hey, Daryl, could I just talk to you for a second?” the younger man asked. Daryl narrowed his eyes at him but nodded. Glenn sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his hair. “Listen, I didn't mean anything bad with what I said today. It's your business and I respect whatever your choice is.”

Daryl didn't say anything, just observed him quietly and Glenn blinked a few times before continuing.

“I'm not saying anything and I'm not telling you what to do, but you just gotta remember that we're your friends and I... I guess I just remembered the way you were when we lost Beth and I thought it would be good to tell you that it's okay for you to speak to her, if you want to,” Glenn explained. “Not that anyone is forbidding you to do so,” he added quickly with wide eyes. “I mean, I don't think anyone would ever do that and this is all me by the way. Maggie didn't put me up to talking to you. I did it by my own choice and really hope I haven't, like, offended you or anything.”

In that moment, Daryl saw the old Glenn that he remembered meeting for the first time in the camp outside of Atlanta. The younger man was shifting nervously in front of him, almost as if he was expecting Daryl to punch him or something for saying the things he had said. When Daryl had snapped at him earlier today, it had been because he had been frustrated about the fact that no one minded their own business when it came to him and Beth. He didn't mean anything bad personally toward Glenn, but naturally, it had come out that way. He knew that everyone just wanted what was best for him, but the fact was that he wanted what was best for _Beth_ and currently, that was that he stayed the hell away from her until he got his feelings under control.

“Beth don't know me no more, Glenn,” he said quietly. “I'm a stranger to her now.” Maybe speaking truthfully would get Glenn off his back at least? Not that he hadn't told Michonne and Carol the truth, but he knew that women were more persistent and both Michonne and Carol were a thousand times more stubborn than the average woman.

“I get that,” Glenn nodded solemnly. “But we're all strangers to her, aren't we? I mean, she's getting to know everyone all over again. Everyone but _you_.”

“It's better that way,” Daryl said. Glenn didn't look very convinced, but he also didn't look like he would start the same conversation over with Daryl again. “I'm off ta bed. Tired as fuck an' we need ta keep workin' the fence tomorrow an' then help the Scientist with the pipes.”

“Right,” Glenn agreed. “Well, good night then, I guess.”

“G'night,” Daryl nodded back before heading inside, leaving Glenn behind. Inside the rest of the adults were sitting in the living room, going over the plans for tomorrow as well as re-telling stories on how their day had gone. Daryl bid them a good night as well before heading upstairs, his crossbow hanging heavily around his shoulders. He could feel the tiredness seeping into his bones and he couldn't wait to finally go to bed and get some shut-eye. For once since they had arrived at the farm, he thought he might get a good night's sleep without constantly seeing Beth in front of him, just based on how tired he was.

As he walked through the hallway and toward his room, suddenly loud laughs were heard before the door opposite to his opened and both Rosita and Tara stumbled out, laughing their heads off at something. Behind them, Beth stood in a pair of flannel pajama pants and a gr a y short-sleeved shirt with an arrow on it, laughing along in the doorway.

Daryl stood frozen, staring at the three of them, but mostly, his attention was on the blonde tresses that framed Beth's face.

The three young women finally seemed to notice him staring and slowly their laughter died out. Tara and Rosita looked at each other, then at Daryl before slowly turning back to look at Beth and then back again at Daryl. He almost sighed, but he felt that if he did, all the air he held in his lungs would disappear and he might have a heart attack or something, which would honestly be a stupid way to die considering how many times he had cheated death already.

When Beth's cheeks turned rosy and she bit her lower lip, he sure as hell felt like it would give out though, so without acknowledging Tara and Rosita who tried to ask him how the run had gone, he promptly walked past them and went straight into his room, closing the door quickly. He lowered his crossbow and swallowed thickly, not being able to get the image of Beth's flushing cheeks out of his head before walking over to his bed. He gently put his crossbow on the chair next to the bed and then took off his angel-winged vest. He changed into a softer cotton shirt that Carol had given him when she had been done washing the clothes that Beth had given them and then laid down on his bed, one arm behind his head while the other rested on his stomach.

His mind was yet again invaded with the image of Beth's wide, blue eyes and he recalled how she just a minute ago had stood by her door, so casually and looked at him so  _nervously_ , while tugging on her lip.

Yeah, he probably wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight either.

* * *

Beth stepped back into the room and closed the door, leaning her back against it. She reached up and pressed her cool fingertips to her cheeks, knowing that they had been set aflame as soon as she had laid eyes on Daryl's slightly startled expression at seeing her, Rosita and Tara by her door.

She hadn't really been thinking when she invited Tara and Rosita into her room to just hang out for a bit. In her mind, it was what normal teenagers would do with her friends and after having that walk and talk with Maggie, she had really needed something to ease her mind a bit. At first it had been a little awkward because she still didn't know Rosita very well, but the girl had turned out to be a sweet badass that didn't take any shit from anyone. Rosita shared a bit about herself and her story with Abraham as well as a couple of stories from before the world went to crap. For a while they just sat there, reminiscing and sharing and when Beth began feeling a little bad about not remembering anything other than the last seven months, Rosita covered her hand and told her that she'd remember eventually.

Having that kind of support from someone who she had supposedly never even met before was startling to Beth, but she appreciated it just the same. When Rosita and Tara had finally called it a night and gotten up to leave, they had been telling each other bad jokes, which was exactly why they had been laughing so hard when they had opened the door.

And then Daryl was there.

And Beth had felt something.

It had been so subtle that she had almost missed it completely first because of the initial shock at seeing someone just standing there in the hallway, staring at them all. Then, his eyes had moved over her form and her heart, if only for a moment, had stuttered a bit in her chest. The blush had crept up on her cheeks before she had been able to even try telling herself not to turn red all over and then she had seen a small hint of pink on Daryl's cheeks as well, the moment before he had torn his eyes away from her and walked into his room.

Beth took a small breath and shook her head at herself. It had taken her physical contact or at least a conversation with everyone before she had felt the familiarity, but with Daryl, it apparently only took him looking her in the eyes for the first time since that awkward moment in the hallway downstairs, the day after they had arrived on the farm.

What exactly did that mean?

She couldn't help but wonder if they had been close before, but then again, if they had been, wouldn't Daryl at least have tried to have a simple conversation with her? They had been on the farm for over a week and the only thing the man seemed to be doing was trying to avoid her at every cost. Sometimes, when she walked around outside with Tara while the others worked on the wall, she could feel eyes burning into her back. She knew that _someone_ was watching her, but she hadn't known that it was Daryl until she had caught him looking away once, almost a little slowly, as if he didn't really care whether she caught him. From that moment, she too sneaked a look his way, wondering why he acted the way he acted; why he never tried to talk to her.

Two nights ago she had been sitting in her room, writing in her journal about how she had finally taken the step to talk to Carol and Tyreese after getting a lot of encouragement from Tara, when she had heard voices down on the porch.

She had tried to peer down her window and see who it was, but she couldn't. Instead, she had recognized Carol's voice.

“ _Don't think that she won't come to you just because you act like she's a damn walker or something that you don't want to get close to._ ”

Beth's mind had been swirling, wondering who Carol was talking to and then Carol had continued.

“ _And I might not be your keeper, Daryl, but I am your friend, and as your friend, I'll always be there to remind you that you're making a mistake when I see that your are._ ”

_Daryl._

Carol had been talking to _Daryl_ about _Beth_.

Or at least Beth assumed that it was her that Carol had been talking about since she couldn't remember if Daryl had been avoiding anyone else. But why would Carol tell Daryl that he was making a mistake by doing so?

Everything was just so confusing and Beth really didn't feel like making any assumptions. She wanted to hear it, whatever _it_ was, from Daryl himself, but how was she supposed to approach him if he really was avoiding her?

That along with the jolt she had felt in her stomach tonight when she had seen him made her wonder, and if anything Beth nowadays hated, it was wondering. She wanted answers, just like she had desperately craved them seven months prior when she hadn't even been able to remember her own name. She wanted to get to know _everyone_ who had been a part of her group, her family, and at this moment, Beth realized, Daryl was the only one she hadn't had at least one conversation with. Even Abraham and Eugene used to at least say good morning to her when she passed them by, but Daryl never as much as looked up at her.

Why was that?

She wanted to know and she wanted to talk to Daryl. So as she walked over to her bed and laid down, Beth thought about a good way to approach Daryl without making him uncomfortable.

Beth just hoped that it wouldn't take too long until she got the opportunity to put her plan in motion.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, Beth is talented with knives in this story and I sincerely hope that you guys are okay with that. I mean, I think that almost anything is possible when adrenaline kicks in and we already know for a fact that Beth has good aim (she kind of reminds me of comic!Andrea in that aspect). We've previously seen it on the show that people can get very good with certain skills "suddenly" even after having no professional training (*cough cough* Andrea being a great shot on the show) so I decided to go that route with Beth throwing knives. Her skills play an important part in the following chapter, which you all know is when our dear Daryl finally gets some alone time with Beth!
> 
> I bet some of you can already imagine how that's gonna go, considering Beth's reflections in the final part of this chapter! ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading! Feel free to comment and tell me what you thought! It's very much appreciated and it gives me that push that I need to get chapters finished quicker! Also, I might not be able to update just as quickly as I did this time because I have an exam coming up next week and I have a lot of books to read... still though, comment away and I'll do my best to get the next chapter done within a week! :)
> 
> Thank you for your support!
> 
> xoxo


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four days have passed and Beth has so far been unsuccessful at approaching Daryl when she finally decides to take action almost drastically. Meanwhile, Daryl has been doing his best to stay away from the blonde and he finally decides to just go on a hunt, to maybe relax a little...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick little note here! This chapter is a long one and I really, hope you guys enjoy it! I've been studying my a** off for a law exam I have this Saturday, so unfortunately, I won't be able to write anything until Sunday...
> 
> On the end note of this chapter I have some questions that I would be very happy if you could answer in a comment! Thank you so much to everyone who has sent their love and support by commenting, subscribing and giving their kudos! You mean everything to me!
> 
> Now please enjoy! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 7

It proved far more difficult for Beth to get Daryl alone for a conversation that she would have ever thought. The man seemed to be a professional when it came to avoiding her and somehow, each and every time she had hoped to catch him alone, he managed to find someone to talk to about something 'important' that needed privacy.

Not that he said anything to Beth about it being important, because he didn't talk to her. No, she just assumed it was important because of the constant crease between his eyebrows and the way his lips were always pressed into a tight line and how he always grunted out 'Need to talk to ya' to whoever it was that passed him by.

Four days had passed since Beth had made up her mind about seeking out Daryl and not once had she been able to catch him alone. She was pretty sure that he had noticed her secret advances, because from what others had told her, he seemed to be pretty observant, especially considering the fact that he was a hunter. That had to be the only explanation to how he always managed to find something to do, whether it was working on the pipelines with Eugene or building the walls or digging the pits.

Beth narrowed her eyes as she looked over Rosita's shoulder at the hunter who was carrying one of the larger pipes together with Rick. They had been working on getting the old pipes replaced with the new ones they had brought back from their last run and to get the water running from the farm's own water supply. Four days had gone by and it seemed like they should be done soon, but Eugene clearly wanted to make sure that everything was well connected and working fine before he even tried to turn on the water pump.

“Beth? Are you even listening to me?” Rosita exasperatedly asked. Beth looked at her quickly, forcing her attention away from Daryl. The woman was looking at her and frowning, curiosity written all over her face. “What's gotten your attention so bad? I've been trying to talk to you for five minutes but you keep drifting off.”

Beth shrugged, trying to act indifferent, “Just didn't sleep well. Sorry, what were you saying?”

“I was _saying_ ,” Rosita drawled, “that we should go and check the pits to see if there are any walkers caught there.”

Beth glanced sideways at Daryl who wiped a bit of sweat of his forehead, “Yeah, yeah... Sounds good.” She watched as Daryl bent down to pick up his crossbow  from the porch. He had put it there when Rick had asked him for help to carry the pipes and Beth had noticed how the man seemed to never let it out of his sight.  Absentmindedly, Beth bit her lip and tilted her head a little as her eyes zeroed in on the way his arms flexed as he picked it up. He wasn't wearing any sleeves but she wasn't surprised that he wasn't cold. It was a warm day and even Beth found herself sweating a bit in the heat.

Wasn't it supposed to be autumn anyway?

Internally Beth shook her head at herself. She had stopped wondering about the weather a long time ago since it wasn't that reliable.

“Beth!” Rosita called out her name loudly. Beth jumped startled and stared widely as Daryl turned around less than a second after Rosita had called her name. His crossbow was raised and there was a worried expression etched on his face. Their eyes met briefly and Beth looked away, feeling the blush creep up her cheeks. Her heart beat wildly in her chest and she could still _feel_ that his eyes were on her. She needed to know for sure though, so it wasn't just her imagination. Pulling together all her strength, she turned her head sideways before glancing up. Daryl's eyes were indeed still trained on her and this time, she didn't back down, even if she knew she was probably beet-red in the face. From a distance she could see that he too had a small blush as he slowly lowered his crossbow, clearly seeing that there was no danger present.

Beth wondered if he would have reacted the same way if someone else might have been in danger, or if this was something that was strictly connected to her. She didn't want to be egoistic or self-centered, but her mind actually did go there and she was genuinely curious. Could anyone really blame her for wondering?

Daryl was the one who looked away first and Beth watched him for a while longer as he started busying himself with cleaning his crossbow with a red rag that he always seemed to hav e close to himself.

Beth forced herself to look away from him and finally met Rosita's eyes again. The woman was looking a little smug for some reason and Beth could almost bet everything that it was because she had practically caught Beth checking out Daryl.

If it was possible to blush more, Beth was sure that she would, but since she was a hundred percent sure that there wasn't a part of her face that wasn't flushed, she wasn't worried about making herself even more obvious.

“So, do you wanna check out the pits with me then?” Rosita asked, that smug smile only widening on her lips.

“Yeah, okay,” Beth nodded eagerly. She wanted to get as far away from Daryl at the moment because she had embarrassed herself enough already.

Rosita's smug grin softened into a smaller smile and Beth could see something in her eyes that expressed honesty. “You know, it's okay,” she told Beth.

“Hmm?” Beth hummed. “What is?”

“That you're wonderin' about him... Daryl,” Rosita clarified.

Beth tried to act indifferent, “I'm not wonderin' anythin'.”

She could tell that Rosita wasn't convinced though, but the brunette shrugged at her anyway. “I'm just sayin' that if you were, it would be fine,” Rosita said before hooking her arm through Beth's. Her shotgun was slung over her back as she pulled Beth along with her. “Come on, let's go check on those pits.”

Beth followed her, but not before looking back and sneaking one last glance at Daryl.

Her heart beat just a tad faster, when she caught him looking away from her quickly and she decided that she'll be damned if she let another day pass without her talking to him.

* * *

Daryl forced himself to look away from Beth when he saw her turning toward him again after Rosita pulled her along. He felt her eyes linger a bit on him before she walked off somewhere, probably toward the pits considering the direction they were walking in and he took a deep breath.

These last four days it had become more and more difficult to avoid the blonde. It seemed almost like she had stated seeking him out and he could understand on some level that she might be curious about him. That didn't change his feelings at all though. He still firmly believed that Beth was better off not knowing him or getting close to him. After all, the last time they had become close, he had gotten so distracted that he had opened the front door without thinking and thus let a bunch of walkers separate them, which allowed for her to be kidnapped and then shot.

_No_ , he told himself. Beth was better off with him as a simple acquaintance. Maybe he could keep her safe that way; as some kind of protector from a distance.

Or was that just creepy?

He snorted at himself, imagining all the things Merle would probably say to him about him being a  nasty  pervert toward Beth from afar which would probably have led to him punching his older brother's lights out.

Daryl knew that he couldn't keep making up excuses anymore though. Beth had become more forward when it came to looking at him and she didn't just shy away when he met her gaze or caught her looking. Instead she held her head high and her eyes seemed to shine somewhat awfully, which made his stomach turn in a way that he had only felt once before, and even that had been in her presence.  The girl seemed to be determined to catch him alone, but so far he had been able to always find someone to talk to when she came close.

He needed a break.

He needed to hunt.

Daryl had made the decision the previous night when he had gone to bed and yet again hadn't been able to fall asleep. It almost infuriated him that Beth was always on his mind even when he knew that she was fine. The seven months that he had thought she was dead had been some of the most difficult months of his life and he had been certain that he would never stop dreaming about her. Then she showed up alive and well and he figured that maybe with time, his dreams of the girl would ease up. So far he had been proven wrong by his brain each and every night. It didn't matter how hard he tried not to think about her, because as soon as he remembered that she was sleeping in the room opposite his, he couldn't help but think about her.

The thing about Beth was that when she entered Daryl's mind once, she never left it.

He had barely gotten a few hours of sleep last night and that was when he had decided that he needed to exhaust himself in order to sleep better, if only for a night.

Today he had helped a bit with carrying the pipes down to the basement were Eugene was working, but he knew that he needed to get going if he was to return to the farm tonight. The woods near the farm were still unexplored to him and he wanted to take his time to try and get to know them better. He needed to know what kind of game there was there too so that he could plan his hunting trips better as well.

“Rick!” he called, gaining the other man's attention. “Get ya ass over 'ere,” he waved him over, strapping his crossbow to his back.

Rick wiped his forehead before jogging over to him, “What? Somethin' wrong?”

“Nah,” Daryl drawled. “Just wanted ta tell ya that I'm goin' out huntin'. Unless ya need me here?”

“We got it under control here, Daryl,” Rick told him, putting his hand on his shoulder. “Ya need a break anyway. You've been workin' hard these last few days.”

“Tha wall needs to go up,” Daryl shrugged.

“Y'sure that's the only reason?” Rick inquired, raising a questioning eyebrow at him.

Daryl rolled his eyes, “Don' expect me back until late in the evenin'. Prob'ly be back before it gets too dark, so don't ya go shootin' me or nothin' if I holler at ya.”

Rick looked like he wanted to laugh, probably remembering the time that Andrea had ended up grazing the side of Daryl's head when she had mistaken him for a walker.  It was only for a moment though, because the next, a saddened look covered his face instead and he nodded solemnly at Daryl.

S taying at this farm was bringing back more than just one memory of the Greene farm. Daryl had overheard Maggie and Carol talking about it two days ago in the kitchen and Maggie had pointed out just how similar the farm house was to her childhood home. She had wondered whether a subconscious part of Beth had made her want to stay there just because of the familiarities and at that moment, Morgan had stepped in and told them that Beth indeed had told Morgan once that she thought that she might have lived on a farm.

Daryl had only been able to wonder what else Beth's subconscious might be holding on to for her.

“I'll make sure that don't shoot ya,” Rick told him and Daryl nodded at him.

“See ya later tonight then,” he said, patting Rick's shoulder before making sure that his backup gun was fully loaded and his large hunting knife was sheathed in his belt.

“See ya, Daryl,” Rick called after him.

As Daryl walked toward the fence, Carl hurried over to him, “Where ya goin'?”

“Huntin',” Daryl replied quickly.

“Want some company?” Carl wondered.

“Nah, not today, kid,” Daryl said. “Need some time to myself. Gonna try an' bring back somethin' for ya though.”

“As long as it's not a necklace made of walker ears,” Carl smugly shot at him when he climbed over the fence.

“Maybe I''ll get ya some toes instead then,” Daryl grinned, shaking his head at the boy. “Keep an eye on things, will ya?”

“Ya askin' me to keep an eye on Beth for ya?” Carl retorted, making Daryl pause. “She can watch herself. Ya shoulda seen her, throwing knives like a fucking badass.”

“Don't curse, boy,” Daryl said, trying to change the subject. “Or else yer lil' sister's first word's gonna be somethin' indecent an' then Michonne and yer dad might just kill ya.”

“Whatever,” Carl rolled his eyes. “See ya later, old man!”

“Not that old,” Daryl called after him as the boy hurried back to the house.

Daryl started walking toward the woods, trying not to think about what Carl might have been thinking when he said that Daryl wanted him to keep an eye on Beth.

And the girl knew how to throw knives? Where the hell had that come from?

Actually, when he thought about it, Beth's ability to aim and shoot his crossbow had been fairly impressive when she had first started out learning and she had caught on quickly. The girl had strength that might not be as obvious as it was on some of the women in their group who were better built than her. Daryl had seen it first hand several times when she had killed walkers when they had been alone. Noah had told him the story about how he had gotten out of the damned hospital with Beth's help and according to the kid, Beth had delivered a perfect head shot to every walker that had come their way when she had helped him escape.

Pride had welled in Daryl's chest a moment before grief had gotten the better of him and then he had proceeded to avoid Noah for five days because he always ended up imagining Beth shooting walkers and killing them to help Noah get out.

Daryl forced his mind to travel to other places, not wanting to think about those seven months of hell that he had hardly been able to endure. The bad thoughts were replaced with how Beth looked now.

If what Carl said was true and Beth was skilled at throwing knives, he understood how her arms had gotten more defined than they had been before. Throwing knives was probably only one of the skills the girl had and if what Morgan had told them was true, the girl could hold her own out there in the world. After all, she had saved the man's life on more than one occasion.

Daryl stopped walking abruptly, looking to the right where he knew the pits were. He could see Rosita and Beth standing there talking about something and from where he was standing, it seemed to be a serious conversation.

What was he doing?

He shouldn't be watching Beth.

He shouldn't even be _thinking_ about Beth!

The whole point of going on this hunt was to clear his mind from the girl and to finally maybe give himself a moment to breathe where he didn't wonder what she was doing every second that he couldn't see her.

Forcing his feet to move, he still couldn't help but glance toward the blonde one last time before stepping into the woods.

* * *

Beth and Rosita looked down in the pits with frowns on their faces. Rosita had her arms crossed over her chest while both of Beth's hands rested on her hips, looking down at the emptiness.

The pits had been dug out within the first few days that Rick and the others had arrived but every time that they checked on them, they always found them empty.

“Isn't in a bit strange how we haven't seen any walkers _at all_ around here?” Rosita remarked.

Beth shrugged, “Yeah, a bit, I suppose. Isn't that a good thing though?”

“Maybe,” Rosita mumbled, still looking a bit worried.

“What are you thinking?” Beth asked, looking at the other woman.

“Nothin',” Rosita replied. “It's probably nothin'.”

Beth opened her mouth to ask her to clarify when something behind her caught her attention. A hundred meters away or so, she spotted Daryl walking toward the woods. The crossbow slung over his shoulder was what gave his identity away and she watched him quietly as he walked to the edge of the woods before stopping for a moment. He was staring straight ahead before moving, almost automatically, pulling his crossbow forward and lifting it up. It was almost as if he wasn't even aware of the fact that he had done it and he stayed frozen for another minute before turning his head in Beth's direction.

Beth's breath hitched and she looked at Rosita again before glancing back at Daryl, who was once again looking ahead of himself.

“Where's he goin'?” Beth mumbled, mostly to herself but it seemed like she had caught Rosita's attention. The woman turned and looked in Daryl's direction right before the man stepped into the woods and out of their view.

“Probably to hunt or something,” Rosita shrugged, not seeming surprised at all by this.

Beth however, felt something like panic rise inside of her for some reason. “We should head back,” Beth said quickly. She grabbed Rosita's hand and pulled the woman with her, causing her to yelp in surprise. Beth didn't stop though. She moved quickly back toward the farmhouse, letting go of Rosita's hand only when she knew that they were close enough that Rosita wouldn't be in any danger to be alone. Jumping over the fence, she hurried past Carl who was once again looking at her impressed before she stomped up to Morgan and Rick who were discussing something.

“Where is Daryl going?”

Her question came out more demanding that she had initially wanted it to be, but it earned her both Morgan and Rick's attention.

“He's huntin', lil' Lady,” Morgan said, a little surprised. “What's gotten you so stressed?”

“Is it really a good idea to have him go out alone like that? Shouldn't someone have gone with him?” Beth asked, frowning deeply.

“Daryl does his best huntin' alone,” Rick told her. “He'll be fine out there.”

For a second Beth's mind went to how she too did her best hunting alone, but she didn't bring it up. Instead she thought about Daryl alone in the woods and she didn't like it at all. Even if there hardly were any walkers in this area, she had a gut feeling that something could go wrong and it didn't  _feel_ right to have him out there without anyone to watch his back.

She might be a bit of a hypocrite for thinking it, since she had gone out alone multiple times and Daryl was quite a bit older than her so she didn't doubt that he  _could_ take care of himself. It was just that she wanted to  _make sure_ that he was fine.

Beth looked over at Morgan and the older man met her gaze.

“Lady...” he started, but trailed off when she just looked at him. She knew what she was asking him and he understood it too. They had long ago learned to communicate without words, after all. Finally, after searching her determined eyes for a minute, Morgan gave her a curt nod. “Be careful,” was all he said.

Beth stepped forward and embraced him tightly before running inside the house. She didn't miss Rick's confused look, but she would leave it to Morgan to explain where she was going. She passed Maggie and Tara in the hallway, but she didn't have time to say anything. Instead she hurried to her room and dug out her box of throwing knives, attaching them to her belt. She grabbed another smaller dagger that she always carried with her and pulled on a long sleeved shirt over her head in case it got chilly. She strapped the dagger to her thigh, using the  leg strap that she had acquired while she had been alone with Morgan.

She bolted out of her room, slamming the door behind her, hurried down the stairs as quickly as she could. She threw a “See ya later!” at Maggie and Tara when she passed them again and ran straight passed Rick and Morgan. Rick was still looking a bit surprised, but in Morgan's eyes there had been no such thing, rather, they shone with pride.

Beth once again jumped over the fence, ignoring Maggie calling out after her. Morgan would explain it to her sister. She ran to the edge of the forest, stopping only to look for the trail. It was barely noticeable, showing just how skilled of a hunter Daryl was. Beth followed it, a little bit in awe at how good the man was at covering his tracks, while at the same time making them so obvious to a skilled hunter.

She didn't know where she had learned to hunt, but seeing some of the tracks that Daryl left behind, she couldn't help but think that they were very similar to the hints she left herself when she went out alone.

* * *

The bolt flew straight into the squirrel, nailing it to the tree. Daryl lowered his crossbow and closed the gap between him and his little prey, taking it down from where it was hanging, attaching the animal to his belt. There were a good couple of squirrels hanging there, but he was tracking a deer that he had spotted about an hour ago before it had run off on him. He had managed to get the damn thing on it's back, and he could see that it was slowing down the closer he got to it. There were blood traces on the ground and he knew that it had lost a lot of blood already and was probably dying. He wanted to find it soon so that he could put it out of it's misery faster.

He had been out for hours, exploring the woods. It was relaxing to be alone and he honestly hadn't thought about Beth more than a couple times, which surely could be considered progress.

_ Damn it _ .

He did it again.

Thinking about the girl he wasn't supposed to think about while thinking about how he had managed not to think about her.

_ 'Fuck, lil' brother. If I'd known ya were such a teenager at heart, I wouldn't'a left ya like I did! Ya need a fuckin' babysitter now too?' _

“Stop it...” Daryl mumbled to Merle who had invaded his mind again. His brother was right though; he felt stupid for not being able to get Beth out of his mind.

_ 'Ya whipped, bro? Why don't ya just get what ya want an' get it over with? Officer Friendly an' the others'll surely kick ya out fer touchin' that sweet little piece of ass-' _

“Stop!” Daryl exclaimed loudly.

His voice rang out clear as day and for a brief moment, he didn't even realize what he had done. It was such a _stupid_ mistake. Something he was sure he had _never_ done when he had been out on a hunt alone after the turn. His head wasn't screwed on right; that had to be the only explanation. Maybe it hadn't been for months, since the moment he had thought Beth had been killed in front of him.

He held his breath, listening intently.

Merle's voice was silent once again in his head, as were the woods around him.

He thought he might be safe...until he heard a moan and some shuffling.

The walker stumbled into his view, out of the trees. Daryl lifted his crossbow, aimed at his head and released the bolt, hoping that it was the only one that had heard him.

“Damn it,” he muttered to himself, reloading the crossbow when more groans and moans were heard a little further away. He couldn't risk letting the walkers get to the farmhouse; he couldn't risk putting them all in danger.

Standing his ground, he waited. Four walkers dragged their feet against him and he shot one of them instantly. He backed up a little to give himself time to reload his crossbow, shooting another one.

Then. Another ten walkers stepped into view and he realized that he would be gravely outnumbered if he allowed them to get too close. He took a couple of steps back before turning around to run, but jumped back just as another two walkers came up behind him, growling and snapping their jaws with their hands stretched out in front of them. He kicked one back, reaching for his knife and stabbed the other one through the temple, blackened blood oozing out of it and onto his hand. The walker he had kicked stumbled back at him and he put that one down too, but by then, the other walkers behind him had gotten too close.

One of them grabbed at his shoulder and he struggled out of it's grip, turning with his knife in the air. The knife slashed across the decayed face and blood poured out, but it was only superficial, so the monster didn't die. Two more pushed at the first biter and Daryl stumbled back, trying to push them away so that he could get enough room to move.

He fell and landed on his back, the walkers falling over him. He managed to kill one as he was falling with it, but he couldn't get the other two. Others were circling around, dropping to the ground on their knees, growling and snarling as they leaned closer to him.

He was done for.

He was going to get bitten, or scratched, or just plain eaten up completely.

And the only thing going through his mind was Beth.

_ 'Well aren't ya a pathetic son of a bitch?' _

Daryl would have rolled his eyes at Merle's reappearance in his thoughts, but he figured if he was dying anyway and there was a life after this one, he could just kick his brother's ass for haunting his mind.

The walker next to him suddenly fell dead. Daryl looked at it quickly, seeing a shiny blade sticking out of it's skull. Next, a _swish_ was heard close to him, and the walker that was on top of him went limp; another blade having been embedded straight into it's forehead.

Daryl managed to get his knife up to kill the third and pushed the dead bodies off of himself with his legs, scrambling out of the way of the other walkers that had knelt down. Two more knives were sent flying, but one of them only hit a walker in the shoulder. Daryl pushed his hunting knife deep into it's head, killing it instantly.

He watched as someone ran out of the trees, too quick to be a walker. He caught the sight of a blonde head, hair whipping around as the person- the _girl_ \- kicked a walker hard enough to cause it to stumble back. She put a dagger through it's head, blood spraying all over her shirt, but she didn't as much as flinch.

Her lips were pressed together tightly, her blue eyes glowing with a fierce intensity that left Daryl breathless.

It took him a second to bring himself back to reality and he stood immediately, helping her take down one walker after the other quietly.

When it was over, they were both panting. She still had her back turned toward him, but she slowly turned around and faced him. There was blood splattered all over her face and her long sleeved shirt was drenched in walker blood up to the elbows. Her whole front was wet as well and he could see just a hint of sweat on her forehead.

Then she _smiled–_ just _fucking_ smiled at him, and his heartbeat picked up faster than ever.

“Hi,” Beth grinned at him. “How's your hunt goin'?”

* * *

“What do ya mean she went after Daryl?” Maggie asked Morgan who had just finished explaining where Beth had run off to at such a speed. His explanation was actually only one sentence ( _“She went after Daryl.”_ ) and the man had spoken it so calmly that Maggie had actually stared at him as if he had gone crazy before taking a small step toward him with narrowed eyes.

“She didn't like the idea of him hunting alone in the woods without backup,” Morgan explained further. “So she went after him.”

“Without actually discussing it with anyone?” Maggie frowned.

“Mags,” Glenn said beside her, but the woman just shook her head at her husband.

“She discussed it with me,” Morgan said, his eyes narrowing a bit. “Beth can make her own decisions and I support them.”

“How can you just-” Maggie cut herself off and shook her head. “I just can't believe that you let her run off like that. We just got her back! What if something happens to her?”

“Listen,” Morgan sighed, rubbing his temple with two of his fingers. “I get that you're worried about the lil' Lady, but I promise you that she can hold her own. You might not be used to seeing her as someone who is a survivor, but believe me, you weren't there after she dug herself out of her grave and I got her to safety.”

Maggie remained silent, but Morgan could tell that she was still worried about her sister. The brunette looked down at the ground and then kicked a small stone angrily before looking up at Morgan. “I know you've taught her well since you found her,” Maggie said, “but she's still my little sister.”

“And I can promise you that when she returns with Daryl, you'll see just how strong and capable she is of taking care of herself,” Morgan retorted calmly.

“I never said I didn't believe that she was strong,” Maggie frowned.

“You didn't have to,” Morgan said. “It's all in your eyes.”

Maggie stared at him as if he had just slapped her, but he honestly couldn't care less about that. He knew that Maggie cared about Beth and that she had missed her sister and all that, but he didn't like the fact that she still didn't seem to be able to grasp that Beth actually _could_ take care of herself. 

Beth had told Morgan that she had showed Maggie the cabin in the woods that the two of them had found and the sisters seemed to have talked their issues over. Still, Morgan could see that Maggie wanted to keep Beth safe at all times, clearly scared of losing her again.

The older sister needed a wake up call and she would most likely get one when Beth returned home in one piece.

* * *

Beth had been walking through the woods for what felt like hours until she had finally found Daryl. She had heard the snarls and groans and moved as fast as she could, scared that her heart might actually jump right out of her chest when she had finally seen Daryl on the ground, walkers on top of him and surrounding him.

If anyone would have asked her to retell the story of how she had managed to actually get the upper hand on the walkers before Daryl got himself up and began helping her kill the bastards, she would have to say that it had all been a blur.

It had been a while since she had been forced to fight off walkers like that, but her muscle memory worked perfectly fine and just as Michonne had agreed with her on, instincts didn't just go away. The moment she had seen Daryl on his back, something inside of her had just snapped and she had worked as fast as she could to just try and save his life. She didn't know whether he had been bitten or not, but she _really_ wished he hadn't been.

When she had asked him how his hunt was going after they had killed all the walkers, she had actually been joking, but Daryl was just staring at her, his mouth slightly agape.

“Uhm... Ya weren't bit, were ya?” Beth asked nervously.

Her new, more serious question seemed to bring Daryl out of his shock, daze, _whatever_.

He closed his mouth and shook his head slowly.

“I followed your tracks,” she explained quickly. Maybe he was just confused as to why she was here and how she had found him? “Lost ya a couple of times... Guess I'm a bit rusty. But it's a good thing I got here, ain't it?”

Once again, Daryl didn't speak. He did however reach back into his pocket and pulled out his red rag and threw it at her. She caught it in the air and watched him curiously as he lowered his eyes to the ground. She held the surprisingly soft material in her hands before wiping her face with it, knowing that she probably looked awful.

“We gonna head back or are you gonna keep trackin' that deer and hope the walkers didn't get to it first?” she asked him. The only thing he offered her was a small shrug and half a head nod in the direction that the deer tracks led.

Was he really going to be _that_ stubborn?

“Let's go get your deer then,” Beth finally said. “Just need to get my knives real fast and I think you want your arrows back, don't you?”

This time Daryl looked over at her, mumbled something inaudible- which she was pretty sure was meant for his ears only- before walking over to the walkers they had killed. He tore out the bolts from the ones he had killed, wiping the blood off of his pants that were already stained.

Both of them would be in need of washing when they got back to the farmhouse and Beth really hoped that Eugene had gotten the water running. She glanced over at Daryl as she retrieved her throwing knives, being able to finally see the tension set in his shoulders. The man was clearly surprised by her sudden appearance and still didn't want to talk to her. She knew she would once again have to be patient and wait for him to actually approach her instead of forcing him to speak to her, like she really wanted to do deep down.

The two of them got their things together and Daryl began walking. She watched him for a moment until he stopped, his back still turned toward her.

“Ya comin'?” His gruff tone and the actual sound of his voice made Beth smile to herself a little, but she was forced to ignore the way she almost shivered.

“Yeah, I'm comin',” she said, hurrying up and falling into step beside him.

Half an hour later they found the deer, a young buck actually, and Daryl took off his squirrel belt, holding it out for her to hold. She pulled it over her shoulder as he lifted the small deer up over his own before sticking out a hand in front of her. It took her a second to realize that he wanted the squirrels back, but she shook her head and tightened her grip on the little rope.

“I can carry them,” she told him. “Let's just head back to the farm before it gets too dark.”

Daryl looked like he wanted to protest, but once again said nothing. 

Instead, they started walking.

* * *

The two of them walked silently through the woods in the direction of the farm. They were still a good hour or so away from their destination and Daryl was already itching to just clean himself up and get as far away from Beth as possible.

He could tell that she wanted to speak to him, but for some reason, the girl kept quiet. Truth be told, deep inside, he too wanted to talk to her, but he really didn't know if he could handle talking to her if she didn't even remember him.

After another ten minutes of walking, he heard Beth sigh loudly. He knew that she was baiting him to ask her whether she was tired or not, but he wouldn't give her the satisfaction of giving in like that.

She sighed again and he almost groaned when he realized that he couldn't deny her the conversation she was seeking any longer.

“Where tha hell did ya learn how to fight like tha', girl?” he asked, his tone coming out a little harsher than he had intended.

He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes and noticed how a small smile spread across her face. She had lured him right into her little trap, but Daryl found himself not caring.

“You tell me,” she said, her voice light, just like he remembered it. The rasp that had been there the night that they had found her and Morgan was gone, but Daryl couldn't help but wonder if her throat was still strained from time to time.

“Don' see how I can do that,” he told her, ignoring the small flutters in his gut that were making him feel less like a man and more like a teenage boy again.

They walked for a bit in silence before Beth spoke again, “Morgan and I got ambushed by walkers one day when we were still just walking from town to town. I was still a bit weak and recovering, but when I saw that he was about to lose the fight I just started slashing through the dead ones as if I had been doing it for a million years.”

“Muscle memory,” Daryl said, even though he didn't really think that was the only answer. When they had been alone, he had managed to teach her a couple of things when it came to fighting, and she had picked up on it fairly quick. Perhaps her brain had at least had the decency to allow her to remember those parts of their time together.

“I don't think it's just that,” Beth said slowly. “Morgan began teaching me what he knew, but he realized that someone else had already laid out the groundwork on me. I picked up things way too quick to be a beginner and the way I moved... Well, I think you get the point.”

“What's your question then?” he asked her, finally turning to look at her. Their eyes met and he thought again about how incredible it was that after everything that had happened to her, against all odds, the girl was still alive.

“I have two,” she admitted. “I just don't know which one I should ask. I mean, what if you decide not to answer either because one of them makes you uncomfortable?”

He didn't say anything, but he did begin walking again. The deer, even if it was small, hung heavy on his shoulders and he was beginning to feel tiredness seep into him from the fight against the walkers and the long day of hunting.

“Since you don't seem like much of a talker then,” Beth muttered, “I'll ask you both and maybe you'll give me a reply?”

“Is that your first question?” Daryl couldn't help himself but Beth quickly shook her head.

“No cheating,” she told him sternly. “My first question is whether you know who it was that taught me how to survive... So, do you?”

Daryl was now thankful for the deer he was carrying because hopefully, it covered the way he had tensed at her question. He didn't want to tell her that he was the one who had taught her. It would only make her more curious and then he would never get her to stay away from him. The only problem was that he didn't want to lie to her either. He knew that Beth deserved the truth from him, but he just couldn't bring himself to give it to her.

He decided to just stay silent and hope that she understood what he wasn't saying.

“So you don't know then...or you don't wanna tell me,” Beth concluded. “That's fine for now I guess.”

“Second question?” he wondered, glad that she wasn't pushing him at the moment.

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

Daryl stopped dead in his tracks before turning to face her fully. Beth watched him innocently, as if her question was completely justified, which it absolutely was.

“I mean, you're the only one who hasn't tried to talk to me,” Beth pointed out. “I had to learn your name from the others since you wouldn't introduce yourself.” He kept staring at her. “Daryl?”

Hearing his name slip out of her mouth like that, shook him. The seven months they had been on the road, he had recounted all the times that she had said his name in his mind, just so that he would never forget her voice. Now that she was standing in front of him, her question burning between them and her face covered in confidence, evidence that she wouldn't back down on this one, all he could think about was how _perfect_ she sounded.

She was alive and she had said his name and he wondered briefly why he had stayed away from her to begin with. Why had he denied himself hearing her say his name? Why was it that it felt like he could take down a herd of walkers all on his own now that he had her close to him?

Then he remembered the gunshot. He remembered the way his lips had been sprayed with her blood and how, when he had cried with her cradled tightly to his chest, he had actually tasted her blood, knowing that he would never again hear her sweet and kind voice again.

That feeling of complete and utter despair was what reminded him of why he had chosen to stay away from her. She couldn't die again because he screwed up.

She couldn't die again because of him.

“Were we friends before?” Beth continued and he blinked at her a couple of times. She looked like she desperately wanted him to say something, but he was still trying to figure out what he was supposed to say.

“Nah,” he finally drawled, trying to sound convincing, even though his heart clenched painfully at his own lie. “We never spoke much before,” he told her. “Figured it wouldn' matter much if we did now either.”

Beth watched him intently, looking like she could see right through his bad lies.

“ _Oh_ ,” she whispered and instantly his heart began pounding again as he recalled the night they had been separated and the things he had never gotten to say to her.

When he had seen her alive, he had thought that he might have actually gotten a second chance to do it right this time around, but then he had learned of her memory loss and realized that it wasn't his second chance that had been given to them, but _hers_.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “We were in tha same group though, but we never really got to know each other. Just survived from day to day.”

“We weren't even friends?” Beth frowned at him.

“We weren't _close_ ,” he lied. Silently, he watched her for a little while before nodding his head forward. “We should keep goin'.”

“Yeah...” Beth agreed quietly, turning to look ahead of them.

Daryl did his best to ignore the look of disappointment that crossed Beth's face before they continued to walk.

* * *

When they returned to the farmhouse, it was already dark outside. Maggie, Carol, Tara and Rick hurried outside and Maggie looked over Beth for any injuries, despite the fact that Beth told her that she was fine. Beth understood that her sister still didn't understand just how well Beth could protect herself, but she allowed Maggie to calm her own fears by looking over her, all while meeting Morgan's proud face as he too walked out of the house. Rick helped Daryl take the deer to a place in the backyard where it would be safe to skin it and Carol informed them that Eugene had gotten the water running.

“There's no hot water yet, but he said he might be able to do something about that when we get more firewood,” Tara said, proudly showing Beth her newly washed hair.

“You definitely need a shower,” Maggie said, looking over Beth's blood soaked clothes. “No offense.”

Beth couldn't help but giggle at her sister's scrunched up nose before glancing over at Daryl, who was walking back toward them. When the man held out his hand toward her, she froze for a second, no understanding what he wanted. He clearly wasn't very talkative if his short answers in the forest had been any indication, or maybe he had just been telling the truth when he told her that the two of them had never been close.

Beth doubted that, mostly because he hadn't been able to look her in the eyes after he had told her that. There was no doubt in her mind that Daryl was still keeping something from her because she could feel it deep within her heart as well.

“The squirrels,” Daryl muttered. “Need to skin them too.”

When Beth finally realized that she was still holding on to the squirrels he had caught, she quickly fumbled to take off the strap, offering it to him. He met her eyes when he took it from her and then his eyes seemed to slip so casually down over her body.

“You should take that shower,” he told her. “There's gore all over ya.”

Beth stared at him as he turned around and walked back around the house again where Rick and Carol were waiting on him. She watched him quietly, not saying anything because at the moment she couldn't trust her own voice. Even if she might not have spoken much to Daryl in particular today, she could feel the effects of having gone days talking to Tara, Maggie, Carol and the others without resting her voice.

“You okay, lil' Lady?” Morgan asked from the porch where he sat. Beth offered him a curt nod and a small smile when she finally tore her eyes away from the spot where Daryl had disappeared from. Morgan nodded back thoughtfully, “Did ya strain yourself out there?” Beth swallowed thickly and offered yet another nod. 

She didn't want to waste her voice on answering questions that already had obvious answers. Maggie looked over at Morgan questionably and the man simply sighed, shaking his head.

“Beth's throat gets sore sometimes,” he told Maggie. “If she talks too much during the day, she usually feels the effect during the night. If she doesn't save her voice up, she won't be able to talk tomorrow. Sometimes she's fine though, and can go days talking non-stop, but then it sorta hits her all at once and she needs to rest her voice for a few days.”

Maggie's face fell completely as she looked back at Beth again, “Is that true? Does it hurt much now?”

Beth shook her head and Morgan once again replied, “See, she's just saving her voice. Happens sometimes and then there's no point in tryin' to make her talk 'cause she won't answer. The girl knows her limits...”

“Okay,” Maggie nodded. “Let's go get that water running so you can take a shower, and then find a towel for Daryl as well so he can clean up after skinnin' that deer.”

Beth smiled at her sister and walked toward the house, finally feeling her exhaustion setting in. She wasn't entirely sure how she would manage to stand in the shower, but she knew that she needed it more than anything. Another thing she knew, was that she still wasn't ready to just let go of talking to Daryl.

As she passed Morgan, she gently put her hand on his shoulder and squeezed. He covered her small hand with is larger one and looked up at her.

“Proud of ya, lil' Lady,” he told her and she could only smile at him before walking inside. It seemed like most of the others were already asleep. Michonne was sitting in the living room, reading something and she only looked up shortly at Beth and nodded at her before Beth ascended the stairs. Maggie and Tara followed her to show her how the water would work and then they told her to sleep well before retreating into their own rooms.

Beth showered quickly.  Ev en if she wanted to savor the feeling of finally having running water  she needed to be ready for her chance. She pulled on her flannel pajama pants and a long-sleeved shirt because she felt a little cold. Once she was dressed she opened her door a little so that she would be able to hear if anyone walked into the bathroom before drying her hair the best she could with her towel.

Absentmindedly, she began humming a little when she finally heard the sound of water running. Daryl was taking his shower and she knew that it would only be a matter of time before he went to his room.

Her thoughts were confirmed when she heard the bathroom door open again and then heavy footsteps that were walking toward their end of the hallway. Before she could second guess herself and talk herself out of it, Beth swung her door open and stood in the doorway. It took less than a second for Daryl's deep blue eyes to connect with hers and she kept herself from swallowing loudly at the feeling she suddenly got in her stomach.

His hair was still dripping wet and he was wearing a new pair of clean jeans, although they were just as torn up as the old ones he had worn in the forest. He was still wearing the vest she had grown accustomed to seeing him in around the house, but instead of wearing a shirt underneath it, he was just wearing a plain white wife-beater. Beth couldn't help but taking in his form, biting her lip when as she saw his muscles tensing a bit, which only caused them to flex more.

He looked as nervous as she felt, even though he was trying to cover it up.

Beth was forced to clear her throat a bit, already feeling the soreness kicking in. She'd had a long day and even if she might not have spoken much during it, the last few days had been spent laughing and conversing with both Tara and Maggie. Her vocal cords were bound to be strained for a few days in turn and she had expected it. Still, she knew that she needed to get what she wanted to say out.

“Hi,” she said lamely, her voice still not as raspy as it could get. Daryl only watched her quietly, not looking like he was going to start talking any time soon, so she continued. “I just wanted to say thank you for answering my questions today.”

The man blinked at her a couple of times before nodding curtly, his lips pressing together in a thin line, “Didn't tell ya much...” His voice was quiet but she had heard him just fine.

“I know I kind of cornered you,” she continued, “and I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable.” She watched him before she felt her cheeks heat up and she smiled looking down. “I guess I'm kinda doin' it again, aren't I? Cornering you...” she said, still smiling but not daring to look up at him. She didn't want him to be mad at her for doing it and from what she had understood about him so far, he wasn't exactly the kind of man who enjoyed talking about his feelings and such.

“I just wanted to thank you, I guess,” she finally shrugged. When she looked up, his eyebrows were drawn together in a frown and he was watching her curiously. Her eyes moved on their own accord down to his chest, where she could see just a hint of some black ink look out from where the material of his shirt didn't cover his skin. A thin line than disappeared underneath his shirt, hiding the rest of his tattoo from her eyes.

Forcing herself to meet his eyes again, she noticed that he was still just watching her, ever silent.

“For what?” he finally asked, his tone a little rough.

Beth could only shrug once more, not knowing herself what she was actually saying anymore. It just felt good to thank Daryl because even if they hadn't spoken much, she had at least gotten a small feeling of what kind of a person he was. She had seen right through him when he had tried to be vague and she supposed that on some level, she might be thanking him for  _letting_ her see through him.

“Being willing to talk to me,” she replied slowly. “Clarifying that we weren't really friends before...” She watched something in his eyes flash for about a millisecond before a calm mask once again covered it. It was all the proof she had needed though. “Even if we weren't friends before,” she started, “I would very much like for us to at least not ignore each other. We live here together and I-” She was forced to clear her throat a bit. “I would like to get to know you, if you're okay with that?”

S he almost sighed when he didn't reply immediately. Before she could start thinking about how a person could be so incredibly quiet, always observing but almost never speaking, Daryl finally opened his mouth.

“Not sure if it's a good idea,” he said and this time, she could hear the sincerity in his tone. Daryl seemed to truly believe that it would be better for her not to get to know him. “If it's what ya really want though, I s'pose I'm not gonna stop ya from talkin' to me,” he continued and Beth couldn't help but grin at him.

“Really?” she beamed, feeling something flutter in her stomach. In Daryl's eyes, she noticed something too; something she wasn't sure she could even name.

“Mhm...” Daryl hummed in agreement. “Ya better go to bed though. Must be tired after runnin' in tha woods all day.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Beth agreed. She got the sudden urge to step forward and embrace him, but she wasn't willing to push her luck just yet. “Good night, Daryl,” she smiled at him backing into her bedroom again slowly, her eyes never leaving his.

“G'night... _Beth._ ”

When he had spoken her name, it had been in a half-exhale. He sounded a bit breathy and looked as if he had never believed he would say her name ever again. Beth filed that away in her brain as even more proof that there was more going on than Daryl was letting on but she knew that it would probably be brought up sometime in the future.

She got into her room and closed her door, leaning against it with her eyes shut tightly.

Yeah, whatever it was that Daryl was keeping from her would have to come out sooner or later, but until then, she wasn't going to push him. If the man needed time to deal with her being alive again but was still agreeing to let her get to know him, she wouldn't pressure him.

After all, she had finally had a moment to speak to Daryl after trying to get him alone for four days, but unfortunately, their short conversations seemed to only have worked to make Beth even more curious about the man and the swirling feelings in her stomach that she got whenever he looked at her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okaaaay! First of all, I just wanna say that originally, I had intended for Daryl to stubbornly not say ANYTHING while Beth talked to him, up until that final conversation in the hallway, but then I just couldn't help myself, because I miss my babies and I needed them to talk, even if Beth was the one who led the conversation while Daryl was mostly just grunting and nodding! ^^
> 
> Now, to the questions:
> 
> 1) What did you think of the chapter in general?
> 
> 2) What was your favorite part to read?
> 
> 3) Would you like me to continue writing long chapters like this one, or would you want shorter ones?
> 
> It would mean a lot for me to know and please don't forget that your support is always appreciated and comments are my life source and feed my fingers to type faster! But yeah, they won't be typing anything until Sunday, because exams... Yuck...
> 
> Leave a comment and I'll love you forever!
> 
> Thank you for reading and I hope you have a wonderful day! :)
> 
> xx


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The people on the farmhouse learn one of the side effects of Beth being shot. Meanwhile, Daryl learns something else too about the blonde girl that is still confusing him...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! This is just a quick note, promise! :)
> 
> First off, thank you to everyone who commented the last chapter! It really means a lot to me to find out what you think and your support has been amazing so far (the story has PASSED 100 reviews on fanfiction and I'm not even at chapter 10 yet (which is a favorite of mine))! Secondly, I wanna say sorry for taking so long with the update, but school and real life are messing with me and I've been very busy... Although, I've come to the decision that I'm gonna try and keep the chapters about the same length they've been so far (between 7k and 9k) with the exception of one or two which might become longer... I'll also do my very best to give you guys weekly chapters, but I can't make promises to update EVERY week. In case I'm missing a week, just keep yourself updated on it on either my tumblr or my twitter! :)
> 
> Now, I'm putting up a small WARNING in this chapter for Merle-esque, racist words and maybe a kind of "scary" dream sequence, but I don't think it's particularly scary at all...
> 
> And btw, I wanna know how you people feel about eventual, (possible but not guaranteed) smut?
> 
> Now, please enjoy! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 8

Daryl knew that she was watching him.

She had been quietly observing him for five days already and he couldn't help but wait for the moment someone else caught onto her and asked him about it. What was he supposed to say when they asked him why Beth would sometimes come and sit on the grass next to him while he worked on the fences, doing nothing to help him, but only tilt her head curiously with a lazy smile on her face? Why hadn't he told her to just leave him alone yet?

He swallowed while he kept hammering on the fence, not daring to look back toward the porch, where he knew she sat.

Morgan's prediction had indeed been true. The day after Daryl and Beth had returned from the woods, Beth had woken up without her voice. Morgan had explained it to those of them who hadn't known about her condition, and Daryl had only clenched his fists when the image of Dawn shooting Beth from underneath her chin flashed in his mind.

The first day, Beth had stayed in her room. Daryl figured it had to do with her wanting to rest up her throat as much as possible, although he knew that Maggie and Carol had gone in to check on her a few times and bring her some soup that Carol had cooked up for the young blonde. On one side Daryl was a bit glad that Beth hadn't come out because he knew that he wouldn't have been able stop himself from checking on her, even if it was just from afar. On the other side though... Daryl found himself missing her more than he had ever missed her.

Now that she was alive and had broken down that wall that he had begun building around himself after they had been reunited, he was quickly finding himself addicted to just seeing her around the house. Each and every night that he went to bed he forced himself not to knock on her door, just to check on her, and he was thankful for the fact that he did have _some_ self-control.

The second day, Beth came out of her room with a weary and tired smile on her face, but the first thing she did when she walked out of the house, was to promptly walk over to where he was cleaning his motorcycle and sit on the grass. At first he had panicked, glancing around only to see that Rick and the others hadn't even looked their way. He had glanced down at Beth who sat cross-legged, looking up at him with blinking, kind and all innocent eyes. Not saying anything, he had simply nodded curtly, acknowledging her presence before moving on to keep cleaning his bike.

It continued like that the following days. Sometimes she sat a bit closer, other times she sat on the porch. He overheard her trying to tell Tara and Rosita something one day, but her voice had been so raspy that the other two women had told her not to talk and that whate ver it was that she was trying to say to them could wait until she got better. That night, Daryl had gone out for a smoke after dinner and Beth had followed him outside. He had been standing on the grass while she had leaned against one of the pillars on the porch,  seeming to be  taking him in. After a long silence, he had told her that she sounded like she had been chain-smoking since she was seven years old and had something stuck in her throat. He had been horrified at himself for saying it out loud, but Beth had only watched him for a moment before a grin had spread across her face, her pearly white teeth glistening in the moonlight as she shook her head at him. Daryl could have sworn that he had seen her cheeks turn a shade darker, however, at the time he told himself that it was simply his mind that was playing tricks on him. Beth had let out a raspy sound that sounded a lot like a half-choked chuckle and he hadn't been able to hide his own smirk before releasing the smoke he had drawn in, stealing one last glance at her before she headed inside.

* * *

On the fourth day of having lost her voice, Beth began to become restless. She was still able to work, although it frustrated her to no end that she couldn't communicate with the people around her. Maggie was worried about her but Beth made sure that Morgan told Maggie that this was normal for Beth, and it had been for these seven months. It didn't happen as frequently as it used to happen since she first got her voice back, just often enough for Beth and Morgan both to get used to it. Either way, when Glenn, Rick and Michonne went on a run together with Sasha who had complained about getting restless on the farm, they brought back two full bags of tea packages.

“I didn't know which flavor you liked, so I just took them all,” Glenn had sheepishly told her while scratching the back of his head and Beth had embraced him so tightly that she was sure that she might have fractured one of his ribs. It didn't escape Beth's notice that Daryl had glanced over at them because of the exchange, although, he didn't seem bothered by it.

Beth wasn't really sure why she would think that he _would be_ bothered, but it had kind of been the first thing that had crossed her mind when she had sensed his eyes on her. Still, during the days that she had lost her voice she had done her fair share of watching him too, so it wasn't like she wasn't giving him any attention.

Not that he was asking for it either.

_ Maybe she was freaking him out by always being near him and watching him in silence? _

No. Daryl would tell Beth if she was bothering him in any way, she knew it in her gut. Even though he seemed to be the kind of man who carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, she was fairly sure that he would at least give her a hint or do something as rash as actually snapping at her to stay away. Until he did that, she would keep trying to show him that she really wanted to get to know him and that she enjoyed being close to him, even if they didn't talk.

Also, it wasn't as if she was actually clinging to him in a physical way. There was always space for him to more around and sometimes she even sat on the porch and watched him from afar. Then there was that one night that she had followed him outside when he had gone for a smoke and he had stayed silent before telling her that she sounded like someone who had been smoking their whole life, and for some reason, the thought alone (because she was sure she had never smoked a cigarette in her entire life) had made her laugh. It had been the first thing he had said to her since she had lost her voice and it had felt so absolutely _right_ , as if it was something that Daryl _would_ say to her and it shocked her a bit that she just knew it.

Nevertheless, Carol started making the tea for Beth and Beth drank three cups that first night, then two again on the fifth morning and she could already feel that scratchy feeling in her throat starting to disappear.

* * *

On the seventh morning Beth woke up curled up in her bed.

She blinked a couple of times, her eyes adjusting to the light in the room as she stretched a bit. Clearing her throat a couple of times, she could feel that the soreness had gone away, which meant that her voice was probably back again.

“Hmm... Good morning,” she said to herself, smiling when there was no rasp whatsoever. Quickly she got out of bed and pulled on a hoodie over her pajama shirt, not bothering to change out of her flannel pajama pants. She brushed her teeth and washed her face before pulling up her hair in a messy bun on the top of her head and then hurried down the stairs to the kitchen.

“Good morning, Carol!” she beamed happily at the older woman who turned around and looked at her with a smile on her face.

“Beth, your voice is back,” Carol acknowledged. “And good morning to you too.”

“Nice to hear your voice again,” Noah said from the table where he sat next to Morgan, looking over something.

“You sound a lot better, lil' Lady. Just don't forget to be careful for a couple of more days,” Morgan said kindly.

“Maybe it's better if you keep drinking the tea too?” Carol suggested. “Just to be on the safe side.”

“Sure,” Beth agreed. “Have you seen Maggie around? I wanted to tell her that I was doing better so she'll stop worrying about me.”

“She went on a run to the pharmacy with the other ladies,” Morgan said. “The men are working on fixing that last part of the fence outside though...” Her friend trailed off and gave her a pointed look. She knew that Morgan noticed the way she was always close to Daryl, although he hadn't asked her about it yet. Beth was just waiting for her friend to confront her about what happened in the woods that day that she had gone after Daryl, but she wasn't sure what she would say to him if he did. Nothing _had_ happened, after all. She and Daryl had just talked a bit, and even that had been after she had basically forced Daryl to do so. Then he had kept something from her and she had just gotten even more curious about him. She guessed that she could ask Maggie or Glenn or someone about it, but she didn't want to; she wanted to figure Daryl out herself, without any help from anyone else.

If Morgan ever decided to ask her, she figured she could tell him just that. She wasn't sure why she felt so drawn to Daryl, but it was nice to be around someone who didn't look at her as if she might break at any moment. The only thing she saw in Daryl's eyes from time to time was something akin to actual _pain_ which only convinced her even more that there was something that he was keeping from her.

The implication Morgan had made about her maybe wanting to know where the men were, was clearly a hint from him that he knew that she would be looking for Daryl next. Morgan knowing that she wanted to get closer to Daryl and get to know him wasn't exactly the worst thing that could happen to her, but the thought did make her blush a bit, because for seven months now she had only had Morgan to be around and the man had become somewhat of a father figure for her.

“Okay,” was all Beth said before walking toward the door. She shot Morgan one last smile, telling him not to worry about her too much and he just shook his head at her.

“You're going out in you pajamas?” he called after her then but she just giggled.

“I'll be right back to change,” she said. “I just need to do something first...”

She walked outside and scanned the area. The men were working on the fence that was the furthest away from the house and Beth quickly walked toward them. She could see Carl standing with his hands on his hips close to his dad while watching him work. Tyreese, Father Gabriel, Glenn and even Eugene were hammering on the wall while Abraham was keeping watch so that a walker wouldn't stumble out of nowhere and attack them. Ever since Daryl and Beth had returned that night they had been extra careful, in case another smaller group of walkers decided to walk their way. The risk was bigger when they worked on the far fences, since the sound of the hammers resonated through the woods. Beth knew that the pits they had dug though would keep at least some of the biters from getting too close to them.

Finally, she spotted Daryl and her breath caught in her throat a bit as she stopped walking. The front of his shirt was sweaty from having worked so hard on building the wall and once again, he was wearing a sleeveless shirt. The muscle in his arms flexed as he picked up a bottle of water and drank from it greedily, his eyes closed as he leaned his head back a bit. Beth could feel her mouth dropping open and she immediately wished that she had had some sort of camera or something to sneak a picture at him.

Then she felt absolutely horrified at herself for thinking such thoughts. She was sure that if having impure thoughts about a slightly older man was a capital offense, she would be rotting in jail by now. Though, when she thought about it, she wasn't really sure how old Daryl was, and besides, there was nothing going on between them, right? They were just on their way of becoming friends...or something. Although, to be quite honest, she couldn't remember if she had ever been particularly bothered by age differences in relationships, but she knew that she couldn't see anything wrong with a girl of her age getting together with someone like Daryl... _Hypothetically_.

She closed her mouth when she felt his eyes on her and blushed when she met them, an unspoken question in them as they roamed over her body.

“What are ya wearin'?” he asked her and a second later he looked like he had taken a huge bite out of a lemon. Clearly, he had not intended to ask her _that._

She wasn't bothered by his question though, instead she only smiled at him. “I wanted to tell ya that my voice is back,” she said happily as she walked closer to him.

He lowered the bottle of water and nodded thoughtfully and she certainly didn't miss the way his eyes lit up a bit when he heard her speak. “I'm happy for ya,” he grunted then and she could immediately see the switch flip inside of him. The walls that she had in silence been pulling down these last few days were suddenly all up again and he looked as if he couldn't wait to get her away from himself.

“I guess I'll see you later then,” Beth sighed, feeling the disappointment inside of her.

“Mhm...” Daryl hummed quietly before turning his back to her, walking back to the fence and getting back to work. She saw the edge of another tattoo on his shoulder, sticking out from underneath his shirt and angel-winged vest.

As she walked back toward the farmhouse in silence, she couldn't help but wonder just how many tattoos the man had.

* * *

Daryl didn't know what was wrong with him, he just knew that something was very, _very_ off.

For the first time in a long, long time, he just wasn't able to make up his mind about what to do and what not to do. He had thought that things were going well with him learning how to be close to Beth again, but that had been while she hadn't been able to speak. The second she had opened her mouth and spoken to him, he had felt a rush of happiness for the girl but also panicked a bit because her having her voice back meant that he could once again start asking him questions that he wasn't sure he could answer. When he had brushed her off he had immediately known that he had let her down once again because of how her face had fallen. He had gone back to working on the wall without sparing her as much as a second glance even though his heart had done that funny thing again where it kind of clenched uncomfortably in his chest. Beth hadn't come around to keep him company since then and that had been three days ago.

He found himself missing her presence, but he told himself that some distance between them was only for the better. Maybe if she finally saw him for what he really was, she would back off completely and realize that a piece of white, redneck trash like him wasn't worth her even sparing him a second glance? Then he could go back to watching over her from a distance, only to make sure that she was safe. She would never have to know that he kept an eye on her every time he saw her walking toward the edge of the forest with Rosita, Tara or Sasha and she most certainly would never have to know that he would gladly throw himself between her and a walker, if it ever came down to it.

He would give his life for her, as long as it meant that she would stay alive and he knew that some of the people in their group suspected it, although no one would ever say it out loud.

On some level he wished that he could tell Beth just how much she means to him, but he was afraid that it would only make her uncomfortable. Besides, what if she thought that he was some older creep and became scared of him or something? He wouldn't want that.

So yes, he would most certainly give his life for Beth Greene, but no, he did absolutely not want her to know about it.

* * *

_ They were everywhere. She was surrounded. _

_ Clutching the gun in her hand, she aimed at the walkers that were coming at her, firing shot after shot. They fell slowly, one by one and her ears were ringing. The light was so bright that she could hardly see; not yet having gotten used to the bright light of the outside. _

_ She turned around and called for the person who was running behind her, telling them to hurry up because they needed to get out of there as fast as possible before more biters came. Then she felt a cold hand on her shoulder and she turned around, gasping when a rotting man surged forward, his teeth digging into her throat. _

_ She fell backwards, eyes wide, the dead man pushing her to the ground and she closed her eyes, preparing for the hard concrete to hit her back and for her heart to give out as she bled to death in a parking lot in a place that she could no longer remember. _

_ The pain never came though and she snapped her eyes open, only to be surrounded by complete darkness again. Lifting her hands, she came in contact with hard wood and instantly panic rose inside of her. _

“ _No, no, no...” she chanted to herself, eyes widening as she pushed against the wood. “No! Help me!” she screamed, tears springing to her eyes as dirt somehow made its way into the coffin. “Help me, please! God! I'm alive! I'm_ alive! _” she continued to yell. The more she tried to raise her voice, the more dirt fell into the coffin. She could feel the air disappearing but she kept pushing against the lid. Unlike the last time, she couldn't get it open and then she felt it: a hand moving beside her. She glanced down and a blood curling scream escaped her throat just as two greyish, half-rotten arms came out of the dirt and wrapped around her throat._

_ Choking, she tried to pry the hands away from herself, but they wouldn't budge. She could feel others clawing at her sides, tearing her skin open as she laid helpless in the coffin, still trying to scream out for help, scratching at the wood. Wet blood made its way down her arms as her fingernails fell off one by one. _

_ She kept screaming, until the snarls and growls and everything around her just  _ stopped.

* * *

Daryl had gone to bed a little earlier than usual so that he could wake up in time for his midnight watch shift.

“It's quiet,” Michonne had told him when they had switched.

“It's always quiet 'til it isn't,” he had replied and he could see in her eyes that she agreed with him. Out of everyone in the group, he knew that Michonne and Rick were probably the two who understood him the most. They had all been through a lot of course; every last one if them had lost someone they held dear, but Michonne and Rick were the once who understood him when he talked about things being too good to be true. The others had adapted well to the farm and at some times, Daryl almost thought that they believed that they would always be safe there. He, however, knew that it was only a matter of time before things went to shit again, so he would always be prepared for it. Michonne and Rick were the only ones besides him that were still always on high alert and prepared, insisting that they keep up the night watch as well as daily perimeter checks that Beth and Morgan had been doing since they found the farm. Everyone else in their group had followed their lead without protest, but Daryl knew that deep down they felt safe enough to say that they wouldn't need to check the pits every day.

When Glenn finally came to switch with Daryl, he patted the younger man on the shoulder before heading upstairs to the bathroom to clean up a bit. He hadn't taken a nice shower for three days now and after working hard all day, he needed it more than ever. Besides, he figured he owed it to himself to relax a bit.

Eugene had finally gotten the pan in the basement working and Abraham had gone out to the woods with Morgan the other day to get them firewood. Daryl reveled in the hot water, closing his eyes as he let it wash away all the dirt from the last couple of days. He didn't want to waste the water, but he figured he should probably try and suggest to the others that they somehow try to fill the farm's water supplies with water from a stream that wasn't too far away. Eugene could probably figure out a filtering system...

Daryl got out of the shower and dried himself off before pulling on the same dirty jeans he had been wearing earlier. He changed into a clean shirt though before putting the dirty one in the basket that Morgan had shown them. Wiping the fogged up mirror, he looked at himself in the mirror, noticing just how untrimmed his beard had gotten. He chuckled to himself, thinking how he might even rival Rick soon. Tomorrow he would get to shaving, or at least trimming it down a bit. He didn't like being completely clean shaved since he had gotten used to the facial hair by now. It would probably just feel weird, but he absolutely needed to get a haircut though, because the hair might bother him if he went on another hunt. He'd ask Carol to cut it tomorrow since she had the most experience with the scissors.

Just as he was about to walk out of the bathroom, he heard someone running in the hallway. He paused briefly before quietly turning the lock, opening the door. His ears picked up a sound coming from the end of the hallway where his room was, more specifically, Beth's room. The hallway was dark, but he could see a small flickering light illuminating the end of the hallway. He walked quietly toward his bedroom, listening intently. Voices could be heard from Beth's room, but they were hushed, so it was difficult to hear what the people were saying. When he got close enough, his heart dropped.

Muffled cries and quiet, choked sobs could be heard from the inside and he instantly recognized it as Beth, because he had heard her cry a few times himself when they had been alone. Without thinking, he approached the door, noting that it had indeed been left ajar. He glanced inside and saw Morgan sitting at the end of the bed, a candle lit on Beth's nightstand. Morgan was murmuring in a hushed tone while Beth sat curled up in the far corner of the bed, her head buried in her arms as her shoulders shook slightly. Her whimpers were quiet, but they resonated in Daryl's head, getting louder each second he stood watching them in silence.

“It's okay,” Morgan whispered. “You're okay. You're safe.” The man's hand seemed to be resting on Beth's foot, almost as if he didn't dare touching her.

“It was so real, Morgan,” Beth whispered back. “I couldn't get out... I couldn't get out this time...” She sounded so small and vulnerable that all Daryl wanted to do was burst into the room and wrap her up in his arms. He would hold her all night long if that was what she needed from him. He'd do anything she asked him to do.

“It was just a dream, lil' Lady,” Morgan replied. “Just a bad dream...”

Daryl watched as Beth suddenly surged forward, embracing Morgan tightly as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. The man hugged her back, his hand rubbing small circles on her back as he murmured reassuring words to her that were so quiet that Daryl could no longer hear them. The sight of the two of them so close caused a feeling flare up inside of Daryl that he most certainly did not want to acknowledge. He took a step back and then hurried into his room, not wanting neither Beth nor Morgan to see him. They would immediately understand that he had been eavesdropping or at least that he had watched them in something that could only be described as an intimate moment between two friends...

Because that was what it was, wasn't it? Morgan and Beth were just friends, weren't they?

' _Ya think the ole' man is banging ya chick?_ ' Merle's voice snorted in his head as he forced himself to lay down on the bed. ' _Ya jealous of tha' nigger for gettin_ _'_ _ta tap that before ya, Darylina?_ '

Daryl grumbled to himself as he turned on his side and shut his eyes tightly, willing the image of Beth crying against Morgan's shoulder away. He wasn't jealous because he had no reason to be. Morgan and Beth weren't together. They had just been surviving together for seven months and established some kind of bond that he didn't even want to ask about.

Then, his mind went to the weeks that he and Beth had spent together alone. If they hadn't been separated,  _they_ might have been the ones who had survived together for seven months. What might have happened between them then, if he had ever given into those...  _feelings_ , that he had been starting to feel after such a short time of being only with Beth? Was it so absurd to think that Morgan might have developed the same feelings that he had gotten for Beth? After all, Morgan and Beth had been together for longer than Daryl and Beth were...

He really needed to stop thinking about it.

Tired and needing rest, he decided that if he was still thinking about it tomorrow, he would do something to maybe ease his mind a bit.

He just hoped that he wouldn't hate what he might learn.

* * *

“You have to be more sure of yourself when you throw them,” Morgan told Carl as he picked up Beth's throwing knife that had ended up embedded into the grass below the tree where the target was put up.

“I was aiming for that root,” Carl tried but Morgan only chuckled and shook his head at him.

“Sure you were,” Noah rolled his eyes. “Is it my turn yet?” he then asked eagerly.

The two of them had been asking Morgan to teach them how to throw knives ever since they had seen Beth's skills and Morgan had finally gotten around to it.

“Oh, come on, Noah! I only got like one shot,” Carl complained with a groan.

“Well, maybe you should just ask Beth to teach you since you clearly can't seem to get what Morgan is telling you to do,” Noah said sarcastically. “This is how it's done,” he said, taking the knife out of Carl's hands. Morgan crossed his eyes, watching their interactions in amusement as he came to stand by Michonne's side. The woman had been hanging around in the backyard, keeping an eye on things while also watching baby Judith.

Noah lifted his hand threw the knife.  Morgan pressed his lips tightly together to keep a snort from escaping him when it missed the tree by a good couple of inches.

“Maybe you both need to learn from Beth,” Michonne suggested. “Knife throwing surely isn't something you can just _learn_ magically. It takes time to master...”

Carl groaned, “Beth was a natural at it!”

“The lil' Lady had good aim before that,” Morgan pointed out.

“So? I've got good aim too,” Carl continued. “I'm good with a gun.”

“Beth was good with other weapons as well,” Morgan said calmly. “Give it time, lil' Grimes. Patience is a virtue, after all.”

Carl rolled his eyes at Morgan's nickname for him, but Morgan could see that there was a small smile playing on the boy's lips. It seemed that the kid enjoyed being compared to his father and Morgan knew that it made  Carl's d ay when Morgan listed the similarities between  father and son. At times, it was a little hard for Morgan when he remembered Duane and the way his own son's life had ended. If only he had been more prepared... If he had only killed the monster his wife had become in time, his son might have been alive today. That would always be something that haunted him, no matter how many times Beth would tell him that it wasn't his fault.

Beth had been a saving grace for him.

Sure, he had gotten himself together enough to start looking for a sanctuary, but he hadn't exactly been all clear in the head then either. He had been grumpy as hell in the beginning of their friendship, but as time passed, Beth somehow made her way into his heart without even uttering a single word. The girl had had a way to express herself through gestures and those innocent, blue eyes of hers and soon, he had found himself becoming protective of the girl.

He had known that she had family somewhere, or at least people who had cared enough to actually take their time to bury her. He had thought that if he kept her safe and reunited her with her group, he might somehow make up for the way things had turned out with Duane. Maybe it would ease his mind to know that he had at least managed to save  _someone_ .

He started caring for the blonde and if anyone asked him today, he could without a doubt say that he loved her. She was like the daughter he had never had and the two of them were close. They understood each other perfectly without communicating through words and he understood how people like Maggie and Rick and everyone else in Rick's group got confused sometimes when they did so.

From what Morgan could see, Maggie was the one who was having the most trouble adjusting to him and Beth having bonded as they had. It was clear that the young woman couldn't understand that Morgan would do anything for Beth, just as the blonde would do anything for him as well. They had been surviving together and they had been  _living_ together in this farmhouse for months. They  _knew_ each other and they cared about each other. They had been a family before Morgan had come across them at that abandoned gas-station but Morgan understood that it would take time for the others to understand that.

Morgan watched as Noah and Carl began bickering about the knives again, just as someone behind him cleared their throat. He turned around, only to see that the archer, Daryl, was standing with his crossbow slung over his shoulders by the door.

“Morgan,” he acknowledged with a curt nod and an even curter tone. The man looked at Michonne and Morgan noticed how his lips twitched upwards a bit at the sight of the baby girl who held her hands out for him to take her. “Not today, lil' Asskicker,” Daryl said, his tone a lot softer when he spoke to little Judith. He turned back to Morgan, his eyes getting all serious again. “Would ya mind goin' on a perimeter check with me?”

Morgan raised an eyebrow at him, confused as to why the hunter suddenly seemed interested in approaching him. Daryl Dixon sure had been clear from the first time that they had met about what he thought about Morgan's sanity. Sure, the two of them hadn't interacted much since that first night when they had discussed how they were all connected to Beth, but Morgan was fairly sure that Daryl hadn't changed his opinion on him. At least the man hadn't made it clear to Morgan that he had, so until proven differently, Morgan would keep thinking that Daryl wasn't so fond of him.

“Sure,” Morgan drawled before turning to Michonne. “Make sure the boys don't poke their eyes out with Beth's knife, will you?”

“Sure thing,” Michonne nodded while Judith happily babbled on in baby gibberish.

Morgan walked over to the small table and grabbed his own knife for protection before sheathing it into his belt. Daryl turned his head and nodded toward the woods before starting to lead the way. Morgan knew that there was something going on, but he knew enough to not pressure the man into speaking to him. From what he had understood about Daryl, it was that the hunter was a complex person who liked his privacy. If Daryl wanted to talk about something, Morgan would have to wait for him to bring it up. Morgan almost paused when he suddenly recognized the similarity between Beth's behavior and Daryl's, but then he realized that it could just be a coincidence. Unless of course one thought about how Daryl and Beth had known each other for a good two years or so before Beth had been thought to have died.

Rick had told Morgan some parts of the story, but it had been difficult for the former deputy to talk about it. It was evident though that it had been hard on all of the people in their group that had known Beth, so Morgan hadn't pressured anyone into telling him more, even though he was a bit curious.

Morgan and Daryl walked together in the back woods for a while before they came across the first part of the fence. They followed it around the farmland, neither of them speaking even though Morgan could sense that Daryl was trying to figure out where to start. It took another ten minutes for Daryl to actually open his mouth and speak, and by then they had reached the furthest part of the fence, close to the pits.

“What happened last night?” Daryl asked as he stopped walking.

“What do you mean?” Morgan frowned. “You have to be a bit more specific.”

He noticed how Daryl's fist clenched and his jaw tightened as he shifted from one foot to the other. “I heard her last night,” Daryl clarified. “I heard her cryin'.”

Morgan watched him silently for a beat. “What exactly do you want to know?” he asked, a frown still etched on his face. “Wasn't it clear what was going on?”

“She... She was cryin' and ya said somethin' about a dream?” Daryl said, but it came out more as a question. It was clear that the man was frustrated.

“She was havin' a panic attack,” Morgan said calmly. “She gets 'em from time to time, when her nightmares get bad enough, I suppose.”

“Nightmares...?” Daryl mumbled, almost to himself, but Morgan nodded nonetheless.

“Yeah. They've become less frequent though,” he told the other man. “Usually she can handle them fine on her own, but sometimes she needs someone to reassure her that they were just dreams.”

Daryl looked at the ground, “What does she dream 'bout?”

“Digging herself outta that grave,” Morgan said bluntly. “Being buried, getting attacked by walkers... Everything, I suppose. The one where she gets buried is still the one that triggers the panic though. She dreams that she can't dig herself out and it suffocates her. That's why she can barely breathe when she wakes up...” Morgan waited for Daryl to show any kind of reaction to what he was being told, but the hunter didn't seem to want to give anything away. “Now, I don't know how much you heard last night and maybe I shouldn't even be tellin' you this since Beth sees it as a weakness, but I figured you deserved to know, considering how she keeps going to you and all that.”

At those words Daryl snapped his head up and glared at Morgan. “What the hell are ya goin' on 'bout?” he demanded to know.

“It isn't any of my business what you and Beth do, but I ain't blind,” Morgan said calmly. “You and she were _clearly_ close before and Beth is picking up on it, which is why she's drawn to you.”

“We weren't close,” Daryl all but growled at him, stepping closer, trying to intimidate him, but Morgan stood his ground. “And yer right. It ain't none of yer business!”

Morgan lifted his hands in surrender. “Calm down, Dixon,” he said.

“I ain't gonna calm down when yer just standin' there accusin' me of doin' shit with Beth!” Daryl snapped, anger and something else all over his face.

“I'm just tellin' you what I'm seeing,” Morgan said. “Beth is like a daughter to me, so of course I'm gonna keep an eye on her. She hasn't said anything to me, but she doesn't have to, because I can _see_ how she keeps going to you, even though she doesn't remember you.” Daryl opened his mouth as if to speak, but then shut it quickly, as if not finding any words. “I'm not gonna pry and ask you to tell me why you've been pushing her away, but I'm just telling you want I see.” Morgan sighed deeply before continuing in a softer tone, not wanting to spook the hunter with what he was about to say. “Finding someone in a world that has gone to shit is hard as it is and very, very rare,” he said. “I'm not gonna stand here and make assumptions, but I just want to tell you that I can see that you're a good man and that you care for Beth and wouldn't let her get hurt. So I'm gonna trust that you'd protect her if it ever came down to it and that you'd do anything for her, which also includes staying away from her if that's what she chooses.”

He could almost see the wheels turning in Daryl's mind as clear shock appeared on the hunter's face. Morgan could see that whatever Daryl had been expecting, it hadn't been this kind of conversation.

“Although I am gonna make one thing clear though,” Morgan said, taking a step forward, narrowing his eyes at Daryl. “If you ever do anything to hurt the lil' Lady, I'm not gonna have to deal with you, because by then she probably would have kicked your ass already. I'm just warnin' you to be prepared, because she sure can get angry when something bothers her, so don't push her too far.”

Daryl just stared at him for a moment, his eyebrows drawn together in thought.

“I wouldn't do anythin' to hurt her,” he said after a moment. “She's better of without me though.”

Then, Morgan saw something flicker in Daryl's eyes that he recognized. The pain that seemed to flash in the archer's eyes was something that Morgan had never thought he would see, mostly because he had never expected Daryl Dixon to even approach him. Yet, here they were and it appeared that Daryl had accidentally let one of his walls drop a bit, revealing that there was indeed something more going on, which Morgan had suspected.

When Morgan had told Daryl that he wasn't going to pry, he had meant it; he wouldn't do it, mainly out of respect for Beth's forgotten memories, but also out of respect for the person that the girl had become while she had been with him. He didn't want to know about Beth's past before the girl figured it out herself but he didn't think he would ever even begin to cover whatever relationship that Beth had had with Daryl before she had been shot.

Daryl sure as hell wasn't going to ever tell Morgan anything, but Morgan found himself hoping that the archer wouldn't keep pushing Beth away. Beth was a bright, young girl and Morgan was sure that the reason that she had been hanging around Daryl all week long was because she had felt that there was something more going on there and that Daryl was holding back on something.

Whatever it was, Morgan hoped that they found it in themselves to talk it over some time and maybe reconnect as friends, or whatever it was that they had been before.

“I ain't gonna judge you, Daryl Dixon,” Morgan told him with finality. “As I said, I believe you're a good man, and clearly, Beth does too. She stays away from people she isn't comfortable around.” Daryl didn't say anything though. He just kept looking at the ground as if thinking about Beth and everything he was holding in. “We should probably get back,” Morgan said after a moment. “The lil' Lady is gonna go nuts if Noah and Carl ruin her knives. She loves those sharp things more than anything.”

His comment made Daryl's mouth twitch again and the man looked up at him, meeting his eyes finally. He could see that Daryl was still thinking about something, but there was also something akin to acceptance in there.

_ Huh _ , Morgan thought to himself, when he realized that Daryl seemed to be able to communicate through his eyes just like Beth did too. Was that something the girl had picked up from the hunter as well or was it just another coincidental similarity between the two of them?

Neither Morgan nor Daryl said anything to the other as they walked back to the farmhouse, but there seemed to be a new understanding between them. One thing Morgan was sure of though: Daryl Dixon had a lot of thinking ahead of him to do, especially when it came to deciding whether or not he wanted Beth to know about the  _ real _ relationship they had had before she had gotten shot or not.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! This chapter was kind of meant to give you a hint at what Beth's been dealing with the past seven months, as a consequence of her being shot. To summarize: Her voice is fucked up sometimes, she has nightmares about being buried alive and sometimes gets panic attacks... And now Daryl knows about the panic attacks and the nightmares, but Beth doesn't know that he knows and no one else knows either... Hmm... I'm leaving it at that! :)
> 
> As usual, your comments mean a lot, so please do leave one! :)
> 
> Thank you for reading and supporting me! :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth gets some unwanted followers and shows the new her by confronting them. Meanwhile, Daryl realizes that he hasn't been very subtle about his feelings for the blonde as he thought he was and forces himself to act when he learns about someone in the group making eyes at the girl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeey people! I'm back with another chapter of "Blink" (because the title is too damn long and I don't feel like writing it every time I refer to this story ^^)! I am working my butt off in school, but I just HAD to finish this chapter. I honestly wasn't planning on posting it until, like, Sunday or something, but then I got some lovely messages on tumblr from "hookandemmaforever" that honestly just made me so happy that I had to post! I'm a bit sick too, so it really worked as a pick-me-up and I wanted to say, that since I don't know where hookandemmaforever's sister (who the message was about) reads this story (here or on fanfiction), I'm gonna make a shout out to them both! So: SPECIAL THANK YOU TO THE BOTH OF YOU FOR MAKING MY DAY! *MASSIVE HUGS*
> 
> And a thank you to all the others who are following this story and keep reviewing! You guys mean everything to me! :)
> 
> Now, without prolonging this note... Please enjoy the next chapter of "Blink"! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 9

"He's doing it again," Noah said quietly as he dug into the dirt in the backyard. Beth glanced up at him, huffing as she pushed away some hair that had fallen into her eyes.

"It's creepy, Noah," she told him, her voice just as low as his to make sure that Father Gabriel didn't hear her. "This last week he has kept turning up everywhere I go. He's there at, like, every corner I walk around... He just stares at me and it's starting to bother me."

Noah hummed in agreement, looking up at the priest who was situated on the stairs that led to the backyard as he watched Noah and Beth dig out the potatoes that Morgan had planted.

Beth and Morgan had found some potato seeds on one of their runs and tried planting them. They had all but forgotten about them until the day before when Carl had joked about missing french fries and Beth had remembered them. Morgan had then put Beth and Noah on the task of digging them out while Carol, Rick, Michonne and he went on a run together to the smaller convenient store where they had originally found the seeds in hope of finding more. Baby Judith was thus being watched by Maggie and Tara who were happy to have a day off from working around the house, while Sasha and Rosita were watching the perimeter with the men, who were chopping wood.

"He's smiling now too," Noah pointed out, causing Beth to groan.

"I swear to God, if he keeps doin' it I'm going to punch him," she complained.

"Maybe you should ask him what he fins so interesting about you?" Noah suggested. "In a nice tone, of course," he added when he saw the murderous look that Beth was sure she was sending his way.

" _Fine_ ," she said, standing up from where she was kneeling on the ground. She brushed the dirt off her hands against her pants that needed washing anyway and stalked over to Father Gabriel who looked up at her, immediately beaming. "May I help you with something, _Sir?_ " Beth asked through gritted teeth. The man had been getting on her last nerve during the week that had passed.

So far, Beth had been getting along with everyone who had joined her and Morgan on the farm. She didn't interact very much with Abraham, who was always working around the farm or hanging around Rosita, but he seemed like a good enough man to her so she didn't really have a problem with his drawn back behavior. Either way, Tara had explained to Beth what Abraham had gone through and that neither he, nor Rosita, Eugene, Tara herself of Father Gabriel had actually known Beth before her untimely death. Beth got along fine with Rosita too though, but Eugene seemed to be a little odd to her. She wasn't sure why she felt that way, but she didn't exactly feel like trying to get to know the fake scientist. He too, just like Father Gabriel, sometimes looked her way in a strange way, but Beth was certain that Eugene simply wasn't good at interacting with people. She had told Tara once when the two of them had been alone in Beth's room that she might have been more open to getting to know him if she hadn't caught him staring at her ass while she had bent over to pick up a fork she had dropped during breakfast.

Then there was Father Gabriel, who was currently _beaming_ up at her from where he sat. Beth tapped her foot against the ground and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well?" she asked again and the priest only shook his head.

"Just a wonderful day, is all," he said, his eyes twinkling strangely.

"If it's such a wonderful day, why don't you either help me and Noah, or go and help the other men with the wood?" Beth asked, frowning down at the man. All of the sudden, Father Gabriel stood up, towering over Beth who was forced to take step back when she realized how close he had gotten to her. She stared at him as he continued smiling, but then he must have noticed something off with her face because he frowned at her.

"Are you scared of me, Child?" he wondered, sounding as if the mere idea of Beth being scared by him frustrated him.

"I'm not scared," Beth hissed, not being able to help herself, "and I'm not a _child_!"

The reverend only chuckled then, "You're so young..."

"I'm nineteen," Beth said. " _At least_ , considering that no one is really keeping track of the days anymore."

"Still, you're very young," Father Gabriel said.

"And you should stop saying that and instead come out and say what you really wanna say," Beth told him.

"Beth..." She felt Noah's hand come to rest on her shoulder, but Beth shrugged him off while narrowing her eyes at Father Gabriel.

"You don't know how much you mean to me," the pastor said and this time, even Noah tensed beside her.

"According to the information I've gotten, you didn't even know me before," Beth frowned. "How the hell can I mean anythin' to you?"

"It's what you _stand for,_ Beth," Father Gabriel said, taking a step closer as he grabbed both of her arms. Beth froze as she stared at the man who continued to smile. "I was a man of God when this all began. I had devoted my life to learning the way of the Lord and these last few months, I had begun giving up on a miracle ever happening... Then we found _you_!" he laughed.

Beth pushed him back from herself, perhaps a bit more forcefully than necessary, but Father Gabriel didn't seem like he had even noticed. "You're my miracle, Beth!"

Beth stared at him and her mouth fell open. What was she supposed to say to that? The man had clearly lost his mind or something but Beth wasn't sure that there was anything she could do about it. She looked over at Noah, who seemed just as disturbed as her.

"Uh, Father Gabriel," he began hesitantly, "maybe it would do you some good to go and rest a bit?"

Father Gabriel was breathing a little heavier than before, still looking at Beth as if she had just showed him the moon for the first time, but he nodded. "Yeah, I think I'm going to rest," he mumbled, his eyes finally moving away from Beth. He walked inside without another word and Beth only stared after him before turning back to Noah.

"Please tell me that you're just as freaked out as I am," she pleaded and Noah nodded.

"I've never seen him like that," Noah said thoughtfully. "He was always a little weird, but he had toned down on the prayers and all that these past few months. Maybe he's just confused and tired? I mean, you being alive after..." Noah cleared his throat. "It is kind of a miracle that you're alive, so maybe it pushed him to believe in God again?"

"He can believe in whatever the hell he wants, as long as he doesn't get in my space again," Beth said. "I haven't felt that uncomfortable in a while and even though I don't think he means me any harm, I don't want him near me when I'm alone. He's weird."

Noah chuckled at that. "Maybe you should tell Rick or someone about this? If he's really making you uncomfortable, I'm sure Rick will be able to tell him to tone it down a bit."

"He needs to turn it off _entirely_ ," Beth said. "Or else I'm not gonna be held responsible for punching him."

"Come on, Beth," Noah said, but Beth shook her head,

"If he's losing it, he's a liability for us all, Noah," she frowned. "What if he cracks or something and takes someone else with him when he falls? I'm not going to allow anyone to get hurt."

"We can watch out for ourselves, just as you can take care of yourself," Noah reminded her, but it didn't make Beth feel any better.

"Fine," she said, deciding to let it go for now. "Let's get those potatoes before Carol and the others come back. We can start dinner earlier."

Noah groaned, but agreed to help, nonetheless.

* * *

"I swear that Rick Grimes is just gonna keep findin' work for us to do while he goes off looking for seeds," Abraham complained as he swung his ax down on the log. "Didn't you guys tell me he turned into a farmer once?"

"Stop complainin' already," Daryl muttered, changing places with Tyreese who had been keeping watch with Sasha and Rosita until now, not really wanting to remember the peace that they had temporarily felt at the prison. It usually led him to thinking about the day the Governor showed up, Hershel's death and then his time alone with Beth, which he _really_ didn't want to think about anymore.

"Hey, it's my time to switch," Abraham grinned, but didn't move from his spot. Tyreese took Daryl's place as Daryl walked over to Carl, who offered him a bottle of water. Daryl ruffled his hair and the kid chuckled, making Daryl smirk in turn before he drank a bit of the water.

They had been working on getting more firewood stacked up, preparing for the winter when they probably wouldn't be able to go out as often as before. Morgan had talked to them about building a small shed in the backyard where they would be able to stock more wood or at least store meat they could smoke before it began snowing.

During the days that had passed he had buried himself in work around the farm, once again managing to stay away from Beth. The girl, however, hadn't tried to seek him out as she had before. Instead, she seemed to have accepted the fact that he needed more time to deal. With what, even he didn't know, but he was certain that Beth would never pressure him to get closer to her until he was sure he was ready.

Daryl's main problem was still dealing with the guilt he felt for the girl's fate. He knew that it weighed down on everyone in his group and family, but somehow they had all managed to push it down and away after they had realized that Beth was still very much alive. Daryl, however, was still plagued by the nightmares he had been having for over seven months and the images of Beth's pale face before he had closed the casket he had found her, moments before he had been the first to shovel dirt on top of it after lowering it into the hole he had dug. Every single time that he saw her, he didn't know whether he wanted to just disappear into thin air, or if he wanted to embrace her and never let her go.

Not only was it mentally conflicting, but Daryl sometimes found that it actually hurt him _physically_ as well. His heart felt as if it would implode on itself at times, while at others, it felt as if his chest was being torn wide open. There was no other way to explain it and Daryl had hoped that he would be able to distract himself by working around the house. Thus, unlike Abraham, he was rather grateful for the work that Rick appointed them.

"Yeah, Rick was a farmer all right," Sasha confirmed, "and a pretty good one at that. Or well, as good as an amateur can get after the world has gone to hell."

Abraham snorted, "How long does he really think this place will be safe for us? I don't mind havin' runnin' water and all, but we should start considerin' the possibility of a heard finding us."

"The lack of walkers in this area is weird," Rosita pointed out. "I mentioned it to Beth a while ago when we were checking the pits. The only walkers that have stumbled this way were the once that attacked Daryl and Beth in the woods."

"I'm tellin' ya, it's suspicious," Abraham said.

"Stop being so pessimistic, Abe," Sasha rolled her eyes. "Things are good for now and the defense system we've built will warn us in time to get away from the farm if something _were_ to happen."

" _What_ defense system?" Abraham snorted. "We've dug some pits, fixed some fences and built a wall... That ain't gonna keep a bigger heard out!"

"An' you're gonna bring one down on us unless ya _shut the fuck up_ ," Daryl hissed at him. Abraham kicked the dirt by his feet and walked up to Daryl, shoving the ax into his hands.

"My turn for a break," he muttered, sitting down on the ground next to Carl without another word.

Daryl shook his head and looked at Carl who seemed to be a little annoyed as well, but the boy didn't say anything. Instead, he handed Abraham his bottle of water and looked back at Daryl with a shrug.

"We gotta stick together," Daryl said in a low voice. "If Rick thinks stayin' on this farm is the best thing for us, we're stayin' on the farm. I for sure ain't gonna leave unless _everyone_ decides it's the best thing to do."

Daryl went back to chopping firewood once he had spoken his mind, deciding that it wasn't worth getting into an argument with Abraham over something that wasn't important at the moment.

"You just don't wanna leave Blondie behind," Abraham snorted, making Daryl pause in his movements.

He knew it was true, although he hadn't known that he was being _that_ obvious about it. His cheeks got a bit warmer, but he kept his head down so that no one would see that he was actually blushing.

' _Fuckin' pussy...'_ Merle's voice broke into his mind. ' _Blushin' like a fuckin' virgin, are ya? Da' woulda had a field day with this!'_

It wasn't worth commenting on, he thought, willing his brother's voice away as well as the embarrassment he had felt. There was nothing to be ashamed of, was there? The entire part of their group that had known Beth had felt the loss of the blonde; it wasn't just Daryl who had been in mourning. There was no reason for him to be embarrassed about not wanting to leave Beth behind again.

"Well, I'm not leaving unless Beth is leaving either," Sasha said, shooting a glare at Abraham. Daryl glanced up at the young woman who met his eyes before offering him a barely visible nod that he didn't return. Although, he was sure that she could see the gratitude in his eyes over the fact that she had stood up for him, proving that they actually were a part of the same family.

"Point still stands," Abraham said, but Daryl yet again decided that it was better not to encourage an argument. Instead, he continued chopping wood.

* * *

Later that evening Beth sat in her room, doodling on one of the pages of her journal. They had all eaten dinner together, the potatoes being a happy surprise for everyone in the group. Beth and Noah had used some of the spices that they had had in the kitchen, and while it may not have been a gourmet dinner, everyone had appreciated the taste of the stew that hadn't actually been horrible. They had used up the meat from the rabbits that Daryl had caught and Carol had made sure to tell Daryl that he would probably need to go hunting again soon. The man had just grunted in reply while he hurriedly ate his portion of stew but Beth could have sworn that he had glanced her way when Carol had spoken to him about it.

The trip to the store had been a success too since Rick, Carol, Michonne and Morgan had brought back every type of vegetable seed they had been able to find which they would probably do an inventory of in the next couple of days, as well as plan out where it would be best to plant some of them. However, since winter was approaching, they wouldn't be able to plant all of them and Carl had shared that his father probably remembered some of the things he had learned about farming since the Turn started.

Father Gabriel hadn't been present at dinner, which Beth was thankful for. Instead, the man had been holed up in his room, reading passages from his Bible that he apparently hadn't looked at for months. Beth realized that her relief at not having the strange reverend at dinner must have shown on her face when Tara had mentioned that father Gabriel wouldn't be joining them because of the way Morgan had looked at her. Her sister as well seemed to have picked up on Beth's attitude toward the pastor, but said nothing.

When they had all eaten, Beth had excused herself and gone to her room for some privacy. Father Gabriel apparently wasn't the only man in the house who was acting strange around her. The entire time during dinner, Beth had felt the fake scientist's eyes on her, sneaking glances when he thought that no one was looking. The attention was strange to Beth and she couldn't help but try and remember what Tara had told her about Eugene.

She hadn't known the man before she had been shot, so there was no reason for him to be looking at her the way he was. Or at least Beth didn't think there was. She was certain that she wouldn't even have noticed the attention before, but during the seven months that she had been alone with Morgan, she had picked up on minding her surroundings and always being on alert. Sometimes, she wondered whether it had been something she had always done, but then she figured that considering the fact that she had gotten _shot_ and had been presumed dead by her family, she must not have been very mindful of things around her.

Not that she knew exactly _how_ she had gotten shot, since she hadn't asked anyone about it. She wasn't sure that she was ready to find out, nor if she ever would be, and she figured that the people in her group wouldn't be very willing to tell the story either.

So no; it didn't make sense to her that Eugene would suddenly start paying so much attention to her. Although, she presumed that he might have been doing so all along, and she simply hadn't noticed because she had been so busy with trying to figure out Daryl, who had only looked at her _once_ during dinner.

Not that she was counting or anything.

A knock sounded against her door and Beth looked up. "Who is it?" she called out.

"Maggie," her sister replied. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah," Beth drawled her own answer and Maggie didn't wait a second to open the door. She stepped inside and then closed the door after herself before walking over to Beth's bed.

"You're writing?" Maggie wondered with a quirked eyebrow.

"Mhm..." Beth hummed, putting the journal away. "You don't look very surprised by that," she then pointed out.

"You used to write all the time," Maggie said. "Mind if I sit?"

"Would you like to maybe lay down?" Beth countered, watching as another small smile appeared on her sister's face. Maggie motioned for Beth to move over and then lowered herself on the bed. Beth leaned back and laid down next to her sister as they both stared up at the ceiling in silence.

"You gonna tell me what that look was all about at dinner?" Maggie asked after a while.

"It was nothin'," Beth said. "Father Gabriel was just acting weird today and I was kinda glad that he wasn't at dinner..."

"Did he do something to you?"

Beth could literally _hear_ the frown in Maggie's tone. She sighed, "No, he was just weird. Started rambling on and on about me being alive was some kind of sign from God that things were going to get better. Made me uncomfortable."

"You being alive sure is a miracle, Beth," Maggie said solemnly. "Though I doubt it has anything to do with God..."

Beth shifted, turning on her side so that she could look at her sister. "Do you still believe in God? Have you ever believed in him?"she wondered. Maggie remained silent, but Beth saw something close to pain pass over the brunette's face. "Sorry," Beth said. "I shouldn't have asked."

"No, it's okay," Maggie said quietly. "I was just thinking... On whether I still believe or not."

"Morgan once told me that it was important for me to hold onto faith," Beth told her. "Maybe that, him pushing me to hold onto something, is what kept me alive all this time for us to be reunited?" She fiddled with the cross that still hung from her wrist, covering the scar there.

"Maybe," Maggie agreed. "You and Morgan though... He cares about you."

"I care about him too," Beth said. She was aware that Maggie and Morgan had clashed a few times since Rick and the others came to the farm and she could understand that her sister was having a difficult time adjusting to her being different.

"I've noticed," Maggie said calmly. "You two took care of each other for months, lived together and survived together."

"Not necessarily in that order though," Beth tried to joke.

"Maybe you even loved each other..." Maggie mumbled absentmindedly. Beth froze for a second, looking at her sister who still seemed lost in thought. Was she still talking about Beth and Morgan? Yes, she loved Morgan like a father, but for some reason, it felt like Maggie's mind had traveled to another place entirely.

"I do love Morgan," Beth told her, trying to get her attention again. "He loves me too."

"Like a daughter, right?" Maggie asked for confirmation, looking back at Beth.

Beth's fingers moved over her bracelet.

Of course Morgan only loved her as a daughter, but could she really say that to Maggie without potentially hurting her? Beth knew that Maggie still remembered their real parents, even though Beth's memory of them had been wiped clean. Would it hurt Maggie to know that Beth saw Morgan as a father and that he was the only fatherly figure that she could ever remember having in her life?

"Yeah," Beth finally said, turning to lay down on her back again.

"I understood as much," Maggie said. "You don't have anything to feel guilty about, Beth. I'm not judging you because I suppose it's perfectly normal for him to feel that way about you and for you to actually feel like you're his daughter too." Beth didn't say anything, but she was grateful for Maggie's understanding. Her sister seemed to sense that that particular conversation was over, so she changed the subject, "Is something else bothering you? Something that I might need to know about?"

_Daryl_ , Beth thought to herself, but instead, she said, "Eugene."

"What about Eugene?" Maggie asked.

"He was looking at me strangely during dinner," Beth admitted. "Why am I just now noticing the weird looks everyone keep sending me?"

"Not everyone looks at you weirdly," Maggie chuckled.

"Yeah, okay," Beth snorted. "Maybe it's just the priest and the scientist then."

"Eugene is harmless," Maggie insisted. "I've known him a little bit longer than I've known Gabriel, but I'm sure that he's just awkward around you because you're pretty." Maggie nudged her side and Beth felt her cheeks get warm.

"Shut up," she nudged Maggie back. "I have scars all over my face and I'm suffering from both memory loss and voice control issues. Don't see what's attractive about that."

"Don't," Maggie said, looking over at her. "You're absolutely stunning, Beth. Scars and all. You survived everything this awful world threw at you and that makes you even a thousand times more beautiful. If Eugene, or any guy really, likes you, it's because you deserve to be liked. Hell, I don't think anyone has ever been able to _dislike_ you!"

That certainly didn't make Beth blush any less, but she took the compliment (It was a compliment, right?) nonetheless. The small knowledge Maggie had shared about Beth's life before her accident, made Beth a bit more curious though. She recalled wondering about the man she had shared the candle lit dinner with and that bubbly feeling she had felt when she had gotten a small flash of the memory.

"Did I ever have a boyfriend?" Beth blurted out before she could stop herself. When Maggie tensed a bit by her side, Beth felt herself blushing even more furiously. She was glad that the small light that she had in her room wasn't burning too bright, because it would have made her awkwardness known even more.

"Yeah, you did," Maggie finally said. "Two since this all started, but I don't think it was very serious... You were just sixteen when you were with the first one, close to eighteen with the second."

"They're dead," Beth said, knowing there was no question about it. Maggie nodded and Beth sighed, "Am I awful for saying that I'm happy that I don't remember them dying? I wish I could remember the good things about them, but knowing that I might have seen them die..."

"You didn't see them die," Maggie told her. "You weren't there when they died, but I know that you were sad about it afterward."

"What were their names?" Beth asked, relieved that they could talk about it without being awkward. She supposed that this was the way sisters were supposed to behave around each other. They were supposed to lay in bed together, talking about boys and laughing about things that they recalled doing when they were younger.

Except they were talking about boys that were dead now, and Beth couldn't remember where she had been seven months ago, much less what she had or hadn't done when she had been younger.

"Jimmy," Maggie said, "and Zach."

Beth tried to think about the names, wanting to remember at least something about them, but her mind was completely emptied.

"They were nice kids," Maggie said. "They were both good to you."

"Yeah?"

"Mhm..." Maggie hummed, a small smile appearing on her face. "I would tell you something, but I really don't want to freak you out," she admitted.

"What?" Beth frowned, but Maggie only smiled at her. "Maggie!" Beth exclaimed, giggling a bit herself. "Tell me, please?"

"It's kind of inappropriate," Maggie told her and Beth immediately froze.

Inappropriate? Was Maggie talking about...?

"Is it about sex?" Beth asked bluntly and Maggie's eyes widened a little.

"I think this is the first time you've said the word 'sex' without blushing when talking to me," Maggie mused, that bemused grin once again spreading across her face.

"So it is about sex then," Beth concluded. "What? Are you gonna tell me that I'm still a virgin, despite having had two boyfriends since the apocalypse started?"

"Quite the opposite, actually," Maggie said, watching Beth almost nervously, as if waiting for her to react.

Beth raised an eyebrow. "Great," she said. "So apparently, I'm _not_ a virgin, but I can't remember having sex or what it even feels like, which kind of _does_ make me a virgin... At least mentally."

Maggie pursed her lips, clearly not knowing how to react to Beth's statement, but when Beth grinned at her sister, Maggie let out a low chuckle herself.

"Yeah, yeah, keep laughing," Beth said, nudging Maggie again. "Will you at least tell me who it was?"

"Zach," Maggie told her. "You were very nervous about it and came to talk to me beforehand. It was very sweet actually." Maggie's eyes twinkled a bit, it seemed. "You're different compared to how you were back then."

"Oh?" Beth watched her, leaving her unspoken question hang.

"I loved you before, Beth and I still love you now," Maggie told her confidently. "No matter how much you may have changed, you're still my sister and you've grown into such a wonderful young woman that-" Maggie's voice broke and she shook her head, sitting up on the bed before wiping her tears away. Beth sat up instantly, embracing her sister from behind on pure instinct. "I'm just so proud of you," Maggie said, her voice still thick with tears as she took a hold of Beth's hands that were clasped in front of her. She pressed a light kiss to Beth's hands and hung her head as she cried silently. "I love you, Beth," she said and Beth only held her tighter.

"I love you too, Maggie," Beth mumbled into her shoulder, realizing quickly that that was one thing she was a hundred percent sure of.

* * *

The next day, Daryl stood by his motorcycle, cleaning it while the others around him relaxed on the porch. Rick was sitting with Judith in his lap, playing with the little girl, allowing her to stand from time to time so that she could practice walking. Carl, Michonne, Noah and Carol were playing cards together, since they had found a couple of decks down in a box in the basement. Abraham had suggested that they all play poker later to make the time pass since Rick had given them all a day off.

Daryl didn't mind the fact that they had all given Rick the power of having the last word. He knew that deep down Rick himself didn't necessarily _want_ that power, or the responsibility of being the leader, but the reason that they had given it to him was because they all trusted him. Another thing Daryl was aware of though, was that Rick would never actually abuse that power and before he made his decisions, he would always ask the people who had been in the prison council before they had lost their home there.

The others in the group hadn't objected to Rick's leadership either, no one except Michonne. Although, technically, Michonne hadn't really questioned his leadership role as much as pointed out that he was looking for the wrong thing. During an argument between the two of them, Michonne had told Rick that he was looking for ways for them all to survive, but that he was forgetting that they also needed to _live_. Daryl had at the time not been much for living but he hadn't been much for surviving either. He had only kept going for the sake of the group, because he knew that for some reason, they would not be able to handle losing him too so soon after Beth. He had pushed through and protected the people in the group the best he could, despite distancing himself from them. When he thought back to the way he had been, he had barely recognized himself. He had been in such a vulnerable state and he had actually _allowed_ people to see him break down, something that he would never normally have allowed.

The comments that Abraham had shot at him the day before had been based in the other man's own observations. It wasn't a secret how hard Daryl had taken the loss of Beth, but he had gotten used to no one actually mentioning it anymore, so he had definitely not been expecting Abraham to use it in such an argumentative context. Daryl was tired of always being protective and on the offense, so he had let Abraham's snide remarks slide, deciding to be the better man who didn't get into petty arguments that wouldn't lead anywhere. The feelings he may or may not have for Beth were his own and no one else needed to know about them and he had no intention of making a spectacle out of them just because Abraham was in one of his moods.

"I can't believe I lost again! You're probably cheating," Carl accused Michonne who only chuckled before putting down her cards, shuffling them together with the rest of the deck.

"You have to learn how to play properly if you're gonna play with us later," Michonne said. "That means you gotta learn how to spot the _real_ cheaters."

"So you are cheating?" Carl frowned, looking at Noah and Carol for help, but the two of them only snickered and shrugged.

"Try to make out when I am and when I'm not," Michonne told him cryptically, making Daryl snort loudly. Michonne looked over at him and smirked back, tipping her head forward a little before dealing the cards again.

After another game was played between the smaller group when Carl finally decided that there was no point in playing with them because they had all ganged up against him. Instead, the kid walked over to Daryl and asked if he could help him clean the bike. Daryl threw a rag at him in reply and Carl immediately picked up on working on it.

"I ain't ever gonna play poker with you guys," Carl muttered. "Though, I'll be rooting for you, Daryl. I bet ya can kick _Michonne's_ ass at it!" he said loudly so that Michonne would hear him, but the woman didn't even raise her head from the cards in her hands.

"Daryl might _wish_ that he can beat me," she said, switching the cards around in her hands, "but there's no way he's gonna do it."

"We'll see 'bout that," Daryl replied calmly, sending a wink at Carl who grinned back.

"Who's gonna be making dinner today?" Carl then asked, looking around them all.

"Maggie offered to cook," Rick replied, holding Judith up as the toddler gurgled happily. "She and Glenn are in the kitchen."

"They're gonna burn dinner," Daryl pointed out.

"At least then we'll have a laugh," Carol shrugged before looking around. "Where's everyone else?"

"Gabe's in his room, reading," Carl said. "I think Abraham, Rosita, Sasha, Ty and Tara went on a walk with Morgan who wanted to show them around now that they had some free time... Uh... Beth's probably in the backyard practicin' with her knives or somethin'..."

"Eugene?" Carol frowned.

"Still creeping on Beth, I'm guessing," Carl shrugged.

Daryl paused, turning sharply to look at the kid. "What?" he frowned, looking up at Carol too who was looking equally confused.

"Yeah," Carl said. "Haven't you guys noticed how he's always looking at her from afar?"

Daryl's brows knitted together even more, if possible. "No..."

Then he thought back to the last couple of days and remembered that one time that he had looked over at Beth and seen her hurry inside, but not before shooting something similar to a glare behind her at someone. When Daryl had looked in the direction she had, he had seen the scientist looking a bit dazed while Tara was trying to explain something to him.

"He's not doin' anythin' to her, is he?" Daryl all but growled, feeling anger bubble inside of him.

"Nah," Carl shook his head. "He just looks at her... It's weird, but Eugene is weird... And harmless, right?"

Daryl wanted to tell Carl that no man was to be trusted around someone as beautiful as Beth, but he wasn't sure that he could say it without having anyone misinterpret (or completely interpret it correctly) what he was saying.

"You know," Noah said, "Abe told me something that was a bit weird once... Remember when we found that crate of wine in that motel we stayed at for a few days?"

Daryl remembered it all right. Glenn and Tyreese had found a box of red wine and some of them had been a little too happy to drink it. Once Judith had been put to bed, everyone else had pretty much gone to rest too, although Abraham, Rosita, Noah, Tyreese and Sasha had stayed awake for a while longer. Daryl had isolated himself and kept watch instead, because of reasons they all knew, but never spoke of.

"Yeah, I remember," Daryl said, turning his attention to the younger man. "What did he tell ya?" Noah looked at Carl briefly, as if he wasn't sure he should say something in front of him. "Will ya just spit it out, Noah?"

"Well... It's really awkward actually... I guess, Eugene kind of had a thing for watching Abe and Rosita... Ya know..." Noah fumbled with the words. Carllet out a tiny snicker and then quickly covered his mouth, looking over at Daryl and then his father who gave him a disapproving look.

Daryl narrowed his eyes, "What do ya mean, ' _ya know_ '?"

"You know," Noah drawled, waving his hand in the air a bit even though they all knew that Daryl had gotten it the first time around.

' _Ya lettin' that perve near Blondie, eh?'_

Fuck.

Without thinking, Daryl dropped his rag onto the bike, telling Carl to keep up the cleaning. He met Rick's eyes briefly, and his friend shot him a worried look before nodding curtly, knowing that Daryl wouldn't actually do anything to hurt Eugene...unless the man had done something to Beth that is.

He stormed into the house and headed for the back door, knowing it was closer, passing Maggie and Glenn in the kitchen who were laughing at something, not even noticing him. Even if Beth wasn't actively seeking out him anymore, he quickly realized that this was the first time that he was approaching her all on his own.

For some reason he wondered, whether that might have been Beth's purpose with staying away all along, almost as if she had known that he wouldn't be able to keep away from her for too long.

* * *

Beth threw the knife and missed the target by an inch as the knife embedded itself in the tree. She glared at it as if it had somehow personally offended her and flexed her fingers before reaching for another knife in her belt. Stopping for a mere second, she sensed him behind her and almost groaned. She knew that Maggie had told her that Eugene was harmless and Beth was sure that the man actually didn't want to scare her or anything, but he was making her uncomfortable with all the looks he kept sending her way.

Why did she suddenly start noticing the unwanted attention she got from both Father Gabriel and Eugene? She had asked herself this several times she began seeing the change in their behavior toward her.

"Are you just going to stand there in the shadows or are you actually going to talk to me sometime?" Beth asked out loud, twisting her body as she threw the knife in Eugene's direction. It dug into the house wall, a few inches away from Eugene's face that was covered in shock, his eyes wide as he stared at her in something that looked like a mix of fright and awe.

She was tired of being quiet around them and since she had already lost it once with Father Gabriel, she figured she might as well confront Eugene too. Although, now that she saw how scared he actually looked, she wondered whether that had been a mistake.

"Sorry," she grinned sheepishly. "Couldn't help myself."

"S'okay," Eugene said, removing the knife from the wall before walking toward her. Beth waited for him to approach, not wanting to scare him away. When he stood close enough, he offered her the knife and she took it with a small smile.

"Thanks," she said, waiting for him to say something, but he just stared. After a moment, it was starting to get both uncomfortable and annoying and Beth suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. "Was there anythin' you wanted to say?" she asked.

A small blush spread across Eugene's cheeks and he looked down at the ground, shifting from one foot to the other. He mumbled something incoherently and Beth leaned a bit closer. "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you."

Eugene's head suddenly snapped up and Beth was forced to take a step back, having completely missed how close they were standing. She felt as if her personal space had been invaded as Eugene looked at her.

"I just wanted to say that you're really pretty," he said, blushing even more furiously.

Beth's mouth dropped open; she had not been expecting that. "Uh, thank you, I guess?" she replied, although it came out as more of a question. She was flattered that Eugene found her attractive, but truth was, she didn't see him that way. Of course, she might be reading too much into it and maybe he just found her pretty, but wasn't interested in her in that way... Although, they were living in a time that could be considered the end of the World, and there weren't many options out there...

"I'm sorry if I've made ya uncomfortable," Eugene said. "I just think that honesty is the best way to go around these days..."

Beth didn't say anything, instead she just took another small step back before turning around and putting her knives back in their case. She would have to clean them later.

"I know they've probably told ya that I lied about havin' a cure," Eugene said. "I've done my best to make up for my past mistakes." Beth nodded silently, but didn't look up at him. "I hope you're not gonna judge me based on my past."

"I'm not in the right position to judge anyone about their past when I can't even remember it," Beth told him, turning around again to face him. "From what I understand, you and I have never met before, which means that I won't be judging you. I would however appreciate it if you stopped following me around and watching me. No offense, but it's kinda creepy."

Eugene nodded and offered her a small smile, "Sorry. I'm not really good with communicating with people."

"I got it," Beth said. "Just... Don't do it again, okay?" He nodded again and Beth grabbed her knife case. "Good, I'm gonna go put these away and you should go check what the others are up to–" Beth let out a small gasp as she turned around and connected with a solid chest. The man she had walked right into softly grabbed her elbows to steady her as her knife case fell to the ground. She blinked a couple of times and looked up, staring with wide eyes into pools of blue.

"Daryl..." she whispered, without actually meaning to and the storm that seemed to be raging in his eyes seemed to calm a bit as he focused on her. There was a sudden tightness in her chest that she didn't understand but before she had the chance to even start comprehending why her body was reacting the way it was in the proximity of the hunter, his gaze had moved away from hers and his face had hardened.

"He botherin' ya?" Daryl asked, not looking down at her, but he hadn't really let go of her elbows either. She was still close to him, her hands clutching his shirt as she turned her head and glanced at Eugene who seemed to have paled a bit.

"We were just talkin'," Beth told the man that still seemed intent to shoot arrows at Eugene with his eyes. "Everythin' is fine. You startled me," she said, earning his attention back immediately. For a second, his thumb moved across the skin of her arm before he seemed to realize what he was doing, and he abruptly let go of her. Beth stumbled back a bit, breathing out and looked at Daryl, determined to look unfazed, despite her heart hammering wildly in her chest.

"Ya better run off, Eugene," Daryl told the other man. "I ever hear that ya've been followin' her 'round again, you're gonna have to deal with me."

Beth looked back at Eugene, who nodded wildly and then hurried inside through the door that was still open. She realized that Daryl must have come through the back door, but she had been too distracted to actually hear him coming. Once again, she faced Daryl, who was looking like he regretted ever having said anything.

The way he had spoken to Eugene, the fierceness in his tone... That wasn't the way someone spoke when they protected someone they hadn't been close to before. His action and his tone only proved to Beth even more that there was something that Daryl was keeping from her and it made her a thousand times more curious about the man.

"Thank you," Beth decided to say.

"I didn't do anythin'," Daryl muttered, causing Beth to narrow her eyes a bit.

"You were looking out for me," she pointed out. "I had it under control, but you did anyway. That's what I'm thanking you for."

He wasn't looking away from her, which Beth saw as a positive thing. Maybe he was finally ready to start letting her in a bit more?

"I guess I was," he finally said, but it was so low that she had barely heard him. "Lookin' out for ya, even if ya were doin' fine without me..." he trailed off and Beth took a small step forward.

"Though, isn't it a bit strange?" she asked, gathering her courage for what she was going to say.

"What?" Daryl frowned down at her.

Beth inhaled and looked at him, "That you're looking out for me, even though you told me that we weren't close before? I don't see why you would bother protecting someone you never knew very well, if you know that they can protect themselves."

Daryl only looked at her with a blank face, blinking a few times. "Yeah," he finally drawled. "That is strange," he agreed. His eyes met hers one final time before he turned around and started walking toward the door again; away from Beth.

"You are a strange man, Mr. Dixon!" Beth called after him, not being able to help herself. She watched as Daryl faltered on one of the steps, grabbing the railing so that he wouldn't actually fall. Slowly, he turned around and looked at her, a curious look on his face. For a moment, he looked as if he was going to say something to her, but he shook his head at himself and walked inside instead.

Beth looked after him, breathing out through her nose to calm her nerves a bit. The man was infuriating and _clearly_ an expert at leaving Beth both confused and curious to know more about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Beth... Always being followed around by strange people... Although, Eugene isn't as strange as Father Gabriel (who is clearly losing it a bit, don't ya think?)... Don't be mad at Eugene though! He's just awkward but I promise that he won't be following Beth around any more! Especially not after the death glare he got from a certain hunter...
> 
> Oh, and Abraham is a bit rough around the edges, isn't he? I have some plans for him as well... Trust me on this! ;)
> 
> Maggie and Beth sisterly bonding! And Maggie telling Beth about her past boyfriends and *cough* informing her of the fact that Beth ISN'T a virgin. If some of you don't agree, I'm just gonna explain it by saying that ever since I saw Beth kiss Zach in 4x01, I couldn't help but feel like she "certainly knew how to kiss" (as I think Daryl might have reflected on in some earlier chapters...). Either way, I also read on the TWD wikia that Hershel once mentioned having to chase Beth around on the farm while she was with Jimmy to keep her from "doing stuff" and thus, I decided, that at least in this story, Beth Greene isn't a virgin. Hope you can accept that! :)
> 
> Either way, it would make me very happy to know what you thought about the chapter since it took me AGES to put it up. Google chrome crashed on my computer and I was forced to use Internet Explorer *shudder* (no offense to anyone who uses IE, I just prefer chrome!).
> 
> Once again, thank you for the massive support! Leave a comment and I'll try to finish chapter 10 (which is a favorite of mine because of reasons!) sooner! :)
> 
> Have a nice weekend everyone! xx


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl has a lot of things on his mind and comes to term with a few things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the love I've gotten so far on this story! It has already passed 160 reviews on fanfiction and I honestly couldn't be happier! The comments here on AO3 are also wonderful and always manage to make me smile, so thank you for all the support so far! The support is the main reason that I managed to finish this chapter so quickly, and I gotta say, I have chapter 11 ready too, so depending on the amount of comments, I might post it this Sunday! ;)
> 
> As you all know, this one is one of my favorites, mainly for the ending scene, so I really hope that you'll like it! Another favorite of mine is chapter 12, which is currently being written. I just wanted to get that out there! ;)
> 
> Now, please enjoy! :)
> 
> P.S. This is kind of a Daryl-centered chapter. There will be no POV changes here! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 10

_ He watched the little girl as she ran to the swing set in the garden, dark blonde curls bouncing around her shoulders as giggles filled the late fall air. Leaves, yellow and red, were falling slowly around them every time the wind picked up, caressing his cheeks with a cold that told him that winter was coming closer. _

“ _Daddy!” the little girl giggled as she tried to climb the swing; she couldn't be more than three or four years old, but she barely reached the swing because it had been swung around once so that it would be higher up from the ground._

_ Daryl watched her confusedly, looking around, trying to spot the person the little blonde was looking for. He realized that he was alone with her in the garden and the little girl frowned at him, patting the swing. _

“ _Help, Daddy!” she called again, this time with eyebrows knitted together and a small pout. Her blue eyes were a shade that he had only seen once before in his life and for a second, it took his breath away._

“ _Daryl? Why aren't you helping her?” someone said behind him and he stood frozen as the person walked past him. As the woman walked by him, she put her hand on his arm before moving to the little girl by the swing._

“ _Mommy!” the girl squealed, lifting her arms up as the woman lifted her up on the swing before zipping up the little girl's jacket better._

“ _There ya go,” the woman said softly, kissing the little girl on the forehead as she began pushing the swing. “Hold on tight, lil' Lady.”_

_ Daryl stared at the scene in front of him as the young woman looked up, her own blonde locks moving with the wind. She was smiling at him and he stood frozen as he began recognizing her features. There was a scar on her left cheek and another one above her right eyebrow, on her forehead. Daryl swallowed thickly as her blue eyes, irises colored the exact same cerulean as the little girl's, moved to meet his. _

“Beth _,” he breathed out, his feet moving of their own accord as he took a step toward her._

“ _What?” the slightly older version of Beth asked, a small grin on her face. “Why are ya starin' at me?” He stood there, just looking at her and the smile gracing her face turned into a small smile as she looked down at the little girl. “I think your Dad's havin' a meltdown, Sweetheart.”_

_ His skin felt as if it had suddenly been set ablaze. Had Beth just referred to  _ him _as that sweet little girl's father? The same little girl who had just called Beth her 'Mommy'? He couldn't believe what he was seeing._

_ It couldn't be real. _

_ He took a few more hesitant steps toward them before circling around the swing set to stand next to Beth. He looked at her from the side and she turned, looking right back at him. Once again, a smile spread across her lips. _

“ _What?” she repeated, bringing back memories of a night that she had asked him something similar over a white trash dinner in a funeral home._

“ _Mhm...” he mumbled, not knowing what to say. He wanted to reach out, touch that scar on her forehead, trace it with his thumb before moving to cup her cheek. He wanted to know whether it_ was _real. “Beth?” he whispered, his voice low and gravely as he finally lifted his hand, moving it toward her face._

“ _Yes, Daryl?” she asked, her lips parting as she continued to push the little girl on the swing._

“ _You...” he trailed off, knowing that his voice would break if he kept talking._

“ _What about me?” Beth pressed._

“ _You changed my mind,” he finally said, his index finger brushing against her cheek. Beth closed her eyes, a smile still on her face as she exhaled before opening her eyes to look at him again._

“ _Daryl, I–”_

Bang!

_ Coldness ran through him as he watched Beth's head snap back as her body fell to the ground. The little girl on the swing screamed a blood curling scream and Daryl moved quickly, grabbing her and pushing her to the ground as well, keeping them both low. He breathed heavily as his eyes fell on Beth, blood dripping from the young woman's mouth, eyes wide as she stared into nothingness. _

“ _Mommy!” the little girl struggled in his arms to get away; to get closer to Beth's lifeless body. Daryl felt tears pricking his eyes as he put his hand over the little girl's eyes._

“ _Don't look,” he told her. “Don't look at her... Don't look at Mommy.”_

_ As soon as he touched the little girl though, she faded out of his arms and he found himself on all fours on the ground, Beth's body still close by. _

“ _Little girl? Lil' Lady!” Daryl called out desperately, but he was alone yet again. He crawled over to Beth and gently touched her. His first tear fell on her face, sliding down to mix with the blood at the corner of her mouth. “No, Beth... Not again... Beth, please...” he repeated over and over again as he clutched her body to him, cradling her in his arms. “Beth, please don't leave me again,” he choked out, his shoulders shaking with his sobs. “_ _Just, d_ _on't leave me...”_

* * *

Daryl shot up in bed, his breath coming out in short pants. For a moment, he didn't recognize his surroundings, which put him on alert as he automatically reached for his crossbow that was by the foot of the bed. Then he remembered where he was, at the farmhouse, before sitting at the edge of the bed, rubbing his hands over his eyes.

It had all been a dream.

A dream that had begun so wonderfully and then ended in horror.

Running a hand through his hair, he turned back to look through the window, seeing that it was still dark outside. Once again, he buried his face in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned forward a bit, trying to catch his breath that was still a bit ragged.

His mind went back to the little girl, who had called him her father and Beth, who had looked so happy when he had finally found the words he had lost all those months ago. Finally, he had gathered the courage he needed to tell her that she was the one who had changed his mind about people. Though, maybe it wasn't really much about gathering courage rather than losing resolve. Something had always held him back and he had denied it to himself when he had first felt something different for the girl; when she had looked at him lazily, half-drunk (probably very drunk), telling him that they should burn down the moonshine shack and his past along with it.

And it had all been a dream.

Frustrated with himself, for conjuring up a future in his mind that would never be; a future he had never even known that he had wanted until he had dreamed it tonight, he laid back down on the bed. There was no use in getting up since it was still too dark outside to actually go on a hunt, but he knew that as soon as day broke, he would be out of the farmhouse and into the woods. He needed to clear his mind and he wouldn't be able to do so when Beth was always hanging around him.

Ever since that day in the backyard, when he had glared Eugene down for following Beth around, the blonde seemed to have interpreted it as if it was just fine for her to talk to him whenever she wanted, including when everyone was around them. Every single morning, Beth would say 'good morning' to him, sometimes even throwing in a 'Mr. Dixon' at the end with a teasing smirk. He would reply in a mumble, but she would keep coming up to him during the day to try and strike up conversations with him.

The first time it had happened, he had been so stunned that his mouth had actually opened to reply, but then he had choked on his own words and ended up looking like a fish. Rick and Michonne had been there at the time and the two of them had snickered at his dumbfounded expression, earning themselves a glare from him once Beth had walked away to talk to Morgan instead.

It had continued in that fashion for an entire week and he was fairly sure that she was coming up to him whenever he was around someone else on purpose, as if she wanted to show him that she didn't care what the others might think if the two of them actually had a decent conversation.

It bothered him.

It bothered him so, _so_ very much.

Not the fact that she was talking to him on a daily basis, but that he was never able to reply. He got angry with himself each and every time he failed to find words. It just didn't seem possible for him to figure out what to say to her when she casually mentioned something random to him. She would watch him for a moment, sigh when he didn't reply and then walk away before he could even open his mouth.

He _wanted_ to talk to her, but where was he even supposed to begin?

Not to mention the fact that he had half-expected her to get awkward around him after he had basically told Eugene to back off of her, even though she had told him that Eugene hadn't been bothering her. Later, when he had been alone in his room, he had realized just how possessive he had acted and he had felt a little ashamed of himself because of it. Beth had proven time and time and again that she could take care of herself. He had known that Beth had gotten Eugene under control, and yet he hadn't been able to keep from intervening.

Daryl didn't even want to begin to think about what that actually said about him and his feelings for Beth, that didn't seem to be fading away at all.

* * *

Daryl put the crossbow on the bench in front of Carl and Noah, pulling the squirrels he had tied around his waist off and putting them on the table. They both pulled back with scrunched up noses and Daryl smirked at them. “The two of ya remember wha' I taught ya? How to clean the critters?” he asked.

Carl poked one of the squirrels with his finger and nodded. “Ya want us to clean 'em for ya?” he questioned.

Daryl nodded. “I wanna take a walk 'round the perimeter with ya dad,” he told the kid.

“But you just got back from a hunt,” Noah pointed out. “Aren't you tired?”

“Nah,” Daryl shrugged. “Just clean 'em up an' take 'em to Carol. She'll smoke 'em or somethin'.”

He handed Carl the smaller knife he usually used when skinning the small animals and the boy took it with a small nod.

“Let's go to the backyard,” he told Noah, who picked up the squirrels, saluting Daryl once before they walked off. Daryl chuckled at the sight of them and shook his head before turning around to Rick who was waiting on him, knife attached to his belt, backup rifle strapped to his back.

“Hey, Daryl!”

Daryl stopped dead in his tracks and clenched his jaw, turning slowly to face Beth who was standing on the porch, leaning over the railing as she looked at him curiously.

“How did the hunt go?” she smiled at him.

His heart did those stupid flips that made him feel like he was a fucking teenager again and he shrugged at her. “Fine,” he replied shortly.

“Ya get anythin' good?” she wondered.

“Mhm...” he hummed, causing her to narrow her eyes at him. She seemed to understand that he once again wasn't going to say anything else, so she tipped her head once and then turned to walk back into the house again, leaving him feeling like a useless piece of shit.

He knew that he would continuously disappoint her, until he finally figured out what he wanted or what he was actually able to talk to her about without feeling like a complete idiot. Sighing silently to himself, he turned back to Rick, who watched him with an amused expression.

“Shut up,” Daryl mumbled as he passed the former sheriff, who only raised his hands in surrender.

“Didn't say anythin',” Rick pointed out.

“Ya were thinkin' it,” Daryl said, as they walked toward the far fence.

“I was thinkin' nothin',” Rick tried, but Daryl looked over at him with a skeptical look on his face. “Fine, I was just thinkin' how Beth doesn't seem willing to give up on you.”

For a moment, Daryl didn't speak. Rick had certainly hit the nail on the head with that one. Beth wasn't going to give up, as far as Daryl could tell. However, did that mean that she didn't want to give up on their potential friendship, or something else? The moment in the backyard, where she had walked right into him and he had been forced to hold onto her so that she wouldn't fall over, had been somewhat of an eye-opener for him. When his hands had been on her elbows and she had been so close to him, he had suddenly realized that he didn't ever want her to be far from him. He wanted her there, right next to him, preferably at least some part of her body brushing against his so that he would be sure that she was actually there.

It had scared him; the thoughts he had gotten. Unwillingly, he had forced himself to step away from her when he had realized that he was holding on to her even when it wasn't necessary. It reminded him of that first time Beth had embraced him, back at the prison. Then he had been so uncomfortable that he hadn't even known what to do. He hadn't felt uneasy because of her specifically, but rather because of the hug itself. He hadn't been able to remember the last time someone had embraced him or if anyone had _ever_ held him like that; just to comfort him. Sure, Carol had dropped a small kiss on his cheek once in a while, but she had never pushed the limits on physical contact unless he himself initiated it, like that time after Terminus.

But it had felt different even back then, and he recalled feeling sick with himself for even allowing his mind to travel to inappropriate places. Beth had just been a little girl in his eyes up until then. Sure, she had proven to be useful when it came to watching Judith and during the time after the fall of Woodbury and the Governor's final attack, he had gone to her cell on occasion to check on the lil' Asskicker. He had begun seeing a more mature and grown up young woman then, but he hadn't thought about it until she had pressed herself to him when she had hugged him. Either way, he had forced himself to push away those thoughts and bury them deep inside.

Then, when the two of them had been separated from the others, he had struggled to keep thinking of her as a young girl. When she had first yelled at him in the woods, the day she had decided that she wanted a drink, he had seen her someone who wasn't afraid, but rather someone who was determined to live and do _something_. In that moment, she had seemed so grown up and he had wondered how he had even missed how much she had changed. Then he remembered that hug that he had locked up tight within his heart and realized that he had known for quite a while just how grown up Beth was.

And now, she didn't remember those moments they had shared. She didn't remember the moonshine shack, or the funeral home, the night she had played the piano for him nor the white trash breakfast he had prepared for her. She didn't remember any of it, and yet, she seemed to want to get to know him.

When did he become so interesting?

Sometimes, at night, when he laid in his bed, unable to sleep, he wondered whether there was a small part of Beth that might feel something for him. What if there was just a tiny part of her brain that knew that he had once been _someone_ to her? A friend, at least.

Was that why she wasn't giving up on him yet, no matter how many times he screwed up around her?

Daryl looked over at Rick, who seemed to still be expecting a reply from him. He sighed, “I know. I just don't get it– _her_.”

Rick shrugged finally as they walked along the fence. “Women are difficult to understand sometimes,” his friend told him. “If there's one thing I think is pretty obvious though, it's that Beth has become very determined. Ya shoulda seen her that day when she followed ya when ya went huntin'. I have never seen anyone run that quickly. She looked ready to tear down anyone who came between her and her mission.”

“She's stubborn,” Daryl nodded. “I wish she would just stay away.”

Rick shot him a skeptical look. “Daryl, there ain't no point in making shit up,” he said. “I know you. Why are you so afraid to get close to her?”

“I'm not gonna get her killed again, Rick,” Daryl told him honestly.

“Is that what ya think will happen if ya let her in?” Rick wondered with a frown. Daryl nodded, causing Rick to sigh. “She's survived so much, Daryl. Against all odds, she's still here. Doesn't that tell ya something?”

“Yeah, that she's strong,” Daryl replied. “I knew that before, but it didn't stop her from gettin' shot in front of me.”

“That ain't gonna happen again,” Rick tried, but Daryl just shook his head.

“I ain't riskin' losin' her again,” he told Rick, finality in his tone.

Rick still looked like he wanted to say something else, but the man shut his mouth and kept walking, changing the subject to something else. Daryl could hear him talking, offering a reply every once in a while, but his mind kept going back to the blonde that refused to leave him alone.

* * *

He wasn't sure what it was that had prompted him to wake up in the middle of the night. By the way his heart was beating frantically in his chest, he figured it might have been another dream, or nightmare, but he couldn't remember it.

Part of him was thankful that he didn't, but another, more selfish part of him, would have wanted to at least catch a glimpse of Beth and that little girl again, if only for a moment.

Daryl had never been the kind of man to imagine himself with a family; not only because of the way he had grown up, but also because he genuinely didn't believe that he would be a good father or husband. Never before had he had dreams about that kind of future, but here he was, wishing that he would get to see it at least once more. It might have been different if the woman in his dreams had been someone random that he didn't care about. Then, maybe he wouldn't keep reminding himself of the little girl that had made his heart pound wildly in his chest out of pure amazement. But no, it had been _Beth_ he had shared that future with in his dream.

Daryl shook his head at himself and got up from the bed, a sudden dryness in his mouth. He pulled on his vest and started for the door. Maybe some air would help clear his mind a bit and get his head straight again.

When he walked out of his room though, into the hallway, he stopped, staring at Beth's door. At first, he wasn't entirely sure that his mind wasn't playing tricks on him, so he took a tentative step closer, listening intently to what was happening on the other side.

A sob was heard, followed by sniffling.

His stomach twisted and automatically, he moved his hand toward the handle before pausing again. He wanted to go in and see if Beth was all right, which she clearly wasn't if she was inside her room crying like she had a few weeks ago. Knowing that she was upset on the other side of the door made him uneasy, but he didn't know how she would react to him just barging in, and to be quite honest, he wasn't sure he was the best person to comfort her either.

He recalled that day in the country club, where he had watched her break down over that damned peach schnapps before losing his resolve and just smashing the bottle against the floor. Instead of actually comforting her with words, he had made sure that she got what she wanted and felt that she _needed_. They had shared the moonshine that he had found them and briefly, she had gotten the comfort that she had been seeking, not through words, but through actions. He might have comforted Carol in the past, when they lost Sophia, and tried to be there for both Carl and Rick when Lori died... But he it had never felt quite natural for him to just throw away all his common sense, just so that he would make someone happy. When he had been alone with Beth, he had honestly thought that she was the last person that was alive from his group. He hadn't wanted to lose her too and he hadn't just wanted her to be happy, he had _needed_ her to be.

Now, he was once again torn. Should he step inside and comfort her, despite telling her several times over that the two of them had never been close? Or should he stay away, and let her be the strong person he knew she was, so that she could get through it alone, because really, once shouldn't be dependent of anybody in this world.

Another sob sounded and Daryl finally put his hand on the handle, starting to open the door, when he suddenly felt someone's eyes on him. He turned around, hand still on the handle, only to see Morgan standing at the end of the hallway, next to the stairs. Morgan watched him curiously, as if anticipating his next move. Daryl let go of the handle as if it had burned him and took a step back, feeling like he had just been caught stealing cookies from a cookie jar.

Morgan silently watched him for another minute before motioning with his head for Daryl to follow him. The other man started down the stairs again and Daryl glanced at Beth's door once more, hearing that the crying had become more silent before finally sighing and walking after Morgan.

He followed him into the kitchen, where Morgan poured them both something to drink from the liquor cabinet.

“It's just vodka,” Morgan said, handing Daryl one of the glasses before taking a small sip from his own. Daryl watched the man briefly, before putting the glass to his own mouth, taking a large gulp of it; the alcohol burning down his already sore throat. “Why are you awake, Mr. Dixon?” Morgan frowned as he sat down on a chair by the table. Daryl leaned back against the counter, tapping his finger against the glass.

“Hmm... Couldn't sleep,” Daryl replied. “What are you doin' up? Isn't Tyreese s'posed to be on watch?”

Morgan nodded slowly. “He is,” he said. “I just woke up to go check on Beth. I do so every night... She doesn't know,” he added when he saw Daryl's questioning look. Morgan shook his head and chuckled, “The lil' Lady is very proud of herself, I believe. She doesn't want me coddling her, but it makes me feel better to know that she's alright and isn't having any nightmares. Usually, I just stand by her door for a bit and listen, to make sure that she's still asleep.”

Daryl hummed in reply, but didn't say anything else as he raised his glass and drank the last of the vodka. He wasn't much for drinking these days, knowing that he needed to be alert. He could count on one hand the times he had drunk anything since the apocalyptic shit started happening around him, the most memorable two being when he had gotten drunk with Beth and that one time in that bar when he had basically confessed to Rick that he had felt something very non-platonic for Beth.

“She was havin' another nightmare,” Daryl mumbled, looking at Morgan. He waited for the man's reaction, but Morgan just offered him an affirmative look.

“It's strange that she had another one so soon,” he informed Daryl. “Usually, they come every three weeks or so, unless you count that first month when she wasn't even able to speak.”

“Why didn't ya go to her?” Daryl asked then.

Morgan tilted his head, something Daryl remembered seeing Beth do on several occasions as she observed him. The man watched him before countering, “Why didn't you?”

Daryl couldn't believe that Morgan could be so blunt about what he was obviously seeing. The last time, Daryl had been the one who had come to Morgan and asked him to talk, but Morgan had then too been able to turn the conversation around so that it ended up about Daryl's feelings for Beth. Now, he had done the same thing, but there was a lightness in his tone that told Daryl that he hadn't meant any offense with it.

“Not my place,” Daryl replied. “Wouldn't have known what to do.”

“I think it would have come naturally,” Morgan mused, resting his chin in his hand as he put his elbow on the table. “I'm sure Beth wouldn't have minded, considering how she's been goin' after you all week long.”

Daryl felt his face heat up a bit although he forced himself to keep his eyes on Morgan. “I'm tryin' to keep her away,” he said honestly. “I'm tryin' to keep her safe.”

“And she won't be with you?” Morgan frowned.

“I got her killed the last time,” Daryl said as the conversation began feeling a bit similar to the one the two of them had shared when Daryl had first asked him about Beth's nightmares. Then, Morgan had told him that he believed that Daryl wouldn't do anything to hurt Beth on purpose and that he believed that Daryl was a good man.

“Funny,” Morgan said, meeting his eyes with dead seriousness, “that wasn't the story I heard.”

Daryl observed him for a moment, “What story did you hear?”

“The one where Beth did something reckless that ended up with her getting shot in a hospital. The one where she was kidnapped and taken to said hospital against her will,” Morgan listed. “That version doesn't include it being her fault that she's suffering now.”

“I was with her,” Daryl confessed quietly. “She an' I were alone when she got kidnapped. I should have looked for her sooner, but I got all caught up with everythin' else... It was my fault that she died.”

“Last time I checked, she's still alive,” Morgan pointed out to him. “You can't blame yourself for what happened... I get that you don't really know me and that I didn't know Beth before she lost her memory, but I do know Beth _now_ , and that girl,” Morgan shook his head, pointing with his finger up to the ceiling. “That girl wouldn't want you to blame yourself for anything that's in the past.”

Daryl pushed away from the counter and put his glass in the sink, thinking about Morgan's words without actually looking at him. It was clear that Morgan cared deeply for Beth; the man had even admitted to thinking of her as his daughter. From what he could see, Beth felt the same toward Morgan and the two of them were close; so close in fact that Daryl had at first misinterpreted the nature of their relationship. He looked back at Morgan, suddenly worried that the man would tell Beth what he had learned about the blonde's past of being alone with Daryl.

Morgan seemed to catch the worry on his face, offering him a small smile. “I ain't gonna tell Beth anything, Dixon,” he said. “I know that some things are better to be left alone until the people involved are ready to talk about it themselves. It's clear to me that no matter what I say here, you're not ready to let the lil' Lady in, which I understand completely.”

Daryl didn't say anything again, but he did offer Morgan a short nod.

“You should probably go back to bed though,” Morgan said. “Get some rest. Who knows what Rick has planned out for us all tomorrow...” he chuckled and Daryl couldn't help but smirk himself. He knew there were still a lot of things that needed to be done. Eugene was trying to figure out a way to repair the farm's back-up generator so that they might have electricity too and from what Daryl understood, they would most likely need to go on another long run to get the things they would need.

“You're a good man, Morgan,” Daryl finally said, surprising even himself. He hadn't previously been very open to accepting the man and when they had first come across him, he had been sure that Morgan was insane. Spending weeks on the farm though, weeks that were slowly beginning to turn into months, he could see that Morgan wasn't very different from the rest of the people in their group. They had all been through things that had messed with their heads and hell, Daryl would probably be a hypocrite if he said that Merle's death hadn't left a permanent mark in his mind. If the others knew that he sometimes would hallucinate his brother, or hear his voice in his mind, they would surely believe that he had gone crazy.

Then again, Rick hadn't exactly been very sane after losing Lori and Carol too had lost her way for a while, not to mention Sasha and Tyreese. They had all been through thing and they all dealt with it in different ways, but in the end, all that mattered was that they were still alive and together.

Morgan didn't say anything when Daryl finally walked out of the kitchen, but Daryl could have sworn that there was a small smile playing on the man's lips. Daryl walked quietly up the stairs and stopped outside of Beth's bedroom again when he got there. He listened intently, but there were was no sign of her crying or being upset anymore. He went back into his own room, figuring that Beth's nightmare had subsided and laid down in bed.

No matter what Morgan actually said to him, he felt like he had made the right decision not to walk into Beth's room. Still, that didn't mean that he didn't secretly wish, deep within his heart, that he had.

* * *

The next day, Daryl noticed the change immediately, even if it didn't seem like anyone else did. Beth sat quietly at the breakfast table, picking at her porridge when he passed the kitchen on his way out. He could hear Maggie, Carol and Michonne conversing about something, but the blonde at the table didn't seem to be paying much attention to them.

He walked out though, thinking that it would only be a matter of time before Beth came out of the house and started up a conversation with him again.

Hours passed though and he was pretty sure it was soon around dinner time, but Beth hadn't come up to him even once. She was sitting on the porch with a time book in her hand, scribbling things down, an almost permanent looking frown on her face. He wiped his hands on his red rag and walked toward her, not really thinking about what consequences his actions might entail.

“Hey,” he mumbled when he was close enough, earning her attention. She looked up at him and her eyes widened a little in surprise. It was clear that she hadn't expected him to approach her. “How are ya?” he asked, feeling a little embarrassed although he didn't know why.

“Uh...” Beth trailed off, not having expected him to speak to her out of his own free will, before closing her little book. “I'm fine,” she replied, still a bit hesitant.

He half-expected her to ask him how he was too, but she didn't. Awkwardness filled the space between them and he cleared his throat. “That's good,” he said. “I, uh, have to get back to work.” He motioned to Morgan's truck that was loaded with firewood that they had chopped up and the wheelbarrow that he had been using to bring the firewood out back where Tyreese, Rick and Morgan were working on piling it up neatly.

Beth just blinked a few times and nodded before wordlessly turning back to her little notebook. Daryl frowned as he turned around, not liking the way the young woman was trying to isolate herself. Then, he thought once again about how hypocritical he was being.

* * *

Daryl grabbed his crossbow and walked outside. Michonne was sitting on the porch, staring straight ahead out in the darkness as she kept watch. It was Daryl's turn to switch with her though so he walked over to her and sat down on the steps next to her, his crossbow still in his hands, loaded and ready for the attacks he was sure wasn't going to happen tonight.

“It's quiet,” Michonne told him. “It's always so damn quiet.”

“It is,” Daryl agreed. “No trouble tonight either then?”

Michonne shook her head, still not looking at him. She was holding the handle of her katana while the tip of the sword which was covered by its sheath dug into the grass in front of her.

“It's scary,” the woman said after another moment of silence. “The fact that I'm almost completely relaxed.”

“I get what ya mean,” Daryl said roughly. “Feels like things shoulda gone to hell weeks ago.”

“I keep waiting for it,” Michonne agreed. “I keep waiting for a heard to tear everything we've managed to build down and I hate myself for being such a pessimist. I was never like this before...”

“What does Rick say 'bout it?” Daryl wondered.

Michonne shrugged. “He doesn't say anything, but I know he feels the same way. We're all too relaxed but at the same time, since we are aware of it, we actually _aren't_ relaxed. You get what I mean?”

Daryl nodded slowly, seeing the logic in what she was saying. “We deserve to relax a bit though... We've gone through too much shit already,” he told her.

“I want to relax. I want to be able to put all of it behind me and just move forward,” Michonne said, a haunted look in her eyes. “I'm getting the best sleep I've gotten in months and I'm glad that it seems like we've finally found a place where we can actually _live_ and not just make it... But I'm still not putting my guard down and I don't know whether that's right or not.”

They sat in silence for a little while longer this time, until Michonne finally pulled her sword out of the ground and stood up. “You gonna be fine out here by yourself?” she asked and he nodded.

“Yeah, you should go ahead and get some sleep,” he told her before his lips twisted into a small smirk. “We wouldn't want Rick to wait too long, would we?”

Michonne rolled her eyes at him. “Not sure what you're talkin' about, Dixon, but I sure as hell aren't gonna answer.” She began walking toward the door and Daryl chuckled as he turned to look after her.

“What? You an' Rick can tease me all ya want, but I can't tease ya back?” he asked, smirking as she walked inside after flipping him off once. Shaking his head, he turned back to look at the open space in front of him. Michonne had left behind the binoculars they used when they were on watch and he picked them up, looking through them to get a better look. It would have been difficult to see in the dark, especially considering that they hadn't put up any kind of lights so that they wouldn't attract strangers or walkers. However, the binoculars they had found along the way during their seven month long walk had night vision, which had helped them on several occasions.

He heard the door opening behind him and he turned around, ready to ask Michonne whether she had forgotten something. The words died in his throat though, when his eyes fell on Beth who was leaning against the door, still in her flannel pajama pants and the hoodie that she had worn that morning that she had happily told him that she had gotten her voice back. Her hair was gathered in a pony tail, but there were loose curls sticking out in some places. She looked a little bit paler than she usually did, but Daryl figured it might have something to do with it being so dark outside. He waited for her to say something or at least _do_ something. When she finally stepped away from the door, quietly shutting it behind herself, she moved toward him, a lot more confidently than he had originally expected. He scooted over without thinking and she sat down next to him on the steps, where Michonne had been sitting just half an hour ago.

He looked forward again, sneaking a glance at her before he did and they both remained silent. Beth was neither looking at him, nor staring ahead though. Her head was lowered as she started picking at the wood underneath her with her finger, clearly deep in thought. Daryl didn't feel uncomfortable with her there, much to his surprise. He had half-expected himself to panic with having her that close to him again, but maybe he was just too stunned by her approaching him after having spent the entire day basically ignoring him.

He didn't know how long they sat in silence, although he was fairly sure that an hour had passed before Beth startled him by speaking. “I'm glad that you found me,” she told him, still not looking at him. “I'm glad, even though I might not have seemed like it at first.” Daryl turned to look at her, but she refused to meet his gaze as she continued to speak. “I know I've been botherin' you since that day in the woods,” she said. “I'm sorry for that... I never meant to make you uncomfortable or anythin' and I can tell that you don't wanna get to know me–”

“Did ya have another nightmare?” Daryl interrupted her before she could finish her sentence. This time, Beth turned her head sharply and stared at him, her mouth falling open in surprise. He hated himself for having made her think that he didn't want to get to know her again, although in the back of his mind, Merle pointed out that that had indeed been the message that he had wanted to send to her.

_ 'It isn't anymore though,' _ Daryl thought to himself as he waited for Beth's reply.

The young woman looked at him before turning away. He saw her swallow and bite her lip before she finally nodded, confirming that she had indeed been plagued by her bad dreams again. “How did you know?” she asked him.

“Heard ya last night,” he answered her, knowing there was no point to keep it hidden that he knew more about her than she might have originally thought. “Also a few weeks ago,” he added, not mentioning that Morgan had told him a bit more about the after effects of her so called 'accident'.

“And you haven't told anyone?” Beth frowned, looking back at him again. He could see the genuine surprise shining in her azure eyes.

“Nah,” he drawled. “Didn't see how it was anyone's business.”

“Really?” Beth said, disbelief evident in her tone.

“I guess I just...” he trailed off and sighed. “I'm just lookin' out for ya, I suppose.”

He watched her, waiting for a reaction, but she kept her face neutral as her eyes moved over his face. She was trying to get a read on him, that much was certain. Finally, a small smile broke out on her face and he almost released a breath when he relaxed a bit.

“Keep sayin' things like that, Mr. Dixon,” Beth started, mischief glinting in her eyes, “and I might start to think that you actually _do_ care.”

He said nothing to contradict what she was saying and she seemed satisfied with that. She turned to stare ahead again and silence fell between them once more.

* * *

“Daryl?” Beth spoke after a while. Her voice was low, as if she had been afraid to startle him.

“Mhm...?” he hummed questioningly, looking over at her. She was still scraping against the wood on the porch nervously and she wasn't looking at him. Even in the darkness, he could see that there was a hint of a blush on her face.

“Will you tell me a story?” she asked. Instantly, she stopped scraping and looked up blankly as her mouth twisted into a smile and a small giggle escaped her lips. “Oh my God,” she shook her head, quiet giggles falling effortlessly out of her mouth. “That sounded so stupid,” she pointed out, shoulder shaking with quiet laughter.

It had been a pretty silly question, Daryl had to admit, but seeing her smile and actually hearing her laugh made up for it.

“Just forget about it...” she trailed off as her eyes settled on his face again. “Hey! Is that a smile I see?” she grinned. Daryl realized that he must have been smiling too without thinking about it and he could feel the grin on his face only widening as he shook his head at her.

“What kind of a story would ya like to hear?” he asked her instead. “I ain't tellin' ya no fairytale,” he added when he saw her happy expression.

“You're willin' to tell me one?” she asked and he confirmed by nodding. “Something about yourself then? Something that happened to you... If that isn't too much to ask?”

He almost told her that it was, but he didn't want to push her away again. The time that they had spent alone, he had shared some stories of his past with her anyway and what he hadn't told her, she had most likely figured out all on her own. Even though she didn't remember him or the stories they had already exchanged during quiet nights by the fire, she was probably the only person that he would feel comfortable just sharing a small story of his past with.

“I dunno...” he mumbled. “I ain't all that interesting.”

“Come on,” she said, nudging him lightly, moving closer without thinking. “Everyone has a story to tell... Have you ever been married?”

He looked at her sharply, taken aback by her question. “What?  _No,_ I ain't ever been married,” he replied. “Why would ya ask that?”

Beth shrugged, “I figured that maybe you had some epic love story that you could share. Or if you'd had either a wife or a girlfriend at least, you might have something to say about her.” Then Beth frowned, raising an eyebrow at him. “Unless you're not into girls, which would be fine too.”

“I'm not gay,” Daryl told her, feeling a blush rise to his cheeks. That had not been what he had been expecting her to say. “And I never had a serious relationship with anyone...” he trailed off and looked away. “Though, there was this one girl,” he found himself saying before he could stop.

“I knew it,” Beth beamed at him. “So there was a girl.”

Daryl's shoulders rose in a half-shrug where he tilted his head to the side, “We weren't together or anythin'.”

“But you liked her,” Beth pointed out, her smile still on her lips.

“I... I s'pose I did,” Daryl admitted. “Ya really wanna hear this crap?”

“It's not _crap_ , Daryl,” Beth reprimanded him sternly. “It's important to remember the people we once cared about. I would love to hear about her, if you're still willing to share.”

“There ain't much _to_ share,” Daryl said, trying not to think about how difficult it must be for her not to remember anything about her past and the people _she_ once cared about. “It was a long time ago... She was different than other girls. I met her after the world went to shit and all that...” He met Beth's gaze but she didn't saying anything, waiting for him to continue, which he finally did.

“She liked to sing,” he said. “She sung a lot, even when I didn't think there was any time for it. I thought she was immature because of it... That she wasn't ready for this world. I didn't think she fit in here, in this darkness, but now...” he shrugged, clearing his throat a bit as he looked away, no longer being able to look into Beth's eyes. “Now I find myself missin' even hearin' her humming.”

A beat passed between them until Beth spoke. “What happened to her?” she asked, the laughter and amusement from before when she had joked with him gone and replaced by seriousness instead. 

“She just disappeared,” Daryl told her, his voice a mere whisper. “Disappeared outta my life one day and I ain't sure I'm ever gonna see her again.”

“I'm sorry,” Beth whispered back, reaching toward him. He didn't flinch when her hand came to rest over his, which had been digging into his knee without him even realizing it. Turning his head, he looked at her again, searching her eyes for any sign that she recognized even a part of his story.

What surprised him the most was the fact that he found himself wishing she would remember at least something. A part of him had hoped that his small story would trigger something, like her love for music or _anything_ really, which would bring back memories that he could no longer share with her.

Disappointment filled him though, when he realized that Beth wasn't remembering anything and he wondered if she ever would.

He didn't think through his next move, much like any other move he had been making around her recently. Although, it seemed to him as if his brain had sent his hand the signal all on its own without even considering her reaction. He turned his hand that she had placed her own over and it seemed like Beth reacted on instinct as well when she laced their fingers together, squeezing his hand lightly. He glanced at her again and noticed that she was watching him intently, her mind trying to catch up with what was happening. She looked down at their hands and then up at his face again, but she made no move to pull away. Her eyebrows furrowed briefly as something flashed in her eyes and Daryl's heart beat just a little bit faster.

“I don't know whether I knew you before, Daryl,” Beth finally began, the frown on her face easing away the longer she looked at him, “but I wasn't lying when I told you that I wanted to get to know you.”

He felt her grip on his hand tighten once more before she stood up, letting go of his hand. She walked to the door and he heard her stop, but he didn't dare to turn back to look at her, not sure what he would do if he did. When he heard her step inside and close the door behind her, he continued to look ahead. His hand was still burning from her touch and it felt as if her fingers were still there, laced with his. He clenched and unclenched his hand a couple of times, willing it to feel normal again, but it wasn't cooperating.

No matter how many times he tried to tell his brain to stop thinking about Beth, or to keep his body from reacting to her touch, it didn't listen. After telling Beth the story about the girl who sung too much, he felt bitter at the fact that she hadn't understood that it had been  _her_ he had been talking about. She had been the only girl he had been able to think about when she had requested to hear about the women of his past; she had been the only one who had been important enough to remember and he didn't even want to start contemplating what it meant that he had thought about her, when Beth had mentioned 'love'.

All he knew was that he had failed at keeping away from her and that he honestly didn't even mind it. He wanted to be close to her, he needed to be near her; to see that she really was alive and breathing and just  _there._

That night, he decided that from now on, he was done with pushing her away. He would take every day and every conversation as it came. Sure, he might still be awkward and uncomfortable at times and he may not be sure what to say every now and then, but he sure as hell wouldn't willingly push her away and ignore her.

He had missed her.

And it was about damn time that he allowed himself to get to know her again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It sure is about damn time, isn't it? ;)
> 
> Sooooooo? What did you think? Can you guys guess which thing that happened in this story that is going to become a re-occurring thing in this story for a while? Please, tell me what you thought about the chapter in general and which scene was your favorite! :)
> 
> Lots of love and many hugs! xx
> 
> P.S. Next up, Beth is gonna remember something...something sad...


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth has a nightmare that keeps returning to her. When some gaps begin to fill, she suspects that it might actually be a memory coming back to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, here's an early update to celebrate that the show is returning! Thank you so much for all your kind words so far and especially to all of you who have recommended this story to other people! :) Don't forget to read the ending note because it's kind of important! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 11

_Beth stared at the man in front of her. He was kneeling on the grass, hands bound behind his back. His white hair and white beard and kind eyes... She took him all in. Her focus was on him as she watched the scene in front of her unravel. She could see Rick, talking to someone; a bunch of blurry people in the distance._

_Someone gently, quietly tried to get her attention, pressing something into her back. She took the shotgun automatically, arming herself, preparing for battle, it seemed._

_Rick was still talking to the blurry figure that was standing behind the man; the same man who held Michonne's katana sword in his hand. Beth's gaze moved to the side and she saw Michonne kneeling as well._

_What was happening?_

_Panic filled her chest as the old man lifted his head. It felt as if he was looking right at her for a moment, right before his gaze settled back on Rick, head still held high. Rick said something else, but he was too far away and Beth couldn't hear him. She clutched the weapon in her hand._

_The man with the white hair, white beard and kind eyes looked ahead, a calm passing over his face. She could just barely make out the hint of a broken smile on his lips, as if he knew what was coming._

_The next thing she knew, the man behind him had swung Michonne's sword, the blade embedding itself in the side of the old man's neck._

“ _No!” Beth screamed, agony filling her as she tried to move forward, but something was in her way. Next to her, she heard Maggie scream and then all hell broke lose when bullets started flying. Beth watched in horror as the old man fell to the ground, blood pooling by his neck, his smile still on his lips._

* * *

Gasping, Beth shot up in her bed, grabbing the knife she slept with under her pillow in her hand. She breathed heavily, eyes moving around the room to make sure that she was safe. Swallowing thickly, she pushed her covers away and moved toward the door, her knife still clutched in her hand as she swung it open. She stopped then, her hand still on the handle as she stared at Daryl's closed door, trying to figure out what she was doing.

Had she really been about to run to Daryl's room?

Since when had she began feeling so comfortable around Daryl that she actually went to his room? She had never been in there since the archer had moved in and she wasn't sure that he would be comfortable with having her there, no matter how much more regularly the two of them had begun talking to each other.

Two weeks had passed since that night on the porch, when she had decided to tell him that she understood that he didn't want anything to do with her. Two weeks since he had surprised her, but instead of pushing her away, letting her in by sharing a story from his past. It hadn't just been any story either. No, it had been about someone he had once cared about, someone he still probably thought of and missed, if he had decided to tell Beth about the person.

Beth wasn't blind. She had seen the emotions playing on Daryl's face as he had told her about the girl who he had though sung too much until she had disappeared and stopped singing. Although, she couldn't say that she was a hundred percent certain, since she was still learning how to read the hunter, but she was at least ninety percent sure that Daryl had been kind of in love with the girl he had told her about. It had just been something about the look on his face, that had made Beth think that if _she_ had ever been in love, that would have been the way she would have looked if she had been thinking about the person she loved.

If Daryl was aware of the fact that he had loved the girl he had spoken about, she wasn't sure.

He seemed like the kind of man who didn't really understand what love was. Not that she would be any better at knowing, since she knew that she _hadn't_ been in love with anyone. Maggie had told her a bit more about her past boyfriends, and yes, she might have cared for them, but she hadn't loved them. The word love was something that she would reserve until she was absolutely sure that she had found the one man that she wouldn't want to live without. In a world like the one they were currently living in though, she realized that finding that man would be difficult enough, but also managing to keep him alive would probably be damn near impossible. She just couldn't see herself ever falling in love.

Yet, there had been a moment, when he had allowed her to hold his hand, that she had felt _something_. She suspected that he too much have felt the change inside of her because he had just watched her silently for a moment, almost as if he had been hoping for her to say something, but she couldn't think of anything _to_ say. His story, about the singing girl, had seemed familiar, but at the same time so foreign. It was as if she had known the girl herself once upon a time, but she hadn't been able to bring herself to actually ask him about the girl that Beth suspected he had had feelings for.

Nevertheless, it wasn't her place to pry when it came to Daryl and his potential feelings for the girl. She still didn't know what it was that had prompted her to ask him to tell her a story, but as soon as she had uttered the words, she had worried that he would become defensive and never speak to her again. He hadn't though, which she was grateful for, and now, the two of them engaged in almost daily conversations.

Their talks were usually short though and they weren't as deep as that conversation on the porch had been, but she liked them anyway. She liked being around him, despite his sometimes sour state, and he seemed to genuinely be enjoying her company. At other times, she could see that he was tense and simply didn't approach him until he sought her out and he seemed to be able to tell when she was having a particularly bad day as well.

Sometimes, all it took was a look, and she would know that he was aware of her presence. He would work hard on a daily basis, never resting and she would, after finishing her own chores, come out and sit either on the porch or on the bench and watch him work. She wondered if he found her staring at him creepy, but since he never said anything, she was sure that he didn't mind.

Eugene had proven to be quite kind once one got to know him. He had apologized to Beth several times over for the way he had acted, awkwardly stalking her and gawking at her. Beth found that Maggie had been right when she had told her that Eugene was harmless and truth be told, Beth quite enjoyed hearing the scientist (who wasn't actually a _real_ scientist) explain to her how some of the technical things worked around the farm.

On their latest run, Rick, Tyreese, Abraham, Glenn and Daryl had found some solar panels on some houses a couple of miles away. They had gone through great lengths to take them off the roofs and bring them back to the farm, where they hoped that Eugene would somehow manage to make them work. The scientist had been working day in and day out in his room trying to figure out how to attach them to the roof and to connect them to the back-up generator that still hadn't been fixed in the basement. Daryl and Tyreese had been helping him repair it though and they were all hoping that they would have power by the end of the week or so.

Things were moving on smoothly on the farm. Maggie and Rick had taken to farming a bit, even going as far as to put out a plan on how they would plant the seeds they had found once winter was over. Carol and Noah had happily taken on the kitchen duty and Carol had told Beth how much she enjoyed being back in a real kitchen and just be able to relax while stirring a stew. Beth herself liked cooking well enough, but she much rather spent her days either in the backyard, teaching Carl how to throw knives, or helping Tara and Rosita with the cleaning. She hated physical work though, even though she had pulled her own weight when she had been alone with Morgan. Now however, she figured that there were more than enough people around so that she could skip out on it. She only helped when she knew that it was absolutely necessary. Glenn, Sasha and Michonne seemed to be the people who focused the most on going on runs. Sasha didn't seem as used to it as Glenn and Michonne though, but she loved going out, hating to be stuck on the farm for more than three days in a row. Her brother sometimes shared his concern about her restlessness, but Sasha insisted that she would go nuts if she were to start farming next to Rick and Maggie.

Then there was Father Gabriel.

At times, the reverend helped Carol and Noah in the kitchen, but mostly, he spent his day either in the garden reading from his Bible, or walking by the far fence. He would still sometimes look at Beth, but she had learned how to ignore him after Noah had told her that it wasn't worth getting into arguments with the man who just wouldn't change his strange behavior. Each and every night though, for two weeks, the pastor had insisted that they all say Grace before eating, to thank God for giving them another meal in these dark times.

Beth had fought hard to keep a snicker from falling from her lips when Daryl had mumbled that Father Gabriel should be thanking _him_ for catching such a delicious rabbit, while Carl had started laughing out loud, earning a stern look from Rick and Michonne.

Baby Judith had been getting more active too. She was now crawling around the house and when he wasn't working with Eugene and Tyreese on the generator in the basement, Daryl had taken to baby-proofing the house. He and Glenn had found some gates that they used to block the stairs and the front door so the little girl wouldn't crawl out when no one was looking and he had made sure that all the doors had some kind of block so that Judith wouldn't hurt her fingers. Beth thought it was very sweet, which she had told Daryl and she had been surprised to see the man blush before he told her that he would do anything for the girl that he had named “lil' Asskicker” when she had been born.

Beth wanted to know more about the people in her past, but at the same time, she was a little scared of what she might find out. She knew that there was a reason for them not being there on the farm and that reason was that they were _dead_. How they had died, was something that she felt torn about wanting to know. From what she had understood, most of them had passed because of walkers, but others, like Carl's mother for example, had died in childbirth due to blood loss. She didn't ask about it though because she knew that it was also a touchy subject, however, sometimes, she would overhear Maggie and Glenn talking to each other as they remembered past friends.

And now, Beth had dreamed about a man, whose head had basically been cut off in front of her.

As she had thought about the way things had changed over the last two weeks, her breathing had calmed somewhat and she had gathered herself. She walked back into her room and shut the door behind her, closing her eyes as the horrible image of white beard turning velvet filled her mind again. The pain in her chest wasn't subsiding and she just _knew_ that she had known this man somehow. No name would come to mind, but she felt like they had been close.

She had had the nightmare before, but the people around the old man, Rick and Michonne, had been just as blurry as the man who had dealt the blow with the sword. Now that she knew their voices and recognized their faces, they would appear more clearly in her dreams which meant that she was able to put some things together. It wasn't much though; no full blown memories yet, but just simple smiles from time to time or a nice word of sentence that still didn't make much sense when she woke up, but at least it was something.

She wondered about the man though and she wondered who he had been. She wanted to find out but she wasn't sure that she knew who to approach with it. It wasn't exactly as if talking about seeing people get decapitated in her dreams was something that normal people talked about. Besides, it would most likely bring forward more painful memories for the rest of her family and she didn't want them to hurt emotionally just because she was curious and wanted answers.

Looking out the window, she noticed that it was still dark outside. Sighing to herself, she lit the candle on her desk and opened her journal, opening the page where she had previously scribbled down her nightmare. She erased some things and wrote Rick and Michonne's names there instead, now that she knew that they had indeed been there. Filling in the rest of the details that she remembered, she tried to figure out who to approach about the dream, knowing that it would have to be someone she knew she could trust.

* * *

“Beth is teachin' me how to throw knives,” Carl stated as he sat across from Daryl on the bench.

Daryl looked up at the kid with a raised eyebrow as he continued cleaning his bolts with his red rag, not having had time to do so after his last hunt. “I know,” he stated. “She's been teachin' ya for two weeks now.”

“Yeah,” Carl drawled, looking a little dazed. “I just still think it's kinda amazin' that she's alive. Guess I never would have expected to have her teach me something like knife throwin',” he mused.

“Ya getting' any good at it?” Daryl questioned, not really wanting to talk about how it was still difficult to sometimes believe that Beth was with them after everything; that she had survived after everything.

“I hit the tree this mornin',” Carl said, “but Beth keeps tellin' me that I need to patient.”

Daryl nodded quietly as he moved on to cleaning his crossbow. “Then ya gotta listen to her an' pay attention,” he simply told Carl. “She's good at the throwin' an' if she tells ya to be patient, you be patient.”

Daryl meant what he was telling Carl. He may not have watched her train the kid, but he knew for certain that Beth was good at the knife throwing, since he had seen it first hand when she had saved his life all those weeks ago in the woods. She knew her way around with those things and he didn't doubt that she could teach Carl. The only problem Daryl could see with it was that Carl was still somewhat trigger happy. The boy wanted to learn and all that, but he was used to guns, which meant that he actually had little to no patience. Either way, if there was anyone who could teach him the virtue of patience, it was Beth.

He remembered how she had been when he had been the one teaching her how to use his crossbow. In the beginning he had corrected her posture about a thousand times as well as her stand, but she never complained about his nagging. She picked up on things quickly though, so perhaps patience wasn't exactly relevant in that matter. After just a few days, Beth had learned how to aim and shoot straight with his crossbow, but the strength in her arms wasn't there, which meant that she still depended on Daryl when it came to loading the weapon again. Nevertheless, he taught her as much as possible in those weeks they had been together and she had never once complained to him. He wondered how much of that determination was still inside of her and how much of that that had developed during the months she had been alone with Morgan.

Noah had told Daryl how Beth had looked like she had been about to punch Father Gabriel's lights out when the man had been making her uncomfortable. Daryl had snorted and told the younger man that he was sure the reverend deserved it if Beth had been close to actually physically harming the man. He had noticed that Beth's face always seemed to cover in distaste whenever Father Gabriel passed her by and looked at her for too long. Daryl had thought about intervening, but after hearing Noah's story, he was sure that Beth could handle herself just fine.

There was something off with Beth today though. She had been... _twitchy_.

It began at breakfast, when she offered him and everyone else a quick 'good morning' before hurrying outside. Daryl had shot Morgan a questioning gaze but the other man had merely shrugged, telling them all that she would come back when she got herself straight. Apparently, that was something Beth did whenever there was a lot on her mind and she needed time to figure things out. Maggie shared her concerns but they all figured that Morgan knew best when it came to the young woman Beth was now.

Still, at times during the day, Daryl would see Beth sneaking glances his way and then at Maggie before simply lowering her head again. It was strange and he wanted to know what was going on with her, but he didn't want to be the one to approach her. If anything, he didn't want her to feel pressured to share what was bothering her and he also didn't want to scare her away.

“Hey, Kid,” Daryl said, glancing at Carl who was still sitting in front of him. “Did ya train with Beth today?” he asked. Carl looked up at him and nodded. “She seem alright to ya?”

Carl picked a little at one of the bolts before shaking his head. “She seemed nervous,” Carl admitted. “She wasn't as focused as she usually is.”

“Mhm...” Daryl hummed, making mental notes of what Carl was telling him. “She say anythin' to ya? Or anyone else?”

Carl shook his head before lifting his gaze. “She's on her way over here,” he said quickly. Daryl didn't turn around to look at her approaching, because he was pretty sure he had felt it the moment she had settled her gaze on him.

“Hey Daryl, uh, could I talk to you for a second?” Beth asked as she came to a stop by the table. Daryl looked up at her from his seat before looking at Carl, motioning with his head for the kid to leave them alone. He was pretty sure that Carl rolled his eyes before he stood up and walked away and he reminded himself to tease the kid a little in retaliation later.

Beth sat down across from him instantly, her elbows resting on the table as she bit into one of her fingernails nervously. Daryl observed her for another moment before putting his crossbow and his rag on the table.

“You okay?” he asked, his voice coming out a bit rougher than he would have liked.

“Yeah, I just...” Beth shook her head. “I feel like I'm going crazy,” she admitted, putting her hands on her head as she closed her eyes.

“World's crazy,” he told her blankly, although he was sure concern showed in his tone. “Why would you be any crazier than the rest of us?”

“I'm not even sure where I should begin with that one,” Beth chuckled, but there wasn't much amusement in her tone.

“What's botherin' ya then?” Daryl asked.

“Are you willing to be my therapist for today?” Beth said, a challenge in her tone. He looked her over once and nodded. She played a bit with a loose tendril of hair before once again clasping her hands together. “I'm not sure where I should start,” she admitted, this time more serious.

“Tell me a story then,” he suggested, looking down at his crossbow again as he picked up his rag and started cleaning it again. “Tell me a story and I'll pretend it ain't 'bout you.”

As soon as he had spoken, it all sounded like a stupid idea. He remembered how she had told him to tell her something about himself two weeks ago, and since he had opened up after such a simple request, he figured that she might as well. She was staring at him though and he felt embarrassed for even suggesting it.

“Ya don't have to–”

“I want to tell you, Daryl,” she cut him off before he could finish his sentence. “I wanna tell you and you don't have to pretend that it isn't about me.”

He thought back to his own story, the one about the girl who loved singing; the one about _Beth_. Then, he had pretended that it wasn't about her too, but since she didn't remember her past, she didn't know that. Instead, she probably thought that he had liked some other random girl that she hadn't even known.

“I had another nightmare last night,” she finally confessed. “Though, it was more like a memory... I think.”

“Ya think?” Daryl frowned. “What was it 'bout?”

“An old man,” she told him. “He was... He looked so kind but he... He was killed. _Beheaded_ , actually. It was like an execution or something. He was kneeling and then someone cut his head off.” Daryl froze in his seat. “Am I crazy?” she asked him again, this time looking worried.

_Hershel_ .

She had remembered Hershel.

Or well, she didn't know who the man she had dreamed about was, but the scene she was describing was definitely the one where her father had been murdered. Panic began flaring in Daryl's chest. What was he supposed to tell her? How was he supposed to tell her that the man with the kind eyes had been her father and that yes, he hadn't been killed by walkers, but rather by a human who had lost his mind and was just evil through and through?

Daryl swallowed thickly, knowing he couldn't send Beth Maggie's way either. He knew that Hershel's death was a sensitive topic for Maggie still, just like Beth's had been a few months ago. He wasn't exactly sure that the older Greene sister would handle telling Beth the truth very well.

But maybe Beth didn't need to know the entire truth? Perhaps it would be easier not to tell her everything about what had happened to Hershel?

“Ya ain't crazy,” Daryl slowly began, putting his rag back down on the table. “'t was a memory. We were attacked once and the man you described was killed during the battle.”

Beth breathed out, looking a little relieved but at the same time he could see that her shoulders were still tense.

Daryl frowned, “Why did ya decide to ask me 'bout it?”

Beth bit her lip and met his gaze before shrugging. “I guess I felt like you wouldn't sugar coat it,” she admitted.

Daryl instantly felt horrible again. She had come to him because she thought that he would be honest and tell her the blunt truth instead of trying to cover it up, while all he had been doing to her since the two of them had started talking was sugar coat it. Guilt filled him but he managed to rise calmly from his seat, so that Beth wouldn't suspect that something was wrong.

“I gotta talk to Rick 'bout somethin',” he told her. “I'll see ya later.”

He picked up his crossbow and his bolts, securing them in their place before walking off, feeling Beth's eyes boring into his back as he did.

* * *

Rick had been in the kitchen, playing with Judith when Daryl walked in, looking upset.

“I need to talk to ya,” he grunted and Rick looked at him confusedly.

“Eveythin' okay?” he frowned, immediately handing Judith to Michonne who looked just as confused as he felt. Daryl shifted on his feet and shook his head.

“It's 'bout Beth,” Daryl said, looking around the room as if to make sure that the young blonde wouldn't just pop up out of nowhere.

“What about Beth?” Michonne asked.

“She remembered somethin' an' asked me 'bout it,” Daryl said quickly. “Rick, I need to talk to ya,” he added, a little more urgently.

Rick nodded and stood up, patting Judith's head lightly before squeezing Michonne's shoulder, assuring her that he would be back soon before he followed Daryl out of the kitchen.

Everyone else was out for now, so the two of them walked upstairs to the master bedroom that Rick shared with his kids and Michonne. The two of them would be able to talk privately there, since Rick could see that something was clearly bothering Daryl.

“Ya said that Beth remembered something,” Rick said. Daryl confirmed it by nodding. “And she told you about it?” Once again, the hunter replied with a curt nod.

It didn't surprise Rick that Beth had gone to Daryl. The two of them seemed to have been opening up to each other more and more these last couple of weeks. Quite frankly, Rick was glad that Daryl had finally decided to let Beth in a bit more and even though he didn't know for sure what the two of them talked about when they were alone, he had made sure that the rest of the people in their group wouldn't intervene if they saw them talking. He wanted Beth to be comfortable around all of them and he could see that the girl seemed to like spending time with Daryl the most. At times Rick wondered if it had to do with them having been separated from the rest of the group for a time, but then again, Beth didn't remember that. Or maybe a part of her did?

“She remembered Hershel,” Daryl finally said, earning Rick's attention again. He looked over at the man who he now saw as a brother. “She remembered him bein' murdered.”

“I see,” Rick said, sitting down on the bed. He drew his hand over his face. “What exactly did she say?”

Daryl  began explaining how Beth h ad been acting strange all day; distant and nervous. Rick refrained from saying that he hadn't noticed, because he knew that Daryl would most likely feel uncomfortable knowing that he was probably the only one who picked up on such things when it came to Beth. Instead he stayed silent as Daryl continued and told him that the girl had had a dream about Hershel's death, but that she didn't know  _who_ it was that she had dreamed about.

“What did ya tell her then?” Rick wondered.

“I told her that we'd been attacked and the man died,” Daryl admitted. “Then she told me she came to be because I wouldn't sugar coat it.”

“And now you feel guilty about not telling her the truth?” Rick asked.

“I don't know, man,” Daryl shook his head. “I ain't sure there's ever gonna be a day when I won't feel guilty 'bout that girl.”

Rick opened his mouth to speak when the door suddenly opened. They both turned at the same time, only to see Maggie, Glenn and Carol walk in.

“What's Michonne tellin' me 'bout Beth rememberin' somethin'?” Maggie asked, getting straight to the point.

“She remembered Hershel's death,” Rick explained, so that Daryl wouldn't have to. “But she doesn't know who Hershel was.”

Glenn frowned at that, “You didn't tell her?”

Daryl looked up sharply, disbelief written all over his face. “You woulda told her?” he challenged.

“I don't know,” Glenn shrugged. “Depends on how much she remembered.”

“She remembered his Goddamn head bein' cut off!” Daryl exclaimed. “ _That's_ what she remembered!”

“In that case, I probably wouldn't have told her,” Glenn agreed, his voice low. He looked over at Maggie who looked at Daryl.

“Maybe it would have been better to tell her? It could have maybe triggered something else,” she said, looking at Carol for support, but the other woman merely shrugged.

“I don't know whether it's a good idea,” Carol said, giving her opinion. “We should just let her remember things on her own.”

“But we all agreed that if she came to us with something, we would tell her the truth, no matter what,” Maggie argued, turning to look at Daryl again. Rick took a step toward Daryl as the hunted took one closer to Maggie, staring her down. “You agreed too,” she told him, almost angrily.

“What the fuck was I s'posed to say, Maggie?” Daryl asked, his voice raised. “'Sorry, Beth. Your Daddy was killed in front of ya by a mad man with a vendetta against our group?'”

“He was my  _ father _ ?”

They all turned sharply at the sound of Beth's voice. The girl was standing in the doorway, her cheeks a little red and her mouth slightly open as she stared back at them.

“Fuck,” Daryl swore under his breath, but Rick was close enough to hear him and he honestly couldn't had phrased the situation better himself.

“Beth,” Maggie said softly, taking a step toward her sister, but Beth shook her head, backing away. Rick watched as the young blonde turned her attention to Daryl before once again shaking her head, walking out of the room. They all remained quiet and a few seconds later, they heard a door further down the hallway slam shut.

Rick closed his eyes and sighed, pinching the brig of his nose. Sometimes he wished the only thing they had to worry about was being eaten alive by the dead.

* * *

Beth sat on her bed, furiously crossing out notes in her journal, replacing the word 'old man' with 'dad'. She didn't know what she was feeling because everything inside of her was in shambles.

She was upset with Daryl for not just telling her the truth. Did he think she was weak or something? That she couldn't handle it? Sure, the pain in her chest would indicate that she wasn't handling it very well, but she had been feeling it ever since she had first had that dream.

Even though she might not have known who the man had been to her, she had felt and remembered just how much it had hurt to see him be killed. That feeling was now magnified as well as joined by grief for a father she didn't even remember.

She hadn't heard much from the argument that had gone down inside the master bedroom, but she had gotten there just in time to hear Daryl explode at her sister, asking what exactly he had been supposed to tell Beth.

Beth had instantly seen guilt flash in Daryl's eyes when she had looked at him and it had proven to her that her instincts earlier when she had told him about her nightmare had been correct. A part of her had known all along that Daryl had kept something from her again, but she had hoped that she had been wrong.

Of course she hadn't been, and now it hurt to know that Daryl had once again lied, or at least hid a part of the truth from her.

“Lil' Lady?” Morgan's voice was heard from the other side of the door. “Could we talk? I heard what happened.”

Beth sighed deeply, standing up as she walked over to her door, opening it without a word. She paused when she saw Maggie standing next to Morgan before turning to shoot a glare at the man. He should know her well enough to know when she didn't want her sister near. The only reason she had opened that door was because she had thought that Morgan was alone. Even if she wanted to know more about her real father, she wasn't ready to talk to her sister about it just yet, since she was still to upset, even though she didn't want to show it.

Wordlessly, she walked back to her bed and sat down, closing her journal up before putting it on her nightstand.

“You okay, Kid?” Morgan asked her as he and Maggie stepped inside, closing the door behind them. Beth shrugged, not really knowing what she was supposed to say. “I heard that you remembered your dad,” Morgan stated.

“I remembered a man being _killed,_ ” Beth retorted, eyes narrowing. “I didn't know he was my father because Daryl withheld that information from me on purpose.”

“Beth,” Maggie sighed, taking a step forward. “Don't be mad at Daryl.”

“ _You_ were the one who was just telling him that he should have told me the truth!” Beth exclaimed, staring at her sister in disbelief. “You were the one who was mad at him for not telling me!”

“It's not... This is such a complicated situation,” Maggie said, putting a hand to her forehead.

“What? You mean that it's completely fucked up that I don't even remember my father being murdered?” Beth deadpanned. “Believe me, I _know_.”

Maggie seemed to be taken aback by her choice of words and her sister quickly shook her head. “Beth, no one is saying that,” she said. “What I meant to say was that I shouldn't have yelled at Daryl either. It wasn't easy for him to talk to you about our father, because he was close to him too.”

“So what? Don't you think I deserved to know?” Beth frowned.

“I think it was wrong of _me_ to try and blame Daryl for not telling you,” Maggie confessed. “I know it wasn't easy for him and I know that he was just trying to keep you from coming to me before he had a chance to talk to me and prepare me.”

“Did he tell you that?” Beth asked, crossing her arms over her chest, staring her sister down.

“He didn't have to, Beth,” Maggie said. “I've known him for years now and despite his tough outer shell, he does everything to protect us.”

Beth didn't say anything. She wanted to ask what he had done to try and save her, if she had still ended up dead. How could Maggie stand there and tell her that he cared about them all, if he had told her himself that he and Beth had never been close?

Her mind decided that that was the opportune moment to remind her of her own doubts regarding Daryl. She had known, deep in her heart all along that he had been keeping _something_ from her regarding their past together. Maybe this was it? Maybe it was all about him wanting to protect himself because he actually _had_ hurt when she had supposedly died?

If what Maggie was saying was true, Daryl might actually be one of the people who cared the most.

Beth lowered her hands slowly and took a deep breath. Deep down she wanted to both scream and yell, but she knew that it was no use. It wasn't Daryl's fault that she had put him in a bad position. She had been weighing her options all day long until she finally decided just to speak to him, because yes, even if she knew that he had been and maybe still was keeping something from her, he was someone she trusted. She just had a good feeling about him in her gut and so far, her instincts hadn't failed her.

“I'm sorry,” Beth finally said. “It was just... It became too much.”

“We understand that, lil' Lady,” Morgan said softly. “No one meant to keep anything from you. They were just trying to figure out how to talk to you about it.”

“It's okay,” Beth said, closing her eyes as she willed tears away. She wasn't going to cry in front of them; she wanted them to know that she was strong enough to handle it. Once again she met her sister's eyes, seeing that Maggie wasn't as good as her at keeping her emotions at bay. “I would like to know more about our father,” she told Maggie, who nodded, even though a sad smile covered her features.

“I'll leave you two alone,” Morgan said, as he started toward the door, but Beth grabbed a hold of his wrist.

“Stay,” she told him. “I want you with me. You promised me that you wouldn't leave.”

Morgan watched her silently before nodding, sitting down on the armchair in the corner of her room. Beth walked over to Maggie and took her hand, leading her sister to the bed as they both sat down. Maggie seemed to understand why Beth needed Morgan there. The man was the person she had depended on and trusted for seven months straight while she had been both injured and scared. Now, even though she had her family again, he was still a part of her life and she would always need to have him close. He was the only father figure she knew of and Beth didn't want him to leave just because she was about to learn more about her past.

Maggie cleared her throat as Beth took her hand and squeezed gently. “Our father's name was Hershel,” she began, a lone tear rolling down her cheek as she started telling Beth of the man she had seen so many times in her dreams, but no longer remembered.

* * *

Daryl was laying on his back when someone knocked on his door.

He nearly growled out loud as he got up and stomped up to it, ready to chew whoever it was that had come to him this late out, but he stopped when he swung the door open, only to reveal Beth standing there. She was in her pajamas once again, hair up in a messy bun, nervously twisting her hands together.

“Can we talk?” she asked. “It'll be quick, I promise.”

He eyed her and then looked behind himself at his mess of a small room before turning back again. She seemed to sense his hesitation, so she shook her head lightly, “I don't have to come in, I just have something to say.”

Daryl didn't say anything, not entirely sure that he would be able to find the words, but he knew that whatever this conversation was going to be about, he didn't want it to happen outside in the hallway where anyone could overhear them. He turned around and walked back to his bed, not even looking at her as he sat down, but he left the door open.

It was her choice to make, after all.

Beth seemed to make her decision quickly though because she stepped inside his room and closed the door behind her. He still felt guilty over not telling her the entire truth about Hershel, but what had he been supposed to do? Whatever scenario he had tried to imagine, whichever way he had contemplated telling her the truth in, had all resulted in Beth ending up hurt by him. Although, no matter how hard he had tried to protect her, he had still ended up hurting her, if her reaction earlier tonight had been a sign to it.

“You feelin' better?” he asked, not being able to help himself. He was aware of the fact that Morgan and Maggie had gone to talk to Beth after she had stormed away from them and Maggie had told the rest of them that she had told Beth the truth about Hershel. According to Maggie, Beth had proceeded to ask about the rest of their biological family and Maggie had told her both about her mother and about her older brother and how they had died.

“Yeah,” Beth nodded, biting her lip. “I just wanted to tell you that I'm not mad at you... For not telling me the truth about Hershel... _Dad_ , I mean.” She shook her head a little, as if to clear it before continuing, “I understand that I put you in a difficult position, Daryl and I promise that I won't do so again.”

It sounded rehearsed and short-clipped, as if she had been repeating the words to herself a thousand times before gathering her courage to knock on his door.

He didn't like it.

“Ya got nothin' to apologize for,” he told her slowly. “I made the call not to tell ya the truth 'bout your father. That's on me.”

“Doesn't change the fact that I asked you about something that clearly hurt you too,” Beth said. She was still standing by the door, leaning against it while he was sitting on his bed. It wasn't about being uncomfortable though, he quickly realized; she looked far more at home in his room that he felt. No, it was about giving him the space he didn't even know that he needed. Yet, Beth seemed to have gotten to know him well enough to know what he needed.

“You cared about my father,” Beth stated, her voice confident. “Maggie is convinced that you didn't just send me her way because you were trying to spare her feeling... Yet you claim that you and I weren't even friends before.” Her tone was as sharp as her narrowed eyes.

“I respected your father,” Daryl said quickly, “and I saw the pain your sister went through after she thought she'd lost _you_. I wasn' gonna remind her 'bout Hershel just because I didn't know what to tell ya.”

His lies to Beth just kept piling up, but at least that was half a truth too. He had respected Hershel and he had watched Maggie suffer after losing Beth, but he chose to once again not tell her about his own agony.

“Whatever,” Beth mumbled, looking away from him. He could tell that she wasn't fully convinced by what he was saying, and he wondered if the girl would ever just snap at him and call him out on the lies he was sure she knew he was telling. She had grown way too observant not to have noticed them. “It won't happen again,” she told him. “From now on, I'll keep my nightmares to myself.” She turned around and reached for the handle on the door when he stood up from the bed, moving almost automatically as he reached out and grabbed her wrist, stopping her. Beth didn't turn back to look at him, but her breaths came out a little heavier for some reason. His own heart was beating wildly in his chest and it felt as if currents of something were flowing into his fingertips from where he was grasping her wrist. The skin on skin contact was almost too overwhelming, which surprised him, because it wasn't as if he hadn't held her hand before.

Yet, it felt different. Almost like a small make-it-or-break-it moment where he had to prove to her where she had him, or if she even had him at all. He could sense that she was close to pushing him away and just being done with him, for both his sake and her own, but he found himself wanting to be selfish.

“It ain't wrong for ya to open up, Beth,” he said, breathing out her name. He could see goosebumps rising on her exposed skin and he wondered whether he was just imagining it, or if he was actually somehow having an effect on her. “I know I didn't tell ya the entire truth before, but I didn't want ya to feel guilty 'bout not rememberin' your old man.”

“You were protecting me then?” Beth asked, turning her head so that she could face him again. Daryl swallowed but nodded, nonetheless. “Why?” Beth wondered, her voice this time a mere whisper.

“Mhm...” Daryl mumbled, shrugging lightly. Beth's mouth dropped open a bit as she stared at him. Her eyes seemed to glaze over in that moment and he curiously watched as her eyes flickered across his face before she finally swallowed. Something had just happened, although he wasn't sure what. Beth seemed to be equally confused as him, if not more, but she didn't say anything or ask him again. Instead, she offered him a tired smile, which instantly made him forget about his worries.

“Good night, Daryl,” she said, opening the door as he let go of her wrist, the charged moment easing away. He stood in his own doorway as she walked back to her room, looking over at him one last time before she shut the door behind herself, her lower lip clutched nervously between her teeth.

“Good night, Beth,” Daryl whispered, knowing very well that she wouldn't be able to hear him anymore, right before he closed the door and went back to his bed, willing his stomach which was doing somersaults to calm down and let him sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I just wanted to quickly say that I originally planned on ending this chapter differently, which would have actually led to Beth and Daryl taking a step back in their relationship. I had planned for him to tell her to go to Maggie next time, which would have made Beth more hesitant to approach him, but as I wrote it, I realized that I didn't want them to take a step back, since they'll go through quite a few things in future chapters... So I hope this was okay with you guys, even though it ended a little...bittersweet in a way?
> 
> Oh, and also, since I live in Europe, I won't be able to watch the MSP until tomorrow (which is Monday for me), so I'll be staying off of tumblr until then and please, if you read this after the episode, DON'T WRITE ANY SPOILERS IN THE REVIEWS! Thank you for consideration! :)
> 
> As I said, thank you for all the support and for being so wonderful! I love all of you and I can't wait to hear what you think about this chapter! The next chapter is another one of my favorites and it seems like it's gonna be a long one too! ^^ Thank you for reading! :) xx


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another memory returns to Beth at a bad time while she's on a run, which causes her to lose focus when she needs it the most.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People, the amount of support I've gotten on this fic is literally breathtaking! Seriously, I am so proud to be a part of this fandom! Thank you so so much for the immense support and the sweet words you keep sending my way. It makes me smile every time someone mentions that they were recommended this fic, so thank you to those of you who keep spreading the word as well.
> 
> Now, I don't wanna waste your time much more. I have some studying to get done, and this chapter is sort of a sweet one toward the end, but a bit angsty in the middle... Another memory is coming up peeps!
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 12

Beth looked at herself in the mirror as she brushed through her hair slowly. Her clothes were on her bed, waiting to be put on but she still thought it was a bit too early to get dressed.

“ _Hey there...”_

Beth paused, her hand holding the brush hovering just above the blonde tresses. She narrowed her eyes at herself, the far away sounding voice echoing in her mind still.

“ _I hope I'm not interrupting.”_

She took a breath, calmly putting her brush back on the table, gripping the edge tightly.

“You are _not_ crazy,” she whispered to herself, like she had a thousand times when the thing holding back her memories would let go a little, allowing her a small glimpse of things she had been through in the past. She waited for the foreign voice to return, but it didn't and she let out a breath, relaxing immediately.

Ever since she had learned about her father, Hershel, she had been worried about what her brain might let her remember next. Maggie had told her about her brother and her mother and also about where they grew up, but Beth hadn't asked for any details about how they had lived after the Turn. She had only wanted to know the happy things about the people in her family, who were now gone and Maggie had complied, telling her just that.

A week had passed and Beth had gone back to normal again. She still sometimes dreamed about Hershel, but after Maggie told her a bit about the man, her dreams changed to something a bit more happier than his death. Instead, she saw him smiling, happily talking to her or scolding her for running around with Jimmy, who she still didn't remember in detail. It was better dreams though and for that she was glad. She shared some of them with Maggie, while others she would casually mention to Daryl whenever she and he talked. He wasn't very responsive, usually just acknowledging her with a grunt and a small nod or a curious look when he learned something about her that he hadn't expected. It was good though and she was happy.

But she was also restless.

She was tired of being cooped up on the farm for so long and she had had a serious talk with Sasha, who was getting to go on runs more frequently nowadays.

“I would never be able to stay on the farm for so long, Beth,” Sasha had told her. “I get that you're antsy, so why not just come along on the next run?”

Beth had brought it up at dinner one night and everyone around the table had paused– everyone but Sasha, that is– and it had only served to annoy Beth even more. Her sister hadn't thought it was a very good idea, but she had looked to Morgan who Beth knew was on her side.

“She can take care of herself,” he had told the rest of them and that had been the end of it. No one questioned Morgan anymore when it came to Beth and she was glad for that.

However, she had looked over at Daryl to see his reaction but it had seemed like the infuriating man had gotten awfully interested in picking at his food instead. Beth had tried to get his attention a couple of times during dinner, always trying to force him to make eye-contact, but when he wanted to avoid her, she had noticed that there was nothing that could stop him from doing so.

Naturally, that meant that Beth had just gone to visit him while he had been on watch that night and talked about it then.

“Are you gonna come on the run?” Beth had asked him and he had grunted before nodding. She had suppressed the urge to just roll her eyes at him when she had taken her seat next to him. “Are you coming just because I'm going?” she had wondered, but he hadn't even looked up at her or shown any kind of sign that he had actually heard her. She had waited for a reply, but it had never come, which in turn was an answer all on its own. Rather than saying anything else, she had proceeded to just sit with him until his shift had ended and Rick had come to take his place. Carl's father had given them a curious look, but he hadn't said anything and the two of them had walked in. Before Daryl had gone into his room that night she had bid him a good night and he had finally spoken back, telling her to sleep well.

Today, they would be going on the run.

It was going to be Beth, Daryl, Michonne, Rick and Glenn and  Abraham and they would be taking two vehicles with them since they would be going out a bit further. It wouldn't exactly be the first time she'd ever been on a run, since she and Morgan had gone out a couple of times when they had been alone. Although, it would be the first time since her family had found her but it didn't exactly worry her since she had been on hunts all by herself long before that and she had always been able to not mess up or put herself in danger.

“Beth?” she turned around in her chair, looking over at Carol who had just entered her room. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah,” Beth nodded quietly, immediately picking up her brush again.

“You aren't nervous, are you?” Carol asked as she walked further into the room. “May I?” she wondered, motioning for the brush. Beth nodded and offered it to Carol, who took it as she began combing through Beth's tangled up curls. “It would be fine if you were... I know Maggie is,” Carol chuckled.

“Maggie needs to learn that I'm not a little kid anymore,” Beth stated calmly. “I can take care of myself.”

“Oh, I know,” Carol nodded. “If you couldn't, you probably wouldn't be alive now.”

Beth hummed in reply, thinking back at those first few months after she had woken up. Having not even been able to speak at first had nearly gotten her killed a couple of times because she hadn't been able to warn Morgan in time before walkers were close enough to attack. The man had been alert, sure, but not when they had first gotten to know each other. He had later told her about his wife and his son and she had understood why he hadn't been in his right mind. After all, she hadn't even known about the walkers when she had first woken up. It had all just been a daze.

“When are you going to get dressed?” Carol asked. “The others are already loading up Morgan's truck and Tyreese's jeep with food for you in case you need to take a longer route back.”

“Well, they sure ain't gonna need me for the heavy lifting,” Beth joked lightly.

“You sure? You got yourself some nice muscles there,” Carol retorted, gently squeezing Beth's bicep, which Beth herself had to admit, had gotten a more defined these last couple of months when she'd had to work hard while being alone with Morgan.

“Please,” Beth scoffed. “If anything, Daryl should be able to do all the work himself. Have you seen his arms?” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. Carol stopped brushing her hair for a moment and looked down at her curiously. Beth was worried that she might have crossed some kind of line, admitting that she had indeed been checking out Daryl's biceps when he'd been working around the farm and she blushed a bright red, not being able to bring herself to look Carol in the eyes through the mirror.

That was before Carol actually chuckled again, “They are Godsend, aren't they?”

Beth relaxed a bit, realizing that the woman wasn't teasing her but  actually just casually agreeing with her on the matter.  She had seen Carol and Daryl talking a few times and noticed that the two of them were close. At first, she had wondered if maybe there was something going on between the two of them, but when she had jokingly said “So, you and Carol,” to Daryl one evening when they had been sitting out on the porch together, he had snapped his head up at her and told her sternly that: “There ain't no me and Carol. We're just friends.”

She had taken his word for it and the following days, she had begun to see their relationship for what it really was: two friends who cared deeply about each other; a mother who had lost a child once and now acted over-protectively to a man who wasn't much younger than her and a man who loved the woman the way one would love either an older sister or a mother. The observation had made Beth relax a bit, right up until she began questioning just  _why_ she would need confirmation that there was nothing going on between Daryl and Carol.

She must have been frowning while she had been thinking, because Carol put a hand on her shoulder and smiled at her through her reflection. “Everything is going to be fine today, Beth,” the older woman told her, clearly thinking that Beth had been worried about the run rather than the rush of feelings she experienced whenever she was near Daryl.

“Yeah, it's gonna be fine,” Beth echoed as she wondered just why she still had a bad feeling in her gut.

* * *

“You be careful out there, okay?” Maggie told Beth for the thousandth time. Daryl suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at the older Greene sister, but he knew that her concern was justified. The run they were going on would be to yet unexplored territory, further South from the farm. Usually, they traveled North whenever they needed supplies, but they had been planning on checking things out the other way as well. It had just been a pure coincidence that Beth had requested coming along on this particular run, and even though he knew very well that the girl could indeed take care of herself and hold her own out there against walkers, he still worried a bit, if not as much as Maggie.

“Yeah, yeah,” Beth said, zipping up her jacket as she nodded at her sister before embracing her. “Don't let Carl and Noah anywhere near the three knives I left behind though, okay? I don't want them poking someone's eyes out just because they thing they've gotten good at the knife throwin'.”

“Hey! You told me I was getting better,” Carl accused, but there was a hint of playfulness in his tone.

“I wasn't lyin',” Beth countered. “I just don't need the two of you dulling my knives just because I can't take them all with me.”

“Well, I'll keep him away from them,” Noah told her, putting his hand on her shoulder.

Beth rolled her eyes at him before turning to Carl, “And you keep an eye on him.” Then she paused for a second, “Actually, on second though, maybe I should have just locked my room up.”

“Don't worry, lil' Lady,” Morgan told her as he stepped forward and embraced her. Despite knowing that it was nothing but a fatherly hug, Daryl looked away, putting his crossbow inside Morgan's truck as he moved to the driver's seat. He wasn't being jealous, he told himself, over and over again. He was just being... _something_.

* * *

“I'm trustin' you to keep them away, Morgan,” Beth told the older man as she pulled away from him before hugging Maggie too. “And don't worry, Mags. I'll keep your husband safe,” Beth winked teasingly.

“Hey! I can keep myself safe just fine,” Glenn protested as he kissed Maggie softly.

“I'm just sayin',” Beth shrugged, a teasing smirk on her face. She turned toward the jeep, where Rick, Michonne and Abraham were already seated. Michonne seemed to silently be asking her if she was fine and Beth nodded curtly before moving to Morgan's truck, that Daryl would be driving. She climbed in, scooting closer to Daryl to allow some room for Glenn. Looking up at the hunter, she noticed that his hands were clutching the steering-wheel tightly. She frowned at him, putting her hand on top of his which brought his attention to her. They hadn't exactly been initaiating any physical contact since the night she had told him that she wasn't mad about him not telling her about Hershel, and the simple, hopefully reassuring, touch seemed to have surprised him.

“We'll be fine,” she told him softly.

He nodded and swallowed, “I ain't worried 'bout that.”

“What are you worryin' about then?” she frowned.

He smirked, “Listenin' to Glenn talkin' about nothin' in particular for hours.”

Beth let out a giggle, surprising even herself as she covered her mouth with her hand, but the sound seemed to only b ring a smile to Daryl's face. She liked seeing him smile, even if it was a rare  occurrence.

She forced herself to look away from him though, when Rick made his way over from the jeep. Daryl rolled down the window on his side and Rick looked in at the two of them. “You guys gonna be okay with following us? Abe's got the map that Eugene marked out for us,” he explained.

“Sure thing,” Daryl nodded. “We'll make a signal if we need to pull over.”

“If we see any cars along the way, we should stop to siphon gas,” Rick told them.

“Got it,” Daryl nodded again. Rick turned his gaze toward Beth and she waited for him as well to ask her whether she would be fine, but the man surprised her by only offering her a nod and a smile before walking back to the jeep and getting in. Daryl rolled up the window and Beth leaned back in her seat. When she heard Daryl groan, she turned her attention to him, but he was glaring right past her.

He rolled down his window again and stood in his seat, sticking his head outside the truck. “Glenn, get your tongue outta Maggie's throat and let's get goin'!” he called out. Beth instantly turned her attention to her sister, who was indeed locked in a passionate embrace with her husband. The others seemed to have retreated back to the house and only the married couple were left outside.  Beth felt her face heat up and she looked away, turning to look at Daryl instead. Of course, she quickly realized what a mistake that had been because once Daryl got seated again, he turned to look at her as well and somehow, they ended up with their faces just a couple of inches apart. He moved back so quickly, clearly not having expected the sudden closeness and he actually hit the back of his head against the window.

“Son of a bitch!” he exclaimed, rubbing the back of his head, his cheeks coloring a bit as he looked anywhere but at Beth.

Beth once again covered her mouth with her hand, looking at him in concern as she tried hard not to laugh at the silliness of the situation. “You okay?” she asked him and he grunted something in reply that she didn't quite catch, but she did notice how the tips of his ears turned a bit red too. Finally, Glenn got into the car next to Beth, mumbling something about Daryl always embarrassing him with his bluntness around people. Daryl seemed to ignore him though as he started the truck, following after the jeep that Abraham was driving. Beth once again leaned back in her seat, not wanting to think about the fact that her right side was brushing against Daryl every time she moved a bit. She swallowed, the close proximity suddenly making her a bit nervous. On her left, Glenn was waving at Maggie and Beth sighed deeply as she hoped quietly to herself that this run would go all right.

* * *

Daryl parked the truck next to the jeep that had stopped.  He opened his door and stepped out, shooting a questioning look at Michonne who was casually leaning against the jeep.

“Why the hell we stoppin'?” he asked her.

“Abraham needed to relieve himself,” she replied coolly. “He and Rick should be back in a few. If you need to go to the bathroom, you should do so now. I'm not sure we're gonna be stopping again later.” Daryl turned around and looked over at Glenn and Beth who had gotten out of the truck as well. Glenn hurried off after Rick and Abraham while Beth remained standing by the truck, extending her arms up in the air as she walked toward Daryl and Michonne.

Daryl tried very hard not to notice the way her shirt rid up as she stretched, rolling her shoulders as she pulled them down again, but it was difficult not to notice the creamy skin and the way her flat stomach seemed to be a little more defined than he would have expected it to be.

Not that he had been thinking about Beth's stomach.

“Hey, Michonne,” Beth smiled softly, coming to lean against the jeep next to the other woman. “How's it going with Rick and Abraham?”

“Just fine,” Michonne said. “I've been trying to ignore the two of them discussing which football teams they used to root for before all that stopped mattering.”

“Sounds like fun,” Beth said, although it didn't sound like she meant it at all. It did make Michonne's lips quirk up though.

“Hilarious,” the woman agreed sarcastically.

“Why didn't you go with the other guys, Daryl?” Beth asked then, turning her attention to him instead.

“I ain't gotta piss,” he told her, which was part of the truth, he supposed. To be quite honest, the need to take a bathroom break wasn't that big although his need to keep Beth in sight was kind of overwhelming him a bit. He wasn't sure whether he should be leaving her alone, despite knowing that she technically _wouldn't_ be alone.

“You go ahead,” Michonne told him, seeming to understand what his real problem was. “I'll keep Beth company and when you and the other men return, she and I will go as well.”

Daryl eyed her for another moment before finally nodding, walking away. He glanced back one last time though, hating that he was leaving Beth behind, but he knew very well that she wouldn't exactly enjoy accompanying him on a bathroom break. He found Rick and the others a little further down the road, a dead walker by their feet, but not one of them seemed very bothered by it. In a way, it was kind of a scary thought how none of them were even scared by the walkers anymore. Daryl wasn't sure he even remembered a time when there wasn't a walker somewhere and it was a horrifying thought. Then again, he had always had a bleak look on life, never expecting himself to be any better than Merle or his father. Sure, deep down he might have _wanted_ to be different, which was probably why his brother had always called him 'the sweet one', although it was difficult to be sweet in a world where everyone judged you instantly because of your surname or the way you looked.

He unzipped his pants, trying to remove the thoughts of his old life out of his mind. After relieving himself, he quickly zipped up and headed back toward the cars. He must have been lost in his thoughts for a little too long, because Michonne and Beth were just returning from the other side of the road where they too must have taken a break.

“I'm serious,” Glenn was saying when Daryl finally got close enough to hear. “It's at times like this that I miss the radio. Music could always fill awkward silences and it would be a blessing right about now.”

Daryl frowned, “What are ya goin' on 'bout now?”

Glenn looked at him and then at Beth who had also stopped to curiously eye him. “I'm not going on about anything,” Glenn shrugged. “I'm just saying that I miss music.”

“Well,” Michonne said, “you could always just sing to yourself, I suppose.” Her tone was dripping in amusement and Daryl had to snort.

“Please, don't give him any ideas,” he told Michonne, who chuckled lightly. Abraham laughed and even Rick offered a snicker before looking down the road, narrowing his eyes a bit. Daryl looked that way as well, seeing a couple of figures moving in the distance, but they seemed to be going slow. It would most likely take the walkers a while until they got to them and by then they would have started driving again.

“Oh, come on,” Beth smiled lightly. “Have you ever heard him sing? Maybe he's good?” She turned toward Glenn, “Are you?”

“I sound about as good as a cat being run over by a truck,” he admitted sheepishly. “Maybe you could sing something?” he suggested and Daryl froze.

His gaze moved toward Beth, who actually threw her head back as she laughed wholeheartedly. Her shoulders shook as she giggled and she finally shook her head. “I don't sing,” she snorted at Glenn, a wide smile on her face nonetheless. “What's the point of singing nowadays anyway?”

Daryl's heart clenched at her words.

She didn't sing.

_'Keep singing...'_

He swallowed thickly at the memory that came crashing in and he was forced to look away so that he wouldn't show anything on his face. At first, her three-worded sentence had just hurt him, but then, he started panicking instead. What if Glenn said something about her and her love for music? What if anyone told her that she used to sing a lot, and she looked at him and just _knew_ , without even having to ask, that she was the girl he had told her about that night?

Daryl looked over at Glenn and gave him a pointed look that he hoped the other man would understand. A second passed by when Glenn finally looked back at Beth and said: “Well that's too bad. I figured girl's had good singing voices.”

It was one of the lamest excuses Daryl had ever heard, but he hadn't expected a better cover up by Glenn while he was under pressure.

“Does that mean that I too should have a good singing voice, according to your logic?” Michonne asked. Her questioned eased the tension around them a bit, which Daryl was thankful for. He looked down the road, at the walkers who were slowly approaching them.

“We should get goin',” he told the others.

“Yeah,” Rick agreed. “Especially if we wanna get back to the farm before nightfall. We still have a few more miles to go.”

“Let's go,” Daryl said, starting back for the truck. He got in without saying anything else and when Beth and Glenn followed him in, he sensed Beth's eyes on him.

_'I don't sing.'_

He nearly cringed when he though of her saying that, but instead, he turned the key in the ignition and drove after Rick and the others who had already pulled out on the road.

* * *

Beth wasn't really sure what it was that had changed with Daryl after their small stop, but she was certain that it had had something to with Glenn talking about music and singing. The moment her sister's husband had mentioned it, she had for some reason looked over at Daryl. A pained expression seemed to have crossed his face, but the second she had seen it, it had disappeared. She suspected it might have something to do with the girl he had cared about; the one she was now almost certain that a part of him had actually loved. Glenn's comment must have been a reminder of her to Daryl and she felt sorry for his pain.

That however didn't excuse his change in behavior towards her. When they had gotten to the small mall that had been their destination, he hadn't said one word to her as they went through store after store together. They had all paired off two and two and she had automatically moved to stand next to Daryl when Rick had suggested it. It wasn't that she didn't trust the others, but she knew that Rick and Michonne worked well together which meant that she had assumed that the two of them would want to check the place out with each other. She still didn't know Abraham very well since the man was always working around the farm or hanging around Rosita, but she knew that she wouldn't have been comfortable going off alone with him if she didn't even know what would be okay to talk to him about. She both trusted and knew Glenn well enough by now, but she had still been drawn to Daryl, mostly because of the evasiveness he had displayed when they had arrived at their destination.

Beth was sure that his coldness had been the main reason that she had paired up with him. She wanted to know what had gotten him so twisted up inside that he could barely look at her and the only way she saw herself finding out was by getting him alone.

Daryl turned on his flashlight as Beth took out her large hunting knife out of her belt, preparing for any stray walker that might turn up. The mall seemed to be mostly empty though, so she wasn't very worried. On the other hand, the most empty-looking places sometimes turned out to be the most dangerous ones.

They rounded another corner in the food store, showing yet another empty aisle. Beth began relaxing a bit, scanning the shelves for any food that might still be useful.

“Do you think we're gonna find anythin' useful here?” Beth asked, dusting off some of the cans as Daryl stopped. He didn't answer her and his shoulders were tense, making Beth sigh loudly. “Are you gonna tell me what's botherin' you or are we going to pretend that everything is fine?”

“Nothin' is botherin' me,” Daryl muttered, still not looking at her as he glanced around the corner.

Beth rolled her eyes, “You haven't looked at me since–”

Daryl held a finger to his mouth as he turned toward her. He motioned for her to remain quiet as he moved around the corner, his crossbow raised and loaded, prepared for any kind of attack. Beth held her breath, her hand on her knife while her other hand rested on one of the thin throwing knives she had with her.

The sound of cans falling to the floor put her in motion and she rounded the corner without even hesitating. “Daryl!” she exclaimed in a half-yell, her knife held high as she moved. She was startled when her eyes met with Daryl's stormy blue ones, her breath catching in her throat as he caught the wrist of her hand that was holding the knife that she had been close to putting into him.

“It was just a rat,” he told her, slowly lowering her arm. She breathed heavily as she blinked up at him, narrowing her eyes when she saw his lip twitching.

“You're an ass for scarin' me,” she told him, pushing him away lightly. He took a step back without much fuss, but there was still amusement written on his face.

“I scared ya?” he asked then, his smirk turning into a frown.

“I thought you were attacked or somethin',” she shrugged.

“No need to worry 'bout me,” he told her and once again, she suppressed the urge to just roll her eyes at him. She opened her mouth to say something else when she saw Rick and Michonne entering the store from behind Daryl. Rick held up his hand in a small wave as the two moved closer.

“Ya find anythin' useful?” Rick asked then when they were close enough.

“We were still lookin' through the store for any biters,” Daryl informed him. “Thought I heard somethin' but it was just a rat.”

Michonne looked over at Beth, “You okay?”

Beth nodded, not wanting to admit that she had almost freaked out for a second because she thought that Daryl was in danger. Of course, she was well aware of the fact that Daryl could take care of himself, but she still remembered that day in the woods when he had been attacked by several walkers at the same time, nearly losing the fight.  If she hadn't been there that day, or if she had gotten there too late, Daryl wouldn't be standing there today.

“I'm fine,” Beth said silently as she turned around to walk back to the shelf she had been inspecting earlier. “Daryl's just paranoid, hearing things that aren't- _Ah_!” she gasped when someone took a hold of her and pulled them close to her body, twisting her around in their arms.  She dropped her knife before her hands lifted to her attacker's arm that had wound itself around her throat. At first she thought that she was dead for sure, that a walker had gotten her, but the person holding her suddenly chuckled, his tone low and his hot breath against her ear.

“Beth!” she heard Daryl exclaim as he, Michonne and Rick appeared around the corner, weapons raised.

“Hmm...” the person holding her hummed lightly. “What do we have here, boys?” the man drawled, revealing that he was indeed human. “How 'bout the three of you put your weapons down an' me an' my boys won't hurt this pretty little thing?”

Beth winced, turning her head away from the man holding her as he pressed his nose into her neck, inhaling deeply.

_The man pressed himself against her tightly. Beth blinked up at him as he smirked down at her._

Her eyes snapped open and she began struggling against the man who held her in a tight grip, but he only laughed again.

“Seems like we found ourselves a fighter!” another man behind her exclaimed. “The Boss might like her. She's pretty.”

“The Boss has had enough ladies,” a third man said darkly. “We should get some action for once... He don't have to know anythin' 'bout it.”

Beth looked over at Daryl, Rick and Michonne who had been forced to put their weapons on the floor. Behind them, stood three other men, guns pointed at their heads. She didn't know when they had put their weapons down, or how she had missed the other three men that were in front of her. All she knew was that she needed to get away from the man holding her and that the situation was bringing _something_ back to her; something that she wasn't sure she _wanted_ to remember.

“ _Hey there. I hope I'm not interrupting.”_

Beth shut her eyes tightly again as the same voice from this morning returned to her.

“ _Dawn was just asking for her key-”_

“ _Was she now?” the man asked her, circling closer, ever so slowly. Beth stared at him wide-eyed, glancing at the door, knowing that there was no way for her to get away from him fast enough without seeming suspicious. “See, I was just with Dawn... And I don't seem to remember that,” the man told her. “It's okay,” he then said, stepping even closer. “She don't have to know._ Maybe _,” he drawled, taking another step closer, “there's another solution? A little win-win for both of us...” he suggested, pushing her against the desk behind her as he nuzzled her neck, inhaling her scent. “So how 'bout it, Bethy? We gonna work somethin' out here?” he asked her and she found herself nodding._

“Look at her!” one of the men laughed. “She's fuckin' scared of us! She can barely breathe!”

Beth forced herself to take another shaky breath, tears welling in her eyes as she willed the memories away. She needed to stay focused so that she could find a way to get out of this situation.

“ _Good girl_... _” the man commended her, pulling her close to her body again as his hand traveled up under her shirt_.

“Don't you _dare_ fuckin' touch her!” Daryl yelled suddenly, bringing her back to reality. She stared at him wide-eyed as the man still holding her faltered a little with his grip on her before releasing another laugh.

“Ain't no fuckin' way we're just gonna let a pretty girl like her walk away,” he said. “Jamie an' Adam here behind me haven't had a lady in months! The Boss had all of 'em reserved for himself... Only the ugly ones are left, but what can one do, right? If ya wanna fuck ya gotta take what's given to ya!” Once again, the man let out a bark of laughter. “Jamie's right though... What the Boss don't know, won't hurt him...”

His other hand which wasn't holding Beth in place began traveling down her side, moving toward her flat stomach, down to the button of her jeans. She struggled against him, her brain finally realizing the seriousness of the situation as she kicked her foot back, effectively kicking him in the shin.

“ _Ouch!_ Dammit woman!” the man yelled as she turned around in his grip, butting her forehead against his nose, hearing a satisfying _crack_. He stumbled back, clutching his already bleeding nose as Beth grabbed one of her throwing knives, throwing it at one of the men who had just raised his gun toward her. It connected with his shoulder, making him howl in pain and then, before she could throw another one, an arrow had embedded itself in his forehead and he had fallen down dead. The second man raised his hands in surrender, but he too was quickly killed by another bold flying at him, hitting him right in the chest. Beth hurri edly walked to him, pushing her knife into his head, making sure that he wouldn't come back as a walker. She turned around and saw that Michonne, Rick and Daryl had gotten the three men behind them taken care of; she didn't as much as cringe when she saw one of them decapitated on the floor, blood slowly spreading around the body.

“What tha fuck is goin' on here?” Abraham's voice rang out in the store. He walked toward them with a limping Glenn next to him and he seemed to have a bruise forming around one of his eyes. Beth looked over at Daryl and the other two members of her group, but then she saw that Daryl was walking with determined steps toward the man who had been holding her, who was now clutching his nose as he laid on the ground. She was amazed by the hunter's strength once again when he pulled the man up, pushing him against the shelf. It was the first time she actually _saw_ what her attacker looked like. Up until then everything had been a blur. He was older than Daryl, clearly, his shaggy light brown hair already graying with age and greasy from not being washed for too long. There were wrinkles around his eyes, as if he had spent too much time squinting at the sun and his teeth were yellowed as he gritted them while Daryl held him up against the shelf. The man's clothes were torn and tattered, proving that he had been out in the world for a longer period. As Daryl held pressed him against the shelf, Beth couldn't help but think that he looked smaller somehow, and a lot more scared.

“I told ya not to fuckin' touch her,” Daryl growled, dangerously low as he glared into the man's eyes. The man stared at him with horror in his face and a beat passed when his eyes suddenly glazed over and his head fell forward limply. Daryl took a step back and Beth saw Daryl's bloodied hunting knife still sticking into the man's heart. He pulled it out and then quickly pressed it into the man's forehead, blood oozing out, covering his hand as he did.

Daryl pulled back with a disgusted grunt and let the body drop to the floor before he wiped his hand against his pants, removing the blood that had gotten on him.

“We were fuckin' ambushed by three guys in the fuckin' clothes shop!” Abraham continued to bellow. “They got a good punch in before Glenn and I could take care of 'em though.”

“They dead too?” Rick asked and Abraham nodded.

“Weren't no walkers anywhere, but people have gotten fucked up,” he said. “Jesus Christ...” The man shook his head as Glenn looked over at Beth worriedly.

“Beth? You okay?” he asked, but his voice sounded distant in Beth's ears.

_The scene with the man flashed again. She could feel his hands moving up her skin, his touch making her squirm away from him._

_Then, she saw Noah. Noah falling from above her._

_Darkness and then walkers everywhere._

_There was ringing in her ears._

Beth let out a loud gasp as she stared open-mouthed at Glenn. Then, she turned her attention elsewhere, toward Daryl, who was staring at her. In two large strides though, he had moved toward her and she didn't even know why she didn't as much as flinch when he pulled her into his arms. Instead, her arms wound tightly around his neck as she pushed herself up on her toes so that she could hold him better. His forehead was against her shoulder and she couldn't help but think that it must be hurting his neck considering that she had her face pressed against his chest. One of his hands was buried in her hair, and she hadn't even noticed it until his grip on her tightened just a bit, at the same moment that she tugged him a bit closer, breathing in through her nose, hoping that his scent would somehow ground her again.

For all that Beth knew, they might have been standing there for hours and when they finally pulled apart from their embrace, she looked up at him, willing herself to calm down. She felt a lot better after Daryl's surprising show of affection. Her hands had been shaking before but now, she felt more grounded. She seemed to have needed that hug more than she would have ever suspected and Daryl looked quite relieved himself that she was okay. Her hands were still on his arms and his hands were on her elbows, much like they had been that day in the backyard when he had come to keep an eye on her and Eugene.

Beth saw the exact moment that Daryl realized what he had done and she felt it underneath her fingertips because the muscles in his arms tensed at the same moment that he took a step away from her, letting both of their hands fall to their respective sides again.

“I'm fine,” Beth finally spoke, her voice a bit hoarser than it had been earlier, probably due to the man's tight grip around her throat earlier. She cleared her throat, looking over at Rick and Michonne, at anyone but Daryl really, because she knew that the hunter was currently glaring at his own feet, questioning his life's choices or something. “Why didn't we know these men were here? How did we not hear them coming?”

First and foremost, she was frustrated with herself for being so reckless, getting caught off guard. She had always minded her surroundings when she had been on runs with Morgan and no walker had ever been able to get the better of her. Then again, those men hadn't been walkers. They had been _bad people,_ who had purposely stayed hidden somehow.

“Daryl said that he'd heard a sound,” Michonne reminded them. “They could have just been hiding in one of the other aisles,” she said, sounding disgusted as she glared down at the body of the man who had been holding Beth.

“They kept goin' on 'bout some 'boss' of theirs,” Daryl then said, looking up at them, but keeping his eyes away from Beth.

“That means there's probably a bigger group somewhere in this area,” Rick nodded slowly. “In other words, we take what we've found so far and get the hell outta this place.”

“Couldn't agree more,” Glenn said. “I grabbed some clothes for Judith. Should be good enough for Winter, whenever it comes around.”

“Thanks, Glenn,” Rick said, patting the man on the back lightly, but Glenn winced, complaining that one of the men had gotten a couple of hits in on his ribs.

“From now on, we stay away from the South,” Abraham told them. “We'll only go on runs up North. Don't wanna risk any of these bastards getting a whiff of us and followin' us back to the farm.”

“Couldn't agree more,” Michonne said, echoing Glenn's words from earlier as she walked over to the shelves and began shoving cans into bags, not even checking the date beforehand. “We'll just throw away whatever we can't use when we get to the farm. The cans can be used for other things as well.”

Beth nodded, but her eyes finally moved to Daryl, who finally seemed to be looking at her again. He offered her nothing more than a curt nod before he too began collecting things for them to bring back to the farm. His nod seemed to only make Beth's gut twist and turn, but in a somewhat good way.

Or at least, it was much better than the way her newly brought back memories had twisted her up inside.

* * *

Glenn fell asleep quickly once they began their drive back to the farm.

They had worked quickly to gather all the things they thought they might be able to use, not even getting rid of the bodies of their assailants before finally just driving out of that hell hole. There was a bad feeling in Daryl's gut though, when he thought about the way those men had talked to each other, mentioning that there were more of them somewhere. He knew that they would have to tell everyone back at the farm about what happened on the run and make sure that no one ever planned any more trips that led them South. It still made him uneasy though, knowing that there was a risk that the leader of those men might come looking for answers as to why they were dead. They would simply have to make sure to lay low for a while and not draw any unnecessary attention to the farm.

It was quiet in the car now, which made it a bit easier for Daryl to think through everything that had happened and everything that could have gone wrong. Those men had been armed with guns and he was sure that he could have gotten shot at least a dozen times just because he had lost his shit when he had seen that piece of shit touching Beth. He, Michonne and Rick had only been lucky that Beth had managed to catch them all off guard when she had finally gathered herself, which had led to them all being too surprised to see his group's attacks coming.

He remembered the way Beth had been practically hyperventilating as that greasy man had held her and touched her. Daryl had seen something in her eyes then, just like he had seen her eyes glaze over a few times when the two of them had been alone. It had been the only sign that showed that she was remembering something from her past. She always got that hazy, distant look in her eyes, although this time, whatever she had remembered, must have scared her in some way or at least caught her so off guard that she hadn't been able to break free of the man's grip.

Daryl knew that Beth was strong; she had survived a fucking gunshot to the head for Christ's sake. Although, maybe that had had to do with luck more than strength? Still, it didn't change the fact that she was a survivor, like the rest of them. They had all been living in this crazy world for far too long now, surviving while people around them died. Out of all of them, in Daryl's mind at least, Beth was one of them who had been through the most, even though she might not remember all of it.

Despite the fact that she seemed to be a lot tougher than she had been when the two of them were alone, Daryl couldn't help but sometimes see the girl he had known before. When she said something sometimes, it reminded him of something the old Beth would say, or when she simply looked at him silently, it would remind him of the girl who had helped him burn down his past. However, the changes were also there. She _was_ a lot tougher and she _was_ fierce, not taking anyone’sshit anymore. It wasn't limited to him, like it had been when the two of them had been alone. Instead, she now told everyone what she thought without even contemplating that they might not listen to her, because she knew very well that she did have authority on the farm. Her thoughts mattered and as far as Daryl could tell, she was aware of that.

His reaction earlier, when he had seen her eyes move toward him, seeking him out just as some memories of hers seemed to have stumbled into her mind, had been pure instinct. The moment he had seen her distraught face, he had thought of that day outside the moonshine shack when he had been the one upset and she had comforted him by embracing him, showing more emotion toward him than anyone had ever shown before. He had walked up to her, reached for her, trying to keep her from falling apart in that mall without even thinking what the others around them might think. She had held onto him too though and when her arms had wrapped around his neck, he hadn't been able to keep himself from just holding her tighter against himself. When he thought back, he realized that his actions could have made her uncomfortable, considering that it was the touch of that man that had brought whatever memory she had remembered back. Whatever it was that she had remembered, had shook her and he knew that she could have received his touch badly.

But she hadn't.

She had held him back just as tightly instead.

Daryl couldn't help but glance sideways at her, where she sat beside him. Her eyes were set on the road ahead of them, but he could see a thousand thoughts working their way in and out of her brain. He wanted to say something to her, to make sure that she was okay again, but he didn't know how to ask without making her uncomfortable. The idea of reaching out and touching her arm or something did cross his mind, but he decided against it when he remembered that he might have just been lucky that she had needed comfort from someone she knew back inside that store.

If Glenn was awake, he might have been able to start some kind of conversation or something, but the man was exhausted and a little injured from their attack. Michonne had checked him over and she had been sure that he had a bruised rib or something, since the men who had attacked him and Abraham had kicked him there when they had tried to get the better of them.

Although Glenn was asleep, so Daryl wouldn't be able to get his help to start a conversation with Beth, and they still had about two more hours of driving ahead of them.

He didn't think he could handle two more hours of silence though, which was strange all on its own considering that Daryl had always been a man who had enjoyed the quietness. His eyes once again drifted to Beth, who was now looking down at her lap, her fingers playing with the cross-bracelet she had around her wrist. From what he could tell, she was still thinking about what had happened and he just wanted her to forget about it for a moment at least.

“Hmm...” he cleared his throat before he began humming a bit. His focus remained on the road, even though he felt Beth's gaze move to him as he kept humming a song he didn't even remember the name of. All he knew was that it was the same song that she had played for him in the funeral home, when he had been laying in that casket.

“You're humming,” Beth pointed out softly. He glanced at her and nodded, but didn't stop humming. She turned on her side a bit, so that she could lean her head against the seat and watch him driving, her back slightly turned toward Glenn who was leaning against the door, snoring softly.

Daryl couldn't sing for shit, although humming didn't necessarily need any musical talent anyway. He was sure that his humming sounded a bit rough though and he was trying to do it as quietly as possible so that he wouldn't wake Glenn up. He felt a bit awkward though, since it wasn't something he would normally do, but the idea had just seemed good when he had thought of it a mere minute ago.

“Why are you humming, Daryl?” Beth whispered tiredly. His heart clenched a bit when he noticed just how broken she sounded too and it made him stop his humming altogether. He had wanted to make her feel better and he had been hoping that it might make her remember a better time, when she had actually been happy.

Or at least, she had seemed happy, but Daryl wasn't sure he would even know if she had truly been so.

“Don't stop,” she told him then. “Keep humming...”

He licked his lower lip, not being able to help himself. “I thought my humming annoyed you,” he said, his voice low and gravely as he replayed that conversation they had had in the funeral for the thousandth time since he had thought that he had lost her forever.

“Well, there ain't no jukebox,” she shrugged before freezing up. Her response seemed to have come purely on reflex, and he forced himself not to react, despite the small smile that was tugging on his lips. It occurred to him that that memory, even if she hadn't gotten it back completely, might still be somewhere inside of her mind. He took his eyes off the road for just a moment to look at her face, hoping he would see some kind of recognition there.

Her eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, her shoulders still tense but she seemed to be staring right through him. It looked like she was remembering a part of it, maybe, but he wouldn't be sure until she actually said something about it, which he doubted that she would considering the day that she had had.

“Thought ya said there was no point in singin',” he said and his voice seemed to reel her back to reality.

“Well, yeah,” she replied lamely. “But that was before I realized that you were a professional hummer,” she joked then, a small smile on her lips.

“'Professional hummer', huh?” he mused, his own lips tugging up again of their own accord. “Well, I'll charge by the hour from now on then.”

“Come on, Daryl,” she said, lightly touching his arm. “I'm your biggest fan right now, cut me a deal or something.”

He didn't look at her, but he thought of her hand on his arm and figured that it was a good thing that she had been the one to initiate physical contact between them after everything that had happened. It meant that she still felt comfortable around him, which he took as a win, knowing that the outcome of today's events could have caused her to pull away from them all.

“Fine,” he finally said. “First show's free if ya don't tell anyone 'bout it. Don't want 'em all linin' up to hear me hummin' some shit song.”

“If people start linin' up,” Beth said, “I'll make sure to tell 'em that I'm your manager and I'll charge 'em an extra portion of potatoes in exchange for you humming all the shit songs you know.”

He suppressed another smile, wondering silently to himself how he could be smiling after all the things that had happened today and all the things that had come close to happening. If Beth hadn't pulled away from that man, or if he and the others hadn't gotten the other men under control, he was certain that the men would have taken their turn on Beth.

The mere thought of it made anger flare up inside of him as the whole scene played out in his mind again. Then he remembered the way he had acted and the things he had spoken, threatening the man who had been holding her. He was sure that Beth must be thinking about it or at least that she had thought about it, unless of course she hadn't even heard him say it considering that she had been so panicked due to remembering something.

“Thank you for today,” she said silently, almost as if she had read his mind. “And for this. For making me feel better.”

“It's nothin',” he told her, feeling his face heat up a bit. He was actually glad now that it had gotten dark outside, so that she wouldn't be able to see the redness he was sure was coloring his face.

“It is,” she insisted. “You made me feel better by _humming_ , Daryl. Maybe there is a reason to keep singing after all...”

It was more of a statement than it was a question and it made a warm feeling spread inside of Daryl to hear her say it. Had he known that it would only take him humming something in order to try and make her feel better after such an eventful day, he would have actually maybe even sung something to her and risked her ears being permanently damaged or something.

He could tell that she still was a bit unbalanced after everything, but as she closed her eyes when he continued to hum, there was a small smile on her lips. After a while, he was sure that he could hear her humming along to the song, but then he figured it might just be his imagination or wishful thinking, because it seemed like Beth was actually asleep.

Once again, she proved him wrong though, startling him when she reached over and put her hand above his, her thumb brushing his knuckles lightly before she moved her hand to his arm instead, resting it on his upper arm as she moved a little closer to him. Her cold nose pressed against his shoulder and he heard her exhale deeply before her breathing finally evened out and she relaxed against him.

He continued to drive, not caring that it got a tad more difficult to use the gearshift, because Beth was finally asleep and relaxed by his side.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, yes, yes! I know! Before anyone asks, no, Beth did not remember the whole funeral home, her singing to Daryl conversation. Her reply to him came as a reflex and she got sort of a "deja vu" feeling, if that explains it. But yeah, it means a lot that she replied that way, because it means that her memories are still somewhere in there! :) I also know that Daryl isn't much for singing (or at least in my mind he isn't ^^) and him humming for Beth was just something that came to me late at night... Especially after I broke Daryl's heart with Beth saying that she doesn't sing. I felt the need to sorta make up for it and well, I hope you liked it. :)
> 
> The chapter wasn't supposed to end like this, but I pushed a few things around so the original ending of this chapter will be in the next one instead, which is also Bethyl filled and we'll also see Noah make a return! After that memory, Beth needs to have a conversation with him...
> 
> Hope you liked it! Don't forget to leave a comment and I'll do my best to write as quickly as possible so that I'll be able to update on Sunday! :)
> 
> Love you all! xx


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth thinks about her jumbled up memories and talks to Noah about one thing she remembers. She and Daryl share yet another tender moment and Beth is surprised by some of the things she's been feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Quick note here: Thank you so much to everyone who commented the last chapter! Your response always amazes me and it truly means a lot to me.
> 
> I just want to clarify something real quick: Beth knows that her last name is Greene and she knows the last names of everyone in the group, including Daryl. I just never wrote a scene about it, but I did mention that Tara (who will be making a come back in the next chapter btw) told her about the people in the group.
> 
> And regarding the bad guys in this story, they will return, but not any time soon. When they do come back, however, they will be dealt with in, like, one chapter because I don't want to drag that sub-plot out since this story is mainly just focused on Team Family bonding with Beth again as well as Beth and Daryl's relationship building up from scratch again. I hope that will be okay with you guys! :)
> 
> Now, please enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 13

The morning after the run Beth woke up with a massive head ache and a sore throat. She groaned as she sat up in bed and stretched a bit before rubbing two of her fingers against her temple. As she got dressed, pulling on her ripped jeans she glanced at herself in the mirror, suppressing a gasp when she saw that there was some bruising across her collarbones and around her throat, where the man had grabbed her yesterday on the run. She traced one of the bruises with her index finger, knowing that Maggie would surely go crazy if she saw it, before pulling on her gray hoodie, which would help cover it up.

Last night when they had returned to the farm, Maggie, Carol, Rosita and Morgan had been waiting up for them. Beth had been asleep when Maggie had rushed to the car, but Daryl had gently woken her by shaking her shoulder. As soon as Beth had realized that she had been sleeping while leaning against Daryl, her face had heated up and she had been glad that it was too dark outside for him to actually see her blush. She was grateful for the fact that Daryl hadn't commented on it though, because if she were to be frank, she had to admit that she would have had no idea whatsoever as to what kind of excuse she could use. It was one thing admitting to herself that she had felt comfortable and at peace with Daryl so close by and that him humming to her had lulled her into a dreamless sleep, but it was an entirely different thing to tell him that. She was certain that he would have been embarrassed by it and she was afraid that he might push her away. Daryl clearly wasn't the type of person who just walked around humming, so she was sure that he had done it just for her.

But why would he do that?

Why would he do something that he wasn't comfortable with, only so that she would find some kind of calm and peace? The fact that he would do such a thing for _her_ , made something inside of her stir that she couldn't quite grasp yet. It had been such a sweet gesture, so unexpected, that it had warmed her all over. She recalled the embrace the two of them had shared in that store; after all the bad men had been killed and Beth had remembered Noah falling and she had somehow finally gotten her mind back to reality. Looking at Daryl had been a reflex and she didn't know whether him striding up to her and hugging her had been an instinctive act on his behalf too. If it mattered, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she had needed it more than anything at that moment and Daryl had been the only thing that had kept her from falling apart completely.

Beth still hadn't gotten all the pieces of the puzzle together though. The memory she had gotten back was only partial, but during the night, she had dreamed a bit more clearly on some of the parts at least. She could remember clearly now that Noah had fallen down an elevator shaft of some sort and that she had been waiting for him below. Her dream had been like a rewind where she had climbed up the shaft instead of climbing down and when she had reached the top, she had looked around and found herself in a place similar to a hospital hallway.

What bothered her most though, was that she didn't remember what had happened with that man that had been touching her. His face hadn't originally been clear, but last night, it had been. She could even remember the police uniform he had been wearing and the mere thought of it made her feel disgusted; that a man who had once been a cop could do such a thing or even  _imply_ such a thing to someone.

And Beth didn't know whether he had done it to her.

Or did it count as rape if she had actually agreed to his offer of a 'win-win'-situation by nodding? She felt sick just thinking about it, but the events after the police officer had reached under her shirt to touch her skin remained blank to her. There was no way for her to know what had actually happened there, unless she asked someone who knew.

That had been what Beth had been thinking about while they had been driving back to the farmhouse. She had felt tense and unsure and not knowing what had transpired between her and that man had been putting her on edge.

Daryl's humming had been a blessing to her. Now all she wanted to know was  _why_ he had done it. Had it really been all for her or was there something else to it?

Beth swallowed as another emotion twisted inside of her gut. She didn't want to be an awful person, but for some reason, her mind wouldn't let her drop the thought of the possibility of Daryl humming only because he had been thinking about that girl he had once cared about. The man had told Beth about how much he missed the sound of the girl's singing, and he had actually even mentioned missing hearing the mystery girl  _hum_ . Had his impromptu humming been some kind of subconscious thing that had happened because he had been thinking about that girl, and not Beth?

Beth didn't want to be selfish and a bad person, because she had seen it in Daryl's behavior that night on the porch just how much he had cared for the girl. Actually, Beth was certain that he had had deeper feelings for her as well. She didn't want to be selfish and say that she had actually been hoping that he had only hummed for her, and thus not been thinking about the other girl.

But she was kind of selfish and it only made her feel even worse about all of it.

She didn't know exactly what it was that was going on between her and Daryl at the moment. Maybe nothing was going on at all and she was just imagining things? It still didn't change the fact that he, besides Morgan, had been the only person that she had somehow managed to connect with on a deeper level without even talking to him that much. That, all on its own,  _meant_ something to Beth and she didn't want to ruin it all because she was feeling just a tiny bit jealous.

Horror coursed through her as she imagined what Daryl's reaction might be if he ever found out what she was thinking. He had maybe been in love with that girl and here Beth was, being jealous over the girl who was probably dead, over something that she had no right of being jealous over.

_ Someone  _ she had no right to be jealous over.

Beth shook her head at herself and her thoughts. She didn't want to over think anything. At the moment she needed to keep her focus on finding out more about what had happened in that hospital, but she wasn't sure whether she was ready to actually talk to anyone about the police officer and the way he had been touching her. For now, Beth decided, she would only ask about what had gone down in that elevator shaft with Noah.

And the only person she could think of asking about it, was Noah himself.

* * *

Daryl sat outside on the porch, staring out at the open field as he breathed in the cool morning air. It was getting colder in the mornings and the leaves on the trees were slowly shifting colors to yellow, orange and red, proving that autumn was on the way. During the day though, it could still get pretty warm, so they still had some months to go before winter came around. Daryl wasn't very worried about it though because as far as he could tell, they were well prepared for spending the winter here on the farm. They had chopped up enough firewood to last a good couple of months and Abraham and Tyreese had built a small shack in the backyard that they would be able to use as a smokehouse for the meat that Daryl brought back. If they managed to get the generator in the basement working, they would hopefully even have electricity before then.

He sighed to himself when he heard the door open behind him as Carl rushed past him with little Judith in his arms. So much for the quiet morning, he thought to himself, although he didn't really mind watching as Carl held up Judith who was learning how to walk.

“Come on, Judy! Walk to your big brother,” Carl said as he set her down, helping the little girl stand. She wobbled a bit but managed to find her balance, her closed fist going to her mouth as she sucked a bit on her knuckles. “Take a step for me, Judy,” Carl once again cooed and Daryl looked down so that he wouldn't show the smile on his face.

It felt strange to be smiling after everything that had happened the day before on the run. Seeing Judith and Carl being all normal and happy, he couldn't help but think about how much the young boy had gone back to being a kid since they had found the farm. It seemed like being in a safe place again had softened Carl a bit and Daryl was glad that the kid had gotten the chance to relax a bit.

On the other hand, he was afraid that they were all going soft.

The run yesterday had gone awfully wrong and they should have been more prepared; _he_ should have been more prepared. They should have left someone to keep watch, someone to signal if anyone came near. The men that had attacked them had gotten too close before they had gotten the situation under control and Daryl didn't like that one bit.

The mere thought of all the things that could have happened the day before; what those _monsters_ had wanted to do to Beth... The smile that had been on his lips as he watched Carl and Judith interacting fell from his face and was replaced by a frown instead.

When he had yelled out at them not to touch Beth, he had felt as if someone had just cut his lungs out. Seeing that man move his hand down Beth's stomach, to her pants and moving lower... Daryl had been about to just run at him, not even caring about the consequences of his actions. It didn't matter to him if he had gotten shot; all he could think about was getting that slimy man's hands off of his girl.

_ 'She your gal now, is she?'  _ Merle's teasing tone sounded inside of his mind. Daryl's frown only deepened as he dismissed his own thoughts. Beth wasn't anywhere near his and he wasn't sure she ever would be.

He wasn't even sure that he  _wanted_ her to be.

_ 'Nah, of course ya don' want her,' _ Merle seemed to snort.  _'Lil' Bo Peep is jus' all ya think 'bout.'_

Deciding to ignore his older brother's voice that seemed to always be acting as his semiconscious (Which was ridiculous all on it's own, because Merle hadn't exactly been the best people to ask for advice when he had been alive.) and thought back once again to yesterday.

He was certain that he would have ripped the man apart for touching Beth either way, and he hadn't been able to help himself when Beth had finally gotten out of his grip. She had incapacitated one of the assailants with her knife, but he had finished the job for her, his eyes never moving from his targets. He had known that Michonne and Rick were more than capable of handling the men that had been behind them, so he had moved forward to get rid of the other ones and help Beth. When only the leader had been left, Daryl hadn't been able to suppress the rage that had flames up inside of him. He had put that knife into the man's heart slowly, making sure to twist it just right so that he would  _feel_ the pain he deserved for even touching Beth in the first place.

It had made him feel a hell of a lot better, but nothing had felt as good as having Beth in his arms, which was maybe more dangerous than anything else. During the ride back to the farm, he had spent most of the ride humming to the girl, despite her having fallen asleep on his shoulder. He was glad that Glenn hadn't woken up at all, mostly because the younger man had been far too exhausted to do anything other than sleep. It would have been embarrassing mostly because he knew that Glenn couldn't keep a secret for too long, but he was sure that if Michonne had been there too, she would have teased the hell out of him for his actions.

“Mornin', Daryl,” Maggie greeted him as she came out of the house. 

He turned to look at her and nodded curtly, offering her a short-clipped, “G'mornin',” before once again looking at Judith, who was happily clapping on the ground as Carl groaned, trying to make her stand up all on her own. “How's Glenn?” Daryl asked the older Greene sister, not really knowing why she was seeking him out. He recalled a time after he had almost lost his shit on Rick in a bar, when Maggie had begun keeping an eye on him, approaching him without asking about Beth, even though she had clearly wanted to. Since they had been reunited with Beth though, their interactions had been brief and almost non-existent though, unless one counted the argument the two of them had had that day that Beth had come asking about Hershel.

It wasn't that he was still mad about Maggie's reaction to the entire ordeal. His problem was that no one had said anything to her about the fact that she had basically acted as if her sister had been dead all along and that she hadn't even gone looking for her until it had been too late. It bothered him more than it should sometimes, but so far, Daryl had been quiet about it. Actually, on second thought, he thought it bothered him just enough. Maggie had stood there in that room, lecturing him about not telling Beth the truth about Hershel, when she walked around pretending as if she hadn't completely ignored the fact that he had told her that Beth was still alive somewhere while they had been captured at Terminus. There had been several occasions when Maggie would have been able to tell Beth the truth and apologize, but clearly, she thought it was better for that  _minor_ detail to just remain forgotten.

Daryl didn't forget though, but he also wasn't going to be the one who reminded Maggie, unless she angered him again that is.

Beth had told Daryl that night that Maggie had understood that Daryl had tried to protect her and Daryl honestly didn't even know why the hell he was bothering anymore.  Maggie could take care of herself and all he had been trying to do was spare her feelings, figuring that it was better not to bring up Hershel.

Maggie was clearly afraid of her behavior regarding Beth before and after Terminus coming out, but everyone else seemed to have come to some kind of silent agreement that it wasn't their place to tell Beth something that she wouldn't even remember or know what to think about. Daryl was sure that Beth would have  _some kind of_ thought about it though, but he didn't want to risk losing her again just because a part of him believed that she deserved to know the truth about who had looked for her and who had tried to forget all about her existence.

Last night when they had returned to the farm, Maggie had once again been her overprotective self, looking over both Beth and Glenn, but Daryl hadn't failed to notice the way the older Greene sister had moved on to her husband a bit too quickly once she'd made sure that Beth was unharmed.

“Glenn's fine,” Maggie drawled. “He's still recoverin' in our room. He'll probably be out all day... Good thing we don't have anything to do, ain't it?”

“Yeah, good thing...” Daryl agreed, shifting a bit where he sat, turning his attention back to Judith who was now rolling around on the grass. Michonne would have to wash the lil' Asskicker later, he realized, seeing dirt get on the little girl's clothes.

“I wanted to thank you,” Maggie said as she sat down next to him, making sure there was some room between them. She knew he was uncomfortable with her sudden approach.

“For what?” he frowned at her.

“Keepin' an eye on Beth,” she clarified. “Yesterday. Michonne told me some of what happened... You think she's okay?”

“Haven't seen her this mornin',” Daryl said roughly. “She might still be in her room.”

M aggie nodded slowly, “Still grateful that you looked out for her.”

“She saved herself,” Daryl muttered. “Didn' need us. Got the bastard all by herself...”

“I'm not takin' it back, Daryl, so ya might as well accept my thanks,” Maggie frowned at him. “I don't understand why you never just take what's given to ya...” she trailed off when the door opened behind them. They both turned around, only to see Beth walking out. When she noticed them sitting there, she paused for a brief moment, tugging a little on the gray hoodie she was wearing, pulling it tighter around her neck. Daryl narrowed his eyes as they settled on her throat where he could just barely make out a darkened piece of skin...

' _Bruises,_ ' his mind supplied and he suppressed the urge to growl out loud. He almost wished that he had made the man's death more painful, but there wasn't exactly a way for him to go back in time.

“Good morning,” Beth said, clearing her throat a little. Her voice sounded hoarser too, which only caused Daryl's anger to flare up even more.

“Mornin',” he bit out. Beth looked at him curiously, squinting her eyes a bit. She seemed almost concerned and he supposed it might have to do with the way he sounded; absolutely pissed off.

He hadn't meant to take it out on Beth, but he was still bad at directing his anger at the right person, especially since the person was already dead.

“You feelin' any better?” Maggie asked Beth, who frowned at her.

“Never said I didn't feel alright,” she stated.

“I just assumed–”

“Well, you assumed wrong then, didn't you?” Beth interrupted Maggie before she could stop herself. She winced then and her hand moved to her temple. “Sorry, my head is killin' me today... I didn't mean to snap at you.”

Daryl wanted to snort and tell her that she had every right in the world to be at least a little bit snappy, both at him for once again almost failing at protecting her and at her sister, who was making assumptions that she couldn't take care of herself– _again_.

Maggie stood up instantly and brushed her fingers across Beth's forehead, frowning, “Ya don't have a fever at least. Maybe it'll pass?”

“Yeah,” Beth agreed. “I get them sometimes. Suppose it might be a side-effect of havin' been shot in the head.”

Daryl looked up at her then, and found that surprisingly enough, she was looking at him as well. He wanted to force himself to look away from her, but he just couldn't bring himself to. As they watched each other silently, he noticed how the corner of Beth's mouth twitched up a little, in a half-smile.

And why the fuck was he looking at her mouth?

Daryl broke the eye-contact by staring right ahead at Carl and Judith who were now laying on the grass together. Carl was lifting Judith up in the air while the little girl giggled happily.

“Hey, kid!” Daryl called over. “Bring lil' Asskicker over here an' stop getting' her clothes dirty.”

Carl sat up with Judith in his lap, “Oh come on, Daryl! Judy and I are just havin' fun, aren't we, Judy?” he cooed the toddler but Daryl merely rolled his eyes and motioned for him to bring him the little girl. Carl stood up and walked over with Judith in his hands. As soon as they were close enough, Judith reached out with her hands toward Daryl, and Daryl took her from Carl's arms. He put her on his knees and bounced her up and down a few times while she squealed happily, making him smile a little.

It had been too long since he had held the lil' Asskicker and he almost felt a little bad for having neglected her the way he had. Since the day at the hospital all those months ago, he could count on one hand the times that he had actually held the little girl, normally leaving the task to either Carl, Carol, Tyreese or Rick. Michonne too had carried her around a fair share, and it seemed like Judith had taken a particular liking to the strong woman. Now, Daryl felt a bit calmer in his mind. Beth was back and things in his life, in this fucked up world, seemed to be falling into place again, if one didn't count the horrible events of yesterday.

Although, even that day had ended on a good note, he thought, when he recalled the way Beth's head had fit so nicely between his shoulder and the car seat.

“Do you guys know if Noah's awake yet?” Beth then asked. Daryl looked up at her again automatically, and he cursed himself for doing so when he saw that her eyes were still trained on him. She was watching him and Judith interacting and she actually _smiled_ a full-blown smile when Judith reached up and yanked at his hair. He muttered a low curse, trying to pry the girl's fingers from his hair when Beth reached down, gently helping him free from Judith's grip.

“She's so sweet,” Beth said, brushing Judith's cheek with her finger before taking a small step back again. Daryl yet again found that he couldn't remove his eyes from her. “So? Have any of you seen Noah around?” she repeated.

“He woke up early,” Carl informed her. “I think he might have gone down to the pits to see if everything was fine there.”

“He went by himself?” Beth frowned, turning her eyes away from Daryl, looking at Carl instead.

Daryl detected concern in her tone and he turned back to look at Judith who was once reaching for his hear, but he pulled back just before she could get a hold of it. He understood that Beth was worried about Noah going out all on his own, because he was her friend.

That was all they were, right?

He wasn't the least bit jealous, was he? Because he shouldn't be...right? He had no right to be, after all. Yet, there was an uncomfortable feeling in his gut; like someone had just punched him ten times in a row. But that couldn't be jealousy, could it? He knew that he cared for Beth, _a lot._ Although he didn't know whether she felt the same for him and why should she? All he had done so far was put her in danger and almost get her killed. If he hadn't been teasing her at that mall yesterday, maybe she would have payed attention and then she wouldn't have been caught and almost raped–

“ _Damn it,_ ” he exclaimed when Judith grabbed his hair and pulled again, this time a lot harder than before.

Maggie reached for the little girl who was gurgling and giggling contently. The older Greene sister laughed when she watched Daryl and even Carl and Beth chuckled. Daryl was pretty sure his face had gone red, which only made him want to disappear somewhere, maybe even go on a hunting trip for ten days until the whole ordeal had been forgotten.

“Let me take her,” Maggie said, reaching for Judith. Daryl stood up instead and shook his head.

“Nah, I'll take her to Rick's room,” he said before turning to Beth. “Ya don't gotta worry 'bout Noah,” he told her. “Kid can take care of himself out there, but he ain't alone. Carol's with him.”

“Why are you looking for him anyway?” Maggie then asked. She had clearly decided to ignore the way Daryl hadn't let her hold Judith.

“I had something to ask him,” Beth shrugged.

“Something I need to know about?” Maggie wondered.

“Not right now,” Beth replied. She crossed her arms over her chest, taking on an almost defensive posture. Daryl refrained from frowning at her again. “Well, I'll see you guys later then. I need to find Noah,” she said before waving lightly. Before she turned away completely though, she met Daryl's eyes once again and he could see that there was something bothering her.

_ 'Of course somethin's botherin' her! _ ' Merle exclaimed in his mind.  _'Blondie almost got raped for fuck's sake!'_

He ignored his brother's ranting in his mind as Beth finally moved her eyes away from his. It might have all occurred in less than a second, but it had felt almost as if time had slowed down a bit when their eyes had met.

Daryl muttered something to Maggie and Carl, about taking Judith inside so that Michonne could bathe her because Carl got her all dirty and stepped inside, hating the fact that his brother's voice kept taunting him about being jealous about Beth looking for Noah.

* * *

Beth found Noah by the pits, just like Carl had said. As Daryl had told her, he wasn't alone; Carol was standing next to him as they looked down into the pits, arms on their hips. When Beth approached, she saw that there was a lone walker inside the pit, but the two of them had clearly already taken it out.

“We've been on this farm for over two months,” Carol said, “and this is one of _five_ walkers we've seen so far, if one doesn't count the ones that attacked you and Daryl in the woods.” The older woman had been looking at Beth as she had spoken.

“You see many biters around when it was just you and Morgan?” Noah asked and Beth shook her head.

“No,” she admitted, but she couldn't help but think about how strange it actually was.

Those months that she and Morgan had been on the road, they had seen plenty of walkers. As they had moved further South though, the amount of walkers had lessened and even though she didn't know just where this farm was, in which state, she knew that they had only been forced to take care of a couple of walkers since they had arrived there.

Her mind went to those men in the store for a moment and she wondered briefly if they could have had something to do with it. They had mentioned a 'boss' of some sort and they had seemed rather equipped to protect themselves against the geeks; no matter how easily they had been taken out by Beth and her group.

With the memory of what had happened yesterday, her mind flashed with images of that police officer again. She suppressed a shudder when she recalled a green lollipop being forced past her pursed lips and she shut her eyes tightly, willing the horrible feeling in her gut away.

“Noah, would you mind taking a small walk with me?” she blurted out.

Noah and Carol looked at each other before looking at Beth, both having a worried expression on their face. Beth knew that everyone had heard what had happened the day before and she understood their concern.

“Everything okay, Beth?” Carol asked and Beth nodded.

“Yeah, I just need to clear some things up,” she said, trying to smile a bit but she was sure it only came out as a grimace.

“Okay, sure,” Noah said. “Carol?” he asked the older woman who nodded.

“I'll go back to the house and ask Tyreese or someone to deal with this body,” Carol said. She gently squeezed Beth's shoulder before leaning over, pressing a small kiss to Beth's cheek. “I'll see you later,” she smiled and walked away.

Beth looked over at Noah, who motioned for her to lead the way and they began walking.

She was sure a good couple of minutes had passed since they had started walking in silence, but she simply didn't know where to begin. Noah was walking a couple of feet behind her and Beth tried desperately to find the words she wanted to say. She didn't want him to know about the police officer yet, mostly because she didn't know just how much he knew about the man.

Behind her, she heard Noah stop walking as he sighed deeply. She stopped too, but didn't turn around just yet. Instead, she looked around a bit under the pretense of checking out the perimeter.

“Everything okay, Beth?” Noah asked, breaking the silence.

“I remembered something,” Beth told him, turning around slowly to face him. “I remembered _you_ , falling down some kind of elevator shaft... And then darkness and gunshots and ringing in my ears.” She watched him carefully for any kind of reaction.

And she got it.

Beth looked into Noah's eyes but he shifted his gaze to the side instead of facing her. She could see how quickly his shoulders tensed and his entire body was almost turned away from her.

“Noah?” Beth pressed. “Will you please just tell me? I remembered that and I'd like for you to fill the gaps.”

“We were at a hospital together,” he told her then, turning back to her. “That's where we met.”

“A hospital?” Beth frowned.

Noah nodded, “Yeah. We became friends there... I guess, there were a lot of bad people there and the two of us could only trust each other.”

“Where were Maggie and the others?” Beth asked. It didn't make any sense. She had been separated from her family for a while? Why hadn't anyone told her that yet?

“They came later...” Noah trailed off, shifting from one foot to the other. “You were a hero, Beth. You saved my life in that place, you helped me escape.”

“Escape...”

“Through the elevator shaft,” Noah shared. “You started shooting walkers left and right, killing them all. That must be the ringing in your ears that you mentioned. It was amazing.”

Beth looked at him, once again hesitating. Should she ask about the police officer after all? Maybe it was better to learn everything at the same time? Or perhaps it would overwhelm her, if she found out that that man had done what she suspected that he had done to her.

“You said there were bad people there...?” she asked instead, trailing off as she left the question hanging.

“Yeah,” Noah said slowly. “They were officers and they sort of ran the place. No one questioned their actions and those who didn't like it, turned their head the other way.”

“What did they do?” Beth swallowed thickly, feeling how it was getting a bit more difficult to breathe as she once again remembered the way that man had pressed his nose into the side of her neck, inhaling her scent.

“Beat old people,” Noah said. “Raped women–”

“Stop,” Beth said, holding up her hand. She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I don't need to hear any more.”

Noah frowned, “I'm sorry.”

“No, it's okay,” Beth said, looking at him again. “I just...don't need the details right now.” Then she remembered what he had said and tilted her head a bit, curiosity once again taking over. “You said that I helped you get out. Didn't I get out too?”

Once again, Noah looked uncomfortable. “You didn't get out until much later,” he mumbled. Beth suppressed the urge to narrow her eyes at him. He was keeping something from her; she could feel it in her gut.

“Okay,” she settled anyway, having learned a long time ago that there were just some things that were better left unexplained. She was certain that this conversation would be brought back up again, once she figured out how to approach Noah without actually just blurting out that she thought that she might have been raped in that hospital.

“Do you have anything else to ask?” Noah asked and Beth shook her head in reply. “Then maybe we should head back?” he suggested. Beth offered him a small smile, still deep in thoughts as they began walking back toward the farmhouse.

They were halfway there when someone stumbled out of the woods. Beth was ready, lifting the knife she always carried with her.

“It's just me,” Father Gabriel spoke, holding up his hands in surrender. He approached her and Noah slowly, almost tripping over a small branch. “Lovely day for a walk, isn't it?”

“What the hell are you doing out here?” Beth demanded, still not putting her knife away. “Are you alone?”

“I'm never alone,” the pastor told her. “God is with me everywhere I go.”

Beth stared at him blankly before her eyes narrowed. She shot him a glare, “Your God won't do you or any of us any good if you get attacked by walkers and bring them back to the farm.”

“Oh, sweet Beth,” Father Gabriel said. “You need to start believing more–”

“Shut up, will you?” Beth snapped angrily. “You're putting yourself and everyone else in danger! Don't you see that?”

“There have not been any walkers around this area for how long now?” Father Gabriel countered. “I have chosen to take that as a sign from God, that everything will be all right. We have been blessed with this wonderful place.”

“You're crazy,” Beth shook her head, sheathing her knife again as she began walking past the man. Just as she was on her way to pass him, however, the pastor took a hold of her wrist. Beth turned around and pushed at his shoulder, forcing him to release his grip on her. She knew that he hadn't meant to be threatening to her in any way, but with the day she was having, she didn't want him anywhere near her. “Don't _touch_ me,” she basically snarled at him. “You're putting us all in danger because of your beliefs. You're putting Carl and _Judith_ and everyone else in danger because you think you're invincible. Anything can happen at any time so stop being so Goddamn naive because it will get us _all_ killed!”

With those words, still fuming with anger, Beth turned back around and began walking back to the house, leaving both him and Noah behind. She knew that Noah would bring Father Gabriel with him back to the farmhouse but she just couldn't stand to be in his presence any longer. There was just something about that man that irked her and she simply didn't want to be around him more than necessary.

Beth walked around the house, to the backyard. She needed to blow off some steam and the best way of doing that was to get some target practice in. When she reached her destination though, she noticed that she wasn't the only one who had had target practice in mind.

Daryl was standing with his back toward her, crossbow raised as he fired a bolt, hitting the bulls-eye. She knew that he was aware of the fact that she was there, because there was just something about the way that he moved as he walked toward the tree without turning around. He was a hunter, for crying out loud! Of course he would know that she was there, since he was always aware of his surroundings. She took a few steps and then leaned back against the wall, looking at him as he took out the bolt and looked at it for any damages.

“Everythin' go okay with Noah?” he asked, his voice a little rougher than usual.

“Yeah,” she replied. He glanced over at her, brushing his too long hair out of his eyes. She could tell that he wanted to ask something else, but there was something holding him back once again. Did he know that she had remembered something? Was it possible that he actually knew that she had gone to Noah to ask the younger man about her memories that he had been a part of?

“Why do you look pissed off then?” Daryl finally asked, turning to face her fully as he walked toward her. She could see that he was still being cautious and that he clearly hadn't asked what he had originally wanted to ask.

“Father Gabriel,” Beth almost growled.

Daryl quirked an eyebrow at her, “What the hell has he done now?”

Beth pushed away from the wall, taking a few steps closer to Daryl. “He's walkin' around the woods as if there aren't any walkers around whatsoever!” she told him, throwing her hands up in the air out of sheer frustration. “He's gonna get himself killed one day, and who knows who else he'll put in danger until then. It pisses me off to know that no one is telling him to just stay put if he isn't gonna help keep us all safe.”

“Mhm...” Daryl hummed in agreement.

“Aren't you gonna say anythin'?” Beth frowned at him. “Don't you have an opinion?”

“It's the same as yours,” Daryl told her gruffly. “I haven't trusted that man since he endangered the lil' Asskicker a couple of months back, before–” he cut himself off abruptly, shaking his head.

Beth eyed him curiously again. What had he been about to say? Had he been about to slip up and tell her something that was related to her?

And had Father Gabriel already put Judith in danger once before? When had that happened?

Briefly, her mind went to earlier today, when she had met up with Daryl and Maggie on the porch. She had seen the way Daryl had held little Judith and she couldn't help but think about how clear it was that the man cared for her, almost as if she was his blood. It was no secret either that Daryl and Rick referred to each other as 'brother' so maybe, in a way, Daryl was Judith's uncle. She had no doubt that he cared about Judith and she was sure that Rick would trust Daryl with keeping both his kids safe, if it was necessary.

“Then why doesn't Rick or someone tell him to stay inside? He's clearly not in his right mind,” Beth pointed out. “Why don't you say anythin' to him?”

“I'll keep an eye on him too, if it makes ya feel better,” Daryl told her, “but I sure as hell ain't gonna start making the decisions for this group.”

“Even if he's endangering us all?” Beth challenged, crossing her arms across her chest. Daryl frowned and sighed before looking away.

“I'll see what I can do,” he finally agreed. “I'll bring it up to Rick, but if he doesn't do anythin' 'bout it, I ain't gonna either.”

“Daryl, something needs to be done,” Beth sighed, rubbing her temple. “If you agree with me, then why don't we just–”

“I don't wanna start any arguments in the group, Beth,” Daryl interrupted her. “We've been safe so far an' I promise I'll do my best to keep ya safe for however long it's necessary.”

Beth didn't even flinch as his hand came to rest on her shoulder, but her breath did hitch a bit when she realized that he was promising to keep _her_ safe, specifically. What did he mean by that?

A part of her wanted to tell him that she didn't need anyone's protection, just as she had proven yesterday in that mall. Then again, she remembered how safe she had felt when Daryl had pulled her into his arms and she couldn't bring herself to say anything.

She could feel the warmth of Daryl's hand, even though it was only touching the hoodie she was wearing. His thumb seemed to brush lightly against her shoulder and as she looked down, to hide the flush on her face that she was sure was there, she knew that Daryl realized what he was doing. He pulled his hand away from her slowly though, and she wondered just how many more times they would be caught off guard like this; touching each other in comforting ways that seemed so familiar even though she held no memory of ever having been near him before.

Her eyes settled on his crossbow then and she closed her eyes momentarily as her vision got a bit blurry.

“ _Will you teach me then?”_

“ _Hm?”_

“ _The crossbow? Will you teach me how to use it?”_

_ A beat passed and she took a small breath, readying herself for rejection. _

“ _Sure.”_

Beth opened her eyes and turned to look at Daryl so quickly that she got a bit dizzy. Daryl let go of his crossbow and reached for her with both his hands, resting them on her upper arms as she stumbled forward, blinking a few times.

“You okay?” he asked, worry shining through. He hadn't been quick enough to hide it this time.

Had that been a memory too? She had recognized Daryl's voice this time, and even though it had only been voices and a feeling in her gut, she knew that it _must have been_ a memory.

She had asked Daryl to teach her how to use the crossbow once, and he had agreed to do so. Was that why she had been such a natural at aiming? What else had he taught her? And if he truly had taught her, then it confirmed her thoughts that the two of them had at least been friends in some way! She knew that Daryl never let anyone else touch his crossbow and if he really had gotten around to teaching her, then that must mean that he had once trusted her more than he was letting on.

“I'm fine,” Beth said quickly, pulling away from his grip. She was so confused at the moment that her head was pounding because of her trying to figure out what all her jumbled up memories meant. This new one with Daryl was at least a little more positive than the one with the police officer, that she still wasn't able to get out of her mind.

“I think I just need to rest a bit,” she told him, offering him a small smile. “I'll leave you to your crossbow training and see you later, at dinner. Okay?”

Daryl nodded slowly, but he was still looking at her worriedly. “At dinner,” he confirmed.

She waved at him lightly before making her way into the house through the back door, feeling his eyes trained on her the entire time.

* * *

Beth had told Morgan that she was having one of her headaches again and then gone to her room. She had been there the entire day but she hadn't been able to sleep at all. Instead, she had just laid there, looking up at the ceiling, thinking about the memories she had gotten back and trying to fit them into a chronological order.

She didn't dare asking about the police officer yet, mostly because she was sure that she wouldn't like the answer. If she really had been raped by him, she didn't want to know because she wouldn't want to live with those memories for the rest of her life. On the other hand though, not knowing was eating her up from the inside. She knew that she would inevitably have to ask Noah about it eventually but until then, she didn't even want to think about it.

Her mind then went to the brief conversation she had remembered in the backyard when she and Daryl had been talking. When exactly had _that_ occurred? She wanted to know that too but she was too scared to ask Daryl because she knew that he would probably try to deny it. If she asked someone else, they might not even know what to tell her and then _they_ would surely go to Daryl, which would only embarrass the hunter.

Beth was caught in some kind of limbo; torn between wanting to know and not daring to ask.

So instead, she had gone to dinner and eaten with the rest of the group, pretending that everything was fine. She had had a good laugh with Glenn, who was complaining about being sore but she was glad that he was still able to joke about having some kind of gym-equipment moved to the barn on the farmland. Honestly, she wouldn't mind having a place where they could actually practice and train safely, without having to worry about shooting someone by accident. The backyard area wasn't exactly the biggest so she was on board with them fixing up the old barn. Besides, they probably needed a new project now that they had piled up all the wood they wood need for the winter and Daryl, Eugene and Tyreese were working on that generator whenever they had time.

Daryl had been quiet for most of the dinner, and Beth wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that instead of sitting at her usual place beside Morgan and Maggie, she had sat down next to him. It was one thing to keep herself from asking him about the memory she had had, and it was another to keep the distance between them. She was comfortable around him and his words earlier that day about keeping her safe had meant more to her than she ever would have imagined. Morgan had been having her back all the time while they had been alone and when Daryl had spoken those words, it had reminded her of a conversation she and Morgan had had once when they had been caught in a snow storm in an old gas-station.

Morgan had promised her then too that he would keep her safe and that he wouldn't abandon her and he had been keeping that promise since that day. Having someone other than him, Daryl specifically, who kept insisting on never having known her very well, promise her the same... Well, it just meant  _something_ to her.

She wanted to show Daryl that she was fine with them being closer; that she was fine with people seeing that they were  _friends_ at least. He would hopefully learn as time passed that it didn't matter if he touched her shoulder if he wanted to bring her comfort and that she didn't mind him hugging her. His touch grounded her in a way that only Morgan's words had been able to do for months. It was surprising, yes, but at the same time, it just made so much sense to her that she just didn't even know how to explain it.

When Daryl stood up and mumbled something about going to bed earlier, she didn't bother saying anything, even though she  greatly missed his presence when he'd left.  No more than half an hour later, she had excused herself as well, still feeling some of the remnants of her headache as well as being a little sore in her throat. The others in the group though seemed to be enjoying the easy conversation they were having so she just kissed Morgan's cheek and waved at the rest of them before walking up the stairs.

Deep in mind as she was, she nearly missed the fact that Daryl's bedroom door was slightly ajar. She stopped walking and bit her lip. He had never left his door ajar before and she couldn't help but wonder if it was some kind of invitation from his side.

Not to anything  _inappropriate_ of course, but maybe just to talk or something?

She couldn't help herself when she walked a bit closer, pushing at the door just a little so that she could peek inside. Daryl was laying in his back with both of his hands behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling. She pushed the door open a bit more and his eyes flickered over to where she was, but he didn't move even after his eyes connected with hers.

Sighing, she opened the door fully and took a tiny step into the room. When he didn't say anything to protest, she finally walked in and closed the door behind her before sitting down on the chair in the corner, leaving some space between them.

For a moment, they both looked at each other, challenging the other to be the first one to speak. If there was anything she had learned so far about Daryl Dixon, it was that he was a stubborn man. She knew that there was no way in hell that he would actually be the first one to speak tonight, especially since she had been the one who had come to him.

“I'm sorry if I'm botherin' you,” she said, her voice low because she didn't want to strain her throat any more and risk loosing her voice altogether for a few days.

“Ya ain't botherin' me,” Daryl retorted. He remained laying on the bad though and she was almost one hundred per cent sure that he was trying to prove to both her and himself that he could be comfortable with having her around. “Ya need anythin'?”

“I wanted to–” she cut herself off and shook her head lightly. “It's stupid.”

“Ain't sure there's anythin' stupid 'bout you, Beth,” he muttered in a barely audible tone, but she had heard him clear as day. She wasn't sure if he had meant for her to hear him, so she wasn't going to ask him about the words he had said, that she was going to consider a compliment for now and not think too deeply about. She had enough things to think about as it was.

“I wanted to ask you if you could take my mind off of things,” she said. When she saw how Daryl's mouth dropped open a bit and panic seemed to flare up inside of his eyes, she quickly realized how bad her choice of words had been. “By telling me another story, I mean,” she clarified quickly, hoping that she wasn't blushing as her own mind went right to those inappropriate places that she was trying to avoid thinking about.

“Another story, huh?” Daryl asked, as he pushed himself up in a sitting position. He watched her and she nodded her head in confirmation. “Ya sure? I don' really understand why ya think it's so fun to hear 'bout stuff from the past...”

“I don't know either,” Beth confessed, noticing how he didn't object to the idea of telling her something.

“Fine then,” he said, resting his elbows on his knees as he tried to think of something to say. She wanted to hear something crazy about him that she wouldn't have ever expected to hear and when she told him as much, he actually chuckled. “Somethin' crazy? Alright, I s'pose I might have a story like that.”

“Tell me, please?” Beth said, offering him a small smile of encouragement.

“Once, a crazy chick got me drunk on moonshine,” he began, looking up at her, meeting her eyes.

“Was this before or after the Outbreak?” Beth wondered.

“After,” Daryl shared and Beth couldn't help but laugh a bit. It was a funny thought: Daryl Dixon, getting drunk during the apocalypse with some girl after the dead started walking and danger lured around every corner.

“The girl, uh, talked me into playing some drinkin' game,” he continued, playing with a tear in his jeans. “Then she convinced me to burn down a cabin.”

“You burned down a _cabin_?” Beth asked, mouth dropping open in surprise.

“More of a shack than a cabin actually,” he shrugged. “Didn't have more than one big room and that was where we found the moonshine.”

“Wait a second,” Beth said, holding up her hand to stop him from talking. “So you and some girl, found a shack somewhere in the woods, after the Outbreak, got piss-drunk and then burned the whole place down?”

“Maybe not piss-drunk, but yeah,” Daryl nodded.

Beth covered her mouth with her hand to keep herself from laughing out loud. She didn't want anyone from downstairs to hear her, even though she knew that the isolation in the house was good enough so that the sound wouldn't carry that far unless she started screaming or something...which she wasn't planning on doing.

“And she weren't just _some_ girl,” Daryl added, which startled Beth. She looked at him then and noticed the slightly pained expression on his face. She instantly regretted asking him to tell her another story and she realized that the girl he was talking about, might be the same girl he had told her about that night on the porch.

She bit her tongue and swallowed, not knowing what else to add to his comment. His memory that had seemed like a good thing a moment ago had suddenly become a sad one when she thought about the sadness that she had seen in him that night on the porch. He had obviously cared a lot about this girl and here she was, laughing stupidly at his memories.

“I'm sorry,” she said without thinking.

“Ain't nothin' to be sorry 'bout,” he said. “Feels kinda good to share the story with someone...”

“You mean no one in the group knows about this?” Beth frowned and Daryl shook his head. “You've never told anyone?”

“Nah,” Daryl drawled. “It was s'posed to be between me an'... _her._ ”

“Then why do you keep telling me about her?” Beth wondered.

She could see the hesitation in his eyes and he shrugged, “Guess you're just easier to talk to than I woulda imagined.”

Beth stood from the chair and walked closer to him. This time, when she sat down on the bed next to him and lightly touched his arm, he didn't pull back and he didn't flinch. She decided to take it as a good sign and took the decision to try her luck by leaning her head lightly against his shoulder. When her forehead touched his skin, she heard him exhale, but he didn't move away from her touch and he didn't say anything else. Her fingers were still clutching his arm and he actually surprised her by resting his hand over hers and squeezing lightly.

Her mind once again filled with the memories she had been trying to get sorted in her mind and she wanted them to go away, at least for a little while longer. She asked him to tell her about the shack and how it had felt to burn it down and she failed to contain her smile when he obliged and continued to tell her the story, with a bit more details.

He never went into much detail about the girl though, although he described the cabin so well that when she closed her eyes, she could almost see it burning in front of her eyes, as well as Daryl, next to her, flipping both the burning shack and the past that it symbolized, off. She wished that she could have been there with him then; that she too could have burned down her own past and just started over fresh. Then again, she supposed that that was exactly what she had done, in a way, when she had lost her memories.

When Daryl had finished telling the story, they both sat in silence for a while longer. Beth was enjoying having him close to her because she got that comfort that she had been looking for without really knowing when she had sought him out. While she wanted to ask him why he had left the door open, since she knew that he was aware of the fact that he and she were the only ones who came this far down the hallway, she just couldn't bring herself to ask him. Instead, when she finally pulled her head away from his shoulder and looked up into his blue eyes that were boring down into hers, she just  _knew_ that he too had needed this moment.

“Daryl,” she whispered, knowing that she still wasn't brave enough to just ask him what it was that he was keeping from her. She too was keeping things from him, after all. She thought back to the memory of that cop and then that man in the mall, who had caught her off guard. 

She cleared her throat, forcing herself to look away from Daryl. “I don't wanna be a victim, Daryl,” she told him, her voice hoarser than it had been earlier.

His hand was still resting over hers and she felt his grip tighten a bit. She wondered just how much he understood from her admission, because after all, he was a very perceptive man. “Ya ain't gonna be a victim,” he told her confidently.

“I was caught off guard yesterday,” she admitted bitterly. “I've been getting soft and I... I think I need to start training again.” She looked at him again, but he kept his mouth shut. “Could you maybe train with me? Teach me things, I mean?”

H er question hung in the air for a bit and she was afraid that he might actually reject her. Then, he offered her a curt nod, agreeing to it.

“Ya sure this is just 'bout yesterday?” he asked her then, and she just  _ knew  _ that he could sense that there was more to the story, just like he had earlier in the backyard.

“Yes,” she lied, even though she knew that he wouldn't believe her.

“Okay,” he finally said, not looking the least convinced but at least he had agreed to help train her again. Beth stood from his bed and he let go of her hand. They looked at each other for another moment and she noticed that he seemed to be in deep thought once again.

“Good night, Daryl,” she said.

He blinked a few times, “G'night, Beth.”

She walked to the door, turning back one last time before she walked out, offering him a small smile again, that he returned, but only lightly.  Nevertheless, it made her feel a bit better and when she finally laid down in her bed and closed her eyes, sleep overtook her and she had a dreamless night for the first time, in a long, long time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another story! Yay! Or at least that's the way I felt about it! Do tell me what you thought! :)
> 
> Oh, and I need to say that since I have an exam this Friday, which means that I'll have to study a lot this week, I might not be able to write much this week. However, I do hope that I'll be able to post again on Sunday next week. Until then, please tell me what you thought of this chapter as well as what has been your favorite thing about this story so far and what you look forward to seeing in the future! :)
> 
> And remember, no spoilers about the new episode in the reviews since I won't be able to watch it until tomorrow! Keep track of what I do on twitter or tumblr and then you'll know when I've watched the episode. After I've watched it, you can feel free to message me if you need someone to talk about. Also, to my fellow Team Delusional members, whatever happens in this episode tonight, don't expect to see Beth actually coming back. I am just expecting a sign of sorts that will just be so obvious that it will get people wondering and talking, but of course, if we do physically get to see Beth, then I'll be happy too.
> 
> Okay, sorry for rambling, just don't give up hope, okay? I know that I won't! :)
> 
> Have a nice week everyone! Until next time! xx


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maggie makes an insinuation which ticks Daryl off. Unfortunately, Beth overhears some of the conversation, which angers her when she learns a part of a truth that everyone has been keeping from her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thank you so much for the wonderful support I've gotten so far! You people are amazing and I love each and every one of you! I've been sick this entire weekend and I really didn't even think that I would be able to finish this chapter in time, but I did it. I'm sorry if there are any mistakes in here, since I haven't had time to read through it entirely, but I still hope it's okay.
> 
> And I just wanted to say that I've decided to incorporate Daryl's self-inflicted burn mark in this story, so it's in here now, which I really hope you guys won't mind. I'm still not gonna follow the canon story of the show, since I have my own plan for this fic and once again, I hope you're okay with that.
> 
> Now, without wasting any more of your time: prepare for ANGST!
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 14

The wind had picked up a bit over the last couple of days. Leaves were swirling all around the farm and it was becoming colder and colder every night that passed. Daryl squinted as he looked up at the sky, noting the clouds that barely let the sun shine through. He looked down again and kicked the dirt as he looked toward the farmhouse, wondering what was taking Beth so long.

After having agreed to train with her, the two of them had finally gotten around to plan their first session. It had actually been Beth who had brought it up when she had practically ambushed him downstairs in the basement, where he was still working on that damned generator, and asked him if they would be able to get some crossbow practice in as well. Daryl had merely looked at her and grunted, which she had taken as a 'yes' and then she had proceeded to tell him that they should try to get in some training as early as possible the next day.

He was well aware of the fact that both Tyreese and Eugene had looked at them curiously, and it wouldn't surprise him if the fake scientist had gone and blabbered all over the house about his and Beth's exchange. The idea of people talking about him and Beth behind their backs made him uneasy. He had never enjoyed being the talk of the town, so to speak, and he knew that if his growing feelings for the young blonde ever came out, he would without a doubt have people in their group gossiping about them.

Shifting around on his feet, he looked toward the farmhouse again, but there was still no sign of Beth. He was almost tempted to just go there and waltz into her room and pull her out of bed. Then again, he wasn't sure it was a very smart idea to have him anywhere near Beth's bedroom, or Beth's bed and at times, he still questioned whether he was making the right decision allowing himself to be close to her.

His thumb brushed against the mark on his left hand, digging into the rough, burned skin that had been left behind after a cigarette he had smoked in hopes of gathering his mind after he had lost Beth. Those first couple of weeks after they had buried her had been a hell he had never been able to imagine himself being in. They had lost people before: Sophia, Dale, T-Dog, Lori, _Merle_ and so many more that he had actually stopped thinking about the long list of loved ones lost. Yet, Beth's death had been the one that had finally made him crumble.

He  remembered how they had been walking for days, out of food, running low on water. Everyone in the group seemed to have understood that there was more to his grief than he was letting on; more to his relationship with Beth than he would ever dare to admit. Rick and Carol had both tried to coax it out of him, discrete as they were, but he had persisted on not feeling  _anything_ .

When he had finally gone off to be alone, to clear his mind at least a little, he had smoked a cigarette and thought about how he had lowered Beth's lifeless body into the casket, making sure that she looked like she was merely asleep before finally lowering her into the ground.  That had been the only thing circling in his mind and the numbness that his mind had forced him into, to protect his heart, had crashed in. He recalled wondering, whether it would hurt if he just burned, like he and Beth had burned down his past and the person he had been before the world had ended.

So he had pressed that lit cigarette against his hand and watched numbly as his skin sizzled and the smell of burning flesh filled his nostrils. When he had pulled the cigarette away, he had touched that little part of burned skin, and then, he had remembered.

_'I sure as hell never cut my wrist looking for attention!'_

The memory of how he had yelled at her; how he had listed everything he had never done, never gotten, never had. He remembered the look on her face when he had yelled that particular accusation at her and that moment, that memory, was what finally made the numbness fall away.

He had cried and he had grieved and since that second, his grief hadn't lessened for even a second during the next months that they had spent on the road.

If the others in the group noticed the burn mark, they sure as hell never mentioned it to him. But it was after that that Carol had tasked Noah to keep an eye on him and Daryl had always suspected that it was because of his burn.

“Hey...”

Daryl jumped when someone touched his arm and turned around, only to see a very smug looking Beth looking at him.

“Hi,” he muttered, feeling his face heat up because of being caught off guard by her.

Beth giggled lightly, her intense blue eyes glinting mischievously, “Did I scare you?”

“I ain't scared of nothin',” he huffed, shaking his head at her before eying her outfit. “That's what you're gonna wear during' training'?” he couldn't help but ask.

Beth looked down at her ripped skinny-jeans and long-sleeved loose shirt before shrugging. “Figured that if I ever got attacked again, my attacker wouldn't wait 'til I changed into somethin' more comfortable,” she told him.

He couldn't argue with that so he merely nodded. “Ya wanna start with hand-to-hand?” he asked her. “I ain't a professional, but I've been in my fair share of bar fights thanks to Merle.”

“Merle...?” Beth frowned.

Daryl shifted on his feet. “My brother,” he told her.

Beth's lips pressed together and she nodded curtly, clearly not having to ask where his brother was today because she seemed to understand it perfectly fine.  Then, her lips parted as her eyes glazed over a bit.

“He didn't by any chance have, like, a metal hand or somethin'?” she asked him, her voice low as she met his eyes.

Daryl stared at her, at first not understanding what she meant. Then, he remembered that Merle had indeed lost his hand and replaced it with a knife. “Ya remembered  _Merle_ ?” Daryl snorted before he could stop himself. “Damn, outta all the things... Of course ya remembered that asshole...” he muttered under his breath.

“I...” Beth began, but then trailed off, shaking her head. “Sorry, it was just an image that sort of _flashed_ in my mind or somethin', when you said his name.”

“So ya remember what he looked like then?” Daryl wondered, still not fully understanding how Beth's brain worked when it came to her memories. Out of all the things it could have let her remember, she had actually recognized how Merle looked.

_'Well, I'll be damned,'_ Merle whistled in Daryl's mind.  _ 'Seems like I made a bigger impression than you ever did, lil' brother!' _

“Yeah,” Beth nodded. “I guess I do...”

Daryl ignored Merle that was laughing over his misery and cleared his throat. “Maybe we should start trainin' now,” he suggested.

“Sure,” Beth replied, looking just as glad as he felt about letting the conversation go. “I just gotta stretch a bit.”

She took a couple of steps back and pushed her arms up in the air, stretching her back before bending down over her middle, touching her toes. Daryl felt as his mouth dropped open a bit, but he wasn't able to help it at all as Beth bent her knees a few times before once again stretching upwards, her shirt lifting, revealing the pale skin of her stomach as she did. He swallowed thickly, forcing his mouth closed as he tried to keep out the  _ very _ inappropriate images that filled his mind when he realized just how flexible Beth seemed to be.

At first, he had only questioned his reason and wondered what it was that had actually compelled him to say yes to Beth about training with her. Then, Beth had rolled her shoulders, pushing her arms back as her chest pressed forward and she had actually  _ shot him a glance _ over her shoulder, blinking  _ way too  _ innocently at him.

Wait a minute.

Was she doing that on  _ purpose? _

Daryl resisted the urge to actually shake his head, but he couldn't bring himself to look away from her.  He must have imagined it, he figured, but then, she went on and glanced at him again and he noticed just the hint of smirk on her lips before she turned her back to him again.

He narrowed his eyes at her, finally seeing that Beth was indeed teasing him. Why she was doing it was a question he had no answer to, but it was a bit frightening to think that she might actually be aware of the effect she had on him.

Before he could even question himself, he took two big strides forward and caught her wrists in a tight grip, pulling them down as he pinned her arms to her body by wrapping his arm around her stomach to keep her in place, pushing her back against his chest. She struggled for a moment in his grip, but couldn't move, clearly having been caught off guard.

“Daryl!” Beth squeaked. “What the hell?”

He pushed her away from him, releasing her from his grip before she could squirm too much against him.

She swirled around to face him, “What the hell was  _ that _ ?”

“Did ya think your attacker would wait for you to stretch it out?” he raised an eyebrow at her, crossing his arms over his chest.

Beth huffed, “We're  _ trainin' _ , Daryl.”

“An' we're gonna make it as realistic as possible,” he informed her, beckoning her forward with his hand. “Let's see what ya got,  _ Greene _ .”

* * *

_ Greene _ .

Daryl Dixon had just referred to her by her last name and she had  _ never  _ wanted to beat someone in a fight as badly as she wanted then.

The smug smirk on his face told her that he had somehow caught on to what she had been doing, stretching and sending him glances as she bent over suggestively. She hadn't even understood what had come over her, but the idea of teasing Daryl today had just crossed her mind last night when she had been thinking about that moment they had shared in his room a couple of nights ago as well as the hammering feeling she got in her chest whenever he was around her.

She figured that even though he might not know what effect he had on her, he too needed to suffer a bit and since Maggie and Eugene had both called her pretty, she could try and see if she had some kind of effect on Daryl.

Now, half an hour later, she was already regretting her decision.

Daryl was clearly more observant than she had thought and he had caught on to what she had been doing and turned the tables on her completely. He had decided that their training today wouldn't consist of too much hand-to-hand combat, but rather him holding her in a tight grip while she tried to get away from him. So far, he had shown her a pretty basic move where he just grabbed her wrists and pulled her close while she tried to get away, and the close proximity hadn't exactly bothered her. She hadn't even thought about it until he spun her around and locked his arm around her throat, like the man in the mall had done when he had grabbed her.

“Try an' get outta my grip,” he had said into her ear, his voice quiet, almost like a whisper. “If ya fail, I'll show ya how to do it.” His husky voice had sent shivers down her spine, straight to her core and she had swallowed tightly before she began trying to get out of his grip.

She struggled against his grip, but it was of no use. Every time she got inch away from him, he pulled her back, tightening his grip around her, but not enough to actually hurt her.

“Ya gotta get my balance off,” he instructed. “Hook ya leg around mine an' push me back with ya elbow to knock me off my feet.”

Beth rolled her eyes, attempting the move he explained but it was of no use. “Maybe if you weren't prepared for my counter attack,” Beth groaned. Suddenly, Daryl released her from his grip and pushed her lightly away from him. She turned around and frowned at him, wondering what had suddenly come over him, but he was glaring at the ground, avoiding her eyes at all costs.

“We should take a break,” he told her, kicking the ground. Beth narrowed her eyes before turning to look toward the house. She saw the reason for his sudden awkwardness when she spotted Maggie, Glenn, Tara and Rosita approaching them. She looked back at Daryl, who had picked up his bow and seemed way too interested in it at the moment.

“Are you embarrassed to train with me in front of them?” Beth asked him bluntly, making him pause.

“I ain't embarrassed,” he replied. “Just figured ya'd need a break.”

“We've been training for half an hour!” Beth protested. “I don't need a break.” She shot him a pointed glare and she was pretty sure that he smirked at her before looking away again.

“Fine,” he finally said. “Let's keep trainin'.”

And so they did.

* * *

Daryl told Beth to punch him as hard as she could and when she did, he was actually kind of impressed with her strength. He held his hands up as she threw punch after punch at him, but when his eyes flickered to the side, where Maggie, Glenn, Tara and Rosita were sitting, he faltered for a moment and she caused him to stumble back.

Beth smirked and he shook his head at her, not saying anything when he took a couple of quick steps forward and grabbed her around the waist. She wasn't fazed at all, managing to get out of his grip just a few second later. He looked over at Maggie and the others again, who were watching them and he wondered how Beth managed to ignore their stares.

He felt Maggie's eyes settle on him and he swallowed thickly, knowing that the older Greene sibling was watching him for a particular reason.

“That's enough for today,” he told Beth, who nodded, breathing heavily.

“We should go huntin',” Beth said. “It's a perfect opportunity for me to learn how to use the crossbow.”

He glanced over at Maggie and the others, who seemed intrigued by their conversation, but he couldn't bring himself to break his promise to Beth. Instead, he nodded curtly and then looked over her attire again, “Ya should change. Wear somethin' thicker in case we don't get back 'fore night falls.”

“Okay,” Beth agreed, offering a smile which made something strange flutter in his chest, which he ignored as hard as he could. “I'll go change and I'll bring my knives too.”

“Alright,” he nodded. Beth smiled brightly at him again and then turned, running back toward the house at an impressive speed. He watched her for another moment before turning around to their audience. “What?” he bit out, raising an eyebrow at them.

“You're gonna teach Beth how to use your crossbow?” Tara asked, looking surprised.

“Yeah, so?” Daryl grunted as a reply.

“I thought your crossbow was sacred or something,” Rosita pointed out. “Thought no one was allowed to touch it.”

Daryl opened his mouth to retort, but then stopped himself, not really knowing what he _could_ say without revealing that he had already once taught Beth how to use his weapon of choice. Before he had the chance to say anything though, Maggie spoke.

“Guess Beth's special that way,” the older Greene sister said.

He shot her a look, “An' what the fuck's that s'posed to mean?”

Maggie shrugged, standing up from where she had been sitting. The other three stood up as well and Daryl didn't fail to notice how Rosita and Tara were looking at them curiously.

“Nothin',” Maggie said, not sounding very convincing.

“No, please,” Daryl glared. “Tell me what your goin' on 'bout now.”

“I'm just sayin' that it's clear that Beth's special to you,” Maggie said. “You care 'bout her.”

Daryl knew that Maggie didn't mean anything bad with it, but the way she said it, made it sound like some kind of accusation. His eyes moved to Glenn, who looked like he wanted to just leave them alone and let Maggie handle this conversation by herself, and then to Rosita and Tara, who looked as intrigued as before. He felt panic well inside of him. It felt as if there were walls surrounding him and that they were just coming closer every second that passed; he felt cornered.

“'Course I care 'bout her,” Daryl snapped, taking a step toward Maggie. She stubbornly didn't back down as he towered over her, glaring at her with such a fierceness that it would make anyone else crumble; but now Maggie Greene.

“So you admit there's somethin' goin' on?” Maggie asked.

“I ain't admittin' nothin',” he growled at her. “I'm just pointin' out that you weren't the one who went lookin' for her when she was taken!”

Maggie stared at him, “You're tryin' to tell me that I didn't care 'bout my sister bein' taken?”

“I'm tellin' ya that ya didn't exactly believe me when I told ya she was still alive!” Daryl shot at her. “Ya ran off to D.C. for some fucking cure that never even existed, with people ya never even knew!” he spewed, his blood boiling inside of him as he finally got out everything he had been keeping in for so long. He needed to change the focus from him, to Maggie, and this was the best way to do it. At the same time, he would be able to give Maggie a piece of his mind.

“Maybe we should calm down a bit,” Tara suggested, taking a step forward.

“I am _fuckin_ _'_ _calm!_ ” Daryl yelled at her, causing the young woman to jump.

“Hey, Daryl,” Glenn said, stepping forward. “No one is accusing you of anything. Just, take a breath or something.”

“Your goddamn wife is accusin' me of shit, Glenn!” Daryl said, turning to his friend. “She sure fuckin' take a look at her choices first! Maybe she can explain to us all why she never went lookin' for Beth? Maybe she can tell us why we didn't make it to that fuckin' hellhole in time an' had to watch Beth get _shot!_ ”

He was breathing heavily, but didn't move to take a step back from Maggie yet. She was looking at him, a frown etched on her face but something else burning in her eyes.

She was hurt.

_Good_ .

“Maggie?”

They all turned their heads to look at Beth who was watching them all, her mouth hanging open a bit.

“Beth,” Maggie said, taking a step away from Daryl, toward Beth, who shook her head, taking a step back.

“We were separated?” Beth asked, looking confused. “You weren't with me when I... When I _died?_ ”

“We were on our way,” Maggie began, but Beth held up her hand to stop her.

“You're tellin' me that all this time, that I've thought that my sister was by my side... That you weren't even there?” Beth questioned. “That I wasn't with you, that I had been taken and that you didn't even _look_ for me?”

“It wasn't like that,” Maggie tried, looking at Daryl then. He didn't understand what she was expecting of him; he sure as hell wasn't going to defend her choices, since he had never agreed with them.

“Just hear her out, Beth,” Glenn suggested but Beth shot him a look that shut him up.

“I don't wanna hear anyone out,” she snapped. “I've heard enough.” She turned to look at Daryl, zipping up her sweatshirt. “Let's go, Daryl.”

He picked up his crossbow without a word, looking over at Maggie who looked absolutely crestfallen.

“Beth, please don't walk away...” Maggie begged, her voice thick and her eyes filled with tears. “Please, just listen to me.”

“You mean like you walked away from me?” Beth asked her. “Like you left me behind and didn't believe in me? I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how someone can _not_ look for their family.”

With those words, Beth walked away. Daryl looked over at Glenn, who held Maggie who finally broke down in tears, sobbing against his shoulder. Her cries reminded Daryl of those first couple of weeks, where she cried constantly and Daryl actually did feel a little bad for her now. He managed to send Glenn a look, but the look on Glenn's face told him that he should just go because he had done enough as it was. Turning away from Maggie and Glenn, and Tara and Rosita who had begun retreating toward the house, he noticed that Beth was already halfway to the forest. He held his crossbow tightly as he hurried after her, half-running to reach her before she ducked into the woods.

“Hold up, Beth,” he said once he was close enough. She didn't stop though, just kept stomping ahead, breaking twigs as she went, clearly not caring about scaring away any possible game. “Beth slow down,” he tried again.

It was of no use.

“ _Please_.”

His final plea halted her and she turned around swiftly, looking at him with both anger and hurt in her eyes. She moved forward then, coming to a stop so close to him that their toes were actually touching.

“Did _anyone at all_ look for me?” she asked him. “When the hell was I even separated from you guys? _How_ was I separated from the group?”

Daryl stopped, staring down at her. She was breathing heavily, a flush on her cheeks and her intense blue eyes were boring into his, but he just couldn't bring himself to say anything. Whatever he said, it would only bring out more questions and he wasn't sure he was ready to answer  _those_ yet. Whichever way he weighted the possibilities, the conversation would somehow end with him having to tell her that it was his fault that she had been separated from them all, because he had been the one who had lost her.

So he just didn't say anything and that seemed to only agitate Beth further.

“You know what?” she asked, throwing her hands up in the air. “I don't even care anymore.”

But she clearly did.

Although Daryl still didn't say anything.

“Let's just hunt,” she sighed, looking away from him.

“Beth.” He said her name calmly and she faced him again. The hurt there made his chest ache and all he wanted to do was just pull her into his arms and hold her for however long it took to make her feel better, but he knew that he had no right in doing so.

“I'm sorry,” she said, her eyes glazing over. She blinked a couple of times and let out a humorless laugh, “I'm just so _stupid_. I don't know why I just assumed that my family was with me when I died.”

“Ya ain't dead, Beth,” he told her.

“I know,” Beth said, still fighting the tears. Usually, he would be uncomfortable with seeing anyone crying, but at this moment, he wanted nothing more than for Beth to actually allow herself to just let out her grief. “I just don't understand it, Daryl. I really don't.”

“Ya wanna talk 'bout it?” he asked her, but she shook her head.

“No,” she said, rubbing her eyes and the tears away. “I just feel... I don't know. I guess I thought that since I don't even remember her and still feel like I would throw myself between her and a walker, she would have done the same for me, before I was shot. And now, to learn that she wasn't with me, because I had been taken, and that she didn't even look for me...” Beth trailed off, staring ahead.

He just stared at her again but didn't know what to say to that. This had been the reason that they had all decided to not just blurt out things about her past in front of her, and yet again, just like with Hershel's death, Daryl had fucked up by snapping at Maggie.

“'M sorry, Beth,” he mumbled.

That made her turn to look at him again.

“Would you look for me?” she asked, her voice a whisper. “If I was taken... Would you look for me?”

“No one's takin' ya anywhere, Beth,” he told her sternly.

“But would you? Look for me?” Beth insisted, her hand coming up to rest on his arm as she stared up into his eyes, eyes not wavering. “Would you look for me, Daryl?”

“I would,” he replied. There wasn't any hesitation there as he spoke this time because he knew that she needed to hear it and he needed to say it. “I would look for ya, Beth.”

He watched as her lower lip trembled before she took another step toward him, her arms wrapping around his waist as she embraced him. His crossbow fell to the ground as his own hands moved to rest on her back.

“Thank you, Daryl,” Beth said against his chest, filling him with a warmth that he didn't even want to begin to try to understand right now.

All he knew was that he held her just a little bit tighter, allowing himself to just enjoy her embrace, knowing that they both needed it.

* * *

When they got back to the house, Maggie was waiting for them on the porch and Beth tried to walk right past her, but her sister didn't budge.

“Beth, please, just hear me out, okay?” Maggie pleaded, causing Beth to turn around and glare at her.

“What else is there to say, Maggie?” she asked. “I was lost and you never looked for me.”

Beth could feel Daryl take a small step closer to her, giving her his support without her having to ask him for it. The two of them had spent the rest of the afternoon in the woods alone, not talking and not bringing up her argument with Maggie. It had been good and for a moment, when she had managed to almost get a squirrel with Daryl's crossbow, she had forgotten about the dispute altogether.

It had felt good to hug him too and she was glad that he hadn't pulled away from her or gotten all awkward about it. The first time they had hugged, he had been the one to initiate it and afterward, he had seemed embarrassed about having reacted the way he had to her being attacked. This time had been different and Beth didn't want to read too much into it, but it had felt _good_ and she had been _happy_ in that moment.

“I didn't dare believe that you were still alive,” Maggie confessed then, bringing Beth back to the conversation she knew she probably should have, but didn't want to be a part of. “It was right after we lost dad and I thought that it would be easier to just...” Her sister shook her head and let out cry just as the door opened behind her.

Morgan stepped out, followed by Rick who looked between Maggie and Beth.

“Lil' Lady,” Morgan said, taking a step toward her. “You should calm down.”

“Why, Morgan? So that I can listen to my sister telling me how I wasn't worth looking for because she thought I couldn't _survive?_ ” Beth snapped.

“No, but because it's not doing _you_ any good yelling about it,” Morgan told her, managing to actually give her a stern look.

“Morgan...” Beth sighed, looking away from the man as she tried to gather her thoughts. She wanted to snap at them all and tell her lungs out, but she knew that in this world that they were living in right now, she couldn't; not without risking an attack from walkers.

“This isn't you, Beth,” Morgan said, stepping closer to her, putting his hand on her shoulder. His touch gave her comfort, like it had done so many times during the seven months that they had been alone. She found herself missing just having simple conversations with the man who had become like a father to her.

“There's something on your mind,” Morgan continued. “I can tell. Ever since that run, you haven't been yourself.”

It was a topic that she didn't want to bring up when everyone else was around, so she looked up at Morgan and met his eyes. The man fell silent, his lips sealing shut and a grim expression covered his face.

“Just, give your sister a chance to explain herself,” he finally said. “Or leave the past in the past and just move forward together. You have both found each other again and it shouldn't be wasted on arguing over things that you can't change.”

Maggie was still silently crying and Beth felt a little choked up too, but for another reason completely. She didn't know whether she would ever be able to let it go; to just forget that her sister hadn't looked for her when she had been separated from her. She felt as if she had been betrayed in the worst way possible because her sister hadn't _believed in her_ , which hurt her more than anything else.

But Morgan was right.

She couldn't let this revelation twist her up inside; she couldn't afford losing her judgment just because her emotions were hurt.

“I don't want to talk about it then,” Beth said, looking over at Maggie. “I don't want to know why you didn't look for me, or why you didn't believe I could still be alive somewhere. I don't want to hear your excuses either,” she told Maggie when she began to protest. “I'm willing to let this go and just move on, but don't expect things to be like they've been up until now.”

“What do you mean?” Maggie wondered, her voice still thick.

“I mean, don't expect me to just open up to you again when I know that I didn't mean enough for you to risk come looking for me,” Beth clarified. “Don't expect us to be sisters like we were. You're still my blood and I'll do anything to protect you, but I won't be expecting the same from you.”

“Beth, of course I'll protect you,” Maggie frowned. “Please, don't push me away now. Not when we've come so far–”

“I'm sorry,” Beth shook her head. “I really am, but I just can't let you in right now. I need time and I need space and then, maybe one day, I'll be able to forgive you for it too.”

“Beth, I'm so sorry,” Maggie cried, a pained expression on her face. “I'm so, so sorry.”

“You should have just told me from the start,” Beth said, not looking at either one of them as she walked inside the house. She heard her sister let out a sob behind her, but she couldn't just go back now.

She couldn't go back.

If the girl she had once been had been so weak that her sister hadn't believed her to be alive, then she didn't _want_ to go back.

And she knew, deep in her heart, that she would never be that girl, ever again.

* * *

“Hey, Maggie, calm down,” Rick said, putting his hand on Maggie's shoulder. “She'll come around eventually.”

Daryl felt Morgan's eyes on him, but he didn't dare to look up at the other man, not knowing what he would be seeing if he did. Instead, he kept his eyes focused on Maggie who was breaking down.

“Where the fuck is Glenn?” Daryl muttered under his breath, but no one had clearly heard him. Maggie let out another sob and pushed Rick away from her. She walked straight past Daryl and away from the house, her steps determined but her head hung low.

“We can't let her just walk off like that,” Rick said.

“Where's Glenn?” Daryl repeated his question, this time louder than before.

“He's resting upstairs,” Rick said. “He's still recovering from that run. The only reason he was out there today, watching you and Beth train was because he needed some fresh air.”

Daryl looked back around, only to see that Maggie was walking toward the barn that they still hadn't gotten around to repairing fully. “Damn,” he muttered. He didn't want to be Maggie's babysitter, but he did feel a bit guilty for having caused the argument in the first place; all because he didn't want anyone knowing about what he felt for Beth.

Or at least _thought_ he felt for her.

On second thought, there wasn't much doubt in his mind what he felt for her, but it was easier for himself to pretend that there was.

“I'll get her,” he grunted, strapping his crossbow over his back before walking off, ignoring the looks that Morgan and Rick were giving him.

He walked quickly, trying to catch up to Maggie before she did something stupid, like run into the woods and get herself killed by a walker. Although he highly doubted that Maggie would be that reckless.

He found her sitting on the ground, her back leaning against the wall of the barn, head buried in her hands, shoulders shaking. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to just walk away and leave her to cry out her grief because he didn't know whether he would ever be able to say something to make her feel better.

He actually wasn't sure that he wanted to make her feel better.

“Stop bein' stupid and let's go back to the house,” Daryl bit out, standing in front of her.

She continued to sob and Daryl resisted the urge to just turn around and run again. “This is all my fault,” Maggie said. “I should've just been honest with her from the beginning, like she said.” Her voice was shaky and then she finally looked up at him, eyes red-rimmed and cheeks wet.

“Ya ain't the only one keepin' things from her,” Daryl said. He took a couple of steps closer and sat down on the ground next to her, leaving a good foot or two between them.

She turned her head to the side and looked at him, but he kept his eyes focused on the grass below him, pulling at it lightly to ease his nerves.

He would make sure that they looked for cigarettes the next time they went on a run.

“I never wanted to give up on her,” Maggie said, her cries fading slowly. “I never meant to do it, but I didn't dare to hope...”

“I told ya she was alive,” Daryl said. “I told ya that she'd been taken an' ya decided to ignore that. That's on you, Maggie.”

“I know,” she sniffled, wiping her face. “I should have just listened to you, Daryl, but I didn't want to hope that she was still out there, _alone_. I didn't want to think that she was alone and _scared..._ And a part of me wanted to believe that she was _fine_ too. That she was happy _somewhere_ at least, somewhere where the walkers could get her and no one hurt her...”

Daryl bit the pad of his thumb as he brushed it against his lips, still not looking at her. He could still feel her looking at him and from the corner of his eye, he could see that she was still turned toward him. “Guess I never thought of it like that,” he admitted. “Thought ya were just givin' up on her...”

“It's easier to ignore the pain than to face it,” Maggie told him. “It was easier to pretend that she was fine... And then, when we got back to the church,” Maggie continued, another sob wrecking her body as she shook her head. “I got my hopes up and then she _died_.”

D aryl understood that, if anything. He had been hopeful too, he had touched Beth's shoulder, leading her to safety and then she had turned around and gotten herself killed, right in front of him. All that time that he and Carol had spent on the way to Atlanta...he hadn't been able to get her out of his mind.

He had probably imagined every possible scenario where he and Beth were reunited; where he would be able to tell her that she had been right– that she wasn't just another dead girl– and that she had been the one to change his mind.

“I didn't mean anythin' bad with what I said today,” Maggie said. “I just wanted you to know that I see that you and Beth are close. I guess, I always wondered... When I saw the way you acted after she died.”

“She ain't dead anymore,” he reminded her.

“I know,” Maggie nodded. “I know, but that doesn't change that those seven months still happened. We still thought she was dead and we buried her and we grieved.  _ You  _ grieved. Or, at least you did  _ something _ .”

Daryl remained quiet, not knowing what he was supposed to say. He knew that he had never really told anyone what had happened between him and Beth when they had been alone. Hell, he didn't really think anything  _ had  _ happened when they had been by themselves.

All he knew was that after he had lost her, he hadn't been able to stop crying that entire day and he hadn't been able to let go of her body. He had dug that grave and gotten that casket, risking his own life in the process because he didn't think life would be worth living without having Beth Greene there to call him out on his bullshit.

But he had kept going and it hadn't been until he had burned that mark into his hand that he had let himself cry again. He hadn't been much better than a walker up until then; walking around emotionless, just killing the damn geeks from left to right whenever he had to.

“ When Beth an' I were alone,” Daryl began, pulling up some of the grass, not daring to look over at Maggie. “Somethin' changed... I ain't good with...  _ words _ , but I know that if she hadn't been there, I probably woulda bit the dust right after the prison fell.”

“You wouldn't just have given up,” Maggie insisted.

“I would've,” Daryl said, staring ahead at the farmhouse. The sun was setting and he knew they should get back to the house.

“Daryl...”

“Just  _ don't _ ,” Daryl said, shaking his head.

They sat in silence for another few minutes and he finally realized that they didn't need to say anything else. He understood her a bit better now, her  _ guilt _ , and he hoped that what he had said would be enough for Maggie to just let the entire thing go.

Daryl didn't need anyone to ask more questions regarding his relationship with Beth. Maggie now knew at least a small part of it, the only part that he was willing to admit to anyone.

“I would've been okay with it,” Maggie said after a while. “You and Beth.”

“There ain't no me an' Beth,” Daryl retorted. “We're just... _ friends _ .”

“If that's what you think, then you're blinder than I ever was before,” Maggie told him. “I understand that you're not good with feelings, and I'm gonna stop botherin' you about it... But I just needed you to know, that if there ever was a Beth and you... I'd be fine with it.”

“ Things ain't gonna change, Maggie,” Daryl insisted. “That don't mean that I ain't gonna protect her though.”

“You telling me that, shows me exactly how much things already  _ have  _ changed,” Maggie said.

“I would've protected her back then too. At the prison,” Daryl frowned. “She was always innocent...”

“You misunderstood me, I think,” Maggie eyed him. “I meant that you actually  _ telling me _ that you're gonna keep Beth safe, no matter what... You've changed. You wouldn't have told me that before.  _ That's _ the change I was talking about.”

They left the conversation at that because Daryl wasn't going to deny it. He  _ had  _ changed a lot since Beth had gotten shot and there was no point in trying to  keep that from anyone because they had all seen it. For a while, he had gone back to being the person he had once believed himself to be and he had pulled away from everyone around him. After Rick had confronted him in that bar, where he had finally told his friend that  _ everything  _ had changed during that time he had been alone with Beth, he had finally been able to get at least a small part of himself back.

He had always been worried about what people thought of him afterward. What they thought about him and Beth... He didn't want to care, but there was no way not to.

Now, Maggie had basically given him the green light, telling him that she would be fine with him and Beth, if they ever did get together and Daryl was once again caught between elation and confusion. On one side, he was happy to know that Maggie wouldn't actually shoot him if he finally decided to act on the things he was feeling, but on the other, he didn't know if it meant that she was now expecting him to act on it.

He knew that after everything that had happened today, Beth would most likely pull back from them all. She wouldn't be able to trust them after it came out that Maggie had been pretending that everything had been fine between them before she had been shot.

Daryl knew that he had gotten a glimpse at what would happen between him and Beth when the young woman learned that he too had been lying to her about their past and he wasn't sure what to think about it. He knew that on some level, he was screwed either way. Beth's reaction today had only proved that once it came out that he had lied to her, he would most likely lose her all over again and this time, he feared, that it might be permanent.

* * *

Beth had been furiously writing in her journal when Rosita and Tara had decided that they should crash her privacy. At first, Tara had tried to defend Maggie's choices but Beth had quickly shut her up, telling her that she didn't want to hear about it anymore.

If anything, all she wanted to do was just leave it in the past, like Morgan had suggested.

Leaving it in the past didn't mean that she couldn't still be upset though and the thing that upset her the most was knowing that Maggie had  _ lied _ to her.

So when Rosita and Tara decided to change the subject into something else, Beth didn't object. Until, of course, Tara brought up Beth's relationship with Noah.

“What about me and Noah?” Beth frowned, looking at the brunette curiously.

“Oh, come on,” Tara nudged her. “There's something going on there, isn't it?”

“What? No!” Beth exclaimed, not being able to help the giggle that escaped her. It was such a ridiculous thought to her, but she understood how the others in their group might have misinterpreted their friendship for more. “Noah and I are just friends,” Beth told them.

“You sure there isn't something else going on?” Rosita asked. “I mean, he isn't exactly bad to look at.”

“Rosita,” Beth said, shooting her a look. “I'm one hundred percent sure that there's nothing going on between us. We're  _ just  _ friends.”

“I told you so!” Tara said, nudging Rosita in the side with her elbow.

“Wait, have the two of you been discussing me and Noah behind our backs?” Beth frowned.

“Oh, no,” Tara quickly denied. “We  got bored on the day that you guys went on the run, that we sort of started imagining who would pair up with who to repopulate the Earth.”

“And you thought of me and Noah?” Beth couldn't help but laugh at that. She tried to tell herself that she wasn't merely laughing because she was trying to cover up the fact that every time someone brought up the run that had been a major failure, she got that awful feeling inside of her when she remembered that officer in the hospital that she and Noah had been in.

“ Well, she did,” Rosita said, pointing at Tara.

“I totally would have wanted you for myself first though,” Tara admitted, making Beth laugh again, this time genuinely at their silliness. She almost felt normal again.

“Oh? And who was your choice for me then?” Beth challenged Rosita.

“Daryl.”

Beth stopped laughing almost instantly and her smile wavered as she felt her cheeks heat up. “Daryl?” she asked.

“Yeah, Daryl Dixon,” Rosita repeated. “Hunter extraordinaire, kind of has some anger issues that he probably should deal with at some point.”

“Why would you...? Me and Daryl?” Beth scoffed. “That's...”

She stopped talking when she realized that she didn't know what to say.  Instead, she stared blankly at both Tara and Rosita, blinking a couple of times as she tried to gather her thoughts.

“ You can't tell me there's absolutely nothing going on  _ there _ at least,” Rosita insisted. “Not that it's any of our business, of course... But if you ever want to talk about it...” She finished her sentence off with a shrug, giving her silent support.

“I... I don't know,” Beth finally said. “I guess, there has always been this kind of  _ draw  _ between us... At least on my part.”

“A 'draw'?” Tara wondered, looking intrigued. “Care to elaborate?”

“I think... I just feel  _ safe _ when he's around,” Beth confessed. “It feels like nothing can get to me because he's there and I know he'll protect me if I need it, but at the same time, I just  _ know  _ that he would let me take care of myself too.”

For a moment, something stirred inside of her mind as a feeling of familiarity rushed through her.

' _ You said you could take care of yourself... You did. _ '

She shook her head, clearing her mind as she blinked. Looking up at Tara and Rosita again, she noticed that they were watching her expectantly, as if they wanted her to continue talking about whatever it was that she felt for Daryl.

“We're friends,” Beth said lamely, but she knew deep down that she definitely didn't feel the same way she felt about Noah toward Daryl. The things she had felt for Daryl in the very beginning were different from anything she had ever felt toward anyone else in the group. She knew that there must be more to their story, but she just couldn't remember it and Daryl wasn't telling her anything about it.

Today, she had learned at least some things from her past and it had hurt her so deeply that she for a moment had wanted to just lose it completely on her sister and spew out all the anger that had been bottled up those seven months that she had been alone with Morgan. Every day had been a struggle, up until they had found the farmhouse, and every single day, she had wondered who it was that had left her behind as well as who it was that had loved her so much that they had taken the time to bury her.

Now, it just felt like Maggie had done it out of guilt. Guilt for never believing in her in the first place. The thought of it just made Beth angry again, but she had promised herself that she would let go of it and try to move forward again.

So when she looked at Tara and Rosita again and she thought about her and Daryl and the things that had been stirring inside of her chest without her permission, she just sighed. “We're friends,” she repeated.

If she  managed  to ignore the way her heart sped up just a little every time she thought about Daryl, her words  still  sounded like a lie, even to her own ears.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm so sorry to all of those who liked where I was going with Maggie and Beth, but Daryl needed to vent and Beth clearly heard at least some of it. Now, she doesn't know if she can trust her sister, while Daryl has talked to Maggie and understood at least a part of where she was coming from. Also, Maggie did give him "the green" (pun totally intended but I'll deny it if you ask) light when it comes to Beth. Although, I think it might take a little while until they actually get around to doing something about it...
> 
> As I mentioned, I'm sick and I've lost my voice completely and school is killing me at the moment, so nice words might help cure me faster and thus make me write faster too! *wink wink*
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it though! Thank you so much for reading and for showing your continuous support. Hugs all around!
> 
> xx


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgan has noticed something off with Beth ever since she came back from the run that almost ended in disaster...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE! Yes, everyone, you are seeing things right! This is an earlier update! Yay! *throws Bethyl confetti on all of you*
> 
> Okay, no but seriously now. Due to the AMAZING response I've gotten on this story, I got such a flow in writing this that I finished not only this chapter, but also the next one! So, here's a little deal for you all: Depending on whether or not this story passes 300 reviews on fanfiction and the comments I get on AO3, I'll see if I can post the next one (which is another favorite of mine- even though everyone will probably hate me for it...) on Wednesday next week? ;) How does that sound?
> 
> Without wasting any more of your time, please enjoy this chapter, which is a lot more Beth-centered! I hope you like it, but please, don't hate me by the end of it! :)
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 15

_ A few months earlier... _

“ _Are you cold?” he asked the girl while he touched the burning wood with a fire poker._

_ She looked up at him, shivering, her lips almost as blue as her eyes. He noticed that she swallowed before finally shaking her head. Morgan snorted, shaking his own head at the blonde's antics. _

“ _Well, lil' Lady, you sure as hell look freezing to me,” he told her, standing up as he began removing his jacket. She straightened her back and looked at him with wide eyes, holding up her hands to silently tell him not to take it off on her account._

_ He had gotten very good at reading her during the two months that they had been together, even if she wasn't able to speak yet. There was snow outside though and they had found a safe place for the night in an abandoned house, and he had decided that it was worth the risk of attracting walkers and people, all to avoid having her freeze to death. He had lit a small fire which at least offered them some warmth. _

“ _Take my jacket,” he told her, holding it out for her to take, but she refused him. “I'll find myself something else to wear in the morning when it's light outside again. We can't look around the house for clothes if we can't see anything.”_

_ The girl hesitated and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes at her. Instead, he draped the jacket over her shoulders without asking and she brought it up, covering her mouth as well as she closed her eyes, finally getting some warmth, relaxing. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked over at him when he sat down again, her blue irises twinkling with gratitude. _

“ _You're welcome,” he grunted, turning back to the small fire that he was trying to keep alive with the pages of an already torn up book._

_ He startled when he felt her move closer though and watched her curiously as she leaned her head against his shoulder, offering him at least some heat as well before her eyes drifted shut. Soon, he heard her breathing even out and he knew she had fallen asleep. He looked down at her and asked himself, when this stranger's life had become something he wanted to protect. _

* * *

_ Present time... _

Morgan watched Beth as she methodically cleaned her knives.

She had been sitting in the kitchen all morning in solitude, no one approaching her with anything other than a 'good morning' or in Daryl's case, a simple grunt that had actually made her smile.

Morgan had watched their small, barely noticeable exchange before the hunter had gone down to the basement to keep working on the generator that Eugene was sure that they were going to fix before the end of the day.

Yet, Morgan couldn't help but think about how Beth's attitude toward everyone had changed since she had come back from that run which had almost ended in disaster. The two of them had spent months together alone and even though they might have had their own disagreements from time to time, Beth had never acted the way she was now acting.

She had distanced herself from her sister during this week that had passed, only acknowledging her presence by simply leaving the room. Maggie had tried to talk to her a few times but it seemed like Beth had been too hurt by the fact that Maggie had lied to her, or at least kept part of the truth from her. 

In a way, Morgan understood where Beth was coming from. Their own friendship was built on truth and mutual trust which hadn't exactly just happened over one night. He remembered that there was a time when he had talked to himself after he had found Beth and the young girl had been scared of him when she had overheard him. It hadn't changed until he began telling her of his past; how he had lost his wife and then his son and how he finally got the courage to leave the small town he had been holed up in, to look for something new, a place where he might have a chance.

After that, Beth had gotten more comfortable around him because she seemed to understand why he was the way he was. He could see that the girl had been through quite a lot herself. The scars on her face as well as the one on her wrist showed him that she had been on the edge of giving up once, but she had pulled back and survived. He didn't know how she had survived the shot to her head, and he had never really cared much to get into it or try to investigate. Life in this world they lived in now was too short to dwell on such things and he had simply decided to address it as a miracle.

It was bothering him a bit though.

That Beth was acting this way, distancing herself from her sister.

Having blood relatives was a rare thing today and Morgan didn't want her to be so caught up in her anger, that if anything were to happen to Maggie, that she would end up with regrets. However, he understood the importance of giving her space and time to calm down on her own, but since he had noticed that the blonde didn't have any problems being around Daryl, or Glenn or anyone else in the group really, he figured it was time for him to take a walk with her to the little cabin they had found when they had been hunting one day, and maybe have a talk with her about what was going on with her.

“Hey, lil' Lady,” Morgan called from the door.

Beth didn't look up at him, but she kept cleaning her knives, “Yes, Old Man?”

Morgan suppressed a snort and raised an eyebrow at her as he leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms over his chest. “How do you feel about going on a walk?” he asked her. “Just the two of us? Like old times?”

“Are you trying to corner me into talking to you or something?” Beth wondered bluntly, looking up at him as she spoke.

“I would like to believe that I don't have to corner you into talking to me, but that you'd come to me on your own,” Morgan countered.

Beth sighed, putting her knife down as she stood up, “Okay. We'll take a walk. Let me just get ready.”

“I'll wait for you outside,” Morgan nodded, offering her a smile when she walked past him, heading upstairs. He looked after her and shook his head, chuckling a little before going to the drawer in the living room where he kept his own weapons. He grabbed his knife and walked to the weapons-closet, where they had decided to lock up all the weapons they had, taking out a rifle, just to be on the safe side. He knew that he wouldn't be using it, but one could never be too careful, no matter how low the walker count could get around there.

“I'm gonna get ya the fuckin' screwdriver!”

Morgan looked up, only to see Daryl walking up the stairs from the basement, muttering something about 'lying, asshole, fake scientists' who were 'too tired to get the damn screwdriver they forgot in their own damn room'. The man was wearing one of his usual shirts with cut-off sleeves and was sweating due to the work they were conducting in the basement.

When Daryl spotted Morgan, he looked at him curiously before glancing around the room. “Ya going somewhere?” Daryl asked, his eyes still moving from side to side as he took the room in, as if he was looking for something– or some _one_ , which Morgan realized that he clearly was.

Morgan had been around long enough to see the way that Beth and Daryl always seemed to seek each other out, even when the other wasn't in the room. The two of them had been practicing more regularly in hand-to-hand combat, but they preferred the privacy of the woods to train with the crossbow instead. Morgan hadn't asked Beth about it, but he knew that it was a good thing that she was getting the training that she deserved. He had thought a few times about Daryl's admission though; the one where the other man had admitted to him that he and Beth had been alone once upon a time. Morgan wondered how much Beth knew about it, but he was also aware of the fact that it wasn't his place to say anything.

“Beth and I are goin' out,” Morgan replied casually.

Daryl's eyebrows furrowed, “Oh?”

Morgan could tell that Daryl was trying to keep a neutral face, but Morgan really had seen enough to know what Daryl looked like when his thoughts were running wild inside of his head. “We're just gonna take a walk,” he assured him. “Won't be gone for too long and we'll be back before dinner.”

“I don't care,” Daryl grunted, narrowing his eyes slightly. “Ya can go wherever the hell ya want. I ain't no one's babysitter.”

“Didn't say that,” Morgan said calmly. “Just figured that if Rick ever gets himself away from that garden he's buildin', you might wanna be able to tell him where we went.”

Daryl didn't reply, which was a reply all on its own.

“Okay, Morgan, I'm ready!” Beth said as she she hurried down the stairs. She halted in her steps when she saw Daryl standing next to Morgan thought and Morgan most certainly did not fail to notice the way her eyes seemed to linger on Daryl for a tad too long. “Hey, Daryl,” she greeted, offering the other man a small smile.

“Hi,” Daryl said, although he shifted from one foot to the other. Morgan glanced at him and noticed how Daryl's own gaze lingered on the belt that Beth had strapped to her thigh, where her throwing knives were sheathed.

The blindness that the two of them seemed to suffer from almost made Morgan chuckle out loud, but he refrained from it. Instead, he shook his head and  cleared his throat, “Let's get goin', Beth.”

B eth looked over at him and nodded so he turned after offering Daryl a parting nod and started for the door. He heard Beth take a few steps, but when he didn't sense her following him, he glanced back over his shoulder, only to see that Daryl had grabbed her by her wrist, stopping her from moving.

“Watch your back out there,” Daryl mumbled quietly and since Morgan was certain that it hadn't meant to be heard by him, he turned back around and walked out, not waiting to hear what Beth's reply would be.

When she joined him outside though, and the two of them began their walk into the woods, he didn't fail to notice the way a pink hue had dusted Beth's cheeks.

* * *

' _Watch your back out there._ '

' _I will, I promise._ '

Beth could get the look  on Daryl's  face out of her mind as she and Morgan trekked through the forest. He had looked at her with such an intensity, his grip on her wrist both firm yet gentle enough to allow her to move away at any time she wanted.

' _Ya better keep your head straight. Don't get distracted and remember the things I taught ya._ '

' _It's just a walk, Daryl. I'll come back... Don't worry._ '

But he was clearly still intent on worrying and if anything, Beth had never been more distracted than she was now. If Morgan noticed that her mind wasn't present, he didn't say anything though, but he did walk in front of her, glancing back every few minutes just to see that she was keeping up with him.

Daryl's worried expression flashed in her mind again and she tried not to think about how his hand around her wrist had sent electric jolts through her entire body, straight to her core.

There was just something about that man that made her all warm,  _especially_ if he had been working in the basement,  _sweating_ and being all... _manly_ .

Beth suppressed a shudder and tried to get herself in check.

' _Don't get distracted,_ ' Daryl's voice repeated in her mind and she nodded at herself before determinately picking up her pace a bit so that she joined Morgan.

Her friend looked at her curiously before smiling and turning his attention on the road ahead of them again. They had left marks on the trees the first second time that they had visited the cabin, when they had cleaned it out and brought some things there for their back-up plan in case the farmhouse ever got run over by walkers and they needed to get out.

“How are you, Beth?” Morgan asked her, breaking the comfortable silence that they had fallen into.

“I'm fine,” Beth replied, although she couldn't exactly say that that was a hundred percent true.

Ever since her argument with Maggie a week ago, she had been doing everything in her power to just not be anywhere near her sister. Maggie had tried to approach her a few times, but Beth just  couldn't bring herself to forget. She was hurting because Maggie had kept something important from her and no matter how much she missed talking to her sister, she just couldn't ignore that.

“I think we both know that you aren't,” Morgan stated.

He had always been observant.

Beth sighed, “What do you want me to say, Morgan? Do you want me to admit that I'm pissed?”

“If that's what you are,” he shrugged as came to a stop.

“Well, I am,” Beth said. “I'm pissed at my sister for keeping something from me. Something that she had plenty of opportunities to tell me about, but chose not to.”

“She was trying to protect you,” Morgan pointed out, always trying to see reason in an argument.

“Well so are you and you've never _lied_ to me about something that important!” Beth exclaimed. She breathed heavily but then willed herself to calm down. It was no use in yelling at Morgan; he wasn't the one to blame here. “So, yes,” she concluded, “I am pissed at Maggie and I probably will be for a while.”

“Okay,” Morgan nodded, letting go of the subject, just like Beth knew he would.

At times, when they had been alone, after Beth had regained her ability to speak, Morgan riled her up a bit just so that she would spit out what she truly thought about something and then he would let go of the issue and take her thoughts into consideration before choosing their next move. Beth wondered why he was assessing her now, but it seemed to her that he was only trying to get a sense of what was going on inside of her mind. It wasn't really as if the two of them had been hanging out much lately, with her training with Daryl and Morgan always helping Rick with whatever it was that Rick was doing.

They kept making their way toward the cabin and Beth had a feeling that the issue she had with Maggie wasn't the only thing that Morgan was planning on bringing up today.

* * *

Morgan opened the old chest, pulling out a log to look at, “The firewood is still useful. Hasn't molded since we filled it up all those months ago.”

“That's good,” Beth called from the small bedroom. “I put the newly washed sheets in the closet. Hopefully, we won't have to use it any time soon, but at least they'll be there.”

“Maybe we should look for some pillows on our next run?” Morgan suggested, closing the chest that was close to the small fireplace as he stood up, wiping his hands on a rag that had been thrown over one of the chairs.

The cabin wasn't very big, but if needed, it could fit quite a few people. There were two rooms, one of which was supposed to be used as a living room and one small bedroom that basically just fit a twin bed and a small closet. In the living room, there was a small make-shift kitchen, but there had been nothing useful there except for the things that Beth and he had put there after they had found the cabin. There was also a small bathroom, with a shower that was connected to a stream a little further down the road. Beth had been elated to find out that it worked, despite the water being freezing cold, but they had taken to just bottling up water in the house when they had been alone. Now they had running and hot water in the farmhouse, thanks to Eugene's quick mind and Morgan had to admit that it gave them a wonderful sense of normalcy.

Beth's favorite thing about the cabin though, was it's fireplace. It wasn't very big, but it was enough to warm up the entire cabin if it was ever lit. They had lit it once and kept the glow dim enough so that no roamers in the area would see the light or sense the smoke, but after they had realized that there weren't many walkers there, they hadn't worried much about it. He remembered her telling him that night that they had spent in the cabin, that it felt as if she had maybe once been in a similar one. 'Fleeting images', she had called them, of a small cabin that was all messed up inside, but nothing else. All she remembered was that she had been happy when she had been there and that it had been warm. According to her, the heat from the fireplace, no matter how little it was, reminded her of that warmth she had felt there and thus, it made her happy again.

Now, Morgan could see nothing but tension in Beth's shoulders and he knew that it wasn't due to the training she and Daryl had been doing. There was something weighting on her, like it had been since she had returned from that run all those days ago.

“Did you remember anything else?” Morgan wondered as he stepped inside the bedroom, where Beth was still folding the sheets neatly.

“Remember what?” Beth asked. “Remembered _when?_ ”

“On that run,” Morgan clarified. “The one that you came back from in one piece even though something inside of you seems to be missing.” Beth looked up at him and he took another step closer, sitting down on the bed beside her. She didn't say anything at first, which only made him sigh deeply. “I know you, Beth. I know the girl you are _now_ , even if I never knew the girl you were _then_. I can tell when you've remembered something that you don't want me to know about.”

She touched a small tear in one of the sheets, her index finger tracing the frayed material.

“I did,” she finally confessed. “I remembered something... When that man, in the mall, was touching me.”

“You know you can talk to me,” was all he said, knowing that now that he had gotten her to start the conversation, she would tell him at least something.

“I remembered being in a hospital,” Beth told him. “Noah was there with me... It's been coming back in small pieces every night since then, but there's just one part that's stuck in my head. It doesn't let me sleep well.”

“And which part is that?” Morgan asked gently.

Beth stopped touching the sheet and turned to look at him, her eyes glassy. “There was a man there too: a police officer. I don't remember his name, but I remember him cornering me in a room, saying things that–” her breath hitched and she shook her head, looking away, but not before Morgan noticed a tear roll down her cheek.

He knew that it took a lot for Beth to openly cry in front of anyone. The rare occasions when it had happened up until now had been maybe once or twice when they had still been on the road and then whenever he caught her having a particularly bad dream.

Morgan moved his hand up, moving her chin toward him with two fingers. “Hey, hey,” he tried to comfort her in a whisper, a small smile accompanying his soft tone. “It's okay, Beth. You can tell me.”

Beth nodded, closing her eyes as more tears fell. “He _touched_ me, Morgan. I don't remember anything other than him pushing his hand under my shirt a-and I don't know what to think,” she cried. Morgan wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she moved closer, pressing her face against his arm. “I remember the same man pushing a lollipop between my lips, forcing me to eat it...”

“Beth,” Morgan said her name, for the first time not knowing what to say to reassure her that she was okay when he deep down knew how much it must hurt her to not know. He was certain that it would have been enough to drive any other girl crazy, but Beth was stronger than that.

“H-How am I s-supposed to move on, if I don't know– If I don't know if I was _raped_?” Beth sobbed, her fingers clutching the material of Morgan's jacket. He held her close and rubbed her back as he tried his best to comfort her.

“Shh,” he whispered, rocking her back and forth a little, hoping it would somehow soothe her. He remembered when Duane was younger and he would fall and scrape his knees and cry. Back then, rocking him like this was the only thing that had made him stop crying.

After a while, Beth's crying quieted, small sniffles replacing the sobs that had felt like a knife twisting in his chest. Morgan loved this girl like he would have loved his own daughter and he _hated_ seeing her break like this.

“Thank you, Morgan,” Beth finally whispered when she pulled away, wiping her face. Morgan could tell that she was still shaken but she was yet again pulling on her brave face. “I needed to talk to someone about that. I needed to talk to _you_ about that.”

“You don't gotta thank me, kid,” he said, brushing her hair down a bit as he offered her another sad smile. “I'm really at loss of what to say in this situation. I can't imagine what you're going through.”

“I just _wish_ that I knew what happened,” Beth said. “I wish I knew what happened, not because it would change anything, but because I feel like I need the closure. I need to know the end of the story.”

“Have you tried seeing what Noah knows?” Morgan asked her. “You mentioned that you remembered him being at that hospital with you?”

“I talked to him about it, but I never managed to build up the courage to ask him about that part. He did say that the police officers there were _bad_ and that they did stuff to women there,” Beth told him.

Morgan considered it for a moment. “Well, I think that you, Beth Greene, are a brave, young, _strong_ woman and I believe that you should ask Noah if he knows anything and not be afraid of the answer,” he said. “You're _here_ , Beth. Whatever that officer did or didn't do to you, you're still here and he's not. That has to mean something and I really believe, that it means that you have _always_ been strong. So you talk to Noah again and you tell him what you remember and then, we'll deal with whatever he knows.”

Beth's cheeks took on a pink hue again and Morgan offered her yet another smile when she nodded. No matter how many times he told her that she was a strong woman, her blush always reminded him of the insecurities that were still buried deep inside of her. She might not talk about it, but he knew that the scars on her face sometimes bothered her. Every time her face flushed red, he would remember that she still doubted herself at times and then he would swear to himself that one day, he would prove to her once and for all that she didn't need to.

Although, he wondered, whether someone else might already have begun proving it to her.

* * *

Beth and Morgan returned to the farmhouse before dinner, just as Morgan had told Daryl that they would. They were greeted by Carl and Judith who were playing in the living room before they went to join the others around the dinner table where Maggie and Rosita had prepared them food.

Beth briefly met her sister's eyes and she noticed how Maggie's eyes furrowed in confusion. She had tried her best to hide the fact that she had been crying, but she knew that Maggie was observant. It was clear, when her sister opened her mouth, that she had wanted to say something, but Daryl clearing his throat had stopped Maggie, who had only looked down at her plate. Beth walked over to the table and sat in the chair that had been left for her; the chair that was between Morgan and Daryl.

She ate in silence, downing out the sounds of Abraham re-telling a story of his youth and the other people's laughter. It wasn't until she felt a small tap against her foot that she glanced to the side, only to see Daryl looking at her, almost shyly. He just watched her for a couple of seconds, but for Beth, it felt as if time had slowed down and stopped completely.

There was a question in his eyes; a question that she was certain Maggie had wanted to ask before but that Daryl didn't even need to voice for her to understand.

He was asking her whether she was okay but all she could do was offer him a small, albeit sad, smile before looking down at her plate again. Daryl turned his attention back to his own food again, but his foot stayed where it was, right next to hers, offering her at least some comfort that she knew he might have been uncomfortable giving otherwise.

After dinner, Beth walked up to Noah and asked to speak with him. He had been a bit confused at first, but happy to comply and the two of them had walked up the stairs, to the privacy of her room. Beth felt Daryl's eyes on her, and as she ascended the stairs, she looked over at him, hoping that a look would be enough, yet again.

When they were inside her room, Beth paced as she told Noah the full story that she remembered, not leaving one detail out, just like Morgan had instructed her. Noah sat down on her bed and stared at her with wide eyes, taking it all in and Beth felt the hope for closure slowly dimming out.

“Beth, I don't know what to say,” Noah admitted. “I'm sorry, but I really don't know what happened to you in Dawn's office.”

Beth bit her lip, “Isn't there anything you might know? Or remember?”

“It must have happened right before you got me out,” Noah said, thinking about it. “The man you're talking about sounds like Gorman. He was one of the worst there...”

“So you don't know what happened?” Beth frowned. “You don't know if I... If I was raped?”

“No, I'm sorry,” Noah apologized, looking down at his hands. “I feel like it's my fault. I planned the escape with you... I should have been there.”

“It's not your fault,” Beth said sternly. “Don't you dare tell yourself that.”

“But, Beth–” Noah began, but she cut him off by holding her hand up.

“Stop, okay? It doesn't matter anymore,” she shook her head. “It's in the past. I just thought that if you maybe knew something...”

“Wait,” Noah said. “Maybe I do know something.” He was staring out in open space and Beth could almost see the wheels turning inside of his mind. “When we went back to the hospital, Gorman wasn't there. He was still a guard in that place, even though he did what he did... Dawn would have had him with her even then.”

Beth wanted to ask Noah why they had gone back to the hospital, but before she could, it seemed like Noah's words had released the clog that had kept her own wheels from turning.

Images of the police officer's– _Gorman's_ hands traveling up her shirt filled her head. Next, she remembered looking down on the floor, seeing bloodied fingers twitching. The feeling of cold glass in her hand returned after that and then, the loud _crash_ that followed after she hit Gorman with the vase over the head, and the gurgling of a walker eating his flesh a second later.

There had been blood everywhere and she had left.

She had left the man who had been about to rape her behind in that office and she hadn't as much as blinked because of it.

“I...” Beth trailed off, not knowing what to say. “I remember what happened.”

Noah looked up at her, concern in his eyes.

“It's okay,” she told him. “I'm okay. _Nothing_ happened, Noah, because I _killed_ him!”

Her exclaim was followed immediately by relief and the same emotion seemed to flood Noah too. He stood up from the bed and threw his arms around her, hugging her close and she couldn't help but reciprocate the embrace.

It wasn't until later that night, after she had shared the rest of the memory with Morgan, when she laid down in her bed again to go to sleep that she began thinking about what _could_ have happened.

Perhaps, she wasn't as good at letting go of the past as she thought she was.

* * *

Beth had twisted and turned in her bed for what had felt like hours until she had given up and gone downstairs. She had found Rick keeping watch and she had told him that she would take over and that he should go to bed. After some protesting, Rick had agreed and gone inside, while Beth had sat on the steps, looking ahead at the open and dark field, where she knew no walkers would wander though tonight.

Around midnight, the door behind her opened, but she remained unmoving, knowing who it was already. After all, he had taken it upon himself to always take the shift right after the witching hour for some reason and it wasn't until then, that Beth realized that the reason that she had gone out had been because she had wanted to wait for him.

What surprised her the most though, was that something warm covered her around her shoulders and she felt both his hands linger there for just a bit before he pulled back and moved to sit next to her. She looked down at the warm fleece blanket before turning to give Daryl a grateful smile.

It was all she could offer him at the moment because she was trying to calm her heart from hammering in her chest. Truly, it was borderline crazy, what his small innocent touches did to her body recently.

They sat in silence for a good while. Beth's mind was still spinning with thoughts and she wasn't sure what to say to him. While she knew that Daryl sensed something was wrong, she was certain that he wouldn't actually say anything until she spoke. Their relationship wasn't like her relationship with Morgan. She knew that she could trust Daryl because he wasn't the type of man who would tell on her. If anything, the thing she had told Rosita and Tara, about feeling safe with Daryl, was more than true. In fact, it surprised her just how safe she felt with him. Still, she didn't want to make him uncomfortable, but at the same time, she just wanted to tell him what it was that had been bothering her since that run, and the truth that she had found out today.

“It's getting' colder,” Daryl muttered when Beth pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders.

“Yeah,” she breathed out, biting her lip. She glanced at him and noticed that he was wearing a long sleeved flannel shirt. “I guess Winter is coming closer,” she mused.

“Yeah,” he echoed. “Good thing we're ready for it. Rick's been makin' sure we're ready...”

“He's good at keepin' us organized,” Beth agreed with a curt nod before silence once again fell between them.

“You think we'll be able to celebrate Christmas?” Beth asked after a while. 

“How the hell are we s'posed to know when Christmas comes 'round?” Daryl snorted.

“Well, when there's enough snow on the ground, I guess we should be able to pretend that it's Christmas,” Beth said with a shrug of her shoulders.

“Why ya wanna celebrate?” Daryl wondered.

“For Judith and Carl,” Beth said. “They deserve a Christmas now that we've secured this place properly.”

“If ya want that, then I'll need ya to watch my back while I get us a tree,” Daryl told her, making her smile. 

She reached over and put her hand on his arm and he turned to look at her. “Thank you,” she said and he returned her smile with a small upturn of his own lips. “Are you cold?” Beth then asked. “We can share the blanket, if you want?”

“Nah,” Daryl drawled. “Brought it for you.”

“It's big enough,” she said, pulling it off her shoulders to unfold it properly before scooting over to sit just a little bit closer to him before pulling it around his shoulders as well. He didn't protest when she did and he didn't move away when their knees and sides brushed against each other.

It was then that Beth decided that it was now or never.

“I remembered something that day when we were on the run,” she told him, speaking quickly so that she wouldn't be able to take it back. “I remembered being in a hospital, and some creep police officer cornering me and putting his hands under my shirt.”

This time, Daryl did tense next to her and as soon as she had spoken, his head had turned in her direction. She looked up at him, keeping her face as neutral as possible as a thousand emotions passed over his. It seemed like this time, he wasn't able to hide that she had not only surprised him, but also put him completely out of balance. Her confession had had an effect on him and she could see clear worry, pain, sadness and most of all _anger_ in his eyes.

“Beth–“

“He never got what he wanted,” she quickly interrupted him. “I killed him before he could. Smashed a glass statuette or vase or whatever over his head and then let a walker rip him to pieces.”

“Serves him right,” Daryl practically growled through clenched teeth.

“Does it make me a bad person?” she wondered. “That I don't even care that I killed someone.”

“He was a bad person, Beth, not _you_ ,” Daryl told her, looking surprised by her question. “I've killed people too an' I don't regret it either 'cause if I hadn't I might not have been alive today.”

“Still,” Beth said. “I feel like it _should_ bother me more. Taking a life, I mean.”

“You ain't a bad person, Beth,” Daryl said again, this time sterner than before. “I don't think you could ever be a bad person.”

Beth looked at him intently and frowned. “You always talk like that, Daryl,” she pointed out. “You say things that make it seem like we were close before but you say that we barely even talked.”

She knew that she had said something similar to him once, but this was brought out out of frustration. The man, and the way he spoke, was confusing to her. She had always had that feeling that there was more than he was letting on but she had decided long ago to just let him tell her. Now though, that she had found out that Maggie had been keeping the fact that she hadn't even been with her when she had died, Beth wanted to know even more what it was that Daryl was keeping from her. Although, the man seemed determined to just pretend that there wasn't more to the story.

Now, he was just staring down at her and she literally felt like punching him in the face for it. Anger welled inside of her and she wished that he would just say something instead of looking at her with those stupidly blue eyes of his that made her insides melt.

When he didn't, she shot him another glare before standing up, removing the blanket from herself and throwing it at him. She turned around and walked to the door, not looking back even as she felt his eyes burning holes in the back of her head. She didn't want to be disappointed again. She didn't want him to just be quiet. The only she wanted was for him to actually tell her something about _them_ because she knew that there must be _something_ at least.

But she walked away from him and went to bed, knowing that there was no way that Daryl Dixon would ever give her what she wanted tonight.

* * *

Daryl watched Beth as she left, regretting that he hadn't known what to say.

He had been busy all day long down in the basement with Eugene and Tyreese and they still hadn't been able to fix the damn generator because some piece was missing and now they would have to go on another run to try and find the missing part. On top of all that, Beth hadn't been around to watch him tinker on the generator either. He had gotten used to having her there, silently watching when she didn't have anything better to do and he had missed her, more than he knew he probably should.

And then, during dinner, when she had sat down next to him and he had seen her eyes red-rimmed, revealing that she had been crying when she had gone out on a walk with Morgan, he had wanted almost desperately to know what it was that had upset her.

When she had not so discretely asked Noah to come with her up to her room, it had felt as if blood had turned to lead and his heart had fallen into the pit of his stomach. He recognized the feeling because he had felt it before when he had thought that there might have been something going on between Morgan and Beth, but he didn't want to believe that he might actually be jealous of Noah.

But then Beth had looked down at him and he had known, without any words being passed between them, that he didn't need to worry because nothing was going to happen between her and the young man.

When he had gone down to take over the shift from Rick, he had been surprised to see Beth sitting outside on the steps, in just her pajamas. He knew that it was cold outside so he had gone to the closet and taken out one of the spare blankets that they had retrieved on a run. When he had wrapped it around Beth, she had been relaxed and he knew that she had gotten used to sensing when he was around, just like he always knew when she was approaching him.

Everything had been fine at first. He had contemplated asking her about why she had been crying earlier today, but he didn't want to impose, figuring that if she wanted him to know, she would tell him all on her own. When she had started talking about celebrating Christmas, he had humored her mostly because he knew that she was using that to cover up what she really wanted to talk to him about.

He never would have expect her to say _that_ though.

To insinuate that she had been _raped_ at the hospital by one of the cops there.

His mind had gone completely blank for a moment before his ears filled with a ringing noise. The memories related to that hellhole flashed in his mind and he saw her falling down, blood everywhere. Then he had realized what she had been saying and anger filled him instead. The thought of some lowlife cop _touching_ Beth made him want to find the asshole and strangle him, or _worse_.

Of course, before he could tell Beth something stupid like that, she had shared that she hadn't actually been raped because she had killed the man before he had done anything to her. Still, from what Daryl had understood, that had been the memory that the bad men at the mall had triggered for her and he understood just why she had been acting so out of balance since then, wanting to train and get stronger again while distancing herself from Morgan and then fighting with Maggie. Beth had clearly been keeping a lot of dark things bottled up, but it made sense to Daryl because he was keeping a lot of things in too.

That was why he hadn't dared to speak when she had once again stated that he spoke as if the two of them had been close once. He knew that if he had started talking then, he would have spent the whole night confessing _everything_ to her, even if he wasn't one hundred percent sure just what 'everything' was.

That he had been her friend and that he had grown to care about her when the two of them had been alone after the place they had called home for so long had fallen. That he had been reckless and that he had lost her, ultimately setting in motion things that in the end had gotten her killed.

That he might have been on the edge of actually falling for her, if he hadn't actually done just that that night in the funeral home...

Daryl sighed deeply to himself, shaking his head when the memories of that night returned to him as well. He knew that he might have just pushed Beth away and he hadn't even uttered a single word to her. It bothered him that she had questioned her own goodness because she had killed her would-be rapist, but the only thing Daryl could think about was what could have happened to her in the hospital, all because he had been distracted and gotten her kidnapped. It was his fault that he had lost her that night when the walkers had attacked and he blamed himself not only for her getting shot, being presumed dead and the memory loss she was now suffering from, but also for everything bad that happened to her when she had been on her own.

He remembered when they had gone to make the exchange in the hospital; the scars he had seen on her face that were no longer bloodied like they had been then, but still there, marring her previously unmarked skin... That was all on him and he wasn't sure there was anything anyone could say to change his mind about that.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Daryl... Why can't you just open your mouth and say something? *Ducks from any possible tomatoes being thrown at her* I'm sorry guys, they needed a small bump in the road, and with everything that's been going on with Maggie and Beth, it was bound to annoy Beth that Daryl stayed quiet once again when she asked him about them...indirectly...
> 
> But no not worry! The next chapter has another LOADED training session as well as something else... The shit is going to hit the fan, if I may say so myself... But what did you think of this chapter? I know there wasn't much direct Bethyl, except for that final scene, but there were some minor ones, like the dinner touch, the silent questions and the looks... And the fact that Morgan has been observing them and noticing their OBVIOUS attraction to one and other! So please, do tell me what you thought, and remember my promise! The more reviews, the bigger the chance for chapter 16 on Wednesday! Your support means a hell of a lot to me, so I'm sending out all my love to you all! :) xx


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something goes wrong...so very wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE! (Again! ^^) Yes, people, that is right! Since this story passed the 300 review mark on ff, I decided to give you guys the next chapter immediately, and not wait until Wednesday, as I had originally planned! I just wanted to say that your support so far has meant a lot to me and I am truly amazed by the positive response! As someone who doesn't have English as her first language, it means a lot when you guys compliment me on my writing, truly. I don't even know where to begin with thanking you.
> 
> Oh, and I truly am sorry for this chapter, but it needed to be done.
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 16

Daryl dodged the punch, pushing Beth's hand to the side so that she would stumble forward. He was pleased to see that she didn't though, and he was also glad that she had picked up on the things he had been showing her these last couple of days.

Five days had passed since the night she had left him sitting on the porch; five days and she hadn't as much as mentioned it _once_. Instead, they had thrown themselves into training, every day for at least two hours they would work on her upper body strength before proceeding to go out in the woods for a few hours to hunt. Beth had proven to him that a part of her still remembered how to track, which made the hunting much more easier than he had expected.

They had finally gotten the generator fixed, which meant that they now had electricity in the house, even though it was a small amount of it. The generator wasn't very powerful, but it would be enough to at least let them use a nightlight every once in a while, even though they would have to cover the windows properly before doing so so that no walkers would spot the farmhouse from a distance. Although, Eugene had been trying to figure out a way to make the generator stronger by somehow setting up an extra power source externally, but Daryl knew that he wouldn't be able to help with that until the scientist figured it out first.

The next project that Daryl had helped working on though, had been fixing up the old barn. Rick had, as usual, organized the whole thing and everyone had pulled their own weight, one way or another. Eugene had helped connect some lamps so that there would be light in there if they needed it and right now, Daryl was thankful for it since it was still a bit on the early side and the barn hadn't been well lit up when he and Beth had come down here to train.

Beth's punches, he noticed, got more and more aggressive with every day that passed and their conversation from that night wasn't discussed between them, but he wasn't going to break. He didn't want to be the first one to address it, even though he knew that he should probably be more mature and just dive head in and hope for the best.

But he couldn't do that.

He couldn't just risk losing everything the two of them had managed to build up until now. This, at least somewhat, established friendship meant too much for him to just ruin it by admitting that he, just like Maggie, had been keeping things from her and lying by omission.

Daryl didn't want to think about what would happen if Beth ever actually found out the things that he had been keeping from her, but unlike Maggie, he hadn't merely been keeping them from her out of guilt for the things that he had caused, but also out of the need he felt to protect her from ever getting hurt again. He thought about the way Maggie had talked about how her hope had resulted in Beth dying that day and Daryl just couldn't help bur think that if he actually told Beth the truth now, she would get so pissed at him that she would wander off and get herself killed, or worse.

And he didn't want that.

“Fight _back!_ ” Beth grunted, her breathing coming in a bit heavier as he kept ducking away from her punches. She had gotten a good one in a bit earlier, but it had only been to his shoulder so he hadn't been as hurt as he would have been if she had connected her fist to his jaw, which he was sure she had actually been aiming for. She wasn't exactly doing anything to hide the fact that she really was angry.

“The hell do ya think I'm doin'?” he blatantly asked her, tapping her side to show her where he would have gotten a hit in if he had actually been throwing fists as well.

“Holding back,” Beth practically growled at him before stepping forward, kicking her leg out toward his side. Without thinking, he caught her ankle and pulled, causing her to lose her balance and jump forward on one leg. He grabbed her shoulder and pulled her leg closer as she began falling backwards, but instead of actually letting her fall all on her own, he used his grip on her shoulder to gently lower her to the ground.

He looked down at her as his body hovered over hers and even though he recognized his mistake of making this move, he didn't pull back. Beth's breath was coming out heavily as he released her shoulder, his hand instead moving to hold himself up by the side of her head, keeping her trapped. He was still holding her leg, but instead of keeping his hand on her ankle, he had moved it to her knee, which now pressed against his own hip.

Daryl's heart beat quickened and his stomach twisted in a pleasurable way that had him cursing himself and his brain for yet again thinking things and for making his body reacting in a way that it shouldn't.

“Am I holdin' back now?” he asked her, once he finally got his brain to shut up. Of course, that only lasted until it registered that Beth was clutching his shirt in her hand, looking up at him with those innocent looking blue eyes that made his gut do funny things that he had never experienced before in this magnitude.

He could see something else in her eyes then. It looked to him as if she was both asserting him and calculating something in her mind. Before he knew what was happening, she had pushed the hand that hadn't been clutching his shirt out, making his hand that was keeping him steady above her move to the side, causing him to lose his balance. As fast as she had done that, she had lifted her hips and pressed her knee tighter against his hip while she had pressed at his chest with the hand that had been holding onto him.

Daryl found himself on his back, blinking up dumbly at the ceiling of the barn a millisecond before Beth's face appeared above his. She was straddling him, sitting low on his belly, leaning over him with a smug smirk that he was sure mimicked the one he had been giving her earlier when he had had her under him.

“Yes,” she answered, sounding as confident as ever even though her cheeks seemed a little more flushed than before. Yet again, it seemed like his hands had a life of their own as they moved to settle on her hips, rewarding him with a sharp intake of breath from Beth.

And then they just stayed still like that for what felt like hours and hours, frozen after that particular move that had originally been his own doing.

Beth's knees were pressed tightly against his sides and even as she sat on his lower stomach, she felt like she weighted absolutely nothing.

' _You're heavier than you look._ '

Memories of that piggyback ride he had given her after she had injured herself rushed into his mind when he noted that she had lost some weight since that time. Sure, he had only grunted that to tease her and make their miserable lives just a tad less hapless, because truthfully, she had never weighted much to begin with. Although, she definitely was thinner now; thinner but also more defined.

He had seen the muscles in her arms move as she used his crossbow, felt her strength whenever she had gotten a good kick or punch in. He had held her in his arms, comforted her in a way he had never thought that he would comfort anyone ever before and when he thought about those moments, he recognized feeling the flatness of her stomach that had been a lot harder than he remembered it being from that time when she had embraced him from behind, outside of the moonshine shack.

Not that he had been thinking about having Beth Greene's body pressed against his or anything.

He was just making small observations after all.

“Are we ever gonna talk about it?” Beth asked, frowning down at him. She didn't move away from him though, which he decided to take as a good sign and she didn't remove his hands from her hips, which he guessed wasn't that bad either.

“What?” he wondered, his voice coming out hoarser than he had expected and he suddenly realized just how badly having Beth straddling him like this was affecting him.

Thank God that they were alone in the barn.

“I don't wanna be mad at you for not sayin' anythin', Daryl,” Beth sighed, sounding resigned. She brushed back a golden lock that had fallen out of her ponytail and placed it behind her ear. “But I am,” she confessed.

He knew he should say  _something_ but he didn't know  _what_ .

“I don't got anythin' to say,” he said instead, knowing that it would only serve to disappoint her even more. “Other than good job at flippin' me over like that,” he added then, hoping to ease at least some of the tension between them.

It seemed to have worked at least a little because he noticed how Beth's lips twitched just for a fraction before her frown was back. He still saw it as a small victory in his mind.

“I think we're done trainin' for today,” he told her then. Beth didn't bother hiding her disappointment, but finally, she moved away from him, standing up as she walked over to her bottle of water. He sat up and watched her, catching his own bottle that she threw at him before turning her back to him.

She was sweaty and dirty and she had never looked more wild and beautiful to him than in that exact moment- Except for maybe that time when she had smiled at him and told him that they should burn down the shack. He wished he had the right to tell her that she was beautiful, he truly did. However, he knew that he shouldn't, because it would only complicate things further between them and neither of them needed that right now.

Maybe some distance would do them both good?

Beth could get time to figure out her problems with Maggie and Daryl would get to sort himself out, along with his brain and it's funny thoughts about Beth and the things his heart did whenever the blonde was near.

_'Ah, shit,'_ Merle whispered somewhere in the back of his mind.  _'Who tha fuck are ya kiddin', baby brother? Ain't nothin' to be done now. You're_ long _gone!'_

Daryl took a large gulp from the water bottle, hating that Merle could be right, even after he was dead.

* * *

Beth didn't look much at Daryl when the two of them began walking back toward the farmhouse.

Or at least she tried telling herself that, but deep down she knew that she wasn't very good at lying, especially considering how her eyes seemed to drift to the man as he walked by her side.

She wasn't going to say that she didn't understand what exactly had happened in the barn after she had flipped them over, because she knew that the way her body was still tingling after having his hands on her hips was a good indicator that there had been _a lot_ of tension there, and it hadn't all been out of anger.

Beth couldn't remember much about her past, which meant that she naturally couldn't claim that she had never felt something like that before. She knew that she had had two boyfriends and that she had slept with one of them, but she didn't remember how he, _Zach_ , had made her feel.

The only thing she knew now was the way that _Daryl_ made her feel.

She was angry with him for not saying anything, _again_ , and she was disappointed because she thought that the two of them had grown closer during the time that had passed since that run. But if the two of them really had grown closer, why hadn't she gone to Daryl as soon as she had suspected that she might have been raped? Well, it wasn't as if it was something that had been easy to confess to anyone, let alone the man who she believed that she might be starting to care for as a lot more than just a friend. It had taken her time to even go to Morgan about it, and as soon as she had found out that she hadn't been touched by that cop, she had told Daryl.

Though, maybe there had been a better way to tell him than just blurting it out like that when the two of them had been so comfortable around each other.

Beth looked at Daryl again, but he seemed adamant to keep his eyes on the farmhouse, walking close to her even though there was an obvious distance between them. His crossbow was raised in his hands as he walked, making him look like a fierce protector, which she was sure that he was.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a figure moving and she turned her head in the direction, only to see Father Gabriel climbing the wall. She narrowed her eyes and automatically reached out to Daryl, touching his bare arm. His attention turned to her and she nodded her head in the direction of the pastor, knowing that Daryl caught sight of him just before the man disappeared into the woods.

“Where's he going?” Beth frowned.

“Not sure,” Daryl muttered. “Should I go after him?”

“No,” Beth shook her head quickly. “He'll probably be back soon.”

Daryl nodded at her curtly, his eyes meeting hers. She realized that she was still touching his arm and she let go immediately before swallowing thickly. The urge to say something to him bubbled up inside of her again, but she refrained from doing so and began walking back to the farmhouse again, hearing Daryl trailing after her.

The rest of the group was outside when Beth and Daryl finally got to the house. Glenn was helping Morgan, who was tinkering with his truck that had been acting up, Rosita, Tara, Sasha and Maggie were sitting together, talking about something, looking carefree for once. Carol and Tyreese were sitting next to each other, talking in hushed whispers while Noah and Carl played with Judith who seemed absolutely enamoured with a stuffed animal that they had found in the basement. Rick was looking over maps with Eugene and Abraham, looking concentrated as ever. They were all wearing thicker clothes than what Beth and Daryl were currently wearing. It really had begun getting colder, which meant that they were surely entering the fall now. Beth and Daryl hadn't needed the extra layers when they had been training, since they knew that they would get warm enough as it was.

Rick looked up from his maps, “Everything go okay?” They had all known that Daryl and Beth would be off training, but since the day that Maggie and Beth had argued, none of them had come to watch them when they did. Although Rick always made sure to ask if everything had been fine, making Beth wonder if it was supposed to somehow state the fact that everyone in the group knew that they sought out privacy from time to time.

“Good,” Daryl replied, his tone not hinting that anything was wrong. “Surprised me today though,” he added, still not looking at Beth as he came to a stop by Rick's side.

Beth looked at him then before turning to Rick, who was looking at her with an amused smile on his lips, “Ya got the better of Daryl Dixon, did ya?” Beth tried to act indifferent, but nodded anyway, feeling just a little bit more proud of herself when Rick's small smile spread out into a full-on grin.

“I'm gonna go take a shower,” she said, looking over at Eugene. “Do I have to get the hot water going or-?”

“We already have it runnin',” Eugene told her. “I think Michonne is showering though.”

“Well, I'll get my things then,” she said, offering the scientist a kind smile which he returned shyly. Beth turned to walk into the house, but not before meeting Daryl's gaze which once again only caused her heart beat to quicken.

She tried to shake the feeling off and hurried inside, not looking back. In her room, she gathered the things she would need. A change of clothes, clean underwear, the vanilla soap they had found on the last run which was the only thing they had at the moment and her knife. Even though she knew she would be perfectly safe in the bathroom, she always carried the knife with her.

When she walked to the bathroom, Michonne had just stepped out, looking fresh and rested. The other woman looked up at Beth and offered her a smile. “How did training go?”

“Good,” Beth replied, echoing Daryl's response from earlier.

“You get a good punch in?” Michonne wondered, making Beth shrug.

“I think I surprised him a bit at least,” she admitted and Michonne nodded.

“You keep up the good work then,” she said, stepping to the side so that Beth could enter the bathroom. “I tried to clean up the water a bit, and I opened the window. Enjoy your shower,” Michonne told her, before turning around and walking away.

Beth knew that she didn't need to say anything else to the woman, because the two of them seemed to have some kind of mutual understanding. So instead, she stepped inside the bathroom and began stripping off her clothes.

She got in and turned on the water, adjusting it to a temperature where it wasn't too warm but not too cold either. As she scrubbed her body clean, using her soap, she made a mental note to herself that the next time she went on a run, she would try to find some shampoo and conditioner. Maybe Daryl or someone else who had been on runs more frequently these last few months had a better idea on where to look though.

Her hands moved over her body and her mind wandered again. She took a deep breath and stepped under the spray of water, letting it down out everything around her as she closed her eyes, letting the warmth spread all over her. It wasn't just about not letting any sounds of the outside world in, but it was also about her not letting herself think the thoughts that she knew she had been close to thinking.

She didn't want to think about that moment in the barn, or the way that Daryl's hands had felt on her hips, or the way that his grip had tightened just a fraction when she had looked into his eyes. She didn't want to think about the funny things it had done to her insides or how a part of her now wished that she had been brave enough to push him just a little bit further, if only to see what he would have done in retaliation.

Beth's eyes snapped open and she took a step back, leaning her back against the tiled wall.

Her wandering mind was playing a dangerous game, and she couldn't help but feel like it would be her heart in the end that got hurt.

*** * ***

The farmhouse was, in Father Gabriel's mind, a blessing from the Lord that had been bestowed upon them after months of struggling and being tested in every way possible. When they had been on the road, Gabriel had lost his faith, thinking that God had in fact abandoned them, like everyone else in the group seemed to believe. He had killed walkers too, if only, so that he could live, but he knew deep down that he would never be a fighter. The only reason he had survived was because he had been with Rick and his group and he was glad that they hadn't thrown him out or left him behind somewhere to rot after the stunt he had pulled back at the church that one time, which had endangered little Judith Grimes' life.

Then, Morgan found them and they found _Beth_ , the girl whose name had only been spoken quietly in passing, or heard in Maggie's wails or whispered sometimes out in the night by Daryl Dixon while he was on watch, not knowing that Gabriel had a hard time sleeping when he thought about what difficulties they would face the next day.

Beth Greene was his miracle.

She was his sign that God was still watching down on them and that there was still a plan for everything that was happening. The world may no longer be what it had once been, but finding Beth had made Gabriel believe, once again, that things would eventually be restored to the way they were supposed to be.

He knew that the young woman was skeptic of him and his beliefs and he was aware of the fact that Noah had his concerns regarding him as well, just like everyone else in the group. They thought that he was losing it, or that he already had lost it, but he knew that he hadn't.

If anything, he was more than determined to show them just how wrong they were, which was why he had yet again gone out into the woods, despite Beth Greene's warnings. He wanted to show her and everyone else that the Lord was watching over him and that He would also watch over them, when they needed it.

So he walked the route he had grown accustomed to, on the path that he now recognized and knew like the back of his hand. He stopped for a moment though, when he heard a strange sound. It was a light buzzing that he couldn't remember ever hearing before, but when it stopped, he didn't think much of it and continued to walk instead.

When a walker stumbled out between the trees, looking thinner than any dead person he had seen up until now, clothes barely hanging onto the body of the girl who had once been alive and probably thriving, he paused briefly. The biter's growls and snarls weren't very loud, and she was moving forward slowly, which meant that he wouldn't have to kill her right this instant. Instead, he could head back toward the farm and make her fall into the pits that they had dug and then ask someone else to take care of her.

He wasn't going to kill again, he vowed to himself as he began walking again.

More rustling was heard through the bushes and suddenly, panic welled inside of him when more groans and moans were heard as well as a lot more heavy footsteps. He looked back, only too see a couple of more walkers stumble out of the bushes behind the first one. These looked bigger, more dangerous than the undead girl.

He picked up his pace a little, only to see that the walkers too increased theirs. When a dozen more walkers moved out of the bushes, Father Gabriel turned back around and began running, his breath coming in heavily as he heard the walkers growling behind him, following him. His mind was everywhere and nowhere at the same time. He didn't know what to do.

He would run to the pits, like he had planned from the beginning. The walkers would fall into them and he would get the rest of the group ready to take them out and he wouldn't put anyone else in danger.

When he ran out of the woods though, his steps faltered a bit because he realized that he had taken the wrong path after all. Instead of coming to where the pits were, he had gotten to the place he had started, where no holes had been dug yet. The walkers were still coming though and he knew that the mistake was already made. They were following him back here, to the farmland, to where everyone else was.

And he had ended up making the same mistake that he had done back at the church. Yet again, he had put everyone in danger, all because he had wanted to prove to them and himself that God was still there, watching over them.

If this turn of events was supposed to be taken as a sign, he now knew that the Lord had forsaken them a long time ago.

* * *

Daryl couldn't help but look Beth's way when she stepped out of the house again. She was wearing fresh clothes and her blonde hair was darkened due to the water she had showered in earlier. The young woman was playing with her hairband in one hand as she approached Carol, Tyreese and Noah, standing in front of Carol as she told her something. Daryl observed as Carol nodded and Noah moved off the bench where he had been sitting next to her. Beth sat down and Carol picked up her blonde hair and began twisting it into a long braid as Beth smiled and talked to Tyreese about something.

She looked so beautiful and innocent at that moment; so _happy_ , that it actually hurt Daryl to look at her, knowing that he didn't have a right to. He knew that there was something happening between them; something was _changing_ between them. She was hurt by his lack of ability to speak to her about things but he knew she was nowhere ready to hear what he was thinking about her.

He watched as Carol finished Beth's braid and kissed the younger woman on the cheek, affectionately running her hand over her head. Beth smiled up at Carol and continued her conversation with Tyreese and Noah, not noticing how Daryl was watching her, even though he wasn't being very subtle.

Forcing his eyes away from the blonde, he looked over at Maggie instead, who seemed to also have been looking at her sister. The older Greene had finally seemed to have understood that the best thing she could do at the moment was give Beth space, and that was exactly what she was doing.

Daryl's thoughts were cut off by a loud, male voice, screaming. He turned sharply, instinctively lifting his crossbow. Rick and the others stood as well. Dread filled him instantly and he knew that they were seeing the same thing that he was.

Father Gabriel had just climbed the wall that they had built to reinforce the old fence. Behind him, were at least fifty walkers, growling and snarling, pressing against the blockade.

There was no way that it was going to hold.

Father Gabriel was still running, with a limp and screaming like the stupid asshole Daryl officially thought he was. Daryl knew they were screwed the second the wall cracked and the first walker slipped through.

* * *

Beth watched in horror as the walkers that were coming after Father Gabriel stumbled forward, toward the house. The monsters were still far away though, which meant that they might have a chance to stop them before they reached the farmhouse.

Everyone around her sprung in action.

She heard Rick yell out orders to everyone and they all hurried inside to get the weapons out of the weapons closet. Beth looked over at Carl, who was holding tightly to Judith and she ran to him, grabbing him by the shoulder. Glancing up, her eyes frantically searched for Daryl. When she spotted him, he was already halfway out of the main garden, crossbow raised as he hurried toward Gabriel. The protest that she had been about to yell after him died on her lips and she realized that she needed to hurry so that she could be by his side and take down the dead ones that threatened their home.

But first, she needed to get Carl and Judith out of the way.

She pulled Carl with her and the boy nearly stumbled before recovering, holding tightly his sister who began crying. Beth led them inside the house and up the stairs, to her bedroom. She made them step inside and hurried to her closet, taking out her box of throwing knives and the spare gun she had there.

“You need to stay in here,” she told Carl as she strapped the knives to her. “Stay here with Judith. Keep her safe and barricade the door. If you need to get out, you can climb out the window with her. I've done it a lot of times to practice in case something like this happened.” She was talking quickly while she took out a backpack from the closet. “In this bag, there's a map to a cabin that Morgan and I found. It's safe there, but don't leave until you know for sure that you absolutely have to.”

“We can't just leave!” Carl protested, but Beth forced him to sit on the bed.

“I promise you that I'll try to make sure that you won't have to,” she told him. “There are a lot of us but there are more of them, but I promise that we're gonna pull through this. All you have to do is take care of Judith and keep her safe, okay?” Carl nodded then and Judith began squirming in his grip. “Listen to me,” Beth said. “Strap Judith to your chest, okay? Climb out the window if things get bad, turn left and there's a ladder on the side. The walkers aren't smart so they'll probably head straight for the house. Climb down that ladder and then run as fast as you can with Judith out of here. The map has landmarks mapped out too so you'll be able to find the cabin. Just, _promise me_ that if you see things go wrong, you'll run. Promise me, Carl!”

“I promise,” Carl nodded frantically.

She closed her eyes for a moment and touched the younger boy's cheek before gently touching the back of Judith's head. “Stay safe,” she told him again. “And barricade the door.”

With those final words, she left the gun for him on the nightstand and hurried out of the room and down the stairs. Everyone else was already moving toward the heard of walkers that was heading their way, but Rick looked up at her when she approached them.

“Glenn and Tyreese are gonna drive down there and try to distract them,” he told her, looking around worriedly. “Have you seen Carl and Judith?”

“They are safe,” Beth told him quickly. He nodded at her and then handed her a gun. “The sounds...” she trailed off when he shook his head.

“We can't worry about that now,” he told her, just as the first few shots rang out.

When they reached the others, the fight was already happening. There was blood everywhere and shots were being fired from left to right as the walkers fell, one by one. Beth knew that she shouldn't let herself get distracted, but her eyes couldn't help but seek everyone out. She needed to know that everyone was still alive and breathing so that she wouldn't accidentally hit them with her knives.

A snarl next to her caused her to gasp and she turned, automatically lifting her knife, embedding it into the forehead of the walker that had been about to attack her. She kicked it away from herself and turned, taking down another two before throwing one of her knives at a fourth one that had been heading for Rick. She could see Michonne moving swiftly in the background, using her katana to bring down the biters before the could get too close to Rick or the house. The woman wasn't clean anymore and Beth knew that the shower she had taken herself had been for nothing.

It felt like years passed, but the walkers just never seemed to stop coming at them. She knew that there couldn't have been _that_ many, but she knew she had seen at least fifty or more heading toward the house when Father Gabriel had first led them there. Then again, that sum was kind of large, even with the amount of people they had in their group.

She finally spotted Daryl and her breath hitched in her throat when she saw him use one of his bolts to kill a walker before stabbing another one in the head with his hunting knife. He was moving as quickly as he could but Beth moved toward him without even thinking, or looking around first.

“ _Beth!_ ” Noah's voice rang out suddenly and Beth felt herself being pushed to the side. At first she panicked, thinking that a walker had gotten her, but the next moment she heard Noah cry out. She opened her eyes and stared as a walker took a large bite out of Noah's shoulder, causing him to scream out in pain as blood oozed from the wound,

“ _No_!” Beth screamed, standing up and running forward, stabbing the walker in the head. It fell off of Noah and the young man dropped forward, into Beth's arms. “No, no, no! Noah, no!” Beth repeated, frantically pressing her hands against the wound on Noah's shoulder.

The sound of a bolt being fired through the air was heard behind her and she heard a loud thump. She turned her head around, seeing Daryl running toward her and Noah and a walker, that had probably been about to take a bite out of her, laying dead on the ground, an arrow sticking out of the back of its head.

Beth turned her attention back to Noah, cradling his tear-stained face in her hands, shaking her head at him. “You're not gonna die, Noah,” she told him, feeling sadness and anguish filling her up. “You're gonna be _okay_.” Her voice cracked and her lips trembled when Noah's eyes began dropping.

“It's okay, Beth,” Noah said, his voice sounding strained as he moaned in pain. “It was supposed to be like this... You saved my life and now I got to save yours.”

“You're _not_ gonna die!” Beth yelled at him, almost angrily. Around her, the walkers were now all dead and the rest of their group was beginning to gather around them.

“Beth.” She felt Daryl's hand on her shoulder, but she just shook her head.

“We can cut it off,” she said, pushing his hand away from her. “We can just cut off his arm.”

“He was bit in the shoulder,” Daryl spoke reasonably, but she could hear that he was upset too. “The adrenaline... Makes the infection spread faster.”

“We can't just–” Beth cut herself off when Carol stepped forward, dropping to her knees on the other side of Noah. A sob fell from the older woman's lips as she brushed Noah's hair away from where it was sticking to his forehead.

“I'll be okay,” Noah whispered, eyes dropping closed, tears still falling as he smiled sadly. “Don't let me become one of them, Beth... Don't let me become one of them...”

Beth's throat felt thick and the spare knife that she usually kept in her boot seemed to be burning her skin, searching her attention. She bit back a sob, but let her tears fall freely, not caring who saw her crying this time. Her friend was dying because he had saved her life and she didn't care.

She took out her knife and held on to Noah's hand, putting it over his heart. “You're gonna be okay, Noah,” she whispered his words back to him. “We're all gonna be okay.”

“Dad?” she heard Carl say somewhere in the distance and she just knew that the boy had seen that they were safe enough for him to come out of the house. Beth heard Judith's small whimpers and she knew that Carl had taken the baby with him outside to reunite with their father. She tried not to think about what Carl was about to see her to do to his friend.

Beth reached over and took Carol's hand. The woman was crying too, looking down at the boy she had grown close to. Beth placed her hand over Noah's that was resting on his chest before covering it with her own. She squeezed lightly before moving her knife forward, pressing it into Noah's temple swiftly. She looked up and blinked a few times, trying to gather her thoughts when Noah's chest stopped moving, when he stopped breathing.

She couldn't look down at him, but she pulled her knife out, feeling her friend's blood cover her fingers and she stood up numbly. Tyreese moved toward Carol, kneeling next to her as she held on to Noah's dead body, whispering words of comfort into her ear while the woman cried over another life lost.

Beth turned and faced Daryl, who was looking right at her, _right through_ _her_ , straight into her soul, it seemed. Before she could think twice about it, she threw herself at him, her arms circling his neck and he stumbled back, clearly not having expected this reaction from her. She couldn't really blame him because she _had_ been mad at him a lot these last few days, but now, she needed him more than ever. His arms wrapped around her and he held her tightly, letting her cry into his shoulder so that no one would see, even though they all knew what she was doing because she was shaking like a leaf.

She didn't know how long they stood there, but she only pulled away when she heard someone approaching them.

“I didn't mean to,” Father Gabriel said, staring at her with wide eyes when she turned around and glared at him. She lifted her knife again, moving toward the reverend as quickly as she could, wanting to kill him for killing Noah, but Daryl grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back, his arms and his grip strong around her.

“You son of a bitch!” she yelled at Gabriel. “This is all on you! You killed him, you fucking bastard! You put us all in danger and you got Noah killed!”

“Beth, calm down,” Rick tried but she just shook her head, lifting her knife, ready to throw it at the pastor. The throw was weak though and the knife only ended up by his feet. Gabriel looked at it, seeing the way that Noah's blood still coated it.

“It should have been you!” Beth cried out. “I told you not to walk around the woods like that. I _fucking_ told you! It should have been you...” Her screams died out as she just shook her head, knowing that it would be of no use. Her friend was dead and she had been the one who had put him out of his misery. She had seen Gabriel walk out into the woods and she had told Daryl that he shouldn't go after him. If Daryl had, maybe that would have changed things; maybe Noah would still be alive.

Father Gabriel's lip trembled as he lifted his pant leg. Beth's eyes flickered down, looking at his ankle that was covered in blood. There was no mistaking the gaping wound of a walker bite.

“It was me,” Gabriel said, looking down.

Beth saw Rick and the others move forward, but she couldn't bring herself to try and save the reverend. When Morgan assessed that it was already too late; that the flesh was already infected, she was actually _glad_ , which only scared her further. She had never wished this kind of agonizing death upon anyone, which was exactly why she had killed Noah so that he wouldn't have to suffer through it.

She turned around in Daryl's arms and buried her head in the crook of his neck again, seeking comfort in the safety that she found there, knowing that things were going to change after this.

* * *

The man drove the big truck down the highway, staring ahead as he moved his index finger across his lips.

“Ya think that was enough to kill 'em all?” the younger man beside him spoke. “John?”

John shifted in his seat and grabbed the steering wheel a bit tighter, this time with both his hands. “Well, Ben, we just let out seventy of those dead fuckers at those people who killed my men,” John replied, a cruel smile forming on his face. “Took us long enough to find them though. If you woulda been more specific about which way they took when they left the mall, we might've found them sooner.”

“I told ya that I hid in one of the isles until they left,” Ben said. “I had to check if Jamie and the others were still alive!”

“Do ya know _who_ you're talkin' to, kid?” John glared, making the younger man cower in his seat.

“'M sorry, Boss,” he mumbled.

John looked at the road again. He had known that one day or another, them cleaning out the area of walkers and keeping them locked up would be useful. Sure, there weren't many wanderers around this place anymore, but the seventy biters he and Ben had released on those people before, had hopefully served their purpose and killed those people. He would have to send back scouts to check out the farm in a week or two, when he could be sure that there weren't too many of the dead things walking around there.

If those people who had killed his men, and his uncle along with them, were still alive, he would take care of them all, one by one.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Ducks away again*
> 
> I know, I know: I'm a horrible person! Gosh, you have no idea how much it hurt to kill off Noah like that (Father Gabriel was crazy, so I don't really mind losing him...) and having Beth be the one to end him... I'm sorry, because I know many were hoping for a happy chapter, but this really needed to happen. As you can see by the ending scene, the walker attack was connected to the men in the mall, who had been a part of this larger group of men lead by this John character that I made up while I was eating breakfast a couple of months ago when I was plotting this story up. This group of men will come into play once more, but the focus on this story will always be Beth's struggle to accept the new person she is and her and Daryl's relationship. So when these men come back (it will be a while, but there will be hints dropped in other chapter, not necessarily with scenes like the last one here but something at least to let Team Family know that there's something else going on) they will be dealt with in one, hopefully long ass chapter. Then we'll be able to move on from that issue.
> 
> Okay, now that I've gotten that out of the way, I wanna mention that I'm going to bed now and when I wake up, it would be really nice to have some comments (without too much anger!) in my inbox. I mean it when I say that your support means everything to me and that your reviews push me to write! I'm working on chapter 17 now and hopefully, I'll be able to update on Sunday. 17 is another one of my favorites which I hope will at least make up for the angst that was this chapter (toward the end! The beginning was okay, right?)... In other words, there is fluff to come!
> 
> And a badass Beth who doesn't take anyones shit.
> 
> Sorry for the long note, but things needed to be said! But yeah, please take a moment to tell me what you thought about the chapter! Thank you so much for reading and I love all of you! :) xx


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noah's death has shaken Beth which makes her get into an argument with someone in the group. Meanwhile, her sadness over losing her friend brings her closer to Daryl and makes her realize a few things about her growing feelings for the man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I don't have much to say here tonight except for thank you to all of those who have commented this fic so far! 
> 
> Before you get started on reading, I just wanna mention that this chapter is 11k long and that I really hope you'll like it. It's kind of a build up for the next chapter (which I haven't started writing yet since I have so much going on) but it's definitely a favorite of mine! ;) Oh, and so that no one has to keep asking about it: Beth will find out about her and Daryl being alone in chapter 19, but Daryl won't be there so he won't know that she knows!
> 
> Now, please enjoy this extra long chapter, which I sincerely hope you'll like! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 17

Beth sat on the grass, watching as Morgan drove off with the last walkers they had piled up on the truck toward the pits. There was smoke rising to the sky above but fortunately, the smell of burning flesh didn't reach the farmhouse.

She had been sitting there, outside on the field for what felt like hours, just staring at the two, freshly made graves in front of her. They had held a small funeral, or at least something that resembled it, but no one had actually said a word. They all knew that if they said something about how much they were going to miss Noah, they would be forced to address the reverend who had also passed; the man who had ultimately caused Noah's death.

It had only been a day, but they had been quick about digging the graves and piling up the other bodies for both transportation and burning. Beth had been numb the entire time, silently grieving her friend along with everyone else, although she couldn't say that she was going to miss Father Gabriel.

The man had been the reason for the mayhem and the blood spilled yesterday, and Beth absolutely loathed the fact that Noah would forever be buried next to the man who had killed him. No one had talked to her since she had gotten up and gone to sit by Noah's grave that morning. She had been there all day long, not doing anything other than stare at the dirt, thinking about the things she could have done to change what had happened.

If she had stopped Father Gabriel from going out when she had seen him, if she had told Daryl to go after the man, Noah might not have been dead now. On the other hand, maybe Daryl would be, because as Eugene counted the bodies of the roamers, he came up to about seventy walkers which Daryl would have probably been forced to deal with. So no, she couldn't say that she wished she would have let Daryl go after the reverend, but she knew that she should at least have done _something_. She could have warned the others, or informed them that the pastor had gone out again, but would it have been of any use?

Beth would never know, she guessed. The only thing she did know now was that she would never again see Noah, who had become her friend during these months that they had been staying together on the farmhouse.

She heard someone approaching her from behind and at first she thought it might be Daryl, but since she didn't get that feeling she always got in her stomach whenever he was near, she knew that it wasn't.

To her surprise, Daryl hadn't left her side yesterday. It had taken her some time to gather herself after having ended Noah's life and she was certain that if Daryl hadn't been there to hold her up, she would have just sat down and cried all day long. From all the time they had spent together, Beth knew that Daryl wasn't very good with words, but at that time, he had somehow managed to whisper to her that she would be okay eventually and that things like what had happened was normal now and that at least Noah hadn't had to suffer. Some might not have found his words very comforting, but Beth had. She knew that life would go on and that eventually, Noah's name would only be a reminder of a friend that she had lost, but in the world that they lived in, they wouldn't allow themselves to lose themselves in grief. Grief meant instability and instability meant that one wouldn't be able to focus, which in turn would only lead to more death.

But she had allowed herself to grieve, both yesterday in Daryl's arms and today, sitting alone on the field, by Noah's grave.

“Beth,” Maggie said, sounding hesitant as she came to stand by Beth's side. Beth pulled at the grass just a little bit tighter and clenched her jaw, not looking up at her sister. “Beth, please...”

“No,” Beth said. It was short clipped and emotionless, not showing the turmoil of feelings that were shambled up inside of her at the moment.

“Please stop pushing me away,” Maggie continued anyway. She sounded sad and tired, clearly grieving Noah too. Beth knew that her sister was tired of having this distance between them, but Beth still needed time. She might not have her memories, but she sure as hell knew that being family meant that you didn't give up on each other. Maggie had given up on her and she wasn't sure if she would ever be able to just forgive her for that.

“The things that happened yesterday,” Maggie said, her voice being swept up by a calmness all of the sudden. “The things that happened, with Noah and Father Gabriel... I know that it affected you.”

“So?” Beth retorted coldly, finally turning to look up at her sister, who was still standing.

“ _So_ , don't you think that it shows how easy it is to lose the people we love? Don't you think that this argument between us isn't worth it anymore?” Maggie asked.

Beth didn't turn away. She only narrowed her eyes and frowned at her sister, eyebrows creasing together. “Was I not worth looking for? Was I _not worth_ taking a risk for, Maggie?” Beth countered. Yet again a look of sadness covered Maggie's features, but Beth only shook her head. “I told you that I need time. Things between us can't just magically be fixed because of what happened yesterday.”

“Beth, I could have lost you,” Maggie said.

“Well, instead, we lost Noah,” Beth snapped loudly.

That seemed to be enough to stop her sister from talking, at least for a little while. Maggie stood there, her gaze alternating from Beth, who was still sitting on the ground and the cross that they had put up for Noah, even though they didn't know whether he had been religious. It wasn't as if it mattered anymore anyway, but the cross still represented something at least and it was the easiest thing made with the supplies they had.

Beth fiddled with the cross that hung from her left wrist and traced the scar she had there with her thumb. She remembered when Morgan had given her the bracelet and told her to hold on to it; to hold on to faith or hope or whatever the hell there was to hold on to now. At the moment though, it felt as if she didn't have _anything_ to hold on to; like she was just grasping at straws, hoping and wishing that it would be enough to keep her sane in the end.

“You and Noah,” Maggie then said, breaking the silence. “Was there ever anything there?”

Beth shook her head, “We were just friends.”

“Just friends,” Maggie repeated thoughtfully, her voice low.

“ _Good_ friends,” Beth said. “He helped me with some memories and I liked talking to him a lot, but there was never anything else there. He was like a brother to me, I suppose. A lot like Carl is too...”

Memories of the way that Carl had hesitantly approached her once Tyreese had carried Noah's body away, to be wrapped up in a sheet, filled her mind. She had still been holding on to Daryl and as the man had rubbed comforting circles on her back, Carl had come forth, tears falling down his face as well. Beth hadn't known what to do, the guilt becoming too much for her. She knew he had seen her when she had ended Noah's life and she didn't know what anyone was thinking of her then. Although, Carl only took another step forward and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close, telling her that she did the right thing. He had tried to be reassuring, just like Daryl had been, but he too had cried into her shoulder as she had returned his embrace. Daryl had taken a step back then, but he still hadn't walked away. Once Carl had felt a bit better, he had returned to his father and Michonne and embraced the woman as well before following Tyreese back to the house with her, while Rick tried to organize the ones that were left to start piling up the bodies. Beth hadn't thought much about it when she had returned to the safety of Daryl's arms, but the thought that he didn't immediately tense or pull back did cross her mind. It had been almost as if he had expected her to turn to him again, or like he had known that she would. The two of them had sat together for quite some time then, not talking or anything, but merely listening as they began to plan having both Noah and Father Gabriel as soon as possible so that they could start working on getting rid of the other bodies that littered the farmland.

“Okay, I understand,” Maggie said, shaking Beth out of her thoughts again. She had subconsciously begun pulling at the grass again and her fingernails were dirtied with soil, revealing that she had been digging into the dirt.

“I'm just...not ready,” Beth sighed, looking at Noah's grave again.

“It's okay,” Maggie nodded slowly. “I'm sorry about Noah.”

“Yeah,” Beth said, “me too.”

With those words Maggie turned around and walked back to the farmhouse. She was going to be the one to prepare dinner today since Carol who usually took on the task was too upset after having lost Noah. Tyreese had only gone out to help with cleaning up the walkers, but Beth was certain that when they were done with that, he would return to Carol's side yet again.

Beth felt his approach then.

Daryl walked with a little bit more confidence than Maggie, but as he came closer, Beth could feel that he was still a little hesitant. It could be because of the fact that even though he had comforted her yesterday and kept a watchful eye on her today, she still hadn't said much to him. He had to know that she wasn't still angry with him for not saying anything that night on the porch. She couldn't be mad at him for not being able to pick his words as quickly as she did and it wasn't like the situation with Maggie at all, in Beth's mind.

She looked over at him as he stood next to Noah's grave, looking down at the fresh dirt before kneeling down, putting some yellow flowers that she didn't know the name of in front of the cross. For a moment, something inside of Beth's mind flickered. She saw calloused fingers laying flowers on top of a gravestone and then almost _felt_ how those same fingers had intertwined with hers. She swallowed, looking at Daryl, not knowing if she should say something.

In the end, when he moved closer to her and sat down on the ground next to her, still not speaking, she decided to just keep the small memory to herself. It wasn't as if it had been very detailed anyway; just an image of yellow flowers and the feeling of her fingers holding on to someone's hand, as a silent anchor of support.

“I hate it,” she said after a while.

Daryl took out a cigarette from his vest, fiddling with it between his fingers before putting it between his lips. He didn't light it though, just kept it there, as if just having it there had a calming effect on him. He finally turned his head, his eyes connecting with hers. “What?” he asked, his voice rough but with an underlying concern.

“That we buried Gabriel next to him,” she admitted.

“There weren't anywhere else to bury 'em,” he said, touching the cigarette again, but still not moving toward the lighter she knew he kept in his pocket.

“I know,” she mumbled. “That doesn't mean that I have to like it though.”

“Mhm,” Daryl hummed in agreement. “I don't like it either.”

Beth pulled out another tuft of grass, since it was the only outlet she was allowing herself. She knew that there was probably more dirt around her than grass considering that she had been pulling it all day. When she moved to do it again though, Daryl's fingers wrapped around her wrist, stopping her from even touching the straws. She looked up at him, at the unlit cigarette between his lips and then into his eyes that were still intently set on her. The magnetic pull she always seemed to feel when she was around him only magnified and she knew that she would eventually have to look away so that she won't do something stupid that he would probably blame on her grief.

She wanted to say something again, but refrained from it once more. Instead she let her palms lay flat on the ground, her legs stretched out in front of her as she looked at Noah's grave again. Daryl's legs were stretched out as well and once he seemed to have made sure that she wouldn't start pulling the grass again, he too used his hands for support so that he could lean back and look up at the clouds.

Beth didn't know whether she was the one who had moved her hand, or if he had done so, but somehow, their fingers found their way to each other and brushed. She didn't move them away and neither did he, but they didn't make another move from then on. They just sat by Noah's grave, legs stretched out, he looking at the clouds, she looking at the cross, fingertips brushing without either one of them making a fuss about it.

* * *

The two of them walked back to the house together in silence. Daryl had been working on getting the roamer bodies dealt with together with everyone else, but he knew that Beth and Carol had both been too affected by Noah's death to actually do any work. He had gone to check on Carol early in the morning and he had been surprised to find out that she had slept in the room that Tyreese and Sasha shared, while Sasha had occupied her bed. He knew that after the prison, Carol and Tyreese had formed a strong friendship and that the two of them had depended on each other, much like Daryl and Beth had depended on one and other too. He didn't know whether there was more than friendship between his friend and Sasha's brother, but he knew that it also wasn't any of his business. Recently he had been so caught up with his own shit that he hadn't had much time to spend with Carol. He knew that before yesterday's events, she had been happy on the farm, cooking dinner and relaxing at the sense of normalcy that they had all gotten over the last few months. Life on the farm had been easy compared to the months they had spent on the road, and he knew that Carol had been hardened a lot during that time, much like himself.

It had been good to see her happy, because if anything, Daryl thought that his friend deserved to be happy after the shitty life she had had, both before the Outbreak and after. And now, his friend was hurting, and Beth was hurting too and he just didn't know what he could do to make either of them feel better. He knew that Tyreese had Carol covered pretty well. The two of them had talked while they had been piling bodies and the other man had shared that Carol just needed a day or two. Losing Noah like that, losing a kid that she had begun to see as her own... After having lost Sophia and then Lizzie and Mika, he didn't even understand how Carol still managed to stay on her feet.

When he had lost Merle he hadn't let his grief consume him. Instead he had focused on trying to find the Governor who had been the cause of his brother's death. The only thing that he could use to compare Carol's suffering, was the things he had felt while he had been separated from Beth, thinking that she was dead. That had been the only time that he had actually allowed himself to feel the pain and he had almost drowned in it completely. He wasn't sure whether he would still have been here today if they hadn't accidentally run into Morgan that day, only to be reunited with Beth.

He knew that Carol was strong though and he knew that she wouldn't let this crumble her. In just a few days, he was sure that she would be up and cooking again, even though she would never forget Noah or the bond the two of them had had. She had taken the kid under her wing and in the end, he had forgotten everything she had taught him, all because he had pushed Beth out of the way.

Daryl had known it the moment he had heard Beth's scream. He had been killing walkers, intent on not letting one of them get him or anyone else in his family, when he head heard her cry out and his blood had instantly run cold. He had turned around and seen her on the ground and for a second, he had thought that she might have been killed. But then she had sprung up and stabbed the walker that had been biting into Noah's shoulder, right before dropping to the ground with the young man in her arms. She hadn't seen the walker that had stumbled toward her, but Daryl had taken care of it for her, running toward her while killing the biters as he passed them.

Daryl felt horrible about losing Noah, even though he might not have been very close with him. He knew that during the seven months that they had been on the road, the kid had carried a lot of guilt for having left Beth behind in the hospital in the first place. Noah had talked to him about Beth, and cried over her, just as anyone would cry over a friend they had lost.

Just like Beth, Daryl could only blame Father Gabriel for the fact that Noah no longer lived. Rick and Morgan had taken care of the reverend as soon as they could, thinking that he didn't deserved to suffer, even though he had been the one who had led the walkers right up to their wall, which now had a gaping hole in it.

The only positive thing was that the walkers had only broken through the first wall, which meant that they hadn't gotten the chance to come anywhere near the house.

“Daryl, Beth,” Rick called as he walked toward them. His beard was still untrimmed, which Michonne had been complaining about for weeks, but it seemed like the former sheriff had gotten used to having the facial hair and wasn't planning on getting rid of it soon. “I need to talk to ya for a sec,” Rick said when he was close enough. He then turned to Beth, “More specifically you, Beth.”

Daryl knew that Rick was silently telling him that he had just wanted to talk to Beth, but that he knew that Daryl wouldn't just leave the blonde's side now.

“What's up?” Beth asked, looking concerned.

“I wanted to thank you,” Rick admitted, touching the back of his neck as he looked down at her. “You got Carl and Judith to safety yesterday and I just wanted to say that I'm grateful that you were looking out for them.”

Daryl looked at Beth and noticed the faintest hint of a blush creeping up her cheeks.

“It's nothing,” Beth said, offering Rick a weak smile. “I just reacted, I suppose.”

“Still,” Rick nodded curtly. “I owed you a thanks for keeping them safe, but I have something else that I wanna ask, if you have a moment?”

“Sure,” Beth said, looking at him concerned.

“I wanted to know whether you still think it's a good idea for us to stay here on the farm,” Rick admitted. “That was a herd of walkers, after all... We hadn't seen any of them for weeks and then they all just showed up like that at the same time. Do you think it's still safe for us to be here?”

Daryl watched as Beth's frown only deepened. “I don't see a reason why it wouldn't be,” she told him. “Morgan and I were here for months before you came. Even back then there weren't many walkers around. That herd could just have been randomly passing through, a rare occurrence or something...” Beth trailed off, shaking her head. “You wanted to know what I thought and I have nothing to say other than I still want to stay here. We can secure it again and reinforce the walls, make them stronger. It might take some time, but winter's approaching too and I don't think it would be a very good idea for us to be on the roads then.”

Rick nodded and seemed to be contemplating her words. He scratched his beard and turned to look at Daryl, even though Daryl was sure that he knew _his_ reply as well.

“If she ain't goin', I ain't goin',” Daryl told him anyway, not daring to look at Beth now. He could feel her eyes on him though and he knew that his words had surprised her. Although, Rick on the other hand didn't look fazed at all by them.

“I'm gonna call a meeting tonight,” Rick said. “I just wanted to know what the two of you thought beforehand. Morgan said something similar to what you said, Beth, but we still need to see what everyone else thinks.”

“That makes sense,” Beth agreed. “Tonight then?”

Rick nodded, still looking deep in thoughts, “The sooner the better.”

* * *

Beth leaned back against the wall, arms crossed over her chest as she watched everyone gather in the living room. Rick was whispering in hushed tones to Michonne who was holding Judith who was fast asleep in her arms. Carl sat on the floor with Tara, fiddling with the woman's yo-yo while they waited for everyone else. Eugene joined them when he walked in with Abraham and Rosita and Glenn and Maggie followed shortly after, sitting on the couch next to Carol and Tyreese. Beth tried not to look at Carol, but it was difficult not to. The older woman was holding on to Tyreese's hand, her eyes red-rimmed and sad. Beth had talked to her a little bit earlier and asked her how she was doing. She felt bad for having been the one to just take charge and kill Noah the way she had, but Carol had stopped her before she had had a chance to start apologizing for it, telling her that she had made the right choice.

“Everyone's here,” Rick spoke, breaking through the hushed whispers that had begun filling the room after Sasha finally joined them too. Beth felt Daryl shifting next to her, his crossbow strapped around his shoulders. Briefly, she wondered how he could just carry it around all the time like that, considering that she knew just how heavy it could get after a while.

“What's this meeting about?” Sasha asked as she sat on the edge of the couch, on the other side of Carol.

“We have some decisions to make,” Rick stated. “Now that things have calmed down again, we need to discuss what our next move is gonna be.”

“Next move?” Abraham snorted, crossing his arms. “I think it's clear that we can't stay here anymore. The wall we worked on for weeks is down and two of us are dead. This place ain't safe no more.”

Beth turned her head and looked over at Morgan who was standing on the other side of her. He looked at her as well, but she noticed how he turned his head to his side a little, giving her a short shake of his head, telling her not to speak yet. She narrowed her eyes at him, but turned back to look at Rick and Abraham.

“That's a decision that we all need to make together,” Rick pointed out. “We have to take everyone into consideration here.”

“Leaving would be the best thing for everyone,” Abraham argued, looking around. “Is there really anyone here who wants to stay after that herd of roamers found this place and almost killed the lot of us?”

Beth looked around at everyone, noticing how no one was speaking. She glanced over at Morgan again and then turned to look at Daryl, who was standing with his head bowed down, as if in deep thoughts. She took a step forward, “I think we should stay.”

Rick and Abraham both turned to look at her then, and she was certain that everyone else was also looking at her too.

“There are other places out there too,” Abraham said. “ _Safer_ places.”

“This place was safe,” Beth countered. “It was safe until Gabriel screwed it up. I told everyone that we needed to keep an eye on him, but no one listened to me then. Listen to me _now_. We should stay here.”

Abraham scoffed, “How the fuck can you say this place is still safe? The damn wall is _down_ , or didn't ya hear me, _girl_?”

Beth's eyebrows furrowed together and she clenched her jaw, taking a step toward the gargantuan man. “The wall can be _fixed_ ,” she told him angrily. “We can rebuild it within just a few days–”

“And when there's another walker attack? What then, huh?” Abraham interrupted, giving her a glare as he took a step toward her, towering over her small frame. “You're not the one runnin' this group.”

“Last time I checked, that wasn't your job either,” Beth said, not backing down. “We're part of the same group and we decide things _together_. Everyone else should get to say what they think too.”

She looked at the others who had been watching her exchange with Abraham. Eugene was the first one to clear his throat and speak.

“I agree with Beth on this one,” he stated. “We hadn't seen walkers for weeks and that herd wasn't that big.”

“We lost two men!” Abraham protested loudly, causing Judith to fuss in Michonne's arms.

The woman glared at him and hissed, “Stop raising your voice.”

“That little girl is the reason we should leave,” Abraham continued, his voice still loud, clearly ignoring Michonne. “There has to be a place where she can be safe!”

“She _is_ safe!” Beth exclaimed, taking another step toward the redhead. “ _Here_ ,” she added. “What happened could have been avoided. It was Gabriel who led the herd to our gates. They could have just passed right past the farm!”

Abraham turned around and faced her again. “How many times do I have to tell ya? I don't take no orders from you, _girl!_ Who the fuck do ya think you are? Just because you survived a damn shot to the head, you're suddenly the one who makes all the decisions?” he asked, his eyes narrowed, hands balled into fists. Beth noticed how Glenn and Tyreese stood up from the couch, discretely moving toward Abraham. Rick's hand was twitching as well, almost as if he wanted to reach out and grab Abraham's shoulder to force him to take a step back from Beth.

Beth was sick and tired of it all. She was tired of everyone treating her like she would break if she suddenly got all of her memories back at once, or as if she was something fragile after having survived a head shot. She hated that they were all treating her like some little girl that didn't know anything about protecting herself and it annoyed her to no end because she _did_ know how to protect herself.

“I'm not saying that,” Beth argued. “I'm just stating my opinion and sticking to it. This isn't about what you want, Abraham, and it isn't about what I want either. This is about all of us.”

“Well, I thought we should have left months ago,” Abraham sneered. “Maybe Noah would still be alive if we had!”

_Smack!_

Beth didn't even know what came over her. All she knew that the second Abraham had mentioned Noah, the anger that she had tried to keep inside all day just exploded in her chest and her arm swung out, her fist connecting with Abraham's jaw. The man yelled out and Judith began crying and suddenly, Beth felt Daryl and Morgan's hands wrapping around her wrists to pull her back. She was seething.

“You don't get to say that!” Beth yelled at Abraham, who was touching his nose, which must have gotten hit as well since it was bleeding profusely. Her knuckles were aching, but she ignored the pain as she struggled against Morgan and Daryl's grip on her. “You don't get to pull Noah into this! Noah's gone and we have to decide what to do, not talk about what could have been!”

“You little–” Abraham began taking a step toward her, but Rick, Glenn and Tyreese moved behind him quickly. Although, they didn't really have to because Daryl released his grip on Beth and took a step forward, stepping between her and the other man. She wasn't scared of Abraham; she really wasn't, but she had heard about how he had lost his temper and beat Eugene half to death when it had been revealed that the man had been lying about a cure. Out of all the people in the group, Abraham was the one she had gotten to know the least, barely having shared one conversation with him since they had all come to the farm.

“Back off,” Daryl grunted. He had moved so quickly that Beth wondered whether he had been ready to intervene the entire time she had been arguing with Abraham. His crossbow was lifted, aimed at the other man and Abraham shifted his angry glare from Beth and turned it to Daryl instead.

“Of course you're on _Blondie's_ side,” Abraham snorted.

“Told ya to back the fuck off,” Daryl repeated, neither his voice nor his angry mask wavering. Beth pulled her hand away from Morgan, who seemed a little bit stunned by the turn of events.

“What did ya think I was gonna do? _Hit_ her?” Abraham wondered as he took a step back. Daryl didn't speak, and behind Abraham, Glenn, Rick and Tyreese seemed to relax a bit now that Abraham's tone had lowered.

“Abe would never,” Rosita spoke up, shaking her head as she looked at Daryl with something akin to shock on her face.

“People do bad stuff when they're angry,” Daryl muttered before slowly lowering his bow. He took a step back, closer to Beth, who was staring at Abraham's bleeding nose, almost fixedly.

“I ain't a little girl,” she told the man, wanting everyone in the room to hear her as well. “I haven't been for months. You guys aren't the only ones who were on the roads for a long time before finding this place... I'm not willing to lose what we can all still have here just to start looking for something that may not even exist, especially not now when Winter is approaching,” she said, eyes focused on Abraham's. His cheeks seemed a little bit more red, but he didn't say anything. “I'm staying,” Beth stated, looking around again before once again settling on Abraham. “If you wanna go, I'm not gonna stop you. That's your choice to make but I've already made mine.”

She turned around and walked out of the room, ignoring Maggie and Rick who called out for her to stay. Clenching her hand, she winced as she felt  the stinging there. She had lost her temper earlier when she had punched Abraham and she knew that she had been out of line, but he had been too. Noah was still too fresh of a wound to mention so casually; as if his death hadn't even mattered. Beth wasn't sure what she would have done if Morgan and Daryl hadn't held her back. She knew that she wasn't very big compared to Abraham, but she was certain that her anger would have fueled her enough to at least inflict some more pain on the man. The fact that she had given him a nose bleed was something at least, but she sincerely hoped that everyone in the group would see sense in what she was saying. This farm was too good to just give up on so easily. It was their chance at making a place for themselves where they could be safe until something changed in the world. If it didn't and they were cursed to keep living in this hell, then she didn't know what they would be able to do, other than trying to live on.

Beth entered her bedroom and shut the door,  changing into her pajamas before lying down on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. She didn't know how much time had passed exactly when the door opened and Michonne stepped inside, carrying Judith who was once again asleep in her arms. Beth watched the baby and her lips twitched up in a half smile, no matter how upset she still was.

“We're staying,” Michonne told her, walking over to the bed, sitting down on it. Beth didn't speak, but she did raise a questioning eyebrow at the other woman. “We voted and everyone agreed that we should give this place another chance. You're right about winter nearing and it's just too big of a risk to take to be on the roads when it's finally here.”

“What about Abraham?” Beth asked, her thumb brushing over her sore knuckles.

“He's pissed that you gave him a nose bleed,” Michonne smirked, “but he's agreed to staying too since everyone else is. It's not just his jaw that's bruised though. His ego took quite a blow as well.”

“No one opposed?” Beth frowned.

Michonne once again shook her head, “You were very persuasive. Everyone can see the woman you've become... You're strong and you're a survivor. Even if you aren't the one running the group, I don't think anyone will have doubts about involving you in the decision making from now on.”

“I know I snapped,” Beth sat up then, “and I know it might not have been very mature, but I just hate that everyone is treating me like they have to protect me or something. I'm not gonna get myself killed.”

Michonne looked down at the sleeping girl in her arms, her finger brushing against Judith chubby cheek. “Abraham wasn't very mature either,” Michonne stated. “No one is blaming you for defending yourself.” Then she snorted, “Not that anyone would dare to now that they know that Dixon has taught you how to pack a real punch.”

Beth smiled, feeling her cheeks heat up a little. “Well, Daryl should give me another lesson in how not to snap at people and almost break their noses when it isn't necessary,” she said.

“I don't think Daryl is the right person to teach you that,” Michonne shook her head. “Does your hand hurt?”

“A little, but I'll be fine,” Beth shrugged. “You should go to bed though... Judith too.”

“Yeah,” Michonne nodded, looking down at the child she was holding. The little girl was clutching one of her dreadlocks in her tiny fist, mouth hung open with some drool trailing down her chin. Beth smiled at how adorable she looked. “I'll see you tomorrow then,” Michonne said, standing up.

“Good night, Michonne,” Beth said, not bothering to get up from the bed.

“Night, Beth,” Michonne returned in a hushed tone before exiting the room, closing the door behind her. Beth stared at it for a while before leaning back down again. She turned on her side and tried to close her eyes, but images of Noah's bleeding shoulder flashed in her mind and she opened them quickly. Glancing over at the door, she bit her lip and hesitated for a moment before finally standing up. She quickly grabbed her pillow and her blanket, stepping out of the room before she could talk herself out of it, walking right up to Daryl's door.

* * *

As Rick led the vote, Daryl watched as everyone slowly raised their hand to show their support for Beth. He didn't even have to raise his hands because he knew that everyone in the room was aware of where he stood. He kept his eyes trained on Abraham though, who was also looking at everyone in the room. When the other man agreed to stay as well, Daryl continued to look at him with narrowed eyes, still mad at his reaction toward Beth.

Daryl had been quite surprised when Beth had punched Abraham like that, but at the same time there had been some pride that had welled inside of him, because he had seen some of the things that he had taught her in her move too. Although, he had also seen that her anger had gotten the better of her and she hadn't held her fist correctly, which must have resulted in pain for her too. He had been too busy holding her back together with Morgan though and when he had later stepped between her and Abraham, he had gotten distracted and forgotten to check on her. By the time he had gotten his own temper under control, Beth had left and Rick had told them all that it was time to vote.

Michonne had gone to talk to Beth, to check on her and while Daryl had collected his crossbow, Abraham had tried to approach him to apologize, but Daryl had barely even looked at him when he had walked away and gone upstairs as well. He had taken a shower and thought hard about the things that had happened these last two days. The training session in the barn, the walker attack, Noah and Father Gabriel dying... _Beth_.

She seemed to be the common denominator in all of his thoughts nowadays. Whichever way he tried to turn his mind, it always came back to her in the end. When he had finally gone to his own room, he could hear Michonne and Beth talking in Beth's room, but the voices were muffled through the door. He wondered how she was, but he didn't know whether it would be okay for him to go to her and check on her. If anything, he figured that he could do so tomorrow instead and give her some space if that was what she needed tonight... Women liked that, didn't they? Space?

He thought about it for so long that he almost missed the light tap on his door. Instantly, he was on alert, grabbing a hold of his hunting knife that he had on the small desk and he cautiously walked over to the door, opening it slowly, and just a little bit.

Of all the various things he had expected, he hadn't once thought about seeing Beth standing there, clutching her pillow and her blanket, long blonde hair gathered up in a loose bun on the top of her head, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. She was wearing those flannel pajamas again as well as her gray hoodie. He met her eyes only when he realized that he had been checking her out and he frowned, mostly at himself, although it only served to make her look even more nervous.

“You okay?” he asked, opening the door a little more.

Beth nodded, but swallowed, “Is it okay if I stay here tonight? With you?” She had blurted the words out and he didn't fail to notice how her cheeks turned a darker shade of pink. As if she had just realized what she had said, she shook her head and looked down, a sad smile spreading on her lips. “You know what? Never mind, I'm just being silly.” She started to turn around and walk back to her room, and Daryl knew that he should let her go, but his hand shot out and wrapped around her wrist before he had time to question himself. Instantly, she looked up at him again, their eyes connecting as her lips parted. She seemed surprised and Daryl swallowed.

“Okay,” he said, barely recognizing his own voice. “Ya can stay... If ya want.”

He was sure that he was making the worst mistake possible, but when Beth smiled at him again, this time not only with sadness in her eyes, but also gratitude, he couldn't bring himself to care.

Letting go of her wrist, he stepped aside, allowing her entry. She brushed past him and he ignored the way his heart was thumping in his chest when their bodies touched just briefly. She stood by the chair that she usually sat in when she came to visit him. Not that it was such a common event, but whenever she had come to his room, she had always made sure that there was distance between them; except for that time when she had sat next to him on the bed.

She looked at him expectantly, like she wanted to know where she was supposed to lay down or what to do next. Daryl moved to the small bed and grabbed his pillow and his blanket, throwing them both on the floor. “Take the bed,” he told her.

“Daryl, I can't make you sleep on the floor,” she told him, but he merely shook his head.

“I've slept on worse,” he said.

“So have I,” she returned, not moving from where she stood.

They looked at each other for another moment, but he wasn't going to just back down. There were at least some things he could still control when she was around and he wasn't going to give in on this one. He _couldn't_ sleep next to her. There was no way that he would be able to do it without there being any awkwardness or tension or whatever, and he knew without a doubt that he would probably do something to mess everything up eventually. She seemed to understand that he wasn't going to give, so she sighed and walked over to the small bed and threw her pillow down before sitting on it. She looked at him again, almost expectantly, but he moved to the floor and stretched the blanket out before putting his pillow on top of it. When he sat down, she was still sitting in the bed, her knees a few inches away from his shoulder as he sat with his legs stretched out in front of him.

“Why are ya here, Beth?” he asked her then, not daring to look at her.

“I want to be here,” she replied effortlessly, but he was sure that if he looked up at her face, he would see her blushing.

“Are ya scared of Abraham?” he questioned, not being able to help himself. He knew that there had been a time when Abraham had snapped at Eugene and nearly killed the man for lying about being a scientist and he also knew that Rosita had once or twice pulled back from the man after being yelled at. It was no secret that Abraham had issues with his temper, but just as Rosita had said when Daryl had stepped between Abe and Beth, he knew that Abraham would never lay hands on a woman like that. Nevertheless, Daryl had reacted and he wasn't sure if he was ready to forgive Abraham for even looking at Beth funnily, or for yelling at her and calling her names. So he had to ask Beth; if she had been afraid and if that was the reason that she had sought him out tonight.

Beth sighed and he felt her move as she laid down on the bed. He glanced at her and noticed that she was laying on her side, close to the edge of the bed, so that she could see him better. She blinked a few times before answering. “I'm not scared of him,” she said. “I just... I just wanted to be with someone tonight that I know I can trust.”

He wanted to ask her why she hadn't gone to Morgan, or anyone else for that matter. He knew that Beth was close enough with both Tara and Michonne and if she wanted to, he was sure that Tara would invite her to sleep in the same room as her. The selfish part of him won though, because he didn't want to know. He didn't want to hear her reason for choosing him over everyone else, and a small part of him, almost wished that it deep down was for the same reason that he would always choose her.

But he couldn't tell her that. He couldn't tell her how he felt or the thoughts he sometimes thought when she was around because he just knew that she would run the other way. If she ever found out, things between them would be awkward and he didn't want that. He wanted her to be happy because she deserved to be after all the shit she had gone through. If he got to be a part of her life, at least for a little while longer; if he got the chance to see her happy, he knew that he would be too. It didn't have to be with him because he knew that she deserved so much better, but he also knew that he wouldn't just be able to let her go. If it ever came to it though, there was no question that he would, if anything, for her.

Daryl laid down on his side too, so that he could look up at her while she looked down at him. Behind her, the moon was reflecting down, illuminating the room, making it look almost as if there was a halo around her messy hair. Eventually, after some time passed, he noticed that she wasn't falling asleep either. The two of them were just laying there, looking at each other without speaking. Yet, it felt like a thousand conversations were being held between their connected gazes, but he didn't even know what he was silently telling her.

When she moved, she reached down to him, her small hand taking a hold of his rougher one, covering it. He glanced down, noticing how pale her skin looked compared to his, and how small and soft her fingers were as she slowly began tracing the back of his hand. When she passed the circular mark on his hand, she paused and he just couldn't bring himself to look away from her, trying his hardest not to give anything away.

She touched the scar that he had given himself, when he had been desperate to feel something, _anything_ , but her eyes didn't stray from his. There was nothing in there that gave away what she was thinking, even though he knew she must be thinking something. Maybe she was wondering how he had gotten it; if someone else had given it to him or if she suspected the truth, that he had once felt so low that he had done something that he had never thought he would be able to do.

His eyes began dropping though; the tiredness of the last two days finally setting in. He looked up at her again and noticed that her eyes were half closed too, but she still held his hand firmly in hers. After another while, he closed his eyes, letting the exhaustion take over and the last thing on his mind was how good it felt to have Beth there with him, alive and holding his hand, like it was the most normal thing in the world for the two of them.

* * *

Beth wrinkled her nose a little as the light slipped through the curtains, reaching her eyes. While it felt good, it was also incredibly annoying because she had hoped to maybe sleep in a bit today. She still hadn't woken up completely when her eyes fluttered open and she was met by a strange sight.

She wasn't in her room, she realized, when nothing was in the right place and everything around her seemed a bit smaller. The night before returned to her when her arm started aching slightly because she remembered going to Daryl's room, asking to sleep there for the night and then holding his hand until she fell asleep.

Turns out, she hadn't let go of it once during the night. She hadn't moved during the night so she looked down and saw that he was still asleep, their fingers intertwined. The night before she had been so deep in though about everything that had happened, both with Noah and with Abraham, that she hadn't thought about it much when she had begun tracing made up patterns on the back of Daryl's hand. The fact that he hadn't immediately pulled away and allowed her to touch him like that meant so much to her, but she knew that there had been one particular moment when she had frozen; when she had touched the mark on his hand that was without a doubt a cigarette burn.

She had looked at him then, doing her best to remain passive, although her emotions were welling on the inside along with a thousand questions. How had he gotten it? Who had hurt him like that? Had he done it to himself?

Daryl didn't seem like the kind of person who would do such a thing to himself, but at the same time, what did she actually know about him? He had been through so much, probably even more than she had, and at the of the day, who was she to judge him if he had gone down that road once when she had been there too, even if she didn't remember it?

She was so deep in her thoughts that she hadn't noticed that Daryl too had woken up and was looking up at her from his make-shift bed on the floor. It wasn't until she felt him squeeze her hand that she looked at his face and saw his stormy eyes focused on her, still looking half-asleep.

Neither of them spoke, but she felt like they didn't need to. There was once again a silent conversation passing between them and she was content with that. It felt good to know that they had passed some kind of line that had been between the two of them before tonight and before everything that had happened with Noah and Father Gabriel. Beth knew that things were beginning to change, if they hadn't already begun doing so a long time ago, and she simply hadn't caught on to it until now.

But there was no denying it anymore.

Something was different about Daryl. _He_ was different from the rest of the group and the way she felt about him was different too. There was something there that she didn't know how to explain because it was like even when she was mad at him, she wanted to be close to him and even if he tried to push her away, she just wouldn't let him do it.

It wasn't just a simple attraction to him. He looked good, sure. There was something about that roughness when he spoke and the way he moved around the farm when he was working and those eyes that would probably make the coldest person melt... But there was something else there too. It was the fact that he seemed to think that he was both complicated and simple at the same time, and the way that he didn't know the effect he had on her or the way that she looked up to him because of his strength. It was the way her heart always beat faster when he was around her and the way that she just _knew_ when he was close and the way that he always seemed to be the first person she sought out in a crowd... All of those things, made this _thing_ that they had going on between them, different.

Or perhaps, she was just imagining it all and it was one-sided.

Beth looked down at Daryl and noticed that he didn't shy away or tear his hand away from hers. Instead, he just seemed to grip it a little tighter, as if reassuring her that he was there and that he wouldn't be going anywhere without her. She recalled him telling Rick that he wouldn't leave the farm if Beth didn't go and the sudden urge to just lean down from the bed and kiss him came over her. She looked at him though and then at their hands, and she just knew that it was too soon for that. Beth was amazed though, that there was no awkwardness there at all between them. She would have expected _something_ to feel strange but it just didn't. It felt like the most natural thing in the world, just like them holding hands did too.

“We should get up,” Daryl suddenly said, his voice still thick from sleep. Beth nodded, but didn't move and neither did he. They stayed there for another moment like that; her in his bed and he on his floor, fingers intertwined, looking at each other as if they had both realized the reason to why it had always felt like something was missing.

Beth smiled widely down at him though, when she realized that for the first time in a very long time, she had slept through the night without having any nightmares.

* * *

They had gotten up eventually and Beth had gone back to her room, carrying her blanket and her pillow with her while Daryl had made his own bed again. While he had changed into another shirt, he hadn't been able to stop thinking about the way Beth had been looking at him when he had finally woken up. No one had ever looked at him like that and he felt like a damn teenager again for how his stomach kept fluttering whenever he remembered the small smile that had been on her face while she had been in deep thoughts.

He didn't know what she had been thinking about, but it must have been something good. When he had squeezed her hand and she had noticed that he was awake, her cheeks had yet again turned a light shade of pink, but there hadn't been anything awkward about it, which was strange all on its own, because Daryl had always believed himself to be an awkward person, especially when it came to Beth.

There would without a doubt be discussions about making a run within the next few days, since they needed things to re-build the wall where it had fallen, so Daryl used that to distract himself from thinking of Beth and the small moments they had shared together since just yesterday. Winter would be here sooner or later, which meant that he needed to plan for a bigger hunt as well now before all the animals became scarce.

He met Beth in the hallway when he got out of his room and if he didn't know any better, he would say that she had actually been waiting for him. He did know better though, but the thought was still there and when he looked at her, he didn't fail to notice how she stood a bit taller and looked right at him, confirming that she wanted to walk downstairs _with_ him.

Who was he to protest?

Carrying his crossbow with him, the two of them quickly fell into step together and walked toward the stairs. He let Beth walked down first but cursed himself and his eyes when they fell on her ass as she descended. Could anyone really blame him when she was wearing those jeans though? He shook his head at himself and looked ahead, at anything other than Beth Greene's ass, before the two of them headed for the kitchen where they could hear everyone else talking.

Before they had a chance to step inside though, Abraham came out of the kitchen and stopped in his tracks when he saw Beth. Daryl's fingers tightened a little on his crossbow, but he made no move when Beth stopped walking as well.

Abraham reached up and scratched his head, “Uh, Beth... I, eh, wanted to apologize for last night.” Daryl didn't take his eyes from the other man though, but he could sense the way Beth tensed a little beside him. “I was outta line for speakin' to ya like that,” Abraham continued, actually sounding sincere. “I know I said some things that I shouldn't and that you're just lookin' out for our group... So I s'pose, I'm sorry.”

Daryl waited patiently while Beth seemed to think it over. He didn't say anything and he most certainly didn't stop glaring at Abraham just because he had apologized to Beth.

“You were a jerk,” Beth stated, sounding impossibly calm. Daryl suppressed the urge to snicker at the way that Abraham's mouth fell open a little as he looked at the young woman who was speaking to him with not even a hint of fear in her voice. Daryl noticed the purplish bruise on Abraham's jaw and some small remnants of his nosebleed from last night in his nostrils and he couldn't help but once again think that it had been well deserved.

“But, I suppose I can forgive you,” Beth shrugged, sounding indifferent. Abraham nodded, clearly deciding to take what was given to him and Daryl thought that that was the wisest thing he had done in weeks. He made sure to give him one last glare for good measure when he passed him though, to clarify in silence that if Abraham ever did anything to Beth again, he should start sleeping with one eye open.

Inside the kitchen, Rick and Morgan were trying to get everyone organized. Eugene was listing all the things they would need to fix the wall and Tyreese had practically forced Carol out of bed to help make inventory of the food they had left.

“Within the next few days, a bigger group of us is gonna have to go on a run to that hardware store where we found all the material we needed for the wall last time,” Rick said. “We need as many hands as possible but we can't leave the house unattended too.”

“I'll be goin' on a hunt,” Daryl informed them. “We need more meat to smoke an' if Eugene gets the freezer workin', I'll need to go out a few more times before it starts snowin'.”

Rick nodded, taking it into consideration, “That means that Daryl's out. Are there any volunteers for the run?”

“I'll go,” Abraham said.

“Me too,” Glenn spoke up, looking over at Maggie. Daryl guessed that Maggie didn't like Glenn leaving again after such a big herd of walkers passed by, but once Glenn decided on something, there wasn't any changing his mind.

They went around the table and everyone who wanted to go on the run spoke up. In the end, it was Abraham, Glenn, Rick, Michonne, Rosita, Tara, Sasha and Tyreese who would be going. Carol and Maggie would be staying with Carl and Judith and Morgan would also stick around on the farm to keep an eye on things while Eugene would work on the freezer.

“Then it's settled,” Rick said, clapping his hands together. “Daryl's gonna go huntin' and the rest of us will–”

“I wanna go on the run too,” Beth interrupted Rick. Daryl almost dropped his crossbow when he turned to look at her. She was still standing next to him, but she was leaning against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest as she kept her eyes solely on Rick.

“No,” Maggie stood from her chair, instantly protesting. Daryl had to admit, he agreed with her. He didn't like the idea of Beth going on a run without him there to watch her back. “Last time you went out there you barely came back alive.”

Beth's eyes settled on her sister and her eyes narrowed, “Last time I checked, I had a mind of my own and can do whatever I want.” Maggie gaped at her, but Beth only turned and looked at Rick again. “I wanna go, Rick. I can help.”

“You could just go hunting with Daryl instead!” Maggie protested again. She looked over at Daryl, as if silently asking him to say something, but he didn't want to. No matter how much he didn't want Beth to go without him, the young woman was right. She did have a mind of her own and she could do what she wanted. He was a bit disappointed that she wouldn't be going with him on his hunt, but on the other hand, maybe that would be better? It would give him a chance to clear his head and wrap his mind around the things that he had been feeling lately. Maybe he would finally be able to decide what he wanted?

“Daryl doesn't need me to help him hunt,” Beth stated, “but Rick said we needed more hands on the run. I have two to offer and I'm going on that damn run. If Rick says it's okay, that is.” Beth looked at Rick again who seemed to be thinking about it.

“Beth knows how to watch her own back out there,” Morgan put in. “The hardware store has already been cleared by us before, so there shouldn't be any walkers there anyway.”

“And those men?” Maggie asked. “What if their group find them?”

“They were way down South,” Abraham spoke up. “'Sides, we killed them all. No reason for their group to be able to locate us this far away.”

“I don't like it,” Maggie said, shaking her head.

“It's not about you liking it, Maggie,” Beth snapped. “This is about what's better for our group. Morgan says the store has been cleared and it isn't as if I'll be going in alone. It's my choice to make.”

Daryl looked over at Rick and noticed that his friend had been looking at him the entire time, probably torn between what to do. After a moment, Daryl gave him a short nod which he knew that only Rick would catch.

“If Beth wants to go, I ain't gonna stop her,” Rick said a second later. He turned to Beth then, “If ya wanna go, ya can.”

“I wanna go,” Beth nodded, giving Rick a grateful smile. “Thank you.”

Rick only nodded at her and despite Maggie's concerned protests, the meeting continued as they began discussing which vehicles to take with them and whether they would have enough gas to make the run.

When it was all over and all the discussions had been settled, Daryl walked out on the porch, itching to have a smoke. He wasn't surprised when Beth followed him outside and sat down on the steps while he stood leaning against one of the pillars, staring right ahead at the field and the place where the wall had been breached.

“I don't like the idea of you going out hunting alone,” Beth said, “but I know that you need it. I would need it too.”

Daryl didn't look at her as he nodded and spoke, “You're right, but it has to be done.”

He didn't speak as he took out the cigarette that he hadn't lit the day before, putting it between his lips before reaching for his lighter. Once it was lit, he drew in the smoke, held it for a moment before blowing it out of his nostrils. “I don't like the idea of you goin' on the run without me there,” he then admitted, his voice quieter than he would have wanted it to be.

“I know,” Beth said, “but it has to be done.”

He looked at her then, snuffing out the cigarette before meeting her eyes. She was looking up at him, her chin propped up in her hands while her elbows rested on her knees. He sat down next to her and she scooted over a bit but remained close enough so that their knees brushed. Finally, he built up the guts to just reach over and take her hand. It was clearly becoming somewhat of an addiction for him already.

“We can't stay behind just because we want to,” she told him then, turning to look at him.

He wondered when her face had gotten so close to his.

For another moment, they just looked at each other before he pulled back a little because the feeling of her hot breath grazing his chin became just a little too much for him.

“I remembered something,” she whispered then. “This morning, after I left your room... It's just something I think my Daddy used to say, but I think it's fitting, you know?”

He knew what she was referring to immediately and he felt his lips tug up a little as he remembered the words that Hershel had always said to them before he had been murdered.

“'We all got jobs to do,'” Daryl said, liking the way that Beth's eyes just seemed to brighten when he confirmed that her father had indeed loved that phrase.

B eth moved forward then, startling Daryl so much that he almost jumped, but he just stared at her when her head came to rest on his shoulder. He knew that he should probably worry about someone seeing them from inside, but he didn't. He relaxed a little when Beth's thumb once again brushed against the rough burn mark on his hand, her movements having a calming effect on him instead of making him hate himself for all the things he had done wrong in the world.

“We all got jobs to do,” Beth echoed, her voice quiet but content. Daryl knew that they should probably go inside again, but he figured that staying out there with Beth for just a little while longer, wouldn't hurt anyone.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo? What did you think? :)
> 
> Beth grieving Noah, being mad about Father Gabriel, losing her temper with Abraham (Who apologized, so don't hate on him! And if you still do, there are some things happening in the next chapter that I think will make up for his douchiness in this one!) and then all the Bethyl sweetness, right? As you can see, Beth and Daryl are going to be separated when he goes on a hunt and she goes on a run. They'll both have more time to reflect on their growing feelings, but as usual, I have things planned... *evil laughter in the distance*
> 
> I would very much like to know what you liked the most about this chapter and what you're hoping to see in the next one! Don't worry though because even if Daryl and Beth will be separated for the most part of the next chapter, there will be a lot of Bethyl there too as well as this one scene that... Well, I'll leave it at that and hope you guys review enough to speed up my writing process! :)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and don't forget to show your support by leaving a few words at least! Love ya'll! xx


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl goes on his hunting trip and makes a concerning find, while Beth goes on a run and makes a mistake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUUUUYS! I know I said that I wouldn't be posting tonight a couple of hours ago on tumblr, but I just didn't want to fail you lovely readers who keep sending your support to me by showing your love for this fic! So, it's 1 A.M where I live, I'm tired as fuck, have to get up in just a few hours for school, but I did it you guys: I finished chapter 18 and I'm posting it for you lot! And it's 11k long again and one of my favorite chapters! :)
> 
> So, with all that in mind, I hope you can look past any misspellings and or typos in general. It's late and I did a quick little spell check, but you know how computers are and how brains are when it's this late... Either way, I really hope you guys will like this chapter and please, please, please, SHOW your support by commenting, because chapters take hours to write, but only half a minute to review and the support is always appreciated! :)
> 
> And I'm sorry for not having had time to reply to your reviews, but I've read them all and I just wanna say that this story will go on 'til probably a total of 28 something chapters or so, so there's still a bit left!
> 
> Now, please enjoy! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

#  Chapter 18

Beth zipped up her jacket and grabbed her knives, sheathing them all in their respective places in her belt. Lifting her foot onto the chair in her bedroom, she took the smallest and thinnest knife and hid it inside her boot in the small place that she had cut out herself for it.

She brushed away a stray piece of hair that had fallen in front of her face before taking her backpack and heading out of her room, closing it behind her before walking downstairs to meet up with the others. She spotted Rick and Morgan talking about something and when she walked up to them, she wrapped her arm around Morgan's waist and leaned up to press a light kiss against his cheek. Morgan grinned down at her before continuing his conversation with Rick regarding which routes would take them to the hardware store the fastest and Beth turned around and walked over to Carol and Maggie who were giving out bottles of water.

“Good morning, Beth,” Carol said, still looking sad despite the brave face she put on. Beth didn't blame her since it had just been four days since Noah had been killed and she too was still a bit unbalanced after everything.

“Mornin',” Beth replied. “I can take a few bottles in my backpack,” she told them, glancing over at her sister who was looking anywhere but at her at the moment. Beth knew that Maggie was upset about her going on this run, but Beth knew that she needed it. She had to get away from the farmhouse, if only for a little while because she just had to clear her mind.

“You can take two and some food, unless you want to carry more than you need?” Carol questioned a small smile on her face.

“Well, I won't be carrying it, will I? I mean, we'll be driving there after all,” Beth shrugged. “Did Daryl get his things yet?” she asked then, looking around since she hadn't seen him yet.

“He was here just a few minutes ago,” Maggie said, finally looking up at her. “You just missed him.”

Beth looked over at her, “Did he say which way he would be going and when he'd be back?”

“If you wanna talk to him, I'm sure you'll be able to catch up to him,” Maggie told her. “After all, you're all about making your own decisions now, aren't you?”

Beth sighed and shook her head, “Don't start, Maggie...”

“Well, it isn't as if you're gonna ask me what I think about anything anymore,” Maggie said. “Just because I made a mistake and gave up right after Daddy died, and I didn't want to get my hopes up that you might still be alive somewhere, I don't get a say in anything anymore, right?” Maggie wiped her hands on a rag and then threw it on the table. “I'm not tellin' you to forgive me, but I want you to know that no matter how angry you might be with me, we're still family and I want you to be safe. I don't like you going on runs and I'm still your big sister. I think that next time, you should maybe at least talk to me before so I know what to expect.”

Maggie turned on her heel then and stormed off inside the house, leaving Beth and Carol behind. Beth looked over at Carol, who sent her an apologetic look. “I think she's still getting used to the fact that you don't need her to take care of you anymore,” Carol told her. “But she's right about Daryl though. You might still be able to catch up to him before he leaves.”

Beth nodded, glancing toward the door again before looking back at Carol. “Thanks, Carol,” she said. “Can I leave my bag here for just a sec?”

Carol looked down and smiled, “Just go. He's probably waiting for you anyway.”

Ignoring the way her cheeks heated up at Carol's words, Beth dropped her bag on the table before hurrying out of the garden. She half-ran down toward the broken wall and smiled when she saw Daryl leaning against it, smoking a cigarette. He looked up then and Beth couldn't help but just grin wider because it was clear that Carol had been right about him expecting her to show up. What that meant, she didn't want to think about at the moment, so instead, she just ran and closed the distance between them before stopping just a few feet away from him.

He flicked the cigarette to the ground and pressed the heel of his boot against it before looking up at her, releasing the last bit of smoke he had held in.

“Ya better be careful out there, Greene,” he told her, getting straight to the point. Beth suppressed the shiver that threatened to run through her body at his hoarse voice and took a step forward.

“You too,” she said, reaching toward his arm. She rested her hand there for a moment, looking at him. While she wanted to ask him what him waiting for her like this– him _knowing_ that she would come look for him– meant, she didn't want to risk making things between them awkward. They both knew that they needed this; to be apart for at least a little while so they could get themselves straight.

“I don't wanna say goodbye,” Beth told him then, squeezing his arm lightly. Her eyes flickered down, settling on his lips before moving up again, connecting with his. “I know I'll be back and then I want you to tell me how your hunt went.”

There was something in his eyes; something fleeting that was only there for a millisecond before it disappeared and he snorted, trying to cover up whatever it was. “Ain't gonna be much to tell,” he said. “I'll prob'ly be back tomorrow though, so ya best be here when I do,” he added. “Watch your back an' don't wander off alone, 'kay?”

“You're starting to sound a lot like Maggie,” Beth said, pulling her hand away from him, but he grabbed it quickly, holding on.

“She's just worried 'bout ya,” he said. “I'm just tellin' ya to keep your eyes open. I know you can take care of yourself... Seen it first hand.”

While he could be talking about  her saving him in the woods that one time, or how she had fought those men on their last run and then the walkers during the herd attack, but she had a feeling that there was once again more to his words.

I t was something she had gotten used to by now; Daryl's words that sounded like they had a double meaning to them. Somehow they always left her feeling like she should be able to understand what he was trying to tell her, or what he was hinting at, but at the same time, he was sometimes so cryptic that she didn't even feel like getting into it.

“I'll be careful as long as you are too,” Beth finally said, ignoring the way her skin ignited when his thumb brushed over her wrist. 

He confirmed that he would be with a small nod, “I'll see ya when ya get back.”

Beth felt the urge to lean into him and just breathe him in for a second, but she didn't. Her head and her thoughts were messed up as they were after everything that had happened these last couple of days, with Noah and her argument with Abraham and just the bubbly feelings she got around Daryl in general. This trip would do her good; she just knew it.

She smiled at him when he finally released her wrist, looking like he had surprised even himself by holding on for too long. He offered her a small tug of his lips, looking a bit unsure still, before reaching around to hold his crossbow, loading it with a bolt before looking at her again. She could tell that he wanted to tell her to be careful again, but he wouldn't because he didn't want to nag her. He let out a small breath and turned toward the woods, “Better get goin'. Don't want them waitin' on ya for too long.” Daryl had spoken without looking at her, but she nodded anyway. It wasn't her only reply to him though, because she reached toward him and rested her hand at his elbow, forcing him to turn around and look at her. Then, she just looked at him intently until he finally lifted his head and gazed into her eyes.

Silently, she tried to tell him everything she was too afraid to speak of yet. She told him that she wanted him to be safe and that she didn't want to lose him too. Losing Noah had been hard and still was, but she knew for a fact that if something were to happen to Daryl, she would feel a thousand times worse and her admitting that to herself scared her a lot.  Noah had been her friend and it didn't feel fair to him that she was somehow comparing how she had felt when she had lost him to how she would feel if Daryl died too. There was just something different though, because even though she did consider Daryl a friend, something else was always there inside of her, tugging at her heart, making it go wild in her chest when she saw him.

She didn't know what it was yet and she didn't know whether she was ready to know yet either. But at times like this, when Daryl looked at her as if she was someone special to him too, she got curious and felt like just bluntly asking him about it.

Instead of giving in though, she let her hand fall back down to her side and allowed Daryl to just give her another one of his half-nods before he turned away from her and started walking toward the forest. She watched him go, wrapping her arms around herself trying to stop that fluttering inside of her. When Daryl reached the edge of the woods, he turned his head in her direction and she couldn't help but raise her hand in a small wave. She could have sworn that she saw him smile then, but it was gone before she could really focus in on it and he simply raised his hand back at her before walking away and out of view.

Beth stood there for another moment before sighing, turning around and walking back to the farmhouse where the rest of the group that would be going on the run today were waiting.

* * *

Daryl walker through the woods, quiet as he always was when he was on a hunt. He had thought that maybe he would be able to relax today, away from everyone and all the bottled up emotions he had been having since the walker attack but it seemed like every cell in his body was yelling at him to just turn back and join Beth and the others on that run.

He paused briefly, crouching to look at some tracks a little closer, knowing that he couldn't go back. Beth needed the space and quite frankly, she had been right when she had told him that he needed it too. They had been growing closer ever since she had first approached him that time in the woods. Just like that time when the two of them had been on their own, the only thing Beth had needed to do was chip away a small piece of the wall he had built up around himself and stand back to watch all his defenses fall slowly. It had shocked him, even back then, that someone like Beth Greene could get into his head like that.

' _She's gotten into a lot more_ _than ya head lil' brother_. '

Daryl always tried his best to ignore Merle's voice whenever it broke through and acted as his conscience. It was kind of a funny thing, that Merle was there to help him tell right from wrong, when Merle had always been the one making the decisions for him and always somehow ended up making the wrong choices.

Until the end, that is.

The image of his brother as a biter came back to Daryl and his chest tightened painfully at the memory. In that moment, when he had continuously taken out his rage at his own failures, at the Governor and at Merle himself, while stabbing him in the head, over and over, Daryl had never felt more alone. He remembered going back to the prison afterward, telling Rick what had happened before going to his cell and isolating himself for the rest of the day.

He had never told anyone about it, because he hadn't wanted to admit to himself back then. It had been almost like a guilty pleasure he had, hearing Beth Greene sing.

It had been late and Judith had been fussing and the little Asskicker slept in the same cell as Beth who had by then officially become her caregiver. Daryl had been visiting his deepest, darkest memories that he had pushed away for so many years, when he had heard Judith cry out. Everyone else had still been asleep, having gotten used to the sounds of the baby, but Daryl hardly ever slept anyway, so he had sat up in his bed and listened to whether or not Beth would be able to calm the baby.

Then, the young blonde had begun humming before her melodious voice started softly singing.

_ 'Somewhere over the rainbow...' _

Daryl remembered how he had frowned at Beth's choice of song,  thinking about how damn long it had been since he had even seen a rainbow since the  W orld had gotten fucked up. Beth had continued singing, quietly enough so that she wouldn't wake anyone else and Daryl had surprised even himself when he had moved toward the door of his cell. He hadn't gone to the steps, or to the railing, because he hadn't wanted her to see him. The only thing he had wanted, he realized now, was to hear Beth's voice more clearly. He had sat with his back against the wall, one of his knees up while his other leg stretched out on the floor. The pad of his thumb had caught between his teeth as he had nervously nibbled on it, listening as the baby's cries died out slowly, only leaving Beth's soft humming behind. It had continued for a little while longer until she had stopped and gone back into her cell, never knowing that he had been listening to her.

Daryl wasn't sure if anyone knew about that, and the memory of how Beth even back then had managed to make him feel a bit better after Merle's death without even knowing it, made him smile a little.

But those good times were gone because now Beth never sung and she certainly didn't hum or hold Judith. Although, the fact that she had gone out of her way to get Judith and Carl to safety when the walkers had attacked and the fact that she had stood up to Abraham the way she had, telling the man that it was for Judith that they needed to stay on the farm... Well, it showed that there was still a piece of the old her in there; the part that always took care of the younger ones.

Daryl's mind wandered to when they had separated earlier. Beth hadn't wanted to say goodbye to him and he couldn't help but wonder if it was her mind bringing forward another memory. Sometimes when she spoke, it sounded almost as if she remembered everything from before, and Daryl always had to force himself to wait another second or two, to see whether she would react or actually tell him that she remembered something. Two days ago when she had so casually brought up that she remembered something her father used to say, Daryl hadn't been able to hide how happy it had made him. It was as if she was getting back the smaller things from back then and he wanted her to remember all on her own.

At times though, he questioned if Beth really needed to remember everything. A month ago, he had been certain that he didn't want her to remember a single thing about back then, all because it would make her life now easier if she didn't have all the heartache to deal with. Now, he felt like he wanted her to remember  _some_ things, at least. He wanted her to have her good memories back; the ones before him and before the  W orld went to shit. She deserved to remember her family from a time when they had been happy she deserved so, so much more.

She deserved to  _be_ happy.

Daryl stood again, staring ahead at the obvious tracks of a deer. There were some walker tracks there as well, but they were a couple of days old which meant that they were probably from the herd that had attacked them. He had to focus now; he couldn't keep thinking about Beth or the way things had been before. When he thought about that, the positive things quickly faded in the darkness of the negative. He thought back to how she was and how calm she had been when he had gone to her and told her about Zach dying on his watch, how she had embraced him after asking him if he was okay, telling him that she no longer cried.

She was a fucking liar though because he had never seen her cry as much as she did after the prison fell.

His chest constricted once again and he swallowed thickly as his mind began making a list of all the things that Beth Greene had suffered though and survived. She had been through so much already and she didn't need him making things worse by doing something stupid like falling in–

_ No _ .

He wasn't even going to go there.

As he continued to track the deer he was hoping to bring back to the farm, Daryl forced himself to think about anything other than Beth Greene, and the way she made him feel.

* * *

Beth jumped out of the car, grabbing her water bottle from her bag, taking a big gulp. Next to her, Tara was stretching her arms up in the air, turning her torso from side to side, clearly happy that they had gotten to take a break after driving for hour hours straight.

“No one walk away without tellin' me first,” Rick instructed. “We don't need to get separated just because someone decided to wander off. Abe, Sasha, Ty, let's look at the maps again to plan emergency routes.”

Beth wanted to tell him that they wouldn't need them because the roads that they were taking now hadn't had any walkers sighted on them for months already, but she didn't speak.

“Well aren't you glum today,” Tara piped up, nudging her in the side with her elbow. Beth tried to offer her a small smile, but she honestly didn't feel like it. Ever since they had driven away from the farm, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about Daryl and it was embarrassing that she had gotten so attached to him in such a short amount of time.

“Whoa,” Tara whistled lowly, “you really _are_ acting weird. Give us a smile, Greene.” Beth finally managed to force herself to give Tara a smile and the other woman grinned back at her.

“Cut her some slack, Tara,” Rosita said as she approached them, leaning against the car with her own bottle of water in her hand. “It's just been four days since the attack. If Beth doesn't feel like smiling, she doesn't have to.”

“It's not that,” Beth admitted, lowering her eyes when both Tara and Rosita looked at her curiously. “I mean, of course I'm sad and upset about Noah, but... We have to keep going, don't we? I think we owe him that much and I don't think he would have liked us forgetting that we're still here...”

She looked at the other two women who finally nodded. “You're right,” Rosita agreed. “Noah would have wanted us to move forward.”

“Yeah,” Tara drawled, but a sad expression still covered her face. Silence fell upon them for a little while, until Tara looked up at Beth again. “But if you aren't down because of what happened to Noah, why haven't you said anything for four hours and done nothing other than look out the window in a completely dazed state?”

Beth stared at her for a moment. “I didn't know you were observing me and taking notes, Tara,” she said, her eyebrow raising.

“She's probably just as bored as the rest of us are,” Rosita shrugged, smirking at Tara before turning to Beth. “But I have to agree, you've been very quiet today.”

“I guess I'm just thinking,” Beth said with a simple shrug.

“About...?” Tara pressed, looking at her questioningly.

“Daryl.”

Beth felt her cheeks heat up at her honest admission, realizing that that was probably something she should have kept to herself, at least until she knew for sure  _why_ her mind never let her thoughts stray for too long before returning to the hunter.

“What I mean is,” Beth cleared her throat, “that it feels weird to be separated from him. As in, I've been spending so much time with him lately that it feels a little wrong to be here without him.” She was rambling and she knew it, and she continued to regret that she had ever wanted to go on this run without Daryl.

Beth noticed how Tara and Rosita were both looking at her with grins plastered on their faces and she once again cleared her throat, turning away so that they wouldn't see her face that was most likely flushed by now. Her eyes drifted to Michonne, who was standing not too far from Rick and by the knowing look the slightly older woman sent her, Beth wondered whether she had somehow heard Beth's fumbled confession.

Suddenly, Beth saw a chance; a chance of asking someone who might actually tell her the truth or at least give her something to go on regarding her old relationship with Daryl. She looked back at Tara and Rosita, who were still looking as amused as ever. “Is it weird that I feel that way?” Beth asked. “That I actually miss having him around?”

“No, I don't think so,” Tara shrugged. “It would kind of make sense that you feel something like that for him...” Tara trailed off, suddenly looking very uncertain again.

“What do you mean by that?” Beth frowned, seeing on Tara's face that she had never intended to say so much.

“I don't know if I'm the right person to talk to about you and Daryl, since I never actually saw the two of you interacting,” Tara confessed. “I mean, I didn't know Daryl very well back then– still can't claim that I know him much now either– but you I never even had the chance to talk to, you know?”

Beth knew and she nodded, understanding where Tara was coming from. The woman clearly hadn't known Beth back then, before she was shot, and Beth knew first hand how difficult Daryl could be when it came to communicating.

“Considering how hard Daryl took your death though, I'm sure the two of you must have known each other very well before,” Rosita interjected, making Beth look at her instead.

“What?” Beth asked, not really sure she had heard Rosita correctly. Daryl had taken her death hard? Why would he have done that if the two of them _hadn't_ been close, like he was always saying? Now Rosita was insinuating that she had suspected that she and Daryl had at least known each other well before Beth's supposed demise, pretty much confirming Beth's own suspicions.

“Yeah,” Rosita said, looking at her curiously. “He took your death really hard... Didn't anyone tell you that?” the woman frowned.

“No,” Beth swallowed, looking down, kicking a stone. “No one told me that.”

She didn't have to look at Rosita's face to know that the woman had just realized that she had made a mistake by giving Beth that little piece of information. Even though Beth wanted to be mad at people for withholding such a thing from her, she was in too deep thoughts, trying to decipher the meaning of the surprising fact that had presented to her.

Had Daryl been upset because she had been a part of his family– or more specifically the family that he had gotten after the apocalypse had started– or had there been something more between them that no one else knew about? Or did they know about it?

Beth thought back to the way Maggie had spoken to her about Daryl once and the way that everyone always seemed so understanding whenever she and Daryl turned to each other, almost as if it was the most normal thing in the World. She couldn't help but wonder and her mind was treading into dangerous territories, to where she and Daryl might have had more with each other, that no one else had known about. 

Had they maybe...been together?

Beth bit her lip at the thought, trying to clear her mind and ignore the way her heart jumped inside her chest at the thought of her and Daryl being romantically involved without anyone else knowing. She wanted to snort at herself and her ridiculous thoughts, but before she could do so herself, Daryl's voice filled her mind.

_ 'It's like a damn romance novel.' _

Beth blinked a couple of times as the same sentence flashed inside of her mind again. She saw brief images of Daryl passing by her side and she remembered seeing him from her peripheral view as he turned his head toward her, the six words flowing effortlessly from his lips as he swaggered past her.

_ 'It's like a damn romance novel.' _

“Alright everyone, let's get back on the road,” Abraham spoke up, tearing her away from her memory. “We need to get goin' if we're gonna make it there soon. No more than two hours left!”

Beth pushed it back down; everything that she was suddenly feeling and all the unanswered questions that were floating around in her mind. She needed to stay focused and she didn't need the distraction. Soon, they would be at the warehouse and even though it had been cleared of walkers months ago, no one knew what they might run into.

So she closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths of air, trying to calm herself and clear her head. It wasn't very easily done though, since the pine trees in the forest surrounding them, reminded her so much of Daryl.

* * *

The hissing and growling was what caused Daryl to stop in his tracks. He listened carefully, but the walkers that were making the sounds didn't sound like they were approaching him, but they still sounded close. Twisting around, he raised his crossbow, preparing himself for a possible attack as he moved between the trees. He stopped again though, when he spotted two roamers on the ground, legs obviously crushed, intestines visible on the ground next to them as they tried to crawl toward him, snapping their jaws like rabid dogs. Looking around on the ground, he noticed a lot of old footprints, all seeming to be from people who had been staggering and stumbling. It didn't take long to figure out that the herd that had gotten to the farmhouse had probably walked through this area in the woods and that the two roamers that were on the ground had most likely tripped over something and then been crushed by the others as they advanced.

Sighing deeply, Daryl took out his knife, walking toward the living corpses and stabbed them in their heads, effectively killing them. The woods around him was once again filled with silence and he looked at the two bodies, wondering whether he should do something about them. It wasn't as if he could carry them with him to the pits and burn them there like the rest of the herd that had attacked, so he had to leave them behind, trusting that mother nature would break them down eventually. He started to stand up, when something caught his attention. Kneeling on the ground, he lifted the arm of one of the walkers, seeing a curious looking wound around it's wrist. Frowning, he touched the red line where the flesh had been pressed in and cut too, it seemed.

He looked at the other wrist and noticed the same thing there before looking at the other corpse, seeing that it too had the same markings.

“The fuck...” he mumbled to himself, furrowing his eyebrows as he tried to make sense of what he was seeing. 

Why the hell would anyone tie up walkers?

The markings on their wrists looked like they had come from either ropes or zip-ties. The dead ones had obviously been struggling against their bonds to get free before someone had cut them loose, if the small cut on one of the walker's wrist was any indication.

Daryl stood up again and turned his eyes in the direction where the walkers had come from. Something strange was going on and he knew that he should probably go back to hunting that deer, but he needed to figure out what had happened. It didn't make any sense for a herd like that to just randomly show up after weeks of barely seeing any walkers at all in the area. Finding those two walkers like that, with clear evidence that they had been tied up or something, only made him wonder even more what was going on.

He didn't need to think much about it and he certainly didn't stop to calculate the risks he was taking by following the trail. Instead, he simply began walking, following the footprints of the heard backwards, trying to figure out where they had come from.

It didn't take him long to find something else, which only served to raise a hundred more questions. He had walked for only fifteen minutes when he had come across a small clearing where the prints ended. His eyes moved over the dry ground, eyes narrowing when he saw the distinct tracks of a truck. He crouched down again and touched the soil, noticing that it had dried up as well, much like the signs of the walkers that had attacked them.

There had been someone there, just a few days ago, probably around the same time as the walkers had found the farm. Someone had driven a truck up this small road that Daryl hadn't even known about, since he hadn't walked in this direction yet when he had been out on his hunts. Something was clearly going on and as Daryl stood up, he wondered whether or not the walker attack had really been as random as they had first thought, or if there was something else in play too.

* * *

Beth opened her jacket and fanned herself a bit with her hand. They had been carrying planks and tools to the truck for what felt like hours already and her arms were beginning to get a little tired from all the hard work.

“We're gonna need more nails,” Michonne pointed out, checking the list they had brought with them. “But those are on the other side of the warehouse.”

“I can get them,” Beth offered quickly, raising her hand a bit. She wanted to be as far away from those damn planks as possible right now.

“Take someone with you as backup,” Rick told her.

“The warehouse has already been cleared,” Beth pointed out. “We've been here for hours. Don't you think we would have come across a walker if there was one in there?”

Rick looked at her for a moment, “Better be safe than sorry.”

He was right and Beth knew it, so she didn't protest.

“I'll go with you,” Tara offered, carrying a bag of something to the car. She dropped it loudly and Beth cringed a little at the sound of metal clinking together, but nodded nonetheless.

“I'm comin' too,” Rick said, fingers trailing over his machete as if to make sure that it was still where it was supposed to be.

“Let's go then,” Beth said, offering the two of them a small smile. They headed inside, but not before Rick gently rested his hand on Michonne's shoulder, mumbling something to her about keeping her eyes open. The little gesture made Beth smile a bit as she once again wondered whether there was something going on between the katana-carrying woman and the group's leader.

The three of them walked into the store and started for the back. Beth had one of her knives out just in case and they moved fairly quickly through the store. There was something incredibly eerie about the place; something that hadn't been there when Beth and Morgan had been there a couple of months ago, checking out if there was anything useful to bring back to the farm. Beth frowned a bit to herself when she walked past one lane, noticing broken glass on the floor; glass that hadn't been there before either.

She brushed it off as pure paranoia, telling herself that she was just making things up in her head because Daryl had told her to be careful and keep her eyes open.

“There they are,” Rick said, pointing at a shelf. “We'll grab some of 'em and put 'em in these bags and take 'em to the car.”

“How about I pack them and the two of you carry them out?” Tara suggested. “My arms feel like they're going to fall off and it'll go faster like this.”

Rick nodded, “You pack, I'll carry and send someone else in, while Beth keeps watch.”

“Okay,” Beth agreed, glad that she wouldn't have to carry anything too because she felt a lot like Tara; arms aching.

They started working and when Rick walked off, carrying two full bags of nails, Tara turned to Beth. “You know, I bet there's a whole layer of these nails somewhere in the back,” she stated. “Maybe we could find it and take them all with us, use them to build another shed?”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Beth said. “I can go and check if there's an office somewhere. There might be a building plan or something there to show where everything is...”

“Just be careful,” Tara called after her.

“Aren't I always?” Beth asked over her shoulder before heading off. She walked down a few aisles, knowing that she had seen a sign somewhere that was supposed to direct people to the main office. It didn't take long for her to find it but she noticed that the door was locked, but the keys were in the door.

She was stupid.

She made a horrible, _stupid_ mistake, because she didn't listen first, like Morgan had always told her to do. She didn't think that someone might have left the keys there on purpose, or that she should have knocked on the small window to see whether something would make a noise inside.

She was tired and distracted and she had figured that looters or something must have been there once, and she just opened the door without thinking.

Fifteen walkers turned toward her the moment she opened the door and she stumbled back when one of them immediately attacked.

“ _Ah_!” she shrieked, not being able to help herself as she lifted her knife on reflex and stabbed the rotting corpse in the head, turning as quickly as she could to run away. One of them grabbed at her shoulder and she twisted, slashing her knife across it's face as it snarled at her and she stumbled a bit before pushing it away as she began to run. “Rick! Tara!” she yelled, hoping that they would hear her and come help. “Walkers!”

She zigzagged through the aisles as the brainless monsters followed her, never feeling too far away. Not wanting to lead them straight to Tara, she hoped that she could get them to the other side of the store instead, but when she rounded one of the corners, she let out another yell as she slammed right into another walker and fell to the floor. She felt the broken glass digging into her palms as she slammed knife into the walker's temple, shoving the dead body off of her before scrambling back, reaching for her extra gun. She began shooting the walkers, knowing that the gunshots would alert the others that she was in danger, hoping that someone would come.

Walker after walker fell, but she ran out of bullets too soon and she still hadn't gotten up from the floor.

“Blondie!” a voice suddenly boomed as another gun started firing. Beth let out a breath as she stared wide-eyed at the walkers that were being killed in front of her. She turned and saw Abraham standing on the other side of the aisle. Soon enough, the walkers were all dead and Beth panted as Abraham sprinted toward her.

“Ya weren't bit, were ya?” Abraham asked, looking her over from where he stood above her.

“No,” Beth shook her head, swallowing thickly, the reality of her own stupidity sinking in. There was a bitter taste in her mouth at the mere thought of how badly the entire thing could have ended. “I'm okay,” she said as Abraham offered her his hand. She took it and he pulled her up to stand. Her heart was still beating wildly in her chest, but she could feel herself calming at least a little. “Thank you, Abraham.”

“It's nothin',” Abraham said, looking her over again. “Heard ya when I walked in to get ya. Tara told me she sent ya this way.”

Beth looked at the blood that was still oozing from the dead walkers on the floor. “We didn't know... I messed up,” she mumbled.

“You're bleeding,” Abraham stated then, sounding concerned. Beth lifted her hands and looked at the small cuts on them, taking out a small piece of glass that was still etched into her skin.

“I'm okay,” she said quietly, watching as a small drop of blood appeared.

“No, you're _bleeding_ ,” Abraham said, suddenly sounding more urgent, pointing toward her shirt.

Beth glanced down and saw that there was indeed a darkened spot on her shirt. She pushed her jacked away a little and as soon as her eyes settled on the glass shard that was lodged into her side, the pain started spreading through her and nausea bubbled up inside of her.

Her knees trembled and she winced at the pain, but before she could even start crumbling, she felt Abraham sweep her up as she dropped her emptied gun to the floor.

“Damn it,” Abraham muttered, holding her to him as he started to run toward the exit. “Hold on. I gotta wrap that up before ya bleed to death.”

Beth felt hazy, “Can't we just take it out?” The pain became sharper as Abraham ran with her, but she tried not to show it as she wrapped her arms around his neck, doing the best she could to just hang on.

“Ya wanna bleed out faster? Ya really are stupid, Blondie,” Abraham chuckled, but Beth could hear the worry in his tone.

She felt a little bad then and she was pretty sure that she was getting delirious. “I'm sorry for punching you,” she mumbled. “You just really pissed me off.”

She felt Abraham's chuckle before she heard it, but black spots began blurring her vision just as Abraham got them out of the warehouse. She heard Rick yelling, asking what had happened and then Abraham saying that they didn't have time, because they needed to stop her bleeding and then get her back to the farm as soon as possible.

“Dixon is gonna kill me if ya die,” Abraham said in her ear as she felt him lay her down on the ground. Someone put something soft behind her head and she started to feel droopy. “You're gonna be fine, Beth. Ya hear me? I'm just gonna tie my shirt around the wound so the bleeding stops and then we're gonna take ya back to the farm and you're gonna be...”

Abraham's words faded away as her eyes closed. The pain felt number, and the World around her seemed to just slip away. She wanted to tell them that she was sorry for messing everything up, but her lips would no longer move to form words.

The last thing she thought about, was how Daryl would react, if she never came back.

* * *

I t had been getting late and Maggie was sure that Beth, Glenn and the others who had gone on the run wouldn't be coming back tonight.  She was standing in the kitchen, looking out the window, thinking about the last thing she had said to Beth before furiously walking away from her this morning, and she felt a little bad about it. She was tired of fighting and she just wanted her sister back. Beth hadn't spoken to her properly for weeks and all she wished for, was for her mistakes to be forgiven and put in the past. She knew that she had been a coward for not wanting to believe that Beth was alive after the prison fell. Even after Daryl had told her that Beth had just been taken, Maggie had assumed that it was too good to be true that Beth was still out there somewhere. She hadn't wanted to think about bad people kidnapping her, hurting her and doing the most unimaginable things to her... So she just hadn't thought about it.

Now, she hated herself for just letting go of her sister like that.

She remembered the way she had fallen to her knees, crying and sobbing when she had seen Daryl carry Beth's dead body out of the hospital. The hatred she had felt for herself and for her choices stabbed her deep in her chest and she wished she could have changed things and maybe looked for Beth sooner instead of going off on a mission that had ended up being for nothing.

She could see the lights of a car approaching and it took a moment for her to shake herself out of her thoughts before she ran toward the door.

“Morgan, they're back!” she called out happily. She opened the door and stepped out on the porch, frowning only when she saw the speed that the car was heading for the house in. It stopped abruptly and Glenn jumped out, already hurrying over to her as Abraham stepped out of the backseat. Her eyes settled on the blood on Glenn's shirt and she opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, but he had already reached her.

“You have to go to our room and stay there, Mags,” he told her, worry shining through in his eyes.

“What happened? What's going on?” Maggie frowned, trying to look past him, but he pushed her toward the door and tried to block her sight with his body.

It was to no use, because Maggie saw when Abraham reached into the car and pulled out a limb Beth, who looked as pale as a sheet and had a blood soaked shirt tied around her stomach. The air was knocked out of Maggie's chest as Abraham pushed past them, barking orders at Carol and Carl who had come to see what was going on, telling them to get Morgan as he hurried with Beth toward his bedroom, which was the closest one.

Maggie stared, her breaths coming out in short pants as panic began welling inside of her again.

“What happened?” she cried out, feeling tears spring to her eyes as she ran after Abraham. She walked into his room in time to see him setting Beth down on one of the beds, Eugene there assisting him to try to make her comfortable.

“Get her the hell out of here!” Abraham yelled at Glenn, who grabbed Maggie's arms and pulled her out of the room.

“No, Glenn! Let go of me!” Maggie struggled. “Beth!”

“Maggie, ya need to calm down,” Rick said behind her. “She's lost a lot of blood and we might need to give her a transfusion–”

“ What  _ happened _ , Rick?” Maggie demanded, her hands clenching into fists and her lower lip trembling as she tried to collect herself.

“ We thought the warehouse was cleared,” Rick explained. “She walked off to check for something in the office and someone had apparently locked walkers in there. Abraham found her in time, but she was layin' on the floor. She must've tripped and there was glass everywhere and a piece got lodged into her side...”

“Oh, God...” Maggie breathed, grabbing her head. “How could this happen...? The last time we spoke, we were fighting... She can't die, Rick...”

“She's not gonna die, Maggie,” Rick told her sternly. “We got here as fast as we could, but she fainted due to the shock or something. We can fix her up and we're not gonna let her die on us now. Not after everything.”

Maggie nodded, but the tears were still slipping from her eyes. She turned when she saw Morgan rushing into the room, closing the door behind him. Glenn touched her shoulder and she turned, burying her face into the crook of his neck as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Ya need to be prepared to give blood, if ya have the same blood type as her,” Rick told her.

“I do,” Maggie nodded. “I'll do anything I can.”

“Ya need to gather yourself,” Rick told her sternly. “I'm not sure how much training Abraham's had with dealing with stab wounds like this, but he seems to know what he's doin'. Morgan and Eugene can probably assist him too, but ya need to be prepared to step in if you're needed. Your dad taught ya some things that can be useful in there.”

Maggie nodded, but her throat was too clogged up to speak.

“Come on, Mags,” Glenn mumbled into her ear. “Let's go sit down for a while. The others should be here soon.”

Maggie numbly followed Glenn to the living room, glancing back at the closed door one last time.

An hour later, Morgan sent out Eugene to get Maggie because they had finished getting the glass shard out and stitching Beth up. It seemed like the shard hadn't been too deeply imbedded, so Morgan hoped that it wouldn't cause Beth any major problems. She would be sore though, but the wound had been cleaned and the bleeding had stopped thanks to Abraham and his quick thinking. Maggie still had to give blood though, and fortunately, they had the supplies they needed since they had brought back a bunch of medical things from a run they had been on a couple of weeks ago.

“She woke up while we were stitching her up,” Morgan told Maggie. He was brushing Beth's sweat soaked forehead with a cold rag. “Mumbled incoherently for a while before she passed out again...”

“She's gonna be okay,” Maggie said, putting her hand on the older man's shoulder. “She's survived a hell of a lot more without medical attention. She can pull through this too.”

Morgan nodded absentmindedly, but Maggie could tell that he was still tense and worried about her sister.

It had taken some time for Maggie to understand just how deeply bonded Beth and Morgan were. They had been alone for seven months, surviving together and depending on each other without anyone else... They had been through so much together and from it all, a father-daughter bond had developed that Maggie was certain mirrored the relationship Beth had had with their real father while he had still been alive. She was happy that Beth had found that in Morgan, not because she thought it was good that Beth had forgotten about their real father, but because she understood that Beth had needed it both while she was recovering as well as now that she was better.

“You should get some sleep,” Maggie told Morgan, her hand still resting on his shoulder. “I know this must be difficult for you, but you need rest. She's going to be okay. I'll stay with her and I'll get you if anything changes.”

She half-expected Morgan to argue, but was surprised to see him nodding silently. “I'll be on the couch,” he told her. “Eugene, Rosita and Abraham are gonna be sleeping there until we can move her.” Maggie nodded and Morgan stood up, looking at her with those wise eyes of his that she was sure had once been crazed, if Michonne's story about the man was true. “She's going to come around,” he said then. “This is going to open her eyes and she's going to forgive you for what happened back then.”

“How do you know?” Maggie asked hoarsely.

Morgan offered her a weak, tired smile. “Because I know the lil' Lady,” he replied. “She's been coming around for a while... It's just a matter of time.”

Maggie didn't know what to say so she remained silent as the older man walked out of the room. She sat down on the chair that he had been sitting on and took over dabbing Beth's forehead with the rag, brushing away her golden locks from her face. Sadness welled inside of her when she once again thought about how close she had gotten to losing her. She and Carol had worked together to clean away as much blood as possible from Beth's skin when Morgan and Abraham had finished stitching her up, but Maggie knew that Beth would need to take a proper shower once she was able to. Tara and Rosita had arrived a bit later with Tyreese and Sasha, who all came to check on Beth and Maggie had been surprised to also see Abraham hanging around after he had helped Morgan the best he could. She had told him how thankful she was that he had been there and that he had helped Beth when she had needed it. The man's face had turned slightly red and he had looked away, mumbling something about not leaving any men or women behind.

“D- _Daryl_...”

Maggie looked up startled, after what felt like hours and hours. “Beth?” she asked, leaning a little closer as Beth's eyes began fluttering open.

“Daryl?” Beth asked again, her voice still a low whisper, but it was clearer too.

“It's me, Maggie,” Maggie said.

“Is... Is Daryl back yet?” Beth asked, closing her eyes, wincing a little as she tried to move.

“No,” Maggie said, pressing the rag against her hot skin. She had a slight fever, but it would hopefully break by the morning. “It's still late and he said he'd be back tomorrow mornin',” Maggie said softly, tears stinging again as she smiled a little. “You're okay, Beth. You're goin' to be okay.”

Beth's eyes fluttered open a little again and her blue eyes settled on Maggie's face. Maggie didn't fail to notice how Beth's face had fallen a little when she had told her that Daryl wasn't back yet and in that moment, she missed her more than ever. She missed talking to her about everything and nothing and she knew that it was her own fault for keeping such a trivial thing from her younger sister.

“I'm sorry,” Beth mumbled, wincing a little again, closing her eyes. Her voice sounded a bit hoarse too.

“For what?” Maggie frowned.

“Bein' stupid,” Beth answered. “Almost getting' myself killed before I could tell you that I forgive you... That I want to move on... That I want my sister back.”

“Beth,” Maggie said, a tear falling down her cheek. She wiped it away as quickly as she could before catching Beth's hand in hers. “You have nothin' to be sorry about. I should be the one to apologize for everything I've done and the things I kept from you...”

“Let's just-” Beth inhaled sharply, clearly in pain, “-forget and forgive. After Noah... Life's too short... I need to know that I still have my sister...”

“You still have me,” Maggie nodded. “You'll always have me from now on. Whenever you need me, I'll be there,” she promised.

A small smile appeared on Beth's face before her breathing evened out a bit as she fell asleep again. Maggie kept holding her hand until Glenn came to switch with her, but she laid down in one of the other beds, not leaving the room.

They were going to be good.

* * *

Daryl walked back toward the farmhouse, the small deer around his shoulders and rabbits strapped to his belt that he always carried with him when he went hunting. He was tired and he had been hunting since yesterday morning, and all he wanted now was to hand the game over to someone else so they could clean it while he took a shower and went to bed.

Or maybe he could just skip the shower and head to bed immediately? It wouldn't be the first time he did it, since he was usually so exhausted whenever he came back from a trip like this.

It wasn't just that it was physically draining, but this time around his thoughts had been plagued by the suspicion that had risen inside of him when he had found those truck tracks. He had moved on and hunted down the deer, but it had constantly been in the back of his mind. That, along with Beth.

He hadn't been able to stop thinking about the blonde and he hoped that they had actually gotten home already so that he could check on her too and make sure that everything had gone okay on the run.

As he got closer to the house, he saw that the cars were indeed parked in front of it, but something seemed off. They were too close to the house and turned in a strange angle, as if they had been rushed there. He picked up his pace a little, walking as fast as he could without dropping the deer he carried. His heart hammered in his chest when he saw Carol standing with her arms crossed on the porch, a concerned look on her face. Somethin  _was_ wrong; something  _had_ happened.

_ Beth _ , his mind screamed at him and as soon as he got into the garden, he dropped the deer on the table and walked to Carol.

“We need to talk before you go in there,” Carol said.

“What happened?” he asked, already trying to move past her, but she stopped him with a hand against his chest.

“It's Beth,” Carol told him. “She's fine now. Got hurt on the run and they brought her back. Morgan stitched her up and Maggie gave her blood–”

“Maggie gave her blood?” Daryl repeated, his voice a little raised as his panic started flaring up again.

“I told you she's better,” Carol said, still as calm as ever. “We moved her upstairs to her room just a bit earlier. She should be awake now and– _Daryl!_ ” Carol called after him as he rushed past her. He saw that the others were in the living room, but he didn't even look at them as he took two steps at a time, hurrying upstairs. He ran down the hallway to Beth's room, ignoring Maggie who told him to wait from where she stood by her own bedroom door, and he opened the door and stepped inside of Beth's bedroom without thinking.

He stopped in his tracks and Morgan paused what he was doing, looking up at him. Daryl's mouth fell open a bit as he realized that Beth was laying on her side, her bare back and left side exposed as Morgan seemed to be changing her bandages. She looked a bit paler than usual, but she seemed to be alert enough to know that she should be blushing. A light pink shade appeared on her cheeks as she stared at him, blue eyes blinking with some kind of mix of both happiness and surprise.

“Daryl,” she breathed out, clutching the towel she was using to cover her _clearly_ bare chest a little tighter. “You're back.”

Her voice snapped him out of his daze and he quickly shut his eyes tightly, turning his back to them, trying hard to make himself that he hadn't seen a hint of the curve of her breast from the side.

' _And ya used to call me a fuckin' perv..._ ' Merle seemed to snort in his mind, and the tone he was using only caused Daryl to screw his eyes shut even tighter as well as covering them with a hand, to make sure that Beth and Morgan knew that he hadn't intended on sneaking a peak at Beth.

“'M sorry,” Daryl mumbled, feeling his face heat up as he started for the door.

“No!” Beth called out, making him stop, but he didn't dare turn around and look at her. “We'll be done here soon... Morgan is just cleaning the wound a little and changing my bandages.”

He didn't say anything, but he didn't move toward the door either. Instead he stayed rooted where he was, not turning around until Morgan called in Maggie to help Beth put on her shirt before leaving the room together with the other woman once she too was done helping Beth.

“It's safe to turn around now,” Beth told him, a hint of a teasing tone in her voice.

Daryl knew he was blushing, but he still turned around and looked at her. She was wearing a zip-up hoodie since it was probably more practical for her and his eyes automatically moved to the place where he had seen Morgan cleaning the wound.

“Come close,” Beth said, motioning for him to come forth. He didn't hesitate for a second as he crossed the room and stood by her bed. She patted the small amount of space by her side and he sat down, abiding to her wishes. There was a weak smile covering Beth's face and as soon as he had settled on her bed, she had pushed herself up a little and wrapped her arms around him, burying her nose in his neck.

He was sure he smelled like shit and then he almost frowned at himself for thinking that Beth would even care about that right now. Besides, she smelled a little like dried blood and disinfectant and she couldn't exactly say anything since he had been out hunting.

“I'm glad you're here,” Beth mumbled against his neck and he felt heat rise from the place where her lips brushed against his skin.

“Are ya high or somethin'?” he heard himself asking, his hand moving to the back of her head as he held her close, returning the hug. His questioned only seemed to amuse Beth as she giggled a little before pulling back, wincing as she did.

“The painkillers aren't _that_ strong, Daryl,” she told him, her eyes meeting his. His fingers seemed to be itching to just reach out and brush against her blushing cheek, but he pushed the urge away.

“What the fuck happened, Beth?” he asked her, his thumb instead brushing against her hand that he was apparently holding without realizing it.

And so she told him.

She told him about the warehouse and how she had seen the broken glass but hadn't thought much of it and how she had gone to the office and opened the door without checking for any sounds first. How she had then been chased by walkers and run right into one before falling on the glass, cutting her palms and unknowingly getting a shard lodged into her side. She told him how Abraham of all people, had been the one to come to her aid and how he had carried her out and saved her life by stopping the bleeding the best he could and how they had rushed her back to the farmhouse.

Daryl held her hand the entire time that she talked, squeezing it every once in a while when it struck him just how close he had come to almost losing her again.

“It was my own fault, really,” Beth insisted. “I was stupid and got distracted and I know I should have listened to you when you told me to watch myself better...”

“We all make mistakes,” he told her, thumb brushing against the small band aids that Morgan had used on the smaller cuts on her palms. Beth looked at him for just a moment, clearly expecting him to say something else too, but he didn't. She sighed a bit and then her eyes began dropping again. “Ya should get some sleep,” he whispered to her. “Rest up.”

“Will you be here when I wake up?” Beth asked, her voice just as low.

“I need to clean up, but I'll be close,” he said.

Beth nodded a little, closing her eyes. “I missed you so bad, Daryl,” she murmured, falling asleep almost instantly after she had spoken.

He looked at her for another moment, reaching out to her cheek, his fingers hovering over the scar there that he knew she had gotten while she had been in that damned hospital. Before he could touch it though, he pulled his hand back and looked away from her now relaxed form. “I missed you too,” he returned, knowing that she was no longer able to hear him. “I missed you so bad when you were gone, Beth...”

He stayed there for another minute or two, making sure that she would be okay and that she wouldn't just wake up in pain or something before finally standing up and walking out of the room. In the hallway, he was surprised to see Abraham standing, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. The two of them looked at each other for a while, until Abraham cleared his throat.

“How's she doin'?” he asked, his voice a little rough, but at the same time, Daryl was sure he detected some genuine concern there, which took him a bit aback. His eyes focused on the bruise on Abraham's jaw for a moment before he answered.

“She's asleep now... She told me what ya did,” Daryl said. “Guess I have to thank ya for lookin' out for her. Basically savin' her life an' all that.”

“Ya were right when ya said that she's a stubborn one,” Abraham said, pushing away from the wall. “If it would'a been anyone else, I'm sure just the shock alone would'a killed 'em. She's strong, your girl.”

Daryl looked at him sharply then. “Beth ain't my girl,” he said, but it sounded like an outright lie even to his own ears.

Abraham shook his head and chuckled. “Ya keep sayin' that, but I ain't so sure 'bout it,” he told him. “She woke up while we were stitchin' her up an' she kept askin' where ya were. One would have to be blind not to see that the two of ya care 'bout each other as more than just bein' part of the same family.”

Daryl opened his mouth to protest, but it died in his throat, because he simply just couldn't find it in himself to deny it again. And what did that mean then? That he was ready to tell her the truth? That he was ready to accept it himself?

“So ya care 'bout her,” Abraham shrugged, as if he was picking up on Daryl's inner dilemma. “If you're worried 'bout her age, ya should know from Ros and me that age is just a number in this World. That _lil' Lady_ in there cares 'bout you too, an' I know it ain't my business, but I thought ya deserved to know.”

Daryl didn't know what to say, but he did meet Abraham's eyes. The man didn't seem like he was going to take back what he had said and he did look like he really wasn't going to try to meddle. Daryl knew him well enough by now to know that he wouldn't. He might have still been mad at Abraham for threatening Beth that night during the emergency meeting they had had, but he knew that Abraham really was sorry for the way he had acted then. If anything, Daryl believed that the other man's actions– keeping Beth alive– had earned him Daryl's forgiveness too.

“Thank you,” Daryl said again, hoping that those two words would be enough to make Abraham understand. It seemed like it was because Abraham visibly relaxed and shot him a small grin  before nodding and walking away. Daryl watched him go for a moment before turning to glance back at Beth's door. He would just take a shower quickly and then he would check on her again, he told himself. He also swore to himself that he would never again let her go out on a run without him and that he would do everything in his power so that something like this never happened again.

The truck tracks he had found and his suspicions about something bigger being at play with the walker heard were all once again forgotten.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh-oh... Daryl was so sidetracked by Beth's injury that he completely forgot about the tracks he found in the woods... And he missed her and she missed him! And, don't you all think that Abraham redeemed himself in this chapter? He's gotten a big plus in my book at least! :)
> 
> Please, do share what you liked the most about this chapter and I'll do my best to start writing the next one tomorrow! Remember, that it's in the next one that Beth finds out about her and Daryl being alone AND it's one of my favorites because of it! So, an extra push to write is always appreciated! ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading and showing your support! Massive hug to all of you and I can't wait to see what you thought about the chapter when I wake up tomorrow! :) xx


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl does something for Beth and someone tells Beth that she and Daryl were alone for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people! Wohooo! This story officially has 400 reviews on fanfiction and a lot of comments here on AO3 too! Thank you so much for the support and love! *Throws Bethyl confetti at all of you*
> 
> Okay, so first off I wanted to say that I know I never updated on Sunday, but as those of you who follow me on twitter or tumblr know, I've been very busy with a project in school and I haven't had much time to write these last two weeks. I have one more thing now this Sunday, which means that I won't be able to update anything then either, but after that, things should slow down a bit so I can focus on writing and finishing this story.
> 
> About this chapter: there might not be so many Bethyl scenes in it, but it is still one of my favorites, mainly because Beth finds out that she and Daryl were alone. Also, since I ship Richonne too, I really couldn't help myself with the last scene of this chapter, so I hope you don't mind it! I mean, as you've all said so many times: this story isn't just about Bethyl, even though they are the main focus of it! The characters around them are still important and everything eventually comes back, full circle, so just bear with me! :)
> 
> Now, without wasting more of your time, please enjoy this chapter and don't forget to read the ending note! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 19

Daryl raised his hand and knocked on the door.

More specifically: he knocked on _Beth's_ door.

Three days had passed since that day when the two of them has been separated, only for her run to go bad and for his insides to twist and turn out of worry. Three days and Beth had continuously tried to insist that she was okay, despite wincing with every move she made and still having to have Morgan clean her wound several times over every day. They were worried about what they would do if she got an infection and the older man was trying his best to keep that from happening.

Even though Morgan hadn't spoken much since Beth had come back, Daryl could tell that the man was more than worried about the young woman he had come to see as his daughter. Beth kept saying that she was fine, but Morgan always successfully shut her up with a single look.

Daryl had been going to Beth's room every single morning, since he was usually the first one to wake up and he had taken it upon himself to always be the first one to check on her.

”Come in,” Beth's muffled voice came from the other side of the door. Daryl didn't wait much longer to open it and enter.

Beth was laying on her back with her journal in her hands, scribbling something down quickly. She closed the little book and looked up at him and Daryl tried his hardest to convince himself that he had only imagined how her face seemed to have brightened when she'd spotted him.

”Hey,” he said, stepping inside, closing the door behind himself. He didn't want to wake anyone else up because it was still early and he didn't want anyone to overhear him and Beth. It wasn't as if they would actually _do_ anything, but he liked keeping their conversations private. ”Did ya sleep well?”

”Mhm,” Beth nodded, biting her lip as she dropped her book on the floor next to her bed.

”Still in pain, huh,” Daryl grunted.

It wasn't a question.

Beth shifted a little, cringing when she twisted her side a bit too much,” How do you always know?” Her tone was almost accusatory, which caused Daryl to raise his eyebrow at her.

”A horse threw me once,” he told her. ”Shot myself in the side with one of my bolts. Pretended it didn't hurt though it did.”

A smile spread across Beth's lips. ” I almost wish I had been there to see it,” she said. ”The horse throwing you, I mean. It must  ha ve been a sight.”

Daryl snorted,” Fell into a ravine too...”

”Ouch,” Beth winced, but he wasn't sure whether it was because she was imagining his fall or because she was hurting too.

“D'ya want me to get Morgan?” Daryl asked, but Beth shook her head at him.

“I'm fine,” she said. “Just a little uncomfortable, that's all.”

Daryl wanted to ask her if she needed anything else, but at the same time he didn't want to coddle her. She got enough of that from Maggie as it was. Apparently, the two sisters had talked out their issues, or at least some of them, and Daryl was glad for them. He had seen the way it was tearing at Beth that she couldn't talk to her sister and the last few days, since Beth had been injured, they had been taking things slow, easing back into the relationship they had had before their fallout.

“What are your plans for the day?” Beth asked him and he looked up at her. Her hand was resting by her side as she patted the bed lightly, clearly telling him to take a seat, but only if he felt like it. Daryl moved forward and sat next to her, both his hands resting on his knees as he looked down at the journal she had been writing in before.

“Need to repair the wall,” he told her. “Make it stronger than before.”

“That's all you're gonna do?” she asked, making him glance at her with his eyebrow raised.

“Ain't that enough?” he countered.

Beth shrugged, “I was just wondering... I guess I get bored up here alone. I wish I could come outside too.”

“Maybe ya can,” Daryl said. “We'll set up a chair or somethin' on the porch so ya can get some fresh air.”

“Yeah, and if Maggie or Morgan see me walking around, they'll tie me to the bed,” Beth snorted. “I wish I could sneak out.”

Daryl contemplated it for a moment, looking out her window that Morgan had left open a little so that the air would circulate in the room. He wanted to give her everything she asked for, but he didn't want to seem too forward either. Since her accident, he hadn't been able to stop thinking about how close he had once again been to losing her, and it had made him come to a few realizations.

For one, he wasn't sure if he would ever be okay with her going on another run without him there to watch her back. Secondly, the feelings he had had for her before, were not only still there, but ever since he had been reunited with her, they had magnified so much that he didn't think he would ever be able to get rid of them.

The feelings were unspeakable though, at least for him.

He had never thought that he would be capable of feeling such a thing for another human being and it made him a little uneasy. Every time he imagined a scenario where he told Beth how deep his feelings for her ran, he saw a thousand ways that she would push him away out of pure disgust. At the same time, he knew that Beth would probably never do such a thing to him, even if she didn't reciprocate the feeling...but she had changed so much since she had been shot.

Though, at the same time, he still saw the Beth he had known before everything had gone to hell and they had been separated. Sometimes, he just needed to wait a little longer for her to push through and show herself, and he couldn't help but get the feeling that sometimes, Beth was actually holding back a little.

He made his decision then.

“Everyone's asleep,” he blurted, turning to meet her gaze again.

“So?” she blinked a couple of times, clearly confused.

“I'll help ya get downstairs,” he told her, feeling heat creep up his neck. “I'll get ya a chair an' ya can sit on the porch for a while... If ya want?” He swallowed, leaving the last words hanging as a question.

Beth seemed to search his face for a short while. Whatever it was she was looking for, she clearly found it when another blinding smile spread across her face, this time reaching her eyes too. “I'd like that,” she nodded.

His lips twitched, “Okay.”

Daryl got up then and told her to wait for him in the room while he hurried downstairs. He made sure that everyone was indeed asleep and was glad to see that no one was around, or seemed to be waking up any time soon. He got a chair in the kitchen and carried it outside, placing it on the porch before going inside to get some blankets. If she was going to be outside, he didn't want her to freeze, since it was a bit chillier than usual.

He walked back inside and walked up the stairs, toward Beth's room. When he re-entered her room, she was half sitting up, pulling on a thicker hoodie.

“Told ya to wait,” he grunted, walking over to her. Without thinking much about it, he helped her put on the hoodie, being careful so that she wouldn't injure herself further. He zipped it up and then paused, realizing what he was doing. His fingers remained on the metallic zipper, bushing against her chest. His throat suddenly felt a lot tighter and that fluttery feeling appeared in his stomach again as he dared looking up at Beth's face.

She was watching him, blue eyes intently observing his face. Her breathing was coming out a little bit heavier than before, but he tried to tell himself that he was just imagining it. He didn't, however, imagine the way her pupils dilated a bit as she looked at him, or how her hand moved up to grasp his that was _still_ holding that damn little piece of metal.

He let go of her as if he had been burned, quickly looking away, clearing his throat. “I should get ya downstairs before anyone wakes up,” he told her, a little rougher than he had intended to, but he was mad at himself for acting so stupidly.

“Okay,” Beth said, her voice normal, as if nothing at all had happened.

Well, maybe it hadn't, but to Daryl, it sure as hell felt as if it had.

He offered her his hands then and she reached for him, grasping them both as she slowly got out of the bed, only wincing once. Pushing away the awkwardness he had felt just a few moments ago, he was filled with determination instead. He wanted to do this for her and he couldn't just let her walk off without support. So, Daryl held on to one of her hands with his, while his other moved to her hip, carefully placed so that he wouldn't by any chance brush against her bandages. Together, they walked out into the hallway quietly, trying not to wake anyone else. Daryl was certain that if Maggie saw what they were doing, she would explode at them even though there was no real reason to.

When they reached the stairs, Beth sighed loudly, looking at it with worry in her eyes. It was evident that the walk there had been straining enough for her and Daryl glanced down before moving to stand in front of her.

“Don't move,” he instructed as he carefully picked her up into his arms, mindful of her injury once again. Beth let out a small gasp, but from the look on her face, he could tell that it was more out of surprise than pain. One of her arms went around his neck automatically, while the other one that she couldn't move as much moved to his front, where her small hand clutched his shirt tightly.

“Daryl?” Beth said, breathing her unspoken question into the side of his neck. Daryl glanced down at her in his arms and he was almost certain that he felt the hand that was clutching his front grip him even tighter.

“Too slow,” he told her quietly before he began walking down the stairs with her. He was being as quiet as he could, but it was a little bit more difficult as he carried Beth. Morgan was asleep in the living room and he didn't want to wake the other man, even though he knew that he would probably be more reasonable than Maggie would be if she caught them. Still, when he reached the foot of the stairs, he walked right past the snoring Morgan on the couch and got to the door, not once letting go of Beth. He got her outside and carried her to the chair he had set up for her, once again slowly letting her down so that she could sit. She didn't flinch this time and he grabbed the blanket and put it over her legs before taking a small step back, inspecting his work.

Beth closed her eyes and inhaled through her nose, the smile still there. When she opened them and looked at him, Daryl tried his very best not to actually blush under her gaze.

“Thank you so much, Daryl,” Beth whispered.

“T'was nothin',” Daryl mumbled, looking toward where the sun had started rising properly across the fields, in the distance.

“Sit with me, please?” Beth requested, clearly deciding to ignore his way of downplaying what he had done for her. He looked back at her then and nodded curtly, walking over to where she sat. He hadn't brought out another chair and he didn't feel like actually sitting on the porch next to her chair, so instead he settled for leaning against the wall next to her. It didn't take very long for her to reach toward him and take his larger hand in her small one, squeezing it softly as she looked at the rising sun.

“Thank you,” she repeated, sounding so happy and content that it made Daryl's heart just a little warmer than it had been before.

He wanted to tell her that he would do anything she asked of him; that he would do anything for her. But instead, he kept quiet and watched the sun rise with Beth's hand clutched in his own and for the first time in a long time, no worries on his mind.

-§-

The quiet morning didn't last for very long though.

An hour later, Morgan had woken up and found the two of them on the porch together. The other man's eyes seemed to zero in on their hands that were still holding each other and Daryl had pulled away from Beth as fast as he had been able to. Morgan didn't say anything about how the two of them had sneaked Beth out of her room, but there had been a knowing smile on his face that only served to make Daryl uncomfortable.

Half an hour after that, Maggie had woken up and she had held a ten minute long speech to Beth about being reckless for getting out of bed and for not being careful so that she wouldn't get an infection and everything else that she managed to fit in to complain about in that short amount of time. Daryl had earned himself a dark glare when he had snorted, mainly because Beth had looked over at him and rolled her eyes at her sister's over-protectiveness.

Still, not long after that, the entire house was awake and everyone was going off to work on the tasks that Rick had assigned them for the day. Morgan had stepped forward and told Maggie that it would do Beth good to be outside and that she needed to gather strength naturally and on her own terms and it seemed like the man's remark had been enough to shut Maggie up. There seemed to be some new-found, mutual respect going between the man who had been surviving with Beth for seven months and the older Greene sister and Daryl figured that they had bonded over almost losing Beth.

Daryl was supposed to be working the new wall with Abraham and the others, like he had told Beth, but as Maggie had been talking to Beth about being more careful, he had remembered something that he hadn't thought much of these last few days since he had gotten back from his hunt.

“Rick, I need to talk to ya,” Daryl said when he finally left Beth's side. “In private,” he added, sounding every bit as serious as the matter was.

Rick frowned at him but nodded before handing Judith over to Carl who seemed to have been waiting to hold his sister. The two of them walked past the kitchen, where Carol, Tyreese and Sasha were preparing breakfast for everyone and walked to the living room, where no one seemed to be at the moment. Rick closed the door behind them and turned to look at Daryl.

“Everythin' alright?” he asked, sounding concerned. “I noticed that Beth's 'round and about. Is she–”

“She's fine,” Daryl interrupted. “She's better an' just needed some change of scenery.”

“I see,” Rick nodded. “Nice of you to help her out then.” Daryl could hear in Rick's tone that the man was amused, probably imagining how careful Beth and Daryl must have been when they had sneaked Beth out of the house without anyone actually hearing them. “What did ya wanna talk about?” Rick asked then.

“When I was huntin', I saw some strange tracks,” Daryl told him, remembering his worries from a few days ago much more clearly now. “There were tire tracks a mile or so away. I followed the walker prints from the herd that attacked us an' came across 'em.”

Rick tensed, “What are you sayin'?”

“I'm sayin' that I don't think that herd found our farm by accident,” Daryl concluded.

“Ya think someone led them here?” Rick frowned. “Who would do that? If it's true, then how did they even find us?”

“I dunno,” Daryl shrugged, but remained every bit as serious. “Then with Beth getting' hurt on that run... Didn't ya'll say the hardware store had been cleaned out months ago?”

“Yes,” Rick nodded, hand moving over his beard.

“An' Beth mentioned there was glass on the floor, as if someone had broken in,” Daryl reminded him. “The walkers had been _locked_ inside that office, the key still in the door.”

Rick ran a hand through his hair, looking frustrated. “You sayin' you think it was a trap?” he asked for clarification.

“I think there's more goin' on than we previously thought,” Daryl stated. “Too many coincidences, Rick. Too many.” He paused for a moment, allowing himself to think a little deeper on the matter before speaking again. “The herd, those walkers in the office... That group pf bad men we stumbled upon down South? It can't just be a coincidence.”

Rick contemplated what he was saying before nodding slowly. “I agree,” he said. “There's somethin' goin' on and we're gonna need to be careful for a while. I don't want to make the others worry though, so we'll explain it to them when I tell them that we'll be having two people watchin' both in the front and the back of the house.”

Daryl nodded curtly, glad that he had remembered the things he had found on his hunt, but at the same time cursing himself for having gotten so distracted to forget about it in the first place. He didn't want his feelings to cloud his judgment, especially not when it put everyone in his family at risk. At the same time, he knew that he would never be able to just give up on Beth or the emotions that were growing inside of him whenever he laid eyes on her.

He was itching for a smoke suddenly, wondering just when his life had gotten so fucking complicated.

-§-

Two days later, Beth was feeling a lot better. The soreness had gone down immensely and Morgan had told her that he would was cleaning up well and didn't look infected, which they were all glad for. She had begun moving around on her own again, ignoring Maggie's eyes that were still on her like a hawk every now and then, even though she insisted that she was better. Beth guessed that it had something to do with being the older sister, but she tried not to think about it too much.

Daryl and the others in the group had been working on reinforcing the walls the last few days while Beth had been put on partial house arrest. She wasn't allowed to wander off outside without someone with her and she always needed to tell someone if she was going somewhere. Not that she had been walking around much during these two days. Instead, she opted for sitting in the living room, catching up on some reading or relaxing back to write some in her journal. Bits and pieces of a new memory had been coming back to her for days, but she still had that one little snippet from before her accident running through her mind a few times every other hour or so.

The memory of Daryl glancing at her, saying something about something being like a 'damn romance novel' made her wonder just what the man had been talking about. It didn't seem like a comment that someone who  _hadn't_ been close to her at some point would just say, but at the same time, Beth had seen Daryl be blunt a few times with others in their group, even though he always seemed more reserved around her.

Still, ever since being caught on the porch two days ago, it seemed like Daryl had once again decided to distance himself a little. Or at least he was trying to keep himself busy, as far as she could tell. On the other hand, the wall needed to be re-built and it wasn't going to just fix itself, so of course he would be out there every day, helping the best he could. It was partially why she liked him so much. Because no matter what, Daryl always seemed to put their group first and Beth admired that about him more than anything else.

“Hey, Beth,” Rick said as he entered the living room, carrying little Judith in his arms. He put the toddler down on the carpet along with a stuffed animal that they had brought back on a run a while ago. Beth watched as the little girl played with the toy and smiled at Rick.

“Hi,” she greeted Rick back. “You've trimmed your beard a bit, I see,” she pointed out then, putting her book down as she moved a little so that he could join her on the couch.

Rick scratched his chin a little and nodded. “Michonne said it was getting' too out of control,” he admitted sheepishly.

“Do you always listen to Michonne when she tell you things, or is it just when it comes to how you look?” Beth raised an eyebrow at him.

Rick glanced at her and chuckled, “She gives good advice.”

“Maybe I should have told her that we're gonna be celebrating Christmas and that we're gonna need your beard if we can't find a fake one,” Beth said, eyes glinting with mischief as she teased the man, who let out another laugh. She didn't think she had ever seen Rick so relaxed before, but it was good to do so, especially after everything that had happened this past week.

“I'll keep that in mind,” he told her, nodding curtly. “I don't think any of us would'a ever believed we'd have a place safe enough to celebrate Christmas,” he added after a while. “It would do us good, I think. Gettin' back to normal... Or at least the closest we can get to normal these days.”

Beth watched him quietly before reaching over to grab his hand. “Hey,” she said quietly, “we're doing the best we can to keep living. This isn't just about survival anymore.”

“I know,” Rick sighed, covering her hand with his rougher one. He looked tired and worn and she felt bad for him, knowing how torturous it must have been for him to be on the road for seven months, trying to keep everyone alive, including his kids.

“I just never thought something like this could be possible,” Rick continued, his thumb brushing against her hand as he looked down at Judith. “It just feels like every damn time that I let my guard down, something goes wrong... The herd, Noah, you and those walkers at the hardware store... Maybe Daryl is right about something else going on, but I just can't see it yet.”

Beth frowned then, tearing her eyes away from the little girl who was giggling and crawling around on the floor to look back at Rick. “What do you mean Daryl thinks something else might be going on?” she asked, looking at him confusedly.

“He hasn't told you?” Rick questioned, sounding surprised at that.

“No,” Beth shook her head, “he hasn't.” She pulled back her hand from Rick's and rested them in her lap instead, looking at him expectantly. He had been the one to mention that Daryl thought something might be happening and that meant that she now wanted to know what they were suspecting.

“He thinks there might be a connection with the walkers in the store that attacked you and the herd that got Noah killed,” Rick told her. She was glad that he didn't mention Father Gabriel to her because she was still angry over everything that had gone down that day.

“Why would he think that?” Beth wondered.

“He followed some tracks,” Rick explained. “Then he found truck tire tracks. He thinks someone might have brought the herd on us on purpose.”

“And the walkers in the store? What's the connection there?” Beth's mind was already trying to make sense of the bigger picture that Daryl had clearly seen. It didn't take long for her to put two and two together. “The broken glass,” she realized. “The walkers being locked in by someone... The key–”

“Daryl said the same thing,” Rick mused. “Seems like you two think similarly.”

“There has to be a connection though, right?” Beth said, not really wanting to think about how she and Daryl were thinking the same things according to Rick.

“Maybe... We're gonna need to keep an eye open on anything suspicious,” Rick told her. “I already told Daryl that I'd be telling everyone that we need to have more people guarding and keeping watch durin' the night.”

“Regular patrols in the woods might also be a good idea,” Beth pointed out.

“Good thinking,” Rick agreed.

The sudden giggles of Judith filled the room, making both Rick and Beth turn their attention back to the little girl who started crawling toward Beth. She sat on the floor and reached up, making grabby hands toward Beth smiling at her brightly, showing the little teeth that had grown out in her mouth. Beth felt a little panicked suddenly, looking over at Rick who looked at Judith for a moment before something almost unreadable flashed through his face. It seemed like whatever it was that his baby girl was doing, it was bringing back something to him that he hadn't been thinking about for a while.

“Do ya wanna hold her?” Rick asked then, looking back at Beth. “She's settles pretty easily, so I don't think she'll move around enough to actually hurt you.”

Beth looked down at Judith again and her expression softened a bit when the little girl once again tried to reach for her, her hands settling on pulling at the blanket.

Beth cleared her throat, “Could you help me with her?”

Rick nodded and stood, reaching down to take a hold of Judith. Beth raised her hands to take the toddler from him and he hovered for a bit, making sure that they were both settled before sitting down again next to Beth. Beth looked down at the girl in her hands and felt a smile slowly spreading on her lips. She bounced Judith a little as she seemed to settle against Beth, her dark blonde head resting against Beth's shoulder, little hand reaching up to clutch Beth's shirt.

“Hey,” Beth cooed, looking down at Judith. This was the first time she was holding her since Rick and the others had come to the farm. She had felt some kind of over-protectiveness for the young child, but she had never actually dared to hold her before. “You're not scary at all, are you?” Beth whispered, brushing her finger against Judith's chubby cheeks as the girl's eyes seemed to flutter shut. Humming a little to herself, Beth continued to move her in her arms in a small rocking pace, careful that she wouldn't move too much to hurt herself in the process. She glanced over at Rick, who seemed a little moved by the whole thing, which only served to confuse Beth even more.

Until, of course, images of something flashed in her mind.

She saw herself, holding a baby. Then Daryl, feeding a little infant that was wrapped up in a blanket, naming it “Lil´Asskicker”. She literally _felt_ the weight of having carried around a baby, humming to it and quietly singing lullabies when no one was around.

Beth closed her eyes, forcing her mind to focus as the images became a little clearer. She was walking around in something that seemed a lot like... _a cell?_

Her eyes snapped open and she breathed heavily as she stared at Rick, who was looking at her worriedly.

“Please take her,” Beth breathed out, looking down at Judith who had fallen asleep in her arms.

Rick immediately reached over and took his sleeping daughter from Beth's hands while Beth put a hand to her forehead, feeling the aftereffects of getting another memory back.

“Is everything okay?” Rick asked her. “Should I get Morgan? Are you in pain?”

“I'm okay,” Beth said, shaking her head at the help he offered. “I just remembered something, I think?”

“You remembered something...” Rick repeated, trailing off as he clearly waited for whether she would tell him about it or not.

“Did we ever...? This is going to sound crazy,” Beth said, letting out a shaky laugh. “Did we ever live in...a prison or something? Some place with cells?”

Rick tensed, his eyes widening a little as he looked at her. He seemed to be torn on what to say and what to keep from her, which gave Beth the answer she needed.

They must have indeed once lived in a prison and she wondered what it was that made Rick hesitate to just tell her.

“Please talk to me,” Beth pleaded. “I'm asking you to tell me. I want to know and I promise that I won't get a panic attack or whatever else it is that you and everyone else seems to think I'll get if you tell me something about my past.”

“It's not that, Beth,” Rick sighed. “You know that we all agreed that it would be better for you to take your time with getting your memories back.”

“Well, if I already remembered the major parts of it, could it really hurt that you just fill in the remaining gaps?” Beth asked, narrowing her eyes.

Rick contemplated it for a moment before his expression changed. Beth could see that she had won him over and suppressed the urge to actually grin at him.

“After a long winter on the roads, we found a prison,” Rick began telling her. “Lori,” he visible flinched, “my wife... she was pregnant with Judy and we needed a safe place, not just for her to give birth in but also somewhere we could hope to live for a longer period.”

“The prison,” Beth acknowledged and Rick confirmed it with a nod. “Carl told me what happened to Lori... I'm sorry that you had to go through that, Rick.”

“It was a long time ago,” Rick said quietly. “Or maybe it wasn't, but it just feels like it? I don't know...”

“So Judith was born there,” Beth concluded, deciding that it was better to keep the conversation going rather than to have Rick hurting over the past. “Why did we leave if we were safe there?”

“Because we _weren't_ ,” Rick said, his jaw clenching. “There was a man who called himself the Governor. He started attacking us because he felt threatened that we, as a bigger group, lived in such a secure place. He was crazy...”

Beth contemplated it for a moment, puzzling together the things he wasn't telling her. “Did he kill my father?” she asked, remembering Daryl's outburst toward Maggie regarding her memory of their father's decapitation. She knew that it was the only thing that would make sense and it would also explain why Rick had been so hesitant to tell her about the prison.

“Yes,” Rick finally nodded, a sadness washing over his face as he clearly remembered Beth's father. “He was the one who killed your dad, Hershel... He was a good man, Beth, and he didn't deserve the end he got.” Beth once again didn't know what to say, so she just kept her mouth shut. “Either way, after that, the prison was overrun by walkers and we had to get out of there,” Rick continued. “Carl and I got out together and we found Michonne a couple of days or so later... Time wasn't really something we could relate to anymore by then. I was still messed up from my fight with the Governor.”

“What about Judith?” Beth frowned, looking at the little girl in Rick's arms. Rick lifted the toddler and pressed a kiss to her forehead, making the little girl's eyes flutter open. Beth wanted to ask if it really was a good idea to wake her, but Rick didn't seem too bothered by it and Judith immediately began playing with her father's beard, so she didn't say anything.

“We were separated for a good while,” he told Beth. “Carl and I thought we'd lost her, but she was with Tyreese and Carol the entire time.”

“You didn't get out together?” Beth wondered.

“No,” Rick said. “We all got separated. Glenn was left behind at the prison, looking for Maggie. Maggie got out with Sasha and–” Rick abruptly cut himself off, closing his eyes. “Another man named Bob... He died.”

Beth didn't need to ask for the details, knowing that whatever it was that had caused the man's death, it couldn't have been pretty.

Rick cleared his throat, “Either way, Glenn found Tara and the two of them started after the bus that was supposed to work as an emergency exit and they ended up crossing paths with Abe, Rosita and Eugene. You and Daryl got out together, but we didn't see you again until–”

“What?” Beth turned sharply, looking at him with wide eyes. Rick watched her and his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “You said that Daryl and I got out together?”

“Yeah?” Rick nodded curtly, still not understanding what Beth's question was.

Beth bit her lip, turning to glance out the window, as if she was expecting Daryl to pop up out of nowhere to tell Rick to shut up, because clearly, he had never planned on sharing the fact that the two of them had been alone for a period of time with Beth. How could he have kept such a thing from her? She trusted him more than anyone besides Morgan, and he had had plenty of opportunities to tell her the truth, just like Maggie had. Why hadn't he just told her? What else was he hiding?

“You didn't know?” Rick asked, eyebrows shooting up when Beth shook her head. He clearly hadn't been expecting that.

“Daryl never told me,” Beth swallowed. She couldn't exactly say that she wasn't angry at Daryl for lying to her, since he had basically done the same thing that Maggie had. Although, she knew that Maggie had kept things from her to save her own skin, so to speak, but from what Beth understood, Daryl seemed like the kind of man who owned up to what he had done... It didn't make any sense for him to _not_ tell her that they had been alone.

“ _Rick._ ”

Beth and Rick turned at the same time to see Michonne standing by the door. She looked as calm as she always did, but Beth could see that she had overheard what Rick had told Beth.

“Did you know about this?” Beth asked, her tone coming out accusatory.

Michonne merely eyed her before her head moved an inch in a half-nod. “It wasn't any of our business telling you though,” Michonne said, looking sharply at Rick before turning her attention back to Beth, walking a little closer.

“Why?” Beth demanded. “Why wouldn't he tell me? Why would he lie about the two of us never being friends? How long were we alone? How log did we have just each other to depend on?”

The questions kept filling her head, swirling inside her brain, mixing with the few memories she had gotten back already, as if she was trying to figure out whether Daryl had been there for some of them. Her head hurt a little and she rubbed her temples, closing her eyes.

“Could'a been weeks,” Rick said slowly. “Told you, time gets all mixed up... After the prison we were all very confused for a while...”

“We don't know how long you two were alone exactly,” Michonne said. “You were taken from him by some people... He was on his own after that.”

Beth's breath was coming out a little heavier as she remembered the night that she had gotten one of her first memories back; the night she had remembered her name. She had remembered a man shouting her name over and over again and the more she thought about it, the more that muffled voice turned into Daryl's familiar tone. She swallowed thickly, a bitter taste in her mouth when she realized that it must have been from the night that she had been _taken_. But taken _where_?

“Why hasn't he told me all of this? Why wouldn't he say anything when I asked him...?” Beth asked quietly.

Rick reached over and took her hand gently. “Michonne's right,” he told her. “It isn't any of our business, whatever happened or didn't happen when you and Daryl were alone,  _or_ what Daryl is thinking.”

"But if I wanted to know what you thought?” Beth countered, looking at them both. “What if I wanted you to tell me your opinion on why he hasn't told me anything?”

Michonne walked a bit closer, sitting down on the other side of her, resting her hand on Beth's knee. “I for one would tell you that Dixon has gotten it into his head that you're better off not knowing,” she said, looking intently into Beth's eyes as if she was trying to convey some kind of secret message.

“But why would he...” Beth trailed off, thinking back at all the times she had caught Daryl looking at her when she secretly glanced his way. There was always some far-away-look on his face and as soon as he saw that she was watching him, he would turn away and pretend that it had never happened. She remembered how he had gotten when that man had held her pressed against him in the mall, how he had fought and then killed the man who had laid his filthy hands on her slowly and agonizingly.

Her heart hammered wildly in her chest when the pieces started falling into place once again. Every time he had tried to tell her that the two of them hadn't been close, he had never been able to _really_ look her in the eyes. The first few weeks on the farm, he had pretty much avoided her like the plague and it wasn't until she had approached him herself that he had talked to her, and even _then_ it had been reluctantly. When she had made it clear to him that she wasn't just going to let him ignore her and that she wanted them to be friends, he had allowed the two of them to spend more time together, up to the point that he had naturally become the person she first sought out when she entered a room or stepped outside.

There had been something there before that too though. The moment she had laid eyes on him that night that they had all arrived at the farm, she had felt something in her chest; something that had told her that she  _should_ know this man. He had become a mystery that she wanted to figure out, a puzzle of her past that she wanted to solve, but it had always felt like he would only let her come close enough to touch the walls that he had surrounded himself with, never letting her crash through them. She had seen them crack though, especially this week after she had almost died again. When she had told him that morning that he had returned from his hunt that she had missed him, she had seen that he had missed her too in his eyes, even though she had fallen asleep before she could hear his reply.

All the things that she had naturally known when she had been alone with Morgan. Her hunting and tracking skills, her fighting technique... No one had ever commented on it and Beth wondered whether anyone had ever actually known that she knew how to do all those things. If she and Daryl had been separated from the group for a while and she had then in turn been separated from Daryl before he had met up with the group again, maybe they had never actually known that she had  _learned_ those things? Did that mean that Daryl had been the one to teach her or had she learned it somewhere else?

Somewhere amongst all those questions, that bubbly feeling appeared in her gut again. It was  just a hunch, a mere suspicion,  but Beth wondered whether there was at least just a tiny chance that there might be some truth to it. It would explain why Daryl would think that she was better off not knowing that the two of them had been alone and why he acted the way he did towards her.

What if Daryl had developed some kind of  _feelings_ for her?

What if the reason he didn't want her knowing that they had been alone was that he actually felt guilty for it and that he in some twisted way blamed  _himself_ for what had happened to her?

The anger she had initially felt at finding out that Daryl had kept things from her slowly ebbed away and was replaced by something else that she couldn't quite name. She was confused and she needed time to think things through, because she didn't want to do something hasty and confront Daryl about it, risking ruining the friendship they had built up so far. Something told her that if Daryl knew that Rick and Michonne had spilled some of the beans regarding this, he would not only get mad at the two of them, but he would also start pushing Beth away again, which would only infuriate her. She couldn't risk that.

“Please don't tell Daryl that you told me all of this,” Beth said, looking at Michonne and Rick again. Judith was still gurgling on in Rick's lap, happily unaware of the turmoil that was inside of Beth.

“We didn't actually tell you much,” Rick pointed out.

“It was enough,” Beth told him. “I don't want Daryl to know anything though until I figure out a way to talk to him.”

“Why not just ask him about it? Tell him you remembered or something?” Michonne shrugged.

“I'm not ready yet,” Beth admitted and it was the truth. She wasn't really sure if she was ready to hear the truth from Daryl either because what if the attraction she felt for him was something that had started a long time ago, back when they had been alone? She didn't think she was ready to know that yet, at least not until she tried to make sense of the things she had learned today.

“Okay,” Michonne nodded then. “We'll keep our mouths shut.”

“We promise,” Rick agreed.

Beth rubbed her temples again, the headache coming in a bit stronger now. “I think I'm going to go and lay down for a bit. I'm not feeling well,” she told them. “Thank you for being honest with me.” She leaned over and pressed a light kiss against Rick's cheek before turning to Michonne, repeating the action. Slowly, she stood from the couch, careful so that she wouldn't hurt her side again and walked off toward the stairs, climbing them slowly. She got to her room and laid down on her bed, looking up at the ceiling.

_ 'What if he was in love with you?'  _ a voice in the back of her mind asked, and she tried to shake it away, telling herself that it was an impossible thought that she had just conjured up to make herself feel better about the small, albeit growing, crush that she had on the man. She was just tired and all the new information she had gotten was clearly messing with her head. It needed to be thought over though and she couldn't just jump the gun and confront Daryl out of the blue, so she needed time to figure it out.

“It's crazy,” she whispered to herself as she stared up at the ceiling, but the fluttering feeling in her stomach told her that maybe, it wasn't that crazy at all.

-§-

Rick watched Beth go and disappear up the stairs before turning to Michonne. She was already moving to sit a little closer and without even having to think about it, he handed Judith over to her.  His daughter giggled and grabbed one of Michonne's dreadlocks, pulling at it a little, but Michonne didn't seem to mind as she only smiled down at Judith, shifting her in her lap.

“Do you think we did the right thing?” Rick asked then. “Telling Beth about her and Daryl being alone?”

“I think it was about time someone in the group slipped up and told her,” Michonne mused, looking over at him. “Daryl would never have told her and she deserved to know.”

“I swear I didn't plan on telling her,” Rick said. “It just came out by accident and then there was no way of stopping it.”

“As I said: It was about time someone _slipped up_ ,” Michonne enunciated, giving him a pointed look.

“What if Daryl finds out?” Rick sighed. “Do ya think he'll be mad?”

“I think he'll be too wrapped up in Beth by then that he won't spare you another glance,” Michonne told him. “Don't worry about your bromance though. If anything can survive in this world, it's your friendship with Daryl Dixon.”

Her comment made Rick's lips tug upward and he looked away as it grew into a full-blown smile. For the first time in a long time, he felt at ease with himself and everything around them. Sure, he was still worried about Daryl's suspicions, but for now, there wasn't much they would be able to do about it. They couldn't go out and investigate it properly, but they were doing what they could.

“I remember when I first suspected there had been something between Beth and Daryl,” Rick said, his voice low as if he was worried that someone might overhear him.

Michonne nodded, “Back at the bar.”

“Yeah,” Rick drawled, remembering the broken look in Daryl's eyes when Rick had acknowledged that something had changed while he and Beth had been alone.

“If anything, I think everything about the way he was after the hospital made it even more evident,” Michonne said. “How he wouldn't let us just bury her without a coffin... How he said that she deserved better than that, without actually saying anything...”

They let her words hang in the air and Rick finally nodded, agreeing with her, just as he found himself doing pretty much all the time these last few months. 

He looked at Michonne, at the woman he knew he could trust not only with his kids, but also with his life at this point. They both knew that something had changed between Daryl and Beth, but it was hard to ignore the fact that something had changed between them too. The seven months that they had been on the roads, he had always turned toward Michonne for advice, especially when Daryl hadn't been in his right mind. The woman had taken care of his kids as if they were her own and he was both grateful for it and respected her more than ever for everything she had done for him. He knew that Carl was good friends with Michonne too, and that he confided in her whenever he couldn't talk to Rick. Never had Rick thought the day would come that he could imagine himself being with another woman after Lori, but even though he knew that he would always love his wife and hold her memory dear, Michonne seemed to have somehow unknowingly nestled her way into his heart. He hadn't even realized it until now, but there always seemed to be some kind of understanding between them that no matter what happened, they would endure and stick it out together.

“Do you think... Do you think we'll ever be happy again?” Rick breathed out, meeting her eyes as she looked up at him. Judith was still tugging on her hair and Rick realized that he had caught her off guard with the question.

It didn't surprise him though, when Michonne reached over and took his hand and she didn't look very shocked when he intertwined their fingers.

“I do,” she told him, nodding slowly. She seemed to search his face for something and before he could second-guess himself, he leaned over and pressed light kiss to her cheek, just like Beth had done before. When he pulled back, Michonne was still looking at him, but her lips were tugging up a bit at the corners. Her fingers tightened around his a bit and he didn't hesitate to squeeze back just as lightly. She shifted Judith in her arms a little as she moved a little closer to him, her side pressing against his before she actually leaned her head against his shoulder.

“I do think we'll be happy again,” she repeated. “We deserve happiness.”

As always, Rick agreed with her as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, looking down at his daughter in her lap before pressing another kiss to Michonne's face, this time on her forehead. Judith giggled and pulled at Michonne's hair again and Rick watched as Michonne lifted her finger to lightly brush it against Judith's cheek.

Yeah, he told himself. They did deserve happiness.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, Beth is taking it a bit slower with Daryl than she did with Maggie. She's suspecting that he had feelings for her before, but she doesn't want to scare him away. And we FINALLY got some one-on-one time with Rick and Beth, and she held baby Judith!
> 
> This was something I always planned on being the "big reveal" moment for Beth, so I really hope that you liked the way I decided to play things. Chapter 20 might be a little shorter, but it's going to have A LOT of Bethyl in it! Now that Beth knows about her and Daryl being alone, she kind of has the upper hand there and she's going to try and figure him out before she says anything to him. Oh, and you should probably know that chapter 21 is another one of my ABSOLUTE favorites! Tension, tension, tension! Oh, and the bad guys will be dealt with soon too! :)
> 
> Another thing I just wanted to say is that no matter what happens on Sunday, whether Beth comes back or not, I WILL finish this story and I'll always write for this fandom! I have a one-shot being written which is happier, with Eric and Aaron, Daryl and Beth all living together and Aaric trying to play matchmakers for Bethyl, not knowing that they've been together secretly the entire time and I'm hoping that maybe I can finish it some time next week. Also, I was thinking about writing that scene that I mentioned in a previous chapter here on Blink, the one where Daryl overheard Beth singing to Judith in the prison and how she ultimately calmed him down without even knowing that she was being watched? It could probably be read as a stand-alone one-shot, so let me know if you think I should write it. My point is that no matter what happens, I won't believe Beth is actually gone until we know for sure what they did with her body. If they don't show us that, I'll hold on and keep believing until they do (even if it means waiting 56 more seasons!)!
> 
> So yeah, that said, thank you for always showing your support and thank you for reading and taking time to actually comment on this story. You have no idea how much it means to me to be accepted into a fandom like this. You're all amazing and I love you, but please remember, NO SPOILERS in the reviews if you happen to come across this story after the SF! I'll be off of social media for 24 hours until I have the chance to watch the episode and I'll remove both tumblr, twitter and instagram from my phone so I won't be tempted to look at spoilers. Until then, you can feel free to message me on tumblr or send me a tweet!
> 
> Thank you once again for reading and I hope to hear from you all soon! Remember: reviews mean motivation to write! :)
> 
> xx


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth is confused after having found out that she and Daryl were alone. She doesn't know why he would keep such a thing from her and isn't sure on what her next move should be. In the end, she takes a small risk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey peeps! Thank you for being so patient with me and my busy schedule! I'm sorry for not updating last week, but in case you missed it, I did put up that one-shot with Aaric and Bethyl living together! It's called "The Art of Subtle Matchmaking" if you wanna check it out and don't forget to drop a few lines! ;)
> 
> Special thanks to Katerinas here on AO3 for reading and commenting and just making it a lot easier for me to get inspired to write the chapter faster! If you guys like Normily too, you should totally go to her page and read her Normily fic! It's called "Sweetly Broken" and it's awesome! :D
> 
> Thank you so much for the immense support I've gotten so far. You guys always amaze me with your kindness and love for this story. I'm already writing the next chapter, which I want you, will have a little steam in it. But for now, enjoy this little chapter and some *cough* sexual *cough* tension! *winks*

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 20

Sometimes Beth wondered if dead people rising was the only side effect of the world ending. The question usually swam in her head in the early mornings, when she'd wake up and stare out her window, only to see the sun shining brightly even though yesterday's sky had been gray and cloudy. She would leave her window open a little during the night since she had gotten used to it while she had been recovering from her wound. Now, another week had passed and she was feeling a lot better, but the window was still left open to allow fresh air to fill her lungs every morning.

The weather seemed to go from bad to good to better again, and every single day, Beth opened only one of her eyes to peer out the window to get a clue of what to expect during the day. At times she didn't even need to look. It was enough to just breathe in through her nose and sense the impending rainfall.

She supposed that was what Autumn was like now.

Things had moved slow this past week. The weather was more glum than sunny, but today it felt almost as nice as a Spring day would. For seven whole days though, the weather hadn't been the only thing Beth had been thinking about.

Daryl Dixon sure had been on her mind a lot too.

Ever since Rick had let it slip that she and Daryl had been alone after the prison they had lived in had fallen, Beth hadn't been able to stop wondering about what may or may not have transpired between them. Why had Daryl tried to avoid her in the beginning? Why hadn't he been able to keep his distance after she had first approached him? Why was he always watching her back and protecting her? Why did he stand up for her and how did he _always_ seem to know what she was thinking before she even said it?

_ Why? _

Rick and Michonne had told her that Daryl had gotten it into his head that she was better off without him. Beth hadn't understood it at first but then she had remembered some of the moments they had shared since Daryl had come to the farm and she remembered the way her stomach always tightened in a most pleasurable way whenever she saw him... Pleasurable and _nervous_.

He did things to her that she wasn't even sure he was aware of and she wondered, if she too did things to him sometimes.

She hadn't put any distance between them though, since she had found out, and she had tried her best not to show that she knew more about them than he had ever let on. They had been growing closer and she felt like she could talk to him about everything and anything; _except_ the fact that she knew that he was outright lying to her about their past relationship.

Or maybe it wasn't as much as lying as it was trying to protect her from himself, which made no sense to her whatsoever because she never felt more safe than she did when she was with him.

“Ya feelin' any better?” Daryl asked her as they walked side by side, as they usually did nowadays. They had started taking early morning walks together, leaving the house before anyone else woke up and coming back just before breakfast. Their main excuse was usually checking the newly built wall and no one seemed to protest after what had happened to Noah because of Father Gabriel.

“As I've said every mornin' this week: I'm _fine_ , Daryl,” Beth smiled, looking down at the grass by her feet as they walked.

“Can't blame a guy for askin',” Daryl shrugged. “Ya don't exactly tell us when you're in pain.”

That was true, but Beth would never admit it out loud.

At times she would still feel the stinging in her side, but she knew that it was nothing compared to the pain she had felt initially when she had accidentally impaled herself with the glass shard in the hardware store. She was getting headaches too lately, but she figured that it was because she didn't get many hours of sleep, always thinking about Daryl and her and what else he might be keeping from her.

“Maybe we can go on a hunt when you're better,” Daryl then said. Beth glanced at him from the corner of her eye. “If ya wanna, I mean...”

“Of course I want to, Daryl,” Beth answered. “And since I'm feelin' better already, you probably won't have to wait too long.”

Beth was a little startled when he reached out and grasped her wrist, halting her movements. She turned around and faced him sharply, his intense blue eyes boring straight into her soul. It was hard to suppress the urge to shudder, but she managed to do so, not wanting to make a fool out of herself for always reacting this way to his touch.

“Don't matter none how long I'll have to wait,” Daryl began, his eyes set on her and his words purposeful. “It'd be worth it.”

Beth felt the warmth spread inside of her as she looked him in the eyes. She wondered briefly if he knew what he was saying, if he knew what his words sounded like to her. It felt as if he was telling her a thousand things at once and they all resulted in the same thing: her heart hammering wildly in her chest as she tried not to add any extra meaning to what he was saying. Maybe it had all been an innocent comment and he hadn't really thought it through before speaking? But no, she knew that it wasn't, because she _knew_ Daryl now too and if one didn't count the things he hid from her, he had never said anything that he hadn't meant to say.

He knew what he was saying and she was trying to decipher him because she knew that there was more to it. The way he was looking at her told her that he hadn't been holding back like he usually would and she knew that it was probably the most sincere thing that he would ever tell her. It made her feel things inside that she had never thought she would feel, but then again, she had always felt something for Daryl, hadn't she?

After Rick had told her that they'd been alone, she had wondered if Daryl might have had feelings for her, but maybe, she too had had feelings for him? Perhaps that was why she had felt an immediate draw to him?

She looked at him now, her hands feeling clammy all of the sudden and her heart still beating in her chest strongly. He was still gripping her wrist and she was sure that he could feel her pulse there, but she didn't mind. A part of her wanted him to know what he did to her, what he made her feel.

There was nothing to say because as usual, the only thing it took was a look and he understood. They didn't need words because their bond was growing stronger by the day and she was grateful for that.

So she smiled at him, as brightly as she could, wordlessly telling him that she was glad that she had him with her through everything and that he too would be worth waiting for. His lips twitched and for the first time, she wasn't surprised to see them turn up as he offered her the best half-smile he could muster.

For her, it was enough.

* * *

He hadn't hesitated when he had said it and he didn't regret saying it either.

Daryl continued to walk by Beth's side, his crossbow hung around his shoulders, their walk quiet because no more words needed to be said. He had wanted to tell her, if only to clarify, that what he meant was that _she_ would be the one worth waiting for, but he knew that she understood him without him having to explain it to her.

She understood him better than most, even though she didn't remember anything from their past. She didn't know that she had been the first person he had told what he had been doing before the Outbreak, or rather what he _didn't_ do. There had never been any judgment in her eyes when she had listened and afterward, she had merely told him that she wished that she too could change, like he had.

Now she had and she didn't even know how much or how little.

But he still saw her. Not only the girl she had been, but also the woman that she had become. Her growth had begun while they had been living in the prison together, but it wasn't just until they burned down the moonshine shack that he realized that she was no longer a little girl... Or maybe he had seen it before that too, but he hadn't wanted to admit it to himself? He still recalled that time when he hadn't been able to sleep, but her voice as she sung Judith to sleep had calmed him and given him some sense of inner peace. Even back then he had known that there was something special about the girl, but he had forbidden himself to think about her in any other way than just another person that he needed to protect from the horrors of the world. Then, they had been alone and all the things he might have begun feeling way back in the prison, the things that he had been suppressing for so damn long, just began bubbling up.

But not at first though.

No. He had _hated_ her. Hated himself and the world and the Governor and everything that had to do with his miserable life that he somehow got to keep, while others who deserved to live, lost theirs. He had been so angry with everything that had happened that he had refused to talk to her and instead, he had wallowed in his own misery for as long as he could, while still keeping an eye on the girl because she had become _his_ responsibility. If anything, he had figured that he owed Hershel as much as to take care of his daughter since he hadn't been able to do anything to save the old man's life.

That was what Beth had been at first: a debt he had wanted to settle.

And then things changed between them. He heard her crying over Peach Schnapps and the family he kept insisting was dead and he just _knew_ that she, out of everyone, deserved _better_. So he took some risks and found her moonshine to drink, because at least that was something that he _could_ help with. They had gotten drunk and he was an outright dick when he was lit and finally, his walls had broken down in front of the girl.

The shift happened mere seconds after that. He _saw_ her for the first time in a new light when they sat there on the porch together, and he told her about the nobody he had been and the life he wished he could get away from. When she had looked at him and told him that he had done just that, gotten away, there had been something in her eyes that simply made him believe her. He believed every single word she said to him that night and that was when the _stirrings_ turned into flutters.

As they had watched the shack burn to the ground, flipping off their past, the emotions inside of him had still been there and he wasn't sure that they ever went away. At the funeral home, when he had watched her play the piano and sing softly, the flutters had transformed into something much bigger that shook him to his core. Never in his life would he have ever thought that he would be able to feel such a thing for someone, much less for such a young woman like Beth. Never in his life would he ever have believed that he could deserve to even get to know someone like her. Yet, even before the little private concert that had lulled him to sleep for the first time in days, when they had stopped to place flowers on that grave, pretending that it was Hershel's... When she had laced their fingers together, he had squeezed back, offering her more comfort than he had ever offered anyone ever before.

_ That _ had been the moment he had known that he was screwed, even though he might not have wanted to admit it to himself.

She was there though;  _inside of him_ . In his head, in his bloodstream, in his heart.  He would never be able to get rid of the feelings that he had tried so hard to keep from coming out and he had decided, after almost losing her again, that he would allow himself to at least feel them from a distance from now. If Beth ever hinted that she might feel the same for him as he did for her, he didn't know for sure what he would do, but he figured that he would take things one day at a time. That meant that he needed to be honest with her on some things, such as what he had just told her before. He knew that they had been growing closer and closer the last week, but there was also something about Beth that seemed a little different. At times, Daryl felt as if she was holding something back from him, though he couldn't pin-point exactly what it was. A part of him wanted to ask her about it, but he knew that whenever she was ready, she would come to him and talk about it, and just as he had told her: it would be worth waiting for.

* * *

After her walk with Daryl, Beth decided to seek out Morgan. The two of them had talked while she had been recovering, but it had always been brief for various reasons. She knew that he had been worried sick about her because he didn't want to lose her, just as she would have been for him if his life had ever been danger.

There had been times after she had dug herself out of her grave, after she had found out that the dead had risen and begun walking, tearing the living to shreds, that Beth had wondered if it would have been better for her to have just died. The few weeks in the beginning, before she had gotten to know Morgan, she had felt so lost and so alone and she just hadn't been sure that he would let her stick around with him purely because she had been so down. It was horrible, not knowing who you were or what your name was. Beth had been close to losing her mind once because she had tried to push herself to remember, but failed time and time and again. She had had nights when she had cried herself to sleep, silently because her damaged vocal cords wouldn't actually allow her to make any kind of noise and then she had had nights when she had wondered if the people who had buried her were still out there somewhere, mourning her. 

Naturally, her relationship with Morgan had changed since then and she had grown to love the man so much that she didn't think she would ever be able to live without having him in her life somehow. It wasn't that she was dependent of him, but rather that she considered him her family now and she didn't think that family should ever be left behind.

Her chest ached when she thought of the pain her other family must have felt when they had thought that they had lost her. She couldn't imagine the hurt they must have gone through and she didn't even know the circumstances of her supposed death yet.

Beth wasn't sure that she even wanted to know.

“Hey, lil' Lady,” Morgan said, throwing some firewood into a basket. “Your walk go okay?”

Beth nodded wordlessly, watching him as he went back to piling the wood into the basket, probably so that he could bring it inside to the pan in the basement.

“What brings you here?” Morgan asked after another moment of silence. “I figured you'd be thrilled to be able to walk around normally again. Not planning on going on a hunt or something with Daryl are ya?”

“Not yet,” Beth sighed, shifting a little from one foot to the other. “I guess I just need to talk to you about something... I found something out and now I don't know what to do with it.”

Morgan paused, placing the last piece of wood in the basket before turning back to her slowly. He wiped his hands on a rag that he had brought with him and then wiped away some sweat that had formed on his forehead. “You wanna take another walk or is here good for ya?”

“Here's good,” Beth nodded, sitting down on the bench that they had in the backyard. Morgan sat down in front of her and clasped his hands together over the table.

“Everything alright?” he wondered, sounding a little worried. “You're not in pain or anything, are you?”

“No, it's not about my injuries,” Beth said quickly, not wanting to get into that again since it seemed to be the only thing people asked her about lately. “It's Daryl.”

She could feel her cheeks heating up at the mere mention of the other man, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from Morgan. This was new territory for them and she didn't know if she was crossing a line, talking about this with him. She needed to talk about it though because she was going crazy, thinking about all the different scenarios that might occur if she approached Daryl about the two of them. Beth knew that Morgan had talked to Daryl once, maybe even twice, so she figured that he might be able to shed some light on the situation and give her advice. Up until today, his words of wisdom had always helped her when it came to making big decisions and she wholeheartedly hoped that they would do so again.

Morgan unclasped his hands and rubbed his palm against the small beard that had grown on his chin. He closed his eyes and sighed deeply before looking back at her again. “Has something happened between the two of you?”

Beth opened her mouth to reply, but closed it quickly, not really knowing what to say. Nothing  _had_ happened, but she kind of felt like she wanted something to happen. “No, Morgan. No,” she shook her head. “Nothing's happened.” She hesitated, “Would it be bad if it did?”

Morgan squinted his eyes and raised an eyebrow at her. “You're a grown woman, Beth,” he told her. “You can make your own choices and I would stand by you no matter what you picked...  Unless it's something that would make you risk your life.” Beth smiled at that and looked down at her hands that were resting in her lap. “So what did you find out then?” Morgan asked.

“I knew that he was keeping something from me,” Beth explained. “From the moment I talked to him, I just _knew_ that there was more to the whole thing than what he was letting on.”

“More to what thing?”

“ _Us_ ,” Beth clarified. “More to _us_ , me and Daryl.” She swallowed, looking up at Morgan again. “Rick let it slip that Daryl and I were alone for a while. The place we lived in was overrun and he and I got separated from everyone else. Everyone got separated...” she trailed off, trying desperately to remember more of that time, but she couldn't. The veil that always seemed to cloud her memories was still there, up like a wall to mock her for the things that she would probably never know. “We were alone and he never told me.”

“And now you don't know whether you should confront him about it or not,” Morgan finished for her, almost effortlessly.

Beth watched him before narrowing her eyes. “Why don't you sound surprised by all of this?” she asked, her voice coming out a little demanding, but Morgan remained impassive.

“Daryl may or may not have mentioned something about it once,” Morgan shrugged. “It was a good while ago.”

“You _knew?_ ” Beth gaped. “You knew and you never said anythin'?”

Morgan reached over and took her hand in his, forcing her to look him in the eyes. “Beth,” he said, a small smile playing on his lips. “We both know that it was better that you found out on your own, even though Rick was the one who told you. Daryl seems like the kind of man who wouldn't open up about such a thing too easily.”

“Then why would he tell you?” Beth asked, squeezing his hand. “I've asked him so many times, Morgan. I've given him so many chances to tell me, and he hasn't. Why?”

“I think that is a question that only Daryl can answer,” Morgan said.

Beth began tapping her foot against the ground, feeling her nerves tingle.  She wanted to know but she didn't want to scare him away. Maybe, if she let things progress naturally between the two of them, he would one day bring it up himself and admit it to her? Perhaps they would one day be close enough that he would tell her and she would listen and then tell him that it was okay and that she wasn't mad at him for keeping it from her. Maybe one day, she would understand.

“Thank you, Morgan,” Beth breathed out, brushing away strands of her hair that had fallen into her face.

“So what are you gonna do, Kid?” he asked her, making her roll her eyes.

“Didn't you just tell me I'm a grown woman? Now you're calling me a kid again,” she pointed out.

Morgan huffed out a laugh and stood up, circling the bench before bending down to press a light kiss to the top of her head.

“No matter how grown up you are, I'll always see you as a kid...” he trailed, sounding a little hesitant then.

“I'll always be _your_ kid,” Beth smiled at him. “I may have had a father once, Morgan, but that doesn't mean that I can't have another father. It doesn't mean that you can't be a father for me too.”

At her words, Morgan's worry seemed to ease away and he leaned down again, pressing another kiss to her hair. She reached around him and hugged him, smiling as she relaxed against him.

“Why did my life become so complicated suddenly?” she mused, resting her head against his chest when he sat down next to her.

“Never thought I would have to have a boy-talk with someone...” Morgan smirked.

Beth elbowed  him, letting out a small giggle. “Daryl's a man,” she corrected, “and it isn't like that.”

“Mhm,” he hummed, clearly not sounding convinced. “Well, he's a _good_ man.”

“He's not interested in me like that,” Beth said, knowing that her blush was only deepening.

“None of my business anyway,” Morgan shrugged. “Whatever it is that's going on...or _isn't_ going on. I'm just saying that if there was, I would support you if it was your choice to pursue it. Life's short and the two of you obviously care about each other,” Morgan said. “I'm not going to say anything else on the matter because I don't want to make the decision for you.”

Beth stayed quiet, thinking about what Morgan had said. She knew that she had choices to make but she still didn't know what the best way to approach Daryl would be.

It wasn't until a bit later that she decided to just stick to her original plan. She would let things between them become whatever they became and let things go naturally. The last thing she needed was pressure on herself and she didn't want to pressure him either. They were in a good place right now and she didn't want to ruin it by making him uncomfortable. The best thing to do for now, was to not do anything at all.

* * *

Daryl grumbled as he brushed past Michonne in the hallway. The woman gave him a knowing look that he was trying his best to pretend that he wasn't seeing. He walked toward the end of the hallways where his and Beth's rooms were, stopping outside of Beth's before knocking lightly.

Beth had retired to her room a little earlier than normal, telling the rest of them that she had been having a headache all day long. From the months they had been on the farm together, Daryl and everyone else knew that she still got them sometimes as a remnant of being shot in the head so they didn't ask her anything about it. Still, it worried Daryl and the moment Beth's eyes had connected with his as she had gotten up from the dinner table, he had decided that he would be checking in on her before he went to bed himself.

He heard her call out that it was okay for him to come in and he opened the door, slipping inside and closing the door behind him without looking at Michonne, who he knew was still watching him. Beth was laying in her bed, hair loose around her shoulders, resting on her side. Her eyes remained focused on a small hole in her blanket that she was playing with and he took a small step closer to her bed.

“Ya feelin' better?” he asked her, his voice gruff. Beth's eyes moved over to him and he almost held his breath at the look she was giving him.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” she asked then, completely ignoring his question. Daryl felt his mouth open, but his words were lost as his grip on his crossbow tightened a little. “I've been havin' nightmares again and the last time we slept in the same room, I didn't have any.”

Her pale cheeks were turning pink and he forced himself to meet those big blue eyes that always managed to leave him breathless.

Yet, he found himself replying, “I'll bring my shit over.”

“ _No!_ ” Beth said, making him stop. “I mean... You can lay down here... With me.” He looked over at her again and watched, almost mesmerized as her cheeks darkened even more. If anything, he was certain that his own cheeks were turning red too.

He swallowed and nodded a few times, ever so slowly walking toward the bed–  _her_ bed. His hand moved up and he bit into his thumb, brushing the pad of it against his lips as he watched her for another moment, that felt like hours. She was looking up at him with that same look that she had been giving him the whole week; the look that told him that she had questions to ask but didn't know how to ask them.

“Move over,” he instructed, lowering his crossbow to the floor before shrugging off his vest. “I can stay 'til ya fall asleep.”

“I don't mind you sleeping with me,” Beth told him. She shut her eyes tightly. “Damn. There must have been a better way to say that...”

Her little slip should have made him uncomfortable, but her own reaction to it made his lips twitch and a sound similar to a low chuckle escape his lips instead.

“Whatever ya want,” he found himself saying. His response made her smile back at him and he once again wondered, just how many boundaries he was crossing with her at the moment.

How many boundaries _they_ were crossing _together_.

He sat down first, toeing his boots off, not wanting to get  her sheets dirty. At first he had intended to lay down on top of the covers, but Beth seemed to have another idea entirely when she moved to the side and lifted the cover for him to slip under. He eyed her briefly, searching her face for any kind of hesitation or second thoughts, but when he found nothing that indicated that she would regret her decision to invite him into her bed, he slipped under the covers, letting her cover him with it as he rested his head against the pillow that smelled so much like her.

He was tense, his hands resting on his sides, arms pressed tightly to his body, not knowing what to do with them. A thousand thoughts were running through his mind but he couldn't actually put any of them into words that he could understand. Somewhere in the back of his head, he could hear Merle cackling at him  and he couldn't really blame his long dead brother for it, despite knowing that it was his imagination.

He felt suffocated all of the sudden. It felt as if the walls around him were closing in and his skin was on fire. He wanted to stay and he wanted to go and he just didn't  _know_ what he wanted anymore.

“ _Daryl?_ ”

And that was that.

All it had taken was her whispering his name in a hesitant question. He turned toward her and met her eyes, his lips pressed tightly together as he stared at her. She was looking so worried, as if she wanted to know if she had pushed things too far and the hesitancy he could see there now made him feel sick. He didn't want to make her feel bad and he hated that she clearly couldn't relax because he was so on edge. Her small hand moved to his then and closed around it, her thumb brushing against the rough skin of his palm a moment before he closed his hand, grasping hers tightly.

Allowing himself to relax, finally, he realized that this was what Beth wanted. She  _wanted_ to have him there. He hadn't forced his way into her bed, but he had been invited. If she wanted him to leave, she would tell him and he would get out of there as fast as he could and never talk about it ever again.

But Beth didn't say anything.

Instead, after he had taken her hand in his, she had moved closer, moving his arm so that it rested around her shoulders as her head came to rest between his shoulder and his chest, close to the place where his heart was beating wildly inside of him.

When she exhaled, he could almost hear the smile on her lips and he found himself relaxing even more. She still held on to the hand that was now resting on her elbow, his arm wrapped around her, holding her close. Daryl didn't know for sure what it was that had prompted her to make such a bold move, but when the tension in his body slowly ebbed away, he decided that he didn't really mind all that much.

* * *

Beth felt warm all over.

With Daryl's arm wrapped around her, their fingers intertwined, her cold feet brushing against his warm ones, she had never felt more at home. She didn't know how much time had passed since she had gotten Daryl to lay down next to her, but she knew that everyone else in the house was probably already asleep. It was dark outside and her open window was letting the cold wind fill the room with fresh air, but she was still warm.

_Daryl_ made her warm, she realized. Her stomach seemed to be making somersaults and her heart was hammering away. Whatever it was that was going on between them, Beth was just now starting to admit to herself that she _wanted_ something to be going on.

Since she had found out that they had been alone, she had never longed to ask Daryl about it as much as she did in that moment. She knew that he wasn't asleep because his thumb kept brushing against her skin in slow, controlled movements, soothing her absentmindedly. But she couldn't just ask him now. There was no doubt in her mind that Daryl would just get up and leave the room without actually saying anything to her. Instead of saying anything, she found herself nuzzling a little closer to him, turning her head into the crook of his neck. She inhaled, breathing in the scent of him that she had gotten accustomed to by now. He smelled of cigarette smoke, some sweat and the forest and it was something she just loved about him because for some reason, it made her calm.

“Tell me another story,” she whispered, her eyes fluttering shut briefly. “Tell me another story about the girl you knew, the girl you cared about.”

Daryl's thumb stopped moving then, but his body didn't tense like it had when he had first laid down in her bed. “Why ya wanna know so much 'bout that girl?” he asked, his voice equally quiet.

“I feel like I know her,” Beth said slowly, not knowing how else to explain it. “I just...I wanna know more about you and whenever you tell me about her...” she let the rest hang unspoken.

Silence filled her bedroom again but Beth waited patiently. Eventually, Daryl began stroking his thumb against her skin again, making her insides flare up as well.

“She deserved better than me,” he told her, his voice still silent, but sure. “She deserved a hell of a lot better than me.” Beth stayed quiet, not knowing what to say, which was good because Daryl clearly wasn't finished. There was a hint of bitterness and self-loathing in his tone when he spoke next, “I was old and damaged back then too. Scarred from a fucked up past that I never wanted no one to know 'bout... Told her 'bout it though. Now I'm still fucked up, old and damaged and she's–” Daryl cut himself off abruptly and made a sound that sounded like a forced intake of breath.

Beth tightened her grip on his hand and lifted herself up, looking down at him. He began turning his head away so that he wouldn't have to look at her, but she put her hand on his cheek and turned it back so that he was facing her again. His lips were still pressed into a hard line, eyes narrowed and icy, but she knew it wasn't directed at her. He was angry with everything else, not her.

“Daryl,” she said, biting her lip, shaking her head a little. Her heart ached for him; for the way he seemed to doubt himself and hate himself but even more for the way he saw himself. She wished that he could see himself through her eyes instead because for her, he was the most amazing man she had ever met... Her memory loss didn't matter anything to her when it came to that because she was certain that she had never met a man more enticing than Daryl Dixon.

She didn't know for sure why he was keeping things from her, but she had suspected that it was because something might have happened between them in the past. Now, she was a little older and she was a new person entirely and she knew that what had been in the past didn't matter here, right now. All she knew was what she was feeling in this particular moment and she wanted him to see that too. He wasn't the only one who was fucked up.

“We all have scars,” she told him, still cupping his cheek, making him meet her eyes before brushing her thumb against the skin there. “We all have stories.”

He surprised her then by moving his other hand up to her cheek, hovering over the scar she had there. Beth could see that he was hesitating once again, so she tilted her head, closing her eyes as her cheek finally came into contact with his rough hand. Her move seemed to be the only sign he needed to know that it was okay for him to touch her there. His thumb brushed against the scar she had there on her cheek. After a few brushes, he moved his hand away and she opened her mouth to protest, but stopped short when she felt his finger brushing against the scar on her forehead instead. Her eyes opened slowly and she knew she was blushing when she was met full force by the intensity of his eyes boring into hers. His hand moved again, this time down. Two of his fingers rested under her chin and he slowly tilted her head up. She moved with him allowing him to see the scar she knew was there; the scar that had come from the gunshot that had made him and everyone else believe that she was dead. His finger touched it gently before sliding down the column of her throat, his hand coming to rest on the side of her neck. A warmth spread from the place where their skin was touching and Beth just couldn't take her eyes away from him.

They stayed like that, just staring at each other. Seconds, minutes maybe even hours passed and then Beth found herself moving impossibly closer to him, leaning down. His hand was still there, his thumb still brushing against the scar under her chin but Beth couldn't stop herself. The pull was magnetic and electrifying. He was setting her on fire and she found herself wanting to know if she would actually end up bursting into flames if she kissed him. Her eyes began fluttering closed as she moved closer, but before she could close the remaining gap between them, Daryl's hand moved again. This time, it ended up on her shoulder and her eyes shot up just in time to see him lean away from her. His move was so abrupt that it made her stop her advance, flushed and breathing just a little bit heavier. She was startled because she had thought that...

_ Oh God, what had she been thinking? _

Daryl was staring at her, his eyes wide for only a moment before his eyebrows knitted together into a frown instead. His hand was still on her shoulder, but he didn't move to stand or to run out of the room. His other arm was still wrapped around her and she realized then that she was half laying on top of him, pretty much making it impossible for him to move away even if he wanted to.

She moved back a little and laid back down next to him, not daring to look at him just then. He didn't say anything and neither did she, but she wanted to so badly that it didn't take more than another moment for her to do so. If he had wanted to run, she figured he would have done so. Or at least, he would have let go of her hand that was still very much tangled with his.

“You were there, weren't you?” she asked him. Finally, she looked up at him again. “When I was shot, I mean. You were there, right?”

Beth felt like she had known it for a while, but the way he had touched that particular scar, which such tenderness, despite his eyes being hard, as if he was remembering just how she had gotten it had confirmed it for her.

Barely noticeably, Daryl nodded.

After that, they both seemed to relax again. It was out there now, at least some of it and it made Beth feel a little lighter again.

“The girl you cared about,” Beth said when she was once again settled with her head in the space between his shoulder and his chest.

“What 'bout her?” Daryl asked, his chest rumbling beneath her.

“She would have been the luckiest girl in the world to have you,” she told him, glancing up at him again. He was looking down at her with something else now, but Beth knew better than to push her luck too much. Although, what was this life without taking some small risks?

She leaned up quickly and pressed her lips to his cheek, lingering for a moment before pulling away. Meeting his eyes, she offered him a small smile before laying back down again, her hand coming to rest over his heart. She allowed herself to pretend that the kiss she had just placed on his cheek was the reason that his heart seemed to be beating just a little faster than it usually did. The arm that he had wrapped around her tightened just briefly and his hand moved up and down her arm then before his fingers began playing with the ends of her blonde strands. Beth smiled to herself, nuzzling closer to him, her legs tangling with his as she once again took a deep breath, knowing that her nightmares wouldn't plague her tonight.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooh, tension, tension, tension and a cheek kiss! And yes, they did sleep in the same bed together too! The next chapter is definitely one of my favorites though and then everything pretty much goes to hell in chapter 22. But for chapter 21 I have three little spoiling words: Tattoos, tension and touching.
> 
> Why don't you think about it for a moment and then tell me what you thought about this chapter. It might just inspire me to write the next chapter faster so that you'll get another update on Monday?
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and supporting me! I would be nothing without you guys! xx


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth makes a request and Daryl gives her more than she bargained for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much you guys! The response to the last chapter was amazing and I am so, so sorry for not updating on Monday like I originally said I would. There was one particular scene that I couldn't figure out how to write and it forced me to sort of do some research which took a while. Either way, I hope this chapter makes up for the wait since it's extra long (over 10k long!) and has some moments...
> 
> The story is rated M for a reason btw, and even though there's nothing explicit going on yet (and I'm still not sure how explicit the smut will be when we get there) there is a reason for it and I figured I'd warn you before you started reading this chapter... ;)
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 21

_Daryl was laying on his back, as he usually did when he slept nowadays. His crossbow was on the floor next to his bed, simply because no matter how safe they had been on the farm this past month, he was always prepared for things to go wrong. He wouldn't let himself be caught off guard again, especially not after what happened to Noah. Losing someone else wasn't an option for him and he knew that if he was to protect the rest of his group, his_ family _, he needed to get some rest. Otherwise, he wouldn't be as alert as he should be if an attack of some sort ever occurred._

_Yet, he couldn't sleep._

_One particular face kept showing up in his mind, her bright blue eyes and glowing blonde hair ever a constant in his thoughts. No matter how hard he tried he never seemed to be able to get Beth out of his head. What had she been thinking when she had pressed her lips against his cheek? Why had he felt the urge to just move an inch to the left to connect their lips and just kiss her senseless?_

_He knew why. It was because he had feelings for her. Feelings that ran deeper than he had ever thought they would. They were emotions that he didn't dare name because knew that if he admitted them to himself, there would be going back for him. Beth would become the one person in the world that he cared about the most and he would always put her before everyone else, even himself._

_He didn't know who he was trying to fool though because if anything, those feelings he had for her were very much real and there already was no way to return from the depth of them that he felt for her._

_So deep in thought, he failed to notice his bedroom door opening and he didn't realize it until he glanced up to see Beth pressed against his door, looking down at him from where he laid on his bed. He pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at her, his concern shining through._

“ _What happened? Everythin' okay?” he asked her._

_She worried her lower lip between her teeth and nodded curtly. “I can't wait anymore, Daryl,” she told him then. He frowned at her, confusion washing over him as Beth moved her hand to the lock on the door, turning it with a soft_ click _before looking at him again from under her long lashes._

“ _What are ya doin', Beth?” he rasped out when she began moving closer, her hands slipping down to the hem of her shirt. She played with the material for a moment before ever so slowly lifting it up and away from her body, letting it drop to the floor in front of her._

_Daryl swallowed hard, looking away from her as soon as he realized that she wasn't wearing anything under the shirt and shut his eyes tightly._

“ _I don't want to wait anymore,” Beth said again and he could hear her moving closer to him. “I want you, Daryl. Please, just– Just look at me.”_

_He had never heard her voice like that. It seemed to be filled with both longing and desperation and he didn't even know how to begin making something out of it. His fingers were itching to just reach out for her and take her, pull her toward him, but he_ couldn't _. Her quiet plea did, however, make him turn toward her again and he forced himself to keep his eyes trained solely on her face._

_Beth moved even closer to him and he realized that he was fully sitting up on the bed only when she sat down on it, moving over him to straddle his lap, pushing him down until he was laying down again. His hands moved of their own accord it seemed, to her hips and his fingers came in contact with her bare skin. He glanced down in surprise, only to see that she had gotten out of her pants as well. She was sporting a pair of flimsy, light pink, cotton panties and she was straddling him, pressing him down, pinning him with her intense look._

“ _I want you, Daryl,” she repeated, her hand moving up to cup his cheek, brushing over the stubble that had grown and roughened the skin there. He swallowed thickly when her hand fell down to his shoulder before moving to his chest again, where she slowly began unbuttoning his shirt._

_He couldn't believe this was happening and he remained still, except for his blunt fingernails digging into the soft skin of her hips. Beth closed her eyes, her mouth falling open a little at the pressure she seemed to be enjoying and one of the smallest of moans escaped her lips. She moved above him in a small rocking motion and he could feel himself straining against the zipper of his pants._

Fuck _. He wanted her._

_Throwing caution to the wind, he moved his hands, grasping her thighs instead. Beth let out a small gasp and pressed down against him just a little bit harder when his fingers began tracing patterns on her inner thighs, trailing upward, fingers brushing against her panties before tracing back down to her knees. He repeated the movements a few times before he pushed himself back up until their chests were pressed together; he could feel the soft swells of her breasts against him, her hardened nipples brushing against the coarse hair that littered his chest. Beth's hands pushed his shirt down his shoulders and he removed his hands from her thighs only to shrug it off. It fell forgotten to the floor where Beth's own shirt and pants lay. Then, Beth's fingers were in his hair as she pulled him forward, their lips colliding in an almost desperate kiss that made his mind go completely blank. He cupped her cheeks, his thumbs brushing against her cheekbones. When he felt the rough skin that was her scar, he moved his other hand to tangle in her golden locks while the other remained where it was, showing her that her scars didn't matter to him; that she was still and always would be the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on in this fucked up world._

“ _Beth,” he breathed against her lips, his eyes closed as her nimble fingers reached down to unbutton his pants. “Ya sure ya wanna–?” She didn't let him finish because she ground her hips downwards again and he swallowed down his own moan when the pressure began to become too much. His hands trailed downward, toward her chest, but before he could reach her breasts, he changed his mind and pushed her back a little. Beth made a sound of protest but before she could say anything he flipped them over, using his hands to prop himself up above her and just hover. His lips brushed against hers again, this time softer and Beth wrapped her legs around his hips, pulling him in closer._

“ _God, Daryl... You have no idea how long I've wanted this,” she whispered into his ear. He looked at her, taking in her flushed cheeks and swollen lips._

_He opened his mouth, wanting to tell her that he too had longed for this moment, perhaps without even knowing it even, but nothing came out of it. Frowning, he tried to speak again, but only a hoarse rasp could be heard._

_Then, someone knocked on the door._

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock_ .

The three raps were loud and Daryl's eyes flew open as he sat up in his bed. For a moment, he was so confused about his surroundings that he looked around – looked for  _Beth_ – but couldn't see her anywhere. It took him another few seconds to realize that it had just been another one of his dreams and he silently cursed himself because of it and the fact that he was painfully hard.

This had been happening all week long, ever since he had slept in Beth's bed and woken up all tangled up in her. Apparently, it hadn't been enough that she had actually turned his world around by kissing him on the cheek, but it also seemed like his mind had decided to take that little innocent moment they had shared to turn it into  _very_ vivid dreams that always ended with him waking up embarrassed and ashamed of himself for the erection pressing against his zipper as if he was some kind of pubescent boy who couldn't control himself better.

O f course, when it came to Beth, he realized that he hadn't been very good at keeping his emotions at bay at all. He had told himself that it was fine, that she only saw him as a friend and that friends sometimes kissed each other on the cheek. Then again, she hadn't done it again since that night, but she did show affection in other ways. Whenever she would greet him in the morning, she would brush her fingers against his upper arm and smile at him. At times, he felt her leaning against him, always moving a little closer than should be acceptable for two friends, but he tried to convince himself that this was the way things just  _were_ between them now. They trusted each other and they depended on each other. It was only natural for her to seek comfort in him by staying close and for her to give him comfort by touching him whenever she met up with him.  It wasn't her fault that she didn't know the dirty thoughts that kept running through his mind whenever he felt her near him.

_Knock, knock_ .

Daryl sighed, running his fingers through his hair before glaring down at his lap where the evidence of his highly inappropriate dreams about the beautiful blonde. He shook his head at himself and forced himself to stand, adjusting himself the best he could before walking over to the door. Opening it just a little, he peeked out, only to be met by the sight of Maggie with her arms crossed over her chest.

“What?” he bit out.

Maggie quirked her eyebrow at him and smirked, “G'mornin' to you too.”

Daryl glanced down, feeling embarrassed over the fact that he was letting his... _reaction_ to the dream he had had about Maggie's younger sister effect his mood this much. “Mornin'...” he mumbled. “Ya need me for anythin'?”

“I was just checkin' in on you,” Maggie shrugged. “It's past nine in the mornin' and well, you've never woken up this late before.”

He eyed her and snorted, feeling like they had gone back months, to when they were still on the road. Back then, after his breakdown in that little bar, when he had yelled at Rick, angry at the world for taking Beth away, Maggie had tried to approach him several times. She would always check on him, even if he didn't give her any replies.

“So?” he asked. “Was just tired, s'all...”

“Beth was worried you might be sick,” Maggie told him, her lips tugging upward as she uncrossed her arms. “You wanna tell me what that's all 'bout?” Daryl shook his head, but for some reason it only made Maggie smile. He still hadn't opened the door fully, but he could feel his previous excitement die down a bit, his pants finally not feeling suffocating. “Okay then,” Maggie nodded, still smiling. That was the only time he saw similarities between the Greene sisters: when they smiled. “Carol saved you some breakfast downstairs. Beth's gone on a walk with Carl and Judy.”

“They alone?” Daryl frowned, feeling tension set in his shoulders again.

“They'll be okay, Daryl,” Maggie said calmly. “Beth is always carryin' 'round her knives and Carl has his gun. They aren't going far and they aren't outside the wall.”

“Mhm...” Daryl hummed, already planning on skipping breakfast to go and find them.

“She's the one who asked to take care of Judith today,” Maggie explained. “It was nice seeing her doing it again. Reminded me a bit of how things were back then.”

Daryl once again didn't say anything, but he did allow the door to fall open a little more. He was feeling calmer again and he was sure that Maggie wouldn't be able to pick up on any since of his previously aroused state.

“It's kind of ridiculous, really,” Maggie shook her head. “Beth has changed so much that it's strange thinking of how she was back then. She's different, _stronger_.”

“She was always strong,” Daryl said. “Ya'll just never saw it.”

“But you did,” Maggie pointed out. “I know you did,” she added before he could open his mouth to deny it. Then again, why would he deny it? It was true, after all. He looked at Maggie, not really knowing what she was trying to tell him or what he was supposed to say to her. She just looked at him and smiled softly again. “Get some breakfast, Daryl,” she told him. “Beth will come back to you.”

Without letting him say anything else, she turned on her heel and walked away. He watched her as she went and looked down at his feet. Maggie's words and the smugness in her tone ran through his head as well as the dream he had had about Beth earlier.

“Fuck,” he swore under his breath, rubbing his hand over his face, shaking his head at himself. He needed to get a fucking grip already.

* * *

Beth bounced Judith on her hip, watching in delight as the little girl squealed with joy. Carl was walking beside her as they slowly made their way back toward the house after having taken Judith on a shot walk around the perimeter, both checking the wall for any breaches and allowing the toddler some fresh air a little bit further from the house.

“Is it just me or does it look like she's gotten bigger since you guys got here?” Beth asked Carl.

He looked over at her and smiled lightly, “Yeah. I think the point of babies is that they're supposed to grow... It's been like six months or something, hasn't it?”

“Feels like years,” Beth commented. “In a good way,” she added quickly. “How are you holding up?”

She didn't have to clarify because they both knew what she was talking about. Just the fact that she had recovered from the injury she had obtained at the hardware store was enough to know that some time had passed since their mutual friend had been killed. Beth knew that she herself still felt waves of sadness crashing through her, but she hadn't really taken time to talk to Carl much considering how weak she had been while she had been recovering. Sure, he had come and checked in on her quite a few times, but it wasn't as if they would have wanted to talk about how she had almost died right after they had lost someone in their family.

“I'm okay,” Carl shrugged. “Guess I just thought that we would be okay now... After finding the farm and you... I thought everything would be good. Then we lost Noah.”

There was defeat in his tone and Beth hated how tired Carl sounded.

“I'm tired of losing people,” she confided in him. “Even though I might not remember much from before, I know I would never want to feel such pain again. I might not remember how everyone except Maggie died in my family, but I feel like I lost them when I lost my memories... I still grieve them.”

“I understand,” Carl said and Beth just knew that he did. The young man – because that's what he was now after being hardened by the end of the world – got a hardened look on his face, which didn't soften until Judith gurgled happily and extended her hands toward him. “I miss everyone we lost since this whole thing started... I miss my mom.”

“Carl,” Beth turned toward him. “It's understandable to miss the people we lost. You're mom must have been a wonderful person and I wish I remembered more of her. Both you and Judith deserved to have her here to watch you grow up. Your dad deserved better too.”

“I think she cheated on my dad,” Carl sneered then, sounding a little colder. “I was so pissed at her when I realized–” He cut himself off and shook his head. “I know that she thought my dad was dead and that she was alone...but she had _me_.”

Beth tried to process the new information. She looked at Judith then and wondered briefly if it was possible that Rick wasn't even the little girl's real father. When she saw the familiar intensity of Rick's eyes in the baby, she knew that she shouldn't start doubting who Judith belonged to. Besides, it didn't matter. Rick was the girl's father, no matter who it was that had helped conceive her, Beth was sure.

“I hate that she died like she did,” Carl continued as they walked. “I wish I could have told her how sorry I was for ignoring her all those months when we were on the road.”

“We can't go back in time and change things, Carl,” Beth told him softly. “No matter what your mom did, she had her reasons to and I'm sure that she didn't just fall out of love with your dad because she thought he was dead either. You were younger and there are probably things we'll never understand. But you shouldn't doubt that she knew that you were sorry and that she loved you very much.”

They walked slowly and Carl turned to glance at her. “You always knew the best things to say,” Carl said. “Glad that's still the same about you.”

Beth let out a small laugh. “Am I really that different?” she wondered.

“A little,” Carl shrugged. “Don't matter though, 'cause you're awesome as fu–”

“ _Carl_ ,” Beth laughed, shaking her head at him before he could finish swearing. “I promised Michonne I wouldn't let you swear in front of Judy now that she's picking up on words at random.”

Carl let out a chuckle and shook his head. “She's so good with her,” he said, clearly referring to Michonne. “And she's good for my dad too, I think.”

Beth smiled at that but once again decided not to comment. It was good to know that Carl seemed to have accepted that something was going on between Rick and Michonne. Both adults had had their own challenges to deal with since the dead started walking and Beth was glad that after everything, they had found each other. She understood that one sometimes needed the comfort of another and she herself had found that comfort in Daryl, no matter what he felt or didn't feel about her.

She thought back to the way she had moved toward him that night when he had agreed to sleep next to her. Never, since she had met him, had she felt such a strong urge to kiss the man than in that moment. Neither of them had spoken about it and she had noticed that Daryl acted a little strangely from time to time, which made her doubt herself a little. Then, he would get that special look in his eyes that washed away all the uncertainty she felt.

There was still so much that she wanted to learn about him though and she was still didn't know for sure why he had lied to her about the two of them being alone. Daryl may look like a simple man, but Beth had learned the hard way that there was absolutely _nothing_ simple about him or the way her feelings for him had grown these past few months. What had started out as a simple acknowledgment of his attractiveness had turned into a small crush and then – _now_ – into something much deeper that she didn't even know what to call.

She didn't know whether she should be excited about finding out, or if she should be scared.

* * *

“G'mornin' sleepin' beauty,” Abraham snorted as Daryl approached him. “Your girl was up 'fore the sun was up properly an' you were bein' lazy, stayin' in bed.”

“Ain't like that ya stupid fucker,” Daryl said, shaking his head. It was probably the thousandth time he tried telling Abraham that Beth wasn't his girl, but the other man seemed to enjoy teasing him too much to actually listen.

“Do I even wanna know?” Abraham snorted, raising an eyebrow at him. “What you up an' about this mornin' anyway? Ya going huntin'?”

“Nah,” Daryl shook his head. “Me an' Beth are prob'ly gonna head out in a few days though...” he trailed off when he saw Abraham grinning and suppressed the urge to just roll his eyes. He certainly couldn't ask if Abraham had seen Beth and Carl anywhere now. “Was just comin' out to take a smoke,” he lied, reaching into his pocket to grab a cigarette out of one of the almost completely crumpled packages.

“Ya feel like sharin' today at least?” Abraham wondered.

“Ya don't really smoke,” Daryl frowned, but offered him a cigarette anyway. It was the least he could do after Abraham had basically saved Beth's life.

“I do when I've had a crappy night,” Abraham told him, waiting for Daryl to light the smoke. It took a moment to get the lighter to work and Daryl swore a couple of times under his breath before both cigarettes were finally lit.

“Won't Rosita get mad at ya for smokin'?” Daryl asked then. “She never liked it when I did it while we were on the road. Somethin' 'bout cancer bein' somethin' we shouldn't have to worry 'bout getting' from passive smokin'.”

“Think it's the smell that bothers her more,” Abraham shrugged. “I'll just take an extra long shower tonight...preferably with her helpin' me wash the smell away,” he added, grinning.

Daryl elbowed him in the side and snorted as he leaned against the wall of the house. “I don't wanna hear 'bout you an' Rosita. 'Specially not if you're gonna use the shower that I use too.”

“We'll stick to the one on our floor,” Abraham winked. A moment of silence passed between them before the other man spoke again and by then Daryl had already smoked half his cigarette. “How's Blondie?” Daryl gave him a side-glance which caused him to chuckle. “In terms of recovery,” Abraham clarified, but there was still something suggestive in the look he was giving Daryl.

“She's good,” Daryl told him, deciding to ignore the fact that he had basically screwed up again when it came to interpreting Abraham's questions.

“Good to hear that,” Abraham nodded curtly. “She's a spitfire though, isn't she? Knows how to pack a punch.”

“Don't look at me,” Daryl told him. “Ya deserved it when it happened.”

“Glad that we're all on good terms again,” Abraham snorted. “Wouldn't want to have lil' Beth Greene punching my lights out again any time soon. Though she ain't so lil' no more, is she?”

The teasing tone was back.

“Ya didn't know her 'fore she got shot,” Daryl reminded his friend. “Had to grow up fast. She prob'ly stopped bein' a kid the moment we had to escape her daddy's farm.”

Abraham nodded again. “I was just messin' with ya,” he said. “I can tell that Beth's hell of a lot more mature than most women her age.”

Daryl wanted to say something to confirm that it was true, but his attention turned to Beth, Carl and Judith who had just walked into the garden. Beth took Judith from Carl and then turned toward Daryl and Abraham, smiling softly at them both, before her eyes settled on Daryl. She lifted one of Judith's chubby arms and made the little girl wave in his direction. The action made Daryl feel all warm and he raised his hand, resisting the urge to wave back. Instead, he just held it up to acknowledge that he was seeing the gesture.

Beth seemed to take it as a sign that it was okay for her to come toward them though and she walked over with Judith still in her hands and Carl in a tow.

“Hello, gentlemen,” she grinned teasingly.

“Ain't nothin' gentlemanly 'bout Dixon here,” Abraham snorted. “Unless there's something you know that I don't, Blondie?”

Beth cheeks darkened a little, but her smile remained. She didn't comment on it though as she turned her attention to Daryl instead, their eyes meeting as she took a small step toward him. Almost instantly, Daryl reached out to touch her elbow after stubbing out his cigarette on the fence, as his other hand came to rest on baby Judith who began squirming in Beth's hands as she reached for Daryl. He looked down at the child momentarily before looking at Beth again and suddenly that warmth returned inside of him as his mind was flooded with images of a little girl that he had once dreamed about.

It was so easy to imagine a future with Beth that it almost made him uneasy. He would never admit that it scared him though, but he supposed that if he was being honest with himself, it did. Every single time his mind was filled with images from that particular dream he had had a few months back, he couldn't help the longing that he felt in his chest.

The night that he had slept in Beth's room had been one of the few nights that he hadn't dreamed a single thing. Before that, when they had been laying in bed, just talking, he had told her another story about the girl she didn't know was actually her. He had been drowning in everything that was Beth Greene, that he almost didn't realize that she had moved closer to him while he had been looking at her scars. At the realization, he had been startled and pushed her back, before he realized what she had actually been about to do. That had then caused him to panic a little because there was no fucking way that Beth would just take the leap and kiss him like that.

But the look in her eyes when she had pulled back... There had been a flicker of disappointment in them and he had regretted pushing her away instantly. He wasn't sure what he would have done if she really had kissed him though. Since her pressing her lips to his cheek had caused his brain to have a meltdown it seemed – if the dreams he was having were any indication – he didn't know what would have happened if she had actually taken that step and he hadn't stopped her.

“Hey, lil' Asskicker,” Daryl grinned as Judith reached for his beard. He glanced at Beth again. “Hi.”

“Hi,” she smiled back at him, her tone coming out just a little breathless. Her wide grin made her look even more beautiful, he thought, knowing that he would never dare to actually tell her that.

“Abe,” Carl said suddenly, reminding Daryl that he and Beth weren't alone with Judith. He looked over at the young man who had addressed Abraham. “Beth and I saw Dad and Morgan down by the barn. They were looking to fix some hole in the roof that we missed and they asked me to see if you were free.”

“Mhm...” Abraham hummed, giving Daryl a knowing look before turning to Carl. “Let's go then, Kid,” he said, ruffling Carl's hair.

Carl pushed his hand away but smirked anyway before looking over at Beth. “You gonna be okay with Judy?” he asked her.

“Yeah,” Beth nodded, shifting the little girl in her hands again. “I'll be fine. If I need help, I can always get Carol or Tyreese since Michonne isn't here.”

“She, Tara and Rosita should be back in a few hours,” Abraham pointed out. “Just a quick pharmacy run.” He turned back to Carl. “Come on. Don't wanna keep ya dad waitin'.”

The two of them walked away, leaving Daryl alone with Beth and Judith who opened her mouth in a small yawn.

“She's tired,” Daryl acknowledged, brushing his thumb across Judith's soft cheek. “Ya wore her out on your lil' walk.”

“She needed the fresh air,” Beth said, taking a small, barely noticeable step closer to him. He did notice though, and his grip on her elbow tightened just a little.

“If she falls asleep, she'll be out for a while,” he said.

“Mhm...” Beth hummed, bouncing Judith a little again as the baby leaned her head against her shoulder, eyes fluttering shut. “She's a sweetheart though. Don't really know why I was so scared to hold her before. Now I can't seem to get enough of her.”

“You're good with her,” Daryl told her softly.

“It feels natural takin' care of her,” Beth admitted. “Did I do that before? Take care of Judith?”

She was looking at him so expectantly then that Daryl just couldn't find it in himself to lie to her. On the other hand, it might be something that he didn't have to lie about. Nowadays he questioned his previous choices a thousand times every day, wondering if he had made the right decision to keep the fact that he had begun feeling something deeper for her while the two of them had been alone. This was something that he could admit, just like he had admitted the night that they had slept in the same bed that he had been there when she had been shot.

“Yeah,” he finally said. “Ya took care of her. Stepped up after Lori...”

Beth contemplated his words for a moment before nodding. “It makes more sense now, I guess. Thank you for answering.”

He almost shrugged and told her that it was nothing, but by the look she was giving him, he understood that him sharing small parts of her past with her meant a great deal to her.

“Ya should get her inside,” he cleared his throat after a moment. He knew he had been staring at Beth for far too long when his heart started beating just a little bit faster. His hands felt sweaty and wanted nothing more than to take a cold shower as the memories of the dream he had had most recently returned once again. As if sensing that something was going on, Beth bumped his side lightly with her hip, making sure not to move Judith too much.

“You okay?” she asked him, big blue eyes blinking up at him.

“Yeah, yeah,” he swallowed.

“I was worried you might've caught a bug or something since you didn't wake up before everyone else,” she told him. “You look a little feverish though.”

Daryl let his hand fall from her elbow and took a small step back. “'M fine. Really,” he told her. “Needed to catch up on some sleep, I s'pose.”

Beth bit her lip, looking a little hesitant all of the sudden. “You know, you could always come to my room again... If you wanna, I mean. Or maybe I could...” She trailed off, shaking her head. “Never mind. I have to get Judith inside.”

“Hey,” he reached out, stopping her before she could step away. Conflict brewed inside of him as he yet again questioned whether he was making the right choices with her. “If you're havin' nightmares or somethin', you can come to my room tonight... If ya wanna talk, or somethin'...”

“Somethin'?” Beth asked, quirking an eyebrow at him. He was pretty sure that there was actually a glint of mischief in them, but it disappeared as soon as it had appeared.

“Sleep,” he clarified, feeling his face heat up.

Beth watched him for another moment before a smile spread on her lips again. “I'd like that. _Very_ much,” she said. He found himself nodding, wondering just how idiotic he looked right not before letting go of her. She shot him another brilliant smile before she walked off and into the house, glancing back only once before heading inside.

Daryl grumbled at himself, reaching into his pocked for another cigarette, lighting it. As he took a deep drag of it, he tried hard to ignore his brother's voice in his mind which was telling him that he was as whipped as they come.

* * *

Daryl felt like a moron.

An absolute and total idiot.

He looked around his small room that he had just spent the past ten minutes cleaning before realizing what he was doing. The room hadn't even been that messy to begin with since he liked to keep his things in order and close by in case of the need for an emergency exit. Still, he had picked up some of his discarded clothes and shoved them into the small dresser so that they wouldn't be laying around on the floor when Beth came to see him.

_If_ she even came to see him.

After she had put Judith to bed, she had started acting distant again or maybe it was just he who had decided to avoid her for a little while? Either way, he had gone off to help with the barn and Beth had spent the rest of the day with Maggie, Sasha and Carol inside. They hadn't seen each other again until dinner and by then Daryl had gotten past the slight embarrassment he had felt at inviting her into his bed for the night. Their eyes had met a few times as they had eaten and Beth's had always glistened with something secretive that made his insides tingle. He wasn't sure if she even knew what she was doing to him, though he didn't exactly want to admit to her what kind of effect she was having on him.

The main problem, however, was that Daryl had quickly realized that he was cleaning his room for nothing. Beth wouldn't give a shit if he had a dirty shirt on the floor or not and she most certainly wouldn't care if he had forgotten to wipe some dust away from the dresser. She had been in his room a few times by now and she had actually already spent a night in his bed. Of course, he had slept on the floor that one time, but if he managed to survive sleeping in her bed with her, he was sure he could do the same thing in his own. Unless Beth didn't intend on them sharing a bed again?

He shook his head. It was pretty clear that that was  _exactly_ what Beth  had meant when she had first suggested he come to her room ans sleep there. He wasn't just imagining things, but he wasn't entirely sure what he should or shouldn't be doing.

That morning, when he had woken up with his nose buried in her hair, his arms around her petite frame, their fingers intertwined, resting over her stomach... He had never felt more at peace than he had in that moment. Then, Beth had moved a little and her movements had suddenly made him realize the pressure that had built up in his groin, which was snugly pressed to her  backside. Forcing himself t stay calm and not panic, he had slowly moved out of the bed, making sure not to wake her. Then, he had left, looking back only once to see her turn around and press her face against the pillow that he had been resting on.

He didn't know what would happen tonight but he knew that he couldn't allow himself react to her the way he had been doing every day since that morning. Sitting on the bed, he took off his boots before burying his face in his hands, frustration settling over him. He started to think of ways he could keep things as platonic as possible between the two of them but didn't get very far in his thoughts before a knock came from the door. Daryl stood up a little too quickly and moved forward, stubbing his toe as he hurried over to the door.

“Fuckin' shit,” he swore, opening the door as he rubbed his toe against the floor to try and sooth the stinging. He looked up and saw Beth looking at him with an amused expression on her face. “What?” he ground out, shooting a glare at her which only made her shake her head at him as her smile widened.

“Everythin' okay with you?” she asked, stepping inside the room. He closed the door after her and watched as she walked over to his bed, sitting down as if it was the most normal thing for her to do. She didn't seem nervous at all, which only made him feel like something was crawling inside of him. Then again, why was he nervous? It wasn't as if something would be happening between the two of them.

“Stubbed my fuckin' toe,” he muttered, feeling his face heat up.

Beth blinked at him a couple of times before smiling again. “I'm not going to comment on how you, the group's best hunter, managed to stub your toe in your own bedroom when you're supposed to know about minding your surroundings.”

“Ya just did though,” he pointed out, resisting the urge to smirk at her playful tone. “Comment, I mean.”

“I did, didn't I?” Beth grinned at him. She glanced around the room then, clicking the pen she was holding in her hand. The sound drew Daryl's eyes to the things she had brought with her: a pen, a sharpie and a journal. “Do you mind if I write a little?” she asked him. “You can lay down if you want. I'll make room for you.”

He raised his eyebrow at her and huffed when she moved to the side a little, but he moved toward the bed either way and sat on the edge. “Ya don't exactly take up too much space,” he snorted, the hairs on his arm raising as he became aware of just how small his bed was when he laid down. Beth lifted her legs a little and then leaned back against the wall before bending her knees so that she could rest her journal against them. His legs rested in the space that she had made, underneath her and he threw an arm up behind his head so that he could look at her as she began scribbling things down into her journal. Daryl wondered what she was writing about, though he knew that whatever it was, she would share if she felt like it.

She wrote for about half an hour and he watched her silently, nibbling on the pad of his thumb, not sure what he should be doing instead. Beth glanced up at him a couple of times but only offered him a curt smile before focusing back on the notebook in her hands.

“You wanna know what I've always wanted?” she asked him then, finally wrapping her book up, dropping it on the floor next to the bed along with the pen she had been using. She twirled the sharpie around in her hands, taking off the cap and then putting it on again.

He lifted himself up a little then, to get a better look at her as she looked over at him again. “What?” he wondered.

“Actually, I don't know if I've always wanted it, but I do know that I've wanted it since I woke up again and could think more clearly,” she explained. “Morgan and I were passing through a small town and I saw this tattoo shop.”

Daryl raised his eyebrow at her. “Ya want a tattoo?” he asked, surprised by the revelation.

Beth's eyes dropped to his arm where he had a devil tattooed on his upper right arm. Unconsciously, he lifted his arm a little and glanced down at the inked demon. “Yeah,” Beth breathed out. “But it's a little too late now, isn't it? No professional tattooists around anymore.” He watched her silently, suddenly feeling as if his chest was on fire. The ink he had there seemed to be burning him now. Beth moved a little closer then, her knees on the bed as she moved toward him. Daryl swallowed thickly, but made some room for her to sit next to him. “Can I see your tattoos?” she asked him then. “I've always been curious about them and I don't think anyone else has as many as you do... They all mean somethin', right?”

“Ain't ever had someone look at them all,” was the only reply Daryl could get out as he met Beth's eyes. A blush dusted across her cheeks as she looked down.

“I didn't mean to push,” she told him. “I just... I don't know...” she shrugged, looking away.

Daryl didn't know if it was the disappointment that had covered her face or if it was the need he suddenly felt to just allow her to see the darkest parts of his soul, but he got out of the bed just a minute later. He could feel Beth's eyes boring into his back, but he couldn't bring himself to look at her just then. It always made him uncomfortable when people got too close to him and out of everyone he had met since the world went to shit, Beth was certainly the one person who had gotten under his skin the most. Perhaps that was why he decided to do what he did next.

Daryl slowly shrugged off his vest, throwing it  carelessly on  the chair in the corner before he started unbuttoning the shirt he was wearing. He couldn't look at her and he hung his face down so that his face would be covered by his hair because he didn't want her to see the emotions he knew he wouldn't be able to hide from her once he finally showed her. She had asked to see his tattoos, but she would be getting so much more. He was willing to show her just how fucked up he was and he didn't know how she would react to it all.

His skin felt too tight as he finally let his shirt drop to the floor, his back still turned toward her. Closing his eyes tightly, he waited to hear her gasp or  _something_ but it never came. Instead, he heard her moving off the bed and he forced himself to take a breath because he didn't know what else to do. She seemed to be radiating heat off of her body as she stepped closer to him and he readied himself for whatever that was to come. He knew that she was neither stupid nor blind; that she could see the scars marring his back and that she could probably make a guess as to how they marks had gotten there. All too aware of her, he knew when she moved and he braced himself, inhaling sharply.

What he hadn't expected though, was for her to touch the tattoo on his shoulder instead of the  rough scars on his back. Letting out a breath, he felt Beth's cold finger tracing the lines of the tattoo carefully, as if she was trying not to scare him away. Curiosity got the better of him and he pushed down the uneasiness he had previously felt, turning his head to the side so that he could look at her over his shoulder.

It was in that moment that he realized how different she was from everyone else.

She saw his skin, his scars and all the imperfections that were there; the things that had haunted him and made him shy away from everyone else, that had made him refuse letting anyone get too close. Her eyes moved over his back, her mouth set in a firm line as her eyes narrowed slightly before she looked up and met his gaze.

There was no pity there, but the pure hatred that seemed to cover her face almost made him shudder. It wasn't directed at him though. No, it was directed at the people who had hurt him, and the world that had wronged him since the day he had been born, forcing him to go through things that no one should ever have to.

He didn't need her to say anything because he could read it all so clearly in her eyes and it made him relax when he realized that she wasn't judging him or his past. Without thinking twice about it, he turned around to face her fully. Her eyes moved down to his chest as she took a small step forward, almost as if she was seeking out the closeness they had had a  mere moment ago. Her hand moved up and she traced the name he had tattooed on his chest, not asking about it because she knew that it was better not to. Her other hand reached up to grip his bicep, where the devil that she had been looking at before was tattooed, but then her attention turned to the small letter, just underneath his collarbone, above the name that was inked over his heart. She reached up and brushed the pad of her finger over it, frowning slightly.

“This one is different,” she whispered. “It's darker than the others. Not as smooth.” She met his eyes then, waiting for him to tell her something. He had been dreading this exact moment because he knew that it would take everything to lie to her about that particular small tattoo that no one knew about... Well, almost no one.

“I did it a couple of month 'fore we found Morgan,” he told her, his voice hoarse. He forced himself to swallow down the breath that seemed to be caught in his throat and keep looking into her eyes.

“You did it _yourself_?” she gasped, mouth falling open as she traced the letter again. “How?”

“Were passin' through a town,” he told her quietly. “Found some ink, some needles... Drew it quickly an' then just went to work, I guess...”

“You tattooed yourself... What about infection? Weren't you scared you'd get infected?” she wondered, blue eyes staring up into his.

“Didn't care,” he said, knowing he had to make a quick exit out of the conversation before he admitted something she wasn't ready to hear. “Didn't have time to finish it though,” he lied.

“What was it supposed to be then?” Beth continued to touch the tattoo.

“Was s'posed to be a part of a bigger tattoo. Saw some notes an' wanted to get them tattooed,” he told her, the lie feeling bitter in his mouth.

“Musical notes?” Beth frowned, her hand resting on his chest then. She stopped tracing the lowercase _b_ that he had marked himself with. “Is this a _flat_?”

“I guess,” he shrugged then, deciding to just go with it. He didn't know the first thing about playing music, but he knew that his kindergarten teacher had mentioned some chords once when he had been a kid and that a 'flat' was something she had tried to explain to him and the other kids in the class.

“You were risking infection to tattoo random musical notes on your chest?” Beth said in disbelief. Then, some kind of understanding seemed to wash over her. “It was for her, wasn't it? The girl you loved? The one you lost?”

Daryl tensed again, staring down at the young blonde. He had always been careful when it came to referring to the girl he had known – the girl who was in fact  _Beth_ – and he couldn't remember if he had ever actually admitted that he had  _loved_ her. Beth's use of the word that Daryl had never dared to make himself familiar with had caused something to stir inside of him again. His heart was beating strongly and he knew that Beth could feel it because her hand was still resting over it, over the tattoo that he had gotten so that he would never forget  _her_ .

He nodded slowly, trying to make out what she was thinking about, but he couldn't read her at all. There seemed to be too many thoughts running through her mind and he was trying not to acknowledge that he hadn't denied that he had loved Beth.  Because right then, in that moment, he realized that he had.

He had loved her.

In fact, he still did.

He watched her as her eyes dropped down, settling on his mouth, it seemed. The reality of the situation and the similarities to the night that she had moved toward him crashed down on him. He watched her as she opened her mouth, as if to say something but he couldn't, just  _couldn't_ bring himself to face her right then. Instead he took a step back and instantly, Beth froze up and whatever she had been about to say got caught in her throat. He picked up his shirt and threw it on the chair before moving to grab another shirt to wear, pulling it on quickly over his head before he turned around to face Beth again. She was looking at him, mouth set once again and deep in thought.

“We should go to bed,” he told her. “If ya wanna?” he added, feeling the need to make sure that she wasn't too upset with him for pulling away. He knew that he should probably make her leave the room and go to sleep in her own bed, but he knew that he was far too selfish to actually do so. The night that they had spent together had been one of the few nights that he had slept well and he wasn't going to throw her out if she was still willing to sleep next to him. He couldn't push her away again, despite having needed to put some distance between them when he had realized what the feelings he had for her were.

He had never been in love before so he would never know for sure, but he knew that this was something so deep, something so  _new,_ that it just had to be it. The way she made him feel couldn't compare to any of the things he had felt before. He had had his share of women that he'd fucked, but he had never been a ladies man either. It had always been simple one-night-stands that were fueled by alcohol and low inhibitions and even back then, the occasions had been rare because he thought life was simpler when one didn't get attached to someone else. Besides, they always left in the end. Well, either they did or he did.

“Of course,” Beth said, forcing him back to the present. He looked at her, unsure of what else to say or do. She, as always, sensed his uncertainty and took a small step toward him, offering him her hand. It hung between them for just a few seconds before he reached over and took it. She squeezed his in return and pulled him with her as she walked backwards toward the bed. He watched her intently as she pulled her hoodie over her head, revealing a simple black t-shirt underneath it before getting into the bed, pulling the covers back. He lowered himself into the bed and laid down next to her, facing her as she moved a little closer to him.

“If we found some ink and some needles,” she began, a small smile on her lips as she relaxed against him, “would you be willing to tattoo something on me?”

He looked down at her, at her pink lips that seemed to be taunting him, making him lean into her a little. “Nah,” he shook his head. “Wouldn't wanna risk you getting' an infection,” he decided to say, his own tone a little teasing.

Beth giggled, shaking her head as she turned to lay down on her back, staring up at the ceiling. Daryl watched her profile for a moment before sitting back up again, reaching for the sharpie that had clattered to the floor when Beth had pulled the covers back. Beth watched him as he removed the cap and moved toward her shoulder, the tip of the pen hovering there.

“If ya asked me though, I'm not sure I could deny ya,” he admitted then, his voice low as he watched her and waited for her reaction. “I ain't very good at drawing, so you'd have to come up with somethin'.”

Beth smiled at him. “What can you draw?” she wondered, glancing down at her shoulder. Daryl looked down at her pale skin and without thinking, pressed the tip of the sharpie to her skin. He looked up at her again and saw her biting her lip but then he returned to his work, carefully drawing the one thing he was sure he couldn't fail at. When he pulled the sharpie away he put the cap back on and then proceeded to blow a little on the mark, making sure that it was dry before he touched it with his fingertips, making sure that it wouldn't just rub off on the sheets while they slept. Beth looked down at it and then grinned up at him, touching the arrow he had drawn on her. It started at her collarbone and ended where her shoulder began, the head pointing toward her heart.

“I love it,” she told him. “Thank you.”

H e watched her move toward him and didn't  tense up when he felt her lips press against his cheek again, just a little bit closer to his mouth than the first time she had done the same thing. She laid back down and he wrapped his arms around her, once again deciding that he didn't want to think about how addicted he was becoming to having her close to him.

Beth closed her eyes and let out a shuddered breath which only made him pull her closer to him, sharing the heat from his body with her. Her lips ghosted against his neck as she wrapped her own arms around him, hands sprawling over his back, right over his scars. This time, when she touched him, he didn't do anything as she began tracing the ridges with her fingertips over his shirt. He just looked at her and they stared at each other for another moment before he allowed himself to just let her do whatever the hell she wanted to him. She had seen him already, seen the marks his past had left on him and she hadn't been disgusted by him. In fact, she had seemed to only understand him better and it was almost as if it had made her want to be closer to him.

Her legs tangled with his and her fingertips never stopped moving, but her eyes fluttered closed again and he buried his nose in her hair again, inhaling lightly before he began to drift to sleep, not entirely sure what he should do about the fact that he had fallen so deeply in love with Beth Greene, that he didn't know how he would ever be able to live without her.

* * *

Beth opened her eyes slowly, adjusting to the light that was flooding in through the window. She was warm,  _ really  _ warm and she quickly realized that the reason was that she had spent the entire night wrapped up in Daryl's arms. She was still facing him, her arms around him, but it seemed like he had rested his head against her chest some time during the night. His rough cheek was resting right over her heart and Beth didn't dare to move, not wanting to wake him up just yet.

She was enjoying having him this close and she didn't want it to end when he woke up. Last night, he had shown her not only his tattoos at her request, but also his own scars that he had been keeping hidden. Never before had he looked as vulnerable as he had in that moment and something inside of Beth had just broken at the sight of him. She didn't want to tell him that she was sorry for him. It had pained her to see what someone had put him through and she had been filled with such a rage that she had felt like lashing out on whoever it was that had caused him such hurt. She had held it all in though, not wanting to frighten him with the ferocity she felt when it came to protecting him.

When he had turned to look at her, she had wanted nothing more than to just reach up on her tip-toes and press her lips against his. That particular urge seemed to only get stronger with each and every moment she spent with him alone.

Moving her hand just a little, she realized that she had it underneath his shirt, touching one of the bigger scars on his back. She didn't pull away though, not daring to in case he decided to wake up just then. He was blowing out small puffs of air against her skin and it only made her feel warmer. When she began moving her fingers against his skin, she felt his grip on her tighten a little and it wasn't until then that she realized that his own hand had ended up under her shirt, splayed on her stomach. She swallowed, looking down at him as his breathing patterns changed a little, indicating that he was waking up. She didn't move, only stared at him as his eyes fluttered open. It seemed to take him a moment to realize where he was and who he was resting his head on, but when he did, he looked up at her, his face incredibly close to hers.

When he frowned, glancing down at his hand which was still resting on her bare skin, he began moving away but Beth reacted before he could, grabbing his hand, keeping it in place as she stared at him. Her thumb moved over his hand and she frowned then, feeling something rough there too, similar to what she had felt on his back. Slowly, she lifted his hand and looked at the skin she was touching, only to see a round scar.

“Daryl?” she asked, hoping that his name would suffic e to express her question.

He seemed to hesitate momentarily. “Did it to myself.” His answer had been whispered so low that she had barely even heard him. It had been more close to a mumble than anything else really, but she  _ knew him _ now, and she understood what he was saying.

“Why?” she wondered, equally as quiet.

“I had lost her an' I didn't feel anythin'... Wanted to feel somethin',” he told her, his head resting on her shoulder. She wondered if he was completely awake yet or if he was admitting all of this to her in his half-sleepy daze.

“You hurt yourself,” Beth whispered, touching the mark again, her grip on his hand tightening a little. “I hurt myself too one time. I have the scar on my wrist, but I don't remember how or why or  _ when _ ... I just know that I must have been desperate for something... Maybe to feel something.”

He lifted his head then and looked at her. She wasn't judging him for having hurt himself and on some level, she was sure her past self would have understood him better. All the times she had wondered about the scar on her wrist, she had never really understood what it was that had pushed her to do that to herself but she hadn't been sure that she had wanted to know either. Now though, she thought she might understand just a little bit better, because something inside of her moved when Daryl had explained the lack of emotions he had felt after losing the girl he had loved.

She wondered what she would have done if she ever lost him.

Catching her thoughts she stopped herself before they traveled into a too dangerous territory.  How could she compare Daryl losing the woman he loved to her losing Daryl? Did she – Did she love him?

S he blinked up at Daryl as he lowered his head and pressed his lips to her forehead lightly before pulling back again. Never taking her eyes off of his, she pulled his hand up and pressed her lips to his burn mark.

“What we did doesn't mean that we're weak,” she told him then. “We were just lost and we wanted to feel something and we did, afterward, didn't we?” She watched him as he nodded slowly. Letting go of his hand, she placed it over her heart and then moved her own to brush away his hair from his eyes so that she could meet them. “I feel...” she hesitated, biting her lower lip as his intense eyes bore down into hers. “I feel when I'm with you,” she finally told him, deciding that the two of them didn't need more lies than the ones he had fed her for months. He had shown her himself last night and now she wanted him to see her. She understood that it might take him a while to get over the woman he had lost, but she hoped that somewhere down the road, he might actually grow to feel whatever it was that she felt for him now.

He lowered his head again, this time to press a kiss over the scar on her cheek. “I feel when I'm with you,” he repeated, his voice rough and low and just plain  _ raw _ . Beth tightened the grip she had around him and nuzzled her face into his neck then, closing her eyes, breathing him in as they relaxed back. She didn't know for sure what it was that they had just admitted to each other but she knew that whatever it was that Daryl was making her feel, it wouldn't be going away any time soon.

For now though, they laid together on the bed, legs still tangled, her hot breath against his neck and his arms wrapped tightly around her and Beth felt that she had never felt more at home than she did then.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! A lot of things happened in this chapter, didn't they? At least in terms of Daryl and Beth growing closer. They're just so hot-and-cold with each other, aren't they? It's getting frustrating to write too, but the push and pull is important for when they finally just collide.
> 
> Either way, I would very much like to know what you thought of the chapter in general and which part of it that was your favorite! The last scene, where Beth wakes up with Daryl... It wasn't planned to be in this chapter, but I just needed to write it. Oh, and what did you think about that first dream that Daryl had? ;) 
> 
> Now, regarding the next chapter: I'm probably going to need some time to write it because shit is seriously going to hit the fan. I know that a lot of you will probably guess what's gonna happen so I'm just going to say that the chapter will be a little different too. It'll be a little more "jumpy", going back and forth in time, which is why I need the time to make sure that it's all fitting together well. Until then though, don't forget to leave a comment! It's very much appreciated and it motivates me to know that people are actually enjoying this story! :)
> 
> I think Blink will have about 27 chapters in total, so there aren't that many left, but there's still a long way to go! I love all of you and thank you so much for all the support I've gotten so far. You're all wonderful! xx


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things go to hell when half the group is gone on a run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! :) Okay, so I really wasn't planning on updating tonight, but since I finished the chapter up, I decided that ''why the hell not?". So, as I promised, shit's hitting the fan in this one, but it will also be resolved here. There's a time jump after the first part which will be pretty obvious and hopefully, it'll make sense when you get back to where it all started.
> 
> Okay, it's late and I sure as hell am NOT making any sense, but I really hope that you'll get it when you read it! The next chapter will probably be a little shorter than this one, but it's just as important. Won't be able to write anything until Friday though, but I hope you'll like this chapter enough to comment and give me motivation! :)
> 
> Enjoy!  
> P.S. If there are any mistakes with spelling and such things, I'm sorry. I haven't had time to proof-read it all and those little fuckers weave themselves in there when I'm not looking... :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 22

Beth felt the stinging on her cheek and did her best not to wince at the burning feeling. She could feel a drop of blood making it's way down her chin from the corner of her lip and the metallic taste in her mouth confirmed that she was indeed bleeding. Her ears were ringing but she could only focus on two things: Morgan that was laying unconscious, his blood covering the back of his head and Daryl, who was laying on the ground, bruises already forming on his face, blood running slowly from his nose.

She bowed her head as her hearing slowly came back and she let out a small gasp of air that she had been holding. Dirt-covered boots appeared in front of her and she felt the man's hand grasp hair as he forced her head back so that she would look him in the eyes. The pain she felt on her scalp due to the rough treatment was nothing compared to the panic she felt inside as her eyes once again flickered over to the rest of her group. Wiggling her hands a little, she tried to loosen her binds, but the zip-ties were too strong for her, especially after her previous struggles.

Finally, she felt another tug and the cool metal of a knife settling at the base of her throat and she was forced to look up at their attacker's face. Her blue eyes met his cold gray ones and she decided to once again not give in, sending him the best glare she could muster as she tried not to think about the two men who meant the most to her in this world being just a couple of meters away from her, beaten and bloody on the ground.

She blinked a few times, trying to focus her glare on the man responsible for their treatment as she wondered just how fast everything could have gone to hell like it had.

* * *

_36 hours earlier..._

Beth turned slowly, moving closer to the warmth that she had gotten used to feeling every morning for the past few days. She was no longer confused whenever she felt Daryl's fingers touching hers early in the morning, seeking her out even in his sleep and she did what she had been doing ever since they began sneaking in to each others rooms late at night, intertwining their fingers. Every time Daryl would wake from his sleep though, he would still look hesitant, as if trying to figure out whether it was actually a dream or something that he was having, but she would always reassure him with a simple smile that she was okay with _this,_ with them sharing a bed and giving each other comfort.

She looked at him now as his eyes slowly opened, always sensing when she was awake and watching him. His hand moved up, releasing her hand before it came to rest on her cheek as he brushed away her hair that had fallen there, half-covering her face from his view. She smiled at him again and nuzzled a little closer, burying her cold nose in the crook of his neck.

“G'mornin',” he mumbled as his arms tightened around her.

She loved the pressure and sighed against him, “Good morning, Daryl.”

“S'still early,” he pointed out. “Can sleep a lil' longer if ya want.”

Beth closed her eyes and inhaled through her nose, filling it with the scent of him. “I wanna get up so I can wave Maggie and the others off before they leave,” she told him.

He hummed in agreement, but neither of them made a move to step out of the bed yet Though, Beth could feel the pressure building in her bladder too and she hated that she would need to get up soon anyway to relieve herself.

“Should prob'ly get up,” Daryl said then, closing his eyes as he let out a small groan at his choice of words. Beth snickered, but didn't say anything as she shot him a look, her eyes trailing downwards before moving back to meet his again. He blinked at her a few times and Beth's stomach fluttered at the sight of a light blush creeping up his face. She reached up and touched his cheek, to assure him that she didn't want him to feel embarrassed for such a small slip, especially considering how many times she found herself slipping up when she was near him.

“Yeah, you're gonna want to give Rick a big hug before he leaves,” Beth teased, finally moving to sit up. She looked down at him where he lay on his back, looking at her in the way that he had been ever since they started sharing a bed every night.

“Ya know he won't leave without one,” Daryl smirked, but remained laying down on the bed as he once again closed his eyes. He always seemed a lot more relaxed in the mornings after they got themselves a good night of sleep. They would stay up sometimes before they fell asleep though. Beth would whisper all the things she and Morgan went through while they were alone and he would tell her a story or two from his past, from before the Outbreak. It seemed though, that he did everything to avoid talking about the prison they had lived in and what exactly it was that had happened when Beth had been assumed to have been killed. She knew that he had been there when she had been shot, but she still didn't know the details of the event. Either way, she didn't want to pressure him, no matter how badly she wanted to know just what it was that might have happened between the two of them when they had been alone. She was convinced now that something had been going on at least, otherwise she saw no sense in the way that Daryl was acting toward her now. She had become addicted to having him around and it seemed like he too didn't want to be separated from her for too long. It was one thing if they had different jobs to do on the farm, but whenever they had dinner or meetings, the two of them stayed close together and it seemed like no one questioned it.

She looked down at him again and leaned down, pressing her lips to his cheek, like she did every morning before getting up. Walking across his small room, she grabbed her hoodie and put it on, zipping it up. Before she could turn around and tell him that she would be seeing him down at breakfast though, she felt his strong arms envelop her from behind as his head came to rest on her shoulder. Her heartbeat picked up a little and she moved her hands up so that they touched his, smiling as he seemed to pull her just a little bit closer. It was rare and it only happened when he was absolutely sure that the two of them were alone and safe, but Daryl seemed to have taken to hugging her lightly from time to time too. She loved feeling his arms around her but she loved it even more when he was the one who initiated physical contact between them. It told her that there was indeed something going on – something _changing –_ between them, even if neither one of them had addressed it yet. She told herself that they didn't _need_ to talk about it because they were fine with whatever it was. It didn't matter, as long as they both had each other and Beth was content with that, for now.

* * *

Daryl felt like the biggest sap in the history of saps. It was like he was a fucking addict or something and being close to Beth was his drug. Waking up next to for several days in a row, legs always tangled and bodies always pressed tightly together was probably one of the best things that had ever happened to him in his entire life. He was thankful for the fact that his dirty dreams about the young woman had lessened, so his 'morning issues' weren't a very big problem now... The few times that he hadn't been able to control that particular problem, Beth had been gracious enough to not point it out if she had noticed, but he didn't know _how_ she wouldn't have been able to notice though, considering just how much it seemed that his dick was enjoying to be close to her as well.

He cleared his mind, not wanting to think about it again because it made him feel like he was somehow taking advantage despite Beth having silently assured him that she actually _wanted_ to share a bed with him. Besides, they hadn't exactly done anything other than lay together, talk and then sleep while holding on to each other. Although it didn't change the fact that Daryl's urge to kiss Beth kept growing with each and every night that passed.

Waking up next to her was doing things to him and it wasn't just physically. He had already accepted the fact that he loved her – that _he_ had actually somewhere along the way fallen in love with _Beth Greene_ – but it was so much more than that. Whenever he would meet her eyes in the morning, she would give him one of her special smiles that seemed to radiate happiness and he would find himself with _the_ words on the tip of his tongue.

Every single morning he almost told her the truth. That he had lied to her in the beginning and that there _had_ been something between them, or that there had been something on his part at least. He still wasn't sure what Beth had felt for him back then, if she had even felt anything, but he felt that she deserved to know the truth either way. If she still wanted to share a bed with him then, if she still wanted to be with him in whatever way they were now, she would at least have all the information and not just some made-up thing he had told her about the two of them never being close. It would be her choice to make and he would respect it, no matter what it would be.

The problem was that he couldn't see her actually choosing to forgive him. He could only see the big fight she had had with Maggie when she had found out that her sister had lied to her, or kept things from her which she felt that she had deserved to know. Beth had asked Daryl several times over if they had been friends at least, but he had denied her the truth every time. He couldn't see the woman Beth had become forgiving him for lying to her and he knew that whenever the truth came out, it would ruin everything that they had built up until today. Their friendship would disappear and she would push Daryl away and he would just accept it, but hate himself for the fact that he made her hate him too. _That_ was something he wasn't sure he could deal with: Beth hating him.

So today, when she had gotten up from his bed, he had watched her zip up that hoodie of hers and he hadn't been able to help himself, because the fear of losing her had just been too great and he had needed to touch her at least one more time. He had gotten up and hugged her from behind, just like she had done that time outside of the moonshine shack. She had held him together back then and even though he was the one who hugged her, she was still the one who was keeping him in one piece. He wanted to tell her the truth, but he _couldn't_ because he was still a selfish fucker who couldn't bear losing her. So he had simply sighed and rested his head on her shoulder and she had held his hands and let him hug her, just as she always did when he initiated any kind of physical contact between the two of them.

He was thankful for that, but the knot in his stomach only tightened as he wondered whether she would still let him hold her, once the truth came out.

* * *

Beth stood in the kitchen doing dishes while the others were outside, helping to prepare the cars that Rick and the others who were going on the run would be taking with them. She was enjoying the silence, knowing that a bigger part of their group would be leaving, which meant that she and the others who were left would need to step up and keep watch.

“Hey, Beth,” Maggie said as she walked into the kitchen.

“Maggie,” Beth acknowledged, already knowing what was coming. She had been waiting for it since the moment she had stepped out of Daryl's bedroom, only to be caught by Maggie who had been about to visit her in her own room. The two of them had stared at each other for a moment and just as Beth had opened her mouth to speak, Daryl had stepped out of the room and right into her, which had only served to make the situation even more awkward.

Though, Beth didn't really understand why it would be awkward in the first place considering that she and Daryl weren't doing anything other than sleep next to each other. On the other hand, Maggie didn't know that. She had only seen her baby sister walking out of Daryl's bedroom. Daryl, who who in Maggie's eyes was probably too old for Beth.

“Are we ever going to talk about the fact that I caught you sneaking out of Daryl's room today?” Maggie asked bluntly.

Beth finished washing a plate and then turned around to face her. “I wasn't _sneaking_ out, Mags,” she defended. “I was just leaving the room and you happened to be there, which caught me off guard.”

“So what? You were in Daryl's room for an early morning visit?” Maggie frowned.

“No, I slept there,” Beth said, not seeing a point in keeping it a secret. She and Daryl hadn't exactly talked about letting the others in on the fact that they shared a bed, but it also wasn't any of their business. Beth just told Maggie the truth because she knew that whatever it was that was going on between her and Daryl, it probably wouldn't be a secret for too long anyway.

“You slept there...” Maggie trailed off, her frown easing out into a small smile. “And where did Daryl sleep?” she asked with a grin.

“We slept together,” Beth replied quickly. She shook her head quickly though when Maggie's eyes widened, “I mean we slept in his bed, but we didn't _do_ anything.”

“Mhm...” Maggie hummed, tilting her head to the side, giving Beth a curious once-over. “Do you wanna _do_ things with Daryl?”

“Maggie!” Beth protested, feeling her face heat up, though she still couldn't help the small smile that made its way up on her face. “We're just friends.”

“Who share the same bed,” Maggie said. “And who always sit next to each other and _always_ give each other one last _longing_ look before leaving the room and who _always_ gaze lovingly into each others eyes when you don't think anyone's lookin'–”

“We don't 'gaze lovingly' into each others eyes,” Beth laughed, punching Maggie lightly in the arm. She brushed her hair back behind her ear and shrugged then. “I don't know, Maggie. I feel like... I can't even put words to it.”

“Well, do you like him?” Maggie asked. Beth quickly looked around to make sure that they were alone and then decided that if she basically could have admitted her feelings for Daryl to Morgan, she should be able to tell her sister. She nodded a little and Maggie's smile softened. “Why don't you just tell him that then?”

“And scare him away? Maggie, I thought you knew Daryl better than I do,” Beth scoffed, dismissing the idea. She knew that she basically already _had_ confessed her feelings to Daryl the night that he had shown her his tattoos and his scars. What she had told him then – that she felt when she was with him – had been one of the most truthful things she had ever told him. He had returned the sentence to her then and she didn't doubt that he felt _something_ for her, but she was just worried that if she actually came out and told him that she wanted to try for something more between them, that he would get scared and run the other way. Whenever things happened between them, Beth wanted them to happen naturally, like they seemed to have been doing up until now.

There were times though, when she wondered about things that she thought she really shouldn't wonder about. She told herself that she was being ridiculous and that she shouldn't even think about it, but she couldn't stop herself from going there. Sometimes, during the night, when she would wake up because of a dream, she would look at Daryl and just _wonder_.

She would wonder again _why_ he hadn't just told her the truth and silently ask herself if he really blamed himself for what had happened to her and if he was trying to protect her, like Rick had suggested. The second thing that would come to her mind would be if there was even the slightest chance that she had known the girl he had been in love with once before – the girl he had burned himself for because he hadn't been able to express his pain in another way. Her mind would to the strangest of things then, which she would usually end up beating herself up about mentally because it was absolutely _ridiculous._ She would find herself wondering if there was even the slightest of chances that _she_ was the girl.

She would look at Daryl's sleeping form and then snuggle in closer to him, forcing the thought away from her mind. To think that Daryl might have loved her the way that he had obviously loved that girl, was almost unthinkable. If anything, Beth would be the luckiest girl in the world to know that he loved her half as much now, but at the same time, the thought of _anyone_ loving her scared her.

Familial love was one thing. Like the love she felt for Morgan and Maggie, Glenn and everyone else in the group...but _romantic_ love was something else entirely. She didn't know how she would react to such a confession, though she didn't exactly think that she and Daryl were there yet. Or well, she knew that she felt deeply for him and yes, she might be falling more and more in love with him with every day that passed, but she wasn't sure either of them was ready to confess such a thing to the other. She certainly wasn't.

She remembered how determined Daryl had been when the group had gathered up to discuss who would be going on the run. He had immediately stepped up and said that he would be staying because he had known that she wouldn't be volunteering either. They had talked about it the night before and she had told him that she didn't think she was ready to go on a run yet. He had told her that it didn't matter and that everyone else would understand. When she'd asked him in a whisper if he would be going, he'd looked at her as if she'd lost her mind and told her that he wasn't going to leave her.

Daryl was a confusing man sometimes, to say the least. It didn't change the fact that her heart still skipped a beat when he'd said those words to her and she'd allowed herself to press her lips against his jaw to show him her gratitude. She wanted to have him close to her and just as much as he didn't want to leave her behind.

“I'm startin' to think that none of us knew Daryl _enough_ before,” Maggie sighed, leaning against the counter, crossing her arms over her chest.

“What do you mean?” Beth asked, breaking out of her thoughts.

“I'm just sayin' that he's different with you than he is with the rest of us,” Maggie shrugged. “Never seen him be like this before.”

“Not even with–” Beth cut herself off abruptly when the door to the kitchen opened and Glenn walked in, followed by Tara who was carrying Judith. Maggie frowned at her, but didn't say anything, understanding that whatever it was that Beth had wanted to ask her should be kept between sisters.

“Hey,” Tara grinned as Judith squirmed in her arms. “You guys about done in here? They're getting ready to drive off.”

“Yeah,” Beth nodded, quickly wiping her hands on a towel she'd left nearby. She looked over at Maggie, “You ready?”

“Mhm,” Maggie hummed, still looking curious to know what it was that Beth had intended to ask before. Glenn stepped up next to her and planted a kiss on her cheek, which seemed to distract her though. “You should be resting,” Maggie laughed, dodging Glenn's lips. He'd caught a cold and hadn't protested much when Maggie had told him that he couldn't come along on the run.

“I've been resting all morning,” Glenn complained before looking over at Beth. “We should figure out something to do to pass time when the others leave.”

“Oh, great,” Maggie scoffed. “You're already plannin' all the fun you're gonna have when I'm gone.”

“It'll distract me from all the fun we're gonna have when you come back,” Glenn grinned.

“Ew, _gross_ ,” Beth groaned, throwing her towel at his face. “That's my sister you're talkin' about, Glenn. I don't wanna know what you guys do in the privacy of your room much less than you'd wanna know what I do when I'm alone in mine.”

There was a sound of someone clearing their throat and Beth looked up, breath hitching when she saw Daryl standing awkwardly in the doorway. There seemed to be just a hint of red flushing his skin and Beth bit her lip to keep herself from saying anything else in utter embarrassment.

“Uh, Rick asked me to get y'all,” he muttered, shifting his crossbow from one shoulder to the other. His eyes connected with Beth's for a moment and she couldn't help but notice how they swept over her body once before flickering away. She silently wondered what exactly he was thinking about now.

“Well then,” Maggie grinned. “Let's get goin'.”

Glenn and Maggie walked out of the kitchen hand in hand and Tara followed them quickly. Though, before she slipped past Daryl, she turned around and winked at Beth, who didn't really know how to read that particular move. Beth turned to look at Daryl who was still standing in the doorway, looking anywhere but at her it seemed.

She walked up to him and stood before him, knowing that he wouldn't be able to ignore her then. His eyes finally moved to meet hers again and she worried her lower lip between her teeth, not knowing what to say to make the situation less awkward. Just knowing what she'd implied and that he'd overheard her, when the two of them had been sleeping in the same bed for days... Well, she didn't really know what he might be thinking and she didn't know if it would be okay to just ask.

Luckily for her though, it seemed as if Daryl decided that her little slip-up wasn't worth mentioning again and he seemed to get over the embarrassment he had clearly felt for overhearing her comment. He reached out and touched her hand briefly before nodding his head in the direction of the door, nudging her with his elbow so that she would move forward. Yet again she found herself smiling at him and silently thanking him for not making a big deal of the situation.

The two of them walked outside together and Beth's eyes instantly settled on Carol and Tyreese who were hugging. Tyreese seemed to be telling Carol not to worry about him and that he would be back soon enough and the woman was smiling at him, whispering something back to him that Beth couldn't catch from such a distance. Beth knew though, that Carol still hadn't recovered fully from losing Noah and out of everyone in the group besides Daryl, she was probably closest with Tyreese. Beth understood that Carol wouldn't want to lose him, especially not since he had been such a strong pillar for her to lean on after Noah had been killed.

Michonne and Rick embraced Carl separately and then kissed Judith on the cheek, who was still in Tara's arms. Rosita hugged Eugene and told him not to mess around with the electricity until they returned and Abraham gave him a pat on the back, telling him to keep an eye open and relax.

It was nice seeing the people of the group reassuring each other. There wouldn't be many of them left on the farm for this run, since it was important that they found all the supplies they might need before Winter rolled in. They couldn't afford going on too many runs now that the weather was getting colder and the roads could become slippery again, as they had been the previous Winter.

“Beth,” Maggie said, stepping forward to hug her.

“I swear, Mags, if you tell me to be careful I'll slap you. You know that I can take care of myself,” Beth said, hugging her back nonetheless.

“Oh, I know you can take care of yourself,” Maggie smirked when she pulled back. “I was just gonna tell you to keep an eye on Glenn for me.”

Glenn let out a sound of protest and Beth couldn't help but grin before embracing her sister again.

“We'll back in a day and a half,” Maggie said when she pulled back again. She turned then to Daryl, who was still standing next to Beth, looking a little awkward. “You though need to keep an eye on her for me. Don't want her to go 'round swinging punches at people.”

Daryl didn't say anything but Beth did notice how his mouth twitched a little, which was the only sign that he had been amused by Maggie's comment.  He finally took a few steps away from Beth and walked over to Rick, patting his back before telling him to keep his eyes open at all times and to be careful. Beth tried her best to ignore just how cold she felt without having him next to her, but she didn't want to be  _that_ kind of girl.

She came to stand next to Morgan as they waved off their loved ones and she felt Daryl take his place by her side. Never before had she fought off a grin from covering her face more than the moment that Daryl clasped her hand in his.

* * *

Daryl laid down on her bed without any hesitation this time. Tonight they would be sleeping in her room and he had gotten comfortable enough to just know that it was okay for him to lay down while she got ready for bed. He was used to watching her too and it seemed to him like she didn't mind sometimes showing a little more skin around him when they were alone than before. Still though, whenever she shrugged out of her pants or lifted her shirt over her head, he averted his eyes, if anything out of respect for the woman.

He felt the mattress sink down a little as Beth sat on the edge of the bed, tying her hair up in a bun. She'd opted to wear a simple tank-top to bed tonight instead of the shirt she usually wore and Daryl couldn't help but reach out and touch her upper arm, feeling her shudder beneath his touch.

“Aren't ya gonna get cold?” he asked her, despite the fact that he suddenly felt warm all over at the thought of having move of Beth's skin touching his when they slept next to each other.

“I have you in my bed,” Beth said, glancing at him over her shoulder. “You're like my own personal heater.”

“You sayin' I'm hot, Greene?” he asked, not being able to help but tease her. Besides, she teased him enough as it was.

“ _Very_ ,” Beth emphasized jokingly – or at least he figured she was yet again teasing him – before finally laying down next to him, her head resting on his upper arm as her own hand reached up to brush away his hair from his face. This time, it was his time to shudder, but he suppressed it the best he could, instead turning his head so that he could look down at her.

Brushing the back of his hand against her cheek, he watched as her eyes fluttered shut and she moved a little bit closer to him.

“Maggie asked me about this morning,” she whispered then, making him stop his movements. His hand had moved to the few strands of hair that were still loose around her face. He knew that it had been inevitable the moment he had stepped right into Beth when he'd been walking out of his bedroom. The look on Maggie's face had just told him that she would be asking either him or Beth about whatever it was that was going on between them.

“Mhm...” he hummed, his hand finally resting on her shoulder as he turned a little so that he could face her more fully. He didn't know what to say, even though he had a thousand questions running around in his mind. He would just let Beth take the lead on this one, he decided.

But Beth too seemed to be hesitant. She just looked at him and closed her eyes again, sighing. He understood what she wasn't telling him. It was clear that she wasn't ready to talk about it yet and he knew that the best thing he could to would probably be to just hold her.

“Sleep, Beth,” he told her softly. “Ya worked all day long and you're tired... Just sleep tonight.”

“Can we talk about it tomorrow?” she asked him hesitantly. He leaned down and brushed his lips lightly against her forehead, closing his eyes, just _savoring_ the moment.

“Yeah,” he agreed, “we'll talk 'bout it then.” Beth's arm around him tightened a little and she moved her leg, swinging it over his as she pushed herself even closer to him. Daryl swallowed thickly, willing his body not to react to the closeness. He didn't know what he would tell her tomorrow, but he knew that he had to give her something. If anything, he needed clarity just as much as she did. They needed to talk about what was changing and he wasn't sure if it would be better for them to talk about what they should or shouldn't say to anyone else.

Hours passed and Daryl had trouble falling asleep, unlike Beth who was still just as relaxed by his side as she'd been when she'd first joined him on the bed. He just couldn't take his eyes off of her and every single time he wondered why, his heart would skip a beat and remind him of the fact that he had fallen for her like he had never thought he would be able to fall for anyone.

He loved her so much that it fucking hurt. He loved her so much that all he wanted was to tell her about all the things he had been keeping from her, just so that he would keep her safe.

Sunlight filled the room and Daryl's eyes fluttered open slowly. It took him a moment, but soon he realized that he must have finally gotten some hours of sleep. His hand was resting on Beth's lower back, underneath her tank-top and his fingers twitched a little when he felt her bare skin against his palm. He shifted a little, trying to set at least some distance between their bodies so that Beth wouldn't feel the hardness in his pants.

“Don't move,” Beth murmured. “I want you close.” He glanced at her, but her eyes were still closed. For a moment, he wondered whether she was actually aware of what she was asking of him, but he couldn't be sure exactly. He started to move again and this time Beth's grip on him only tightened and the leg that she had thrown over his pulled him back towards her. “I said _don't move_ ,” she repeated, this time a little louder.

She opened her eyes and he stared into them – Into _her_. Their faces were so close that he would only need to shift a little to close the distance between them and kiss her. He wanted to, more than he had ever wanted anything else in his life, but he knew that he couldn't.

_Could he?_

“You sleep good?” Beth asked him before he had a chance to think about it any further.

“Always do...” he trailed off when she stretched a little, still wrapped up around him. He could feel her chest brushing against his and he was almost glad that she had worn a bra to bed. The strap of her tank-top had fallen down which made the light blue bra-strap more visible. His hand was already on her back under her shirt and his mind began trailing into dangerous territories when he imagined just how easy it would be to unclasp it, if he just moved up a little bit.

“Even when I _clearly_ attack you in my sleep?” Beth joked, not removing herself from his body. Instead, she only seemed to press a little tighter, making him twitch in his pants again. She paused for a moment and it horrified him that she would actually say something about it this time. It wasn't the first time that he'd woken up with a hard-on next to her and he was sure that if they continued sleeping in the same bed, it wouldn't be the last.

“ _Beth_ ,” he let out a harsh breath, but she placed her hand on the back of his head, playing with his hair there.

“Daryl–”

“ _Ah!_ ”

It took him a second to process the scream that had torn through the morning silence. Beth's hand froze and she stilled in his arms. His heart beat picked up a few notches when he heard the distinct sound of a gunshot going off and then another scream following.

They were both frozen, it seemed, until they heard Judith's loud wails and Carl's screaming next. He was pretty certain he half-climbed over Beth's body to get to his boots, but Beth wasn't too far behind. Grabbing his crossbow, he show a look at her when she took her spare gun and knife-holster, strapping it quickly to her thigh before moving toward the door, not bothering to throw on something to wear over her pajamas. Whatever it was that was happening, they needed to get out of the house quickly.

They ran down the stairs and Daryl flung open the front door without thinking about it twice, his crossbow already held high and his previous state of arousal all gone. The sight that met him made him freeze over as a chill ran over his spine.

Tara was kneeling on the ground, clutching Judith who was still crying to her chest. Carl was next to her with Eugene, pressing his hands against Sasha's shoulder which was bleeding profusely. Carol was hovering over an unconscious Morgan who was bleeding from the back of his head.

Around them, stood about fifteen strange men. Some of them were armed while others held on to long chains that were secured around the feet of seven walkers who were struggling to break free and walk toward them, growling and hissing as they reached for them with their arms.

“ _Morgan!_ ” Beth yelled, trying to push her way past Daryl, but he grabbed her arm as quickly as he could, hauling her back to stand behind him. Glenn, who was also kneeling on the grass looked up at them, as did everyone else. It seemed like Glenn had been trying to talk to one of the men – an average built man that Daryl was sure he could have taken down in a fair fight – and panic flared up in the younger man's eyes as he saw Beth and Daryl standing in the doorway.

The man he had been talking to suddenly smirked, running a hand through his clearly greasy hair.

“That's them!” A younger man exclaimed from one of the vehicles that had surrounded the farmhouse. “That's the man who killed your uncle and that's the blonde chick he was tryin' to protect!”

“Shut up, Ben,” the leader of the group growled, making the kid close his mouth effectively. Daryl lifted his crossbow, aiming at the other man's head, despite knowing that he couldn't risk everyone else. If he killed the leader, the others might open fire and then the risk was that none of them would survive. “Well, well, well,” he grinned cruelly at Daryl and Beth. “I suggest the two of ya put down your weapons so that we can all have a _long_ nice _chat_.”

“Daryl...” Beth whispered behind him. He could sense the panic rolling off of her body. His eyes moved again toward Morgan who Carol was trying to take care of, despite having a gun pressed to the back of her head. He admired his friend for not even flinching when the asshole behind her pressed the gun a little close to her, sneering at her from where he stood. Daryl would make sure to remember his face so that when everything eventually went to hell – because it _would_ – he would be the one to kill him.

“Put your fuckin' weapons on the ground and _kneel_ ,” the leader ordered, this time louder. His shout made Judith cry out louder and Daryl felt Beth's hand tighten on his arm. The man snorted, turning around so that his gun was pointed toward Tara who was desperately trying to calm down Judith. “Put 'em down or I'll shoot the baby.”

A second ticked by and Beth's nails dug into his skin, almost drawing blood. He knew that there wasn't a choice to make anymore. They were outnumbered even if Sasha and Morgan hadn't been out of the picture. He glanced at Beth and gave her the tiniest nod he could muster before slowly lowering his crossbow to the ground. Holding up his hands, he took a few steps closer to the man.

“Ya don't have to do this,” he said, voice rough due to the fact that he had been asleep just a few minutes ago. Yet, he had never been more alert in his life. “We can talk 'bout this and settle for somethin'. What do ya want?”

“Your Asian's already tried to talk to me,” the man snorted. “You don't got anythin' that I want. Just somethin' I can _take_.”

From his peripheral view Daryl saw Beth put her gun and her knives on the ground, kneeling next to him.

“And what is that?” she challenged, her voice not wavering even once, making Daryl fall in love with her just a little bit more.

The man smirked, shifting his weapon toward the two of them instead, aiming straight at Beth's head.

“ _Revenge_ ,” he answered, clicking his tongue once as his eyes widened, making him look even crazier than he sounded. “I think it's 'bout time I introduced myself, don't ya think, Darling?” he grinned, taking a step toward Beth which only made Daryl want to growl. “Name's John and this is my group.”

* * *

John felt like bouncing on his feet. He had _finally_ gotten the upper hand on these people; the people who had not only killed some of his men, but also his uncle and then settled on _his_ land.

He had been watching them for over a week, sending out some of his men to keep an eye on the farm that they had located a while back when they had followed the trail that had been left behind from the store that his uncle had been scavenging through with his own little team.

John knew from what his men had told him that the bigger part of the group had been planning to head out on a run to get supplies for the Winter that awaited them all and he had just _known_ that he needed to make his move. So when the time presented itself, he had taken the few men that were left in his group and a couple of the walkers they had been collecting, and simply attacked.

They had knocked out the older black man who had been keeping guard and dragged his body along to the house where one of his men had shot at the younger black woman who had aimed her sniper rifle at them, shooting her in the shoulder. The other two women in the yard had panicked and one of them had grabbed the baby that had been playing, while the Asian man had aimed his weapon at them before he had realized that they were outnumbered.

Everything was going according to plan and when the blonde that he had seen a few times ran out of the farmhouse along with the other man, John had been on the verge of bursting out of pure glee.

He would take care of them all, one by one, just as he had promised. But not before telling them just what he would do to the rest of the group when they returned and found them all _slaughtered_.

* * *

The man – _John_ , Beth reminded herself – walked toward her and Daryl where they were kneeling. There was a wicked gleam in his eyes that told her that he had lost his mind long ago, maybe right at the start of the Outbreak. It pained her to know that men like this had survived, but her loved ones hadn't.

“I think everyone's accounted for,” John said, grinning back at his men who snickered. He turned his head to the side, “Take their weapons, tie 'em up and take the archer.”

“ _No!_ ” Beth's protest slipped out of her mouth before she could stop herself and she began standing when she felt one of the men grab her from behind, holding her hands together as two others took a hold of Daryl.

“Beth, don't–” Daryl began, but was cut off when one of the men punched him in the stomach. He grunted out in pain and Beth watched as a third man came forward with a couple of zip-ties in his hands, tying Daryl's hands together behind his back. She felt something tightening around her own wrists before she was pushed forward, knees hitting the dirt on the ground before Daryl was brought to stand before John, who turned to look at her.

“Ya name's Beth then?” he said, giving her a once-over which made her feel filthy. His gray, emotionless eyes seemed to light up at something then as they raked almost hungrily over her body and it made Beth feel even more uncomfortable considering that she wasn't wearing much.

She had been taught by Morgan not to show weakness. They had been on the road together for a while and had come across people from time to time who they had had to deal with, one way or another. So when John stared her down, she raised her head and held it high, not giving him an answer besides the coldest stare she could muster.

“You're quite a little spitfire, aren't ya, Darling?” John chuckled, taking a small step toward her. “I like that in a woman. Maybe I could keep ya around for a little longer, after I kill your friends?”

Beth's eyes moved briefly to the others, seeing a mixture of emotions cross their faces as they heard what John was saying. Her eyes connected with Daryl's for a second and she saw nothing but anger there.

“Don't touch me,” Beth hissed when John reached out to touch her cheek. She didn't want his hands on her.

“Well aren't ya a sweet one,” John mused, crouching down so that he was almost eye-level with her. He reached out quickly and grabbed her hair, pulling her face closer to his and Beth couldn't help but wince at the painful tug. “I bet ya taste mighty fine as well,” he said, loud enough for everyone else to hear.

“She told ya not to fuckin' touch her,” Daryl growled then, starting to struggle against the men who were still holding him.

John eased his grip on Beth's hair and she sank back to the ground, head pounding already. Slowly, he turned to look at Daryl, the sadistically amused expression still on his face. “She your gal?” he asked, making Beth look over at Daryl who pressed his lips tightly together, not meeting her gaze but not backing down with his stare on John either. “She's a pretty little thing... Vulnerable, weak... _Young_ _._ I can see the appeal.” The man took a step back from Beth and looked over at the other people in Beth's group. She turned her own gaze to Sasha, who was still bleeding from her shoulder and Carl, who was desperately trying to get the bleeding under control.

“Never come across a group quite like yours,” John sneered at no one in particular, but when he turned toward Daryl, Beth figured that he was addressing him. “ The few that we did find weren't nearly as organized as you all. Been watching you for a while now.”

“How long?” Daryl asked, anger as evident in his tone as it was visible in his eyes. Beth remembered Rick telling her that Daryl thought there might have been more in play when it came to the herd that had passed by, taking Noah's life and she wondered if Daryl was thinking about that too when his face hardened.

“A couple of weeks,” John replied coldly. “Ya killed my uncle and some of my men in a mall a while back. Ben  over here saw y' a ll,” he said, motioning to the lanky kid that had pointed out Beth and Daryl when they had exited the house. “He was hidin' like a coward, but he saw you lot killing my men an' then I decided to make some arrangements while we looked for ya.” He walked toward Sasha and Carl, pushing Carl away from Sasha's body. Beth could see that Sasha's breathing was coming out in heavy pants, sweat beading on her forehead as she slowly bled from her gunshot wound. John reached for her bleeding shoulder and pressed two of his fingers into it, causing Sasha to scream out in pain.

“Stop!” Carl protested, moving toward John quickly, but the man lifted his gun and aimed it at Carl's head, making him stop. Eugene moved closer to Carl, trying to pull him back, but Beth could see that the scientist was afraid to make any sudden movements, in case John lost it completely.

“He's just a boy!” Beth yelled at John. “What good would it do you to kill him? Let him take care of her!”

“You're all gonna die anyway,” John said, cocking the gun, still aiming at Carl. “A bullet to the head would be a merciful death.”

B eth felt a sudden itch under her chin, where her own bullet wou n d was and she leaned back a little, trying to wiggle her hands, but the zip-ties were tied too tightly. “You were telling us a story,” she said, catching John's attention. “Don't you want us all to hear it before you kill us?”

“ Yes,” John nodded slowly, removing his hand from Sasha's shoulder as he lowered his gun. He motioned to one of his men. “Get her damn shoulder under control so she doesn't bleed out before she hears the story.”

“But, Boss–”

“I said: Get her  _ fuckin'  _ shoulder wrapped!” John yelled, causing Judith to once again start crying and the walkers that were tied up to start struggling against their chains again. The man he had ordered quickly went to one of the cars and came out with a couple of bandages, already walking over to Sasha. Beth heard him tell Carl to get out of the way, but her focus then moved to Morgan, who was still unconscious.

“What about him?” she asked, nodding her head in the direction of the man she saw as a father. “Can you bandage him up as well?”

“He's been out this entire time,” John said. “Shoulda just killed him since he's missing the story anyway...” Beth watched as Carol immediately draped herself over Morgan's body, not letting John even look at him. She kind of wished she had just kept her mouth shut.

“Just keep talkin',” Daryl said then, stealing John's attention once more. “Tell us how ya tricked us all into believin' we were safe. How ya watched us an' everythin' else ya did.”

“Ya wanna know what I did?” John asked, a wide grin spreading across his face again, making him look as crazed as he sounded in that moment. Beth felt both fear and gratitude ripple through her. Daryl had taken the attention away from Morgan, probably saving his life in the process, but at the same time, he had put himself in danger, which Beth didn't like at all. “I've been gatherin' strong men ever since the fuckin' world ended! I've been cleanin' this whole damn area of those dead fuckers and what do I get as a thanks? People tellin' me I'm sadistic for keepin' some of them locked up so that those who oppose me can be given an agonizing death through a bite. Men who give up their wives, lettin' me fuck them an' then kill them because it's the most merciful thing to do! They know there's worse things out there than me, so why the fuck not give someone they love up to save them and themselves?”

“You're _sick_ ,” Beth spat, scrunching her nose up in disgust at what she was hearing. If she wasn't sure whether this man was mentally stable before, she sure as hell was now. He _was_ crazy.

John snapped his head in her direction, stalking up to her, eating up the distance between them. “The New World can't flourish when the weak ones remain,” he snapped at her, eyes wild, greasy hair sticking out as he ran his hands through it. “That's why you'll be the first one I kill after I tell you everythin', _Girl_. Seems like I won't be keepin' ya after all, so your redneck loverboy over there can relax.”

Beth tugged lightly at the zip-tie holding her wrists tied up, feeling it digging into her skin. “There's a hardware store a few miles away,” she said, blowing away some hair from her face. She couldn't let herself get distracted; couldn't show how his words affected her. “I almost died there because someone locked up some walkers in an office without puttin' up a warning sign. Was that you too?”

“Had my men set up traps while we looked for y'all,” John nodded. “That was 'fore we found ya and released that herd of biters on ya.”

Beth's eyes narrowed, her heart hammering in her chest as all the pieces fell together. “You did that,” she acknowledged. “You _killed_ my friend!”

John laughed, “Ya killed my uncle. He was the only family I had left and ya killed him. It was only fair. I had hoped that the dead ones would get more of ya, but clearly, I underestimated y'all.”

“Your uncle attacked _us_ first!” Beth snapped. “We only killed them because they tried to kill us! Probably on your orders too, so if anythin', _you_ killed your uncle!”

“ _Enough!_ ” John yelled at her, pushing her backwards a little, towering over her body.

“Don't go near her ya stupid–” Daryl's string of curses was interrupted with a grunt. Beth turned in his direction and saw that one of the men had once again punched him, this time in the face, giving him a nosebleed. “ _Son of a bitch_ ,” Daryl swore, wincing in pain since he couldn't even reach up and touch his nose which probably hurt like hell.

“Don't hurt him,” Beth said, looking at John again. She knew she was getting herself in trouble, but she needed to keep the maniac occupied for a little bit longer. Rick and the others were probably on their way back toward the farm by now and she knew that they would probably know that something was wrong once they saw the tire tracks of the strange vehicles.

“Please,” Glenn said then. “Let's talk about this, please? You can't seriously be thinking about killing a _baby_.”

“She's a girl,” John said. “She'll probably become _very_ pretty once she's all grown up.”

The implication of it all made Beth sick to her stomach. She looked over at Tara, who clutched Judith tighter to her chest, trying to keep her safe. Beth's eyes connected with her friend's and she could see that the other woman too feared what the madman had just said.

“But for _now_ ,” John said, once again facing Daryl. “Why don't you boys show this crossbow-wielding asshole just what happens when someone kills my family?”

Before Beth could even contemplate what was happening, four of the men surrounded Daryl and began beating him. Somewhere in the background someone began screaming, cursing and yelling at the men to stop and it took her a moment to realize that  _she_ was the one yelling.

“Stop! _Stop it!_ I swear to everythin' that when I get out of this I'm gonna kill every last one of you!” Beth screamed, feeling blood drip from her wrist as she tried to get out of her binds. “ _John_!” she yelled his name. “Stop them! They're going to kill him!”

“He killed my uncle,” John said calmly. “Ben identified him for me.”

“He did it for _me_ ,” Beth cried out. “He did it to protect _me_! Your uncle was as sick as you are and he was going to _rape_ me! Daryl wouldn't have been able to get away from the men that were holding him if _I_ hadn't been the one to first disarm your _fucking_ uncle!”

_Slap!_

* * *

The pain ceased.

Daryl tried blinking his eyes open as the loud slap echoed through his mind, over and over again. Slowly, his focus was returning, but he could already feel one of his eyes swelling shut and he was pretty sure he might have a cracked rib as well as some bruised ones. Still, out of all the ringing in his own ears, he somehow managed to focus on the one person he needed to know was safe.

From what he could see, Beth's cheek was red. It wasn't the blush that he sometimes caused and it wasn't from hard work either. No, the sick son of a bitch – _John_ – had actually _slapped_ her. He had put his hands on Beth, not only once, but several times in the span of the few hours that he had been there.

Had there been hours? Daryl wasn't sure. It felt as if a year had passed since he had come out this morning, running after hearing screams of terror in the front yard.

And now, Daryl could see a knife being pressed to Beth's throat. Panic flared up in him instantly and he knew, just _knew_ that the man was going to end her. John was going to kill Beth for trying to protect him; trying to stop John's men from beating him to death. She was going to die by having her throat slit, all because of him.

She was going to die again because of him.

“Take me instead,” Beth said then, her voice low but sure. Daryl tried to make a sound of protest, but he couldn't get a word out. His throat felt thick, but tears sprang to his eyes, not only because of the pain he was in, but also because he was going to fucking lose her again and it was his own fucking fault.

“Leave Daryl and the others alone and I'll come with you,” Beth continued. “You'll get your revenge by killing me. Nothing would hurt them more...” She trailed off and Daryl couldn't help but wonder if she actually knew that it was true what she was saying. It would hurt more to lose her again than to lose his own life. He would probably end up killing himself if he actually lost her again. If maybe he hadn't developed these feelings for her again – if he hadn't let himself fall in love with her again – maybe this all wouldn't be happening now?

“What am I gonna do with a weak little girl like _you_?” John spat at Beth. Daryl's hands began trembling, both in fear and in anger. Beth was _strong_. She was a fucking survivor and this tool knew nothing about her or the people in his group. He was laying on the dirty ground though, not feeling particularly strong in that moment.

He thought he saw something moving, but he couldn't be sure. Besides, his focus was solely on Beth again because the young woman had just begun laughing.

“What the fuck is wrong with ya?” John demanded as tears began falling down Beth's cheeks as she laughed, almost hysterically. Daryl himself wondered if she might have finally lost it. He was about to, so he was sure he couldn't exactly blame her either for going crazy.

“You keep calling me _weak_ ,” Beth laughed, staring defiantly at the man who still had his knife pressed to her throat. “You know _nothing_ about me or what I've been through,” she then snapped, eyes narrowing as her tone filled with pure rage. “You killed my friend and you hurt my _family_. I am going to fucking kill you,” she swore, eyes wild and fierce as ever.

Daryl had heard her curse quite a few times since they had been reunited, but there was something dangerous about her tone that it made him shiver.

“I am anythin' but weak,” Beth continued then. “I survived a fucking gunshot to the head! I lost my damn memories and yet I still found my family and I _survived_! I'm not gonna let some psychopath kill _anyone_ I love, ever again!”

“Ya think ya can keep me distracted by talkin' shit, Darling?” John asked her, tilting his head to the side. “Spewin' bullshit 'bout surviving a shot through your fuckin' head? Ya expect me to but that shit?”

“It's the truth,” Beth grinned. “ _Honest to God_. Although, I was actually tryin' to keep you occupied too.”

There was something moving. Daryl could see it in his peripheral view, but he wasn't sure what was happening. He could feel his eyes dropping slowly as the pain flared up again. Though, the ache was dulling due to the adrenaline, he still wouldn't be able to do anything.

He wouldn't be able to save her.

“Occupied?” John repeated, sounding almost curious as he took a small step back, the hand that was holding his knife lowering slowly.

“Yeah,” Beth smirked. “Until _they_ came back and I could do _this_.”

It all happened so quickly that Daryl had trouble comprehending it first. All he knew was that he saw Beth lift up her hands – her _unbound_ hands – one of her throwing knives in one of them. For a split second, he saw her red blood dripping down her wrist that she had clearly cut into by accident when she'd cut herself loose and the next thing he knew, Beth had thrown herself at John, her knife connecting with the side of his neck, sending a spray of blood across her face.

Daryl heard gunshots, panicked yells and he thought he saw Tara running into the house with Judith, trying to protect the child. He saw Michonne appearing, seemingly out of nowhere, Rick following her as they delivered shot after shot, killing the bastards that were keeping them captive. Abraham, Rosita, Maggie and Tyreese shot as well and Daryl was almost thankful that he couldn't stand because he sure as hell wouldn't have been useful in his state and would probably just have ended up caught in the crossfire. He saw Michonne beheading the walkers that John had brought with him too, but to be quite honest, he couldn't really concentrate on anything other than Beth.

He watched as she twisted her knife in John's throat, watched as she turned it upwards and pressed forward, forcing it toward his brain. There was blood all over her, but she seemed to only be able to stare into the already dead eyes of the man who had almost killed them all; the man who had caused Noah's death and almost her own.

It brought back other memories for Daryl though.

His mind moved to a hallway in a hospital. To where Beth had pulled a similar move and had ended up with a bullet through her head and he had ended up with her blood on his lips. He was back in that hallway, watching her fall and fall and fall, her blood pooling around her as he knelt and cried and held her petite frame against him. The images were so strong, that his brain wasn't processing that Beth was still alive – that she had killed John – because all he could see was Dawn shooting her and her _dying_ in front of him.

And it was his fault.

It was all his fault.

He tried to say her name when he saw her appear in front of him, blood on her face as she cupped his cheeks, repeating his name over and over again but it was already too late. He was losing her again and he could only blame himself, as her face and everything else, faded into darkness.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh-oh. Daryl's unconscious, Morgan is injured, Sasha's been shot, and Miss Beth Greene is still the fierce badass that we all love. I was a little worried about what you guys might think about this chapter, so a review would really mean a lot to me. Tell me what you thought of the Bethyl fluff and if the way I decided to deal with John and his group was okay. I really didn't want to prolong it and to be honest, John was a nut-job that I just wanted gone.
> 
> The next chapter takes place immediately after this one as the group deals with the aftermath of what happened. Daryl and Beth are going to have a serious talk, but things aren't going to go smoothly...
> 
> Hope you liked this one and I can't wait to hear from you! Thank you for reading and for supporting! :) xx


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth shares something and Daryl makes a decision. Maggie has news and the family decide whether or not they should stay on the farm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short note: Glad everyone liked the last chapter! Don't hate me for this one! *Hides quickly behind a chair*

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 23

When Daryl came to, his mind wasn't fully able to comprehend what had occurred. He remembered waking up after a long night of just holding Beth wrapped up around him and trying not to think about how she would react when he finally told her the truth.

It wasn't until he tried to move that he felt the sharp pain in his side, that he recognized as a bruised rib, that he fully remembered what had happened.

The men, Morgan being unconscious, Sasha being shot, him being beaten and Beth – _Beth!_

“Hey, hey, hey!” Rick said as he shot up from the couch he was laying in, ignoring the protest that his body was making. His friend and brother gently tried to push him back down on the couch, but Daryl shook his head wildly, making himself feel dizzy in the process.

“What happened? Where's she?” He could hear that his own words were slurred and he shut his eyes tightly as the bright light that someone pointed in his eyes made his head explode in pain as well.

“His pupils are responding fine,” he recognized Eugene's voice. It seemed like the fake scientist was giving him a check-up, most likely since Morgan was out of the picture.

“Morgan?” Daryl asked, putting a hand to his forehead before looking over at Rick, who seemed to still have blood splattered on his face from the fight that had ensued. That meant that not much time could have passed. “How long was I out?” Daryl added as an afterthought.

“Maggie's stitchin' up his head in Abe's room,” Rick said, nodding his head in the direction. “He lost some blood, but he should recover just fine. It was a head wound, which was why it bled so damn much... As for how long you've been out? No more than an hour. We brought you in here so that we could clean up the bodies outside... Sasha's been stitched up too, but she isn't gonna be able to use her arm for a good while. If a nerve or somethin' was injured, she might never be able to regain full use of it.”

Daryl swallowed thickly, looking away from Rick. He knew how important it was for someone to be able to protect themselves in this world. If Sasha truly lost all sense in her arm, she would become vulnerable. “We'll keep her safe,” Daryl said, finally being able to pull himself up into a sitting position.

“That's what Beth said too,” Rick nodded thoughtfully. Daryl looked at him and Rick's lip twitched. “She's fine, Daryl. Outside, helpin' with the corpses. You probably shouldn't–”

Daryl grunted as he stood up, grabbing Rick's shoulder to support himself briefly. His friend helped him stand and after testing his feet for a few moments, Daryl was able to stand all on his own. There was nothing that was going to keep him from seeing Beth right now.

He walked toward the front door slowly. In the kitchen, he saw Carl sitting with Judith in his arms and Michonne embracing the both of them at the same time. Sensing eyes on her, the woman looked over at him, but he could do nothing other than offer her a short nod as well. He stepped outside and was met by the sight of darkened dirt – probably from the blood – and bodies being piled up in Morgan's truck, once again. Carol was in the front seat driving and Daryl watched as Abraham and Glenn hauled the last body of the men who had attacked them on the bed. Glenn hurried to sit in the front with Carol while Abraham called after them that he would be with them shortly. Tara and Rosita were nowhere in sight. He knew that Maggie was inside, stitching up Morgan and that Sasha was somewhere in the house recovering, but it took him a moment to spot Beth.

She was sitting with her back turned toward him and the house, eyes set on the field in front of her that the truck had driven off in. Her hands were resting on her knees and Daryl noticed immediately that she hadn't even changed yet. She was still in her pajamas and there was blood everywhere on her upper body, making her look almost dangerous. He remembered the way that she had attacked John, the madman who had brought his men to their new home and planned to kill them all. From what he could tell now, everyone in his group – in his _family_ – had survived the attack, but clearly not without injuries.

Suddenly, Abraham was standing in front of him, looking down at him with concern written in his eyes. “She hasn't moved from her seat in thirty minutes,” he told him. “Rosita and Tara tried to tell her to rest for a moment when she began hauling the bodies to the truck, but she was out of it since Rick an' Tyreese carried you inside. Wouldn't let us check her for any injuries, but I'll bring ya a medical kit, if you're up for it?”

Daryl was surprised by the low tone that Abraham was using. It was clear that what had happened seemed to have shaken him too, or at least the man seemed to have the decency to know when it was appropriate to be loud and when everyone needed some silence. Now, he was once again proving to Daryl that he was indeed a good man and that even though he sometimes had issues with his temper, he still cared about the people in their family.

“Thanks,” Daryl said, bowing his head in a short nod before he began walking toward Beth. When he finally reached her – which took a little longer than he would have liked – he sat down on the bench next to her and looked down at her hands. He noticed that she was holding on to his red rag, which was wet, but he didn't know from what.

Slowly, he reached out and touched her wrist. Beth flinched, turning her head away from him for a second before relaxing and turning back to face him fully. Her eyes seemed so blank, so _empty,_ but Daryl could tell that her mind just hadn't settled for what to feel right now. He too felt almost numb, despite the pain that was still coursing his body.

Abraham brought him the medical kit shortly after and Daryl placed it on the table before taking Beth's hand in his. “Need to check ya wrist,” he told her softly. “You're still bleedin' an' I don't want ya to get an infection.”

“It's just a shallow cut,” Beth retorted but offered him her wrist nonetheless. When he took her hand, he didn't dare looking up at her, even when she shivered. He knew the adrenaline must have worn off a while ago, but she still looked like she wanted to jump out of her seat for some reason.

“Ya shouldn't have risked your life like that,” he finally whispered, his tone a little harsher than he had originally intended, but the panic he had felt when he had been watching her helplessly was finally returning to him. “I could'a taken the beating. Ya didn't have to intervene and put yourself in danger.”

He could feel Beth's eyes on him as he reached out for the alcohol that Abraham had brought him to clean Beth's wound. Wetting a clean strip of fabric with it, he pressed it against Beth's wrist and she let out a small hiss at the burning sensation that he too was familiar with.

“Fuck, Beth,” he grumbled lowly, glancing up at her, reaching out without thinking. She was still staring at him intently, looking as if her mind was a thousand miles away but at the same time present. He cupped her cheek – the one that John had smacked – without thinking and watched as she worried her lower lip between her teeth. There were so many things that he wanted to tell her: How sorry he was for putting her in danger again, how much he hated himself for causing her pain once more, how much he loved her. “Ya should go an' clean up,” he told her instead. “Everyone's okay.”

He started to stand up slowly, still feeling as sore as before, but as soon as he did, her small hand grasped him around his wrist and she pulled him back down to sit. She looked at him intently as her eyebrows furrowed together before she leaned just a little bit closer. He felt her lips ghosting the shell of his ear, her hot breath making the hairs on his arms raise as she gripped his wrist tighter.

“Meet me in my room in ten minutes,” she whispered to him, as if she was worried that someone might overhear, despite the fact that they were alone. With those words, she pulled back and stood, not looking at him even once as she went into the house again. Daryl watched her leave, feeling that painful tightness in his chest again. Why did she want to see him in her room? What was so important that they wouldn't be able to talk about it out here, in the open?

It didn't matter though, because Daryl already knew what he would need to do by the end of the day.

And it would hurt like hell.

* * *

 

Beth hurried up the stairs and into the house, not being able to look at Daryl as she did. Hearing him talk like that – like he wasn't worth saving – made her feel sick. How could that incredible man tell _her_ that she shouldn't have risked her life for him? She knew that they needed to talk, but he was right about her needing to clean up too. The blood on skin had already crusted by now and she needed to wash herself. Maggie had tried to tell her that she needed to be checked out for injuries, but besides her wrist, Beth had known that she wasn't injured. The only thing she had been able to do after all those men had been killed was do a head-count of her family, over and over again. Even as she had begun hauling the bodies onto the truck and Morgan and Daryl had been taken inside along with Sasha, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about Daryl being beaten up in front of her and Morgan laying in a pool of his own blood. Abraham and Rick had tried talking to her too, telling her that Morgan would be fine, but there was something in Beth's heart that just wouldn't let her relax again.

She grabbed some clean clothes in her room as fast as she could, passing Michonne in the hallway as she entered the bathroom without even looking at the woman. Her heart was pounding in her chest and her throat felt thicker than it ever had. She wasn't injured physically, but everything that had happened today had made her feel _weakened._

Turning on the water, she showered quickly, the water cold against her skin since no one had had time yet to put some firewood into the pan in the basement. She washed herself quickly, observing as the water turned pink beneath her as she scrubbed away the blood from her skin. As soon as she was finished, she put on her clean clothes before taking her ruined pajamas and placing them in a plastic bag to throw out. She didn't want them anymore and she had a spare anyway, so she didn't want to have to deal with any reminder of the things that had occurred today.

When Beth finally returned to her bedroom, Daryl was already there, standing awkwardly with his back to the wall, waiting for her. For a moment, she paused and looked at him. When a solid minute had passed, she locked her door, walked over to her closet and quickly took out her emergency backpack.

“Take off your shirt,” she told him with her back still turned toward him. She turned to look at him only to see him hesitating and she couldn't resist the urge to roll her eyes at him this time. Holding up her own medical kit, she showed it to him. “I need to look over your injuries properly. I know that Eugene and Rick only looked over you quickly,” she explained.

Daryl seemed to contemplate it and Beth noticed how his eyes moved to her now locked door before he finally nodded. Her eyes stayed connected with his as he slowly removed his shirt, only wincing visibly once. Beth's eyes moved to his chest as soon as he had placed the soiled shirt on her chair, still standing there, looking at her and she cringed when she noticed a large bruise forming by his ribs as well as a cut on his bicep which she didn't know the source of. She guessed that one of the men must have used something sharp to beat him with, but her memories were a little blurry.

She walked over to him and put her hand on his chest, gently pushing him down on her bed. There was a look of protest on his face, but Beth didn't care about his pants being dirty right now. She needed to look him over and make sure that he was still alive and that he would _stay_ alive, all on her own.

She began by wiping away the dirt from his body with the spare towel she always kept in her room, using water from a water bottle to wet it. Her hands were moving methodically over his skin, looking for a sign of more injuries, but other than looking beaten up, he seemed to be fine.

“When we ran outside,” she began, her voice shaky as she used a ball of cotton to clean the small cut on his bicep, “and I saw those men and our people kneeling... Morgan–” She cut herself off, feeling her throat close up. Her lips pressed together and she just couldn't look at him then. “I thought he– I thought he might have died, or that he was going to and then all I could think about was getting you and everyone else out of there.”

“Beth...” Daryl began, but trailed off when she shook her head sharply.

“Can you please just let me say this? I need to say it,” she pleaded, glancing up at him. He gave her a small nod and she swallowed again. “When that man ordered those others to hit you, I thought I would lose you and I panicked. You told me that I shouldn't have risked my life like that, but Daryl, I _knew_ what I was doing and it was worth it because I _needed_ to keep you safe.”

She looked at his face and the bruises that were forming there. One of his eyes was swollen and turning purple, and his lower lip had a small cut in it. Picking up another cotton ball, she wet it and then wiped away the blood on his lip slowly, all while cupping his other cheek. “I'm tired of losing people, Daryl,” she murmured, her eyes meeting his. “I don't want to lose you too.”

Putting the cotton ball down, she took his hand in hers, still keeping her other one pressed to his cheek. His hand tightened around hers and for a second, she thought that he might have leaned in just a little because he appeared to be so much closer suddenly. The air felt a little thicker then and her skin felt as if it was on fire, despite the cold shower that she'd had mere minutes ago. Her confession about not wanting to lose him made her feel more raw than ever. She wasn't used to just putting things out there like that and even though she knew that Daryl must feel the same for her, she needed him to say something.

“If that's what ya really want,” he began, his voice rough, “ya shouldn't get attached to me.”

The spell was broken and Beth's mouth fell open as Daryl let go of her hand and stood from the bed, moving toward her closet where he had left a spare shirt of his a couple of nights ago.

“What?” Beth frowned, not really understanding how he could be saying such a thing. Didn't he know that she _clearly_ already _was_ attached to him? She _needed_ him.

“I'll be gone one day,” Daryl said, as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

“ _Stop_ ,” Beth protested, standing up from the bed as she took two steps toward him, reaching out to put her hand on his arm. She froze when he flinched away from her, her hand remaining in mid-air.

“This needs to stop, Beth,” he told her then. “This can't keep going on.”

Beth's stomach dropped as her stare quickly turned into a glare, her eyes narrowing. “Come again?” she bit out. “And please look me in the eyes and repeat those words to me, if you can.”

She was challenging him, but he was pushing her buttons, probably without meaning to. How could he tell her that things between them needed to stop?

“This needs to stop,” Daryl repeated, this time looking her dead in the eyes, keeping his face impassive.

She stared at him and gritted her teeth, hands balling up into fists as both anger and frustration rippled through her. “I don't even know what _this_ is, Daryl!” she exclaimed frustratedly. She wanted to push him and yell at him, but she didn't want to injure him further by doing so. Still, it didn't change the fact that he was pissing her off by belittling whatever it was that had been happening between them these past couple of weeks, and for what? She couldn't see what purpose pushing her away had now when she had already developed feelings for him.

“It's _nothing._ ”

Once again, Beth stared, her mouth dropping open as something inside of her chest seemed to snap. Daryl was still looking her in the eyes and she _saw._ She saw how something in his eyes flickered when he'd said those hurtful words; how for a brief second, he had regretted them. But then, his mask of impassiveness returned to his face and he finished buttoning up his shirt, grabbing his old and bloodied one off the chair before walking to the door. Beth found that she was unable to do anything when he unlocked it and stepped outside, closing it behind him quietly, even though her brain made it sound like a _slam_. Her heartbeat was still going strong, but her breathing came out more shallowly as her eyes began stinging. She hurried to the door and locked it before pressing her back against it, palms flat against the wood as she tried to gather herself.

She slid to the floor as soon as the first few tears fell down her cheeks and her sobs shook her body.

* * *

D aryl stared at the ceiling in his room. He couldn't sleep and he knew that it was his own  damn fault for having gotten used to sleeping next to Beth.  His body was aching in every way possible. He was still sore from the beating he had gotten the day before and he hadn't even be able to twist and turn during the night, like he had wanted to do because he had been so restless. Instead, he had simply laid on his back and tapped his fingers against his stomach, trying to think about anything other than the blonde beauty, whose heart he might have broken.

' _I don't even know what_ this _is, Daryl!_ '

Her words kept echoing in his mind. He couldn't get the look on her face out of his mind. She had looked just as he had felt, deep down: heartbroken and angry.

' _I don't even know what_ this _is.'_

He knew he had made the right decision though. When it came to him choosing his happiness or her safety, she would always come first. He had already lost her once before and he wouldn't survive it if he lost her again. The memories of her being shot in the hospital had come back to him the very second he had seen her bury her knife in John's throat. He had seen blood and the only thing he had been able to think about was how _her_ blood had tasted coppery and bitter in his mouth when it had sprayed his face at Grady. There had been too many similarities with what had happened the day before and the only thing he kept thinking back to was those months that his family had later spent on the road without her. Images of her burial, Maggie's crying, his own heartbreak and self-harm in an attempt to actually _feel_ something instead of being an empty shell of nothing – all came crashing down on him, settling like an unpleasant knot in his stomach.

Daryl knew that he couldn't go through it again. But then again, it wasn't even about him now because it was always about _her_. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if Beth had died again and the fact that she had been willing to risk her life, for _him_ , made the reality of his feelings for her more frightening than ever.

It was no longer a question about whether or not he loved her. He did, with all his heart. With that love though, now knew that he hadn't been thinking clearly for months. How could he have given in and allowed himself to grow close to her again? How could he have let her become attached to him? It was as if he had just thrown away the gift of a fresh start that she had been given and gotten himself all tangled up in her again. He was messed up and he would have once again been the reason that she got killed.

' _I don't even know what this is._ '

He knew what _it_ had been. He had fallen for her again and maybe, just maybe, she had begun falling for him too. It still didn't change what had happened though. He would always put her before himself and everyone else. If he needed to be an asshole to her and push her away after everything they had been through, so be it.

He just knew that he couldn't live with himself if he once again became the reason for Beth's demise.

* * *

Beth watched in silence as Morgan slept. She had been up all night long; firstly because she hadn't been able to sleep after his fight with Daryl and secondly because she had gone downstairs to watch the man she saw as a father, so that he wouldn't slip away from her during the night.

On her way down the stairs she had come across Maggie, who had known better than to stop her from seeing Morgan. Beth had no doubt that her sister had seen the evidence of her crying, but thankfully Maggie hadn't asked her about it. The only thing her sister had said was that Rick had decided to hold a group meeting a little later that day – _today_ – to talk about the things that had happened and to decide what their next move should be. There was no doubt that they had only gotten lucky this time around. Beth had had no way of knowing for sure when the rest of the group would be returning and she'd just kept telling herself that if she held John and his group distracted long enough, Rick and the others might return.

She knew that Michonne and Abraham had been the ones to spot the tire tracks and they had told the rest of the group to stand back and park their vehicles further away from the house. They had gotten their weapons out and ready for anything and when they had gotten close enough, they had seen Beth and the others kneeling on the ground. Beth had spotted Michonne, but she had remained quiet as she had worked the knife she had hidden in her boot out from its sheath and cut loose the zip-tie that had her tied up. Making her move on John had been the only thing that had made sense then because she had sworn that she would kill him. She wanted to be the one to end his life and the thought of the person she had become to protect her family, scared her more than it surprised her. There had been no question on whether or not she should put herself in danger to give the others a chance. She had put them first because she knew that she couldn't lose them.

Maggie had told her that she had been with Morgan for most of the night and that he had woken up once, asking for Beth. According to her sister, Morgan was going to recover perfectly well within a couple of days and Beth was glad for that. She didn't know what she would have done if she had lost him like she had lost Noah. She didn't know how she would have kept going and the mere thought of losing someone in her family... She hadn't been able to keep it in so she had told Daryl how scared she had been for him and then she had ruined everything that they had been building.

Beth had wanted nothing more than to just tell him that she knew that he had been lying to her since that first day in the woods when she had followed him and saved his life. She wanted to tell him that she knew that he cared about her and that he was scared, but she hadn't been able to say anything when he had told her that the thing between them was _nothing_.

A part of her told her that he had just been scared and that he had said those hurtful words because he wanted to push her away for her own safety – Or at least what he thought was her own safety. She knew that Daryl was a protector in every way and that he put her and the rest of his family's life above his own. That much was clear from the way he had lectured her on putting herself in danger for him. The thing was that she just didn't know whether Daryl understood the extent of her feelings for him. He was a part of her family, yes, but the thing between them meant something _more_ to her.

And he had reduced it to _nothing_.

The other part of her, the part that had been keeping her awake all night long, made her wonder whether she had just gotten so twisted up and tangled in her own emotions for the man that she had imagined him ever having deeper feelings for her. Maybe he hadn't meant the same thing that she had when she had told him that she felt with him? Perhaps it was all just her mind playing tricks on her heart, making her believe what she wanted to believe?

She had begun to fall so deeply for the hunter that she had even gone as far as to imagine that _she_ might have been the girl that he had loved so deeply, once upon a time. It hurt her to admit to herself that she had been wrong about everything. There was a high possibility that Daryl only cared for her as a part of their group and that he was still very much in love with the girl that he had lost. Then again, those early mornings, when she would wake up with her back pressed against his front, it wasn't just the physical evidence of his attraction to her that made her believe that he cared for her. It was the way that she would find him looking at her when she turned in his arms and faced him. It was the way that his grip on her hips tightened just a little and he looked like he wanted to confess something to her, but always managed to keep himself from saying anything. It was the way that he talked to her softly, as if he was afraid that each morning that they woke up next to each other could be the last because she would push him away.

There was just something there that she couldn't explain. Something he was doing his best to keep hidden from her, even though she knew she should have it all figured out already.

Beth looked at Morgan again and then over at the bed where Sasha had been sleeping before being moved to the living room so that she could join in on the meeting. They hadn't been sure if Morgan would be ready to be at the gathering considering that he had taken a strong hit to the head and was still struggling to stay awake for longer periods of time. Eugene had told Maggie that he probably just needed to sleep the pain off though and Beth had decided that she would hope that that was all there was to it.

She felt Morgan's hand twitching under hers and her eyes moved to the older man's face. His eyes slowly fluttered open and Beth found herself holding her breath, not knowing what to expect. The hand she wasn't using to hold on to Morgan's automatically moved down to her thigh, where she had decided to keep her knives strapped since the whole John-ordeal. Morgan's eyes opened fully and zeroed in on her face. She watched as his mouth twitched and he let out a low rasp before coughing wildly. Hurriedly, she reached for the glass of water that Maggie had left on the nightstand and helped him to a sip.

Morgan took a big breath and once again focused on her face before smiling. “Thank you, lil' Lady,” he said, his voice still a little rough.

Beth felt her throat close up and tears spring to her eyes. She lowered her head, resting it on Morgan's bed as she clutched his hand in hers again before her shoulders began shaking.

“Lady? What's wrong?” Morgan asked her as she cried, his hand resting on the back of her head, gently stroking her golden locks. “What's this all about?” he questioned again when Beth turned her face toward him so that she could look at him, for the first time allowing him to see her face fully as she cried. Usually, when she broke down like this, she covered herself up and he allowed her to out of respect. This was uncharted territory even for them.

Beth could only shake her head and clutch his hand tighter, not wanting to tell him the reason for her tears. The mere thought that she had been preparing to put down the man she saw as a father saddened her to no extent, but that wasn't all. Days and weeks of holding herself together came crashing down on her as she imagined all the things that could have gone wrong.

“Come here,” Morgan said, slowly moving to the side so that she could lay down next to him. Beth laid her head on his chest and listened to his strong heartbeat, still holding his hand as she let herself just cry. The ache in her chest had finally become too much and she needed to let it out.

After all, it _wasn't_ nothing.

* * *

Daryl walked slowly toward the living room, Carol following him close behind.

“Don't need ya to hover,” he told her, shooting her a side-glance but she merely smirked at him.

“What did I tell you about friends taking care of each other?” she countered, reminding him of that conversation on the porch that they had had months ago. It felt like it had been years since that night though, but he remembered every word of their conversation. Not wanting to respond he just offered her a weak smirk before entering the room where Rick would be holding the meeting.

Glenn had visited him in his room and told him about the gathering, but the younger man had also told him that Daryl didn't need to come if he still wasn't feeling well. Truth be told, Daryl's entire body was still aching, but he knew that within a few days, he should be back to normal again. He could already guess what the meeting would be about though, since everyone was there.

Everyone besides Morgan and Beth.

Daryl hadn't meant to look for her straight away, although it seemed like his brain had become hardwired to do so whenever he entered a room in the house.

Rick was standing close to Michonne, who had her arm around Carl's shoulder. The kid was holding little Judith who was playing with a stuffed animal, innocent as always. Daryl almost shuddered at the thought of how close they had come to losing her during the attack. He was certain that his brother, Rick, wouldn't have been able to have handled it, but then again, who would?

Sasha was sitting in the armchair, Tyreese by her side and Eugene, Tara, Maggie and Glenn were all sitting on the couch. Carol remained by Daryl's side as he leaned back against the wall next to Abraham and Rosita, who also stood joined. This was the kind of day that Daryl felt grateful for having Carol with him. The woman had grown to mean more to him than most women he had had in his life before the world had ended so abruptly. He saw her as someone he could trust and rely on, despite the fact that she too had made some poor choices in the past. No one was perfect now and no one had been before. He was certain that the only ones who were still innocent, were the younger children, such as little Judith. Carl had gotten back some of what Daryl had first seen in the camp outside of Atlanta when they had found Beth again and started living on the farm. In a way, Daryl thought that it might also have had to do with the kid knowing that his sister had a safe place to grow up in and that that was the reason that he had allowed himself to relax back a little and not be on alert constantly. Now, Daryl could see that Carl had a more serious look on his face again because the safe home they had had been compromised yet again.

He heard footsteps and he forced himself to look down at the floor.

“We're here,” he heard Beth say and then he heard how she and Morgan moved to the other side of the room slowly. Daring himself to glance up at her, he noticed that Morgan was leaning on her a little but before he could give into his instinct to help, Abraham had already moved to stand by their side and help keep Morgan upright. Clearly, the man was still weakened and couldn't stand properly on his own. Beth looked at Abraham gratefully before turning her head and looking around the room. Briefly, her eyes connected with his and his gut wrenched at the sight of her red-rimmed eyes. She had been crying and he was sure that he might have been the reason for some of her pain.

He had to remind himself that it would be better this way. Hurt her now and she could live another day without having him there to factor in as someone she wanted to risk her life for. He refused to be the reason she got herself killed.

“Okay,” Rick said as he stepped in front of them all. “I think we all know the reason that we're havin' this meeting. After everythin' that happened yesterday, we need to decide if we should risk stayin' here or if we should move on to other places.”

Silence filled the room again and Daryl took a look at the others. They all seemed to be in deep thought, recalling the events that had transpired as well as thinking about the slim possibility that there could be a safer place somewhere out there.

“There have been two attacks on this place in as many months,” Glenn pointed out then. “We might have used silencers, but the other men didn't. Walkers everywhere close by could have heard the fight.”

“I'd just like to point out that before that first walker attack and the attack yesterday, we were able to live safely here on this farm,” Eugene piped up, which kind of surprised Daryl. The fake scientist – who actually was very smart – hadn't been giving his opinion on much since he had revealed that he had been lying about a cure only to save his own ass and receiving a beating from Abraham that almost resulted in his death.

“Eugene has a point,” Rosita agreed. “We've been safe here, other than those two attacks. We would have been safe if those men hadn't found us and they're gone now.”

“That first walker attack is what got Noah and Father Gabriel _killed_ ,” Glenn said. Daryl's eyes moved toward Beth's face in time to see it harden. He knew that she loathed when people mentioned Noah and Father Gabriel in the same sentence because she still saw the reverend as the reason for Noah's death. Beth's blue eyes met his again and he watched as she narrowed her eyes at him before looking away, crossing her arms over her chest.

“We stopped those fuckers before they could get many shots out,” Abraham then said. “When the herd came, it was _led_ to us by _those men_ , so there was nothin' natural about it. Either way, we handled them on our own and I'm sure that whatever comes along, we'll handle it again.”

Daryl was surprised that Abraham wanted them to stay, especially considering how the last time they had a meeting like this, he had been all for them leaving the farm behind.

“So you think we should stay then?” Rick asked and Abraham nodded.

“I think this place is worth the risk,” the man replied.

“I want to stay too,” Maggie said, making everyone look at her. Glenn turned to his wife and for the first time in a long while, he noticed that the two of them weren't agreeing on something.

“Maggie...” Glenn began, but trailed off when Maggie shook her head.

“It's okay, Glenn,” she said, looking back at the others. “I didn't wanna say anythin' yet until I knew for sure and I don't want it to be somethin' that affects your final decision, but...” Maggie placed her hand over her stomach and Daryl couldn't do anything but stare. “I'm pregnant,” Maggie announced.

Daryl heard a small gasp and he turned to look at Beth who was gaping at her older sister.

“Mags,” Beth said, taking a small step forward before she stopped and composed herself, face once again hardening. “If you're stayin', then I'm stayin' too,” she said, her voice telling everyone that she wasn't going to change her mind.

“If Beth isn't going, neither am I,” Morgan told them before smiling brightly at Maggie. “Congratulations, by the way.”

Maggie smiled back, “Thank you.” Her face became serious again a second later. “Glenn and I talked it over and he believes that there might be a better place for us somewhere out there. He's worried that when this baby comes around–” Maggie stopped herself and sent an apologetic look toward Rick, who looked down, clearly thinking about his late wife. Daryl didn't fail to notice the way that Michonne's hand went to grasp Rick's and instantly, he knew that there was indeed more going on there than they were letting on.

Maggie cleared her throat. “Glenn thinks that I might be safer for me to give birth with a real doctor present,” she explained. “That is if we actually manage to find one. I think it's better for us to stay here. Daddy taught Carol everythin' he knew, even though his knowledge was limited to animals, but how hard can it be? We have time to prepare and I agree with Abraham on this one because I think it _is_ worth the risk, and not just for me and our baby.” Maggie took Glenn's hand in hers, giving her husband an encouraging squeeze before looking back at Daryl and the others.

Yet again, everyone remained silent, contemplating.

Despite the fact that he had sworn to himself that he wouldn't be going near Beth again, Daryl knew that he too would be staying on the farm if that was her decision. He would keep watching over her, but keep her distance when he finally met Rick's eyes again, he knew that his friend too had made his own decision.

“Anyone opposed to stayin'?” Rick asked, eyes moving over them all. Daryl watched too as Glenn looked hesitantly from Maggie's face, down to her belly. He understood that the younger man must be anxious and Daryl knew that Glenn had every right to be. After what had happened to Lori, neither of them would ever again be a hundred percent sure about bringing another child into this world, but if they built the walls around the farmland a little higher and made them a little stronger, maybe they would be able to give that child the safety it deserved.

No one lifted their hand and Michonne took a step toward Rick. “Then it's decided,” she said. “We'll be staying here and making this place even safer for us all. That group of men were the reason for the lack of walkers in the area, so we might have to keep our eyes open until we secure the place more.”

“We'll also need an emergency exit plan,” Rick stated. “If we're ever caught off guard again – which I'm sure won't happen – we need to be ready.”

It seemed like the tension that had been present in the room at the start of the meeting eased away after that. Daryl observed from where he stood how Beth walked over to Maggie and embraced her sister before her hands came to rest on Maggie's still flat stomach. Daryl made sure to remind himself to talk to Rick about them planning a run for some pregnancy stuff for the older Greene sister. As the group separated slowly, everyone going back to their respective tasks of taking various inventory, recovering and cooking a late dinner, Daryl found himself standing alone in the room with Beth. He couldn't _not_ look at her so he just stood there and stared at her, expecting her to say something about how much she hated him for saying what he had said.

He had prepared for some stinging and hurtful words, but nothing could have prepared him for the pain that exploded in his chest when Beth just looked him straight in the eyes, and left the room.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Peeks out from behind chair* I'm sorry?
> 
> No but seriously guys, some of you saw this coming and really, we all know that Daryl has this thing for blaming himself and pushing Beth away. Don't worry though, there will be some angst in the next chapter, but there's also a rather funny moment actually...and it all leads to chapter 25, which is THE chapter that you don't wanna miss! :D Oh, and yes, Maggie's pregnant!
> 
> Having said that, I'm just gonna share that this story will be ending at chapter 27 and it's really been a journey. I've been thinking about taking some time to finish the chapters that are left, but school is keeping me busy too. Either way, I'm also planning on going back and making sure that everything is spell-checked and correct in former chapters because we all know how those small mistakes sneak in there, ALWAYS.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and I really hope you don't hate me too much! I'm gonna need all the reviews I can get to be motivated enough to write the next chapter sooner! *wink wink* :)
> 
> Until next time! Xx


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seven days have passed and no words have been spoken between Daryl and Beth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for taking so long to update, but I've been so very busy with everything and I've been kind of ill these past few days. Either way, I noticed that some of you were sad about this story ending so soon, but I just wanna tell you not to worry too much about it because I've kind of been planning a small sequel... Hehehe... I'll make a longer post about it on tumblr (author123456 dot tumblr dot com).
> 
> So this chapter is a little angst and nothing really gets resolved, but it's a build up for the most intense chapter I've ever written in this fic! Chapter 25 will be a major one and I'm already half-way done with it! But I want to take some days to edit it and I kind of have two more exams that I need to study for, so I hope you understand that it might take a week or so before I post anything again. :)
> 
> For now though, I hope you enjoy this one! :D

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 24

Beth combed her hair slowly, taking her time as she undid the tangles in her locks one by one. She looked herself in her mirror, noticing that the bags that had been prominent under her eyes were still there and she glowered at herself for being so weak. It wasn't a physical weakness as much as it was an emotional one. During all the time that she could remember, she had never once felt as drained as she had felt this past week.

Seven days had passed since she and Daryl had argued. _Seven_ whole days that the two of them hadn't spoken a single word to each other. Today would be the eight and Beth couldn't see anything changing between them which in turn made her feel awful. At night, she barely slept because she had gotten so used to his presence and during the day, she would do everything in her power to keep herself distracted and as far away from Daryl as possible.

He seemed to be having the same idea because after recovering enough to be able to move without wincing due to his bruised ribs, he had gone to the far wall and worked with Abraham, Tyreese, Rick and Morgan to figure out how to make the barrier more secure. Every day, he would be out there and every day, Beth would stick close to the house. They no longer sat together during dinner and Daryl always ate as quickly as he could, all so that he could get away from her, it seemed.

To say that Beth was pissed would be the understatement of the year.

She was angry with Daryl for the way he had pushed her away, but she was even angrier with herself for not confronting him about the things she had learned from Rick and Michonne a while back. It frustrated her to no end when she would feel his eyes on her in passing and it made her feel even worse to know that she too glanced his way whenever she had the chance and didn't think he would notice.

If the rest of their group noticed the change between them – which they most definitely had because Beth knew for a fact that no one in her family was stupid – no one said anything about it. Morgan hadn't even tried to talk to her about it, but she knew that the man was struggling not to after having seen her break down a week before. Instead of asking Beth and Daryl about what had changed between them, the group had instead begun making plans for Maggie's pregnancy.

If everything went smoothly there would be a new child with them in about seven or eight months. Maggie hadn't known for sure, but she had been suspecting it for a week or two. That was why she had wanted to go on the longer run: So that she could find herself a pregnancy test and make sure. Fortunately for her, she had found a bunch of them in an almost completely untouched pharmacy and after the attack, the first thing she had done that night, she had taken two and both of them had come back being positive.

Beth was happy for her sister because it seemed as if it had been something that Maggie had been wanting for a while, but never quite dared to hope about. Her sister shared a story with her a few nights ago about when she had thought she might be pregnant while they had been staying at the prison, but how it had turned out that she wasn't. Beth had listened intently to Maggie's story, although a part of her wanted to ask her what had happened _after_ the prison. She knew that Maggie probably didn't know more than she did, yet she figured that at least her sister might have heard something from someone who knew. On the other hand, she didn't want to be the one to open up the conversation regarding her and Daryl. She knew that it would inevitably lead to the question on what Beth felt for the man and at the moment she was so pissed at him that she was sure that she would say something stupid.

Even though Beth was thrilled for her sister's pregnancy, there was a part of her that couldn't help but be worried. Yes, the farm was hopefully safe again and they would be making the walls higher and more secure, but it didn't change the fact that it was very risky to be carrying a child in this world. Beth nights seemed to be filled with nightmares about Maggie having a miscarriage and the almost fully developed baby killing her sister from the inside. The nightmare turned even worse when Beth was forced to not only put down her sister but also the baby who looked like a perfect combination of her and Glenn.

Glenn had been at the head of planning how everything should be secured and prepared for the baby and Maggie. No one questioned his need to protect the woman he loved and the child that they had made and it seemed as though his previous doubt about staying at the farm had gone away. Beth understood him though because she too had had the same worries. She kept thinking about the fact that them building higher walls would make other people want to get inside them even more. Walkers would probably just brush by them from time to time, but no one knew what would happen if another herd came along. Beth was thinking about suggesting that they find bricks and cement or anything really to just _build_ something stronger. Also, with Glenn and Maggie extending the family, they would without a doubt need to figure out how they were all going to fit in the farmhouse if anyone else got pregnant or when the kid's grew up. Beth suspected that Carl would like to have his own room pretty soon and Judith was growing up as well. Even though the farmhouse was big enough for them all now, they would eventually need to either build a cabin or something on the land, or turn the barn into something that was actually livable in. Briefly, Beth's mind went to the cabin in the woods that she and Morgan had secured all those months ago, but she didn't develop the though further considering that she was sure no one would want to stay so far away from the others unless they knew that it really was safe.

Maggie and her unborn child weren't the only people plaguing her nightmares though. It seemed like Beth's brain had hardwired itself to make her re-live the day of the attack over and over again. If she wasn't dreaming about having to kill her sister, she was seeing Morgan laying on the ground, _dead_ instead of just unconscious with his head bashed in. Morgan's body would change after a moment though and turn into Daryl's corpse which slowly rose from the ground and made it's way toward her. The nightmare ended differently every other night. One night she would be the one to kill Daryl – forced to do so before the walker that he had become could kill her too – and the next she wouldn't be able to go through with it because the corpse would look her in the eyes and break her heart all over again when she saw the empty blue hue in them.

Those two nightmares were the ones that always returned to her: The one with Maggie dying and Daryl being dead. But there was also a third one that consisted of Beth being forced to watch as John tortured Daryl in front of her.

For some reason, Beth found herself always jumping awake when she had that particular one. She always reached out, as if hoping to find Daryl behind her, safe and sound, but then the cold realization of their argument would hit her like a ton of bricks and she would lay back down, breathless and upset. She would imagine what her life would be like if Daryl was no longer in it and her heart would clench in the most painful way. Now that she had been reunited with her family, with _him_ , she couldn't imagine going a single day without them, without _him_.

He had downplayed the feelings that were growing between them to being _nothing_ and she was just so angry at herself for not being able to let it go. She didn't want to lose this thing that had blossomed between them and she knew that it wasn't nothing. It was something that made her feel good and happy and she wanted it to go on forever. Instead, Daryl had decided to call it quits before they even talked it over and because of that, she allowed herself to stay angry with him. Still, she cursed herself internally each and every time that her heart fluttered in her chest when she saw him from the corner of her eyes. Her feelings for him wouldn't just magically disappear and she knew for sure that even though he had become a master at avoiding her, he still felt something for her, whether he wanted to deny it or not.

Beth placed her brush back on her table and stared at the blonde strands that were now untangled. She sighed to herself, putting her hair up in a pony tail, silently wishing that her life could be untangled as easily as her hair.

* * *

Daryl stared out in the darkness. His crossbow was placed between his legs while he used his hunting knife to cut into one of the wooden boards on the porch. He was refusing to look at Michonne, who he just _knew_ was observing him. She had been watching him ever since the two of them had gone out to keep watch after all.

It had been a long day and Daryl had worked hard on the outer wall. It seemed like they would be finishing up in a couple of days, which he honestly didn't know if he was looking forward to. Not being able to work on the wall meant that he would surely have to face Beth and he didn't think he could do that.

The two of them hadn't been speaking for over a week now and today seemed to have been one of the most difficult days for him since the beginning of their silent treatment to each other. There had just been something about her when his eyes had sought her out when he had come back to the house. She hadn't been looking at him, but he had been able to see the way her muscles had tensed, as if she had sensed that he was close by. He hated himself for destroying everything that had been between them, but he couldn't risk losing her again. She would move on eventually and in one way or another, he was certain that she would find happiness.

A part of him told him that it was an absurd thought because Beth wouldn't exactly go out of her way to search the Earth for a guy her own age and he was fairly certain that that same part of him would probably beat the poor fella up for even looking at Beth. He had done this to himself though and _for her_ so that he could keep her safe. Everyone he loved died eventually and he had spent seven long months mourning her before he had found her again, so he knew _exactly_ what he didn't want to feel again. Those seven months, he had been ready to just give up. He hadn't wanted to go on and the only reason he had pulled through had been because he had wanted to help Rick and the others, because he felt as if he somehow _owed_ them something for fucking everything up.

Daryl could feel his eyes stinging again and he inhaled a small breath through his nose, hoping that Michonne wouldn't sense that something was off with him again. He knew that he barely slept during the night and that he worked himself close to exhaustion during the day. The mere two or three hours of sleep that he got before he joined Michonne for watch were plagued with thoughts and dreams of Beth that he wished he could somehow shake out of his mind. He would wake up each and every time, reaching out for her only to find that he was alone in bed. For a moment, he would panic before he remembered that the days of the two of them sleeping in the same bed were over because of him.

“You wanna talk about it?” Michonne asked, her voice so low that he had barely heard her. He bit the inside of his cheek, not knowing whether he should respond or not. He had never particularly liked it when people got involved in his business, but Michonne was his friend and he knew that she – just like everyone else – had been giving him and Beth time to figure out their issues for themselves. Maybe Michonne had simply gotten tired of not saying anything.

“Nah,” Daryl drawled, shaking his head. “There's nothin' to talk 'bout.” He could feel Michonne's hard stare boring into him but he just couldn't look at her. Instead, he continued scraping against the wood with his knife.

“So that's it then?” Michonne wondered. “All those months, all that _pain_ and it's over, just like that?”

Daryl looked over at her finally, narrowing his eyes at her. “There was never anythin' there.”

“Does she know about your tattoo then?” Michonne hissed at him, disappointment shining through her eyes. “Does she know that it's for her? That you were a dead man walking around, only surviving before you found her again?”

Daryl watched the woman in front of him. She rarely spoke about things like these but when she did, she made sure that she knew what she was saying. The irritation in her eyes made him look away from her again though and suddenly he felt ashamed of himself for not telling Beth the entire truth.

“I'm protectin' her, Michonne,” he bit out, voice low so that Michonne wouldn't detect the shakiness in it. “I can't watch her die again.”

“What makes you think that she'll die?” Michonne frowned. “She was shot in the head and she survived.”

“She was fuckin' _lucky_ with that one,” Daryl said. “I can't lose her again.”

“You _are_ losing her if you're letting her go,” Michonne told him sternly. “I told myself that I wouldn't say anything. We've all been watching the two of you ignoring each other for the past week and we thought that it would be better to let you settle your issues alone.”

“Why're you lecturin' me then?” Daryl snorted. “Not doin' such a good job at lettin' us be.”

“I'm saying all of this because I don't think you realize what a fool you're being if you really think that that young woman can't protect herself,” Michonne said, eyes still narrowed. “You're being stupid, Dixon and as your friend, it's my job to inform you of it before you make the biggest mistake of your life and _really_ lose her.”

With those words, Michonne stood from where she had been sitting next to him and muttered something about going to get Tyreese and Glenn to relieve them from their watch duty. Daryl sat alone for a while, thinking about the things that Michonne had said to him and when finally Tyreese and Glenn came to take over the night watch, he muttered a good night to them before walking back inside. Michonne was nowhere to be seen and for that he was thankful since he found himself walking toward his room with his head lowered like a kid who had just been scolded for doing something bad.

Soon he stopped walking and turned to his left, looking at Beth's closed door. He took a small step toward it, wondering what she would do if he just walked inside and apologized and told her that he couldn't keep living like this; that he couldn't go on if she hated him. Never before had he longed so much to go inside and see her, just lay eyes on her for a second so that she would somehow magically _know_ and understand why he was doing this to her; to them both. Although he knew that he still firmly believed what he had told Michonne. He was doing the right thing for Beth and that was the only thing that was important to him. No matter how much he wanted to go into her room and beg her to forgive him, her safety would always come first and she deserved so much more and so much better than him.

That was the only thought that finally made Daryl turn his back on Beth's door and walk into his own room, only to lay in bed in yet another sleepless night.

* * *

“You know, you should warn people before you throw a knife at them,” Glenn stated, looking at Beth with wide eyes. Beth eyed her knife that was sticking out of a tree, mere inches from Glenn's face.

“I didn't know it was you,” Beth said, offering only that as an apology. “What are you doing here?”

She watched as Glenn retrieved her throwing knife and walked toward her. Beth had opted for training closer to the woods this day, needing to get away from everyone and everything so that she could just clear her head.

“Maggie asked me to come check on you,” Glenn said. “And I wanted to see if you were doing okay.”

Beth frowned at him, “Why shouldn't I be okay?”

Glenn handed her her knife back and she took it from his hand, looking at him expectantly.

“It's not exactly a secret that you and Daryl have been fighting,” Glenn stated. “I wanted to see how you were. You've been very distant.”

“Daryl and I aren't anyone's business,” Beth stated calmly. “And I'm _fine_.” She threw her knife, missing by several inches this time. She glared at it angrily as it fell to the ground, embedding itself in the dirt instead of the tree that she had been aiming for.

“Okay,” Glenn shifted next to her. “Since you're fine I can tell you that Maggie and I are too now.”

“I know that you've accepted the fact that Maggie wants to stay here on the farm,” Beth told him, glancing his way. “I've known for days, Glenn.”

“Hear me out then,” Glenn sighed. “The reason that I didn't want to stay here to begin with was because I was so afraid of losing Maggie that I just wanted to get away from this place. I couldn't see a single way that our baby and Maggie would both be safe if she gave birth here and all I wanted was to get her out of here.”

“We're safe now, Glenn,” Beth stated. She didn't think there would be any other threats than the dead right now and unless a herd of a thousand walkers came their way, they would surely be fine.

“I know that,” Glenn said. “My point is that I was scared of losing her and it blinded me. I couldn't see the potential she still saw in this place or what she wanted because the only thing I could think about was keeping her safe.” Glenn paused briefly, looking at Beth. She watched him, waiting for him to say whatever it was that he wanted to say. “I think that you might be in the same position with Daryl,” Glenn finally stated.

And there it was.

“Daryl and I aren't seeing eye to eye on something,” Beth admitted, not seeing a point in denying it since she was sure that everyone already knew anyway. “He's the one who's pushing me away though.”

“That's the thing about Daryl though,” Glenn said. “He tries to protect the people he cares about by pushing them away and that's what he's doing to you.”

Beth turned to look at him sharply. “If Daryl cared about me at all, he wouldn't be pushing me away so easily,” she said, hating the fact that the bitterness was so clear in her voice.

Glenn's mouth twitched and Beth felt the urge to actually smack him for almost smiling at her. She stared at him as he shook his head. “ _Daryl_ ,” Glenn began, “had been struggling for days to stay away from you. This is probably one of the most difficult things he's ever done and if you haven't seen that – Which I totally understand by the way that you have been avoiding him too, by the way. – you've been blind.”

Beth remained quiet as she tried to think back at the few times that she and Daryl had shared eye-contact over the past week. Her heart had always felt as if someone was twisting a knife inside of it and if she were to be honest, the look that she would see on Daryl's face before looking away told her that he must at least feel that same kind of pain. But why would he keep pushing her away? Didn't he know that she was capable of taking care of herself?

She had survived so much already and she wasn't just another dead girl–

_Just another dead girl_.

Something inside of Beth's brain stirred at the words, telling her that she had heard them once or maybe even spoken them herself. She tried to think about it and find that lost memory among the others but it was as if it slipped right through her fingers before she could grab and hold on to it.

“Let's go back to the house, Beth,” Glenn said after a moment.

Beth nodded absentmindedly, being so lost in her thoughts that she just retrieved her knife from the ground before following Glenn back up to the house. She didn't know what to say to Glenn but she figured that he didn't need her to say anything else because when she met his eyes before entering the house, she knew that her gratitude for him being blunt and honest with her had shined through. In the kitchen, Beth found Maggie and Carol. Carol was cutting some meat while Maggie pealed potatoes. Both women glanced up when Beth entered the room.

“Beth,” Maggie breathed out, her cheeks rosy as a happy smile spread across her face. “Why don't you come sit with us?”

“I need to wash up,” Beth told her, feeling sweaty and dirty after being out throwing knives all morning.

“Oh come on,” Carol smiled at her. “Five minutes won't kill you.”

Beth found herself giving in. She tugged on her knife holster that was strapped around her thigh and walked over to the kitchen table, sitting down. Maggie and Carol went back to working on their respective tasks to prepare dinner.

A couple of minutes passed and Beth opened her mouth suddenly, “Were you scared when you found out that you were pregnant?”

Instantly, Maggie and Carol both stopped working, turning to look at her. Beth sat with her chin popped up in her hand, half-leaning over the table as she looked at her sister expectantly. They had never really talked about her pregnancy like this.

“I guess I was nervous,” Maggie admitted. “Still am.”

Beth wanted to tell her that she should be, but she didn't want to trigger her own nightmares about her sister and her unborn child.

“It wasn't exactly planned,” Maggie said slowly. “When we were on the road, before we found you, my period was kind of all over the place... We didn't think much about being careful back then and I guess that after we found you here on the farm and I wasn't as stressed anymore, my period became more regular again, but we'd kind of stopped thinking about it by then,” Maggie explained, sounding almost sheepish. “I guess Daddy would've had a lot to say about that now.”

“Maggie, Hershel would have been happy for you and Glenn,” Carol said, placing a hand on Maggie's shoulder. “I'm sure he would have been proud of both of his girls and the wonderful women they have become.”

Beth couldn't help but smile back at Carol's kind words. The older woman certainly knew how to make someone feel better.

“I'm going to refuse to call my niece or nephew a mistake though, so I'll just call him or her a happy surprise,” Beth told Maggie, who grinned back at her.

“A happy surprise,” Maggie repeated. “I like that.”

Beth nodded at her sister and Carol before standing up, excusing herself to finally go and get cleaned up. As she walked upstairs and got her things, she couldn't help but think about her own period and when the last time she'd had it had been. She was sure that it must have been about two months ago or so, but she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she hadn't been very regular since she had met Morgan.

Beth's cheeks were flushed when she looked herself in the mirror and recalled that uncomfortable time that Morgan had thought that she was injured because she had bled through her pants. She had been so embarrassed because she hadn't been able to explain to him what had happened because she hadn't gotten her voice back, so she had just taken a tampon and thrown it at him. Morgan had blinked a few times before picking it up and Beth had been mortified by her own actions until Morgan simply smiled, telling her that he understood now. The next morning she had woken up to find that he had brought her a candy bar that he had found in the small town that they had been staying in and she had just _known_ that she could depend on the man. Now, that awkward first time acknowledging the fact that Beth had the same monthly issues as any other woman was something that Beth laughed about when she was alone. Still, a blush always crept up her cheeks when she remembered that initial mortification.

Beth stepped into the shower as she began mentally counting the days since she'd last bled but soon enough, her thoughts instead drifted to the conversation that she'd had with Glenn and yet again, she found herself thinking about the hunter who was breaking her heart.

* * *

Daryl placed a can of conserved peaches into his backpack along with some leftover stew from a night ago. Carol had put it in a lunch box for him and then wrapped it up in a plastic bag so that it wouldn't ruin his backpack if it accidentally broke. He checked his bolts one by one again, taking his time with making sure that they were all strong so that he wouldn't find himself in trouble out in the woods. He was going on a hunt alone for the first time in months and it would be the first time he would be going out alone at all since the attack when he had been injured. He was tired of people always hovering but at the same time keeping their distance because they knew how he was and after the words that Michonne had thrown at him the night before, Daryl knew that he needed some time to think.

Most of all, he needed some time to clear his head and wrap his mind around everything that had been happening since they had found Beth again. If anything, he needed to make up his damn mind about the girl because trying to keep her safe while pining after her at the same time wasn't something he was enjoying very much. If Merle had been alive now he would without a doubt had tried to knock some sense into him by now, telling him that Dixon's didn't pine after no one. Surprisingly enough, even the Merle that Daryl had inside of mind seemed to be angry with him and giving him the silent treatment, like Beth was. Daryl figured that it was actually his subconscious mind or some psychological shit that didn't agree with what he had made himself do, but he didn't want to think about _that_ now.

All he wanted was to go out, shoot a deer or something and bring it back so that they could store it for the Winter. They would all need the meat and Daryl knew that soon enough the smaller animals would be hiding away from the cold which meant that he needed to be quick to fill that little shed that they had built to store the meat. Eugene had even managed to get a cooler that they had found to work, which meant that they would be able to store it even better now.

Daryl heard two pair of unmistakable footsteps approaching him, but he didn't look up at Rick and Morgan as they came to stand by his side.

“You really shouldn't be going off alone, Daryl,” Morgan stated and Daryl could hear the genuine worry in the man's tone but the only response he gave was a dismissive grunt.

“Even though we haven't seen any walkers around for a week, John's crew isn't around to kill them anymore, or store them or whatever the hell they were doin',” Rick pointed out. “There's a bigger risk to stumble into one in the woods now.”

Daryl's blood bristled when Rick mentioned that bastard _John's_ name. “Can take care of myself,” Daryl muttered. “One geek won't do much, ya know that.”

“Yeah, but twenty could do a lot,” Rick replied grimly.

For a moment, Daryl's mind went to the funeral home and all the walkers he had fought off there, trying to get himself back to Beth. There must have been more than twenty there and he had taken care of all of them, pretty much and then outrun the few that he hadn't been able to take down.

“You should take Beth with you,” Morgan told him, breaking him out of his thoughts. Daryl looked at the man and gave him his best 'Ya-gotta-be-fuckin'-kiddin'-me'-look, wondering if the man had somehow missed the fact that Beth wasn't exactly on speaking terms with him. Not that he was on speaking terms with her either, for that matter.

“No,” Daryl bit out.

Morgan sighed at him exasperatedly. “She's the next best hunter in our group, Daryl,” Morgan said.

“I'm not takin' her with me,” Daryl said, this time even more sternly, making Morgan effectively shut his mouth. Taking Beth with him wasn't an option for him now. Not after how badly he had hurt her when he had told her that the thing between them was nothing.

“It might rain,” Rick pointed out instead. “You sure you wanna be out there on your own?”

“A little rain never killed no one,” Daryl said, looking up at the sky which was indeed dark, even though it was just past noon, probably. “I'll be out for a few days. If I don't come back in five though, don't send anyone to look for me. S'not worth it.”

Daryl pulled his backpack over his shoulder and grabbed his crossbow which he had cleaned to perfection, not really knowing why he was bothering since it would probably be dirty soon anyway. He felt a warm hand on his shoulder and turned to look at Morgan, who seemed to be forcing him to look him dead in the eyes.

“You're family,” Morgan said calmly. “It will _always_ be worth it.”

For some reason, Daryl's chest felt a little bit warmer at Morgan's words. At first he didn't know why, but then, as soon as he had mentally asked himself the question, he just knew. This was one of the few times that someone had acknowledged him as a real part of this family. Morgan was a new addition and the have him say those words meant that he had accepted that Daryl really was a part of the group. The overwhelming sense of acknowledgment that he had never gotten when he was a kid washed over him and made him feel warm and welcome and Daryl couldn't help but soften the glare he had been giving the other man earlier.

“Ya know why I can't...” Daryl trailed off, leaving the 'take her with me' unsaid.

Morgan nodded, “You're both very stupid about it all though. But that's just my opinion.”

Daryl almost snorted, but instead he looked away. That was when he noticed that Rick had left him and Morgan alone. He frowned to himself, but he couldn't think about where his brother had disappeared to so suddenly.

He had a hunt to go on.

* * *

Beth finished braiding her wet hair when there was a knock on her door. She frowned and tied her braid in the end before walking over to the door and opening it. Rick was standing on the other side and he was looking kind of nervous, which only made her frown even deeper.

“What's wrong?” Beth asked, a small sense of panic settling inside of her.

“I don't even know whether I should be telling you this or not,” Rick stated, sounding just as nervous as he looked.

“What?” Beth wondered, watching him as he took a deep breath.

“Daryl's leaving on a longer hunt and he's intent on going alone,” Rick finally said before pausing to look at her.

Beth stared at him for a moment, not sure that she had heard him correctly. Daryl was going on a longer run – _alone_? Beth's blood began pumping in her veins and she was pretty sure that she let out a small growl as she turned around and walked to her bed where she had put her knife holster. Quickly, she attached it to her thigh and grabbed her throwing knives, putting them all in their respective place before grabbing her spare gun and the emergency backpack that she always had packed with food and necessaries.

“I am going to kill him,” was the last thing she said as she stepped out of her room, grabbing the jacket she usually used when she went out hunting, zipping it up as she made her way down the stairs quickly.

She could hear Rick calling after her and following her, but she was so pissed off that all she saw was red and as soon as she stepped out of the house, the only person she could see was Daryl, who had his own pack ready. She stomped over to him and glared at him when he finally turned, clearly having heard her approach.

He watched her tensely but before he could even open his mouth to say anything, Beth had slammed into him, pushing him with both hands on his chest. Daryl stumbled back slightly before staring at her open-mouthed and it only fueled the anger inside of Beth.

Over a week of not talking to each other was bound to make her explode eventually.

“Are you crazy?” Beth asked, her voice more demanding than anything really. She was so angry that her question had come out louder than she had originally intended it to. She watched Daryl's eyes flicker from her face, to the side, where she was sure the rest of their family had come out to watch their interaction. Beth didn't care though.

“Do you really think that just because the two of us aren't talkin', that you can just go off on a hunt all by yourself in the woods that are probably crawling with walkers?” she glared at him, pushing him again. This time, he was ready for it, so he didn't stumble, but he did still look as if she had just smacked him in the face with something. The dumb look on his face only served to make her more annoyed. No, not because it was actually a dumb look, but because he was looking _so good_ that she actually wanted to hit him for making her feel all the damn things that she had been trying not to feel since their argument.

Beth zipped up her jacket, still glaring at him as she made sure that her holsters were in place. She adjusted her backpack on her back and suppressed the urge to growl at him again. “This isn't gonna be the first time the two of us walk in the woods together without talking,” she told him, still shooting daggers at him through her eyes while he stared down at her. Beth turned around and met Morgan's gaze. The man she saw as a father seemed to be rather amused by her display of anger and Beth did her best to just nod curtly at him, silently telling him that she was going with Daryl while also ignoring the smug and amused looks that the rest of the people in their family were giving them.

Shooting Daryl one last glare, she brushed past him as she began walking toward the woods, ignoring the way that her skin felt as if it was on fire after having touched him again after so long.

* * *

As she brushed past Daryl, he couldn't help but breathe in. This was the first time in over a week that she had spoken directly to him. Not only had she spoken to him, but she had actually called him out on going out there alone and _pushed_ him, _physically_. Daryl had been so shocked that he hadn't actually been able to react or say anything, but all the while he had been very aware of the fact that everyone else was watching them.

He stared after Beth as she walked away, toward the forest, not looking back at him even once to see if he was following her. Turning back, he met Rick's eyes and his brother didn't look the least guilty, which told Daryl that he had indeed been the one to inform Beth that Daryl had been planning on going on a hunt alone. He rolled his eyes at the bemused expression on everyone's faces and started after Beth, strapping his crossbow over his back.

Daryl didn't even know what to expect when he finally caught up to her, but he decided that it might be better to keep at least some distance still. He opted for walking behind her rather than falling into step next to her. She was angry with him for more than just not telling her that he was going on a hunt alone and he didn't want it all to come spewing out of her in the middle of the woods where any walker could hear them. There was no saying in how things could escalate if they began arguing now, especially after having had their emotions bottled up for so many days.

There was a chill in the breeze as they walked and Daryl could feel how the wind was slowly picking up. The air felt thicker and he looked up at the sky to see that the clouds had only gotten darker, hiding the sun away from them completely. It had been a good hour or two since they had set out and neither of them had spoken a single word. His eyes moved to Beth, who was stomping angrily over fallen branches and stepping on twigs, breaking them loud enough to scare away any game that might not have hidden away due to the impending bad weather.

Without thinking, he picked up his speed and grabbed her wrist, forcing her to stop. She swirled around, her braid almost smacking him in the face as she glared up at him. Daryl didn't fail to notice how she didn't pull her arm away from his grip though.

Her cheeks were red and she was breathing heavily through her nose as she stared him down, daring him to say something to her. He opened his mouth to speak, but words failed him when his eyes settled on her pink lips that were pressed together tightly. At loss of words, he just stared at them, feeling the heat from her wrist spread over his palm, as if her warmth was somehow transferring to his body through that simple skin-on-skin contact. All of the sudden, he wanted nothing more than to just tug her body flush against his and pry her lips apart with his tongue. All he wanted was to close the distance between them and damn the rest of the world and his fear of losing her again.

He stared at her lips until he finally moved his gaze upwards, his eyes meeting hers. Beth was still breathing heavily through her nose, but her eyes seemed to soften slightly as she looked at him now. Her blue eyes were darkened and Daryl wasn't sure whether it was out of anger or something else, but he was willing to find out.

Moving a little closer, he began pulling her in, when suddenly thunder rumbled above them, making them both jump apart. They looked up at the sky together and Daryl frowned.

“There's a storm comin',” he told her, finally breaking the silence that had fallen between them. “We're too far from the farm. We won't make it there before it hits.”

Beth stared at him for another moment before looking up at the dark clouds. Daryl felt a raindrop hit his forehead.

“There's a cabin,” Beth said. He looked at her again, but she had turned her head to the side, looking at a small path a little further away. “Follow me,” she told him as she began walking again. Daryl looked up at the sky once more, feeling another wet drop connect with his face before he once again began walking after Beth, this time, just a little bit faster than before.

  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, there is no more running. There will be one major confrontation in that cabin and it will surely be...explosive... *laughs evilly*
> 
> For now though, I would very much like to hear what you thought about this chapter! What was your favorite part? Any favorite piece of dialogue? Did you like Beth finally losing some of her cool on Daryl when Rick told her that he was leaving on a hunt alone? Tell me everything in a comment! I read every single one of them and even though I sometimes don't have time to reply, know that they serve as an extra push for me to write! :)
> 
> Lots of love guys! Have a wonderful day/night/whatever! :) xx


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the storm raging outside the little cabin, Beth and Daryl find themselves with no way to escape the confrontation that has been pushed back too many times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick little note here. This chapter is the one where this story officially goes over into Mature territory. I'm very nervous about what you guys will think about it because it's the first time I've ever posted something like this (I have written, but never posted). All I'm asking for is that you guys please be kind in your comments and well, I guess enjoy yourselves...
> 
> WARNING: This chapter has content that should only be read by mature readers. If you don't like such things, you'll probably understand when it's time to stop reading and just skip to the last paragraph of the chapter.

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 25

“Come on!” Beth called out as she ran up the steps of the cabin. She looked through her backpack for the key that she always kept there and fumbled to put it in the lock, the thunder and rain distracting her. The darkness that had fallen over them made it difficult to see and it took her a couple of seconds to finally get the key in its place and turn the lock. She pushed the door open and hurried inside to hold the door from slamming into the wall due to the strong wind. Daryl entered the cabin a mere second after her, dropping his crossbow and his own backpack to the floor so that he could help her shut the door.

When Beth finally managed to turn the lock again, the loud wind and the raging storm outside seemed just a little duller, but lightning still illuminated the cabin through the small windows that they would need to cover before they could settle in fully.

At the moment though, all they could do was lean back against the cabin door and pant loudly. They had been running ever since the rain started pouring down on them and they were both soaked through. Beth could hear droplets fall to the wooden floor and gather in a small puddle beneath their boots. She dared a glance toward Daryl and noticed that his hair was plastered to his face, just like hers was to her own. She could see his cheeks and the tip of his nose though and she noted that they were both a little red, most likely from the cold. Beth was sure that she didn't look much better because her clothes were sticking to her body like a second skin. She tried hard not to notice the way that Daryl's shirt sleeves clung perfectly to his muscled arms.

“We need some light,” Beth croaked out in a low breath, just as the thunder outside made her jump in surprise. She wasn't scared of the storm, but loud noises surprised her a bit after having gotten used to the quietness of the farm.

Taking a step away from the door, she walked over to the small table in the middle of the room and opened one of its drawers. She retrieved a couple of candles that she and Morgan had left there as well as the small pack of matches, using one of them to light one of the candles. Her hands shook a little as she fumbled with the stick, but finally, she was able to get the candle lit and place it in one of the small lanterns that she had found a couple of months back. She turned toward Daryl again, only to see him looking through one of the small windows, squinting to see outside.

“Can't see anythin' out there,” he mumbled. “Walkers might be able to see the light though...”

“There are black curtains and a staple gun in the corner,” Beth said pointing him in the right direction as she lit another candle and placed it in a second lantern. “Stay here, okay? Morgan and I stashed some spare clothes here a while ago. I'll be right back,” she told him, leaving one of the lit lanterns on the table as she took the other and walked over to the small bedroom.

She looked through the closet as quickly as she could, grabbing a longer shirt for herself that she knew would fit as well as some flannel pajama bottoms and new underwear. Not being able to find herself a bra, she decided that her old one would just have to dry up and besides, the shirt she had gotten herself was black so there wasn't much risk of indecency in front of Daryl.

Her cheeks heated up a bit at the thought of having Daryl looking at her and noticing that she wasn't wearing a bra, but she knew that he had probably seen enough women without them in his life that it wouldn't bother him much. Besides, she had slept without a bra on next to him too many times to count and it had never bothered him then. On the other hand, she didn't know whether the two of them were actually okay enough again to go back to what they once had. It wasn't as if they had resolved anything.

Beth shook her head at herself and grabbed a pair of bigger sweatpants, a pair of boxer briefs and two shirts, one long sleeved and one short sleeved. She didn't know what Daryl would feel more comfortable wearing, but she knew that the rain had been freezing and that _she_ felt as if she had just fallen into a lake in the middle of Winter. It would simply have to be his choice whether he wanted to wear it or not, but she was going to bring out the good blankets too.

Pulling out two towels as well, Beth finally walked back into the living room again. Daryl seemed to have just finished pulling the black curtains over the windows and securing them so that no light from the inside could be seen outside. He turned to face her when he heard her approaching and she placed the clean and dry clothes on the table for him before throwing the towel his way. Daryl caught it with ease and gave her a questioning look.

“You need to change out of those wet clothes,” Beth told him. “If you get pneumonia, I don't think there's much we'll be able to do for you on the farm.”

Suddenly, the loud roar of thunder and lightning shook the cabin, making some of the things resting on the cabinets shake as well. Daryl's eyes flickered to the side before settling on hers again.

“Ya sure this place is gonna hold?” he asked her, his voice rough and tired.

“Yeah,” Beth nodded. “Morgan and I have been through a storm like this once and it still stood here the next day. I think it must have been a real hunter's cabin or something that someone built with a strong foundation as well as–” Beth was cut off by the thunder again. She swallowed thickly as she began to shiver. “Just get changed,” she finally said. “I'll change in the other room.”

Daryl grunted something in reply, but she didn't hear him. She walked back to the bedroom where she had placed her own clothes, looking at them for only a moment before she began to change. Listening to the thunder one more time, she sighed, knowing that this was going to be one hell of a night.

* * *

Daryl watched her as she moved away to the other room, doing his best to keep his eyes from straying downwards where her pants clung to her ass in a way that made him forget about the coldness that was making his skin prickle and caused his blood to rush south.

He inhaled deeply and shook his head, starting to wipe his hair with the towel that Beth had thrown at him. Drying it the best he could, he proceeded to wipe his face and then quickly removed his wet clothes, patting his skin with the towel as he did. He knew that Beth would probably give him a few minutes of privacy, but he didn't want to force her to stay in that other room for too long. Though he didn't doubt that it might take her a while longer to dry her own hair considering that it was so long now. Still, he didn't want to risk her seeing him naked or something because surely, it would be embarrassing for the both of them.

Not because Daryl was ashamed of his physique by any chance. No, the last few years – since the Outbreak – he had pretty much burned away all the extra layers of fat he might have had from the years he had spent drifting with Merle. He had always had strong arms which had been useful both when it came to hunting and helping his brother out in bar fights, but drinking and not eating particularly healthy food had had him gain some weight. Now though, Daryl couldn't help but think that he felt the best he had ever felt physically. Sure, these last few years had taken their toll on him in other ways, mostly through tiredness since he didn't sleep very well, always on alert for any walkers stumbling by. If one overlooked that though, he knew that he had gotten some more pronounced muscles in his body.

Pulling on the T-shirt, Daryl left the long sleeved shirt on the small table. He figured he would use that if the cold got any worse, but for now the short-sleeved one would be enough for him. Gathering the wet clothes he had worn before, he found himself frowning as he looked around, trying to find a place that he could hang them in so that they would dry up. Whenever the storm passed, he didn't feel like returning to the farmhouse wearing sweatpants and a T-shirt because surely it would make the rest of his family wonder where he and Beth had been and what they might have been doing when they had been alone.

Not that they were doing anything, or even _would_ do anything.

The wet clothes that he had been wearing earlier were dripping on the floor and without thinking much about it, Daryl began walking toward the other room that Beth had disappeared into. He noticed that the door was ajar, so he figured that she must have finished getting re-dressed. Just as he approached it and opened his mouth to ask her where he should put his discarded clothing, his throat closed up and all the words in the English language disappeared from his mind.

Through the small opening, he could clearly see Beth inside the room. Her back was turned toward him though and Daryl felt his eyes widening a little as he watched her, almost mesmerized, as she grabbed the hem of her wet shirt and lifted it over her head. In Daryl's mind, it all happened so slowly that he could see pretty much every bit of muscle moving in her back. He watched as she stretched her arms up high, letting the wet shirt get peeled off of her body tantalizingly slow before dropping it to the floor. Her hands moved down, to her pants and somewhere in the distance he heard a zipper go down, but his mind could only seem to register what was happening when he saw the edge of her cotton underwear.

Daryl quickly took a step back so that he would no longer be able to see her. His heart was beating frantically inside his chest and he could feel himself stirring inside his fresh, dry boxers. Closing his eyes tightly, he tried his best to calm down. The sweatpants were big enough so that Beth wouldn't be able to see anything through them, but if she got close enough, she would without a doubt be able to feel his growing hardness.

Flashes of her creamy white skin being exposed like that came back to his mind and Daryl began cursing himself mentally for it. The memory of actually seeing how her body had changed since the two of them had last been together all those months ago after the prison had fallen would probably forever be seared inside his brain and Daryl didn't know whether that was a good thing or not. He had made a mistake by assuming that she would have finished dressing but now all he seemed to want was to open that door fully and take her in completely, in every way possible.

It was almost a primal urge, he realized; how his body seemed to instantly react to hers. He couldn't deny that he had wanted her for months now, although he knew that whatever it was that had been going on between them had been ruined by him completely. Beth was angry with him and there was no chance in hell that she would be willing to actually hear him out and listen to him as he explained to her all the reasons to why what he was doing to them was the right thing. Still, his hands seemed to be itching to reach out to her every time she was close enough and he wanted nothing more than to just pull her closer and get all tangled up in the destruction that would surely follow if he ever allowed himself to make a move.

“Daryl?” Beth's soft voice came from the doorway. Daryl lifted his gaze from the floor, seeing that Beth had finally stepped out of the room and was now wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants and a T-shirt that seemed to be way too big on her. He noticed that there weren't any bra-straps visible on one of her shoulders where the shirt had fallen down a little and he acknowledged that she probably wasn't wearing a bra. “Everything okay?” Beth continued, worry crossing her face despite the fact that he knew that she was still pissed with him.

“Yeah,” he croaked out before clearing his throat. He needed to get his thoughts sorted and his head straight. “Just didn't know what to do with the wet clothes, s'all.”

“I can hang them to dry in the shower,” Beth offered, holding out her hand so that he could hand her the clothes.

“Ya don't gotta do it,” he told her. “Can do it myself.”

“Daryl,” Beth sighed, sounding defeated. She gave him a look of exasperation and Daryl knew that the last thing she needed was for him to argue with her about this too.

Daryl handed her the clothes, deciding that it was better to not make a big deal out of it. Besides, he couldn't exactly stare her down when his mind constantly kept returning to the fact that she had been half-naked – and probably  _fully_ naked too – in the next room just a few moments ago. Beth took the clothes from him and offered him a tiny, barely noticeable smile before heading off to another door.

Things seemed to be civil enough between them right now and Daryl hoped that it would continue that way until tomorrow. By then the storm which was still raging outside would probably have subsided and the two of them would be able to return back to the farmhouse. The politeness continued when Beth returned from the small bathroom and informed him that she was going to heat up some of the canned food that she had brought with her in her pack so that they could eat. Daryl told her that they should warm Carol's stew instead since it would probably go bad in a few days and that they didn't really know how long it might take for the storm to pass. Beth seemed to wordlessly agree and he watched her curiously as she grabbed the backpack he had dropped on the floor when he had entered the cabin and took out the plastic container that Carol had put the stew in.

Daryl wasn't very hungry and he knew that Carol had given him enough stew to feed him for two days at least. That meant that there would surely be enough for both him and Beth to eat tonight. He observed her quietly as she heated the food up using a small wood driven stove. Daryl noted that she seemed a bit nervous though and he wondered whether she felt just as out of place as he did at the moment. Perhaps the reason that she was doing all this work was because she needed to keep herself distracted, just as he needed to keep himself at a certain distance from her so that he wouldn't feel the temptation to just jump her.

After a while, Beth pulled out two small bowls and divided the stew up between them. She placed them on the small dinner table and looked his way, wordlessly giving him an order – it seemed – to sit down across from her. Daryl did so and looked at the spoon that she had placed next to the bowl. He glanced up at her and realized that she was watching him, something unreadable on her face this time around. Her hands seemed to grip the table just a little bit tighter before she reached for her spoon and took some food with it. She lifted it to her mouth and blew a few slow breaths on it, never taking her eyes off of his as she did. Daryl didn't even look away as she placed the spoon inside her mouth and swallowed the mouthful of stew because to him, it was clear that she was doing  _something_ .

“Aren't you going to eat that?” Beth asked when she finally pulled the spoon from her mouth. She was pointing at his bowl with the utensil and Daryl glanced down at his food. He grunted a reply and grabbed his own spoon roughly, looking up at her again just in time to see her amused smirk fall of her face before she resumed eating.

That was when Daryl realized that even though they were being civil with each other, the tension between them was still there. Not only that though. In fact, it seemed as if the tension inside the cabin only got thicker with every moment that passed, as they ate their food, never taking their eyes off one another.

* * *

Maggie looked at the pouring rain, jumping slightly when lightning flashed across the sky and thunder followed a mere second later. It had gotten so dark outside that it was impossible to see and everyone had retreated to the safety of their rooms, covering all windows with curtains so that any walkers outside wouldn't be able to see the farmhouse. There was no way for anyone to sit and guard outside tonight and Maggie knew that having someone on the lookout for danger wouldn't do much use anyway since it was impossible to see anything in the darkness.

Yet, Maggie found herself looking outside through the small spring between the heavy curtains in the living room. She couldn't help but worry about her sister and Daryl, knowing that the two of them were out there somewhere in the middle of the storm. There was no way for them to know just how far Beth and Daryl had walked before the storm hit and Maggie worried that they might be caught in a bad place somewhere, or in danger. It wasn't the first time that they had lived through a storm since the Outbreak and all the other times that Maggie could remember having to hide because of the heavy rain and thunder, it had been crawling with walkers. The sound of the thunder and the illumination of the lightning seemed to confuse the dead ones who were drawn to both the light and the loud noise. They wandered around aimlessly and sometimes they would build up to a herd which was the real danger. A lone straggler wouldn't do much even if it somehow got inside the house, but since Rick and the others had made sure to barricade all doors as a safety measure, Maggie doubted that anything like that would happen anyways.

Though there was still no way for her to know how her sister and the hunter were doing.

“Why don't you go to bed, Maggie?” Morgan's soft voice sounded behind her. Maggie turned around slightly and faced the older man and shrugged before looking out the window again. She heard Morgan sigh behind her. “They'll be fine, you know,” Morgan said.

“I hope so,” Maggie replied. “I can't help but worry though.”

Morgan came to stand beside her. “About Beth?” he wondered.

“About _both_ of them,” Maggie clarified. “Both Daryl and Beth are out there and they are both a part of my family.”

Morgan's lips twitched up in a smile at her words. “They two of them will probably return once the storm passes,” he said. “It might take them a little while to find a safe way home though since some trees might have fallen and blocked the roads.”

“Do you think they made it to a safe place?” Maggie asked, worry still in her tone despite Morgan's reassuring words.

“Probably,” Morgan nodded. “I'm sure Daryl felt the storm coming though. He'll take care of the lil' Lady.”

Maggie realized that Morgan wasn't just assuring her, but also himself. She knew that the older man cared about her sister as a father would care about his daughter and she knew that because of the fact that it wasn't actually blood binding them, their bond was probably even stronger than that. Now Maggie could see that even though Morgan's voice didn't show any kind of worry, his eyes betrayed him. He needed just as much reassurance as Maggie had needed when she had found herself standing by the window after everyone else had gone to bed.

Maggie reached out and took Morgan's hand in hers, giving him a comforting squeeze. He looked over at her and Maggie smiled at him. “They'll take care of each other,” she said, her smile widening just a little as she felt Morgan squeeze her hand back.

* * *

Beth pulled the blanket tighter around herself as her shivers began shaking her body. Her jaw was clenched as she tried to keep her teeth from chattering against each other and she watched Daryl put a wooden log inside the small fireplace that she had always liked.

“Don't be tense,” he told her. “Your muscles will draw together an' you won't get any warmer. Try an' relax instead or you'll just cramp up.”

“It's kind of difficult to relax when your body feels as if it's about to break in half like a popsickle or somethin',” Beth countered, breathing through her nose a few times to relax her muscles. She knew that it was probably tiredness that had caused her sudden shivering. After having gotten some food in her belly and finally being able to calm down, her exhaustion from running through the woods in the rain seemed to have caught up with her.

As soon as Daryl had seen the first tremors pass through her body, he had gone to the couch and gotten her the blankets, covering her up with them. She was thankful for his kindness, even though she had spent the better part of their late night dinner teasing him without actually saying anything to him. He hid it well, but she knew that one way or another, she was affecting him just as he was affecting her. Now though, she couldn't be thinking about that because Daryl had finally managed to get a small fire going in the fireplace. Beth dropped two couch pillows to the floor so that she could get closer and sat down, eyes on the smoldering wood.

“Can't let the fire catch on too much,” Daryl said to her. “If we fall asleep I don't wanna burn the cabin down since there ain't nothin' to keep the flames in check.”

Beth buried her face in her blanket, hiding the smile on her face as she bit back a joke about him already having burnt a shack down once before. She didn't know where they stood right now, but she knew for certain that there was no way that he would appreciate such a joke from her now. Instead of saying anything at all, she simply patted the pillow next to her on the floor. Daryl looked at her for a moment, seeming hesitant at first, but finally, he lowered himself to sit down next to her.

Beth decided that whatever anger she still felt toward him could wait for a while. She was cold and they were alone and all she really wanted was to have him close to her after being without him for over a week. His absence had been felt every single night and she had absolutely  _hated_ sleeping without him. This – having him next to her on the floor – was actually the closest the two of them had been since that day that she had cleaned his wounds and almost kissed him. Beth thought to the moment in the woods, right before the thunderstorm had hit and the rain had started. There had been a split second when she had felt as if Daryl would lose his cool and finally just do something to stop the never ending circling that they had been doing around each other. She hadn't wanted to be the one to make the first move then because she had still been mad at him, but her heart had stuttered in her chest when he had gazed down at her the way he had.

Absentmindedly, Beth found herself leaning into Daryl a little as she moved her blanket around so that it would be able to cover the both of them instead of just her. She was sure that even though he had opted to wear the short-sleeved shirt, he was still just as cold as she was. The storm was still raging on outside and the cabin didn't exactly have the best isolation so there was definitely a draft somewhere. The small fire that was burning in the fireplace could only do so much for them right now and Beth knew that the best way to heat up would be to sit a little closer to each other. The only problem though was that when Beth finally did lean into Daryl, placing her head on his shoulder, the man actually  _tensed_ .

It was as if all that anger and all that rage that Beth had been bottling up for so long finally just  _snapped_ and she pulled back from him as if she had been burned. She stood up, ignoring how the cold hit her again like a thousand needles when her warm blanket dropped to the floor and when she felt Daryl actually reach out after her, she pulled her wrist away from his touch.

“Why do you do that?” she demanded to know. “Why do you keep pushing me away like that?”

Daryl was on his feet just a second after her and when he once again reached out to her, she pulled away from him and took a step back with narrowed eyes. He opened his mouth to say something but before he could, Beth beat him to it once more.

“It isn't fair, Daryl and you know it,” she said, her voice loud and clear. It was obvious that she wasn't very worried about any walkers overhearing them because of the storm that was still going strong outside the cabin. “You're not being fair to either of us!”

“What the hell do you want from me?” he finally yelled back at her, taking two large steps toward her, towering over her.

Beth placed both hands on his chest and pushed him away slightly, forcing him to take a step back. “I don't understand why you're doing this,” she told him. “I don't understand anything about you. I'm sick and tired of you lying to my face and I'm more than done with you pretending that there is _nothing_ going on between us!”

Daryl stared at her and Beth stared right back. She knew that this was it. This was her only chance to finally say everything that she had been wanting to say for so long. Finally, this was her chance to tell him that she knew that there must have been something between them before she had been presumed to be dead and _finally_ there would be no way for Daryl to avoid the subject by running from her.

Everything that she wanted to say to him was spinning around in her head though. There were only two things that seemed to be making any sense and for some reason, both of them felt... _familiar_.

“You keep pushing me away and I know that it's just because _you're afraid_ ,” Beth told him, her chill from earlier forgotten. “I know that you look at me and just see another dead girl–”

“You _were_ dead!” Daryl exploded suddenly, his eyes narrowing and darkening as they bored into hers, just as something shifted in the room. “You were fucking _dead,_ Beth!”

* * *

Daryl was breathing hard through his nose, trying to control the anger that had bubbled up inside of him. He had done his best to remain calm, despite Beth's accusations but hearing that final one, the one that he had heard once before in another lifetime... He just hadn't been able to hold it all in anymore.

“You were dead,” he repeated again, looking her in the eyes as his voice trembled a little. The cabin shook with the force of the wind outside, the windows that he had secured rattled and Daryl could no longer keep an even tone as he spoke. “Ya don't know what it was like,” he said, sounding more accusing than anything else.

He couldn't believe that they were back here again. It was as if they had gone back in time and re-created that other cabin that they had later burned down and it was all too much for Daryl to handle. It was all happening all over again. The two of them were alone, yelling at each other at the top of their lungs, spewing accusations from left to right and she was once again calling him out on his bullshit and telling him that he saw her as someone that was weak.

_She had no idea._

“Ya don't know what it was like,” he repeated. “Ya don't know what it was like to go _seven months_ , thinking you were dead!” He took in her appearance. Her wet hair was hanging loose around her shoulders, already starting to dry leaving it a mess. Her lips were pressed tightly together in a thin line and her eyes remained connected with his, her glare never wavering, no matter how vulnerable he knew that he sounded.

“Seven _fuckin'_ months, Beth,” Daryl bit out harshly. “Seven months of replayin' your fuckin' death every single day, tryin' to understand where everythin' went wrong – Where _I_ went wrong.” Something began changing in her look, but he couldn't stop. Not now, not ever. “I didn't even know what had happened first. I fuckin' _blinked_ and then ya were layin' on the floor– _dead_. Ya were in front of me one second and then the next–” He cut himself off and snapped his fingers together. “I didn't wanna believe it. I _couldn't_ believe it. So I killed the bitch that killed you without thinkin' and even after I carried ya body down five fuckin' flights of stairs, I still didn't wanna believe–”

He looked away from her when his voice cracked, closing his tightly as tears began to sting. He remembered every single day of being on the road. He remembered every detail of her being shot because he had relived it every night since he buried her, up until they had found her again.

“Daryl...” Beth whispered and he could _feel_ her take a step toward him. Her hand brushed against his shoulder, but he shook her off.

“ _No_ ,” he hissed. “Ya said ya were tired of me always lyin' to ya. I'm gonna tell ya the truth _now_.” Beth's hand was still hovering when he turned back to look at her and he couldn't help but notice that she was standing a lot closer to him now, her expression worried. “For me, you were dead for seven months, Beth,” he said, feeling his throat clogging up again. “An' yet ya have no clue what I – What we _all_ went through. While you were strugglin' with your health, we were strugglin' to keep going. After we...” he trailed off, shaking his head at himself for once again changing his words. “After _I_ got ya that coffin, after _I_ buried ya... I couldn't let anyone else touch ya after ya died. I couldn't let anyone else carry ya. Ya deserved better than to just be buried in a fuckin' sheet so I found ya that damn coffin that ya have nightmares 'bout!”

He was angry with himself for everything he had done. Maybe he should have waited just a little longer? Maybe he should have known that she wasn't dead for real?

Daryl met Beth's gaze again, knowing damn well that he had tears in them, but he couldn't hide from her now. Not when he was already giving her every dark secret he had been keeping locked up in his heart since the day that he had lost her.

“Not a day went by that I didn't think if there'd been somethin' I could'a done. Maybe if I–” Daryl could barely talk anymore. He was tired of yelling and he was even more tired of pretending.

“Maybe if you hadn't stopped looking...”

Her voice had sounded so small, that he wasn't even sure that she had spoken at all at first. His head snapped up and he looked at her face. She seemed deep in thought, almost as if in a daze when she spoke. The deja vu of the situation hit him all over again.

“What did you just say?” he asked, not daring to believe that she had actually repeated something that he had said so long ago. He knew that he had seen that dazed expression on her face a few times since they had found her again. It was the expression that Morgan had told him and Rick about that very first night in the farmhouse; the one that said that she was remembering something.

“Maybe if you hadn't stopped lookin',” she repeated, her eyes finally coming to rest on his face. She still looked a bit confused, but he could tell that she was speaking surely. “Maybe you could have done somethin'.”

Now, she was repeating the words that he had once told her; in another place, in another lifetime.

“Have we had this conversation before, Daryl?” she wondered, taking a tentative step toward him. “Have we had a conversation similar to this one?” He could almost feel how she wanted to reach out to him again, to touch him, and he knew that he was struggling to not just pull her into his arms.

As she stepped closer to him this time though, he didn't move away from her. His heart was beating fast in his chest, his breath coming out in short puffs and the air around them, no matter how cold, felt like it was sizzling with heat and tension. There was no point in lying to her anymore. She knew that he had carried her, buried her and mourned her all that time that they had been separated. He knew that she understood that there must be so much more to the story that he wasn't yet willing to talk about and he was just thankful for the fact that she hadn't run the other way from him yet.

So since there was nowhere for him to escape, Daryl saw no other option but to once again give her an honest reply. As soon as he spoke his admission, he knew that everything between them was bound to change, but he would never have been able to expect a one-syllable word to force such a reaction from Beth.

Yet, he breathed it out: “Yes.”

* * *

Beth didn't really know what happened at first. Her brain couldn't register whether he had been the one to take another step toward her first or if she had been the one to close the distance between them after his admission.

One second, a memory long forgotten begun coming back to her; the distinct voice that belonged to Daryl and another one that belonged to her being shouted inside her brain. The memory of Daryl telling her that he blamed himself, that he wished there was something he could have done and then her, embracing him from behind as he cried – It was too strong for her to ignore and she hadn't been able to stop from mumbling the words she was certain he had spoken to her once, a long time ago.

When he had _finally_ told her the truth – that they _had_ indeed had a similar conversation to the one they were having now – she just hadn't been able to stop herself. She had stepped forward, taken a hold of his shirt and pulled him down to her level, claiming his lips in an almost bruising kiss.

Her lips pressed against Daryl's, not even registering their coldness. She moved her mouth over his, trying to coax him into reacting as she pulled him a little bit closer by his shirt that she was still clutching in her hands. Nibbling on his lower lip, she frowned when she realized that Daryl wasn't kissing her back, and that was exactly when it crashed down on her.

She had just thrown herself at Daryl.

She had just thrown herself at _Daryl Dixon_ and actually _kissed_ him and he wasn't kissing her back. He wasn't even touching her, she realized after another second passed. His hands were hovering over her shoulders as if he wanted to push her away but didn't dare to make a move. She opened her eyes and found him staring down at her, his own eyes widened to a point that was almost comical considering who he was. Beth was sure that she had never seen such a baffled expression on Daryl's face before and she almost prided herself for being the one to place it there, but not for very long since he _still_ wasn't kissing her back.

Beth pulled back abruptly, her blue eyes slightly darkened as she stared back at him. He was still watching her like she had just grown a second head and finally, she once again remembered what she had just done.

“Oh my God,” she breathed out, cheeks flushing pink as she covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh God, Daryl... I'm so sorry,” she said. “I don't know what came over me. I just–”

Beth felt one of Daryl's rough hands settle at the back of her neck as his other one found purchase in the over-sized shirt she was wearing. He gripped at her waist and pulled her back toward him so quickly that she stumbled into his chest, just as he pressed his lips to hers again. She had been a little startled at first, but the second they began kissing each other hungrily again she just molded against him, holding him just as tight in return.

She pressed her body against his, both hands coming to rest on his shoulders as she returned the hot kiss. The urgency of the entire act warmed Beth from top to toe and the shivering coldness she had felt earlier had melted away. The reason for her shivers now was Daryl, and nothing and no one else. One of her hands moved upwards, tangling in his unruly hair that was still damp from the rain as she opened her mouth, inviting him by licking his lower lip lightly.

The second Daryl's tongue touched hers, heat began pooling low in her belly and she moved impossibly closer. She wanted to be with him in every sense of the word. She wanted to feel every inch of his body pressed against hers until she no longer knew where she began and he ended. She wanted to touch him and hold him like someone who meant everything to her; like someone she never wanted to lose.

While Daryl's hands settled on her hips, she moved hers down to the front of his shirt, down until she reached the hem of it and began tugging it upwards.

“Beth,” he groaned against her lips as she pushed him away a little so that she could drag his shirt off of his body and Daryl lifted his arms without even thinking twice about it. After discarding his shirt she kissed him again, a little softer this time, but now, she could feel a slight hesitation in Daryl. For a moment, she was scared that he might be pulling back from her because of his scars. She had already she seen them though and she didn't care what he or what other people thought about them. They were a part of Daryl and therefore she would love them too. If he could see past the scars on her face and her wrist – scars that she had always thought were a sign of weakness before him – she too would see past his.

Daryl though couldn't really comprehend that this was really happening. If anyone would have told him this morning that he would be getting undressed in front of Beth Greene by the end of the night after confessing how he had mourned her for seven long months, he would have told them that they were insane. The entire thought of the two of them doing something together was just a dream he had had for a long time and there was no way that it would ever actually happen. Now though, as Beth lifted his shirt over his head and he had gotten a taste of her lips, he found himself wondering if there was any way that he could make it keep happening.

He hesitated when she kissed him after removing his shirt, not really sure if she was ready for it to go where he wished it would go. She didn't know how long he had wanted her, how many times he had told himself that it would never happen because she deserved so much better than him, and yet here they were now. Daryl didn't want them to rush into anything too quickly but at the same time, he knew that this had been a long time coming. If she wanted this – if she wanted _him_ – he knew that he was hers to take. He had belonged to her the moment after he had broken down in front of her when they had gotten drunk together. The very second he had burned down that moonshine shack with her, he had known deep down – even though he had tried to deny it to himself – that he was done for. Beth Greene had gotten under his skin in more ways than one and he wanted to keep her in his arms forever, if that was what she wanted too.

When Beth's lips pressed against the side of his neck and she began laying open-mouthed kisses all the way down to his collarbone, Daryl's hips surged forward of their own accord. He ground his pelvis against hers and he knew that Beth could feel his hardening member through the sweatpants he was wearing. Daryl felt like he barely had any time to process everything that was going one, but he knew that he needed assurance from Beth that this was indeed what she wanted. He reached up and cupped her cheeks, pulling her away from his neck as he pressed a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth before pulling back fully.

“Beth,” he repeated her name, a little surprised by how breathless he sounded. He was breathing heavily and he knew that he needed to calm himself a little if Beth told him that she didn't want to go there with him. Taking in her flushed cheeks and kiss-swollen lips, Daryl found it more difficult than ever to calm the erection that was only growing in his pants.

Beth's face felt hot the moment she had felt Daryl's arousal and understood just how much he clearly wanted her, but she was glad to know that the feeling was mutual. Still, as Daryl pulled back and placed that soft kiss against the corner of her mouth, fear rocketed through her. She heard him say her name and his forehead came to rest against hers.

“You... You sure this is what ya want?” he asked her.

Beth's eyes fluttered open again as her lips parted. She took a deep breath through her nose, breathing him in before meeting his eyes. They remained connected with hers only for a moment before flicking down to her parted lips before he let out a noise that sounded a lot like a growl before fusing their lips together again. There was no question that she had been able to convey what she felt without words. She had shown him just what she wanted and she wanted _him_.

The entire thing was just so overwhelming for them both. For as long as Daryl could remember, no one had ever looked at him the way that Beth had looked at him a moment ago. She gazed at him as if he had just presented her with something amazing; like he had given her the world and told her that it was all hers and hers alone.

Beth leaned back a little and he was pretty sure that his heart stopped for a second in fear that she had just realized what a huge mistake she was making by being with him like this. Once again though, he was proven wrong by the wonderful woman that he knew he had fallen for completely. Her azure eyes moved across his bare chest, one of her fingers running through the coarse hair there before finally brushing against the tattoo there, under his collarbone, above his heart.

“It's a lowercase ' _b_ ',” Beth realized, her voice a little shaky. She didn't dare to meet his gaze as she finally allowed herself to see the truth that had been there all along. “And the girl?” she wondered, finally looking up at him, meeting his hooded eyes. “The girl you were always talking about...?”

Daryl's chest felt constricted, her touch on his skin close to the inked secret leaving a burning sensation behind. All he could do was watch her face and wait for her to connect the final dots of all the lies that he had told her before and all the secrets that he had kept from her. Beth though seemed to have something else in mind entirely because the thoughtful expression on her face quickly turned into a glare as her eyes bore into his.

“Tell me,” she demanded. “Say _something_!”

“It's you,” he admitted, blurting out the words before he could regret them or even think anything through. He was tired of pretending and he wanted her to know everything.

He wanted her to know that he loved her.

“It's you,” he said again, this time a bit slower, calmer. “ _She's_ you. This,” he reached for her hand that was still touching the small ' _b_ ' that he had inked into his own skin and covered it with his own, pressing on the small tattoo just a little harder. “This was for you.”

Daryl had never considered himself to be very good with words but the ones he had spoken now seemed to have been just enough for Beth because once more, she cupped his cheeks with her small hands. Her thumbs brushed against them and he closed his eyes when she finally pulled him down towards her again.

This kiss was once again soft, more of a peck than anything else. The one that followed that one was once again urgent and before he knew it, their tongues were stroking languidly against each other once more. Beth pushed him backward, down onto the couch and Daryl lowered himself slowly so that they wouldn't break their kiss. Beth was still standing and she broke the kiss just for a short while so that she could remove the sweatpants that she was wearing. Daryl watched her in a daze as she lowered them over her hips, leaving her in only the black shirt and a pair of light blue cotton panties.

“Ya sure this is a good idea?” Daryl found himself asking, making Beth pause again. She had been about to settle on his lap when he had spoken and she looked at him startled.

“Why wouldn't it be?” she frowned. “I want you, Daryl. I'd like to think that you want me too... You do, don't you?”

Daryl stared at her, “'Course I want ya. Didn't ya just–” He cut himself off and glanced pointedly at his own lap, making a small smile spread across Beth's lips.

“Why are you doubting that I want you just as much?” Beth asked him. “Don't you think that I know by now what I want? _Who_ I want?” As she spoke, Beth lowered herself into his lap, making sure that she was settled right over his arousal as she slowly ground herself down against him. “I want you, Daryl,” she whispered, knowing by the way his breath caught in his throat and the way that he swallowed thickly that he could feel the wetness that had started to gather between her legs. “I don't know how much clearer I can get.”

After that, he stopped asking.

Instead, his hands traveled under her shirt to find her small breasts, his thumbs moving over her nipples until they were hard and she was breathing heavily. He pressed his lips against her bared shoulder before he slowly lifted her shirt, taking the material off of her body as she lifted her arms to help him get it off completely. Daryl had been aware of the fact that she wasn't wearing a bra, but now that he was finally able to actually see her breasts, his mouth went dry. Beth wasn't big chested like some of the women he had drunkenly hooked up with in the past. Some might even say that she was almost entirely flat when they viewed her with her clothes on. Daryl knew better though as he held her small mounds in his hands before lowering his head to catch one of her rosy nipples between his lips. Beth let out a small gasp, her hands tangling in his hair as she pulled him closer to her chest, grinding down on him while she did. Daryl traced his tongue over her hardened nubs, giving them both equal attention. Above him, Beth was panting when she felt one of his hands slide over her stomach, down to where she was moving against his still clothed erection.

_ Why was he still wearing his sweatpants? _

“Why are you still dressed?” Beth gasped when one of his hands gripped her hip tightly while the other slipped into her panties. Daryl moved over her wet curls until he found what he was looking for and traced her slit with his index finger. Beth lifted herself up a little to give him better access, forcing her eyes to open and meet his when he moved his head away from her chest. He was staring at her face, taking in every sign of pleasure that she was giving him. Beth's breath hitched slightly when Daryl began rubbing slow circles around her clit, arousing her more and more with every move he made.

Daryl might have ignored her question, wanting to give her pleasure before himself, but he could feel himself straining against the material of his sweatpants. It had been a while since he had been with a woman and Beth was something new to him, some _one_ special that he wanted to learn everything about. He wanted to know what made her tick and what would make her cross over that edge of euphoria that he wanted to make her feel with him tonight while the storm outside continued unnoticed by the two of them now that they were so lost in each other.

Daryl moved his fingers against her while Beth gasped and moaned. She let out a sound that he wanted to make her repeat a thousand more times when he finally slid one of his fingers into her wet heat. Her fingers clutched at his shoulders, fingernails digging in almost painfully and he marveled at how tight she was when he slipped in another digit. She moved against his hand on pure instinct, trying to get the release that she so desperately wanted but at the same time, she wanted him to enjoy it _with_ her.

“Take off your pants,” she whispered against his ear. Daryl could feel her tightening around his fingers, but he knew that he wanted to be inside of her when she actually came. He just hoped that he would be able to hold off for that long himself.

Slipping his fingers out of her, he let Beth lift herself off of him enough so that he could lift his hips and pull down his pants and boxers in one go. His painfully hard erection stood proudly between them, his head already glistening as it brushed up against her wet slit. Daryl watched Beth as she took him in and he couldn't help but let a small moan slip out of his mouth when he noticed her tongue dart out to wet her lips. He could just imagine what it would feel like to have her hot mouth wrapped around him, but right now, he wanted something else.

Beth couldn't help but touch him though. She trailed her finger over his hard cock slowly, not really knowing how she was making it difficult for him to breathe as she did. Her thumb brushed over his tip as she gathered up the drop of pre-cum before grasping him, giving him a half-stroke downward that he was certain caused his heart to almost burst out of his chest.

“We don't got any protection,” Daryl mumbled as his lips sought out hers again.

Beth kissed him back softly, “We'll be fine.”

Daryl trusted her with his life so if she told him that they would be okay this time, he believed her. No one knew better how Beth's body worked than Beth and he knew enough about women to know that having a messed up cycle would be enough for her not to get pregnant. Daryl was still a bit surprised with himself that he managed to form coherent thoughts as Beth slowly worked his cock with her hand, but he did make a mental note that he needed to find them some condoms sooner rather than later, just as reassurance. Although, he knew that he would do his best to pull out as a safety measure tonight too.

Beth marveled at the soft skin and the hardness that it covered. She knew that she cared about Daryl more than she had ever cared about anyone and now she knew for sure that there was nothing about this man that wasn't beautiful.

“Ya done this before?” Daryl asked her, kissing her cheek when he finally made her let go of him. “I know ya don't remember, but...” he trailed off not really knowing how to formulate his question.

“I have,” Beth nodded, remembering the conversation she had had with Maggie a good couple of months ago. “I don't remember it though, but I know that I have.” It kind of surprised her that she kind of knew what she was doing with him though, since he seemed to be enjoying himself just as much as she was. Beth assumed that it must be one of those things where it was more muscle memory than anything else.

Daryl stared at her and nodded slowly, understanding. This would be her first time in every sense except for being her actual first time. She knew that she had had sex before, but since she didn't remember anything about it, he would be her first tonight. He would be the one she would remember as her first until her memories came back – If they  _ever_ came back, that is.

“Want ya like this,” he told her, keeping her over him as he leaned back slightly, turning them so that he was laying down and she was settled on top of him. “You'll be able to stop whenever ya want.”

“I'm afraid I won't ever want to stop,” Beth said, letting out a low chuckle as she leaned down to press a kiss against his chest. She could feel his heart beating under her touch and she closed her eyes, just wanting to take everything about this moment in and remember it forever.

Daryl kissed her softly again before she lifted herself up. He grabbed his cock and guided it to her entrance, but didn't push inside like he wanted to. Instead, he watched her as she braced herself on his chest, his own hands gripping her hips as she slowly lowered herself down on him, inch by inch.

He forced his eyes to remain open despite the pleasure that coursed through him when he was finally deep inside of her. Beth's eyes glazed over and her mouth dropped open in a low moan, but she didn't break eye-contact with him either.

Beth couldn't ever remember feeling so full as she lowered herself down on Daryl. He stretched her in a way that she would never have expected, but she knew that she would never be able to get enough of. There was no pain, just a dull ache that she assumed was from not having done this in such a long time, but even that was welcome. Everything she felt when she was around Daryl was welcome in her mind. She couldn't get enough of staring into his eyes though. It was clear that he was struggling to stay still and she wanted to move, but she wasn't sure  _how_ . Experimentally, she lifted herself just a little and then lowered herself again, feeling his member moving inside of her, creating a pleasurable friction, making her moan.

Daryl's hands tightened on her hips and he lifted his upper body so that he could wrap his arms around her and press his forehead against hers again. “Best be still for just a moment, woman,” he told her. “We don't want this endin' 'fore it even begins. 'S been a while.”

Beth nodded, understanding now why he hadn't moved at first. She claimed his lips and he buried his hand in her hair while his other remained wrapped around her, hugging her close to his body. A moment later, she felt him moving his own hips a little after finally gathering himself enough so that he wouldn't come the second she moved. Beth lifted herself again, halfway this time before moving down on him again. She repeated the move a few times, feeling heat flare up deep inside her core as she did. Daryl laid back down again, Beth moving with him so that their kiss wouldn't break as she continued to lift her hips and then slam them down again, pleasure coursing through her every time.

After a few more thrusts upwards, Daryl knew that he wouldn't be able to last too long. He just wanted Beth to reach her peak before him so as he found a rhythm with her, meeting her half-way with every stroke she made downward, he moved his hand to her core again, his fingers finding her clit and rubbing against it. Beth gasped at the heightened sensation, head pooling and the muscles in her lower abdomen tightening. She knew what it felt like to be close to climax because she had pushed herself over that edge a couple of times when she had been alone and she knew now too that she was close.

She moaned against Daryl's lips, repeating his name over and over again as he stroked that fire deep within her. The storm was still going on outside but the only thing she was able to hear was their skin slapping against each other, their pants, gasps, and moans. The coldness was gone and the heat from the small fireplace was nothing compared to the heat that she and Daryl were creating, making sweat bead at her forehead, a drop of it rolling down between her breasts. Daryl's hair was sticking to his forehead as well and she couldn't think of a moment that she had seen him look more vulnerable.

The sounds she was making made him feel lightheaded. He almost couldn't believe that this was actually happening; that he was connected with Beth in one of the most intimate ways. He had dreamed about this so many times, but nothing compared to the real thing. Daryl could feel her inner walls clenching around him and he knew that she was close. He moved his fingers in tighter circles, putting just a little more pressure and when Beth tensed above him and threw her head back, he knew he had done what he had wanted to all night long. She was still moving against him, but when he felt her slowing down, he gripped her hips and as smoothly as he could – which surprised even him considering how badly his legs were shaking – turned them over so that he was on top of her. Beth's legs wrapped around him as he drove into her faster and harder than before. She gasped and let out small whimpers, still sensitive from her orgasm and before either of them knew it, she was coming again. That second wave of euphoria was what finally pushed Daryl over the edge. He felt himself tensing inside of her and he pulled out just in time to spill himself over her thigh. Beth was watching him as he did, feeling his hot cum slipping between her legs and down on the leather couch. After finally emptying himself, Daryl tried to catch his breath before reaching down, grabbing the boxers he had been wearing before to wipe his cum off of Beth. He knew that he was blushing furiously, but it had been the only reasonable thing to do considering that they didn't have any protection. After cleaning her up the best he could, he finally looked at her face only to be met by a look of complete adoration and content. The sweat that was still glistening on her bare body seemed to reflect the flickering light that was coming from the fireplace and it made her look like some kind of ethereal being that he knew he would love and worship until the day that he died.

Beth brushed her fingers against the side of his face, pushing back his soaked hair before pulling him down. She turned slightly on her side so that he could settle behind her and Daryl reached down again, this time to bring up her long ago discarded blanket, throwing it over their naked bodies. At first he couldn't help but calculate the risks in his head, but then he knew that they would be safe for tonight at least. The door was secured and so were the windows. He heard thunder rumble outside which told him that the storm was far from over, but the one that had been brewing between him and Beth for over a week, was. He nuzzled her cheek softly with his nose and Beth turned her head so that he could kiss her again. A few more pecks and Daryl could feel tiredness finally setting in. He wrapped his arm around Beth's middle and her hand rested on top of his. She kissed him a few more times before finally just settling against him and closing her eyes.

Daryl kissed her shoulder, smiling against it as he too felt his eyelids get heavier.

Both of them fell into a dreamless sleep for the first time in over a week, content and happy.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Hides behind couch* Be kind and thank you for reading! xx


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning everything has changed, but things take another turn when Daryl makes a confession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! This is a quick little note before you read this chapter! I am so sorry for taking so long to update and I haven't properly spell-checked this one, so I'm warning you beforehand that any small mistakes are mine and due to not having time... Either way, I'm working every day, which has made it hard to find time to write, but I've managed to get in an hour or so every other day since I came back from my vacation.
> 
> Also, I'm sorry that I haven't been able to get back to all of your comments, but I promise that I'll be better with the ones you give me for this chapter (if you give me any, that is :P). I'm off to work in about ten minutes, so I'm just gonna warn you that this chapter is also for mature readers only and that's that.
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

# Chapter 26

Beth couldn't remember ever feeling this warm and content in the morning. She could feel something heavy laying over her waist, but it was a good weight that made her feel safe in this world where safety was rare. For a couple of minutes, she just laid still, not wanting to disrupt the good feeling in her gut. Actually, it wasn't just her gut. Her entire body felt unlike anything it had ever felt before. Memories from the previous night flooded her mind and slowly, Beth's eyes began to flutter open as she recalled every touch, every stroke, every kiss that she and Daryl had shared.

Her cheeks felt warm, but a smile still spread over her face as she bit her lip. She glanced down and recognized that it was Daryl's arm that was so casually slung over her waist, holding her pressed tightly against him and it made her smile even wider. Her back was against his chest and she could feel him pressing against her backside, but she knew that he probably wasn't even awake yet.

She laid silently and listened to the rain that seemed to still be falling outside. There was no thunder though, so the worst part of the storm – the part that they had completely drowned out when they had been drowning in each other last night, Beth realized with another blush – had passed. It didn't change the fact that the two of them probably wouldn't be able to head back to the farmhouse until it stopped raining completely because they wouldn't want to ruin their clothes again.

Slowly – so that she wouldn't wake Daryl – Beth slid out of his arms and off of the couch. They had both fallen asleep naked last night and now that the fire had died down in the fireplace and Daryl's warm body was no longer wrapped around her, Beth felt her nude skin prickle as the cold air in the cabin hit her. She looked around the floor and ignored the way her face heated up when she spotted Daryl's boxers that he had used to wipe his cum off of her last night. Instead, her eyes settled on the shirt that she had been wearing the night before and she began to reach for it when she instead noticed Daryl's that was laying a little further away. Glancing at the still sleeping man on the couch, Beth smiled to herself and tip-toed to the shirt before grabbing it and pulling it over her head. It fit her like a short dress, but the familiar scent of Daryl made her feel enveloped with heat and safety again. It hung loosely over her shoulder, but Beth figured that her own shirt had done the exact same thing so it didn't matter. She couldn't see her underwear anywhere, but she figured she could put on a clean pair once she got the fire in the fireplace started again and ate something because her stomach was feeling empty.

As she knelt down in front of the fireplace and silently lit a small fire, her mind continued to play out everything that had happened the night before and despite that, a part of her wondered if it could all just have been a dream – A _very good_ dream. She remembered how the two of them had moved against each other and how it had felt like coming home. The things that Daryl had admitted before everything though, that he had mourned her and that she had been the girl that he had been falling for back then, made it all the more special. For Beth it had felt like months of tension between the two of them finally coming to head and it had been a collision that she would have never really expected, even though it made a lot of sense. She knew that what she felt for Daryl was different than what she felt for everyone else. So last night when she had been the one to kiss him first, she hadn't even thought about what the consequences might be. The urge to just go for it had become too much for her and she had kissed him like her life depended on it. When she had pulled back, horrified by the fact that he hadn't responded, she was worried that she might have made the biggest mistake of her life. Then, Daryl had proved her wrong and pulled her in again and things between the two of them had changed forever.

Beth watched the small fire burning for another moment and then stood up again, her eyes drifting to Daryl who was still laying on the couch. The blanket that the two of them had been covered with had pooled down to gather around his hips and she noticed goosebumps beginning to appear on his arms. She moved silently toward him and covered him better with it, praying silently that he wouldn't wake up just yet. Beth knew that she hadn't been able to sleep at all during the week that the two of them hadn't been talking and she knew that Daryl most likely hadn't been better off. He needed to rest and Beth knew that once she got something to eat, she would try and join him on the couch again.

After all, it was still raining and it wasn't as if they would just be able to run around in the rain again. Beth smiled to herself, silently imagining all the things they could do to pass the time.

* * *

The moment Beth had slipped out of his arms, Daryl had woken up. It had taken him a second to actually acknowledge what it was that had happened between the two of them the night before and once he had, he had felt a smile tugging on his lips. For the first time in a long, long time, Daryl Dixon was _happy_. No, it wasn't because he had gotten to have sex after a long, _long_ time, but rather the fact that he had told Beth the truth and she hadn't pushed him away like he had thought she would. She knew now that she was the girl he had told her about, the girl that he had been falling for, and she hadn't been disgusted by him or yelled at him for being a pervert or whatever. Instead, she had been the one to kiss him first; she had been the one to make that first step into something else, something _new._ It was a step that Daryl was sure that he would have never dared to take on his own and because of that, he was glad that Beth was a lot stronger and braver than she might look when one first sets eyes on her.

When Beth had gotten up, Daryl hadn't even opened her eyes, knowing very well that she was still nude. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable though at the same time he wondered how he could considering what they had done the night before. Yet, he respected her more than enough to not just sneak a peek at her and he had instead opted for listening to her as she moved around the room, still keeping his eyes closed and breath even. After a few minutes he felt the familiar heat of a small fire being lit in the fireplace and he realized then as goosebumps spread over his arms and his chest that the blanket they had been covered with wasn't covering the upper part of his body. Beth beat him to bringing it back up again when he felt her close and then felt her delicate hands pull the blanket up again and he did his best to just keep his eyes closed as her hands lingered for a mere moment.

He was aware though. He was  _oh so_ aware of the small pressure of her hand against his shoulder. Daryl almost berated himself and his body for having such a reaction to such an innocent touch by the young woman. She had obviously intended to be caring, while he was growing hard under the blanket, clearly wanting to show how he cared in other ways. Of course, he wasn't sure if Beth would even want a repeat of last night, but Daryl figured they could take things as they came.

Daryl listened intently as Beth moved through the room toward the small kitchenette. She was taking something out of one of their backpacks, that much was clear and as his eyes began fluttering open, he heard something else that instantly warmed his heart.

Beth was  _humming_ .

She was actually humming a tune to a song that he would recognize anywhere. It was the song that had been imprinted in his memory since the funeral home, where she had sat by the piano and sung him to sleep. He closed his eyes, feeling tears stinging. There was no point in getting his hopes up that she was remembering something – that last night might have triggered her brain into remembering – and he knew that she probably just knew the song from when he had hummed it to her after they had been attacked the first time in that mall a few months ago.

Still, her humming was like a siren's song and Daryl knew that he couldn't just keep pretending to be asleep. As quietly as possible, he lifted his head to look over at her, only to see her opening a can of conserved peaches. He watched her as she took a bite out of one half and realized then that she was wearing  _his_ shirt from last night. That had to mean  _something_ , at least, didn't it? Daryl slowly stood up from the bed, keeping the blanket wrapped securely around his middle. Beth had already seen every broken part of him, so there was no point in hiding his scars from her anymore. Besides, he felt comfortable around her and he cared about her more than he had ever cared about anyone before.

As he walked toward her, a tear slipped down his cheek. He wasn't able to hide the fact that her humming was affecting him in more ways than one. Just knowing that a part of the old her was still inside of her, along with the new amazing young woman that she had grown into these past few months, was overwhelming. Daryl came to a stop behind her, closing his eyes as he leaned his head down to rest his forehead against her shoulder. He felt Beth tense for a mere millisecond before she relaxed, taking a step back, into him instead of moving away. Daryl's hands moved to her hips, touching them tentatively over the fabric of her shirt as he took a deep breath, nuzzling her neck.

Beth let out a small giggle before turning around in his arms, looking up at him as she popped another peach inside her mouth. “Good morning,” she told him, almost playfully before noticing how emotional he looked. “What's wrong?” she asked, sounding worried.

Daryl reached up and brushed away a strand of her blonde hair away from her face before cupping her cheek. Slowly, he leaned in, giving her a chance to back away from him. When she didn't move, he pressed his mouth against hers lightly, tracing her lips with his tongue, tasting the peach that she had been eating. Beth hummed in approval, opening her mouth and giving him access to tangle his tongue with hers. For a while, they just stood there: tongues moving languidly against each other, one of his hands gripping her shirt –  _his_ shirt that she was wearing – and his other cupping her face while she still held the can of peaches between them.

He stroked her cheek lightly, his calloused fingertips moving across her face as if he was still checking if she was real.

And she was.

“We probably should have used the bedroom last night,” Beth whispered against his mouth when they finally broke apart. Daryl could feel her hot breath against his lips.

“We could always use it now,” Daryl found himself suggesting, without even thinking. He wondered if he had crossed some line, but his worries faded away the second that Beth grinned up at him, already putting the can of peaches on the counter.

“I think that is the best idea I've ever had the pleasure of hearing, Mr. Dixon,” Beth smiled as her hands moved to the blanket that he had secured around his hips. He didn't shy away when she loosened it and let it fall to the floor, but he did feel his cheeks heat up when the blonde glanced down at his already hard member.

“You're crazy,” he told her, shaking his head, but still a smile tugged at his lips as he trailed his hands down her back, to the hem of her shirt before he pulled it up and off of her body. Beth raised her arms and the second she stood nude before him again, she didn't waste any time, opting to jump up, wrapping her legs around his naked waist. There seemed to be no reservations between them anymore.

“But I'm your kind of crazy, right?” she grinned at him as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He held her up and couldn't help but grin back at her.

“Yeah,” he agreed, “you are.”

Daryl held on to her tightly, his hands on her back as she kissed him again. Somehow, he began moving, never tearing his lips away from hers as he moved them from the living room to the small bedroom that he had seen her changing in earlier that night.

They ended up on the bed rather quickly and Daryl's heart felt just a little bit warmer when Beth let out an actual laugh after they literally stumbled down on top of it. His worries that he might have crushed her disappeared when she pulled him closer, tangling her fingers in his hair, kissing him with more fervor than ever.

They kissed as if they would never be able to kiss each other again, even though they both knew that whatever it was between them had just begun and neither of them wanted it ever to end. Beth was on her back and Daryl was laying over her, using his hands as leverage so that he wouldn't crush her lithe frame. Beth's kept her arms wrapped around him, trying to pull him closer, but Daryl only traced her side with his palm slowly, committing every inch of her to his memory.

“ _Daryl_ ,” Beth breathed out in a moan when he began pressing kisses down the column of her throat, to her clavicle, down between her breasts and even further down. Every now and then, he nibbled at her skin, making her gasp and tremble, her fingers buried deep in his hair, pressing him against her body which was slowly forming a thin layer of sweat the more things between them heated up.

“Wanna see ya,” Daryl murmured against her taut stomach, looking up at her with hooded and lust-filled eyes. “Will ya let me?” he wondered, his voice huskier than before.

Beth stared back at him and almost instantly, she spread her legs, biting her lip in the process. She couldn't remember ever being this intimate with someone, but Daryl was  _Daryl_ and she loved–

Beth gasped when Daryl trailed his fingers through her dark blonde curls. The coarse hair was already moist and Beth couldn't help but look down at the man who was staring almost hungrily down at her.

“Wanna taste ya too,” Daryl admitted, sounding almost sheepish about it all. He met her eyes, clearly asking her for permission again and Beth gave it to him by only spreading her legs further apart.

Ever so slowly, Beth watched as Daryl moved downwards, his hands trailing over her thighs, down to her knees before placing her legs over his shoulders. Beth gasped when she felt his hot breath against her wet skin and when he used his fingers to spread her apart before taking a small lick, she couldn't help but groan out his name again, tightening her grip on his hair as she pushed his face closer to her.

It was a kind of pleasure she had never experienced before, that much she was sure of. Daryl's tongue circled her clit as he continued to spread her with his fingers and began to rub her with just a little more pressure. It didn't take much more than him actually sucking on her sensitive bundle of nerves while pressing hid middle finger into her for her to break apart completely underneath him.

He lapped up her juices as she moaned and writhed beneath him, gasping his name, pulling him closer. When Beth's grip on him began loosening slightly, and her legs stopped trembling, Daryl hummed against her again before kissing her hipbones and moving up her body, leaving a trail of her own slickness over her body. When he kissed her then, Beth found that she loved tasting herself on him and she couldn't help but wonder whether he would feel the same if she ever decided to return the favor, which she was more than sure that she would.

“I need you,” Beth said against his lips.

“We ain't goin' anywhere yet, Beth,” Daryl returned, kissing her harder. “Ain't gonna be able to get back 'til the rain stops anyway.”

“Are you suggestin' we stay in bed all day long?” Beth smiled at him, kissing him deeply again.

Daryl moved his hand to her knee before lifting her leg over his hip, slowly pressing into her, feeling her inner walls contract around him, almost as if they were welcoming him home.

“Does that sound good to ya, Ms. Greene?” Daryl teased, smirking down at her, making a great effort to not just start moving inside of her. This was different for him too. Being playful and teasing with his partner. Usually, before the Outbreak, it was always about getting a physical release – a quick fuck – than actually getting to know and having fun with it all. With Beth though, everything he had never thought he would have or be able to do, he was getting and doing.

“God, _yes_ ,” Beth hissed out as he pulled out of her, only to thrust back into her, hard and quick. They moved in unison, just like they had the first time they had slept together and once again, it didn't take long for Daryl to feel that familiar tightening. He knew that it would take a few times for him to be able to last longer, but as long as he made Beth reach her peak at least once before he actually entered her, he figured that it would be okay.

“What are ya– _Fuck_ ,” Daryl groaned, looking down as Beth's fingers moved down to where he was pounding into her. She began pressing against herself, moaning in his ear for him to go harder and faster, but all he could do was stare down at where his dick entered her pussy and her fingers rubbed along to a rhythm that he couldn't quite place. It didn't take much longer for him and when he finally felt himself tense, he pulled out of her warmth and spilled his seed on the sheet next to her body. He didn't close his eyes though, because Beth was still whimpering at the loss of him and furiously moving her fingers against herself. Daryl gathered himself enough to reach down and help her, pressing two fingers into her and curling them upwards, making Beth arch her back off the bed and gasp. She shut her eyes tightly, her breath coming out in short quick pants as he moved his fingers inside of her and she pressed down on her clit with her own thumb. Soon enough, Daryl watched her come apart in front of him again and he was sure that he had never seen a more beautiful sight.

Beth shook and trembled as he continued to move his fingers inside of her, letting her enjoy her orgasm for as long as possible while she clutched the bedsheets.

“That was amazing,” Beth finally panted when she came down from her high, turning on the bed so that she could face Daryl. He watched her as he placed his fingers in his mouth, tasting her again, loving how she was looking at him. “You're amazing,” Beth continued, pushing back his damp hair.

“We should get some more sleep,” Daryl told her before leaning down to kiss her lightly again, deciding that they had done so much together already that it was most likely okay for him to kiss her whenever he wanted.

“Mhmm...” Beth hummed against his lips. “Did you really mean that we'll stay here until the rain stops?” Beth wondered then. “That might take all day.”

“An' we can't walk 'round the woods at night,” Daryl pointed out.

“So we'll probably be stuck here for another twenty-four hours,” Beth sighed, moving closer to him. “We'll just have to find a way to pass the time, I suppose.”

Daryl only grinned at her before pressing another kiss to her lips, then her cheek, then her collarbone. “Just go to sleep, Beth,” he instructed her. “Ya need rest.”

“If you say so,” Beth yawned, draping her bare leg over his hip again, throwing her arm lazily around his middle. Daryl reached for the blanket and pulled it over them, just like he had done last night. Beth looked up at him through her lashes, a small frown on her face. “Remind me that I need to change the sheets before we leave.”

Daryl let out a low chuckle, pressing his lips to her forehead as he pulled her closer. “Sleep, Beth,” he repeated, closing his own eyes the moment he felt her drifting off.

* * *

When Daryl woke up again a couple of hours later, he could still hear the rain falling outside. It was chilly in the room, but he had never felt warmer, because Beth was still asleep in his arms. He loved having her there, her bare skin against his, and he only shifted slightly so that he could look down at her relaxed face. Her hair had gotten curled and frizzy after both being in the rain yesterday and getting sweaty from their _activities_.

Daryl smiled to himself, brushing away a loose curl from her face, unable to _not_ think about how everything was different now. The fact that Beth was actually alive and well and in his arms was one of the most amazing things that had ever happened to him. He would never have believed that a day like this would come, but he was glad that it had.

He thought back to those seven months when he had felt like one of those dead walkers. The nightmares that he had of her death were still somewhere in the back of his head, but since he had been reunited with her, they had been less frequent. After the two of them had begun growing closer again, they had become almost none-existent, but he still remembered.

Daryl remembered, seeing her in that hallway when he and the rest of his family had come to rescue her and Carol. He remembered, seeing her walk towards him and needing to touch her to make sure that she was safe and lead her back to safety. He remembered it like it was yesterday, when she went back and stabbed dawn in the shoulder, when the gun went off and when all he could see was red and all he could taste was her blood on his lips.

He remembered the ringing in his own ears after he killed dawn and the touch of Carol's hand against his shoulder and the sight he was met by when he finally looked down at her lifeless body.

He had cried over it; cried over _her_ , in front of everyone.

Daryl looked at Beth now where she lay, her eyes closed and her face relaxed. She was even snoring softly and he realized that this was something that was almost too good to be true. Her surviving that shot was a one in a million thing and it felt as if something would happen again and she would be snatched away from him, now that he finally had her with him.

Not being able to help himself, he leaned down and pressed his lips against her forehead, closing his eyes and savoring the moment. He didn't know how long they would have together, because eventually something was sure to go wrong or one of them would die because the world was a dark place after all. But he would be damned if he let her die in front of him ever again and he knew that he would protect her with his own life.

* * *

Beth opened her eyes the moment she felt Daryl's lips against her forehead. When he pulled away from her, she looked up at him and her breath hitched at the look of sadness and fear that she could see in his intense blue eyes. But it wasn't only that though, there was something else there as well.

“What's wrong, Daryl?” she whispered to him, asking him the same question that she had before they had ended up in bed together again. She reached up and cupped his cheek. He let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes, leaning into her touch once more.

“Never thought I'd see ya again,” he murmured after a while. “After ya got shot... I was comin' to get ya and ya got shot in front of me.”

Beth was surprised by his honesty. She was yet to hear the full story of how she had been presumed to be dead and gotten her memories wiped clean. “Do you wanna tell me about it?” she wondered, her curiosity getting the better of her.

“If ya wanna know, I'll tell ya,” Daryl said, but Beth could tell from the sound of his voice that he'd rather not re-live the incident again.

“Maybe one day,” Beth said, leaning up to slant her lips over his in a soft kiss.

“S'just that bein' here with ya makes me wanna tell ya everythin',” Daryl admitted. “At the same time, it's too... _Painful_ to get into all at once.” Daryl turned away from her and laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling. Beth lifted herself up on her elbow and looked down at him.

“So don't tell me everything then,” Beth suggested. “Tell me a story, Daryl. A small one every day and be honest with me. That way I'll get to hear it and you'll get to talk about it.”

Daryl's eyes flickered over to meet hers. “Ya want me to continue with the stories?” he asked her.

Beth nodded, “But this time without censorship.” His lips twitched at her comment and she couldn't help but lean down to kiss him again. “Tell me about your tattoo. The lowercase ' _b_ '.”

Almost instantly, Daryl reached up and touched the small mark on his chest, not even having to look at where it was.

“Wanted to get your whole name in,” he told her. “We were just passin' through some small town an' I saw a tattoo parlor. The thought just crossed my mind and before I knew it I was breakin' in, lookin' for needles an' ink. Didn't even get the B finished before walkers began fillin' the streets and we had to get outta there... I just bandaged myself up quickly and tried to hide that I was a lil' sore, but I know that Michonne noticed.”

“She's so observant,” Beth noted, silently wondering whether the woman would be able to sense somehow what she and Daryl had been doing with each other these past few hours.

“Yeah,” Daryl drawled absentmindedly as Beth began tracing the tattoo that was supposed to have been her name, but his grip on her tightened a little.

“You ever regret never going back to finish the tattoo?” Beth asked.

“Nah,” Daryl shook his head. “Think it might be better like this. You were my–” he cut himself off abruptly, making Beth frown at him.

“I was your what?” she wanted to know.

“My secret,” he finally answered after another moment of silence. “No one knew how I felt about ya. Not even I did until I had lost ya.”

Beth looked at him, contemplating what he had just shared. She understood him much better now. She understood his hesitance to get close to her and let her in, even though she was happy that she had finally been able to break down that wall of his. The way he had talked about her before, under the disguise that it was some other girl, proved to her that he had indeed felt something deeper for her before she had been thought to be dead. She wanted to know more, but she knew that they needed to take things in small steps.

“When we were alone before,” Beth began slowly, still tracing the small tattoo on his chest, “did anything ever happen between us?”

“Like this?” Daryl asked.

“Anything,” Beth replied, looking up to meet his gaze.

Daryl eyed her for a good moment in silence before finally shaking his head. “Nothin' like this,” he said. “Ya just called me out on my bullshit and... Well, it was just _us_ for a while.” He reached up and touched the scar on her cheek. “Then they took ya from me, right before I could tell ya that ya were startin' to change my mind on the way the world was...”

“And when you saw me again...?” Beth trailed off when she saw hurt flash in Daryl's eyes.

“I saw ya die,” he whispered, his voice so low that she had barely heard him. “Ya don't know how much it hurt, Beth. I-I couldn't feel anythin' for weeks after I buried ya... Before I put ya in that coffin, I couldn't stop... I couldn't stop _cryin_ '. Later, it was the numbness that became unbearable.”

Beth grasped his hand in hers and her thumb found the small circular burn mark that she recalled him telling her about. She raised his hand to her lips and kissed the rough skin there. Her chest tightened a little when Daryl let out a ragged breath, his hand that was still on her hip squeezing her a little harder. Beth couldn't help herself anymore. Seeing Daryl like this and finally understanding that all those times that he had told her about the girl he had cared about so deeply, he had in fact been talking about her.

“You are an amazing man, Daryl Dixon,” Beth said, swallowing thickly when she felt her own emotions getting the best of her. Just knowing that he had cared so deeply for her that he hadn't been able to feel anything other than pain when she had been presumed to be dead, was making her feel things that she didn't know for sure if she should be feeling. She knew that she loved him now, but she wasn't sure where he stood or where they were going to stand when they returned to the farmhouse.

But right now, she didn't want to think about all of that. All she wanted to do was show Daryl just how much she cared about him and how much she hoped that he cared for her too. She wanted him to know just how grateful she was for having him in her life again and that she didn't regret anything that had happened between them the night before or today.

Without thinking much about it, Beth threw her leg over Daryl's hip and rolled over on top of him so that she was straddling him. The blanket that had been covering her fell off and pooled by her hips, exposing her breasts as she placed both of her hands on Daryl's chest. His grip on her hips tightened slightly and she couldn't help but notice how his eyes didn't stray from her face, which actually made her love him just a little bit more. Everything that was happening between them wasn't just some kind of physical release. It was about him and her and  _them_ .

She needed him close and she knew that he could tell that too. There would be no time for any kind of foreplay because she was ready for him already and she didn't want to waste any time. Shifting slightly on top of him, she reached down between them and took his hardening member in her hand. After stroking him a couple of times Daryl reached down on his own and covered her hand with his, showing her how much pressure to put on him and soon enough, he was letting out small groans of pleasure. Beth didn't even warn him when she placed him at her entrance and sunk down on him, and Daryl seemed to be so surprised by the sudden change that he actually gasped and bit his lip, closing his eyes tightly. Perhaps he was struggling to hold on, but Beth knew that it wouldn't even matter to her if she got her release this time. He had already done so much for her that all she wanted was for him to let go and she wanted him to be inside of her when he did.

“I want you to stay inside me when you cum,” she said, sharing her thoughts with him.

“Ain't safe,” he protested through gritted teeth.

“We'll be fine,” Beth told him. “I promise. There's no risk of me getting'– _Oh!_ ” Beth's mouth hung open when Daryl suddenly lifted her slightly off of him and snapped his hips up, thrusting deep inside of her. Grabbing a hold of his shoulders, Beth began moving on top of him, meeting his thrusts while rolling her hips down on him, never breaking eye-contact with him.

“Beth, I ain't gonna...” Daryl trailed off.

“It's okay,” Beth insisted. “This is for you.”

The moment she spoke those words, Daryl lifted his upper half off the bed, wrapping his arms around her like he had done that first time they had slept together. They moved together slower than before and Beth began feeling that familiar burning sensation in her lower parts. There was a fluttering in her stomach and she understood that maybe she  _would_ be able to find release again. Daryl slowed her movements down to an almost painful pace, forcing her to raise herself off of him slowly and then thrust up into her hard. Everything she was feeling only became heightened the longer he drew it out, but she was enjoying herself so much that she couldn't ask him to stop.

He held her tightly around her waist and her arms were wrapped around his neck, her lips close to his ear so that he could hear every moan she let out because of him. She wanted him to hear it all and she told him as much, brushing her lips against the shell of his ear.

When Daryl finally erupted inside of her, his pleasure became so intense that Beth gasped, finding her own release along with him, even though she hadn't really expected it. They leaned their foreheads against each other and panted, coming down from their high, still joined together. Daryl's hand found its way up her back and wove itself into her dampened blond tresses, tangling between his fingers before he pulled her down so that he could claim her lips in a small, but passionate kiss.

Beth smiled against him as she realized that she never wanted to let him go and that for the first time in a long time, she was genuinely happy.

* * *

A comfortable silence surrounded them as they trekked through the forest the next morning. Some weaker trees had fallen over due to the storm and the ground was wet which made it all slippery as they climbed over trunks and stepped over lifted roots. Daryl walked two steps behind Beth, his crossbow held high and ready to be fired at any passing walkers while Beth led the way carefully, a throwing knife in each hand. They had already taken down a couple of walkers who had seemed to have been drawn in by the storm, but up until now there hadn't really been a greater amount of them which would somehow be able to endanger the farm.

They had gotten up a bit earlier this morning, after having spent most of yesterday in bed together. No, they hadn't been having sex _all the time_ but rather slept and rested as well as eaten and talked about everything and nothing. Of course, _had_ had sex too, and Beth couldn't say that she hadn't enjoyed it immensely.

Either way, they knew that once the rain stopped, they really didn't have a real reason to stick around the cabin. They needed to get back to the farmhouse because Beth knew for sure that Maggie at least would be worried sick about them if they stayed away for another day. So, after waking up this morning, they had enjoyed another few moments of just laying together in bed, their naked skin pressing against each other. Soon enough though, Daryl had told her that they needed to get going and Beth had been the first one get out of bed, but not before kissing Daryl. She had gotten dressed slowly, knowing very well that he was watching her from where he was still laying and she had smiled to herself when she had once again felt his arms wrap around her when he too got up. He had pressed a single kiss to the side of her neck, nuzzling it like he had done in the kitchen the morning before and while he had gotten around to changing, Beth had changed the sheets on the bed, blushing slightly when she had seen Daryl's amused face.

They cleaned up the cabin a bit and got dressed in their now dry clothes before locking up behind them and heading out. There was no need for them to rush and the two of them figured that since they hadn't actually been able to hunt anything, they could go slower and hope to come across some animal at least, even though it seemed like the storm had forced all the critters to hide away in their safe places.

Neither of them had talked about what they were officially, but both knew that they were something. Beth knew what she felt for Daryl and she was sure that he felt something at least for her too. They were getting closer and closer to the farmhouse and the only thing Beth found herself thinking about was how she wished she and Daryl could just go away somewhere and be alone for a while.

Once they finally reached the clearing before the big field that belonged to the farmland, Beth was startled when she felt Daryl wrap his strong hand around her wrist, halting her movements. She turned around to face him, looking at him confusedly, only to see that he had draped his crossbow over his shoulder once more and was looking down at her lips before flickering up to meet her eyes again. For a moment, Beth didn't understand that he was actually asking her a question, but then she realized that this was his only chance to actually kiss her out in the open without having someone in the family stumble upon them.

“Are you really askin' me for permission?” Beth wondered, her lips tugging up in a small smile. Daryl's cheeks heated up at her question and he offered her a curt nod. “You don't ever need to ask, Daryl.”

Slowly, still a bit hesitantly despite her words, Daryl reached out and brushed his knuckles against her cheek. Beth let out a low breath when his calloused fingertips touched the scar on her cheek again before settling on the side of her neck, thumb brushing against the curve of her jaw before finally coming to rest on the back of her neck. His fingers tangled in her hair as he leaned down, bringing his mouth down to hers, connecting their lips once more.

Beth kissed him back softly, knowing that this was not a kiss goodbye because this thing between them was far from over. Still, she wanted to savor this last moment she had with him before they would be crowded by the rest of their family. Who knew when they would have another moment completely alone like this?

Daryl stayed close to her even after they broke apart, his hand staying buried in her hair while his other traced from her shoulder down to her elbow, coming to rest there for a moment before traveling downwards so that he could lace their fingers together. Beth smiled at him and squeezed his hand lightly before pecking him one last time on the lips, her heart warming when she felt Daryl's own lips twitch up into a small smile underneath hers.

* * *

The rest of their family welcomed them home with hugs and love. Turned out that they hadn't been  _that_ worried about them, knowing that they could both take care of themselves out there in the woods. Maggie though seemed to have been the one who had been worried the most, but Beth assumed that that too had something to do with her hormones due to being pregnant and all that.

Beth had told Daryl to have a shower before her so that she could sit with her sister for a bit and assure her that she was absolutely fine. The two Greene sisters were in Beth's room while Beth unpacked and re-packed her emergency exit backpack, making sure that she had everything that was needed in case something went wrong. Her mind kept going back to the cabin and all the things she and Daryl had done for the past forty-eight hours. There seemed to be a permanent smile etched on her face and she had to bite her lip hard so that she wouldn't be outright grinning in front of Maggie.

Still, it seemed like her sister had immediately sensed that something was different because after about ten minutes, Maggie said, “You and Daryl seem to have made up.”

Beth faltered in her packing for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, we talked things over,” she admitted, not really knowing how much she should be sharing with Maggie. While she wanted to keep things that had happened between her and Daryl private, she also needed to talk to someone about it. She doubted that Morgan would enjoy listening to how she'd had raging hot sex with Daryl while he and the others had been waiting for the two of them to come back home to them and besides, Maggie was her  _sister_ . Sisters were supposed to talk about stuff like this, weren't they?

“We slept together.” The words slipped right out of Beth's mouth before she could stop them and then she turned around to look at Maggie, who was sitting on Beth's bed with a small smile on her face.

“That's so sweet,” Maggie said. “I knew that once you two were alone you wouldn't be able to not talk. I bet it was really cold out there and you've slept in the same bed before, so–”

“No, Maggie,” Beth cut her off, biting her lip. “We _slept_ together,” she repeated, emphasizing the word so that her sister would understand. She watched Maggie's face go from confused, to completely blank, to surprised and shocked.

“You guys _had_ _sex_?” Maggie hissed out in a whisper, leaning forward so that Beth would hear her more clearly. Beth nodded, tasting blood in her mouth from biting it too hard. “Oh my God,” Maggie said, covering her mouth, but there seemed to be an almost delighted glow in her eyes. “I need to know _everything_ that happened. Details please and how was it?”

Beth gave her sister a skeptical look. “Do you really think I'm going to tell you everything?” she wondered.

“No, but at least tell me if it was any good,” Maggie shrugged. “I've been holed up in this house for days while you've been out there in the woods sexing it up with Daryl Dixon.”

“We weren't ' _sexing it up_ ',” Beth blushed. “It was more like a...falling together or something.”

“So it was good?”

“Maggie!” Beth giggled, shaking her head before looking down. Her sister chuckled as well, but Beth shrugged. “I don't exactly have anything to compare it to since I don't remember ever sleeping with anyone before, but yeah, it was good. _Really_ good.”

Maggie made an 'aw-ing' sound, tilting her head to look at her sister. “I'm so happy that you've made up,” Maggie said. “Seeing the two of you pretending to ignore each other like that was painful for everyone, especially when we knew that neither of you actually wanted to be apart. But there's one thing I have to ask...” Maggie trailed off and before she even spoke again, Beth knew what her sister was thinking about because her hand had gone to her own stomach where her child was growing.

“No, we didn't use any protection,” Beth said. “But we'll be okay. I haven't had my period in months and well... I'd rather not get into the details of everything we did.” Her face felt hot but she kept her head held high.

Maggie hummed, but continued to look as concerned as before and Beth couldn't exactly say that she didn't blame her. After all, it would be enough of a struggle with one of them being pregnant and they hardly needed another baby to worry about. Beth knew that what she and Daryl had done hadn't exactly been responsible, but at least Daryl had pulled out most of the time. Though she knew they needed to be careful from now on.

“So are you and Daryl official now or what?” Maggie wondered after a moment of silence.

“I don't know,” Beth admitted. “We didn't exactly talk about what we are now.”

“Hmm,” Maggie hummed again, giving Beth another look, scrunching her nose up. “Either way, I'll be giving the two of you my stash of condoms, since Glenn and I clearly won't be needing them anymore and you will.”

Beth looked at her sister for a moment before bursting into giggles. Maggie watched her and slowly a grin formed on her own face. The two sisters sat together, laughing and talking and for the moment, everything felt fine.

* * *

Daryl lit his cigarette, sitting on the porch with his crossbow on the ground between his feet. He took a drag from the light, exhaling the smoke through his nose while letting the cigarette hang between his lips, eyeing the dark space before him.

He had wanted to keep watch tonight despite everyone telling him that he didn't need to. The walls were secure again and he had been out there in the woods for the past two days with Beth, so apparently he needed his rest. Daryl protested though, telling everyone that he couldn't sleep anyway and that he wanted to give the rest of them a chance to get some shut-eye. From what Daryl could tell, no one suspected that anything was different between him and Beth. Sure, they could all probably tell that they had made up while they had been alone, but he didn't think anyone could sense the fact that they had spent most of the past two nights in bed together, doing things that were far from innocent.

There was one thing he did know though and that was that Maggie had been giving him some looks over dinner that made him suspect that she might have talked to Beth. Although, there was no chance for him to know exactly what the sisters had been saying, so he didn't want to risk giving anything away by saying something to Maggie.

Not that he _would_ say anything to her, or anyone.

Besides, he was fairly sure that Michonne knew too. That woman just _knew_ stuff and never needed anyone to tell her anything because her observational skills were quite astounding. Either way, Daryl found himself sitting on the porch alone, deep in thoughts over how everything had changed in such a short amount of time for him.

“Hey.”

Goosebumps prickled his skin the moment he heard her soft voice and he didn't even turn around to look at her when she sat down next to him on the porch, folding her knees up and wrapping her arms around her legs, leaning into him a little.

“Want some company?” Beth asked, despite already having made herself at home by his side.

He turned his head to the side, away from her and exhaled some smoke. “Ya know anyone who might be interested to spend time with me?” he joked, glancing back at her when he felt her move even closer.

Beth turned her face toward him, pressing her lips against his shoulder as she looked up at him from underneath her lashes. “Hmm,” she hummed, “I think there might be a cute blonde somewhere who might.”

“Wonder who that might be,” Daryl smirked, leaning down to press his forehead against hers. Beth's eyes closed instantly and it didn't take more than a few seconds for her to lean up and press her lips against his softly. Still holding the cigarette with one hand, Daryl reached up and cupped her cheek with the other, his thumb stroking over the scar that she had there that would always remind him of just how strong she was.

They pulled apart after a while and went back to keeping an eye on the field. Beth's fingers were intertwined with his own and he couldn't remember if he had ever felt this at peace with himself. The silence between them was comfortable, as it had been since they had walked back to the farmhouse, but Daryl could feel that something was different with Beth.

There seemed to be something on her mind because she kept fiddling with his fingers and he didn't know how to ask her if anything was wrong. He had never been the best with words which was the reason that it had taken him so long to actually tell her the truth. Besides, he had always thought that she would push him away once he finally did admit that he had been lying to her about the two of them never knowing one another.

“Daryl,” Beth said after another moment, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, Beth?” he returned.

“What are we now?”

At her question, he turned around and looked at her. He had long ago stubbed out his cigarette but suddenly he felt the need for another one. Yet, he knew that this conversation was unavoidable and he needed to get through it with her.

“We're whatever ya want us to be,” he told her, deciding that it was up to her. He would never force her to be with him and he needed to hear it from her that she actually wanted that for them; that she wanted them to be together in every sense of the word.

“How do you feel about what happened between us?” Beth continued, giving him another question, though this one made him frown down at her.

“How can ya not know already?” he wondered as she blinked up at him. “Ya already know how I feel 'bout ya...” he trailed off when he was met with another dose of silence.

She knew, didn't she?

She knew that he hadn't been able to stop thinking about her when he had thought that she was dead. She knew that he had cared so deeply about her that he had had nightmares for months and that he had never forgotten, right? She _knew_ , didn't she?

Beth kept looking at him, her face not giving anything away. Daryl stared into her eyes, knowing that this was now or never. He needed to be one hundred percent sure when he told her the truth and he needed her to actually hear it.

“Beth,” he breathed her name out, so low that he thought the sound of it might be carried away with the wind if she hadn't been so close to him. Gazing into her eyes, he swallowed hard and forced himself to not break the contact.

“I love ya.”

Beth's fingers stopped playing with his instantly and it felt like something had snapped around them, sending everything into a silence that made Daryl's stomach turn. Something changed, not only in the atmosphere around them, but also in Beth's eyes. Daryl watched her as her mouth fell open slightly, but not a single word made it past her lips.

Daryl felt his stomach sink when she let go of his hand, standing up abruptly. He stared at her, too dumbstruck to say anything and she just looked at him for another moment, eyes wide and lips pressed together tightly, before turning around and walking away.

“ _Beth_ ,” her name slipped out of his mouth and he reached out to take her hand and pull her back in, already feeling how there was suddenly a ravine between the two of them. Dread bubbled up inside of him when he saw her pick up her pace and re-enter the house without a single word, leaving him on the porch.

He had told her that he loved her. He had admitted something that he had known for months and hadn't dared to ever think of saying to her and she had just walked away from him. He didn't even know what to think about that. All he knew for sure was that he had never felt more miserable.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, okay? I just had to send another curve-ball at the two of them, but don't worry, because the next chapter will be the last and I promise to fix everything! :) And don't forget that there will be a sequel too, but I'll give you more information on that when this story is finished! :) Also, you have no idea how much I struggled to update this chapter. My computer isn't working properly and it shut off every single time that I was going to press the update button. Either way,thank you so much for reading and don't forget to review!
> 
> I love ya all! xx


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter (nothing else needs to be said).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I can hardly believe that this is the final chapter of Blink! Wow, it's been a journey, really! I can't believe all the love that I've gotten for this story and I am so incredibly grateful for it! I know I've been horrible at times with all the angst and everything and sometimes I haven't had time to reply to everyone's reviews... But we're finally at the end of this story and I really hope that you guys will forgive Beth for reacting the way she did in the last chapter. I really hope that it will all make a lot more sense to you all!
> 
> Now, remember that there WILL be a sequel to this story! As of now, I'm still in the planning process, but I'm actually traveling tomorrow, so I'll have plenty of time on the plane to think of some ideas!
> 
> Either way, thank you once again for both reading and showing all of your love! Tell me what you think about this chapter as well and I'll see you again soon! Mwah!
> 
> Enjoy!

**In The Blink of an Eye (Hear The Beat of My Heart)**

### Chapter 27

 

There was a special kind of silence hanging over the farmhouse. The kind of silence that came to be when people knew that something was off around the house, but no one dared to break because no one really knew if it was their place to meddle. It had started early that morning when Beth had gotten down in the kitchen and met Daryl in the middle of the hallway. The two of them had stopped and looked at each other for a mere second before Daryl had lowered his gaze and stepped past the blonde, in front of both Maggie and Rick, not uttering a single word to either of them. Beth had opened her mouth, as if to say something, but then shut it tightly, not saying anything at all and simply continuing toward the kitchen.

The fact that Beth and Daryl once again seemed to be at odds with each other was something that everyone in the house learned pretty quickly, but no one knew whether they should actually intervene until one of them came to look for advice or just wanted to talk whatever it was out.

Rick and Michonne had gone on a short trip with Carl to look for some supplies for Judith, who was being taken care of by Maggie and Glenn today because the two of them wanted to learn more about babies in the growing stages to prepare for their own child. Sasha, Tyreese, Carol and Morgan were up and about, looking the basement and cleaning out any unnecessary things that they wouldn't be needing for the winter. Abraham, Rosita, Eugene and Tara were busy taking inventory of things they _would_ need and planning on how to rebuild the old barn into something where some of them could actually live if the house ever got too crowded.

Everyone was keeping busy and so were Beth and Daryl.

Daryl was out in the backyard, stocking up wood for the Winter in a neat pile.

In fact, he had been piling it up neatly, changing his mind, and then started piling it somewhere else for the past three hours or so. He didn't keep track of time though, because time had stopped the moment Beth had walked away from him when he had told her that he loved her last night.

He was angry. More with himself than with her, to be honest.

It was his fault that he decided to just tell her how he felt. On the other hand, she had asked him to tell her, which had made him assume that she actually wanted to hear the truth from him. Beth was the one who made him open up about pretty much everything and he had already told her how he had felt when he had been without her, but perhaps that hadn't been enough for her to actually understand the real truth?

Still, it didn't change the fact that he had admitted to her that he loved her, that he had fallen in love with her, and she just stood up and left him, just like he had always feared that she would if she ever found out. Daryl simply doesn't understand and that is what makes the entire thing a thousand times worse. He had been afraid that he would push her away by revealing his feelings and that was just what had happened. A part of him had been so certain that she would at least feel some of what he felt for her, but he had clearly been wrong about that. Now, they weren't speaking to each other again and he didn't know what to do about it. Just a day ago they had been cuddled up together, _showing_ just how much they cared for one another without unnecessary words to come between them.

Daryl almost wished he could turn back time and take back the words he had told her. Maybe then he could have kept himself from ruining everything good that had developed between them and he could have waited for Beth to actually be ready to hear how much he loves her.

Perhaps he wouldn't have been as miserable as he is now, if he had just waited.

* * *

Beth stared at the ceiling in her room. No, she was actually _glaring_ at it, wishing she had enough will to get up and sit in front of her mirror to glare at herself instead. But she couldn't though. She could barely get up after an entire day of avoiding Daryl and she was so mad at herself for being a coward instead of just telling him the truth.

When Daryl had told her last night that he loved her, she had felt like she wanted to soar for just a moment. She had had the words on the tip of her tongue, wanting to return them to him and admit that she loved him too, but then something had just crashed inside of her and she had frozen. She realized what he had actually just said to her and the reality of it all overwhelmed her in a way that she hadn't been ready for.

She didn't doubt that Daryl loved her because he had done so much to and for her to actually show her that he did. The problem though, was that she knew that she loved him too – the man that she had met after he had showed up with Morgan on the farmland along with the rest of her family, the man she had gotten to know and gotten to see pretty much every broken part of. She _knew_ that she loved him, but she had panicked because what if Daryl actually didn't love _her_ , but rather the memory of the girl she had been before she had lost her memories?

He had told her all those stories about her when she hadn't known that they were about her and he had made it clear just how much he had cared for her in the past. Knowing that and not knowing the girl she had used to be before she had been shot and presumed to be dead made Beth doubt herself. What if Daryl was just in love with the idea of her being alive again and was over-seeing the fact that she might never get her memories back? What if she didn't get them back and he eventually stopped loving her because she just wasn't the same girl anymore? What if she couldn't measure up to the person Daryl had known before and he decides that she isn't the person he wants to be with?

She couldn't handle the pressure of all those questions crashing in on her in the span of a millisecond, so she had done the only thing that she could; she had run.

Away from Daryl and away from the questions she wanted to ask him to ease her own doubt. He had given himself completely to her and admitted things that she knew were difficult for him to say and she had still just pushed him away. She hated herself for it now because she wished that she would have just talked to him instead of running. There was no doubt in Beth's mind that it must have looked very bad for her to just turn her back on him after he had confessed that he loved her, but she had just been so scared and the pressure of her past had been too much for her.

She knew that she had ruined things now and she wouldn't blame Daryl if he never wanted to speak to her ever again. Everything that she had told herself that she wouldn't do, she had done and with that, she might have just ruined the best thing that had ever happened to her since she had dug herself out of her own grave.

Beth knew that she needed to talk to Daryl and set things straight, but she didn't even know where to begin. So instead, she stayed curled up in a ball in her bed, allowing a few tears slip down the corner of her eyes, hoping that crying might relieve her of some of the pain that she was feeling in her chest, but knowing that there was truly only one way to soothe the ache in her chest.

* * *

An hour or so later it was already starting to get dark outside. Beth was still curled up on her side in her room, feeling utterly devastated with herself for having ruined the good thing that she and Daryl had going on. At moments she couldn't believe she had been so foolish as to simply walk away from him like that, and she hated herself for it. She could only imagine how he was feeling now. He probably felt rejected and heartbroken too… Unless he was stronger than that?

She knew that Daryl was one of the bravest and strongest people she knew, but that didn't mean that he couldn't take those emotions he was feeling for her and turn them into something else because she had been stupid and walked away in panic instead of staying with him. What if he actually began to despise her for leaving him like that? What if he never gave her the chance to explain herself?

Beth closed her eyes and took a calming breath, trying to will herself not to think about the worst case scenario. A knock on the door though caused her to jump up from the bed and she hurried to let the person in, half-hoping that it was Daryl that had finally come to see her after avoiding her all day long. On the other side though, Rick stood with Judith in his arms, the sweet little baby girl gurgling and reaching her hands out to Beth the moment she spotted her.

“Hey, Judy,” Beth smiled, despite the fact that her stomach sunk. Her eyes moved across the hallway to where Daryl's room was, but the door was closed. “Is everything okay, Rick?”

Rick shifted slightly on his feet, holding Judith to his chest as the little girl began nuzzling his neck while patting his cheek. “I just thought I'd check on you,” he answered. “Well, actually, Maggie asked me to come see if you were okay and all… You know how she can be.”

Beth let out a small chuckle and shook her head, knowing that her now hormonal sister's overprotective feelings would only become more prominent now that she was pregnant. “I'm okay,” Beth lied.

Rick seemed to see right through her though, because he raised an eyebrow at her. “Can I come in?” he wondered.

“Sure,” Beth replied, stepping aside. Rick walked into the room, still holding on to Judith who was now tugging on his hair. Beth watched him as he took a small look around the bedroom before finally settling to sit on the chair by the small desk.

“I don't wanna get in your business, Beth,” Rick began slowly once Beth closed the door, “and I sure as hell don't wanna get involved in whatever it is that's goin' on with you and Daryl.”

“There's nothing–” Beth began, but Rick shook his head, stopping her.

“Yeah, yeah, keep tellin' yourself that,” he said, a small smile on his lips. “Look,” he started again. “It really isn't any of my business, but Daryl is my brother and I care about you too. You're both a part of my family and I want ya to be happy.”

Beth looked at him, waiting for him to continue. She was sure that Rick had a point in all of this and she just needed to hear him out. Maybe he could come with some good advice? After all, he had known Daryl far longer than she had.

“If you have something to say, feel free to say it,” Beth said, biting her lip. She didn't want to come off as rude, but she was feeling kind of impatient here. She needed a solution and she didn't even know where to begin with the man that she knew that she was in love with.

“I just wanted to tell you that he's lost without you,” Rick said, looking into her eyes. She could see earnest in them and she understood that he was most likely referring to the time that they had all thought that she was dead. Before she could open her mouth to respond to his statement, Rick spoke again, “And I think you're lost without him too.”

Beth blinked a few times, knowing that it was the truth. She knew that she was independent and strong and whatever else she needed to be to survive in this world, however, she also knew that she didn't want to do all of that on her own. Before, she had thought that she would always be with Morgan, the man that she loved as a father because he was the only father figure that she could remember, but after letting Daryl in and seeing him grow and show parts of himself that she was sure he never would have shown anyone else, she knew that she wanted to share whatever time she had left with _him_.

Rick left shortly after he had said those words. Judith was falling asleep in his arms and Michonne and Carl had apparently gone out for a short walk, so he needed to put the baby to bed. Beth stayed in her room and her eyes moved to her journal. It didn't take long for her to pick it up and read through some of the things she had written months ago, before Daryl and the others had showed up on the farm.

“ _I keep dreaming about darkness. Someone is always calling my name. It's the same flash of something that I saw in that fire, when I first remembered what it was. He keeps calling after me and all I want to know is who he is…_ Was _, maybe… Is he still alive? Is he still looking for me? Is he still calling my name?_ ”

She swallowed thickly, feeling tears spring to her eyes. This was one of the earlier entries she had written, after Morgan had suggested she write down everything she remembered about herself. It wasn't until now that she realized that it had been about Daryl. He had been with her, even when they had been apart and that had to mean something, right? Her eyes skimmed over the pages.

“ _I don't understand why he's so quiet. Did I do something to him in the past? Something that I can't remember? My head has been hurting a lot today, probably because I keep trying to remember. I just can't though, and that makes Daryl's silence a hundred times worse._ ”

A tear slipped down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away when the door to her bedroom once again opened. She shut her journal and looked up, only to meet Morgan's soft eyes. He looked at her and she didn't bother hiding her tears.

“My sweet lil' Lady,” Morgan sighed, closing the door behind him, opening his arms. Beth stood up and crossed the room, burying her head in his chest as she let out a sob that shook her entire body. Morgan's hand moved over her back in a comforting manner as he tried to soothe her. “Talk to me, Beth,” he whispered. “Tell me what happened.”

“I love him, Morgan,” Beth cried, squeezing her eyes shut. “I love him so, so much and I made him doubt that because I walked away.”

“Does he–?”

“Yes,” Beth nodded, pulling away from him, wiping her tears. “He told me that he loves me and I just left him. That's how stupid I am.”

“ _That's how stupid I am_ ,” something echoed in her mind, but she tried to push it away for now.

“You're not stupid, lil' Lady,” Morgan said, shaking his head at her as he put his hands on her shoulders. “Tell me why you walked away, please?”

And so Beth did. She told Morgan about how she had finally been happy and how Daryl had confessed his love for her and how she had gotten everything she had wanted, only for her to throw it away because she was afraid.

“Do you want to be with him?” Morgan wondered once Beth finished talking.

“Of course I do,” Beth said, having finally calmed down a bit. They were both sitting on her bed and Beth was grateful that Morgan was there for her.

“If you really want to be with him, take a damn risk Lady,” Morgan told her. “Just tell the man how you feel and if he doesn't wanna hear you out, then I'll come after him with a shotgun.”

Beth couldn't help but giggle, brushing her hand under her nose. God, she felt disgusting when she looked down at her snot all over Morgan's shirt. He seemed to notice where her eyes had landed and he simply shrugged, telling her that she could wash it for him whenever.

“Don't let this ruin your chance at happiness, Beth,” Morgan continued after a moment. “I can tell how much Daryl cares for you and I do know that you love him too. You didn't even have to tell me that because I had you two figured out months ago. It was only a matter of time.” Beth didn't say anything, knowing very well that her friend knew her better than most. She had felt Morgan's eyes on her and Daryl quite a few times, but she had never stopped herself to consider that he might actually suspect that there were deeper feelings developing between the two of them.

“All I'm saying is that you should talk to Daryl about it, before it's too late,” Morgan added. “Try to make him understand why you walked away and maybe then, he'll surprise you.”

* * *

“You're being stupid again,” Michonne spoke from behind him. Daryl rolled his eyes, showing a couple of things in his backpack, checking on his bolts one more time before securing them in their place on his crossbow.

“Need some air,” he returned, not bothering to explain himself further. He had had yet another sleepless night and he knew that he needed to get away from the farmhouse to think about what he should do next. He couldn't stand being around Beth, knowing that he wasn't actually with her. The fact that she wasn't talking to him was slowly killing him and he just needed to leave for a little while.

“Even a blind person can see that she loves you too,” Michonne continued, speaking up about the thing that everyone else on the farm was thinking but keeping to themselves.

Daryl turned to glare at her, “Ain't none of your damn business.”

Daryl knew that he had fucked up with Beth. He knew that he shouldn't have just told her that he loved her the way that he did. But the fact was that he was so fucked up himself and now that he had put too much pressure on Beth, he had pushed things too far too fast and ruined everything.

“Should'a given her more time,” he muttered, more to himself than to anyone else, but Michonne seemed to have heard him clear as day.

“The two of you have had plenty of time to fall in love with each other,” she told him, giving him that look that told Daryl that she could see right through him. If anyone had known about his feelings for Beth, he was sure that Michonne was the one. She had most likely known even before he had, since the day that she had first caught sight of the tattoo that he had inked on his own skin.

“Hm...” Daryl hummed, deciding that it might be better for him to just keep his mouth shut before he said something that he would later regret. He had a habit of doing that, after all.

“So you're just going to leave then? _Again?_ ” Michonne snorted, tilting her head as she gave him a look that showed him just how much she was judging him.

“Just need some fuckin' air,” Daryl returned, zipping up his backpack. “Gonna be back before dinner. Just takin' a walk an' I don't need a fuckin' chaperone.”

“Suit yourself, but we both already know how this is going to end,” Michonne told him. “Have a nice walk.” With those words, the woman turned around and walked away, leaving Daryl and his thoughts alone again. He just needed to get away from the farmhouse, he kept telling himself. He just needed to leave for a little bit so that he could figure our a way to apologize to Beth and maybe even tell her that he had been high on nothing or just tired when he had told her that he loved her. Maybe he would be able to take it back and she would just let it go and they could go back to being as happy as they had been before he had messed it all up.

With his hands balled into fists, he glanced back toward the house one last time before setting off into the woods.

* * *

Beth walked down the stairs after finally deciding that it was time to talk to Daryl about everything that had happened between them. She needed to set him straight and tell him that she had been the one to make one of the biggest mistakes of her life by running from him. He had to understand where she was coming from and after talking to Morgan about it last night, Beth knew that she needed to talk to him because he _deserved_ an explanation.

She could imagine how much it must have taken for Daryl to confess his love for her and that alone made her feel a thousand times worse.

“You just missed him,” Michonne's voice shook her out of her thoughts. “ _Again_ ,” the woman added, an amused glint in her eyes.

“What are you talking about?” Beth frowned.

“Daryl,” Michonne explained. “You just missed him. He left like five minutes ago.”

Beth's mind was reeling again, just as it did every damn time that that hunter had gone off into the woods alone. This time though, Beth already had her knives strapped to her thigh holster and she didn't think twice about running.

She ran and she ran, for what felt like hours, but she knew that she had passed the big field in less than two minutes. Hurrying into the woods, her eyes moved over broken branches and twigs, looking for all the prints that she could find, trying to locate Daryl's footsteps. Trying to calm herself, she listened hard, hoping that she might hear him trudging alone in the forest, but nothing worked. Panic began settling into her chest as she imagined every worst case scenario. What if he came across walkers? What if he got bit or injured or just _killed_? What if he never learned how much she loved him back?

“ _Beth_?”

She stopped dead in her tracks, chest heaving with the panic attack that had just began. His voice had come from behind her and she spun around, sending her golden locks flying as she met his gaze.

“Daryl,” she breathed out, managing to calm herself enough to actually say his name. Her chest was still clenching painfully and her palms were sweating. She wanted to ask him why he had left, but she already knew the answer, so why bother?

“We need to talk,” she said instead, cringing at her choice of words because it might have just been the worst possible thing for her to say.

Daryl huffed, shaking his head, “Ain't anythin' to talk about.” He turned away from her and Beth took a quick step toward him.

“I love you,” she blurted out, her own eyes widening as she watched Daryl slowly turn back around to face her, a thousand emotions crossing his features.

* * *

He couldn't have heard her right. She hadn't just said what he thought she had said, right? It had to be his mind playing tricks on him.

When he had seen a flash of blonde hair running through the woods, he hadn't been sure that it had actually been Beth, but he had hurriedly followed, in case she had decided to run away or something. He had watched her stop in the clearing that they now stood in, panting and staring wide-eyed at her surroundings while mumbling a single word again, and again, and again. Daryl wasn't sure that he had heard it right at first, but then, he realized that the blonde actually _had_ been saying _his name_ , over and over again, as if in a trance. So when he had approached her, it had been purely because he had seen panic flaring up in her eyes and some kind of worry that he had never seen before.

He had meant it when he had told her that they didn't need to talk about anything, because he had been ready to just go back to the way things were. Okay, he loved her and after sleeping with her too, he wasn't sure that he would actually ever be able to fully return to the way things had been before, but he could always try for her sake.

But then, she'd told him those three little words that had haunted him since he had spoken them to her that night.

_I love you_.

Daryl couldn't tear his eyes away from hers. His heart was thumping so loudly inside his chest that he was certain that she might actually be able to hear it from where she stood.

“No ya don't,” he said and then mentally berated himself for sounding like a stupid kid or something.

“I _do_ , Daryl,” Beth said, taking a step closer to him. He just watched her, not knowing if he should speak again. Maybe it was just his time to listen? “I need to explain myself,” she said, fiddling with the strap of her thigh holster. Daryl tried his best to not allow the images of her creamy thighs wrapped around him consume him.

“I don't need your explanation, Beth,” he spoke. “I think I got it that night.”

“You don't _understand_ ,” Beth insisted, running a hand through her locks. “Just shut up and listen for a minute, please?”

He was amused by how she could be both polite and rude at the same time and then he curtly nodded, giving her consent to speak.

She gave him a grateful look before taking a deep breath. “When you told me that you loved me that night, I didn't run away because I didn't feel the same way,” she said. “I felt as if you had given me the world, Daryl,” she let out a shaky breath and when Daryl realized that her eyes were slowly filling with tears, he subconsciously took a step closer to her. “You gave me everything I had ever hoped for when you told me how you felt and I was stupid to just walk away without telling you that I love you too.” She took a step toward him, brushing the back of her hand over her eyes, wiping away tears that had been close to falling. Her voice was thicker when she spoke again and he could tell that she was barely keeping herself together. “I was just afraid, I guess,” she shrugged, obviously trying to belittle her emotions.

“Afraid of what?” Daryl frowned, his own voice husky.

“What if you're just in love with the idea of me?” Beth wondered out loud. “What if you fell for the girl that I used to be and your mind is just tricking you into believing that I'm the same girl?”

“You're not makin' any sense, Beth,” Daryl told her. She really wasn't, to him. She was going on and on about who she had been before and him falling in love with that girl, but he didn't understand what the problem was.

“I might never remember,” she explained. “I don't want to disappoint you by not being _that_ girl that you fell for. You talked about her so much and I knew that you loved her. What if she's gone forever from my head and there's just _this_ ,” she motioned to herself, “left? What if I can't live up to the person that I was before?”

Daryl frowned, taking another step toward her, but she held her hand up to stop him. “I _want_ you, Daryl,” she continued before he had a chance to speak. “I do love you, more than anything, but I'm just too scared of not being the girl that you really love… I need you to understand where I'm coming from here.”

“I get it now,” Daryl replied, his heart almost breaking as he recalled the last words that Beth Greene had spoken in that damned hospital before he had lost her.

“Then please consider that, and if you still want me as I am now...” Beth trailed off, looking down at her feet, almost shyly. “Then I'm yours.”

Daryl watched her silently as she glanced up at him again before sighing. It seemed like his silence had stretched on for far too long, even though it felt as if time had stopped altogether. Beth turned around and began taking a step away from him, but before she could walk away, Daryl reached out, wrapping his rough fingers around her wrist, pulling her close. Beth's small frame collided with his chest and within less than a second, Daryl had tangled his fingers into her silky hair and brought her mouth to his.

Beth responded immediately, wrapping her arms around his neck, her fingers running through his hair as he walked her backwards, toward one of the trees. Somewhere along the way, Beth had managed to jump up and wrap her legs around his waist, securing herself as Daryl pressed her back against one of the trees, kissing her with every ounce of love that he held for her.

He broke their kiss, his lips still hovering over hers, brushing against them lightly as they panted against each other, breathing each other in.

“It don't matter if ya don't remember,” Daryl whispered, as if it was some kind of secret that was just supposed to be shared between the two of them. “You're the _woman_ I fell in love with, Beth. I want ya like ya are now an' I don't expect ya to change. If ya remember, _fine_ , if ya don't. I don't give a flyin' fuck.” Beth sniffled and let out another tearful chuckle against his lips. Daryl reached up and brushed away the tear that fell down her cheek before resting his thumb against her lower lip, moving over it slowly. “I just want _you_ ,” he told her. “Because though I didn't realize it before… I was always yours.”

Beth's palms came to rest on his cheeks for just a second before she pulled him in for another kiss and Daryl just _knew_ , that things between them would be okay now. They loved each other and he understood that just as he would always have doubts in himself, she would always doubt that she was living up to the person she had been before. However, he had meant it when he had told her that it didn't matter to him. He had fallen in love wholeheartedly with the woman she had become, even though he had loved the girl she had been too. The important thing here though was that he knew that he would do his very best to erase all doubts that she held inside her heart, just like she was slowly taking away his own.

His lips moved against hers in a languid and slow kiss as he recalled all those months ago when he had thought that she was gone forever. She had surrounded him ever back then, without him knowing it. He had meant it when he had said that he hadn't realized it at first, but he had always been hers; ever since they burned down that moonshine shack. Wherever he had gone after he had thought that she had died, she had always been with him in his hear and in his mind. Everything that he had seen had reminded him of her and her words and it had all just been so painful for him, but that wasn't what mattered now.

Because yes, even though she had always been with him, always surrounded him in everything that he saw – even though she was _everywhere_ – she was also _here_.

She was with him again and he had her and he loved her and she loved him back. She was there with him, in the woods and that was _everything_.

And if either of them had anything to say about it, she would be, until the end.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He he he... Who noticed the callback to the first chapter in the end with Beth bein there? If you did, great job! As I've said so many times now, thank you so much for reading and don't forget to follow me on tumblr or here so that you'll know when the sequel gets posted.
> 
> Don't forget to tell me what you thought about this final chapter and remember to be kind! Love ya all! xx

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, before you say anything, let me explain: I've been reading a lot of "Beth Survives" theories on tumblr and to be honest, I'm probably in Denial Land, but hey, I can always write fanfiction, right?  
> So that is exactly what I decided to do!  
> In this fic, Beth turns out to be alive, but she is suffering from severe memory loss. I won't be jumping straight into the Bethyl relationship, because they will obviously need to build their relationship up again considering that Beth doesn't remember any of them. Be patient and please do comment and share your thoughts! :)  
> Thank you for reading!  
> xoxo


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